Chapter Text
He was barely able to fall asleep when the alarm went off loudly. Beomgyu had never been bad at sleeping, at all and probably all the way around. But there was simply too many things going around his head at the same time, which was another thing kinda new for him because he always tried to keep his thought at a minimum when he was about to sleep.
How could he, if the only thing he could feel each time he closed his eyes, was the softness and warmth from Taehyun’s lips? If he could feel the memories piling in his mind, memories he had dig into the back of his mind when they cut contact? If he knew how much Taehyun wanted him?
Beomgyu groaned in his pillow, turning around and trying to go back to sleep before another alarm went off. He hated himself for knowing his lame ass so well. Taking his phone—and finally not Taehyun’s android monstrosity— he unlocked it, turning off his annoying alarm and checking on the messages. There was still a bunch from Yeonjun and Soobin he never got to see, after… well, the incident happened. But on top of them all, there was a couple that captured his attention.
‘DO NOT ANSWER BY ANY CIRCUMSTANCES (5 new messages)’
Oh yeah, Taehyun.
DO NOT ANSWER BY ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
‘Hey’
‘Still sleeping?’
‘Things dont really change, huh?’
‘Meet me at the studio at 9’
‘We have to practice, you have a concert tomorrow [Location]’
Holy shit, he had a concert.
You
‘It’s fucking 7 in the morning, let me live.’
DO NOT ANSWER BY ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
‘Very late, we should have started by 6’
You
‘You’re SICK in the head. I’m gonna shower bye’
DO NOT ANSWER BY ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
‘Stop getting my body naked.’
You
‘Well if you want to appear in Dispatch for being dirty, ok’
DO NOT ANSWER BY ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
‘Fine, but make it quick, I’m here already.’
————
Beomgyu was completely exhausted as he sat down on the floor of the dance practice room, groaning as his whole body laid down on the floor, legs aching as if he had ran a marathon.
It wasn’t even the already five hours he had spent dancing choreographies over and over because apparently, Taehyun had a way better stamina and an extremely stronger body, more than him at least. It was that he was being guided by Taehyun itself and spending too much time with him was not very good for his mental health.
“Please give me a break, I feel like I will be deceased in the next 2 minutes.”
“You can’t, we have—I have an interview, but you’re coming with me.” Beomgyu just groaned once more, letting his sweaty forehead to touch the cold floor, sighing in relief.
“Why?”
“Because it is your interview. Not truly mine.” He could hear the annoyance in Taehyun’s voice, but yeah, he might had a point there. “So you are coming anyway. Now, get up, we can do this an hour more and then I can drag you to shower, you stink.”
“Excuse me? This is literally you, you sweat like a beast.” Beomgyu lifted his upper half to look at Taehyun with a death stare. “So shut up.”
“Don’t make me get you up.”
“You couldn’t in that weak body of mine. Remember you’re not a muscular hottie anymore.” He couldn’t stop the yelp that came out from his lips when his body was lifted, but it was impossible because he was sure he would be unable to lift Taehyun. “What are you doing!?”
“Getting you up. Can’t you tell?” And he rolled his eyes in a way that made Beomgyu want to punch his own face. “Now, just an hour more and we can leave.”
The thing was, Beomgyu though as his body ached deeply up to the bones, that even with the practice, he wasn’t sure he could pull a full concert. The idea was terrifying. Not because of performing a concert himself, no, he had done his handful of his own concerts, he was even a senior of Taehyun, that wasn’t what was stuck in his mind.
It was about delivering the same level of performance that Taehyun did.
Again, he wasn’t trying to sabotage himself (maybe a little) but he was wide aware of how much of a better dancer and singer Taehyun was. He was a natural, his hard work only piled to the insane amount of talent that tiny body of his held inside. He had snatched one of the big awards from his hands in his first year of career, he had left him second in various lists and votings. And Beomgyu hated that he felt so attracted to him when they first met, in person, in the backstage of Music Bank and Taehyun had bowed to him with such respect and politeness it left him dumbfounded.
