Chapter Text
He'd always wondered what would've happened had he been born as a different person, or even, if he had stayed as is, just changing his decisions. If, whenever his mother would gather around with her friends, they hadn't fawned over his looks, making constant mentions about his big round eyes and soft baby cheeks. If the boys at his all-men institution had treated him differently or seen him as someone "manly enough". Hours could pass by during the day, dragging over to the night where he would just lay there and think, "what if I had a wife?" " what if I drank coffee instead of strawberry milk?" All baseless and imaginative questions because the reality was that none of those assumptions could grant him the wish of normality. Most heterosexual couples get married though they're unhappy with each other or themselves, which later on forces them to have children as a way to force them to stay together and fill the empty moments of their conversations, all for that to not work at the end. Maybe that's why so many families have dogs, people connect through dog conversations.
The only thing he hopes for, really, is to not die from a heart attack in the middle of a cafe wearing a black skirt with glittery make-up. Anton sat in front of him, with some dark denim washed jeans and a black jacket that forms a sort of couple look around them. Wonbin knows he's fucked up at this point, though he already came to reality the night before, begging and crying to his roommate about a cross-dressing make over sort of miracle. That morning, right before the meet up, Giselle and Ningning threw him into a world never seen before; filled with hot flat irons that burned his hair, bras filled with socks—because the silicone breasts he bought through amazon hadn't worked— and a whole lot of blush and music to make the whole experience even more nightmarish. He'd trembled there—dick tucked into women's underwear—sitting on the middle of their living room, clothes tossed that laid on the floor as if a murder had taken place, and in a way it sort of did.
That morning, Wonbin had died, and in his place, that poor and skinny body of his was used as canvas for a new birthed woman. Binnie was she and she was the person Anton came in contact with that day.
"You're even cuter in person. Wow," he said, first thing with a flashy and satisfied smile plastered on his face. Anton didn't take his hands out of his body, wether it was his waist or his shoulders or his palms as they sat drinking sugary lattes and sharing a singular piece of cheesecake. Silently he prayed his sweaty and veiny hands didn't give him away or his shitty pitched up voice he lowered to whispers enough to not be heard.
"You've never told me what you do for work" Anton asks, his eyes observing him drink out of his straw, most likely noticing the tremble on his lips from the question. Wonbin's eyes trail everywhere; the black jacket, brown hair, wooden floors, graffiti styled walls. All in desperation of an answer.
"Tattoo artist"
Anton's head tilts in joy, like a puppy that just heard all his favorite words.
"Really?!"
And that's when he realizes, another one of his lies has fucked up his life.
"I've been wanting to get a tattoo for a while. That's amazing. You're so cool Binnie"
"A-ah, nice"
"Since when do you tattoo?" he asks.
Starting tomorrow with a full course apparently.
"College" he answers shortly.
"Where do you work?"
"Um..freelance" Wonbin avoids eye contact when saying that.
He feels bad for Anton, the conversation was lukewarm compared to their texts. Blame it on the nerves or Ningning's bra poking his back and digging on his shoulders. Anton talks about his life in New Jersey, nothing new but also nothing disappointing. When Wonbin's not mustering up false statements, straining his throat and rubbing his legs desperately from the cold, listening to the guy chat about his hobbies and stories was more pleasing than he thought it would be. He's very charming and very handsome—which he already knew about before, but still. A shiver runs down his spine when Anton's warm fingers trace around his wrist slowly when he talks. Wonbin grins with a shy excitement, getting touched in such ways was new for him. Was this flirting? he expected it to be. It's a date.
Anton had decided for their first ever in person introduction to take place at the cafeteria they were in at the moment, saying it was a nice and simple place to talk, unlike his friend's place they would go to later, describing his group as loud, funny and unique…
"They will like you. Everyone likes a pretty girl" he states. "By the way, have you always worn this much make up?"
"Uh…yeah" says Wonbin who got his eye poked out just so he could girlier.
"Cool"
What else can he say. The cheesecake is done, their drinks are drained and if he doesn't stop fidgeting on his seat then his dick will pop out somewhere. So he does the bold move of standing up and grabbing Anton's arm.
