Chapter Text
The day had been exhausting, slow and endless. He'd been planning to go to the gym to unwind a little, but by the end of it, his brain had been too fried for even that.
Jungkook dragged himself home, just longing for a nap on the couch, right there in plain view where Jimin might see him and come give him a hug. That would surely help.
He finally, finally walked in the door, but he stopped in his tracks when he heard an unfamiliar voice come from Jimin’s room. He frowned, toeing off his shoes. He couldn’t make out the words, but it sounded agitated.
He strained to hear what was going on as he dropped his bag off on the couch.
"Where’s the harm in checking?"
"You’ve checked plenty already."
"Being thorough is good, isn’t it? I know you always liked it when I took my time."
Jungkook froze, blood running cold. He recognised that voice.
"Okay, time’s up. Get out now, I’m busy."
"Doesn’t seem like you’ve been getting busy, babe." The guy laughed, and then the door was swinging open, Jungkook’s fear confirmed.
It was him. That guy he’d seen when he came to visit for the guided tour. The guy that had been sucking a hickey on Jimin’s neck.
Jimin was pushing him out of his room, but when he saw Jungkook, he paled.
"Jungkook-ah."
"Mm, who’s this?" The guy said, stopping with his shoulders brushing against Jimin’s now that Jimin had stopped pushing him.
When Jungkook said nothing, Jimin spoke up. "This is Jungkook, my flatmate."
He felt the word stab through his chest like a lance. Flatmate. Not even friend, after everything.
"Nice to meet you, buddy." The guy extended a hand to Jungkook, completely failing to read the room. "I’m Kijung, Jimin’s—"
Jungkook looked at him with utter disgust. "We've met already."
"Have we?"
Jimin pushed him again, more harshly than before. "Leave."
"Ouch, babe!" The guy brought a hand to his heart in mock devastation. "That’s how you treat old friends, who helped you out during hard times?"
"Get out of my house, Kijung."
"Alright, I’m going. What's got you all so angry all the time? You should all consider chilling the fuck out once in a while."
"Out!" He pushed him all the way to the door.
The guy really seemed to be enjoying getting Jimin all angry, snickering and letting himself be pushed. "Good luck dealing with that mood, little guy," he told Jungkook.
Jungkook just glared at him.
"Call me, if—"
Jimin shut the door before he could finish his sentence, and then the apartment was quiet.
Jungkook couldn’t even look at him.
Was he still fucking this guy? This whole time, weeks of this thing they had, that Jungkook thought was building towards something, and he’d been still fucking this guy on the side?
But why would it have mattered to Jimin, if he only thought of Jungkook as his flatmate.
"Jungkook-ah. He just came over because—"
"Oh, I got why."
"No, it’s not that." Jimin walked to Jungkook hurriedly, putting his hand on Jungkook’s arm. Jungkook pulled away. Jimin's face fell, and something inside Jungkook burned victoriously.
"It’s not. He lost something, this—usb stick, thing, I don’t know. And he kept insisting I let him look in my room too, even though there’s no way—"
"You don’t have to explain yourself to me." Jungkook could barely recognise his own voice. Jimin twisted his hands in front of his chest, obviously wanting to reach out again. "Don’t have to lie to me, either."
‘I’m not—Jungkook," he went to reach out again, but Jungkook brushed him off, finally feeling like he was snapping out of it. He grabbed the back he’d just dropped on the couch and slipped his feet into his shoes quickly, ignoring Jimin talking to him.
He heard Jimin come after him, but he was faster, running down the stairs and bursting out into the crowded pavement with angry tears flooding his eyes. He must have made quite the sight, hurrying down the street in untied shoes, barely looking where he’s going.
He made it to Yoongi’s house in record time, and when Yoongi opened his door, Jungkook fell onto his chest, panting.
Yoongi let him cling for a minute, until he caught his breath.
"What’s wrong?" Yoongi asked as he sat Jungkook down on the armchair, settling on the coffee table.
When he explained, Yoongi sighed. "You never really talked, did you?’
Jungkook shook his head, sniffling.
