Chapter Text
B jolted upright, his eyes flicking open. Another nightmare. This is the third in the last week. He looked toward the other side of the bed.
A’s gone. Well, that’s not unusual. He tended to get up to study. But there weren’t the usual tell tale signs of A getting up for the day. His pyjamas weren’t folded and placed on his pillow like normal, nor was his school books missing from their shelf; in fact, the room looked exactly like it had when they had fallen asleep.
Troubling. He sighed and got out of bed. If A’s run off and climbed another roof, B will be very annoyed. He checked the clock. 6:12am. Unusual for A to be up this early. He picked his jacket up from the ground and opened the door leading into the corridor. The orphanage was quiet at this time of day; most of the kids who were awake were still in their rooms, or mooching down to the kitchen to have an early bite to eat. The hallway lights were still flicked off but the light filtering in through the windows was bright enough to see by. B walked quietly down the corridor, turning the corner to head towards the library
A had no reason to study. Maybe he left with Watari. A made it pretty clear last night that he held no real affection or feelings for B. Unfortunate but… Well. It didn’t matter. B climbed up the stairs, careful not to make any noise. That weakling better not have gone through with it . B bit his lip and pushed the library door open.
Mostly empty… Well, it usually is at this time. B glared at the kids who were laughing in the corner. They immediately shut up and went back to pretending to study. B scanned the room quickly. A wasn’t at his normal table. He wasn’t at any of the tables.
Hm. The girl who is always near the third, fourth and fifth successors was sat crouched, reading in a corner. He took a look at the book… It’s the one that A recommended. B gritted his teeth at the irrational anger that brought upon him. Georgia Ruvie. 365512.
Linda shifted as she felt eyes on her. She glanced over the top of the book to see B’s eyes trained on her. Wait no, not on her, but just over her head.
“Linda, is it? Do you know where After is by any chance?” B said, approaching Linda with a smirk.
Linda looked shocked, taking a moment to gather her voice. “D-didn’t he tell you?” She had shrunk back slightly as B approached.
B’s smirk dissolved instantly. This girl’s stupidity wasn’t something B had the patience to appeal to. “Well, if I’m asking obviously he didn’t fucking tell me, now did he?”
Linda somehow managed to look even more scared than before. “He left last night…” She mumbled from behind her book.
B stared at her for a minute. Her meek stammering took a while to translate. “Right, I see. I don’t believe you, though. So I’ll repeat. Where is the current L?”
“I don’t know. Near told me that he saw A get on a bus… last night.” Linda cowered back, ready for B to explode.
“Haha. I’m laughing. Is this your idea of a fucking joke?” B scowled, slamming his fist against a bookshelf, sending it crashing to the floor.
Linda jumped in her seat, looking on the verge of tears. “I’m not lying.”
B’s scowl turned into a smile and he got even closer. “I don’t care what you say. Tell me what I need to know, Georgia Ruvie. And I’ll go away.”
“I-I don’t know where A is. I promise.”
“B, fuck off,” A voice sounded from the corner. Ah. Fifth place. How delightful.
“Nobody was talking to you, Matt,” B scowled. “But by all means, if you have something to add to this chat, go right ahead.”
He started walking closer. His eyes had bags under him and he looked as if he hadn’t showered. “Yes. I do actually. He doesn’t want anything to do with L, left the title to you, generally just a coward but I’m guessing he got that from you,” He scowled at B. “Oh and he left on a bus to the city.”
Linda took the opportunity to slip out of her chair and over to Matt while B was distracted, A’s book held tight against her chest.
B stepped forward, contemplating. It matched Ruvie’s story. A running away would not be out of character for him, due to recent revelations. Coward. Worthless, worthless coward. Well, in any case, he has no choice but to believe the worthless parasites. “I see, thank you very much for your information.” B said as he approached closer. They locked eyes for a second before B grabbed Matt by the collar and punched him hard in the face. Linda’s hand covered her mouth as she let out a frightened gasp.
