Chapter Text
The woman in the mirror smirks in response to your shock, her resemblance to you uncanny. She wears the near inverse of your formal robes - black with red embroidery. Arcane symbols of power have replaced your symbols of balance. Even her makeup is different than yours: sharp and intended to terrify. The most terrible part of your ‘reflection’ is her gaze - cold and emotionless.
Your heart races. For a brief moment you flounder, adrift on a sea of panic. The hiss of Vader’s ventilator is deafening.
This can’t be happening! He can’t become Vader! Can he? I saved him! He promised me he would always come back to the light for me. Unless…am I the reason he fell? Is this my fault? Should I have let him go?
Every misgiving you ever felt about falling in love with Anakin comes crashing back upon you. Your stomach begins to twist upon itself, sand worms burrowing through your insides.
Beside you, Anakin wrestles with his own reflection, his own emotional storm buffeting you through your shared Force connection. For a moment there is nothing but chaos and fear in your mind. The pressure of panic sits on your chest with the weight of a rancor until you can barely breathe.
Your belt begins to rock on your waist. One of your pouches pops open. A juvenile traiga sprout peaks out, tilting its upper leaves towards you as though you are the sole source of light. The plant’s gesture is so cute and endearing it captures your entire attention. You use your free hand to stroke the vine gently. The vine curls around your hand in response, giving you the tiniest of hugs.
You remember to breathe. The tension in your chest eases as you exhale. In a matter of heartbeats you’re calm again, squeezing Anakin’s hand in reassurance as you stare back at your reflection, full of insolence and challenge.
She laughs at you. “Oh, you really thought you could save him from his destiny, didn’t you? You poor, stupid girl. Why would he come back to the light for you? You’re the reason he fell.”
Your stomach clenches again, guilt threading its way through your intestines.
“No,” Anakin protests beside you. “Don’t believe her. She’s lying to you, repeating your worst fears back to you and pretending it's wisdom. I would always come back to the light for you.”
Vader laughs. “Unless she fell first.”
Sith you smirks at Anakin. “She did fall first. She literally fell from the sky, and has been corrupting the entire galaxy since she arrived. She knew you would become Darth Vader and instead of telling the Council about you, she maneuvered herself to be close to you because she was already in love with you. Isn’t that right?”
She switches her gaze to you. “You already loved him, already wanted him. You wanted his power for your own. So you manipulated events in his life to bring him closer to you. You formed a Force bond with him and then you seduced him to seal the connection and become a Force dyad.”
You blink at her in confusion, flames of anger rising in your gut. “I never manipulated him or his life. I only wanted to save him. I did not seduce him.”
Sith you laughs, throwing her head back before glaring at you with her golden eyes. “You isolated him from his only friend and from the love of his life. You groomed his family. You tricked the Council into making him your apprentice even though you’re not a real Jedi.”
Her words hit your solar plexus like a well-timed punch.
Your vine stretches around your entire hand, squeezing it like you did Anakin’s.
“You’re a liar,” Anakin argues with your reflection. “She’s the most real Jedi I know. She’s more real than you. You’re just a Force illusion.”
“If we are only illusions, how can we still hurt you?” Vader laughs, reaching his hand out in his signature choking gesture.
To your horror. Anakin claws at his throat, making choking sounds.
Panic begins to set in, eating away at your calm. Your heart races. You have to do something, but what? If Anakin is right, and these are Force illusions, then he should be able to stop choking once he knows Vader isn’t real. “He’s just an illusion, Anakin, he isn’t real. Don’t let him choke you. Breathe.” You squeeze his hand gently.
Sith you cackles. “Look at you, still trying to control everything. What’s the matter, afraid you’ll lose your power if he dies?”
You glare at her. “No. I love him. And I’ll prove it.”
Destiny struggles to reassert the pattern that was meant to be.
You step between Anakin and his reflection, hoping to break the illusion but Vader persists. “You don’t want to choke him, Vader. You want to choke me. After all, I made you fall. I hurt you. It’s my fault. Choke me. Take your vengeance out on me, instead.”