“Beomgyu-hyung.”
He blinked, looking at Taehyun, who was staring at him with an arched brow. “What?”
“I literally talked to you four times. What were you thinking?”
“Nothing. I just spaced out, seems that your brain doesn’t work good enough.”
“Before wanting to be an idol, I was on my way to become an astrophysicist, so… I think it is you and you only, I’m sorry to break the news to you, hyung.”
“You were going be to a…. What?” Taehyun simply shrugged, ignoring completely what Beomgyu had asked him. “That’s impossible?”
“Do you think I’m lying?”
“I DIDN’T SAY THAT.” His response was immediate and loud, very charming of him.
“You implied it.” Maybe, he wanted to say. But it was simply unfair that he got the whole package and what about Beomgyu? There was literally God’s favorites and he wasn’t in the list.
“I kinda hate you.” He mumbled, trying to not let Taehyun hear him and he thought he had gotten away with it when he heard him.
“No, you don’t. You like me.” Beomgyu was about to open his mouth, when he said. “Probably not more than I like you, but still.”
He hated him. He hated him so much.
“Huh.” Was his big contribution to the conversation and also a final point to it. Beomgyu was really trying to ignore the smugged smile on Taehyun’s lips—he had never looked really good doing that and his face was too pretty for it—as they walked to the car, his hair still kinda wet from the shower he had just taken. The company wasn’t Beomgyu’s favorite place to take showers, but there was no way he would make it home and back to the interview on time and going all sweaty like that was absolutely not an option. Taehyun had handled him a bunch of clean clothes that he wasn’t sure from where he had gotten and he dressed trying to ignore the fact the other was still close enough to see him from a distance. But luckily, Taehyun was distracted typing on his phone, probably with Kai.
The silence that had fallen over the both of them was thick, condensed in some kind of sentiment that Beomgyu wasn’t able to fully grasp or that maybe didn’t want to grasp. He looked at the younger, still finding strange all this thing about looking at himself from outside, he was still concentrated in the bright screen in front of his eyes typing at a very fast speed and ignoring fully any effort from Beomgyu to establish eye contact. It wasn’t like he wanted it anyway, in first place. He must have been staring to hard because suddenly, Taehyun lifted his head and turned to look at him, making Beomgyu to turn around and look out of the window, trying to conceal his embarrassment.
“Are we eventually going to address the elephant in the room or you’re just going to evade me until we manage to go back to normal?” Taehyun really loved to make things more complicated than they should, it was supposed to be a good trait, to be a little confrontational, but right now it was getting on Beomgyu’s nerves.
“Are you all the time a menace or I will have chance to breathe here?”
“Well, you own me a handful of explanations, I don’t think I’m being particularly a menace. I think you know that part of me good enough to know how to differentiate them.”
“Can we talk about this later? I promise you, we will, I just need these two days to pass by, don’t you think we have enough to stress about right now?”
“The problem it is that there is always something else to worry about, how else did you let over a year pass before we came to this? Fuck, Beomgyu, assume that we wouldn’t even here talking if it wasn’t for this that happened. You’d be living your life happily, ignoring me and just plain pretending nothing happened.”
“Taehyun.” He hissed and honestly, he was trying to not make it sound so hostile. “Really.”
“I admire you, as a musician. I looked up to you, while I was training. I still do. But I feel like you’re letting me down as a fucking person and I really don’t like that.” Beomgyu couldn’t stop but look at him, he couldn’t stop himself, hearing how hurt Taehyun sounded. He really didn’t like that. “Just tell me, what the fuck did I do to you for you to treat me like this?” Beomgyu wanted to cry. Contrary to the popular belief, he didn’t cry of sadness a lot, just usually the overwhelming emotion in concerts or awards, but it has been a very long time since he had cried from the rupturing feeling he was having right now. “Tell me, give me an explanation and I will leave you alone.”
