Chapter Text
Grace’s wedding, if nothing else, sounds like a damn good time. It humanizes Louis to Daniel. Watching him go on and on about his baby sister’s wedding with a small, adoring smile on his face. The expression reminds Daniel of Lestat in a way that doesn’t make his heart twist. It’s almost endearing, watching a decades-old vampire get so happy over something that had occurred during their first lifetime.
“Paul and I danced. It was the happiest I’d seen him in years. Grace, of course, was beautiful.” Louis looks like he’s caught in a memory. Eyes down on the floor, reminiscing. “Levi loved her so much that she glowed with it. Even my mama looked like she was enjoying herself…”
Then, everything goes to complete and utter hell.
Daniel hadn’t been expecting it, the sudden change in Louis. The vampire’s face crumbles and he looks like he’s debating on whether or not to continue. There’s a deep-rooted sadness present there. A sense of grief that Daniel honestly doesn’t know what to do with.
“After everyone else had left… Minutes to sunrise, Paul and I climbed up on the roof,” Louis’ voice changes when he speaks those words. It drops and becomes cagey in a way that is totally opposite to the levity Louis had possessed mere moments ago. “We spoke. He said something about how much food he’d eaten and I said something about his buttons popping off like cannonballs.”
Whatever this is, whatever tragedy occurred at this wedding, Daniel doesn’t know and it leaves him reeling. Lestat never told him of this and why would he? This is part of Louis’ story, not Lestat’s. Not everything he’s going to hear throughout this interview is something he already knows because no matter how close Louis and Lestat were back then, they could never get inside each other’s heads. They don’t truly know what the other thought and felt. They have no clue which moments were most important to the other. Their versions of the same time period will be the same broad strokes with different beats and Daniel would do well to remember that. Being blindsided and unprepared for new information won’t do him any damn good.
“He asked me about Lestat and told me I should be the one who married next.” Louis chuckles, it’s an airy, hollow thing. “He said he loved me,” Louis’ lips pursed and Daniel can see the blood tears beginning to line his eyes. “Then he walked off the roof.”
Daniel lets out the smallest, quietest of gasps. He knows Louis will be able to hear it anyway.
Daniel was told that Paul died, of course. He’s even been told that Louis questioned whether Lestat was involved in it. The nature of the death though—the setting of it? It’s entirely new information for Daniel.
Louis stands from his seat and walks out to the balcony that had become available to him once night fell. Daniel is left staring at his back in shock.
He can’t imagine it. Losing anyone like that would be difficult but a sibling? Someone born to be your eternal companion on this Earth. A person who is meant to be with you every step of the way—when even parents, spouses, and children cannot be. Daniel has only ever had one experience close to it.
The interviewer unplugs his microphone and for the moment, stops the recording. What is about to be said need never be repeated or rehashed. It is for him and Louis alone. As well as Armand, of course. Daniel would be surprised if that little shit wasn’t listening in on this conversation. Nevertheless, Daniel stands and walks out to the balcony so that he might stand beside Louis.
For a moment, neither of them says a thing. They simply stand there in silence. Not comfortable, exactly, but not unbearable either. He and Louis are becoming acquainted with each other. In any other moment besides this one, Daniel would be angry about that.
“I’m an only child,” Daniel starts and Louis turns away from the city lights in front of him to look Daniel in the face. Daniel, for his part, keeps his eyes on the lights. He cannot bear to look at Louis while he says this. “I never really had any family until Alice and my girls. Now Alice and I might not have worked out, but we never stopped loving each other. It is only the nature of that love that changed. She’s more like an annoying little sister to me now.”
Out of the corner of his eye, Daniel sees Louis begin to smile. This is a bonding moment between them, he realizes. Daniel tries not to think about that too much. “I realized what she was to me on the worst night of my life. December 12th, 1996. She got into an accident. Too much snow on the roads, I think. Both my girls were in the car with her.”
Daniel hears a sharp intake of breath at his sides and feels his hands begin to shake a bit harder than normal. It’s been twenty-eight years and still, this is hard to talk about. “Alice’s arm was twisted the wrong way around. They thought they’d have to amputate it. Marcella, my Mars, only had a concussion. She was the luckiest of them all. But Jade…”
Daniel chokes up, hands reaching out to grip the banister in front of him. Oddly, unexpectedly, he feels a firm hand placed on his shoulder. It would have made him tense normally, but in this moment Louis feels something like a friend. He never will be, Daniel knows, but the allusion is nice. Alice had always theorized that he and Louis would get along.
“Jade was comatose. Internal bleeding, the whole nine yards. Her heart stopped for over a minute on the surgery table. I’ve never felt such…”
Daniel doesn’t need to continue. He knows damn well that Louis has experienced the indescribable feeling of a parent losing their child. The hand on his shoulder grips a bit tighter.