Vader laughs. “You cannot save him.”
You shake your head, reaching towards Vader with your vine-covered hand. Your heart races in your chest. The vine wrapped around your hand continues to apply gentle pressure, tethering you to something real. You have one chance. “No, Anakin. I’m trying to save you.” You focus your love on the Vader in the mirror, projecting it outward as you have done twice before.
He wavers, his hand shaking. His mask fades, leaving behind an unburnt Anakin, his eyes flashing between gold and blue.
Behind you, Anakin gasps for air.
Sith you laughs mockingly. “She doesn’t want to save you. She just wants to control you. She’s using her feelings to manipulate you. Choke her and you’ll be free.”
Sith Anakin releases his grip on Anakin, reaching to choke you instead. His hand still shakes.
“It’s ok, Anakin,” you reassure him. “Choke me if you need to. I won’t hate you.”
“No.” Anakin steps up beside you. “We aren’t choking anyone.” He raises the hand still holding yours as if showing his reflection. “You can’t hurt her. You love her. Because I love her. And you’re supposed to be me, right?”
Your Anakin turns his attention to Sith you. “Or our worst fears. Isn’t that right?” He mimics her tone from earlier.
You would laugh, but his reflection still has a grip on your larynx.
“He’s my worst fear. And you’re hers.” Anakin grins at your reflection. “But I know you’re full of bantha poodoo, and I can prove it. I’ll give up the Force for her.”
Your heart skips a beat. Your brain stutters to a screeching halt, unable to process his words. No. He can’t give up the Force!
Anakin continues talking. “I’ll wear Force suppression cuffs for the rest of my life. Or ask the Mandalorians to experiment on me. I’ll be a mech and fix dwang like I did as a youngling.”
No, Anakin! You want to cry out but you feel frozen in place by shock, unable to accept the idea of Anakin as a non-Force user. Your brain still struggles to make sense of anything.
Your reflection falters, just as his did.
Anakin grins. “I don’t have to be a Jedi to balance the Force. I don’t even have to be a Force user. All I have to do is be willing to sacrifice for the greater good. So do your worst to me. But I won’t let you touch her.”
Something in your chest bursts open, warmth pouring out in waves. Your brain suddenly restarts, spitting out two realizations at once: He would choose me over the Force. Destiny struggles to reassert the pattern that was meant to be, and sometimes it fails.
As though his words are the final number in a combination lock, the figures before you fade away, revealing an ordinary, blank wall.
You inhale deeply, grateful to breathe freely again.
Anakin turns to face you, bringing your joined hands up to his chest. “I meant what I said. I’ll demand the Council strip the Force from me. I know it can be done. And I will do it as soon as we go back to Coruscant if that’s what you need.”
You blink at him, tears in your eyes. “Anakin, no…”
He shakes his head. “If you’re scared of being the reason I fall to the dark side, I’ll give up the Force.”
Genuinely crying now, you step closer. “I don’t want or need you to give up the Force for me. I already know you’ll never become Darth Vader.”
Anakin frowns. “How can you be so certain? I thought you were afraid falling was my destiny?”
You smile at him through your tears. “I know because of what you just said. You were threatened with losing me and didn’t lash out in anger or fear. Instead, you offered to give up part of yourself to save me.”
Anakin laughs. “You offered to die for me.”
“Well yeah, if that’s what it takes to save you, of course I would die.” You stick your tongue out at him.
Anakin sticks his tongue out at you in response. “I don't need you to die for me. I need you to live for me.”
You start to laugh, but Anakin’s look stops you.
“I’m serious,” he says. “I appreciate everything you’ve done for me but you’ve done enough sacrificing and throwing yourself in harm’s way. If we’re actually a team, we need to act like one.”
You frown, feeling confused by his words. “I thought we were acting like a team?”
Anakin’s look implies he thinks you’re full of bantha poodoo. “We act like a team if you mean a Master and Padawan pair, but not as a couple.”