Matt grabbed his nose and snarled. “This is all your fucking fault, B.”
“Maybe. Though, you had your contribution as well. In any case I’m finished.” B bowed, smirking “Good day to you both.”
Linda let out the breath she was holding with a sigh of relief as B left, her shoulders untensing.
“Fuck, I hate that guy.”
“So do I.” Linda sat back down her in her chair, opening her book to continue reading. After a few seconds she looked up at Matt. “I wonder why A didn’t tell B. I thought he liked him.”
“Maybe A finally wisened up and realised what a piece of shit he was. Unlikely though. I heard him talk before he was leaving, he still seems to like B for some fucking reason,” Matt grabbed at his nose again, wiping away the blood on his sleeve. “I think he was just worried about B finding him.”
Linda nodded, turning back to her book with a thoughtful hum. “I wonder where A went.” She thought aloud.
“Hell, hopefully,” Matt scowled.
Linda frowned at Matt, but didn’t respond.
“Ugh, I think my nose is broken. I’m going to go to the infirmary, see ya,” Matt stopped “Also, reminder not to tell Mello yet. We’re clear on that, right?”
Linda nodded. “Of course. I’m not an idiot, Matt.”
“Eh, debatable.” Matt smiled. “Though, I can’t talk seeing as how I baited someone with a history of violence into punching me in the face. So… anyway. Bye, Lin,”
“Bye Matt.” Linda smiled slightly at him before turning back to her book.
Near sat in criminal profiling, idly listening to Mello rant in his ear. He felt restless and drained from lack of sleep and Mello wasn’t doing much to improve his mood. So apparently Matt was using the fact that B punched him in the face as an excuse to miss class. It wasn’t completely out of character for him. Of course… Matt was also playing the ‘concerned’ friend and keeping A’s disappearance from Mello.
“...and it’s not like I can’t guess what he did! He must’ve provoked B again like the stupid twat he is.”
Near looked at Mello for a second before sighing and going back to scribbling down notes from the textbook. Not that there’s much point anymore. None of them will get the title. “It’s not really his fault that B is insane.”
Mello was tapping his pen angrily on his book. “Yes, but Matt always tells me what he’s done. Brags about it in the hallway. He doesn’t shrug me off”
Again, Near stopped scribbling to sigh. “Maybe the difference arises from the fact that B punched him in the face this time?”
“B’s punched him before.” Mello wrote down a few words of notes, too distracted by Matt and B to be paying much attention.
“You misspelt analysis,” Near said, resting his chin on his arms without looking at Mello, idly watching the specialist going through profiles of past criminals. Someone who worked with the previous L.
Mello glared at Near, scratching through the word and rewriting it.
Near glanced at Mello. He was obviously irritated, and not just at Near for once. Matt was being awfully condescending and Mello’s bound to find out eventually. Near placed tapped onto Mello’s shoulder before tearing a piece of his exercise book off. He grabbed his pencil and wrote, ‘A ran away. That’s probably why they fought.’
“I think the fact that that was a note should tell you not to overreact to that,” He hissed.
Mello glanced at Near, before pulling the note closer to read it. Shock flashed across his face but was quickly replaced with annoyance. “Why the fuck hasn’t anyone told me?”
Fuck. Near thought. And this was the fault in Near’s logic. “Matt was worried you might try and run away again.” He whispered.
Mello crumpled the note in his fist, throwing it back across the desk at Near. He picked his pen back up and glared down at his work.
Near eyed Mello, wondering if he’d made a mistake. No doubt, Mello will be angry at Matt and Linda for a while but that would have happened anyway. “I should have told you sooner. I’m sorry.”
After a few minutes of angry silence from Mello, the door to the classroom opened quietly. Watari stood in the doorway, eyes scanning the seated children. The teacher, Ms Aires, stopped mid sentence. She walked over to Watari and talked to him in hushed tones. The short conversation was one of furrowed brows, shaking heads, and subtle glances at the students.
Near glanced nervously at Mello. “Do we…?”