“Is she okay?” Louis asks quietly. Slightly choked up.
“Now, yeah. But the doctors didn’t think she’d be. They thought… damn near guaranteed that she’d never wake up from her coma. But she’s strong, my Jade. She woke up a week later, speaking about how an angel’s voice in her head had guided her back to consciousness.”
Daniel almost feels bad for withholding in this moment of connection and honesty. Maybe, perhaps, if it had been any other event, Daniel would be a bit more truthful. But he knows damn well that he’s a dead man if Louis learns that there had been no angel in Jade’s head, but a vampire trying desperately to ensure that he didn’t lose another daughter…
He’d saved Jade like he couldn’t save her.
Louis would snap, no doubt about it. Daniel wouldn’t even particularly blame him, even if the fault does not truly lie with himself or Lestat.
“They’re all okay then?” Louis inquires, sounding like he genuinely cares. Daniel must be losing his damn mind.
“Yeah, yeah… they’re good. Safe and happy and alive for me to love. I cannot imagine…” Daniel shakes his head. Once again, he knows that Louis understands the words that cannot be said. “I don’t envy you. Loss it… has to compound for someone like you.”
Daniel is certain that it does. He’s seen Lestat mourn. Somedays Nicki is the worst wound. Somedays it’s whatever the hell he had with Armand and Louis. Most days it’s Claudia. He imagines it’s very much the same for Louis.
“I’ve watched people die over and over and over again…” Louis speaks, quiet and pained. “It never gets any easier.”
Daniel doesn’t respond to that. Louis says those words into the void. He thinks that may be for the best.
“I don’t miss the sun,” Louis remarks, looking out at the moon, “the reminders it carries.”
Daniel kind of feels his stomach drop out because he’s no regular journalist. Not for Louis. He knows of Claudia. He knows how she died. And he’s been with Lestat long enough to know when she’s being mentioned. There’s just a certain feeling in the air. A despair which Daniel has never felt, though he’d come close the day that Jade’s heart stopped. He knows the feeling of losing a daughter, but she hadn’t been gone long enough for him to know the feeling of mourning one. He thanks a God he doesn’t believe in for that every damn day of his life.
“I think I’m ready to go back to the interview now,” Louis says, nodding to himself in a way that makes him look more fragile than he is. “No point in dwelling.”
Daniel doesn’t bother saying that all this interview is, is an opportunity for Louis to dwell. Rather, he simply says, “Okay,” and then walks back to his seat to restart the recording and plug in the microphone.
Louis follows behind, retaking his spot on the couch with a forced calmness. “Paul’s funeral—” he starts, “Was a pain like I’d never experienced at the time. My mama blamed me for his death, alienated me… Grace was kind and that just made it even worse. I didn’t feel deserving of kindness. I felt like a curse or an omen. Like my mama’s words were true.”
It is only Daniel’s newfound sympathy for Louis that keeps him quiet in this moment. Perhaps, if he’s feeling particularly dickish, he’ll bring up that omen comment at a later date. But now, even the thought that he could do that makes Daniel feel a little ill.
“Lestat seized this agony, this weakness, and he used it to draw me in. ‘Come to me, come to me…’ The sound of his voice sounded like a damn chorus in my head. An enticing one too.”
“Did you follow his voice?” Daniel asks.
“No,” Louis responds. “Not because I didn’t want to. It was something like pride, I think. Or maybe it was guilt. My feelings for him were a sin after all. I could not bear the thought of going to Lestat mere moments after my mama accused me of pushing my brother to suicide. I—” Louis pauses for a moment, shifting slightly in his seat. “I went to Ms. Lily instead.”
Daniel has a bad feeling about this. Something similar to dread. He’d bet his damn life that Lily wouldn’t be alive to greet Louis. And he’d bet his marriage that his husband was the reason.
“Ms. Lily wasn’t there…” Louis starts, and if there was any doubt left in Daniel about his assumptions, it’s gone now.
“Lestat killed her, didn’t he?”
“Yes,” Louis says and Daniel almost wants to give himself a round of applause because he’s always fucking right.
“His voice was still ringing in my head like a goddamn bell. I wanted to go to him. Truly, I did. But I also had a different wish. A wish to follow Paul to the grave…”
Now this, Daniel knows. Lestat had made a point during their original interview to speak about how much of a danger Louis was to himself at the point when he was turned. He made a point to paint it as him saving Louis, giving him another chance at life. Giving him his first real chance at love.
Daniel still hasn’t decided whether he believes that or not.