Your frown deepens. “I don’t understand. How have we not been acting as a couple?”
Anakin arches his eyebrows. “The cave forced us to confront our deepest fears just now. Mine is becoming Darth Vader and losing you. Yours is obviously causing my fall.”
You smile weakly. “Yeah.”
Anakin sighs. “You aren’t responsible for my choices. I am.”
You find yourself blinking back tears again. “I know.”
Anakin gives you another discerning look. “Do you? My biggest fear is becoming a monster. Yours is being wrong for loving me.”
Your chest tightens and your traiga vine gently squeezes your hand in response. “I’m sorry.”
Anakin shakes his head. “I’m not upset; you don’t need to apologize. But I can’t help you face your fears if you don’t trust me with them.” He gestures to the now blank wall. “Tell me what she said doesn’t have anything to do with your nightmares.”
You look down at his feet, feeling guilty. “That would be a lie.”
Anakin leans his forehead against yours. “Your fears immediately attacked our relationship, doing everything to split us up. Working together is how we defeat them.”
“You’re right,” you agree.
Anakin continues, his voice soft. “Padmé was never the love of my life. You are.”
Your heart does a strange sort of somersault in your chest, flipping over and expanding, flooding your system with a surge of emotion. “Anakin…”
He places his free hand on your cheek. “I don’t care what your stupid prophecies said about me and her. You are everything I ever wanted and everything I never knew I needed and I need you to know that.”
You’re crying again.
Anakin wipes your tears away with the pad of his thumb. “I love you and only you. I’m sorry I abandoned you on Tatooine for a whole month. I’m sorry I attacked Obi-Wan instead of checking on you after he assaulted you. I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me. I’m sorry I was an insensitive schutta and hurt you. If I could go back and undo those things, I would.”
You look back up, smiling at him. “I’m not sorry. Those moments pushed me to be more honest with you.”
Anakin smiles back. “While we’re being honest, I’d like to correct some other things your fears said. Palpatine was never my friend. You saved my family. You are a real Jedi, the best Jedi I’ve ever known. You didn’t trick the Council, Yoda assigned me to spy on you. And I know you’re not trying to control me.” He pauses his rant for a moment, his expression shifting. “But…what exactly is a dyad?”
You laugh. “I’m not entirely sure. Some sort of Sith prophecy about two beings who have a strong Force bond and can do wizard stuff as a result.”
Anakin grins. “What kind of wizard stuff?”
As you and Anakin exit the blowhole, squinting against the relatively bright light, two things strike your attention. One, Ahsoka looks incredibly pleased with herself and the batch of fish she has strung on a stick over her shoulder. Two, the sky has already begun to change colors, heralding the setting of the suns.
“I was beginning to wonder if the sea had claimed you both,” Obi-Wan comments pointedly.
Ahsoka grins. “But you did give me plenty of time to go fishing.”
“Wait.” The entire experience felt like maybe thirty minutes to you. “How long were we gone for?”
“Hours.” Ahsoka’s tone is totally glib as though she
Obi-Wan sighs. “What did you find in the cave?”
Anakin chuckles, running his hand through his hair. “The dark side.”
“I feared as much.” Obi-Wan scowls. “I was genuinely worried we had lost you.”
“I’m sorry we worried you, Obi-Wan.” Anakin rests his hand on the older man’s shoulder. “We thought we were only in the cave for half an hour at most.”
Obi-Wan smiles at him. “The dark side distorts many things. I am not surprised to discover time is one of them.”
Before any of you can comment any further, the island begins to ring with song. Voices carry up from the shore near the landing pad. When they are silent, more voices sing out from the Lanai village. The two groups engage in a call and answer, joyous voices filling the island with song.
“What is it?” Ahsoka asks, her eyes sparkling.
“I don’t know,” you reply. “Their voices are too distant and distorted by the acoustics of the amphitheater. If I had to guess, I would say the Festival of Return is beginning.”