Mello looked over at them. He shrugged. “Well, apparently it’s none of my business.”
He’s pissy with me again. “I did just tell you, you know. It was Matt who thought you shouldn’t know.”
“You could’ve told me hours ago. You could’ve told me when you found out.” Mello glared.
Near brought his fingers to his hair, beginning to twirl one of his curls tightly. . “...If Matt had asked you to keep a secret from me, would you have just told me the instant you saw me?”
Mello hesitated slightly. “Depends on the secret.”
“I doubt you’d draw the line here,” Near glanced at Watari. He heard the mention of the word ‘Backup’. “They’re talking about B…”
“Probably about his rampage in the library. He’s supposed to be in this class.” Mello looked around, double checking that B was missing.
“Yeah, that’s probably it,” Near swallowed, A’s words echoing in his head. He only implied he’s leaving the title to B… but maybe he took more direct measures…? He gritted his teeth and began scribbling notes back onto his page.
Mello watched the conversation for a while longer, trying, and failing, to read their lips. He groaned, frustrated by his failure, and turned back to his work.
The bell rang before Near could finish his sentence. He closed his book and headed to the cafeteria, stopping to glance at Mello. Other than the initial reaction, he’s taking this way better than expected… Is he hiding something?
Near was right to be suspicious. Despite the outward appearance of vague indifference, Mello’s mind was whirling a mile a minute. Thoughts and questions were barely being formed in his head before being replaced by another. But one thought stayed, like the way bright lights leave spots in your vision. It’s possible to leave.
Near narrowed his eyes. “Cafeteria is this way,” Near gently tapped Mello’s shoulder as he began to veer towards the dorms. He’s always up to something. Knowing Mello he’s probably going to try some melodramatic shit and then Matt will talk him down.
Mello blinked a couple times, so engaged in his own thoughts that it took a moment to process what Near had said. He scowled. “I know that, you twerp.”
Near rolled his eyes. “That’s a new one,” He shuffled toward the cafeteria, his eyes still on Mello. But I can’t let him out of my sight, can I?
Mello dumped his stuff at their usual table once they reached the cafeteria, before joining the snaking line to get food.
Near sat at the table. He was rarely hungry at this time… or at all for that matter.
Mello seemed to be in a rush though...
Mello did seem impatient. His fingers tapped against his leg as the line moved slowly. Although, that could easily be blamed on what might be the most inefficient way to get food in existence.
Matt cut in the line and stepped right behind Mello, much to the annoyance of the kid behind him. “Hey buddy, what’s up?”
Mello refused to even glance at Matt. “I know A ran away. Did you seriously think I wouldn't find out?”
Matt paused, looking around to see if anyone heard that. This is bad . “Uh… no. I was… waiting for Watari to announce it actually.” Near? It must have been him. Fucking prick can’t take instructions, good to know.
“Right. Because you always wait to tell me things.” Mello crossed his arms, words dripping with sarcasm.
“For fucks sake, Mello. When L died you tried to run away. You know why I did it,” Matt snapped. The other kids were now looking at them and the cafeteria started going quiet. “Did Near tell you?”
Mello turned round to glare at Matt, not caring that the line had moved forward. “Who else would've fucking told me? Or does the rest of this god forsaken orphanage know what happened as well?”
Matt rolled his eyes and brought his hand up to his face. “Well, they do now, dumbass.”
Near stared at the argument in slight confusion. Well, he’s not being particularly subtle.
Mello’s jaw clenched and his hands balled into fists. “I’m not hungry.” He walked away from the line, only pausing to grab his bag from the table.
“What are you doing?” Near asked suspiciously. Matt strolled up toward the table, pushing someone out of his way in doing so.
“Why the fuck should I tell you?” Mello shot one last glare at Matt before storming out.
“Don’t be a coward, Mello,” Near said, loud enough for the entire room to hear.
“Uh… Near?” Matt said in disbelief.
Mello slammed the cafeteria door behind him. Linda, who had just walked in, was left staring at the aftermath in confusion.
