Chapter Text
Darcy made them tea and toast, both their stomachs tender from his long confession. They sat together at the kitchen table, watching the first traces of dawn creep through the window.
“If he was going to kill you, why now after so long?” She asked finally, blowing steam from her cup.
“I assume that Odin has spent a lot of time convincing him of my evil ways.” He rubbed his forehead. “I don’t know, none of it makes sense.”
“I can’t believe you had sex with your brother.” She made a face. “That’s just gross. I mean...hot, but gross.”
“You were disturbingly interested in the details, but hot?” He laughed weakly. “You’re joking right?”
“He’s a beefcake and you know I think you’re pretty.” She shrugged. “Look, I don’t know what you want me to say. I’m not a fan of what you guys did, but I think your dad is a deranged psychopath for punishing you the way he did. You weren’t hurting each other or anything, no matter what you say. You were just in love or whatever.”
He froze, staring at her across the table unblinkingly.
“Oh, come on Ja-Loki, damn that’s going to take some getting used to. You're really going to sit there and tell me this whole epic story and pretend that the whole thing was about power? It’s pretty obvious you were both insane about each other.” She shook her head. “Men.”
“No..I...”
“This girl is wise, Loki.” Thor stirred on the couch, eyes struggling to open. “You should listen to her.”
Loki walked to the couch uneasily, standing ready to run.
“I came for you.” Thor reached a hand up towards him. “Father closed one way to me, but there are others. Hidden, secret ways.”
Loki grasped the outstretched hand, holding it tightly in his own.
“Why?”
“I love you, Loki. You’re a part of me.”
“Oh.” His legs took the news badly, dropping Loki to his knees. “You helped to cast me out.”
“Nothing I said was untrue. Loki, there are things you need to know.” He coughed and Loki flinched at this weakness. What had Thor gone through in his absence? “You really aren’t my brother. Father told me after he imprisoned you. You’re not even Asgardian.”
“Then what am I?” He swallowed. “Is that why I never...why I never fit in?”
“Father found you in a temple after the war with Jotunheim, an abandoned son of the frost king himself.” Tenderly, Thor caressed Loki’s face. “He adopted you, I think mostly out of kindness, but there were other, darker motives.”
“Jotunheim.” Loki repeated dumbly, one hand reflexively going to his chest. “That’s what Odin did to me. He locked down my true self. My magic...all my true abilities were a part of my real heritage.”
“Oh, hey that’s kind of good news right?” Darcy smiled brightly. “It means you guys aren’t really related so the ick factor goes down like twenty percent.”
“Not the time, Darcy.” Loki laid his forehead against the couch cushion. “I can’t believe it.”
“Oh well, sorry.'scuse me for living.” She snorted. “Look, you guys work it out, I’m going to bed since it’s like dawn. Explain it to me over lunch tomorrow.”
When she was gone, Loki slowly raised his head again. The tender expression on Thor’s face sent shivers down his spine.
“You looked for me.” He managed. “You nearly died.”
“I didn’t want to live without you.” Thor shrugged as if this was as simple and obvious as breathing.
“I used you.” Loki choked, pressing his lips to Thor's captured fingers.
“You loved me. Love me still, I hope.”
“How can you know that?” He protested. “You don’t know what I thought, what I planned...”
“Yes, your very dangerous plans of helping me rule Asgard without burning it to the ground.” Thor shook his head. “I learned a long time ago that the God of Lies often deceives even himself. You risked everything to be with me, came up with insane plans to catch me up when you already owned every part of me. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.“
“That’s not love, it’s obsession.” Loki countered, but it lost it’s sting as he leaned forward and kissed Thor. Time had not dulled the intense desire he had for him and the kiss burned through them both.
“No one knows I have come, but I have spent this year paving the way to return you to Asgard. There are those that will accept you and we will find a way return your power. Now that you know it’s origins, you may even be stronger.” Thor began immediately, struggling to sit up. “We can make haste and return in a matter of hours now that the path is clear.”
“Home?” Loki looked at him baffled. “Thor, this is my home.”
“Don’t be foolish.” Thor looked dismissively around the cluttered little apartment. “You are still a Prince of Asgard, your place is by my side when the crown comes to me, not in this terrible exile.”
“I have friends, a job, school...people that care about me.” Loki couldn’t let go of Thor’s hand, the warmth was a seductive promise, but he would be damned if he would let Thor take control of his life. “I see no reason to leave, especially not to return to a place where I will have to fight every step of the way for my right to exist.”
“What about me?” Thor pleaded. “Loki, please...I need you.”
“Stay with me.” The idea was ludicrous and terrible. Loki didn't care. “Stay with me, here, for a little while. You need to rest and heal, anyway. Stay a little longer and we can figure it out.”
“I am very tired.” Thor sagged back against the cushions.
Loki rose intending to get Thor something to drink, but their locked hands prevented him. Reluctantly, he let Thor draw him forward. They lay tangled together on the couch for a long time, their breath slowly synchronizing into sleep.