Chapter Text
Hirano had... "pleasured" himself. Definitely not one of his proudest moments, but thinking about it sent a wave of embarrassing humiliation down his spine as he sank deeper into his blanket, not caring that his hair was still wet from the cold shower that failed to calm his body's excitement.
He was glad Kagiura took his words as rejection because, realistically, if he hadn’t, Hirano was pretty sure he would’ve been in Kagiura's arms right about now- or even worse, in his bed.
After only a couple of minutes of kissing, or well, more like making out with the man, Hirano had become agonizingly hard. It almost made him laugh, realizing “it” later in the bathroom while Kagiura's expression of genuine regret kept flashing in his mind. He was so glad there was a towel on the couch's armrest at that moment because if not, his boner would’ve been made clearly visible to the younger, who was only inches away from him. Maybe it was because he was still a virgin that his body got overly excited.
When you're a pilot with long shifts and barely any personal time, things like relationships and... other "activities" become more of a nice passing thought. Hirano had never felt as if any of that was of any importance to him anyways. He only ever masturbated when he got morning wood just to get it out of the way before work. Otherwise, he would just wait it out if he wasn’t busy that day. Either way, he never really got horny. Hell, he had never even thought about getting his first kiss, let alone an actual partner.
Oh God… Kagiura was his first kiss.
Surprisingly, it wasn’t as shocking a fact as it should’ve been. It honestly felt like somewhat of a relief knowing it was Kagiura who took his first kiss rather than some random stranger he didn’t even know. Even the thought of it being someone other than Kagi made him shudder, but one thing was for sure:
‘Why did Kagi kiss me?’
That was the most bizarre fact of it all. Yeah, they were both hammered, but Kagi had never done anything like that before. When they both did rarely drink together
, even when they went to drinking parties to reunite with friends Kagi would the majority of the time, stay quiet and cling to Hirano like an obedient puppy. Hirano had never heard from anyone that Kagi was the “loving” type when drunk.
Hirano wanted to chalk it up to Kagiura being pent-up, but realistically, why would he be? He was a tall, incredibly handsome professional basketball player with a soft, pretty voice and an admirable personality. There was absolutely no way Kagiura didn't catch people's attention. Even just going out together in public with the younger had people who didn’t even know about his profession asking for his number at least every three outings.
This was actually killing Hirano's brain trying to make sense of why Kagiura did what he did.
Maybe it was because of the band he has on his ring finger that he gave him as a present that was maybe scaring away any potential lovers for Kagiura but even with that, most people don’t get scared off by married men in the city, so he really couldn’t comprehend it.
All of this was starting to give him a headache. Either way, he had to stop stressing himself out and go to bed since he has a meeting with Hanzawa in the morning that he has to take care of, but he can’t get rid of the itch of the need to talk to Kagiura right now.
‘That can wait till tomorrow,’ he thought as he curled up, scrunching his eyes, forcing himself to slumber, hoping morning would come soon.
—
Morning came, and even with Hirano's aching hangover bothering him, it still didn’t distract him from what happened the previous night as he leaned against the brick wall, watching the sky slowly get more cloudy. ‘Kagi-kun didn’t even bother to tell me good morning today, but then again I didn't either…’ he thought with a frown.
“Hirano-san~”
Hirano turned his head, his thought being interrupted by a familiar fox-eyed man walking towards him with his all-too-recognizable smirk.
“Morning, Hanzawa. Ogasawara saved some seats for us inside the bar.”
“Oh, goodie.”
As the two men both entered the bar, the ugly feeling in Hirano's stomach started igniting again as he quickly sped-walked to the stool he claimed, sitting down immediately as Hanzawa stared at him for a minute before repeating Hirano's action and sitting down on the stool next to him.
Ogasawara quickly greeted them, handing them two cold drinks before quickly running off to attend to some other customers. The silence was almost deafening until Hanzawa started to laugh.
“Hey, what's so funny?”
