Chapter Text
Mark P.O.V
This was a terrible idea.
Mark knew that.
Jason’s trial was long over, the testimonies from Mark, the present police and finally Jack himself was more than enough to convince the jury of his guilt but of course, that didn’t matter. Because of Jack’s age, the level of abuse and the lack of a previous criminal record the greasy blonde haired git only got a year. A fucking year behind bars and a tarnished record, that’s it. That’s all the fucker got.
The thought alone made Mark want to smack that smug judge in the face with his own stupid hammer.
It was like giving the grown man a stern telling off and a slap on the hand. It wouldn’t change anything and everyone in that fucking court room knew it. Maybe Jack was right after all. Maybe they were just living on bought time. Jason really did give off that ‘serial killer’ vibe.
Of course he didn’t allow himself to blurt his worries out to Jack himself. Jack had his own problems to worry about. He was still stuck in therapy once a week and he was making slow progress through the painful process of healing. Ava was helping him with that, even though Jack openly proclaimed he hated her and her unconventional methods. Mark could tell Jack was almost thankful for the breakneck pace during his weekly sessions, in fact the green haired boy had told him so. By this point all he wanted was to get better and he wanted it as fast as possible. Ava could give him that at least.
Still, Jack was tired of sitting in Felix’s house with nothing to do except wait for everyone to come home from work or school. He was visibly restless, unmotivated and plain bored and Mark hated that he could do nothing about it. He knew if he missed much more school the headmaster would be having a stern word with his parents and that was something Mark didn’t even want to touch, so instead he did his best to entertain Jack when they were together; watching movies, watching gaming youtubers, Tv shows, playing video games, hell, they even broke out some of Felix’s ancient, dust covered board games they were that fucking bored.
But it wasn’t enough.
Mark knew it wasn’t enough by the look on Jack’s face as he said goodbye in the mornings, he knew by the increasing number of beer bottles filling up the trash, he knew because Jack told him so, in the middle of the night, curled up on Mark’s bed when neither of them could sleep and he thought Mark would forget it the next day.
“I’m sad when I’m alone, Mark, and after a while I get bored of being sad. Tell you what, I’d better get a hobby, knitting or something, otherwise I think I’m gonna go fucking insane in this stupid house.” Jack had whispered, pausing for a second before laughing a little but there was no humour behind it, just a bitter hollowness that Mark couldn’t believe was coming out of his boyfriend’s mouth. “Oh wait, never mind, it’s too late for that I guess.”
Jack had fallen asleep not long after that but Mark had stayed awake that night, the words repeating themselves over and over again in his head like a broken record. Because Jack sounded so broken, so hopeless and it tore Mark apart to hear him talk like that.
Still, that didn’t mean he agreed with this.
“You can’t stop me from going.” Jack huffed, his bag slung over his shoulder and a look of determination etched on his features as he stared defiantly at Mark.
Mark sighed, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “Jesus Christ Jack, this is ridiculous. You know you’re not ready stop acting any different.”
They were standing in Felix’s kitchen, the blonde haired man and his girlfriend having left for work hours ago. Jack was angry, fire burning in his eyes that was all too familiar. Mark sighed to himself, they argued too much.
“What would you know about it? You can’t expect me to stay in this fucking house forever! I want to get a job, get myself a life of my own so I’m not just leaching off other people all the time. Why can’t you understand that?” Jack retorted, and Mark could see he meant it.
“Of course I understand! I just don’t think now is a good time.” Mark moved closer to his boyfriend, resting his hands gently on his shoulders and holding the other boy’s gaze firmly. “You’re just starting to get better. Do you really want to just throw all of that down the drain and end up at square one?”
The Irishman waited for a few seconds, thinking. To anyone else his glare could be considered hostile, but Mark knew that wasn’t the case. It didn’t take long before Jack’s shoulders slumped under Mark’s hands, his eyes dropping towards the ground in defeat. “Fine. God, you’re such a prick.” He muttered under his breath, shrugging off his bag and shoving it, with a little more force than was necessary, into Mark’s chest. “Have fun at school.”