“I went to the church. Screaming to the Father about how the Devil was in New Orleans. I confessed my sins, each and every one. From being a pimp, to a drunk, to letting down my brother, to lying down with a man. I said it all,” Louis informs him. “I said the devil had his roots in me, that I could hear nothing but his voice and his words. I said—I said that I wanted to die. And not ten seconds later Father Matthias was pulled from the box and Lestat was feeding from him.”
Daniel doesn’t even believe in God and that feels a little sacrilegious. To Lestat though, that was probably all in good fun. Daniel’s husband has religious trauma practically flowing out of his ears. The opportunity to snack on some priests to gain the love of his life probably appealed to him greatly. Like he was laughing in the face of God, or something. It’s an insane notion, but for all his love for him, Daniel has never claimed that his husband is sane.
“I stabbed Lestat, and he said words that I can barely recall, something about God and the Priest being unworthy—”
‘Sounds about right,’ Daniel thinks.
“And then he threw me into the pews and put his fist through another father’s skull,” Louis recalls. Daniel knows the story vividly. Lestat had practically bragged about it. “He wiped the blood off his mouth, and shed his coat. Then he walked towards me. He was pleading with me. Begging me to join him. To love him…”
Again, Daniel knows this part of the story. Knows the speech too. Lestat has every goddamn word of it memorized. Daniel does too. It feels like something glaring in his mind, sometimes. A reminder that Louis is and always will be the love of Lestat’s life.
Not to say that Lestat hasn’t waxed poetic to him, because he has. Lestat’s prose could put Shakespeare to shame. Nevertheless, the depth of feeling conveyed in that one speech… The feeling conveyed in everything Lestat has ever said to or about Louis is unparalleled. No love has ever compared or ever will. That, at the very least, Daniel is completely resigned to.
—-----------------
August 5, 1973 - New York City
In the weeks and months following the interview, Daniel gains a shadow. Every once in a while, Lestat just shows up. Be it at a coffee shop, a drug den, a bar, or his fucking apartment. He just pops up wherever Daniel is and stays. Silent, most times. He’s different than he was when they first met. Lestat doesn’t bother to hide the pain and sorrow that plagues him from Daniel. There would be no use. Daniel knows more about Lestat than anyone else alive outside of maybe Armand. Even not knowing his personality well, Daniel knows his past and his feelings enough to be able to see when Lestat is hiding behind a barrier. He thinks that perhaps that is why Lestat sticks to him. Maybe he makes him feel free.
Daniel legitimately came home to Lestat standing outside of his door one night, simply waiting for Daniel to arrive. It was creepy as all hell, and Daniel had to snort a bump or two of cocaine to take the edge off. Lestat looked like he wanted some as well. Looked like he had ghosts he needed to forget. In his high state, Daniel had offered him some. Lestat didn’t deny his want, simply stating that the drug wouldn’t affect him in its current state. Daniel didn’t question it in the moment, and he kicked himself for it every day. If he is going to have a vampire following him around all the time, he might as well know a bit more about their quirks.
Surprisingly enough, he’s sober when he gets the balls to mention it. “Lestat?” He starts. They’re just lounging in his apartment, Daniel trying to write something to send off to the shitty little paper he writes for as a day job. Lestat lying on the floor and staring up at the ceiling like the dramatic asshole he is. Daniel very pointedly doesn’t think about how beautiful his golden hair looks when splayed against the ground.
“Oui?” Lestat responds. His voice is still deep and French and fuckable. Daniel doesn’t think about that either.
“Why can’t cocaine affect you?”
Lestat hums, turning his head to look at Daniel. “An odd choice of topic.”
“At least it is a topic,” Daniel counters, setting his pen down. “You tell me you’re a vampire, blab your whole life story, and then start following me around like a damn duckling yet we hardly speak.” Daniel raises a brow at Lestat. “If you’re going to stick around at least talk a bit, man.”
“You may be the first person in my life who has ever asked me to make myself more noticeable,” Lestat says. There is a shit ton of layers to that statement. Daniel doesn’t bother getting into it.
“You’re already plenty noticeable,” Daniel counters because even though he doesn’t want to get into it, he can’t help digging at the self-deprecation. “But you’re full of gloom and despair and you hover around and I’m just… tell me something. It doesn’t have to be about cocaine. It could be why the hell you’re still here. I’ve been wondering that too.”
Lestat looks at him. Really looks at him and Daniel feels a bit too exposed. He feels like Lestat is reading every thought in his mind. Even the ones Daniel doesn’t want to admit are floating around in there. Like how even Lestat’s silent presence is lovely because the man himself is lovely. Like how he occasionally fears that just being near the bastard is enough for Daniel to want to do a whole lot more than just fuck him.