“I…” Beomgyu started, his voice cracking. “I don’t k-know…”
“Are you serious?” Taehyun sounded borderline hysterical, his voice going up and down in disbelief. “So I spent—fuck, over a year fucking thinking about this every single day, every single night, everytime I had to see you in music shows, backstages and awards… For you to tell me that there was no reason? Are you lying to me? Because… Because I really, really don’t want to believe you—Where you just playing with me that whole time?” Beomgyu didn’t want to look at him. Not because he was right, he wasn’t, he really wasn’t. He had never wanted to make Taehyun feel that way, he had never—
The door of the car suddenly opened and Beomgyu tried to brush off the tears that were fighting on his watery eyes to fall down. “Taehyun…” He tried to call for him, but the other ignored him and got off the car quickly, almost in a rush. Beomgyu followed him, knowing he couldn’t do anything now, not when they were in public, were anyone could see them. Dispatch would be feasting on them making a public scene, they couldn’t allow that. He couldn’t allow that.
So, taking courage, he swallowed up the feeling he had and walked next to Taehyun, who had pulled up the hood of his hoodie over his head and looked down to the floor. Beomgyu tried to not look around, trying to be as imperceptible as possible, knowing just a picture of his —Taehyun’s— face would be needed to start a controversy. He swallowed hard, entering the building behind Taehyun and bowing slightly to the people welcoming them. Beomgyu wondered for a moment if he would get too many questions about why he was accompanied by Kang Taehyun, of all people.
In first place, it was absolutely weird that it only took a simple ‘we are trying to solve some stuff between us’ to his manager to receive a thumbs up and a small warning. ‘Don’t let the public get to see you two too much’. And Beomgyu knew it was a little too late when both of their names didn’t stop trending on twitter for a day already.
He wanted to talk to Taehyun, but arriving to the studio meant that too many people were around and tugging Taehyun —Beomgyu— from here to there, putting make up on him, styling his hair, switching his clothes, fixing his microphone and pack. None questioned his —Taehyun’s— presence and it was better for him, knowing that all people in the room weren’t able to say whatever happened in that space.
You
‘You’re not gonna talk to me?’
Beomgyu was a little shaky while typing, sending the message and hearing the notification across the room.
DO NOT ANSWER BY ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
‘First, I’m trying to do your job. Second, I don’t really have much else to say to you, hyung.’
Beomgyu could see his face through the mirror, a blank expression that resounded in his brain as so Taehyun’s.
You
‘You just…’
DO NOT ANSWER BY ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
‘?’
You
‘It’s hard. It’s really hard for me.’
DO NOT ANSWER BY ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
‘Hah. This is not only about you, you know? Do you think it has only been hard for you?’
Fuck.
You
‘That’s not what I meant.’
DO NOT ANSWER BY ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
‘That’s exactly what you meant. But really, if you want to believe whatever is going on with you, it’s harder for you than anyone else, go ahead. I’m none to belittle your feelings. It would just be nice to be acknowledged, but fuck it.’
Beomgyu was still looking at the screen when he heard the slam of the other’s phone against the table, before getting up and all ready to leave the room. They locked eyes for what he felt were ages and for a split second, he thought that maybe Taehyun was going to say something to him. He didn’t. Instead, just walking behind his manager and leaving him there, sitting and feeling lost like little times he had felt before.
——————————
Time passed slowly. Excruciatingly slow. Even worse knowing that he couldn’t really speak to anyone, supposedly, none knew him, even if a bunch of the people there had worked with him several times. Because, still, he was Kang Taehyun and not Choi Beomgyu and he wished that he could revert that. He wished that he could speak to Taehyun and hug him and explain to him everything that was going on in his head, hating that he was so fucked up that he did him wrong for so long.
He felt dizzy, breathless.
The space started to became narrow and his ears were ringing alarmingly loud, making him feel as if he was falling down an interminable hole. He really needed to get out from he was, he really needed—air. Make himself small, he needed to—
Fuck.