The four of you walk westward across the island, the voices growing louder as you approach the amphitheater. A migratory line of Lanai Visitors stretches and winds up the island slopes, small circles of soft lantern light making them more visible in the growing dark. A full moon rises in the sky.
Ahsoka turns to you, excitement written on her face and in her voice. “Can we?”
Obi-Wan shrugs as if to say he’s tired of arguing.
Anakin looks at you. “The only reading left on the wayfinder is the mystery location embedded in the Temple floor.”
“We might as well at least go take them the fish then, right?” Ahsoka looks at you with wide, pleading eyes.
You can’t help but laugh. “Sure, Snips.”
The four of you follow the tail end of the Visitor procession down to the Lanai village. Their voices call down to the Caretakers with joyous announcements of homecoming. The Caretakers call back to them in a chorus of warm welcome. The subdued atmosphere of this afternoon has been replaced by a party.
You can see the warm lights and smell the food of the Festival from the top of the stairs. Round lanterns hang suspended from rooftops, illuminating the village in puddles of light. A big fire roars in a central pit, tended by several watchful Caretakers. More Caretakers are cooking some sort of fish dish on a large rock over the fire. Others are playing instruments, filling the cove with playful, energetic music.
As they enter the village, each Visitor adds his catch and harvest to the growing pile of fish, seaweed, and other seafood being processed by the Caretakers. Another Caretaker gives the Visitor a round of bread and a flagon of a steaming warm drink before he wanders to where his loved ones are. Gaggles of children weave their way through and around the procession, hugging Visitors and clinging to them with shrill, raucous cries. Fledgling Visitors, easily identified by their awkwardness, hold court surrounded by even younger Lanai. A gaggle of hatchlings sit in a circle, tended by a handful of older Caretakers.
When your turn to enter the village comes, Ahsoka adds her fish to the bounty. The nearby Caretaker nods approvingly, handing each of you your bread and drink.
You and the others make your way to a spot near a wall, where you can at least lean against something, if not sit down. A handful of little Lanai totter past, some sort of treat clutched in their hands as they play. A fledgling Caretaker wanders by, passing out bowls of soup. Behind her, another fledgling brings bowls of fried fish and vegetables. Course after course of food follows. Laughter and voices mingle in the night air. A steady drumbeat winds its way through the crowd, answered by several other instruments whose cadence has already persuaded several Lanai to dance. Their happiness is contagious.
Having stuffed himself, Anakin pushes away from the wall, holding out his hand to you with his most charming smile. “Dance with me?”
You smile at him in response, placing your hand in his. The two of you join the other dancers, doing your best to honor their style of dancing. You both fumble, but laugh anyway, carried away by the fun of the moment. After several rounds of dancing, the two of you stop to catch your breaths, enjoying another serving of the warming festival drink.
Anakin wraps his arm around your waist and you lean into his shoulder, content both to be surrounded by so much mirth and to enjoy the simple comfort of Anakin’s embrace without guilt or fear of repercussion.
Obi-Wan averts his gaze, no doubt thinking of his own relationship.
Ahsoka stares out across the bay of the cove, frowning.
Anakin notices at the same time you do. “What’s wrong, Snips?”
She turns to look at him, worry written on her face as she points out to sea. “Where is all the water going?”
You follow her finger, looking for what sparked her concern, but all you see is low tide. “The water is being pulled by the gravity of the moon; it’s low tide.”
Her worried look changes to a thoughtful one. “So the dry land out there will be sea again soon?”
“Yes. Though probably the water will come up even higher for high tide if low tide is so many meters out,” you explain, wondering how this kid can understand the math for hyperspace but not know what low tide is. One thought follows another and soon your entire brain is lit up, the words of the Caretaker’s song from earlier suddenly returning to the forefront of your mind.
“When the sea takes her leave, a new shore revealing, a full moon lifts the gloom, a lost room revealing.” You speak the lines aloud, suddenly understanding their meaning. “That’s it! Ahsoka, you’re brilliant!”
“I am?” She frowns at you. “I mean, thank you, but why am I brilliant?”
“I know where the wayfinder is trying to take us.”