Hirano basically barked out, frowning at the man who sat beside him, who was just clutching his stomach in a fit of laughter.
“I- it’s just! Well! You have really bad eye bags today. Did you and Kagi have an interesting night~?”
That certainly caught Hirano off guard, causing him to jolt, looking at the man next to him. He could almost see the fox-like traits become more prominent on the guy's face as he slowly took a sip of his drink to ease his throat from all his laughter. It almost pissed Hirano off.
“So what? It's not like it's any of your business.”
As if almost instantly after saying that, Hanzawa immediately started coughing violently as Hirano slowly started to pat his back to help him get whatever alcohol he had ingested out of the wrong pipe. It only took a couple of minutes for Hanzawa to compose himself again, now both sitting in embarrassing awkward silence from what had just occurred.
Hanzawa cleared his throat, looking away from Hirano's azure eyes. “Hey... I support you guys, but just- just remember to stay safe,” he choked out in a raspy, quiet voice, utterly embarrassed, taking another swig of his drink.
“What the fuck are you implying, you dumbass?” Hirano said, punching the man as a slight blush appeared on his cheeks, giving away his not-so-obviousness.
“Eh?” hanzawa raised an eyebrow slightly turning his head towards the blonde before deciding eye contact was too much and swirling his wine in his cup
“Nothing happened, okay? Kagi was tired and came home late, so I helped him bring all his luggage and crap inside, so I didn’t get enough sleep last night.” Hirano was absolutely lying out of his ass right now, but he'd rather die than let others peer into his nonexistent personal life.
“Ah, okay. That's good then. Hopefully he isn’t too tired to not attend the party you’re throwing him.”
‘Oh yeah, that’s the reason why I’m here in the first place.’ Hirano's mind was so preoccupied with last night's shenanigans that he forgot he set up a welcoming back party for Kagiura. It completely slipped his mind.
“Hey, snap out of it, Hirano. The bar’s about to empty out any moment now. Come on, get up. Let’s at least help Osagawara clean the place,” Hanzawa said, snapping his fingers in Hirano's face before getting up and pushing his stool back in its original place.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m getting up. Today is definitely going to be a long day.”
—
Despite the bar being an average size, it took hours to deep clean and set up decorations for the entire place, but they still had a little extra time to fool around before the rest of the guests and catering arrived.
“So, Osagawara, how is married life treating you? Are you and Eimi still bickering like always, hmm~?” Hanzawa said, wiping the wine glasses, making extra sure they were spotless
“I would say it’s been great. I’ve been waiting to marry her since high school, but I don’t think she’s so happy with me partying with old pals again so late at night.”
“Aw, shucks. Why didn’t you invite her then? The guest list isn’t private, you know.”
“Well, I just wouldn’t want her freaking out about who the party is exactly for. I also wouldn’t want her to interrupt Hirano’s alone time with his lover as well,” Osagawara said that last part a little more silently, but even with that, Hirano still stiffened and sat up straight.
“W-what do you mean- lovers??” Hirano sputtered. “Me and Kagiura aren’t lovers- we... we are just good bros.”
The room fell embarrassingly silent as Osagawara and Hanzawa just stared at the blonde, who at this point seemed more irritated than they were used to seeing.
“Oh, sorry. My bad, man. I just thought you guys were, since you’re extremely close and with that ring on your finger and this whole party you’re throwing, I- I just got the wrong impression.”
“What's so wrong with me and Kagi being close, huh? Rings don’t have to mean anything specifically. Haven’t you ever given someone jewelry before? It’s nice to do something for a friend, y’know- anyone would throw a party for someone they care about that’s been gone for a long time.”
Hirano doesn’t even think he’s convincing anyone, let alone himself at this point.