"You want to go?"
Wonbin nods.
"He-he, cute" Anton beams.
It would've been better if they headed to his friends place faster and Wonbin silently prayed it wasn't some dumpster or haunted hill where his organs would get taken away. Instead, they make out for an eternity by a typical alleyway of a 2000s rom-com, where the main characters kiss after a long fight or moment of sexual tension. Anton's hot tongue opened his mouth, big lips making him gasp and grasp onto his shoulders. Their size difference—with his body trapped between the wall and the other's tall body—made him believe he was an actual girl; petite and pretty. It was strange how good that made him feel. Would it be weird to say he had never kissed before that? Certainly Anton didn't know that or else he would've gone slower or waited till the second date—if the opportunity even existed. In a moment, he feels the other's knee separating his legs as if to press it right on the middle, to which Wonbin reacts quickly and hardly slaps his hand over it.
"I-I think we should leave" Wonbin breaths out, his cheeks blushing over the artificial powdery one placed on his face hours ago by Giselle.
"Did you not like it?" Anton asks him, pupils gleaming with something inexplicable.
Wonbin shakes his head, soon Anton's thumb rubs over his cheek. Their eyes connect for various long seconds and it felt as if another kiss was incoming but it didn't. The taller grabs him, interlocks their fingers and guides him on whichever direction he will trust him to take him to.
Help me. God.
He prays. It has become habit, but it's only a cry for guidance.
………
So he has everything rehearsed. Same old story. Anton and he met through social media, he's a sweet 20 something year old girl named Binnie, who's now a tattoo artist that loves pastels but decided to go alternative for once wearing black and doesn't use Instagram because it's for devil worshipers, very unlike her, a total hardcore religious angel.
Anton notices him pacing out and shakes his hair affectionately.
"Don't be nervous"
"Okay" Wonbin smiles.
"You're all good," the other remarks. "Just don't accept anything they give you"
"Huh?"
Before he can even ask about that last comment, the front door of the place they'd been standing in front of opens, revealing a short girl greeting them enthusiastically.
"Ahhhh! Anton!"
"Hi, noona!"
The hug that they give to each other is warm, like two siblings who'd hadn't seen each other in a while. Wonbin awkwardly smiles and waits for their exchange to end so he won't feel as much as an outsider. The girl turns to look at him and nods coquettishly.
"Quite the model you have here. What's your name cutey?"
"Binnie" he mutters out the fake name.
"Aw so cute. I'm Sooyoung, if you get bored of him text me, okay?"
He can only laugh, sort of. This was different then what he expected. Maybe the girl was joking and maybe Anton's sudden grip on his waist wasn't out of possessiveness but regardless, the comment let him be a ease. Model he thinks. He should've used that excuse instead of tattoo artist.It all leads that this evening will ne nice; nice and chill. They make their way inside the apartment and he starts taking off his shoes, hearing some of the laughter at the end of the entrance hallway, possibly over at the living room. A group of friends he's never met waiting for him.
"So we have chips and soda, also some drinks if you want" Sooyoung, tells him. He nods, listening closely to what she says. They make their way towards the living room and Anton runs forward. Screaming the loudest he can "What is up!!" which Wonbin would've laughed at too if only he hadn't seen him.
"Oh"
Paused, frozen even, he locks eyes with Shotaro.
"Oh!" Shotaro shouts, in his typical nature.
Fucking hell.
Anton notices and looks back and forward between them, confused.
"Do you know each other?"
Wonbin pleads with his eyes for Shotaro to say no, quickly shaking his head and hugging Anton's arm, his fake boobs pressed against it. The air leaves his lungs, because right in that room his lie could get revealed with just a word out of his friends mouth "Wonbin?" and that would be it. Bye, bye Anton.
Thankfully, the other doesn't do so. He lays back on his seat slowly, mentally trying to ask himself what was going on.
"N-no….s-she looks like a friend I have" Shotaro explains.
"Binnie has a doopleganger I met the other day" Anton exclaims excitedly.
Shotaro does that awkward smile he does when something doesn't make sense in his head; Korean words he hasn't heard yet, uncoordinated statements and in this case…the presence of his friend in women's clothing. "Binnie?" he asks, eyes penetrating Wonbin's soul.
