Chapter Text
Epilogue: Summer
June 1987
Nancy
“Nancy, where the hell are dad’s binoculars? I could have sworn they were right here!”
“Why would I touch those binoculars?” Nancy rolls her eyes as Mike runs around the living room, checking under couch cushions, on the bookshelf, and– confusingly– under a houseplant. Beside her, El lets out a giggle, while Will gets up to help Mike look.
Nancy has been entertaining their houseguests while Mike finishes packing up, despite the fact that he should have been done the night before. She checks the clock.
“They’re going to be here any minute!” Nancy calls out. Sure enough, when she looks out the window, Steve’s blue chevy pickup is pulling into the driveway, hauling an attached trailer behind it.
“Crap!” Mike yells as he thunders down the basement stairs, still in relentless pursuit.
Will is calling after him. “It’s not a big deal–Lucas has binoculars!”
El leans toward Nancy conspiratorially. “Mike says he is going to take me stargazing, just the two of us.”
Nancy raises her eyebrows at her. “You don’t need binoculars to go stargazing.”
“He says it will help me see Venus!” El says. “And he doesn’t want to borrow from Lucas because Lucas will insist on coming with us, and–”
“And you want to be alone. I get it.” Nancy smiles at El. She likes the girl, though they’ve never had much of an opportunity to get close. Something inside her squeezes nervously for her. El and Mike are sixteen now, the same age Nancy was when she had sex for the first time. “You two will be careful, right?”
El raises an eyebrow at her. “You mean use condoms?”
Nancy lets out a huff of surprise at her bluntness. “Someone already talked to you, I guess?”
“Joyce,” El nods sagely.
“Well… good,” Nancy says tightly, pursing her lips and patting El’s knee awkwardly. When the doorbell rings, she jumps up in relief.
It’s Robin who stands there nervously. “Hiya, Nance!” She peers around her to wave at El. “We’re here for the remainder of our motley crew!”
Nancy smiles. “Mike and Will are on the hunt for some last minute items, so they might be a moment.” She turns to call over her shoulder. “Mike! Will! Your ride’s here!”
Some unintelligible yelling wafts up from the basement. Nancy sighs and smiles primly at Robin, making a face that she hopes conveys an apology for her idiot brother.
“Well, we can at least load you all up with the rest of their stuff.”
Nancy, El, and Robin set about grabbing the tents, duffels, and sleeping bags that litter the front hallway and haul them out to the camper. As they do so, Steve jumps out from behind the wheel of the pickup truck.
“Hey, let me help you guys with that!” he says, rushing to grab the door of the trailer.
“Steve, ever the gentleman for us poor helpless ladies!” Robin says sarcastically, feigning a swoon. Steve sticks his tongue out at her in annoyance as he grabs the sleeping bag from her hands and stows it in the storage rack attached to the undercarriage.
“Hey Nance, El,” Steve says, smiling between both of them. Nancy can tell there’s something guarded in his eyes as he looks over at her.
El smiles shyly as she passes Steve her bags. A moment later, Max, Dustin, and Lucas rush out of the trailer to envelope El in big hugs.
As the younger teens are occupied with greeting each other, Nancy turns to Robin and Steve and nods toward the house. “They might be a sec.”
“The usual– Mike’s being a doofus,” Robin supplies helpfully, and Steve chuckles. Nancy watches how easily Robin makes Steve laugh and feels something pang inside her. Despite the fact that she’s now slept with both of them, they both seem more at ease together than she’s ever been with either of them.
Nancy glances away, turning her attention to Steve’s trailer instead. “So this is where you live full-time now?”
Steve nods with a combination of embarrassment and pride. “Yep, I’m entrusting my home with these gremlins for the next week. We’ll see if I regret it in the end.” He opens the door wide and gestures in. “Do you want the grand tour while we wait?”
After a moment of hesitation, Nancy finally nods and follows him inside. To be honest, she and Steve haven’t really spoken much since the blow-up back in January. Since returning for summer break a week prior, Nancy and Robin had grabbed dinner once and that’s been as close to learning how Steve is doing that she’s gotten.
Going from living in Loch-Nora to Forest Hills seems like quite a fall from grace. Some part of her feels pity for Steve, which she knows he would hate, so she tries to tuck that part of herself away as she glances around the inside of the mobile home. She quiets the voice in her head that sounds suspiciously like her own mother, tsking at the idea of living on the wrong side of town.
What she sees surprises her. The home feels… cozy. Almost kitschy in its details. So unlike what she remembers of the Harrington house, with its cold, overly designed interiors. A small stuffed yellow lion sits perched on a shelf next to a house plant. She picks up an embroidered potholder dangling from a hook by the stove, holding it up with a wry smile.
“Gnomes?” she asks. The potholder bears the image of two gnomes with long white beards holding hands.
“Dustin enjoys any excuse to buy me household items,” Steve explains. She watches his eyes dart away from hers again nervously, as though afraid to see how she’ll react to the mention of Dustin.
It’s more spacious on the inside than she expected. On one of the few pieces of available wall space is a cork board pinned with photos and postcards. She glances through them curiously. Indianapolis, Dunes National Park, Chicago…
“My plan is to buy a postcard in every place I go. I’m leaving some space to build up a collection,” Steve says over her shoulder. Half the corkboard is blank, awaiting further adventures.
She glances back at him and smiles. “That’s nice,” she says quietly. She means it. If she’s ever admired anything about Steve, it’s his optimism. Her eyes catch on the photos on the board. There’s a photo strip of Robin and Steve making faces together in a photo booth pinned up alongside a few printed photos of Dustin and Steve in formal suits, smiling and laughing with each other. She recognizes their outfits from the night of the Winter Gala. Another photo captures Steve and Dustin outside, arms slung around each other posing in front of what must be the Dunes. They’re an odd pair, different in every conceivable way, and yet Nancy can’t help but admit that they look good together. Happy.
