Chapter Text
Gale waits until the men disappear and he notes they go off in pairs. Rosie must have come back when Bucky did and he slopes off with Ken their fingertips brushing as if they are both so desperate to be alone that they can’t hold it in any longer. Gale knows the feeling.
Harry looks between the two of them quirks his mouth upwards and then mutters something about giving his wife a call and then he slopes off too and so it’s him and John staring at each other next to the fort and then.
“You got a place a guy can go that’s private here Buck?”
Buck nods and then he turns. He knows that this might be the final moment with John before it all goes to shit and maybe the only reason why Bucky is this calm is because people are nearby. To get through all that they have been through, a death march, a prison camp…ejection, to say nothing of John’s beating and near run in with death two blue tickets is the last thing that he needs. He thinks that this might be it, John might take him to their private place round the back of the repair room and tell him thanks but no thanks…or punch him in the jaw…or wish him well on his upcoming wedding…or even tell him that he understands that Buck was possessed with temporary insanity in the prisoner of war camp and that it’s fine now if they carry on as normal.
To be honest Gale doesn’t even know what is worse and he’s had a lot of time to think about the many options presented to him (none of them good) and yet he shoots a look at Bucky and sees that the other man has his head tipped up to the sky and is smiling.
“God I missed this place” he says conversationally. “I didn’t realise it until I was in that camp but this place was really home for a while, strange to think that we’ll be back in the States soon”
“You’ve given any thought to it?” Buck asks. If he keeps Bucky engaged long enough in conversation then maybe he can prolong the part where they have to talk about what was said. He doesn’t know if he can bare it, he’s spent so many nights pacing around the place trying to take his mind of where Bucky is, did he survive? When is he coming home? And then his brain had turned to this conversation, as to what was going to happen when Bucky came home.
To them. To their friendship.
Gale had not been kidding when he had made his promise in that camp. He had not been joking when he had said clear as day that if all Bucky wanted was friendship then he would make that work. Marge was keen on their arrangement, said it brought both her and her gal back home security and besides…being married to Marge was no hardship. Neither of them had wanted children, it was not a conventional marriage and yet Buck knew that they would get along fine. He knew that he would have company, friends, a mind to share things with.
Maybe even a dog.
It was not a bad life. He just…he was just so in love with John Eagan. And now he was thinking of it, thinking of Bucky running rampant through the girls that wanted nothing more to do than to marry a hero coming home he found that he was dreading it. Dreading that there would be some red head hanging off his heartbeat’s arm and Gale would have to stand next to him and make a best man speech. Watch them have children and build a life together and not hate that poor woman for having everything that he had ever wanted.
“Buck?”
He realises that they are now where they used to be, round the back in silence. He knows he’s not answering the question, knows that his panic and his pain and his fear and his…everything…everything that he is feeling must be showing on his face.
John is right in front of him looking at him as though he is insane no doubt and Gale can’t help it, he’s been a nervous wreck these past few weeks everything inside of him shredded to resemble lettuce and he doesn’t know how to deal with it.
He suddenly can’t help himself. He launches himself at John wrapping both arms around him burrowing his face into that neck and full on sobbing. He can’t help it he’s just…he doesn’t know what to do with himself. He’s…he’s so in love that…
He half expects to be pushed off and thrown to the ground, would probably take the beating that came after too. If Bucky throws him off now then he is done, he’s going to the ground never to get back up again. Like in the barracks when he thought that he was never going to see those eyes again and he knew that it would destroy him.
But Bucky doesn’t throw him off in disgust, doesn’t pat him on the back awkwardly as one man might do for their hysterical friend in 1945. Instead he hauls him closer, wraps both arms around him and says sadly.
“Oh Gale”
Before Gale can say anything or even attempt to say anything John has dragged him backwards so that they are sat on the little wooden crates that he swears were there years ago and he drags Gale onto his lap one leg either side of his hips and he lets Gale burrow his head into his neck wet eyes pressed against warm skin as he finally stops crying.
A part of him thinks that if he stays here very quiet then maybe John will let him stay here. If he’s quiet, his breaths now down to little shuddering gasps then maybe he can stave off this conversation. If he can put off the moment where his heart is surely going to get blown into pieces just a little bit longer, if he can bask just for a minute, a second, a heartbeat, longer in the warmth that is John Eagan then like the greedy man that he is Gale Cleven is going to take it both hands outstretched and be thankful for it.