He knows. Of course he does.
Anton's oblivious to it, or he could be pretending to be. Before Wonbin can even turn around and look for the nearest exit, the taller quickly grips his shoulder and announces to the entire room about his presence.
"Everyone, this is Binnie and Binnie these are my friends"
He forces out a grin. A group of eyes focus on him and greet him kindly and straight away he fixes on the mistakes of his entire scheme. The scars on his legs from falling so much as a child, his tall stature and that damn adams apple on his neck that Ningning forgot to remember when choosing his outfit. This was no good, he'll throw up the cheesecake at any moment. Both he and Anton get pushed towards the sofa and he's offered a glass of juice and what crosses his mind was the warning from earlier, so, he rejects it politely, barely moving from where he sits. What separates him and Shotaro is just one person and now the least of his concerns was his date, thought it should still be. A guy who he hears being called "Sion" starts talking to him about doing modeling once for a fruit commercial, with the belief that Binnie was a model out of some random fake fact being thrown around. Anton's chatting with some other friends, a beer on his hand and his phone on the other showing some TikTok video he found funny hours ago probably.
"I have to pee" he mutters admits the loud noise and makes his exit towards the bathroom.
When he locks the door the music muffles.
Breath in. Breath out.
What he wants the most is to go back home; go back to that shitty apartment, take off that shitty make-up on his face and finally be at peace. When he looks at his reflection the mirror, what he sees is far different from the girl he had built the first time he sent pictures to Anton. It's her, elevated but with an air of fraudulence that owns him. Wonbin's tired of holding on. Two loud knocks snap him out of his thoughts, confused he opens the door and once he sees who's on the other side he goes to shut it immediately. Shotaro's foot stops him and the entrance stays open; him trapped in that claustrophobic experience.
He gets the foulest look he's ever gotten on his life and Wonbin can't even utter a word.
"I know who you are. Wonbin," Shotaro declares.
"H-hi"
"Since when do you dress up like this? How do you know Anton?"
"…"
"Are you going to stay quiet, Binnie? I remember we gave you that name during college after you wore that wig"
It was true. Not only was he a shitty liar but he was also awful at choosing fake names. Wonbin leans his head down more and more, ashamed of being caught. Shotaro's mad, and worst of all he knows the reason why. It's not the skirt or the fake name or the fact that he's dating a friend but it's simply because he didn't tell him about anything and he knows it. Wonbin stays silent, Shotaro fixes some strands of his hair and fondly looks at his "costume", smiling like a father trying to understand his son who's gay and just got caught wearing his sister's clothes.
"I'm…sorry, really" Wonbin apologizes.
The other shakes his head. "You do know Chanyoung dates men too, right?"
"Chanyoung?" Wonbin tilts his head.
"Anton" Shotaro remarks.
Right..of course he has a real name.
"Hyung, can you please not say anything" Wonbin pleads. "To anyone, specially…um, Chanyoung"
"I won't…but for how long will you keep on doing this?" Shotaro queries.
"Ummm"
He scratches his neck and pretends to think, but his friend was no dumbass, and immediately recognizes what that means. Shotaro lifts his eyebrows, eyes widened.
"A week?"
"…"
"A month?"
"…"
"Jesus, Wonbin. More than a month?"
"…"
He sighs, disappointed, shaking his head. "You'll have to end this one day…Bin. It's too risky"
"I know" Wonbin pouts.
"At least you look good as a girl" Shotaro says, sadly for him, that was a bad timing. Anton appears in front of them, having just heard him. Wonbin looks at him in panic and Shotaro understands this could get misunderstood.
"I came looking for you" Anton starts. "You were taking so long…but, I didn't expect hyung to be here"
He doesn't appear to be pissed, just confused. Shotaro goes over to him and hugs him tight, leaving one arm around his shoulder. "Chanyoung, turns out I do know, um, Binnie. Yeah, she's a friend of a friend"
"Oh really?"
"Yeah.." He holds that tight gummy-bear-like smile that everyone likes. Wonbin thanks him mentally for softening the situation. What a smart guy.