She’s always been good at seeing things no one else does– has always prided herself on her ability to get to the bottom of things. But for the first time, she feels like she finally sees Steve clearly.
Behind her, Steve is busying himself tidying up needlessly, shoving items into drawers as though suddenly aware of inexcusable clutter. “So anyway, that’s the big tour I guess!” he says. “Not much, but it’s mine.”
Nancy glances around. Sees that Robin has excused herself, and it’s just the two of them now in the trailer together.
“Steve?” she says, stopping him mid-tidy.
He freezes in the middle of folding a flowery dishtowel. “Yeah, Nance?”
She turns to fully face him, hands folded defensively in front of her. “I just wanted to say– uhm– I’m sorry.”
He meets her eyes for the first time, confusion writ large. “Huh?”
“Sorry about giving you grief about Dustin,” she clarifies. “And telling you to leave Hawkins.” Nancy rubs her own arms, trying to soothe the nervous energy that tells her she should turn tail and run. She hates talking about this kind of stuff.
“Oh. Yeah,” Steve says lamely. “Yeah, I mean– that kind of sucked, but I know you were just worried for Dustin…”
“-- which was something Dustin himself hated,” Nancy adds, smirking. She rolls her eyes at herself and runs her hand through her hair. “The truth is, with everything else that’s gone down, I can’t help but feel like an asshole.”
Steve neither confirms nor denies her self-assessment. He just watches her with his big brown eyes, looking like he’s preparing himself for the other shoe to drop.
Nancy can’t handle that look. It reminds her too much of their alleyway argument all those years ago. She turns away to gesture toward the photos on the cork board. “You look good together. I’ve never seen you look so happy.”
Some tension in the air eases. She can almost hear the way Steve’s muscles unlock as he lets out a sigh of relief. “Yeah, Nance,” Steve says. “I love him. A lot. And uhm… he loves me, too.”
“That’s good,” she acknowledges. “You need someone who loves you the way Dustin loves you.” She’d never been that person for Steve, but she’s glad he’s found that person now.
She feels Steve touch her shoulder, and she turns at last to lean in for a hug. The shape of his body is familiar, and as she places her head against his collarbone she can’t help but smile at the way he still uses the same hairspray and deodorant now that he did back when they dated.
“Sure you don’t want to come camping with us?” He asks into her hair. “Robin would be ecstatic.”
Nancy pulls back and shakes her head. “No, I’m okay. This is for you guys. But thanks.”
They exit back out into the June sunshine just as Mike and Will run out of the house.
“Found them!” Mike says breathlessly, holding the binoculars aloft.
“Oh, cool!” Robin walks over and snatches them from his hand. Mike is too out of breath to do more than protest weakly. She proceeds to peer through the binoculars at each member of the party in turn.
“Where the hell were they?” Nancy asks.
There’s a long silence, at which point Will finally speaks up. “Uh, they were in Mike’s room this whole time.”
“Son of a bitch! Really, Mike?” Dustin grouses. “We could have been out of Hawkins by now!”
“Come on, twenty minutes isn’t going to cost us anything!” Mike complains. He snatches at Robin, who dances easily out of his reach.
Robin twirls her way toward Nancy and Steve, getting right up in Nancy’s face with the binoculars. “Nancy Wheeler, I see you…” Robin says in a goofy faux ghost voice.
Nancy laughs and pulls the binoculars aside to look into Robin’s eyes. They grin at each other. Ever since their conversation back in March, Nancy and Robin have been trying out being just friends. She’s liked it so far, though when Robin’s lips are this close to hers she can’t help but imagine letting it turn into something more once again. Perhaps, when they’re ready…
“Hit me up when you get back?” Nancy asks warmly. “I was thinking we could hang out at Hawkins Pool.”
“Ooh, only if I can sit under an umbrella. I burn red as a tomato,” Robin exclaims. She carries the binoculars around her neck by the strap, looking like an enthusiastic birder. “But yeah, that sounds great.”
“C’mon Rob, you can flirt with Nance next week,” Steve says easily, pulling Robin away. He turns and throws Nancy a wink.
Max, Lucas, Mike, Will, and El all pile into the attached trailer, while Robin and Steve head up front to the pickup truck. Dustin moves past Nancy to make his way to the passenger side door of Steve’s truck, and she makes a split second decision.
“Dustin?” Nancy calls, and he turns as though yanked by a chain. He pauses, looking at her for the first time that day. There’s something stormy in his look.
“Yeah?”
“I just want to say… have a good time with everyone,” she says, pursing her mouth awkwardly around the words. “Don’t let it go by too fast.”
Dustin furrows his brow at her suspiciously, as though trying to unearth a double meaning.
She feels even more exposed than she did speaking to Steve in his trailer. It makes her skin crawl as she searches for the words to express what she’s thinking. “I hope you and Steve have a good time together,” she clarifies. “I hope you have all the time in the world.”
“Okay,” he says cautiously. He shifts away from her, and some part of her is relieved this isn’t the kind of interaction that ends in a hug. Neither of them seem quite sure enough of each other to close that distance. “Bye, Nance.”
Nancy can’t help but notice the way Dustin climbs into the passenger seat and leans deliberately over towards Steve in a clear excuse to touch him, bumping arms and heads as Dustin murmurs something into his ear. Steve reaches an arm around his shoulder and pulls him close– almost as though for a kiss, though they would never be so bold to kiss where Mr. and Mrs. Wheeler could glance out and see. The two are easy in their affection, and it draws a small smile from her despite herself.