“Well, yeah, but regular people do house parties with cheap booze and maybe a cake. You literally rented out my whole bar for an entire night, even though I offered it for free, which you refused. You bought all these party supplies that took hours to unbox and set up. You paid several catering companies to arrive any minute now, and you are literally paying me to serve up as much alcohol as I can. I just don’t get why you’d go that far out of your way for just someone else.”
“Now, now, Osagawara, every relationship is different. Some are just closer than others. Don’t confuse the poor guy,” Hanzawa said lightly, managing to somehow lighten the mood.
‘Someone else?’ Hirano furrowed his brows as the words started ingraining in his mind. Kagi-kun isn’t just “sOmEone eLsE.” He was his best friend and roommate- was their relationship really that abnormal?
“This is stupid- just get to cleaning those glasses. I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket anyway. The catering is probably here now,” Hirano stated, getting up from his stool hastily, walking towards the door, and stepping outside.
—
The bar slowly started to fill up with familiar faces. Everyone whispering, shushed under the dim lights, making everyone completely blinded as they waited for the special guest to arrive.
Hirano had texted Kagiura fifteen minutes after everyone arrived to let everyone have enough time to get into position. It made Hirano’s heart ache seeing Kagiura leave him on read before responding five minutes later with a “We need to talk.” This was going to be an awkward night for them, but Hirano was determined not to let this affect their relationship.
The whispers in the room were immediately silenced when a loud knock at the door was heard.
“Hello?.. Hirano-san, I’m here,” the voice sounded soft and eerily sad when it hit Hirano’s ears. It made his palms itch.
After a few more knocks, it stopped before the door opened, only for the lights to turn on immediately, making Kagiura wince not expecting the amount of party poppers and confetti being thrown along with screams of “We missed you!” and “Welcome back!”
Kagiura just stared at the crowd surrounding the entire room, scanning every face he could before locking eyes with the blond that was directly in the middle of it. Suddenly, the room felt empty, all the noise and voices drowned out by the expression on Hirano’s face.
…It was the complete opposite expression he had on the night before- those shiny, scrunched-up azure eyes, that perfect smile with his lips slightly glossed, and the slight rosiness that formed on his face when he saw Kagi fully immersed in the light. All of that was gone as Kagi was met with Hirano’s wide eyes and almost blank expression.
Kagiura immediately stepped forward, reaching out his hand towards the blonde, but before he could utter anything out, Hanzawa stepped in between them.
“Welcome back, Kagiura-kun. Getting a little handsy there, aren’t we? I mean, you’ve been gone for a while, so I won’t reject a hug from my former kohai,” Hanzawa said with a smile as he picked up a glass and a spoon from the counter next to them and started tapping the spoon gently on the glass.
“Our special guest has finally arrived! Everyone, get excited and get in line to enjoy an array of unlimited free alcohol and food while it’s still fresh! And a special thanks to Hirano-san for organizing and paying for the whole event, so everyone, give them a round of applause.”
The cheers and clapping were deafening as familiar faces quickly started gathering in groups, talking or checking out what the party had in store. Now, it really was just them (and Hanzawa) with no crowd standing around. Kagiura opened, then closed his mouth, standing in complete awe before looking down.
The tension was so thick it was almost amazing. Hirano just stood in embarrassment, flushed as being outed as the sole organizer and funder of the event.
Hanzawa seemed to catch on quickly to the atmosphere. “Kagiura-san, long time no see, huh. It’s nice to know you’re still doing well. I know some lovely people who’d want to see you again right over here,” and with that, Kagiura was quickly dragged by the arm to a random booth filled with people.
Hirano was somewhat glad that Hanzawa served as a distraction because, if he was going to be honest, he still hadn’t thought about what to say to Kagi. Hopefully, with a bunch of snacks and liquor, Kagiura would forget about it or at least not take it so seriously.
But is it that serious? If it was just a mistake, they should’ve been able to laugh it off by now- but they haven’t. The whole situation made Hirano’s head hurt as he quickly went to get himself a drink and sit with Sasaki and the others from high school.