Anton nods and grabs Wonbin's hand. "We were meant to meet at one point then. We can have double dates with Shotaro-hyung and his boyfriend"
"Oh! Perfect idea! I'll tell Sungchannie!" Shotaro exclaims, making his exit as if he's so excited to text his boyfriend about a double date when he'll most likely just inform him of the gossip. Typical couple things. His eyes follow him until he's away and raises them back to look at Anton, who's focused on him worse than before. He suspects something?
"Hello" Wonbin greets.
"Are you okay?" Anton asks, his voice soft and serene as always. Wonbin nods and raises his hands to his nose.
"The soap smells good" he states calmly, shifting the topic.
Anton smiles and grabs his wrist, laying his head on both his palms. What a sight. They giggle with each other, gently the nerves from before seep away.
"Lets go back"
And so they do. Everything calms down, they play one of those card games—UNO—and when they get bored of it they move towards "Guess who you are?" which both Anton and he lost. His friends are nice, they're funny. They're better than how Shotaro had described them from the wild night out stories. Wonbin even thinks they're all fake and made up now. Sooyoung is nice, Sion talks too much but he's welcoming and there's a guy named Sohee that keeps on fighting for a bag of Cheetos.
They're all cool.
Until the weed comes out.
Everyone cheers "Ohhh" when they see it and his brain takes some seconds to process what the contents on the zip-lock bag Sooyoung takes out are until they he sees Anton laugh loudly when someone says "pass it around". He looks at him worried but the other doesn't notice. Wonbin has never smoked a day of his life, not even during the hardest days at work when his aunt got dumped that one time by a YouTube influencer. Weed was out of his league but sitting right at on that sort of smelly sofa sandwiched between two men, he starts to understand it's very familiar for both his date and everyone.
"Will you.." he tries asking Anton in a whisper. He shakes his head with pressed lips indicating he won't, maybe out of respect for him, but Wonbin's sure that if he wasn't here he would've dived straight towards the blunt getting handed hand by hand; mouth by mouth. Wonbin shrinks back and holds his hands closer to himself. Anton leaves towards the kitchen to do who knows what and he's left sort of alone because his second confidant had left minutes ago before the weed made an appearance.
"You want some?" Sion asks him. Wonbin denies, shaking his head politely.
"Don't be so demure, Anton won't mind" he continues.
"I don't smoke" Wonbin replies. Big mistake.
"Oh, so the pretty girl is too pretty to smoke, huh. You're different from his exes" Sion chuckles.
Wonbin focuses on 'exes'. "How?" he asks.
"I don't know, Chanyoung used to date a druggie. She'd crawl over to people's apartments and eat their food. One time she stole Sooyoung's bag of goodies and ran away afterwards" Sion shrugs and presses the blunt on his lips, puffing out the smoke on Wonbin's face, making him squint in disgust. "They were part of the same band, he had bad taste back then"
"Band?"
"Yeah. Music band. Guitar, bass, drums. All that"
"Oh"
He was no fool, Wonbin did know Anton liked music, they met and got to know each other because of that. But never did he mention a band, or an ex girlfriend that stole things and god knows what other facts have been omitted of his self knowledge. It could be obsessive but he wants more of him and that greed he carries will burn hot on his body. If it's not one thing it's another, a rabbit hole he has fallen into dressed as Alice, entering a world he chased to be in. Basically, Wonbin is desperate for a guy and so…
In a flash he grabs the blunt from Sion's hand and takes a long pull.
"Ohhh" Sion whistles at the sight of "pretty girl Binnie" smoking. But an inexpert and his lack of skill can't hide the truth. Immediately, he starts choking, his lungs contracting from the unfamiliar and awful tasting air entering their pure and beautiful mass of life, screaming a loud "help!" he expresses with his gasps. Sion rubs his back and laughs, Sohee and a guy next to him noticing and cheering at him for smoking.
"Shit! Chanyoung's girl is dying" they titter.
Fucking hell. It really feels like it. Sion hands him a glass of something he doesn't know the contents pf but it was probably alcohol based on how it burned his tongue and almost made him throw up. He bitterly presses his mouth shut and grasps onto Sion's arm.