As the truck and trailer pull down the street, Nancy waves from the end of the driveway. She can see Robin waving back to her from the back seat of the Chevy, turned around with her binoculars trained on Nancy.
Nancy imagines Robin’s eyes tracing her face and smiles, hoping the other girl can see her clearly. She watches Robin watch her until the truck and trailer turn a corner, obscuring them both from view.
Robin
Once they turn the corner, Robin lets the binoculars drop against her chest and lets out a dreamy sigh. “Nancy sure is something…”
From the front seat, Dustin lets out a huff of annoyance. “I can’t believe you guys are trying to be friends after everything. Lesbians are unbelievable.”
“We’re emotionally mature, some might say,” Robin corrects primly. She looks out the window, watching the neat middle class houses of Hawkins pass her by. As excited as she is for this camping trip, and as much as she loves spending time with Steve and her friends, she is excited for summer to come to an end so she can start the next chapter of her life. She’s ready to leave Hawkins behind for the big wide world of college.
There will be plenty of other fish in the sea at Smith, she’s sure. But none like Nancy Wheeler.
Dustin continues to grumble, and Robin can tell he’s annoyed at the implication that Nancy is more emotionally mature than him.
“I don’t think it’s crazy to want to be friends,” Steve says, breaking her reverie. Robin’s head swings to Steve, and she sees how he’s watching Dustin carefully from the corner of his eye. “I want to be friends with Nancy.”
“What the hell, no way! After all that shit she said to you? About us?” Dustin exclaims. From her vantage behind him, Robin can see his curls trembling in vehemence.
Steve glances back toward Robin in the rear view mirror, then refocuses on the road. “She apologized to me just now,” Steve says. Robin and Dustin both react– Robin with delight and Dustin with shock. “Anyway, I think she feels bad about… all that.”
“Well, she should!” Dustin says emphatically. He sits back however, somewhat mollified.
“Nancy apologized?” Robin breathes, and she feels something soften inside her that had been holding tight ever since their conversation back in March. Nancy doesn’t want her heart right now, but a part of her still desperately wants to give it to her. She wants to think Nancy could change her mind about things, including her feelings on love and relationships.
“Yeah,” Steve confirms. They pull onto the highway out of Hawkins, the tree lined streets giving way to cornfields. “I was so sure she was trying to corner me and give me a piece of her mind again, especially after you abandoned me in there with her,” he says accusingly, and Robin snorts.
“You were fine,” she says, waving her hand airily. “I kind of didn’t want to get in the way of Nancy being like, nice to you for once.”
Steve snorts. “Thanks, I guess? How could you tell she was going to be nice?”
“Just intuition, I guess,” Robin says easily. She does think she can tell Nancy’s moods by now. It’s in the curl of the lip and the way she holds her shoulders. There was something about Nancy’s considering eyes as she looked at Steve earlier that just made Robin feel like maybe, just maybe, Nancy was feeling kind.
“Okay, are you done mooning over Nancy? Because if I recall, we have some business to get down to,” Dustin interrupts her thoughts, sounding official. He rummages through his backpack and pulls out one of his many notebooks. “I officially call to order the dissolution ceremony of Robin Buckley and Steve Harrington’s lavender relationship. All present please state your names.”
“Dude, you know our names–”
“Please state your names for the record!” Dustin interrupts.
“Steve Harrington,” Steve says with an eye roll.
“Robin Buckley.”
Dustin makes some scribbles in his notebook, and Robin leans forward to look over his shoulder. “Wow, have I told you your handwriting sucks?”
“To be fair, it’s a moving vehicle,” Steve says evenly.
“Bad handwriting is a sign of superior intelligence,” Dustin snaps. “Okay, enough derailing. Do you, Steve Harrington, agree to break up with Robin Buckley, such that you are no longer romantically entangled in appearances or otherwise, as long as you both shall live?”
“Uh, yeah, sure thing, babe,” Steve says as he carefully takes a left, eyes flicking to his side and rear mirrors to make sure the trailer turns smoothly.
“And do you, Robin Buckley, also agree to break up with Steve Harrington?”
“Absolutely!” Robin says enthusiastically.
“Perfect,” Dustin says, checking something off in his notebook. “So under the terms of this lavender breakup, you both agree to never engage in the following: kissing on the lips, with or without tongue–”
“There was never tongue!” Steve protests.
Dustin clears his throat and continues, “Ahem– no kissing on the lips, no holding each other around the waist unless there is physical need to support each other vis a vis in the event of further Russian torture or otherwise–”
“More Russian torture?” Robin asks, bewildered.
“Well, if Steve gets beat to shit again I would hope you could support him by the waist,” Dustin clarifies. “But none of that couple-y, cutesy stuff you guys have been doing all year.”
“Ugh! I don’t want your sloppy seconds anyway!”
Dustin soldiers on. “Furthermore, if anyone were to ask if either of you are dating or engaged in a romantic relationship together, you will only respond in the negative.”
“Yep, I’m on board with that,” Steve says.
“And you will only attend events as each others’ plus ones with the express permission of myself, Dustin Henderson.” Dustin proceeds to sign his signature. He passes the notebook back to Robin. “Sign here.”
“Man, Steve, he’s really got you on a short leash, huh?” Robin says as she signs with a flourish. She hands the notebook back.
“Can I sign later when I’m not driving, Dust?”
“No, I’ll sign for you,” Dustin says. “I already know how to forge your signature.”
“Christ,” Robin says.
“Cool,” Steve says at the same time.
“Excellent. And with that, I now pronounce you lavender divorced!”
“Broken up,” Steve clarifies. Eyes still on the road, he reaches a hand back over his shoulder toward Robin, and she accepts it with dignity. “Let’s never do this again.”
“Agreed,” she says easily, squeezing his hand back.