—
Hours went on, and Hirano somehow managed to dodge Kagi, seeing multiple instances of Kagi being swept away by groups of old friends trying to reconnect. It was amusing in a way, but it was also nice to see at least a slight, sweet smile appear on his face when he recognized old pals.
“Hey, Hirano, your roommate- um, Kagiura is looking for you. He should be waiting in the private booths for you,” Sasaki muttered nonchalantly, sitting down across from the blonde, nuzzling his face into Miyano’s neck.
“Fuck,” Hirano muttered, looking down, quickly chugging his drink that was in front of him as the others stared.
“Hirano, is everything alright? You’ve been acting strange all day,” Hanzawa said sternly, slightly straightening his posture as the blonde shot him a glare.
“I can’t help but say he’s right, though. Hirano, you’re usually so whipped and psyched to be around roommate-kun during times like this, and now you’re practically hiding from the guy like you owe him money. Like, really- what’s up with you, man?” Ogasawara said while typing on his phone, presumably to his wife.
“Oh, shut up. You guys are reading too much into things. Me and Kagi-kun are completely fine. It’s none of your business anyway,” Hirano grumbled, getting off the booth roughly, practically feeling the stares of his friends digging into his back while making his way to the private booths covered by fancy red curtains.
All the noise from the party immediately muffled when he closed the curtains behind him and was met with the sight of Kagiura sitting alone in the second booth with his head down. Hirano would’ve immediately made a U-turn and booked it if it wasn’t for Kagiura spotting him in time. He swore Kagiura’s eyes lit up before immediately flickering.
This crap was making Hirano cringe inside.
This had to end now.
“Hey, Kagi-kun,” Hirano said with a smile, walking toward him and sitting down on the opposite side of the booth as he fiddled with the menu on the table. “How are you enjoying the party?” he said, tilting his head, trying not to break eye contact with the younger before settling his gaze on the menu in front of him
Kagiura’s face flushed for a moment before nodding. “I love it.. thank you, Hirano-san, but you didn’t need to do any of this for me. You already celebrated welcoming me back last night.” That last sentence made them both flush slightly as Hirano recollected himself.
“I just wanted to surprise you, that's all,” Hirano stated.
The silence grew awkward. It’s been years since this type of tension existed between them. It was almost frightening.
“Hirano-san, we need to—”
“I’m happy you won the tournament, y’know. I watched every game, interview, and ad you were in while you were gone. I’m proud of you.”
Even though he was met with silence, Hirano could still practically feel the flush radiating off the younger without lifting his view from his menu, but for some reason, he still wanted to see his expression with his own eyes.
“Hirano-san, I just-”
“You must be hungry, Kagi-kun. Did you try the strawberry parfait?”
“Hirano-s-”
“Kagi, you must be thirsty. Let me go get you something to drink-.”
As soon as Hirano got up and attempted to book it, he felt a stern grip on his wrist by none other than Kagiura, who reached across the table pathetically, with his face still hidden.
“Please, Hirano-san, we need to talk.”
The older hesitated, but when Kagiura’s desperate grip on him faded, Hirano huffed and sat down.
After another minute of silence, Hirano spoke up.
“Look- we were both drunk and weren’t in our right minds- so let’s just forget about all of this and go back to normal.”
“Hirano-san, let’s get a divorce.”
“Huh — why?” Hirano shouted, sitting up and slamming his hands on the booth’s table.
“This isn’t something I can just forget about, Hirano-san.”
“Over something this little?!? What’s going to happen to us living together? What about the apartment?”
“I’ll move out. If you can’t afford it on your own, I can still pay my share of the rent-.”
“I don’t need your fucking money- I can take care of myself!”
“Look, Hirano, I just- I...” Kagi paused before lifting his head, looking Hirano in the eyes.