"What the.." Anton comes back, a bowl of chips on his hold and a concerned guise. "Who the fuck gave you weed?"
Wonbin breaths, trying to speak but failing he points at Sion.
"!You took the blunt from my hands!" the other complains at him.
"Sion, what the fuck dude?!" Anton does his own version of a "loud" and angry shout.
Sion raises both hands, clearly not wanting to get blamed. Anton reaches out for Wonbin and hugs him, taking the blunt out of his weak hold. "Are you okay?" he asks and by then Wonbin could inhale better but he was scared something weird would happen to his body. The good mood has died down. His friends look at each other with that look that screams "Awkward", Wonbin feels embarrassed.
"I told you to not give her weed"
"I only offered but she was the one who took it"
"Oh, so you offered. Look I know your boyfriend broke up with you but don't go around trying to hit on my girl"
"The fuck you mean 'hit on her'? I was just offering her the blunt. Chill out"
"You chill out on the weed you asshole"
"Says you!"
Both men start pushing each other, a fight itching to start at any moment. Sooyoung separates them quickly and screams about not wanting her place to be made a mess. Anton glares at Sion and tells Wonbin they're leaving and it all happens very quickly, grabbing his things, not even saying goodbye and his mouth tasting like disgrace, until they're outside by the street, shoes on and not feeling that well.
"I'm sorry, Binnie" Anton sighs. "It's just..this is not the first time he's crossed certain boundaries"
"It's okay.." Wonbin looks down at the floor.
"I know you were having a good time but smoking is not something you do without care. I'll have to find a way to sober you up" he says, arm draping around his waist. "How can I make it up for you?"
He doesn't know what are the effects of weed, Ninging knows more. A quick text asking her about certain precautions could help in this case, if he gets too dumb or too dizzy, giving her a warning call to pick him up was best but he stands there, Anton close to him, and he thinks about how he doesn't want the day to end yet.
"We can go somewhere else"
……..
A gigantic butterfly hangs from the dark and high ceiling. It's a metallic figure made up of thirty-nine thousand led lights, all programmed to light up at the same time to show case a pattern of colors. Wonbin lays there on an embroidered cushion on the ground, staring, mouth open and in absolute awe at the show presented up there. Anton's beside him, of course, but only one of them feels the effects of it intensely. When Wonbin said he wanted to go to some place, he'd expected a park and for them to sit there tranquilly until he sobered up, right before his bus arrived. Now he's glued there, presumptively "weeded out" and fawning about the life cycle of a butterfly that could kill him and his date instantly be it if the structure failed to do it's job and fell. Or maybe not, and they get to live and travel to space as they fly on the wings of a mechanical bug. Or maybe it's all an illusion of his mind and the gigantic butterfly is simply a big banner plastered on Anton's studio's ceiling and the led lights he imagines are the lamps on his coffee table that make their shine reach that same banner.
So what happened after they left—though he was sure they also got kicked out—was that Anton did try taking him to a park for some ice cream but Wonbin started talking about being too nauseous and when they bought the ice cream he threw up everything he had eaten that day which hadn't been much which is probably why the single glass of alcohol he drank hadn't done him well. Anton ended up calling and uber and bridal style carried him up the stairs to his small studio apartment. It wasn't a glamorous place, definitely not the fancy and large space he imagined from a guy like him but it was very well decorated, better than his own apartment, so he gives him points for that—also for his banner on the ceiling.
"Are you feeling better?" Anton whispers to him.
"Mhm" Wonbin hums happily.
High volume music plays from a large speaker of the room. He's very into the whole thing, as if he didn't care or simply forgot about being a lying fraud, high, inside the apartment of a guy he barely knew but also knew by texting for a while. Anton leaves his side to get him some water and Wonbin drinks from it, the lip oil he applied earlier that day washed away long ago. Luckily, despite all the commotion, none of the socks stuffed down his bra had moved. Or his dick.
"Antonnie, lay down" Wonbin whines.