Something seems to settle in the car after that, or maybe just within Robin. She loves Steve, has known that pretty much since the weeks after Starcourt. He’s the first person she could genuinely call a true friend; not friends because they had the same classes or band practices together, but because he actually wanted to spend time with her and listen to her. Dustin has been harder to pin down. She’d always found her relationship with him a touch awkward, thrown off by his intensity and at turns amused and irritated by the way he demanded Steve’s attention and time like it belonged to him. And maybe, Robin admits to herself, deep down she still hadn’t liked the feeling of being supplanted because even though Dustin had been friends with Steve first, she’d always assumed the friendship had been a little lopsided. That Dustin was the driving force in why they even hung out at all. But now she knows the error of her assumptions.
The sun emerges from behind a bank of clouds, spilling in brightly through the windows of the truck. Robin watches as Dustin wordlessly fishes around in the glove compartment and pulls a pair of sunglasses out that he puts into Steve’s outstretched hand.
“Remind me of our route again?” Steve asks quietly to Dustin, who pulls the car atlas from the passenger door cubby and flips through it, laying out the first few roads and turns they need to take, and the miles between them.
Dustin’s tone is less bossy than Robin has come to assume from him--his instructions are straightforward and direct, and when Steve suggests a different route to skirt around Bloomington, Dustin pauses to consider it, before agreeing and making a note in pencil on the page.
Robin shifts in the backseat, trying to get comfortable. Her knees butt up against the back of the front seats. She wishes she was sitting up front so she could stretch her legs, but she’s also glad she doesn’t have to play navigator for Steve. She roots around in her bag, looking through the cassettes she’d brought. Dustin cranes his hand back.
“What are you playing for us?”
She considers for a moment, and then slaps Whitney Houston’s self-titled album into his palm. As the lyrics to “You Give Good Love” fill up the car, Dustin asks: “So as our resident DJ, what’s your radio name and your sign off? You gotta have one. You know, like this is Casey Kasem. Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars.”
Robin laughs as the three of them start brainstorming. It’s Steve who suggests “Rockin Robin,” and they all agree it has a certain ring to it.
Just outside of Indianapolis, Steve pulls off at a rest stop to pick up snacks and fill the truck’s tank with gas. Robin amuses herself with her binoculars, people watching through the windows as she tracks people’s movements around the lot.
She spends a few seconds tracking the movements of a trucker as he wanders the aisles of the convenience mart, then switches views and looks across the road to the small Greyhound bus station.
Her viewfinder trails along the queue of awaiting passengers, observing a mother with her two young children, several men in suits, and a young woman with a bright blonde ponytail who looks eerily like…
“Chrissy Cunningham?” Robin breathes to herself. She pulls the binoculars aside and realizes she’s by herself in the truck, with Steve outside pumping gas and Dustin rendezvousing with Lucas to select snacks.
She holds the binoculars up to her eyes again to confirm.
Chrissy
Chrissy is hefting her bag more firmly onto her shoulder from where it was slipping down, when she hears her name being called. She closes her eyes in frustration. How has anyone figured out where she is?
“Chrissy!” she hears her name being called again more loudly, and as it gets closer, Chrissy realizes it's not the angry timbre of her mother’s voice, but a much more exuberant one. “Hey, Chrissy, is that you?”
Chrissy turns around and sees that Robin Buckley is waving frantically to her from across the road. Behind her is a large camper trailer. Steve Harrington, Dustin Henderson and a bunch of their friends are all milling around laughing and roughhousing. She gives Robin a small, surprised wave, even as disappointment drips into her stomach. She’d been hoping to make a clean getaway.
The disappointment only grows when Robin looks both ways before jogging across the street, clearly intending on coming to talk to her. She hops over the barrier, catching her foot as she does, but manages to catch her balance at the last second.
“Hi Chrissy, I thought that was you!” Robin says. A pair of binoculars dangles around her neck, bouncing against her chest as she rocks backwards and forward on her heels excitedly. “What are you doing in Indy? Are you catching the bus back to Hawkins?”
Robin’s voice is a burst of cheeriness after the somewhat harrowing few hours Chrissy’s just endured. She’d left her house with her mom’s shrill lecture still ringing in her ears, but she’d left. And that’s what matters.
“No, actually,” Chrissy says, feeling a little awkward. “I’m catching the bus away from Hawkins.” She nods at the Greyhound bus as it pulls up, and Robin glances up to catch the destination flashing across its display.
“Chicago?” Robin breathes. When Robin turns to look back at her, Chrissy sees something new and considering in her eyes. “I know we haven’t really seen each other much since--well, since I talked to you at the hospital, and I feel bad about that, especially since I’m sure it’s been hard what with…” Robin rambles before trailing off, clearly not wanting to mention Jimmy. As if somehow by mentioning him she’d be reminding her of him. But the truth is, Jimmy is never far from her thoughts. “I heard you broke up with Jason for good.”
“Well, that comes with the territory of pointing a gun at him!” Chrissy says, voice higher and sharper than she means it to be. She’s not even upset that things are over with Jason. Only upset over the way it had happened. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap.”
“No offense taken,” Robin says, holding up her hands. She looks at Chrissy’s duffel bag on her shoulder, crammed against her backpack and the string bag hanging heavily off her wrist, cutting into the skin. “How have you been?”
Chrissy shifts her weight, muscles starting to ache. She decides to put the bag down even though the ground is dirty, and is grateful for the relief. Robin’s eyes look kind. They always have, even when she rants about injustice and the importance of standing up for yourself. It’s why Chrissy had ended up confiding in her so much.
“Uhm, not good, to tell you the truth.” Chrissy hesitates, trying to get control of her emotions. She feels like all she’s done for months now is cry.