"Ah, kid."
"'M not a kid." Jungkook mumbled, more of an automatic reaction than anything.
"You’re staying here tonight?"
He nodded, looking at Yoongi with pleading eyes.
"Don’t give me that look. This offer is only good for one night. Tomorrow, you go and fix it or you get a hostel, okay?"
"I don’t know how to fix it." Jungkook sounded so miserable even to his own ears.
"Do you know how to get a hostel?"
"Hyung, I’m serious."
"Right, right. Well. You think Jimin was really sleeping with this guy the whole time?"
Jungkook winces. "I don’t know. I haven’t seen him in our apartment, and I haven’t heard him talk to him, or anything, but the way this guy was talking…"
"Maybe it’s just a sleazy guy, Kook. Lost usb stick sounds like a pretty sleazy guy excuse to get himself into an old hook-up’s apartment."
"You think?"
"Don’t take my word for it. But do listen to me when I tell you, again: if you want something real from Jimin, you need a real conversation. Kissing him in secret is good fun, but it’s not a relationship. And you want a relationship, don’t you?"
Jungkook sniffed, tears coming to his eyes again. God, he did. He really did. He wanted to be Jimin’s boyfriend, and for Jimin to be his, and he wanted to not have to hide from Jin anymore, he wanted to tell his parents, and sleep in Jimin’s bed, and go on dates with him and everything, he wanted everything.
He nodded.
Yoongi nodded back. "Time for your first big boy relationship talk, then."
✨
Jungkook was a nervous wreck as he sipped at his hot chocolate.
Jimin had texted so many times during the night. Jungkook had only texted back this morning, biting his lip raw, asking him to meet for a coffee in a small coffee shop on campus. Before he'd even put his phone down, it had pinged with a response: I’ll be there.
Jungkook arrived twenty minutes early, stress making him nauseous. Yoongi was the one that had suggested a coffee shop, a neutral space, and Jungkook was glad he listened, the sweet taste of his drink helping him to calm down.
He hadn’t slept a lot, so he must have looked a bit rough. He ran a hand through his hair, suddenly self conscious about how it looked.
"Hey." Jungkook looked up and there was Jimin. He was in a huge sweater and jeans, his little back slung over his body. He looked like he’d had a rough night too. Or maybe it was wishful thinking.
"Hi."
Jimin sat down, clutching his phone in his hands. He didn’t take his eyes off Jungkook for even a second as Jungkook tried to calm himself down enough from the nerves eating at his stomach.
There was silence for a minute. Jimin spoke first.
"Where did you go last night?"
"Yoongi-hyung."
Jimin nodded, relief clear on his face, like he’d worried about him.
"That’s what I thought. Jin-hyung was asking. Didn’t he call you?"
"I didn’t answer. Yoongi-hyung texted him, I think, so he wouldn’t worry."
"You didn’t answer me, either." It wasn’t a reproach. Just a gentle statement.
"I know. I…" Jungkook rubbed his hands over his thighs. "I didn’t read them. Your messages."
"Oh."
"I just wanted to say, um. If they were an explanation...you didn’t need to."
"I did. Jungkook-ah, of course I did." Jimin reaches his hands out, putting his palm down on Jungkook’s side of the table. "I couldn’t let you think that I was with Kijung."
"Why couldn’t you?’
Jimin blinked. "Because," he said, sounding lost. "You were upset."
Jungkook shrugged. "Okay. And? I can be upset about a lot of things. I’m not your responsibility to comfort, am I?" The anger from last night stirred in his gut. "After all, I’m just your flatmate, aren’t I?"
Jimin’s voice was barely audible. "Jungkook."
Jungkook was twisting his fingers harshly in his lap, hurting, but that was nothing compared to how his heart was trembling. His shoulders were so tense he knew it would fuck him up tomorrow, but what did it matter.
"Please don’t say that. You know it’s not true."
"I know?" Jungkook looked Jimin straight in the eye, saw him recoil a little. "How do I know? I’m the one always saying things and doing things and chasing you, all the time. When have you once—" he took a breath to keep the tremble out of his voice, "when have you once done the same?"
