Chapter Text
It had been a while since Jaehyun last saw Taeyong, or even heard from him for that matter. Even when Jaehyun called daily for at least a week there was no reply, and he couldn’t figure out why. Eventually, that week became a month, then became two months. In the meantime, Jaehyun and Doyoung’s relationship grew, and the pair spent more and more time together. However, as perfect as life felt, a part of Jaehyun missed Taeyong. Maybe if he knew why he stopped messaging, or maybe if he had some form of closure things would have been easier. Maybe if he hadn’t broken his heart, came back, and tore it out his chest again, it would have been easier.
Slowly however, although the yearning was still there, Jaehyun dedicated less time to attempting to make contact with or even think about Taeyong - and that’s exactly when he called.
“Hello?” Jaehyun was eating breakfast at the time the unknown caller tried to reach him, “Who is this, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“It’s me,” an all too familiar yet foreign voice replied, “Taeyong,” he added with a small, seemingly fake laugh, “Forgotten about me already?”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” Jaehyun said with a fairly neutral voice, he wasn’t quite sure what to feel, “I didn’t recognise the number.”
“Of course! I completely forgot, I changed my number,” He didn’t provide a reason.
“Well, it’s been quite a while, what made you call?” Jaehyun tried to hide the bitterness in his voice.
“Oh you know, I’ve just been busy, sorry.” That was clearly a lie, Taeyong had been avoiding any contact with both Jaehyun and Doyoung. After hearing about Jaehyun’s feelings and remembering his past with Doyoung, he thought it would be better not to be involved with either of them again, to avoid any more damage. But it had been so long, he just needed to see him, “Can I see you? Just as friends.” Taeyong wanted to kick himself, of course it was just as friends, what else could it be?
“Oh!” Jaehyun’s voice seemed to perk up, “I would love that,” he said, before adding with a little less excitement, “I’ve missed you, you disappeared without a word when you were here, Doyoung said he fell asleep and when he woke up you were gone.”
Before he knew it, things felt normal again as he got into Taeyong’s car, greeting the other with a quick hug. The car was already at the perfect warmth, and Jaehyun relaxed instantly as Taeyong began to drive. He wanted so desperately to pry for the truth while they made small talk, but decided it would be best to save that for their destination.
Unsurprisingly (despite how hard Taeyong tried to hide it), they ended up at their usual café, with their usual orders. When they arrived, Jaehyun wasted no time before initiating a proper conversation.
“So, you wanted to see me.” He said, briefly looking down at his drink to avoid eye contact.
“Yeah,” Taeyong looked down too, “I feel like I owe you an explanation.”
“About?”
“About why I’ve been avoiding you-“
“Avoiding me? I thought you were busy?”
“Yeah. Avoiding you.” Taeyong sighed, “I don’t know why, maybe it was to save my ass,” He shrugged, “But Doyoung didn’t exactly tell you the truth about when I was at your place.”
Jaehyun frowned, “I’m not sure I get what you mean.”
“I mean, he didn’t just fall asleep and wake up to me gone,” Taeyong looked uncomfortable, “You fell asleep, he and I got talking.”
Jaehyun nodded for Taeyong to elaborate.
“Well, he hinted that you still have feelings for me, and that he and I have some sort of past...”
Jaehyun laughed nervously, “I’m sorry, what? He told you that? He really said I have feelings for you? You said he hinted, what does that mean?”
Taeyong decided it wasn’t his place to tell him the dream and chose to shrug instead, “I guess he could have just figured it out.”
“Right...” Jaehyun looked a mixture of sad and confused, but he wanted to know the rest of Taeyong’s explanation, “What else?”
“Ah, he and I figured out that we knew each other from somewhere...” If Taeyong looked uncomfortable before, there was no possible word to describe what he looked like now, “We hooked up. Once. Before you and I were a thing, if that’s a worry, which I totally understand if it is worrying because I mean that whole thing with Winwi-“
“Oh... I guess it makes sense why you wouldn’t want to see either of us then, after everything.” Jaehyun felt absolutely deflated, overwhelmingly sad all of a sudden. For a second he looked angry, but almost instantly his face became neutral again, more puzzled than anything, “So, he told you I might have some feelings for you.”
“Yeah, he did.”
“But I still have feelings for Doyoung?”
“Do you?”
Jaehyun stared at one spot in the table. Suddenly, he was being confronted about the one thing that had been troubling him ever since he met Doyoung. He had feelings for two people, equally. He loved Doyoung, but he still had feelings for Taeyong, which the latter was aware of. How was that even possible? “Yes, I have feelings for you both.” But how? There was no working around it, it was the truth, but nothing could ever happen, right?
Jaehyun’s endless train of thought came to an abrupt halt when he felt warmth against his lips as Taeyong suddenly kissed him, and it felt perfect. Maybe it was because they had done this before, or maybe it was something else, but either way Jaehyun melted into the kiss, leaning over the table to rest his hands on top of Taeyong’s.
They held hands for a moment, still kissing like nothing had ever changed in these past months, before breaking the kiss.
Their hands were still connected, and the pair sat, beaming at each other for a few minutes before a quiet “Oh no,” cut through the atmosphere and Jaehyun broke away, standing up.
“I shouldn’t have- I shouldn’t have come here, I’m so sorry.” He put his coat on and headed for the door.
“Don’t you need me to drive you?” Taeyong looked slightly hurt.
“It’s okay, I’ll walk,” Jaehyun walked back over to the table to leave the money for his half of the bill, avoiding eye contact. His heart couldn’t handle eye contact right now, especially as he caught a glimpse of Taeyong’s tearful eyes as he walked out the café and back into the cold.
When Jaehyun finally got home, his feet were so cold he feared they might have fallen off. He dumped his coat on the sofa as he unlocked his phone and searched for Doyoung’s number, quietly cursing under his breath as his fingers wouldn’t work properly.
He had to tell him, he had to, but it had to be in person. He dialled the number, and immediately felt like he was going to pass out. He had time to think about what to say, to prepare for the worst case scenario, but the sound of Doyoung’s phone ringing from Ten’s room murdered all hope he had left.
“Hello?” He heard two Doyoung’s answer the call, one significantly clearer than the other.
“Hey, I need to talk to you, I’m outside.”
“Oh, I’m actually at your place right now! Ten said I could come in and wait for you, we’re just playing video games,” Doyoung said casually, he clearly hadn’t heard Jaehyun come into the apartment at all.
“Actually, I’m kicking his ass at video games,” Ten intervened.
“Only because Johnny isn’t here,” Doyoung replied, laughing completely oblivious to the bad news he was about to receive.
“I know, I can hear you, I’m at my apartment.”
Jaehyun heard a noise of surprise and both Ten and Doyoung appeared in front of him.
“Hey, Ten, could you give us a moment?”
“Yeah... sure...” Ten gave Jaehyun one of those ‘don’t start any trouble’ looks as he went back into his room.
Jaehyun guiltily dodged Doyoung’s friendly kiss by pointing to the sofa, “You might need to sit for this.”