“Because of Jason?” Robin asks, eyebrows lifting in sympathy.
Chrissy looks past Robin, back along the one lane highway that leads from Indy to Hawkins. The woods on either side of the road have their fresh early summer green, and dance cheerfully in the breeze. They nearly form an arch over the road, like a gate that beckons Chrissy back toward the familiar life she’s always known.
“Yes. And no, I suppose.” The last time she’d seen Jason had been through a glass divider at the county jail, speaking through phones hooked up to the wall. It had been ridiculously easy to break it off with him completely then, because as soon as she did all she had to do was hang the phone up and turn around, so his yells and scowling face were completely out of sight and out of mind. She’s relieved to be free of him now, though the ache of their long history together feels like someone’s reached into her chest and rearranged things.
But she can’t ever forgive him. Not for what he did to Steve and Dustin, no, but also for what he did to Jimmy. Jimmy, who had looked like a hunted animal. Jimmy, who had decided he’d rather be dead than live another day under Jason’s thumb.
Each night she tries to fall asleep, she can’t seem to get Jimmy’s words at that intersection out of her mind: “I just can’t find a way through.”
It tears her apart to think Jimmy had been suffering so intensely, and she’d done so little to help him. Each night she dreams of Jimmy and that day in the car, it ends differently. Sometimes he’s driving the car into oncoming traffic, other times he’s stuck on the brakes, unable to move. More recently, he’s turned the car away from their original destination, swerving them both out onto an open road that leads toward an unfamiliar horizon line. She’s trying to follow that feeling, which is why she’s moving towards something new at last. Away from the life she’s known and the life she’s been told she should want.
“Are you visiting someone in Chicago?” Robin’s question breaks Chrissy out of her reverie.
“Well, technically yes,” Chrissy says brightly. “I’m visiting Eddie!” Robin’s eyes widen in surprise at Eddie’s name, and Chrissy can’t help but giggle a little. “But I’m also moving in with him.”
“Wow, Chrissy, really?” Robin lets out a whistle, shaking her head in amazement. “Full of surprises, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, I decided I needed a change,” Chrissy says. “And one of Eddie’s housemates moved out, so there’s a spare room. I figured I could find work waiting tables or at another hair salon– whatever, you know? But just get away from Hawkins for a while.” Or forever.
“Man, just wait until I tell Dustin that you’re moving in with Eddie–” Robin says, then stops and looks at her carefully. “Can I tell Steve and Dustin?”
“Yeah, they’ll find out anyway,” she says easily. “Eddie says he talks to Dustin all the time. Though uhm… this move to Chicago was pretty last minute, just so you know…” Chrissy had decided just two days ago that she couldn’t take her mother’s screaming or the prayers said over her at church. She couldn’t take the way the people of Hawkins looked at her as she passed them by, as though they knew something about her. To them, she’ll always be Jason Carver’s girlfriend, her name always mixed up with the torrid tragedy of his family.
“I won’t spread rumors, don’t worry,” Robin is quick to add.
“I’m not worried about that anymore.” Chrissy nods back toward where she can see Steve standing by the truck in the gas station. He waves over at her but makes no move to approach. The last time she’d spoken to him had been a couple weeks after the Quarry Incident, as she now refers to it in her head. He had found her after one of her shifts at the hair salon, stumbling over his words in an attempt to thank her for saving his and Dustin Henderson’s lives. He’d looked drawn and tired, dark circles under his eyes and body thin, like he’d had a bad stomach flu that had forced him to shed weight rapidly. He still looked far better than he had at the hospital, when it looked as if he was going to collapse in on himself at any moment. The unreality of the experience seemed only heightened by the fact that the confident, suave and carefree boy she’d known in high school was letting himself be directed by her through the hospital like a lost child.
Jason had ranted to her about the two of them and their so-called “sin,” and she’d never really believed that Steve Harrington of all people was like that. But after what she’d witnessed both at the Quarry and then frantically driving them to the hospital, she guessed that although Jason might have been right about them in some ways, in others, he was as far off the mark as it was possible to be.
Chrissy had interrupted Steve mid-sentence by grabbing his hands and saying emphatically: “I’m just glad I was there, and that Jason is behind bars. Consider it my thanks for saving me back at the Gala.” Steve had laughed, a bit hysterically, but accepted her words, and that had been that.
She gives Steve a wave back, and then switches the subject. “Where are you guys headed?”
“Some state park Steve and Dustin picked out,” Robin says. “Taking some friends camping for the week.”
“That sounds nice,” Chrissy smiles. She looks at Robin’s binoculars. “Are you going bird watching?”
Robin seems surprised when she glances down at herself, like she’s forgotten about the device hanging from her neck. “Oh, well not exactly. For now, I’ve been people watching. It’s how I saw you across the highway.”
“Well, I’m glad you saw me,” Chrissy says, and she realizes she means it. “Not many people know I’ve left Hawkins. No one, in fact. Just Eddie.”
“So I’m kind of like your farewell party, huh?”
Chrissy nods. “Yeah, I guess so.” Ahead of her, people in the queue begin to move sluggishly forward. The bus is finally ready for boarding. Chrissy grabs up her bags and looks at Robin. “And here’s my ride!”
“Hey, if you’re staying with Eddie, can I give you a call sometime?” Robin asks, fidgeting nervously with the straps of her binoculars. “I can get Eddie’s number from Dustin. I’d just like to hear how you’re doing, you know?”
“I’d like that,” Chrissy says. She starts walking slowly forward with the line, and Robin keeps pace with her. “Tell Steve he can do the same.”
“Oh, he and Dustin call Eddie all the time! You’ll probably see them next time they visit Chicago.”