Jimin was silent, and Jungkook was trying very hard not to cry.
"So if I’m not just your flatmate, what am I," he murmured, looking up again.
Jimin didn’t answer right away. He was clutching at his phone on the table, fingers white. "Jungkook-ah. You got this all wrong."
Jungkook's breath hitched, heart in fucking pieces just with a few choice words. "Oh."
So Jimin had never felt the same.
He squeezed his eyes shut, a headache creeping up, and a tear rolled down his cheek. He wanted to run away, but he was too stunned and heartbroken to move.
Jimin shot out of his chair at the sight of Jungkook crying, sitting down in the one next to him and reaching for him immediately. He turned Jungkook’s face towards him and Jungkook let him, powerless to resist the way Jimin touched him, even if this didn't make sense.
He wiped Jungkook’s tears away with a broken expression. "No, no, no, baby, don’t—god, don’t cry. That's not what I meant."
Jungkook’s heart jumped. Baby?
Jimin sounded choked up now too. He had one hand behind Jungkook, palm resting on the delicate skin of his neck, making him shiver, and the other on his cheek, gentle.
'Sorry," Jungkook said, going to pull away. Jimin held him firmly in place, and Jungkook looked at him, confused and hurting. "Hyung, please."
"That came out wrong." Tears in Jimin's eyes now, too. What a picture they must make the two of them. "I'm an idiot. I thought about what I wanted to tell you all night, and yet I come here and I fuck it up and now you're crying. Shit, I'm sorry. That I’m such a mess, that I made you think—I just didn’t realise, Jungkook-ah."
Jimin wasn't making sense. Jungkook would have to participate if he wanted to understand. "You and Kijung?"
"Are nothing. We were never anything. He was just there, when I needed...someone. Anyone."
"Was it the same with me?" Jungkook can't bear to look at him as he asks this. "Were we...what we were just because I was there? Because I kept coming to you, like he did?"
Jimin leaned down to catch his eye, looking horrified. "Not even a little. You're nothing like him."
He sighs, visibly trying to gather his thoughts. "I didn’t realise you couldn’t see it. I thought I was being obvious, I was...I was trying so hard to hold myself back.’
"Why?"
"Because—" Jimin made a frustrated sound. "It’s still so new to me. This feeling, I swear it came out of nowhere, and it knocked me off my feet. I didn’t know what it was until you started dating that guy. And sometimes the way you looked at me, I thought, maybe…but then I told myself I was imagining things."
"You weren’t," Jungkook said. Jimin smiled a little, for the first time in all this.
"I know that now. But then I was just thinking, god, this is so inappropriate, I’m crushing on my friend’s little brother. I bet he just sees me as Jin’s stuck up flatmate, he’d never—’
Jungkook was floored. How could Jimin read him so wrong?
"But when we danced together—I just knew. I knew you felt something back. And I just couldn’t help myself that night."
"But the next day, you said it wasn’t a good idea." Jungkook was so confused, trying to keep up.
"Because you said you’d liked me since the beginning. What the fuck, Jungkook-ah. You really made me feel stupid, that day." Jimin laughed, pushing his forehead against Jungkook’s for a moment.
‘I’m sorry."
‘Stop apologising, please. It’s just…" Jimin sighed. "What I felt for you was so new. And I didn’t want to disappoint you. That’s why I never…I just thought, I’ll see how it goes. I’ll see if it goes away, and if it doesn’t, then I’ll tell him."
Jungkook blinked, trying to understand.
Jimin sounded like he was scolding himself. "I should have told you that. I shouldn't have let you keep kissing me, and ask you to sneak around, and hover like that, I…I should have told you, and then I should have kept my distance for a while."
"Why didn’t you?’
"Because I liked it," Jimin said, sounding ashamed. "I liked when you sought me out and kissed me in secret. Made me feel so wanted, and…I don’t know, all the sneaking around, the giggling...it was fun. It's been a while since this kind of thing has been fun." His hand caressed a line up Jungkook’s neck and came to softly grasp at his earlobe. Jungkook shivered.