“Fuck, where’s he going?” Matt sighed in frustration before pushing the door open to follow.
Matt found Mello in their room, sitting at their desk with a textbook open in front of him.
He raised an eyebrow at him. He just left to study? Well, that’s a relief. A bit weird but relieving. “Uh… you okay?”
“Fuck off.”
“Ah,” He smiled slightly before moving into the room and sitting on his bed. “Does it help if I say I’m sorry?”
“No. It doesn’t.” Mello didn’t look up from his book, even though he had been reading the same line over and over.
He’s such a baby. Matt rolled his eyes and sat back onto his bed. “It was fucked up of me but… you know? Even Near thought you were about to run away. Or like, shoot B. But that’s less cowardly and… not advised? I guess.”
“I don’t have a gun to shoot him with.” Mello’s body language hadn’t changed, but his voice was a little lighter.
Progress maybe? Matt shrugged. “Eh, I figure you’d find a way.”
A small smile tugged at the corners of Mello’s mouth.
“I mean, I’m down for shooting B to be honest,” Matt sighed. “Fuck that guy.”
Mello hummed an agreement.
Three days later
B sat in his bedroom, staring out the window. He can’t sleep. He can never fucking sleep. It was better when Adam was here. At least it gave him something to focus on. Now… In his hand, he clutched a single picture of the one known by the alias Eraldo Coil. Joshua Kale, 365580. He never thought of the paradox that being L would present him. There’s no fun in it; he knows he’s going to win. ‘Eraldo Coil’ was set to die in the next few months. A should have been L. But no, A gets to live a comfortable life and die in his thirties. Longest lifespan at Wammy’s.
His eyes went wide as the phone next to him rings. Blocked number…? He smiled knowingly and picked up the phone.
“Hello, A.”
“It’s nearly four. You should be asleep.” A’s voice was just loud enough to be heard over the faint noise in the background. An engine and the regular click clack of train tracks.
“Haha! That’s rich,” B grinned. “Why’d you call then, friend ?”
“You’re the next L; you should be able to figure it out.” A faint smile was clear in A’s voice, but it had disappeared when he next spoke. “I called to see how you are.”
B ignored that last bit. “Well, L didn’t figure it out did he? Who’d have thought that the golden boy of Wammy’s was so weak?” B’s smile only grew. “You should have seen the old man’s face when he gave me everything.”
A light chuckle came through the phone speaker. “I’m sure it was. Is that how I’m known now? The coward of Wammy’s?”
Well, B can admire his attitude at least. “Only to me,” His smile dropped completely. “Half of these worthless fuckers don’t even know that you’re gone.”
“Good to know you’re still just as affectionate when I’m not around.”
“It’s true.”
For a while the only noise coming through the phone was the train. Then, “How are you?”
“Angry. And bored,” B looked at the picture again. He isn’t sure who he hates the most at the moment. “And how are you, Adam?”
“Tired but… better than I have been for a long while.”
You should have jumped. “How sweet.”
“You’ll make a better L than I could’ve, Benjamin. A better L than even the original was.”
If I ever see you again, I’ll paint L’s grave in your blood. “You lost the right to use my real name, Adam,” B said tonelessly.
“I know you’re angry at me for leaving but…” A took a deep breath. “Look, you stopped me jumping and I never thanked you for that. So, thank you. That’s all I wanted to say.”
B gritted his teeth. “I’d say that I wish you the best but… that’d be a lie.”
“I know. I’m sure you can’t wait for me come crawling back to you once my life goes to shit.”
Actually, I’m counting the days till your lifespan reaches zero. “If I have one thing to tell you, A, it’s this. Don’t come back.”
“Where I’m going, I won’t be able to come back. Goodbye, Benjamin.” The sound of the train had imperceptibly been getting louder. Now it was nearly drowning out A’s words as though the train was nearly on top of him. The line went dead, the noise replaced with a soft beep.