Chrissy thinks she’d like that. She thinks she’ll like a lot of things about being out of Hawkins. Above her, a large bird whirls through the air, outstretched wings silhouetted against the silver clouds. She can’t wait for the road back to Hawkins to grow smaller behind her.
Overcome with a sudden thrill of excitement, Chrissy throws her arms around Robin’s shoulder and squeezes her tight. Her duffel bag knocks against Robin’s side, and she feels the other girl let out a gasp where her lips press into her neck. The binoculars dangling on Robin’s chest press into her ribs, hard and cold, but she doesn’t mind the mild ache. It’s a messy hug, and it’s exactly what she needs.
“Safe travels, Chrissy.”
Dustin
Dustin confiscates the binoculars from Robin on the second hour of their drive. She doesn’t fight him on it, having tired of the bit.
There’s not much to look at through the binoculars yet, but he likes the weight against his chest and amuses himself by training them on birds he sees wheeling above them in the sky. Steve and Dustin play twenty questions while Robin dozes lightly in the backseat. Steve is annoyingly good at asking questions, though Dustin chooses obscure enough items that he can beat Steve on pure technicality alone. This leads to several minor arguments about whether a proton can technically be categorized as a “mineral” or not. It can’t, and Dustin loves watching Steve get animated, waving one hand around emphatically while keeping the other on the wheel.
They arrive at the campground with plenty of daylight to spare. It’s a few days before the summer equinox, and the sun won’t go down until well after 9pm. Max, Lucas, Will, Mike, and El all pile out of the trailer. They set about erecting tents around the trailer– there’s three tents total. El and Mike claim a tent of their own, as do Max and Lucas. Will agrees to room with Robin, who doesn’t mind ceding full use of the trailer to Dustin and Steve.
“Try not to make your sex too raucous, okay?” Robin says as she nails her tent stake into the ground. “The rest of us have to sleep.”
“I don’t think you’ll have to worry about us,” Dustin drawls, gesturing to the other couples erecting their tents around the site. “We’ll have actual walls, unlike the rest of these lovebirds.”
Robin groans. “I should have brought ear plugs.”
Despite himself, Dustin feels giddy at the casual mention of sex with his boyfriend. He smirks at Steve as he passes him by, carrying firewood. Steve’s ass looks great in his jeans, and if Max and Lucas catch Dustin ogling him as he bends over the fire pit, so what? He and Steve are a couple just like the others. Even if they still have to hide their love while in Hawkins, out here in nature with only members of their Circle for company, they can just be themselves.
After setting up camp and eating dinner, Mike corrals them all for the first session of a mini Dungeons and Dragons campaign he’d planned for this trip. Robin chooses to sit out, preferring to read her books and smoke some weed, but everyone else is on board. Most importantly to Dustin, Steve is playing. To Dustin’s delight, it had taken no convincing to get Steve to agree to join the campaign.
“I want to make up for missing your birthday!” Steve had said when Dustin brought it up while planning the trip. He held up his paladin figure, which sat in pride of place by his bedside. “Do I get to play the same character?”
“Mike will have to let us resurrect you, but I think we can manage it.”
And Mike agreed, setting up the early part of the session to revolve around the party resurrecting Sir Steven. Dustin is ecstatic, though unsurprised, that Mike lets his character Nog do the honors of casting the resurrection spell.
“How would you like to do this, Nog?”
Dustin rubs his hands together gleefully, shifting closer to Steve who up until this point has been sprawled across a picnic blanket listening in. “Pretend you’re dead, Steve,” he says imperiously.
Steve rolls his eyes, laughs, and then rolls onto his back. Eyes closed, mouth softly closed, face slack… Dustin leans over him. “I wake him with a true love’s kiss.”
Lucas and Mike make faces, while El, Max, and Will let out whooping cheers.
“You bastard,” Steve murmurs, a smile tugging at his lips.
“There’s also the spell, right?” Mike says. “I mean, you also have all these spell components–”
“Yeah, yeah, but it says here in the spell book that there’s a somatic component requiring touch. I don’t see why lips don’t count. I do all the verbal and material spell bits and then Nog leans down and plants a big one on Sir Steven’s pretty lips!” Dustin says, hand waving Mike away.
“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” Max starts up the chant, and then El joins in. Lucas shrugs and lets out an encouraging cheer.
Dustin leans over Steve, watching the way he is trying desperately not to smile while playing dead. Putting his hands on either side of Steve’s head so that he’s bracketed in by his arms, Dustin declares, “Come back to me, Sir Steven, knight of the realm. Cast off the chains of death and return to your true form, body and spirit as one. With true love’s kiss, I command you, return…”
He bends down, feeling Steve exhale a soft breath against his mouth moments before Dustin presses a chaste kiss to his lips. After a moment, Dustin begins to pull away, but Steve wraps an arm around his shoulders and holds him there to deepen the kiss for just a moment longer. Around the campfire, the Party members let out applause and cheers.
Finally pulling apart for air, Dustin and Steve pant and smile happily at each other.
“Welcome back to the land of the living, Sir Steven,” Dustin says, and he feels like he’s smiling so hard that his cheeks hurt.
“Good to be back,” Steve grins, eyes glimmering in the firelight.
While it takes some time initially for Steve to get a handle on the playing mechanics, Dustin doesn’t mind. It’s the perfect excuse to huddle close with Steve over his player sheet and whisper advice into his ear. Steve gets into it, even asking Dustin to blow on his dice for good luck each time he has to roll.
Secretly, Dustin had been worried that Steve would be turned off by the role playing part of the game, but Steve proves himself game, speaking in a slight British accent when speaking as Sir Steven.
