Chapter Text
Thancred is Lahabrea. She had seen the signs, knew something was wrong, but she never spoke to anyone about her worry. She had noticed the black crystal around his neck last time she had been with him. It wasn’t Thancred she had been with that night in the kitchen, it was Lahabrea, and her hands won’t stop shaking as her stomach churns. Y’shtola notices how pale the miqo’te has become and checks her over quickly. “Leeja?” Minfilia notices something wrong. The hyuran woman knows how close Leeja and Thancred have become, and though it hurt her to her own core to know the truth, she can’t imagine what is currently going through Leeja’s mind. So when no one else’s voice makes it through to her, Minfilia’s does and she looks up at the blonde as tears sting the corners of her eyes. Minfilia talks, but Leeja’s mind spirals and sets her in a panic attack that finally makes her legs give out on her and her vision turns black.
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Her hand looks small in his. Leeja sits next to the bed Thancred rests in. She has done what she promised – she saved him from the clutches of the Ascian, but it came at a cost of initially her own life and now she waits for him to open his eyes. She’s so lost in thought that she does not realise he’s watching her until her gives her hand a gentle squeeze, forcing her to look up. “Thancred!” She gasps, relief flooding her body. He gives her a weak, tired smile and nods, and it’s all she can do not to hug him tightly. Instead, he closes his hand around her own and tears sting her eyes.
“How long have you been sat here?” He mumbles.
“Too damn long, if I’m being honest. I’ve been here every day since the healers and Y’shtola freed me from bed rest” she admits to him as he frowns. It takes him a moment to notice the black eye, the cuts and wounds to her skin, the burn peeking out under her sleeve.
“What happened?” He asks her. She shakes her head and gives him a shaky smile.
“Nothing you need to concern yourself over. Right now, you need rest. I’ll heal in time” she promises him. He wants to protest, but she hold her heavily bandaged hand up to stop him.
“Lahabrea did this to you, didn’t he?” Her ears pin back, and it’s all he needs to know.
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Her hand looks small in his as leads her away from the faces who both judge and want to greet her. As ever, he manages to find her in location – as if following an invisible string, and rescues her from harm. There are many gentlemen who’s attention she has caught, but none of them compare to the man in front of her, holding her hand tightly and refusing to let go. He struggles to trust anyone with her safety and it shows as he places his free hand on her waist. It’s warm, reassuring. She feels safe with him there, no matter the consequences. They had been warned many a time from Y’shtola, but there were some who had encourage their romantic pursuits. Regardless, even they do nothing of the sort, he keeps his promise of keeping her safe.
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Her hand is freezing and pale in his. The Light poisoning has made her weak and frail, and she is too proud to tell anyone, though he can see it. He has steadily watched her condition worsen, and his fear of her dying is too great to ignore. Ryne does her best to manage the symptoms but it isn’t enough. He feels like a failure, where the others can help heal her wounds and manage her symptoms, he cannot. And it angers him. He promised to keep her safe, to fight by her side and now? He isn’t so sure he can keep his promise. “You’re nice and warm” she murmurs softly as she places another cold hand over his, desperate for warmth. They need to show they are willing to assist, yet Thancred knows Leeja won’t make it the rest of the way if she doesn’t get to rest before. He speaks up about it and they are given a pass to rest.
As they sit in the cave, Thancred takes the time to make sure Leeja is comfortable and as warm as possible. She falls asleep shortly after getting settled and Thancred’s hand immediately goes to her hair as he gently runs his fingers through the bright white and gold locks that had completely changed her appearance. They feel different to the normally soft and fluffy hair that she takes such time to perfect every day. She shivers violently and he finds a blanket from her bag and wraps it around her. It was going to be a long road to her recovery should she survive what Emet-Selch has in store for her.
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Her hand is ripped out of his. The Endsinger is throwing whatever attacks she can, and she is not making it easy for them, but when she opens a black hole and makes the attempt of sending everyone through it to kill them all, Thancred notices Leeja barely standing her ground as she pulls out the button from her bag. She looks up at him, with a sad smile, and mouths the words “my turn”, and his mind is in a state of panic. He knows what those words mean, especially in a place like this. He tries to call out to her, but the words are lost in the sound of the wind and before he can try again, they’re back on the ship, trying to catch their breath. Thancred wants to chase after Leeja, to fight by her side and make sure she makes it out alive. And he can’t move. He can hear the outrage around him from the rest of the Scions, but he cannot lend his voice to the cacophony of sound. He trusts Leeja. He knows she can survive, but something inside him does not. For the first time since Amaurot, he isn’t sure of the outcome. All he can do is wait and pray.
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It’s getting cold, and Leeja can’t feel her hands any longer. Her body aches, she’s laying in a pool of her own blood as her memories flash through her mind. It goes silent as Zenos viator Galvus takes his final breath. Tears sting at her eyes as she says a silent goodbye, knowing that, despite saving the star and everything in creation, she will never see those she loves again. Her heart aches at the thought of Thancred telling her family she is gone, lost to the end of creation and never to return. The tears fall, but she cannot feel them. She can no longer hear, the final feeling is the faded warmth and safety of Thancred’s hand tightly in hers and it gets too much. She can no longer keep her eyes open and her body finally has enough as she mouths a single goodbye as she finally falls into the deep abyss of death.
Thancred sits silently on the ground as everyone tries to make plans on retracing their steps to find their missing miqo’te. He wants to shout, wants to tell them to just stop and to trust in Leeja, but the words don’t come to him any time soon. He lets out a sigh, a deep, weary sigh and rubs his face just as the familiar sound of a teleport reaches everyone's ears. “Finally!” Alisaie cries, running out of the ship to meet Leeja, only for her scream to make Thancred’s blood run cold as he sprints from the ship. He finds Alisaie hunched over, crying, and begging for the body on the floor to wake up. As he walks closer, he spots the red – either dyed or just blood – and moves the red mage out of the way. His eyes widen in fear and as carefully as he can, lifts the cold and broken body of Leeja to carry back inside as the others begin to panic. He lays her on the stretcher and stays by her side, saying nothing and watching. His hands – no his body – are shaking, and as he reaches down to hold her hand, he feels the shattered bones. Her hand looks small in his, and will never be the same again.
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Her hand looks small in his. Thancred’s mind is malms away as he stares down at it, while Leeja watches him curiously. She lifts her hand and gently strokes along his wrist, palm and fingers with her own and when her actions didn’t pull him from his thoughts, she lifts her hand to his cheek. “Gil for your thoughts, love?” She asks quietly, wincing a little as speaking is still painful from the nasty bite from Zenos and her voice surprises him.
“Ah, don’t mind me” he tells her, just as quiet as she.
“Thancred, please, talk to me” she urges him. “If something is wrong… If I’ve done something…”
“You’ve done nothing wrong” he answers quickly, coming off a little colder than he means to and making her flinch. In truth, she knows why his behaviour is currently the way it is. In a moment of clarity, with her mind fog free and clear, she had told him everything that happened after she sent them away. Everything that happened with Zenos. “I apologise, I didn’t mean for it to come across like that” he says softly. She keeps her hand on his cheek as turns to plant a kiss against her palm before resting his hand over hers.
“Love…” She purrs softly at the action. “Are you sure you’re not mad at me?”
“I cannot be mad at you for something you did not ask for. You have saved the star countless times over and you managed to quell two threats in one day. How could I possibly be mad at you? You, my darling, are alive and on the mend, that is all I care about” he tells her. She painfully shuffles closer to him.
“I love you. Thank you for staying by my side” she murmurs, lacing her fingers between his.
“And I you, to the unknown and beyond.”