He stood up shakily, the room spinning slowly around him, as if he had drank too much soju and the objects looked very far away, making him collide against a few of them in his walk to the door, knocking them down and making him apologize to the air. Beomgyu struggled with the door, tugging at it with enough force to make himself stumble on his own feet as he tried to get out of there. Desperation was bubbling up his throat at an alarming pace and his breathing was becoming unsteady, shivering running up and down his spine as he walked fast through the hallways of the building without destination, trying to look for a place where he could hide.
A little spark of relief bloomed on his stomach as he found an empty bathroom, two stalls and none around, he rushed into one, locking the door and sitting on the floor. He didn’t notice how hard he was holding his phone until he saw his knuckles becoming white. It took him three attempts to unlock it, tears of frustration pooling around his eyes as he tried to dial. Sounds became slower and he thought he was going to die, like he was being squeezed against the floor with a block of concrete. Seconds dripped so slow that he thought he was going to go insane any point. He couldn’t breath, he felt like choking and he took a hand to his neck, tugging at his shirt, trying to get some air, some space—
“Gyu? Are you there?” His ears caught from a distance and he suddenly gasped, burning air filling his lungs before becoming a loud sob. He kept sobbing until his chest ached for the effort, wasn’t even sure for how long, the only thing keeping him present enough being Yeonjun’s voice in the background and he tried to breath deeply, his heart beating so messily and fast that he felt he was going to pass out.
“I c-can’t do this anymore.” He choked out between sobs. “I can’t.”
“Gyu, please breathe. What happened? Did Taehyun do something to you?”
“NO! That’s the p-problem! He has never d-done anything wrong and I don’t even know how to pretend anymore in front of him or you or anyone!” Another sob wrecked through his body as tears fell down on his pants, leaving dark spots behind. “W-What am I supposed to tell him!? That I was just too scared? That I was a coward? That I felt threatened by him? T-That he seemed to look through me s-so well and that it scared the s-shit out of me!?”
Beomgyu tried to calm himself down, breathing slowly and not able to stop the pathetic whimpers leaving his lips. How pathetic he felt crying his heart out in a bathroom stall, the aftershock of his fading panic attack leaving him like a mess. “I’m just so done with all this! I want m-my life back! I want to go there and eat Soobin’s chips so he will get mad and I want to play my guitar and I want to stop seeing fucking Kang Taehyun before I have to accept that I will n-never be able to find anyone else that makes me feel the same way! That I keep fucking embarrassing myself by writing songs for him that will never see the light of the day! When I go and lie and say that I write songs for my fans when everything is about him and since that first day it has been about him and I just—” He let out a choked sound, brushing off the unstoppable tears from his eyes when he finally could see.
For a moment, he would have rather not do it.
In his rush and panic, he wasn’t able to fully close the stall and through the little space that was left, he could see a figure standing.
“Fuck—” He could see a pair of shoes and he didn’t want to move, not even breathe. He wished he could disappear, feeling like throwing up in panic when he saw the person moving forward and he moved back, in an useless attempt to hide. His blood ran cold when the door opened, letting the light hit his face and blinding his tired, swollen eyes for a moment.
The world seemed to stop when he was able to distinguish the other’s person features, so familiar, so strange at the same time. Beomgyu would have given anything life asked to him, if that meant that he didn’t have to see his own face in that moment; perfectly caked up in make up, hair falling graciously over his shoulders and clothes that were still on point. His face, on the other side, was probably a mess. He didn’t even want to see himself and he tried to hide it in his arm, his phone long forgotten on his hand.
“Are you.. okay?” Beomgyu was trying to keep himself focused, trying to ignore the fact that he didn’t know how long Taehyun had been standing there. “I couldn’t find you, you weren’t back in the waiting room. You scared the shit out of me.”
“Taehyun…”
“Let’s go home, okay? You look terrible. I will drop you there first.”
