Chapter Text
The next days pass for Kaveh in a blur. He’s avoiding Al-Haitham, desperate to avoid Al-Haitham’s knowing gaze, that would sniff out his anxiety and fear that pools in his stomach. Kaveh hides in his office long after classes end, watching as his coworkers slowly file out of the entrance through the window. The emptiness eats at him, knowing he just left his roommate there, confused and vulnerable, after his confession.
He can see his and Al-Haitham’s shared home from his office window, looking like a safe haven away from the storm brewing inside of his office. Hassan’s scent lingers everywhere, clogging his nostrils until he suffocates. He hasn’t stopped vomiting each day that he enters the room, reminded of the awful deed he had done to protect himself. He tries to outrun the feeling by throwing himself into work, but Hassan is in all of his classes, reminding him of what happened. His cruel smile haunts Kaveh's sleep. He gazes at his reflection in the window, seeing the shell of himself stare back. The circles under his eyes make him look like a walking corpse, barely alive. He's lost enough weight within this week to be worrying, but no one dares say a word to him.
He lays his head on his hands, sighing. Al-Haitham has tried to apologize to Kaveh for his direct confession, but Kaveh refuses to hear it. Mainly because he doesn’t want Al-Haitham to apologize to him for his feelings, not when Kaveh wants to reciprocate so badly. His heart beats wildly at the thought. Oh, how he wants to melt into Al-Haitham's arms, letting the alpha claim him as his own. He tampers down that dream, letting reality take hold once again. There's no dreaming for a secret Omega like him. Only despair, pooling in his gut, as he hears Al-Haitham's confession ringing in his ears over and over.
A knock at the door makes Kaveh peek through his arms. “Come in…” he says, nervously. The familiar scent of Hassan wafts through the doors, and Kaveh stiffens, a cold feeling running down his spine.
“Hello, professor,” Hassan addresses him, a slight smile curling on his lips. Kaveh just looks at him, too scared to move. His heart beats against his ribcage, threatening to burst out of his chest from fear.
“I’ve been longing for you for days…” he whispers, walking around to stand behind Kaveh, touching his shoulders. Kaveh tenses as Hassan’s fingers feather over his scent glands. He feels disgusted to be coated by Hassan's scent, someone who he would never want to be his mate. He longs for Al-Haitham once more in this moment, closing his eyes.
“You smell so fearful,” Hassan observes. “I love it.”
“I’m not…” Kaveh chokes out, not able to finish his sentence as Hassan grabs his hair. Hassan's grip is painful, dragging Kaveh back into his body. He wants to disassociate, imagining Al-Haitham bursting in to save him from this awful reality.
He silently sends a prayer to the Archons for help, but no one answers.
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Kaveh stumbles home late, feeling the alpha’s scent lingering all over his skin. He opens the door of the house slowly, careful not to make any noise.
“Where have you been, Senior?” Al-Haitham asks from the couch. Kaveh jumps, swinging around to face him. Guilt flits across his face, knowing he can't hide the shameful deed that's been done to him. He hates lying, especially to Al-Haitham, but once again, self preservation kicks in.
“At work?” he replies, though his tone comes out in the form of a question. He winces internally at the uncertainty in his own voice.
“Really?” Al-Haitham says, stalking over to him. “Because you smell like a brothel.” Kaveh can see the anger simmering in his teal eyes. He curses internally, desperately trying to come up with a lie.
“I was just…out,” he says vaguely, pushing past Al-Haitham. Al-Haitham grabs his arm, stopping him. His grip is tight on Kaveh's arm, almost painful. But Kaveh can only breathe a sigh of relief, relishing his touch despite the circumstances. It feels much better than the way Hassan manhandled him like a toy. The cracks are showing, and he knows Al-Haitham can see right through him.
“Out?” Al-Haitham growls, his scent smothering Kaveh as he pulls him close. “What alpha have you been fooling around with?” Kaveh looks up into his eyes, feeling like he's going to break into a million pieces under that stare.
“No one,” Kaveh replies, staring at his feet. He can feel the anxiety bubbling as Al-Haitham stares intently at him. The silence seems to stretch for eternity, before Al-Haitham speaks again.
“So you’ve been ignoring me for someone else?” Al-Haitham asks flatly, but Kaveh can hear something else in his tone. Seething jealousy, barely conspicuous in his voice. Sadness, cutting deep because Kaveh betrayed him. A person that didn’t know Al-Haitham as well as Kaveh wouldn’t pick up on it.
“You should have told me,” Al-Haitham continues, his voice losing its edge. Kaveh feels the guilt settle over him, wanting Al-Haitham to be angry. Angry, frustrated, even abusive...anything but that disappointed look on his face, cutting Kaveh straight to his core.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, letting Al-Haitham believe the worst. The look in Al-Haitham’s eyes is gut wrenching, and Kaveh feels the tears start to gather at the corner of his eyes.
“I never…meant for this to happen,” he manages to get out. Al-Haitham drops his hand from Kaveh’s arm, leaving him standing in the foyer by himself. He lets the tears run down his face, hot and salty.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers to no one. The empty space Al-Haitham left doesn’t answer.