"We've been laying down for forty-minutes" Anton replies, he smiles looking at him, suppressing back laughter. His fingers squish one of his cheeks and Wonbin scrunches his nose though he's really enjoying the touch. Their lips connect instantly, it's the second kiss of the day. Wonbin's hands grab gently from Anton's back as he hovers over him, kissing him and murmuring about him looking like a doll on his floor.
He stays limp, accepting everything; mouth against mouth, opening and closing and growing in neediness quickly. A few gasps escape out of him when Anton moves down to his neck whilst his hands kneed his waist. The shirt had lifted up slightly, revealing a peak of his skin. He's very turned on and intelligibly to himself and anyone, also touched starved.
Wonbin might be high and horny but he's no stupid cupid. This was their second kiss, at Anton's own place at that. All roads lead to the same destination and he knew where and what. He breaths louder, Anton never let his lips and hands leave his body and if Wonbin didn't do anything about it this could get bad. He was scared. Not just that but having sex on the first date…he wasn't that easy—anal videos and pictures out of the way because those didn't count.
What happens if he pushes Anton? If he says "I don't want to"? Will Anton kick him out? Ghost him?
His hand inches closer to the end of his black skirt, itching to draw it up, in all likelihood waiting to see his vagina and play with it. This was like texting old men all over again, he will have to leave Anton once he tries asking about it—or seeing it. Their tongues fight, Wonbin's own loosing against the other's.
The skirt starts moving slowly.
Oh shit.
He detaches himself from Anton, his palm slapping his arm away. Before Anton can utter a sound, Wonbin makes a statement.
"!I'm a boy!"
"…."
Wonbin's actually a dumbass and he's realizing that now.
Anton's shocked, at least he thinks he is because he's gone dead silent, mouth open, eyes looking straight at him. The room's not matching their energy because the music is still playing, very loudly and now he understands it might've been on purpose. Because there's no response, Wonbin makes a run for it.
He sprints up to run as fast, wanting to get to the front door.
"W-wait, Binnie!" Anton yells trying to stand up himself as he grabs his legs tightly.
"Let go!" Wonbin wails, dropping the girly voice act. Binnie is gone. He pushes away but Anton's stronger.
"We haven't even talked about it!"
"I don't want to!"
"But I ready knew!"
…Did he hear that right.
"What-uh what you mean you knew?" Wonbin stutters not understanding.
Anton hugs both his legs in a bear hug, like a crazy broke drug addict begging for money from his girlfriend. He hides his face between them.
"I knew you were a boy, I'm sorry. I didn't want to scare you away"
"M-me?" Wonbin jolts.
"Yeah…"
He pushes Anton's face away from his legs and stares at him with shaking eyes. The only question running around in his mind was, How did he know? or more like Since when did he know?
If it was because of the outfit he would sue Ningning.
"Can I…can I ask…how?"
"That time at the thrift store" Anton starts out. "I thought you just looked alike but I noticed you had the same phone case and necklace you showed me once and you also never called me oppa when we texted."
"…"
Could the ground swallow him? Because he really wants it to. Never in his life had he been as embarrassed as he felt right now and he's done many humiliating things. May this be a lesson to him to not lie without focusing on details, or matter of fact, to not lie as a whole.
"I'm sorry for not saying anything. I'm so sorry but I got really turned on by the idea of being with a cross-dresser an-"
Wonbin's knees buckle and he falls to the ground next to Anton who still grips on him like he'll escape at any moment.
"Are you upset?" Anton pouts at the verge of tears. He sandwiches his head between his two large palms, vision whole of Wonbin and that glittery eye shadow.
"I'm not, but..um aren't you upset at me?" Wonbin replies nervously.
"No. I-I really like you, Binnie"
"My name is Wonbin"
"I really like you Wonbin or Binnie. I don't care"
"You don't?" Wonbin chokes out.
Anton shakes his head and presses a soft kiss against his lips.
Tears flow out of his eyes instantly, all the relief, tension, anxiety and fears hitting him at once and washing away once the truth is revealed. He gasps heavily on Anton's shoulder, though he doesn't know why he's not mad at him for lying or why he's willing to have a grown man wearing a skirt cry on his floor and stain his jacket but he's there and he's rubbing his hand on his back to soothe him and that's the result.