The American sighed, feeling rather guilty as he watched his boyfriend stalk into the living room and throw himself on the couch, staring blankly at the dark Tv screen. Mark looked from the sullen figure to the door and then back again, weighing up his options before making his decision. He threw off his own bag into one of the kitchen chairs. School could wait.
Jack looked up at him, surprised when the door didn’t close, and found Mark standing over the couch, looking down on him with a small grin. He held out his hand. “Wanna play a game? I heard Felix bought a new one if you want, its horror.” Mark said, as much persuasion in his voice as he could muster.
The Irishman rolled his eyes with a lazy groan, taking Mark’s hand and allowing himself to be pulled up off the couch. Mark gave him a soft and quick kiss, his form of an apology, and when they pulled away Jack’s smile was a little brighter, sending butterflies amok in Mark’s stomach. He was forgiven.
All of a sudden the green haired man’s eyes lit up, Mark practically able to see the light bulb flashing above his head as he darted away. “Where the hell are you going?” Mark yelled after him, confusion etched into his face as he found himself alone.
A few seconds later, Jack was back, Felix’s video camera held carefully in his hand. “You know how I wanted a hobby?” Jack began, a hint of nerves entering his voice as he looked up at Mark hesitantly like he was worried Mark would judge him. The American nodded slowly, confusion still pulling his eyebrows together when Jack spoke again. “Well, I think I’ve got an idea about what I could do, wanna give it a try?”
Mark grinned and spoke without a second thought. “Sure. What were you thinking?”
Jack shrugged, a hesitant little smirk pulling at his lips before he held up the camera, giving it a little shake. “I was thinking about maybe recording our game and putting it on YouTube? Just for a laugh. It’d be something for me to do while you’re out but…I’d like you to help me get started?” He looked down at the floor. “Only if you want to.”
Mark laughed quietly, grabbing the camcorder out of Jack’s lose grip. “Well duh, of course I want to.” He held the recorder up to his eye, pretending to record his boyfriend right then and there. “It’s time to make you an internet superstar, Sean McLoughlin.” He joked lightly, stepping forward so he was practically shoving it in the other boy’s face
Jack snorted, pushing the camera away laughing as he moved to put the game into Felix’s beaten up PS2. “Get over here you idiot. How do I record the game on this thing anyway?”
***
“Jack?”
The green haired man snapped his laptop shut at the sound, a look of alarm on his face as his wide eyes found Mark standing at the door. His cheeks coloured a little, pink dusting his cheeks as he blinked up at his boyfriend. “Yeah?”
“Are you coming outta there?” Mark asked stepping into the little, almost cupboard-like room that Jack had been holed up in for the past few days. “Dinner’s ready.”
Mark turned to leave and Jack bit his lip, looking from Mark to his laptop and then back again for a second before apparently making a decision. “Wait a second, could you look at this for me? Just quickly before I post it.” He pleaded quietly and Mark looked around in surprise.
Jack’s YouTube career as Jacksepticeye was going unexpectedly well, for something that started out as a light-hearted joke he’d really thrown himself into it, even gathering a small following of nearly 100 thousand people in the 6 months he’d been uploading on the website. It was extraordinary.
It was like YouTube became Jack’s personal release, he poured himself into videos, uploading one a day consistently and learning as he went along. Mark noticed how after every therapy session Jack would immediately record a video, if for nothing more than to cheer himself up and give himself back his energy by cursing and laughing at stupid games he loved. It made Mark happy to see Jack so enthralled in something.
The Irishman still saved his evenings for Mark, often stockpiling videos so they could have weekends free for whatever plans Mark may have devised during the week. Still, in all the time he’d been working on his videos, he’d never once asked Mark to check one of them before. It was odd behaviour to say the least.
“What’s wrong with it?” Mark asked slowly, confused.
Jack bit his lip, looking up at his boyfriend pleadingly. “I just want you to see it first, okay? Please?”
The American let out a sigh but walked into the little room anyway, shooting Jack a roll of his eyes before pulling the headphones over his head and pressing play on the video. He could see the Septiceye Sam logo of Jack’s channel and held back a grin. Jack told the public the reason he chose the name Sam was because it was unisex and perhaps that was one reason. But Mark knew it wasn’t the only one.