Mike had planned out a dungeon crawl, giving the Party plenty of places to explore in the maze-like tunnels of a cult leader’s secret fortress. At a certain point, party members break off to explore different branches of the tunnels. Will’s cleric goes with El’s barbarian, while Max and Lucas pair up. Nog drags Sir Steven into the heart of the dungeon to help him look for a forbidden book of knowledge. At first, Steve seems content to follow along with whatever Dustin wants to do, but he takes Dustin by surprise when he pushes back on his insistence at opening one of the treasure chests.
Sure enough, it’s a booby trap that sets off a chain reaction of animated skeletons that they have to fight off. Dustin enjoys finding ways to work together with Steve to defeat the monsters. Like in real life, they work well together. Steve fends them off with a flurry of attacks with his great sword, drawing the main brunt of their ire while Dustin takes the time to set up a series of spells that ensnare and destroy the skeletal soldiers.
They don’t manage to finish the story that night. Mike has several more sessions planned out to last them through the week. Dustin glances at Steve out of the corner of his eye when Mike mentions this, worried that despite having fun in the moment, perhaps Steve won’t want to spend so much time playing the nerdy game.
Instead, Steve pumps his fist excitedly. “Hell yeah, dude, that means I have more time to get better at using Divine Smite!”
Dustin pulls him in for another kiss at that, not caring that his friends are around, not caring that Will is snapping photos with his Polaroid camera, not caring about anything at all except the feel of Steve in his arms and the warmth of the fire and the adventures that he will get to continue with his friends in the days to come.
Steve
The campaign extended well after the long light of the June evening had faded, which works out perfectly, Dustin says excitedly, because it means they don’t need to wait around at all before going stargazing. Crickets chirp and cicadas roar as Dustin packs tarp and blanket into his backpack, but one by one the rest of the group starts begging off going on the short hike through the woods to the lake’s edge where Dustin had determined was the best viewing spot.
Lucas insists that someone needs to tend to the fire and that he doesn’t trust anyone else to do it. Robin is in the middle of a conversation with Will, and waves off the invitation to get moving. Mike and El look the most eager to also set out and look at the stars, but Max’s sharp eyes view the assembled party and suggests that El needs to hear some classic campfire ghost stories, to which El readily agrees. Mike, clearly unwilling to split from El and not interested in third-wheeling, decides to stay too. He offers Steve his binoculars, a small friendly smile on his face as he does.
Dustin stands at the edge of the fireside, backpack slung on one shoulder, looking irritated for a long moment, as everyone bunks down at the campsite. Steve, on the other hand, can’t find it in his heart to be too upset because it means they can be alone and out of earshot of everyone else. He slings the binoculars around his neck as he catches up with Dustin.
“C’mon,” Steve says, tugging Dustin toward the trailhead by the hand. “This way we can add an entry to your notebook,” he whispers in Dustin’s ear. Dustin perks up instantly and skips to walk beside Steve, clicking his flashlight on to illuminate their path through the woods.
“I would have thought you’d put up more of a fight about getting ticks on your junk,” Dustin teases.
Steve suddenly reconsiders the fantasy that was forming in his mind in the last five seconds. “Ugh, actually, never mind. I take it back. This is a strictly clothes-on excursion.”
Dustin bumps into Steve intentionally, hanging onto his arm. “Aw, c’mon, the heavenly bodies in the sky aren’t the only ones I want to get my eyes on tonight,” he says suggestively.
Steve untangles his hand from Dustin’s to wrap his arm around him instead, digging his fingers into his waist to tickle him. He yelps loudly, trying to pull away, but Steve holds on tight and wraps him up completely to better torture him until Dustin all but collapses in his arms, squealing in misery.
“I surrender! Stop, have mercy on me,” he begs, and Steve relents at last.
Dustin shoves away from him and runs up the rest of the path as Steve shouts for him to be careful of roots, even as he gives chase laughing breathlessly.
“You’re so mean to me!” Dustin yells behind him as he breaks out into the wide field that leads to a sandy lakefront. “I can’t believe you hate your boyfriend so much!”
Steve really sprints after Dustin at that, and when Dustin realizes Steve is actually trying to catch him, he lets a frantic, “Oh, shit!” and books it. Steve catches Dustin easily at the edge of the field and the two of them end up tripping over each other and they go down in a tangle of limbs, Steve managing to pull Dustin down on top of him instead of the other way round. They’re laughing and gasping for air and make no move to extricate themselves from each other this time.
“I’m nothing but nice to you,” Steve defends himself. “I’m too nice. I practically let you get away with murder.”
“Nope,” Dustin insists. “You are a cruel and demanding lover. I literally wanted to kill Jason and you wouldn’t let me.”
Steve rolls Dustin onto his back, pinning his wrists in place and slotting their legs together. He leans over Dustin and growls in an exaggerated voice: “As your cruel and demanding lover, I demand you kiss me.” Dustin’s face lights up in delight at how goofy Steve is being before Steve swoops down and captures his lips. When Steve releases Dustin’s wrists, still supporting most of his weight on his arms, he wraps his arms around Steve enthusiastically and pulls him closer. They smile into each other’s mouths, trading light kisses and knocking their noses together until Dustin pushes him off so they can set up their blankets as planned.
Steve can’t seem to keep his hands to himself though and intentionally gets in Dustin’s way the entire time, relishing how annoyed he’s making him. Dustin bats at his chest lightly when they fling themselves on their backs to look up at the inky sky littered with stars.
“Okay, Henderson, so tell me what I’m looking at. I know that’s the North Star.” Steve points up into the air and then traces his finger down. He holds up the binoculars but immediately gets lost, the sudden change in depth confusing him about where he is looking. He pulls the binoculars away in annoyance. “And it’s part of the Big Dipper, right?”
“No, the Little Dipper. Ursa Minor. Ursa Major is this one,” Dustin corrects, moving Steve’s arm further south to where seven bright stars form the shape.