None of them make more questions or more revelations—except he finds out he's older than Anton and gets worried about it for a bit. Calmly they drink lemonade Anton made the night before.
And of course they fuck on his floor afterwards.
The bra is gone, all the socks Ningning stuck and pushed down scattered. The eye shadow was still there and the mascara too, just now as traces of ink on his cheek from all the crying. He looked a mess. Put a mirror on his face and Wonbin would scream. But he doesn't need to be scared anymore, he's not a girl; he's not Binnie. There's nothing to hide or fake; His name is Wonbin and he is getting dicked down to the ground by his hunk online "boyfriend" named Anton.
"God, ah, Anton-ah!" Wonbin moans loudly. Even if he bites down his lip or hand, the way how Anton rubs his nipples and thrust down at him, prevents his attempts of secrecy from working. He gasps, head thrown back and sweaty, holding onto the last of his sanity in a clasp on Anton's arm. He said it beforehand, "I'm a virgin" but maybe Anton misunderstood. That maybe if he fingered him the right way and kissed him where he likes it, the whole act wouldn't feel like a rollercoaster ride for Wonbin.
"Hyung, fuck" the younger curses, he holds his waist and move his skirt anytime it shifts down, seeing that he had no intention of taking it off. "I love your pussy" he moans, biting the edge of Wonbin's neck.
A complaint about him not having a pussy almost came out of his mouth but a loud moan did instead. It frightened him how much he liked the idea of it to the point his toes curled from pleasure and satisfaction.
"It's so tight" Anton moans again, hitting a spot inside of him that electrified his insides.
"Ah!" Wonbin whined, his messy eyes glistering when he opens them in shock.
"So pretty. You, your nipples, your face"
"D-don't say that"
"Why?"
Because it gets him on edge. None of his dildos do this.
He kisses Anton to shut both of them up before any more praises get spout and in anticipation of his high screaming. That mind fucking spot gets abused by the younger, he never stops only to adjust their positions, hiking Wonbin's legs up to his shoulders and folding him in half. His dick bounces, hard and red and about to cum. Wonbin's eyes roll back, mouth gaping open out with no energy left to kiss. He weakly moans "Chanyoungie" and this one responds to his calling by pushing back his hair and kissing his forehead.
"I'm almost there Binnie. My sweet Binnie"
And it's almost like that's it for him to finish. Both of them. The orgasm hits like the best sensation in the world. His body convulses, legs kick and tussle trying to understand why he feels so good.
Officially Wonbin's no longer a virgin.
Anton breath's hot, he inhales and exhales down his neck. "Did you like it?"
But Wonbin can't even speak. Hi lays as a wet and used pile of tissue and can only blink at each word directed to him. Maybe it's the weed coming down, or the orgasm or the fact he no longer has to strain his voice, but really, when he looks at him now, Anton's like an angel.
"Your nipples are so cute" he giggles.
"Hmm" Wonbin hums, mind drifting off to sleep.
…….
He embarked on a journey the next morning to make a quiet exit. He moved one arm, then the other and then Anton's buffer ones away from him. Then it all failed once Anton noticed his shifting and pulled him back to sleep. Wonbin whined about not feeling good and when that didn't work he said he had work—obviously a lie—and Anton pointed it out so he shut himself up. They showered together on the very very small space that he wondered how Anton himself could fit into. The younger washed his hair and face and when he finished he moved down to his back and legs, scrubbing all the way up to the front purposely brushing against his chest. Wonbin's breath hitched anytime that happened and he wondered if the younger had a thing for breasts. After an almost boner session and some making out under the water, they got out and Anton burrito style wrapped him in one of his towels, guiding him out the bathroom towards his bedroom where he dressed him up.
"This doesn't fit" Wonbin pouted in complaint. The pants were too loose and the long sleeve he was given looked baggy. Matter of fact, the outfit was very boyish so he had an aspect of a little boy wearing his older brother clothes. But in this situation anything was better than going back to wearing a skirt and bra—which he couldn't find anymore and grew worried about because his roommate swore to kill him if he dirtied or lost her clothes.