Beomgyu tried to reach for him, moving slowly, feeling nervous about the way he was looking at him. “Let m-me explain—”
“Beomgyu. Let’s go.” It made him want to disappear, he needed to know what Taehyun had heard, he prayed that he had just heard him crying, that would be easier to explain, it would— “Please breathe, you look like you’re about to pass out. What happened?” He lowered down, until he was looking at Beomgyu directly in the eyes and he really tried to stop the tears that were burning in his eyes once more. “I’m done with your recordings, let’s go home, hyung.” Taehyun didn’t even wait for him to get up, instead gripping at his arms and pulling him up, making him stand in shaky legs. “Help me here, I’m not in my body or I would carry you downstairs.”
It made him smile faintly, watery. Maybe that was what he needed, to scream and cry and have a panic attack to being able to keep going, he felt lighter, in some way. “W-why aren’t you mad at me?”
Taehyun snorted softly, shaking his head. “Don’t get me wrong, I still am, but it doesn’t mean I am going to leave you here. I’m not as heartless as you paint me in your head.”
“It’s not that, I just didn’t know h-how much time passed. Or that you’d look for me.”
“I got to the backstage and someone told me they saw you leaving in a rush, that they called for you but you just left, they seemed worried…” Beomgyu looked at him once more, almost sensing as if he wanted to say something else. “So, wash your face and we can leave. I will pick up your bag.” He left before Beomgyu was able to even open his mouth or think about anything, already missing the sense of calm that seemed to invade him when the other was close. Turning around, he avoided looking at the mirror before opening the water and letting it run for a couple of seconds, hands almost twitching from the coldness before he splashed some on his face, scrunching his nose as he rubbed it a little.
Beomgyu sighed deeply, thinking that he would really love to just faint right there and sleep for an eternity. He was simply done with everything, specially with himself. He just wanted some peace. To be able to lay down and sleep, until everything went away, until—
“You’re awfully quiet, wanna tell me what happened?” Beomgyu sighed, he truly didn’t understand how Taehyun could still worry about him, considering that he had made him upset not even 3 hours before. Beomgyu hated him, him and his heart of fucking gold. It was infuriating that the only thing he wanted to do was kiss him, to see if he finally would shut up for once.
He refrained from it.
“It has just been a couple of rough days, for both of us. I feel like I’m losing what I have left of my mind and I don’t like it.”
“It’s not a nice feeling, but we will endure it.”
“I would love to be as positive as you, you know?” He stepped inside the car while Taehyun held the door for him. “But each second is harder, I really don’t want to fuck everything up more, I think I have done enough.”
“None of this is your fault…” Beomgyu just leaned his head back, resting it and breathing loudly, considering and rethinking his choice of next words.
“But it is. I put us in this situation.” Taehyun looked at him with wide eyes and it was comical to see himself like that. “I…” Words seemed to stop flowing from his brain and he bit his lip for a moment. “I think it would be nice to talk and have dinner together.”
“Civilized?”
“Civilized.”
———
Beomgyu felt like time had went backwards and he was again in the cold December of the prior year, seeing Taehyun cooking in a skilled manner. But this time they were at his place and somehow it didn’t feel like doing something wrong.
Beomgyu had felt that every single time before. Why? None would certainly know.
“We could have just ordered something, you know?”
“You literally take out half of the ingredients when we order food.” Taehyun turned around while moving some vegetables on the pan.
“Not my fault they put so much stuff to them!? I am allowed to not like certain things!” He said back and made Taehyun shake his head in disbelief, Beomgyu thought it was kinda endearing.
“You don’t like anything…” Somehow their eyes met and Beomgyu saw how Taehyun’s eyebrow lifted in his direction and he didn’t stop his mouth from opening to speak.
“I like you though.”
Taehyun stayed silent and Beomgyu had the privilege of sitting in first row to see how his cheeks turned red. “I l-like almost anything…” It made him chuckle, chuckle that soon became a shy laugh blooming into a full one, because really, how many times had he saw Taehyun getting nervous and embarrassed? Way too little.
And it made him feel warm inside, almost as if something were blooming in his chest and he smiled observing with pure love how Taehyun smiled back at him with shyness.