Jimin’s face turned completely sombre again."Did I ruin it? Did I fuck it up? I’d understand, hm? I mean, I acted like a total child. Led you on, and—"
"It’s only leading me on if you don’t want me," Jungkook said, his heart in his throat. He turned his body sideways to face Jimin, feeling like he might faint, but he asked the question he had to ask. "Do you want me, hyung?"
Jimin looked at him, face flushed. Time stopped, in those few seconds, like it was determined not to put Jungkook out of his misery.
But then Jimin leaned in, and right there, in front of a coffee shop full of people, kissed him on the lips.
It was loud, it was clear. Jungkook had an answer, finally.
But Jimin didn't stop there. He pulled back enough to look at him in the eyes, grasped Jungkook’s chin in his hand.
"Jungkook-ah, I like you so much."
Jungkook’s breath hitched at the emotion in Jimin’s words. "I’m sorry I wasn’t more clear about it before. I’m sorry I hurt you. But I like you more than—" Jimin laughed a little, disbelieving, "more than I’ve ever liked anyone, maybe." He swallowed hard, looking at Jungkook almost fearfully. "And I do want you. If you want me."
Jungkook stood there frozen for a long moment, his head swimming.
Then he lunged at Jimin, pressing little excited kisses all over his face. Quick, darting little things, exploding like fireworks the way his heart was in his chest.
A kiss to his flushed cheek, a kiss on his cute thin nose, a kiss on his chin, corner of his eye, three kisses for his forehead, and finally, Jungkook’s favourite.
The longest, sweetest kiss for the prettiest lips, for the prettiest boy Jungkook had ever seen, even after all this time.
Then he hid his face in Jimin’s neck, trembling with joy and embarrassment.
"Is everyone looking?"
Jimin dropped a kiss on his head. "Let them look."
✨
They needed to tell Jin first. Both brother and flatmate status made him top priority among the rest of their friends, plus he was the likeliest one to have a…special reaction. They agreed on that much on the way back from the coffee shop, hands held tightly between them.
Seeing the apartment the same as he left it felt strange. He hadn’t even been gone even twenty-four hours, but he felt so different that it was bizarre not to see it reflected in the familiar space.
Jungkook dropped his stuff on the floor next to the door, toeing off his shoes. It was quiet.
‘Okay, he’s not here. So, how do we—"
Jimin turned him around sharply and then he was on him. Jungkook thought he knew what it was like to be kissed by Jimin; turns out he'd never been more wrong.
He was licking into his mouth, pulling at his hair, hungry. It seemed like the unsure, uncertain Jimin was all that Jungkook had known so far, and he was in for a fucking treat with new, committed Jimin.
Jungkook had absolutely no issue with that.
Still, priorities.
"Hyung," he said, between kisses, "we need—to talk."
"Mmm, we will," Jimin said, slipping both his arms around Jungkook’s neck. He kissed him again."Let’s talk, hm?"
Jungkook felt Jimin jump and wrap his legs around his waist. On instinct, he put his hands under Jimin’s thighs to steady him. What the fuck.
Jimin was kissing down his neck. "Hyung, ah, this isn’t talking." He was whining, he thought absently in a corner of his mind.
Jimin blinked at him innocently, completely at odds with his rough appearance. Jungkook had done that. "Oh, you meant right now?"
Jungkook laughed, absolutely smitten. He pushed his forehead against Jimin’s, giggling. "You’re something else."
Jimin’s own smile spread slow and wide on his flustered face. "You’re one to talk, Jungkook-ssi," he said, running his hands over Jungkook’s biceps and up his shoulders.
So, gym subscription, good investment.
And okay, once again: Jungkook, only human, only gay, and only so strong against Park Jimin. "So, talk later?" Jungkook said breathlessly. Jimin let out a victorious giggle. He kissed Jungkook’s jaw roughly and started trailing downwards again, and—
The slam of a door and a familiar scream echoed across the whole apartment.
Fucking Jin.