B sat there. Somehow more angry than he began. What the hell does that even mean? He hates A. He decides that right there. He loathes him more than anything. More than he ever hated Roger, or Wammy, or L. He hates the fact that with two words, A turned his anger into nothing but a hollow emptiness. He’s never going to see him again. He’s never going to be able to break his nose or slice his throat. He doesn’t even know if he wants to. It’s all gone now. L won in the end and it was that coward who handed him the victory.
He stood up and walked over to A’s desk. B had gotten rid of all of his stuff when he realised A was gone. All of it except for one thing. A birthday gift from A. The book, ‘The Outsiders’, was A’s favourite… he’d annotated it and tried to get him to read it with him but… B never particularly liked it. He read it, and pretended to like it, for A, but it was too depressing. He grit his teeth and picked it up, taking a brief look through the pages. A’s notes were always so enthusiastic. It probably would have ruined it for someone else. Once he reached the last one, ‘I hope you enjoyed it!’ He felt a pain in his chest. Strange… he’ll never understand A. He grabbed a lighter from his drawer and stared at the cover one last time before setting it alight. The pain in his chest grew when he threw it in the bin, watching it all go to ash. This won’t help him forget but… it’s wishful thinking on his part.
Mello tapped his pencil against his teeth, leaning over the table. “That sentence is awkward. Switch the clauses around.” He pointed to which part he meant.
“They’re not going to care all that much about the order of our clauses in sentences.” But she changed it around all the same.
“And yet you change it,” Matt rolled his eyes. “You guys need to chill out.”
“You need to stop insisting your dumb philosophy of not caring about anything onto everyone else,” Near muttered, loud enough that Matt could hear him.
“Touchy,” Matt raised an eyebrow at him.
“The nuances of language are important, Matt.” Mello sat back down in his chair, pencil still tapping.
“Pfft. The nuances of language can suck a dick,” Matt smirked at Mello. He seems better. Less pissed off. Matt briefly caught Near narrowing his eyes at him but it was gone in a flash.
“The nuances of language don’t have mouths to suck a dick with.” Mello shot back in good faith.
“The nuances of language manage anyway because the nuances of language don’t give a flying fuck,” Matt smirked.
“The nuances of language would like to ask you kindly to shut up.” Linda tucked her hair behind her ear.
“I’d agree with the nuances with language,” Near said flatly. “Are we done then?” He looked toward Mello and Linda, blatantly skipping over Matt. Fuck you too, snitch .
“Well if we are then I’m going to the loo.” Mello stood up, pencil still hanging out his mouth.
Matt raised an eyebrow. “Uh… okay. Don’t we have to present in like, fifteen minutes?”
Mello gave him an odd look. “Jesus, how long does it take you to take a whizz? I’ll be back before we have to present. Calm down.”
Matt bit his lip and was about to reply before deciding against it.
Mello walked out the room, waiting for the door to close behind him and block him from view before he started to run down the corridor and back to the dorms. He had a countdown in his head, the seconds ticking away. After five minutes they’d wonder where he was, ten and Matt or Near would start looking for him, fifteen and they’d tell someone. And he’d get caught. He skidded to a halt once he reached his room. The duffel bag was under his bed where he’d left it. All his clothes and important possessions were inside. Now all he needed was money.
He knew where Matt kept his. It was inside a ceramic piggy bank, shaped to look like a mushroom from one of his stupid video games. It was the kind with no plug to get the money out, the kind you had to smash. He felt a pang of guilt when he broke it but didn’t hesitate as he gathered up the notes lying amongst the broken shards. He shoved the money into his pockets and left the room with his bag.
Five minutes had passed.
It didn’t take Mello long to get to the entrance of the orphanage. The gates were unlocked during the day and everyone was in their classrooms. All he had to do was push them open and start walking. That was exactly what he did.
By the time fifteen minutes had passed, Mello was already on a bus out of the city. He, like A, rode the bus until it’s last stop before transferring to another to get even further away. And he, like A, didn’t look back once.