“I’m sorry… for everything.” Beomgyu’s heart started picking on a race as he said those words. “It was never something you did. Or maybe it was everything you did, because you were just... Perfect. You still are and that still scares me a lot. Because I tend to make a lot of mistakes you know? Like this one, I never meant to hurt you, I swear I didn’t mean it, Taehyun.” He felt a little breathless and he could feel his heartbeat in his ears. “I know I was stupid, I know. But it was scary, it was so suddenly that we clicked and everything seemed to work just fucking fine and that always mean that the crash will be horrible—“
“Why did you think it would have crashed in first place?”
“Because it always does. Because it’s always hard to match the agendas and what about when one of us went on tour? And what if we got followed or threatened? I couldn’t do that to you, you were just a rookie past year and I…” Taehyun turned off the stove and turning his full attention to Beomgyu, what did literally nothing to lower his anxiety.
“So… you’re telling me you did it for me? Are you sure of that?” He stayed silent for long seconds.
“No.” It was hard to admit, to swallow that truth. “I did it because I was scared of the consequences. I didn’t want to face or have you face any consequences. I was a coward and I pushed you away before you would start liking me…”
“But it was too late.” Taehyun told him, interrupting him middle sentence. “I fell for you that same day we met on the backstage and maybe it is a little stupid from my side, but what was I supposed to do? To try to stop liking you? I don’t think anyone would be able to stop liking you, hyung.”
“I…”
“I fell in love with you since the first moment and that’s not something that happen to me every single day and I hope you don’t think I go around fucking other people because I don’t. It meant something to me, it meant a lot to me and I thought that it meant something to you too.”
“It did.”
“You didn’t make me feel that, because a little after that you stopped replying to my messages and not answering my calls and you even avoided me in places. That wasn’t making me feel like anything we did meant something to you and it hurt me.” Beomgyu bit his lip for a moment, looking to the side before shaking his head.
“You’re right. But I didn’t mean that…” He stopped once more and Taehyun looked into his eyes with such intensity that it made Beomgyu shiver. His throat felt like closing when he exhaled. “I love you and that scared the shit out of me. I’m sorry.”
“Do you still do it?” Taehyun was walking around the counter and getting closer to Beomgyu, which made him get even more nervous than he already was, if it was possible.
“Do what?” He said, even if he knew the answer to his own question, to gain a few seconds to recompose himself.
“Love me. Do you still love me?” Oh. There it was.
The question.
The nervousness.
The chance to redeem himself.
He didn’t have to think it, not even for a split second.
“Yes.” His mouth was dry like the desert, Taehyun’s eyes was the only thing that was keeping him grounded in that moment.
“Say it.” In which moment he had cupped his face with his hand?
“I love you.” Why has it been such a big deal in first place? There was no sentence easier to say to Taehyun than that one. Because there was no hidden truth or lies or anything and Beomgyu felt like he was shaken by an earthquake.
“I love you too.”
Beomgyu never thought he would hear words more beautiful than those ones and if he had died in that exact moment, he could have died happy. Finally, something had been lifted from his back, like a veil taken away from his eyes. Taehyun hugged him and Beomgyu wished that they would be in their own bodies so he could kiss him like he wanted. Instead, he let himself get embraced on the other’s arms for a long time, just slightly shaking while resting his head on Taehyun’s shoulder.
He pulled behind a little, making Beomgyu look at him, noticing how watery his eyes were. “When we are back to our bodies, I’m gonna kiss you so badly.” It made him chuckle, wetly, rubbing his eyes with his own sleeve while shaking his head.
“You did it anyway yesterday, why so shy now?” His fingers fixed some of his hair behind his ear, letting it run slowly.
“You made me wait a lot of time, so I’m guessing a little more won’t matter, don’t you think so?”
Beomgyu maybe, just maybe agreed with that.
——
“I knew you have written songs about me.” Beomgyu wanted to bury his face on the rice bowl he was eating, whining with his cheeks full of it. “I knew it!”