Dustin continues to educate Steve on the constellations above and the stories behind them that a bunch of people made up about them at some point. When Dustin starts talking about nebula and superclusters and what makes one star more important than another, Steve loses track of things. Steve turns from where he’s tracing the hazy band of the Milky Way with his eyes to look over at Dustin instead. His eyes are lit up in excitement, a wide grin on his face as he continues to talk. He looks beautiful.
Not realizing that Steve isn’t watching Dustin’s hands waving around to point out different constellations, he continues. “Next is Cygnus, the swan, which has one of the brightest stars in the sky and also contains--Steve, are you listening to me?”
“Yeah, totally,” Steve says, watching Dustin’s lips fold into a pout.
“No, you aren’t--” Dustin looks over at Steve and his words die on his lips at whatever he sees on Steve’s face.
“Yes, I am. You’re telling me about the swan. Ziggy.”
“Cygnus, Steve!”
“It’s a nickname. I’m calling it Ziggy Stardust from now on,” Steve insists.
“You can only call it that if you can point it out in the sky and prove that you were paying attention.”
Steve turns and looks back up at the sky, trying to swiftly figure out what configuration of stars could possibly constitute any type of bird, let alone a swan. He points at random off to his left at a cluster of stars.
“Not even close,” Dustin says.
Scooching closer, Steve lays his head on Dustin’s shoulder. “Okay,” he says easily. “Point Cygnus out to me again. And tell me what weirdo story there is for this one. I’ll pay attention, I promise.”
Dustin directs Steve’s gaze by moving his head, hand on his chin, and points out the bright line of stars that form the wings and the other line that crosses perpendicular to form the long neck.
“All the myths about Cygnus are sad. I don’t have to tell them tonight. Anyway, the astronomical features are much more interesting--”
“Why are they sad?” Steve pushes. He can follow along with the myths much better than the science.
“Well, just that there’s different stories but most of them are about doomed lovers,” Dustin says, putting his arm around Steve and squeezing him closer. “One story says that after Orpheus was murdered he was transformed into a swan and placed in the sky. He was a great musician who played the harp--look, that constellation is right next to Cygnus. When he found his lover Eurydice had died he was so overcome with grief that he went to the Underworld to rescue her. He played music so beautiful that he was able to convince Hades to let Eurydice return with him. The one condition was that he had to lead her out of the Underworld without looking behind him, but at the last moment he turned around to see her and then she was torn away from him again, back to the Underworld.”
Steve waits to hear if there is more to the story, but when Dustin lapses into silence, he wrinkles his nose in confusion. “He sounds kind of like a dumbass to me. Why would he turn around if he wasn’t supposed to? Seems like a pretty simple plan to fuck up.”
“In some versions Orpheus is so excited when he gets back to the upper world that he forgets she hasn’t emerged from the Underworld behind him yet. In other versions, he can’t hear her and loses faith right before they emerge, thinking that Hades had tricked him,” Dustin explains. “But yeah, I agree. I never understood why he couldn’t just wait a little bit longer to confirm things. If it was a trick then he was going to lose her anyway, but if not, then he would have gotten her back and things would have ended happily for them!”
Steve drapes his arm across Dustin’s middle and knocks his head against his. “Guess it was a bit of a long shot for them anyway though? If she’d already died. I mean, they got a little bit more time together at least and a chance to say goodbye. That’s more than most people get.”
Both of them are quiet, and Steve imagines Dustin is probably thinking similar things to him. Thinking about what they’d almost lost. Steve is almost bowled over by the wave of relief that washes through him, tinged with grief of what might have been.
“It sure has been a crazy year, hasn’t it?” Steve breathes, the words woefully inadequate to describe everything that has happened.
“Jesus, yeah…” Dustin sighs. “I can’t believe I still have two more years of high school. I wish we could just skip past it all and go right to college.”
Steve runs his fingers along Dustin’s arm, pressing them briefly around his wrist before covering his hand with his own. He wonders whether Dustin will want to strike off on his own adventure when college comes around. If maybe he’ll be ready to leave Steve behind in Hawkins by that point.
“Thought at all about where you’ll want to go?”
Dustin hums thoughtfully. “I’ve got a list I’m working on. Caltech, UC-Berkeley, Stanford, Northwestern, Purdue, MIT. Any of those places particularly appeal to you?”
“What do you mean?” Steve asks.
“Well, you’re coming with me aren’t you? So does California or Massachusetts sound better to you? Or we could stay in the Midwest--”
Steve knocks his head back and laughs. “You can’t base your college decision on what state I’d rather live in, Dust.”
Dustin rolls onto his side and looks at Steve. “Sure I can!” He catches Steve’s eye and holds his gaze seriously. “I want you with me.”
“Dustin, you already know what you want from your future. You know what you want to study and what career you want to have. Honestly? I’ve never been the best at thinking ahead or planning for the future. So I couldn’t give a shit about what state I’m living in five years from now.” He reaches up and plays with one of Dustin’s curls, rolling the strands of hair between his fingers. “The one thing I do care about is that wherever I am it’s with you. So for the next two years, you’ll study your ass off to get into wherever you want to go, and I’ll work my ass off to save money and figure out some career.” He caresses his knuckles down Dustin’s cheek, enjoying the soft solidity of him. “And then you and I are going to get in my trailer and put the 'Welcome to Hawkins' sign behind us. What do you think of that?”
Dustin grins broadly. “Steve Harrington, I think this might be the best plan of yours you’ve ever had.” He pulls Steve in for a kiss.
Steve knows the years ahead of them will be difficult, but as they lay under the stars on the edge of the lake, trading conversation and sharing silence, he decides that he wouldn’t want to skip past any of it.
After all, he’ll take every second with Dustin that he can get.