Chapter Text
“Hey are you okay?” I remember, the first time he called my name. It was right about the time I was leaving to get auntie out of the hospital after she gave birth to klee. I had never heard such warm voice in my life, it was like a blast of inspiration, the calmness I needed in that exact moment.
He had such an essence to himself. Something nobody seemed to notice at first, the brightness of his smile made him stand out from everyone else.
I sighed, as tears fell down my face, my worries started to clear out. He just sat besides me as he tried to console me. I’m pretty sure he didn’t even know why I was crying, or the reason that I was in the hospital, but it didn’t seem to matter to him.
He seemed to have been waiting for someone to get out of one of the rooms. His eyes were red as if he had cried, i didn’t worry about him, that was my mistake.
Soon a girl ,just as beautiful as him, appeared with a bandaged arm. They seemed like twins. He stood up and seemed to fast talk out of nervousness, it made me smile, I really needed that. His sister on the other side just smiled. While the sister checked out he came to talk to me.
“I think we study on the same school, do you need me to stay?”. That’s my core memory of him. He looked brighter than any light on the waiting room. His hand reaching out to me, with his eyes open wide as if the words I was about to say meant the world to him.
Finally I convinced him to go. “Alright, here’s my number. I’m gonna go buy some bandages and alcohol for my sister. Give me a call if you need me” and he disappeared.
But I don’t think I fell in love with him in that moment. Of course I love his kindness, but the reason I started to feel this way was months after, when we were at my house, we were supposed to be watching a movie, but we talked instead. That’s when i saw it, talking about his future, his love, his determination. His eyes were the brightest I’ve ever seen. Truly a wonderful sight.
I think I must have realized sooner that this sight could be witnessed by other people. People who would now the real worth of it, people who wouldn’t be scared to show their love.
Now here I am, after I made sure nobody bothers him today. And although I’m making an effort now, it’s too late. I should have done it since the start, I shouldn’t have ignored his feelings towards me. I felt the same, but I didn’t realize, just how precious he is. And now although his new relationship is fake, I can’t help but wonder, what is the sight I’m seeing from his partner?.
The brightness of the one I love isn’t mine, it never was, and if I had known it what would have I done then?.
Now here I am, from the other side of the hall, watching his smile bright everywhere in this building. But not towards me. They are hugging, and his partner, he is giving everything I never could, the protection my beloved needed, the warmth he gave everyone else, the need to have him all by himself.
I don’t think they even realize that. And because of my ignorance, I’m left as an outsider…..
That could have been me.
Please, Xiao, love him. He deserves it. Love him, and don’t let your pride drive you away from his love. Not like me. Please, make him happy.
And even if I just get to see, I’ll be glad if me stepping back can make him happy. Because I’ll know, that his brightness still gets to me in a way.