“Hirano-san... I’ve been in love with you for the past ten years. I never forgot about you. When we reunited, I was so happy- especially when we started living together. And when you agreed to sign the marriage certificate... I thought I could be satisfied with just that. But after last night... I can’t anymore. Now that I’ve gotten a taste, I don’t think I’ll be able to hold back anymore...”
Hirano couldn’t help but flap his mouth, flushing slightly before settling on a frown.
“Is living with me really that painful? Aren’t we friends?!” Hirano barked out.
“Yes, of course we are, but my love for you runs so much deeper than that! When I look at you now, all I think of are flashes of last night and how much I want to kiss you and touch you again. But it’s not only that- I want to spend the rest of my life together with you, buy a house together, have a honeymoon, be able to be something more than just something on paper- but something real!... a real partnership. And I don’t think I can still live with you normally if I know we can’t have anything more than just.. that.”
Hirano just stared at Kagiura, watching the younger’s face flush more and more . He honestly didn’t know what to say. It’s not like he signed the certificate for a whole bunch of bullshit. He did it because he lov- cares about Kagi and didn’t want him to leave, especially after not being in contact for so long. It took a lot of resolve for him to realize that.
“Ah, I see now...” Hirano whispers as he looks away his fist on the table tightening
“So, is it finalized-?”
“You’re blackmailing me.”
“What!?”
“That's it. That’s completely it! That’s what you did last time with the whole marriage thing! You said you’d move out if I didn’t sign it! So that’s it!”
“I- uh, I can admit it. I was a little bit forward, but how would this be blackmail, Hirano-san? You shouldn’t wanna live with your attacker.” The younger pouted, finally relaxing in his chair.
“What are you talking about- attacker?!? And I’ve never once asked you to hold back! If I didn’t like it, I would’ve punched the daylights out of you! So we basically attacked each other- it was mutual!-.”
Hirano was quickly cut off by a hand of a blushing frustrated Kagiura.
“Listen, Hirano, I don’t think you know what you’re saying right now, so how about we just call it a night and go home?”
The older frowned before taking the younger’s hand in his and laying both on the middle of the table.
“Together, right?” he mumbled.
Kagiura sat silent for a minute before sighing and turning his head slightly before gripping Hirano’s hand tighter.
“Together.”
Watching the older’s hand tighten around his made his chest hurt. He was now a grown man with a full-time job who had achieved basically all his dreams, yet he felt like tearing up just like he did when they found out they couldn’t stay roommates anymore. How embarrassing- he didn’t grow as a person at all, acting like this in front of someone he loved because he got rejected to being rejected — how silly is that?
Once his lips started to quiver and he felt his eyes get glassy, the blonde across from him immediately withdrew his hand from his before swiftly going in with a tight embrace.
It felt weird. Almost like he was hugging a huge dog, patting his head, before gripping his hair, pulling Kagi closer when he tried pulling away. He couldn’t say it felt bad though, because all he could do back was hide his face in Hirano’s shoulder before hovering his hands from Hirano’s lower to upper back and squeezing him back.
“Let’s go home, Kagi-kun, together.”
“Mhm, yeah, uh-huh,” he said through choked-back whimpers.
And for a moment, he felt a drop of something wet grace his cheek when Hirano pulled away.
—
By the time they both got out of the private booth, almost all the guests had left, and who remained was everyone from high school and the dormitory. They helped clean up the best they could, and when Kagi checked his phone, it was already 6 a.m. the next morning.
They really did spend all day partying.
Once the bar was back in order, everyone said their goodbyes, and they called a cab home.
The car ride was seemingly pleasant. It was cold, but the atmosphere wasn’t, and that was what Hirano wanted.
Lying back on the car seat, he turned his head to Kagi, who was knocked out like a light, using the seat belt as a pillow with his strong hands keeping it in place. Hirano has always liked his hands.
‘I really did stress him out, didn’t I?’ he thought, letting out a tired smile, lifting and reaching his hand out, only to drop it back down and settle it on his lap.
‘Why did I want to pat his head just now?’