Jack’s intro played, as per usual, Mark hadn’t watched many of his boyfriends videos but he knew he would’ve watched this one regardless. It was Jack’s 100 thousand subscriber special, a simple vlog and Jack started it off with a solid 3 minutes of thanking every single person he could think of which made Mark smile uncontrollably. He glanced over at Jack for a second with a lopsided grin, but his smile quickly faded when he noticed the nervousness and tension in Jack’s entire being. Good God, what was wrong?
The video continued on as any normal thank you vlog of Jack’s would, and Mark was beginning to wonder what all the fuss was about until he caught his name being said.
“I want to thank Mark, my own personal American idiot, who pushed me to do this. When I got here he was my first friend and he helped me through so much. I don’t think I’ll ever be done thanking him for everything he’s done for me. He’s absolutely amazing and I love him.” The Jack on the screen froze for a second, as though he wasn’t expecting that to come out of his mouth, wondering if he should continue. “Fuck it.” Video Jack muttered looking up into the camera, his eyes shining with an emotion Mark couldn’t name as a smirk grew on his face. “Thank you everyone so much for 100 thousand subscribers, I never thought we’d reach it, but if you liked this video punch the like button….”
And Jack’s outro rolled and Mark pulled off the headphones, turning to Jack who looked more worried than ever. He was biting his lip so hard Mark could see a glint of blood. “Should I keep it in?” Jack blurted out, his hand shaking as he moved it up to drag through his hair. “I- I didn’t mean to say it, it just slipped out and oh my god I don’t know what to do.”
Mark smiled at his boyfriend softly. Jack hadn’t mentioned to his subscriber base that he was dating a man, it had never really come up in the stupid gaming videos he did, but now that he was faced with coming out to the internet he looked absolutely terrified. Not as terrified as he was of Jason’s looming shadow, but close.
Mark took the Irishman’s hands in his, making the other man look up at him, blue eyes full of fear of the unknown. Mark couldn’t say anything about coming out, it all just sport of happened that way. He hadn’t spoken to his parents in a long time and Carrie had already worked it out for herself, there was no explanation necessary. And he was so lucky for that, but now Jack was opening himself up for judgment in front of over one hundred thousand people, and that was frightening to say the least.
“Well, do you want them to know?” Mark asked gently.
Jack shrugged. “On one hand it’s none of their business who I date but then,” He paused for a second, before continuing. “Why should I have to keep quiet about my relationship just because you’re a guy? I’m not ashamed of you, why shouldn’t I tell people?” The Irishman let out a groan. “Oh god this is so hard.”
The American let out a quiet laugh. “Just do it then, I don’t mind and the worst you’ll get is some mindless hate, that’s it. Go for it.”
Jack smiled at him, a little tear in his eye that Mark quickly swiped away. “Can we do it together?”
Mark nodded smiling comfortingly.
5 seconds later and it was done, the video was out for all the world to see, and Mark for the life of him couldn’t help but feel abuzz with giddiness even though he wasn’t quite sure why. The pink haired man turned to Jack, an excited grin on his face. “Congratulations Mr Internet Superstar for hitting 100 thousand subscribers.” He gave the Irishman a mock bow making him laugh lightly.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah where’s my dinner, peasant.” Jack chuckled and Mark easily scooped him up, lifting the laughing man towards the little kitchen of their not very luxurious apartment; mostly paid for with Mark’s job as a waiter in a restaurant nearby and the odd unsteady payment from Jack’s YouTube videos. Mark’s pasta bolognaise filled the room with the smell of canned tomatoes and garlic but Jack didn’t seem to mind and as they sat down for their dinner the wind outside battering the window pane was drowned out by the sound of mindless chatter and cutlery scraping on plates.
They knew they were never going to be the richest or the most successful couple in the world, hell they could barely afford the roof over their heads, but none of that mattered. Jack still attended therapy once a week with Ava even a year later, and Mark sometimes wondered to himself if Jack would ever get completely better, but that didn’t matter. They still argued with each other like little children, but they didn’t care. Jason’s sentence was almost over, he could come for them at any moment, but that wasn’t a problem.
It wasn’t the happy ending everyone in fairytales so craved where everything was tied up in a neat little bow; but it was enough for them.
It was enough.
THE END