“You make things quiet,” Lestat answers, and Daniel’s brows furrow because that’s a bit cryptic. Though he is grateful that Lestat didn’t mention Daniel’s unfailing desire to lick up the vampire’s no doubt wonderous abs. God, he needs to get himself in check.
“What do I make quiet?”
Lestat huffs, rolling his eyes. “For a journalist, you think you’d be better at language.”
“Oh, fuck off—”
“The grief,” Lestat interrupts. “The pain of… her. Louis, Armand, Gabrielle, Nicki,” Lestat presses a slightly trembling hand over his heart, still lying on the floor. “That pain is with me always. You don’t remove it but you dull it. With every beat of your heart, the torment eases. Until I focus on nothing but the sound of your life. It soothes me.” Lestat’s fingers start tapping, a steady rhythm. Daniel realizes with a start that Lestat is tapping out the beat of his heart.
He’s flabbergasted, appalled, and so warm that he almost feels like drowning in it. He checks his pulse in his wrist, hoping for his own sanity that he was wrong.
He wasn’t.
“Uhm…” Daniel gulps. Pushing down the panic and feelings he would rather not name. “Whenever you want—” Daniel pauses and starts, trying to find the right words. “You’re welcome here. Whenever you need it to be quiet. Just talk to me every once in a while, yeah? Your silence is freaking me out.”
Lestat cracks a small smile, looking the happiest Daniel has seen him since the day they met. “Thank you, mon ami.”
Daniel’s heart almost stutters at that. He and Lestat both ignore it. They’re both getting very good at ignoring whatever the hell is happening with Daniel. “No problem. But also, if you’re going to keep coming around, maybe consider paying some rent. Your rich ass can afford it.”
Lestat chuckles. “What, so you have more drug money?” He says it jokingly, and Daniel takes it that way. He knows that Lestat doesn’t begrudge him for his vices. He’d have his own if he could.
“You bastard,” Daniel snarks, a teasing grin tugging at his lips. “Get your ass up off my floor, I’m kicking you out.”
Lestat laughs so hard that Daniel can’t help but laugh with him. It’s the highest he’s ever felt without a drug.
—-----------------
June 14, 2022 - Dubai
Louis ends his recount of his turning. Stating that he and Lestat stayed in the church together, their hearts beating loud in their ears, laying in throes of increasing wonder. It would make Daniel angry if he wasn’t feeling so soft on Louis tonight. The heart is his and Lestat’s thing. It always has been. Always will be. Lestat’s love for his heart and the way it beats is the very foundation of Daniel’s love for him. He should feel possessive. He should feel jealous.
As is, he’s tired and old and feeling far too much sympathy for the enemy. He lets it go and for the first time, it doesn’t feel like a battle lost. Once again, as he walks to bed, he finds himself wondering about Armand. Did he go through this too? This transition from jealousy and possessiveness to just utter acceptance? From what he knows about Armand, Daniel would guess no. Armand won’t rest a day on this Earth until Lestat loves him back. Until Louis loves him enough to make him forget that Lestat doesn’t love him back.
As he lies down in bed, Daniel reminds himself to get on ordering that gift basket. The poor bastard deserves it.
A vibration from his phone pulls Daniel away from that thought. Daniel grabs the phone from his nightstand, looking at the notification. An image from Jade. Seeing her name after the story he’d told earlier today almost makes him choke up. He types in his overly complicated password and opens up the text, his heart overflowing with love when he sees the image that had been sent.
It’s Lestat. The love of his damn life and Jade’s third parent, holding his grandson on his lap as they watch WALL-E together. The picture comes with a quick little text as well.
‘We wanted to make sure dad wasn’t too sad with you gone. He and Leslie are having a blast, as always. Miss you!’
Lestat looks so content in the picture. So domestic and happy, staring down at Leslie with eyes full of adoration while the boy looks at the movie in wonder. Daniel can’t help but remember when he and Lestat used to do something similar with Jade and Mars. Spending family time together watching things like The Little Mermaid and The Jungle Book. Daniel’s love for Lestat, and for the family they created, feels like it’s growing almost exponentially in that moment. He longs to be there too. To hold Leslie between himself and Lestat while Jade sits near Lestat as she always does. Maybe Alice and Mars would come too. They could have the whole family there—Daniel’s whole heart.
Daniel types out a quick response to Jade before opening up his and Lestat’s text thread. He types out something quick and simple. Something that can’t even begin to encapsulate how much Daniel misses him. How much he longs to be with him. How much he adores him.
‘I love you, baby.’
Quick, simple, and straight to the point. That’s the bit that matters the most anyway. Not fifteen seconds later, Daniel’s phone vibrates again, and he knows what Lestat’s response will be before he ever even opens it.
‘Je t’aime, mon coeur.’