Anton embraced him in a bear hold from the back, he trailed kisses from his clothed shoulders till he reached his cheek. "I love how girly you look even as a boy"
Was that a supposed to be a compliment? Sort of weird. Wonbin wondered but didn't ask. Anton was very cute that's all he cared about.
They eat breakfast at the place he and Shotaro had been at a while ago, same place Anton said he wanted to take him to. Though by the time they arrive it's more like brunch. He eats waffles with orange juice to calm his thirst and Anton feeds him food from his own plate to which Wonbin nags him for. "Eat your own food" he commands and the younger does so.
"Oh, hyung what about church?" Anton questions suddenly.
"Hm?" Wonbin tilts his head.
"Your aunt. You said she gets mad when you skip out of church"
Did he really believe that? Wonbin's not sure whether to reveal the truth or continue with the lie. Was it even necessary?
"Yes..I told her I wouldn't go because I would see a friend"
"Nice"
He'll let him believe for a little longer that he's a good church boy; not girl. He guesses if Anton knew all along he still sees him the same as before which is good for him and his ego.
During the meal he responds to the thousands of texts from Ningning asking if he was still alive and Shotaro questioning his life decisions.
Ningning roommate
Hello?
are u dead?
alive?
I will keep your skirt collection if ur ded
hello?
location?
did he find out?
Ill also keep ur ringlight
im alive
talk to u later
[sticker]
He switches to the other chat and it only gets worse.
Taro-hyung
Wonbin I left because sungchan got stuck inside the closet
I heard there was a fight
what happened? did Anton find out?
since when do you wear skirts?
will you like one for your next birthday?
do you think I will look good with one?
Wonbinnnn
No
bye
He'll ignore them for now. Right now he's focused on his second "date". It's almost like being on a train with several stops. The next one after breakfast was Anton's father's place. Big moment for him. As far as he knew, his dad lived in New Jersey but visisted the city every month for "work". Now, inside the very luxurious apartment he finds out what kind of work.
"Your dad does music?" Wonbin looks around fascinated at how clean and cool every corner and wall looked.
"Not a lot anymore. He own his own label now though" Anton replies, sitting down on a sofa chair and playing around with the acoustic guitar he grabbed from somewhere. He pats the spot beside him and Wonbin walks slowly to his side, cuddling with him.
"Why don't you live here?"
"I wanted my own space"
Must be nice to be a rich boy, Wonbin thinks.
"Can I get your number now?" Anton comments out of the blue.
"uhhh, sure" he replies warily.
"You know, because, I don't know, we're official"
Wonbin sits up right, back straight and focused. "We are?"
"Yeah" Anton shrugs.
"Oh"
He didn't know that was a thing. Anton hadn't even asked, or maybe this was his way of doing so? by asking for his phone number? He gives it to him and saves his name as "Chanyoungie" with a heart and continues thinking about how surreal this whole day and the day before had felt. Just a week ago he was thinking of converting to religion and going into a new career and now he has a boyfriend. Nice. Very nice. So nice they celebrate by fucking again but this time inside the booth of his dad's recording studio, because Wonbin was pretty and soft and Anton says his voice is so sweet he wants to record it for a song. Due to that, he sits on Anton's lap, a microphone hailed above them. The younger's fingers, lubed and wet, enter in and out of him.
"Hyung, I don't know why you lied saying you were a girl. With this body of yours, anyone would like you even if as a man"
"O-okay"
"Seriously, look how big my shirt looks. You're so tiny I can feed you some waffles and your tummy stays flat. Makes me want to stuff you with babies and make a family"
Anton was making weird comments; very weird and maybe concerning but the warnings enter from one ear and get out from the other. Wonbin's enjoying this; he enjoys knowing that the guy he likes wants to make cute babies with him and take care of him and fuck him till he's satisfied. It's the horny inside of him thinking for the ecstatic and happy body of his that receives three fingers up his ass like a fuck doll.
Things are going very fast. He still doesn't know much about Anton's exes or his previous band or how he and Shotaro met or how everything will go from now between them on but he's happy on the lap of a hot guy kissing him as a guy himself because his lie worked out at the end.
Total win for him.
Love wins.