“Stop it! I might have done it, I might have not!” He surely have, Taehyun didn’t have to know that.
“It’s adorable if you did it.” Taehyun extended some meat across the table to feed Beomgyu on it. He opened his mouth slowly, taking the bite and chewing slowly.
“There is a lot I record at my studio that never sees the light of the day. I might show you one day.” He drank some beer before clearing his throat. “Meanwhile, you can surely listen to certain song in my last album, maybe you will get the reference.”
“So I wasn’t wrong!”
“Shut up Kang! You’re always wrong in my books.” His words didn’t match at all with the wide smile he was carrying in his lips.
“But I can’t be wrong by loving you, hyung.” The most pathetic noise left his lips, heart soaring in content.
“THAT WAS LITERALLY UNFAIR KANG TAEHYUN, YOU CAN’T JUST GO AROUND SAYING STUFF LIKE THAT! I’M JUST A SIMPLE PERSON!”
Taehyun’s melodic laugh was the only thing Beomgyu wanted to hear the rest of his life.
————
They cleaned the dishes together and it was a weird feeling. Like pressing play to a movie you just had put a pause to get a snack, everything falling into place so quickly that it made Beomgyu dizzy.
“I should get going, we will see each other tomorrow, no? I will pick you up very early, so we can go to the venue…”
But he wasn’t going to run away from it again, instead just leaning into the feeling, he wasn’t going to waste this chance. Not again.
“Maybe you should stay here tonight instead. We can leave early and not waste time moving from here to there and stuff…” He clearly could see the doubt on Taehyun’s eyes and how the wires of his brain worked. It made him smile softly, gripping at his arm. “It’s okay, I promise you.”
“I can sleep on the couch.”
“You can sleep with me.” No regrets. “There’s plenty of space in my bed.” Taehyun looked… amused. It wasn’t a bad sign.
“Eager to sleep with me?”
“You could say so. We haven’t slept together in a while…”
“Who’s fault is that?” Beomgyu laughed, shaking his head before smacking Taehyun’s arm.
“Yours. Of course, yeah maybe I blocked you but did you send me letters? Stayed outside my door? Tag me on twitter? Serenade me under my window? Smoke signals? A messenger pigeon?” And he could have kept giving examples if it wasn’t because a pair of wet hands wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer and making him yelp. “Oh w-wow, calm down.”
“My apologies, I should have insisted more. You’re right, I should have sent my trained pigeon, my bad.” If Taehyun was joking, well, didn’t seem like it. He looked too serious for that. “Take me to bed with you.”
“Fine. But no inappropriated touching in bed, huh?”
“Woah, thinking that badly of me already?”
“I know you.”
“You are the one who keeps insisting on taking me to bed and I’m the bad one?” His hands felt like fire on Beomgyu’s waist. “But okay, no inappropiated touching. Got it.” He let go out of him and he’d never accept how weak his legs felt in that moment.
He acted as normal as possible as he changed into other clothes and got in bed, almost at the same time Taehyun did and he sighed as his body relaxed into the mattress. He turned to the side and looked at the other in silence for a couple of moment before dragging himself closer, letting his head to rest on the younger’s shoulder, nuzzling into his neck.
“How long do you think we will be like this…?” Taehyun’s voice was soft, barely over a whisper. Beomgyu moved even closer while closing his eyes.
“Hopefully not longer…? No offense, but I really miss my body.” The sound of the other’s laugh vibrates across Beomgyu’s body.
“Can’t blame you, I miss my own too. Yours is not too bad, but you’re weak as fuck, hyung…” Instead of what he would have done before, he just pressed himself impossibly closer, feeling how Taehyun tried to sneak his arm under him, lifting himself with a whine and letting him to cuddle him.
“I like to get manhandled, so I don’t care.”
“Is this honesty hour or…?”
“Just shut up… We will talk tomorrow. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.” He could hear the smile on his lips. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Beomgyu’s cheeks hurt from how big his smile was.