But he knows that, that is never going to happen. This is a working Air Force base and anyone can come round the corner and see them and more to the point he’s put on all of the weight that he has lost during those months of imprisonment (perks of being somewhere that actually serves real hot food) and he knows that he is…well…heavy.
So he slips off feet landing on the ground.
Bucky pouts at him.
“Why’d you gotta do that?” he says and Buck wipes his eyes and his face with the back of his sleeve letting the course fabric rub at his skin.
“You know why.”
“No I don’t…look Gale” he leans forwards and Buck swallows because this…this is it…this is where his world ends and you will stand here and take it Cleven. You owe him this much.
“I can admit…I didn’t handle it well back in the Stalag. I mean dumping it on you that I had overheard you and all that, I mentioned it to Alex…he knows way more than he lets on by the way…and he called me a colossal fucking idiot and maybe he was right I just…I….”
“I get that you don’t feel the same way” Gale interjects. He plasters on what he is sure is the fakest smile that he can muster and he prays that it is enough to keep John’s friendship.
“I do John and…and I know that you don’t…I know that you don’t want that with me and you don’t feel the same way and I understand and…and one word from you and I will go and you will never see me again and that’s fine if that’s what you want but…please…” he folds down his lips between his teeth and his stomach swoops as he realises that he really isn’t too proud to beg…
“I want to stay friends with you John, I know that I can’t have anything else and that’s fine—”
It’s really not but you get the point.
“—But I want to be your friend. And I meant what I said when I confessed to you, I am…I will stand by your side for as long as you want me and if that’s when you get married and when you have children then I will do that with a smile on my face and when I wish you the whole world know I mean it. I am—”
John puts his hand up and Gale falls silent words choking in his throat.
He closes his eyes. The last time he wants to see John’s face he wants it to be free of pity or anger or hate.
This is the final moment that he has before his execution, before John Eagan does what the Germans could never do.
He waits for the execution.
“Buck…who says I don’t feel the same way?”
Wait?
What?
He snaps his eyes open and John is looking at him face a picture of concern.
“I don’t…”
“Buck I thought it was pretty fucking obvious that I was head over heels in love with you before we left the States?”
For a second he stares at Bucky uncomprehendingly. He thinks from a far away distance that Hitler could come back from the dead stroll into Thorpe’s Abbott and ask him for the time and he wouldn’t be able to look away from Bucky’s face right now.
“You…you feel the same way? You…you love me?”
“Yes” Bucky says and he’s smiling now big and bold and beautiful and suddenly Gale can breathe again, he can breathe in the air and feel the sun on his skin and hear the birds sing and my God it’s glorious!
Bucky reaches out and with a giggle that he cannot believe comes from his lips he finds that he is back in John’s lap and his hands are wrapped around his face their foreheads resting against each other. His heart feels lighter than it has been since he first saw Bucky walk through those gates and he knew that he was still alive.
John reaches out and smooths his hair back as if he was the prettiest dame in the world and then.
“I love you Gale Cleven, have loved you, still love you, will always love you. And I don’t know what kind of good thing I did in having you love me back but you do and I…I love you. and now…now I am going to kiss you and keep you and never let you go.”
“For richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, to honour and obey until death do us part?”
He means it as a joke but Bucky’s face is completely serious.
“Why not?” he asks and before Gale can comment on what that means, he surges forwards and drags him into the best kiss of his entire life, he moans his mouth opening and Bucky slips his tongue in it where he belongs and the last coherent thought that Gale has is that kissing John…it’s better than flying.
Ken watches them and then rolls his eyes shoving his hands in his pocket and turning back to the barracks. He thinks that just this once he can leave the wheel until the morning. Robert was right when he said it could wait. They have time now.
Robbie is half naked when he walks in kicking off his boots and Ken slides right up beside him and thanks God that this man has his own room.
“Buck and Bucky?”
“Oh yeah”
“Harry owes me thirty bucks. He thought that Gale’s girl would have to spell it out for them. Or is she even his girl now?”
“I don’t know. Do you care?”
Ken sees Robbie eye him for a second and then smirks.
“No come to bed”
“I have to do my worksheets for tomorrow yet”
“You can do them in here” Robbie says lifting the covers so half his body is exposed. Ken drops his pencil.
Damn this man.
“Go on then” he says and he lets himself be dragged to bed.
It’s no small thing this for them, him, Robbie, Harry, Buck, Bucky.
Peace.
Happiness.
And it’s all there’s. Their hard fought happiness.
And nobody or nothing is gonna take if from them ever again.