Chapter Text
10th November 1999 – 51 days until the year 2000
Dear Froggy
Levis mum isnt well so Levi has to stay with us this weekend YAY I hope she feels better soon. He is coming on Friday after school. Cant wait!!
Levi was sad and quiet at school today. Must be because of his mum but its ok I will cheer him up as best as I can. Because that’s what you do to the person you love.
Too tired to write anything else.
Goodnight Froggy.
11th November 1999 – 50 days until the year 2000
Dear Froggy
I can hear mum and dad arguing about me again. Dad thinks I should join a karate class so I can protect myself against bullies but mum thinks that is encurraging encouraging me to fight.
I don’t care. If I join karate, it will end up badly like when I did ballet last year and gymnastics the year before that. POO AND BORING. I don’t want to do any clubs that mum and dad force me to do.
Clubs that I would like to start myself and be in charge of where everyone is happy and cool
- Timestable club
- Pond dipping club
- Playstation club
- Rock polishing club
- Dictionary club
- Mensa club (cant wait to join)
- Jigsaw puzzle club
- Swimming club where I have the pool ALL TO MYSELF
- Reading club (ok we do this at school anyway but I want a club where me and Levi can read alone together!!!!)
Not ballet, not gymnastics, not karate or dance or sewing or whatever stupid thing mum wants me to do!
They’ve stopped talking now. I better go Froggy, dad will come in any second to read with me. I am going to tell him to leave me alone. I want to read by myself tonight.
12th November 1999 – 49 days until the year 2000
Dear Froggy
Levi is here for the weekend!! We have had a great night so far. Dad got us mcdonalds (MY FAVOURITE) and Alex let Levi pick which film to watch. He picked The Little Mermaid. That’s his favourite! Now he is having a bubble bath. Im waiting to go next. Not allowed to share a bath like we used to. I bet mum thinks we will start snogging if we are left alone. But I wouldn’t do that without a confess first.
Levi is going to sleep in the spare room like he did last time he stayed over. Im jealous he gets the big double bed all to himself.
Ok Froggy, I will let you know what we get up to this weekend!
The bedside lamp flickered as Hange turned the page of the diary with care. She expected a full account from her child self, detailing the weekend’s adventures with Levi and her family. But the diary jumped straight to the twentieth of November. A whole week without writing in the diary? What had happened? Her child self never missed a day.
Hange racked her brains to fill in the gaps. Faint memories danced in her head but it was difficult to differentiate between events; Levi had stayed over their house countless times and the memories jumbled into one.
But Hange sorted through the jumble and picked out snippets from that night; Levi had slept in the spare room but had woken in fright. Nightmares? Homesick? He had come running into her bedroom, the door slamming her awake and he jumped under her covers. She screamed in shock, waking the entire house, her dad came running frantically, her mum and brothers following.
How could she have not realised?
Hange stole a glance at her phone. No text from Levi asking her to come over for dinner yet. She brought the diary to her nose and continued reading.
20th November 1999 – 39 days until the year 2000
Dear Froggy
Messed up. Had an argument with Levi today. He came round on his bike like he usually does on a Saturday. I was in the middle of rock polishing but he wanted to play in the garden.
Levi wanted to play knights and princesses. Now I don’t mind that usually, Froggy. We have played Rapunzel and things like that before. I’m happy to play it as long as I get to be the knight or the hero. I don’t like being the princess and Levi knows that.
The princess always has the boring part. The princess has to lie down and pretend to be dead or gets locked up or has to stay hidden while the knight gets to run around and chase things and climb trees. Sometimes we even use a rock or stick for the princess instead of one of us! And we BOTH get to be heroes.
Most of the time when we play, he lets me choose the characters. I make up big stories for them and we play whatever I want, but he was being weird today. He said he wanted me to be a princess, locked up in a tower. He wanted me to hide behind the shed.
I told him that I wouldn’t be the princess in a million years. Then he got upset and said it was just one time, so he could save me and we could ride on his bike and pretend it was a pony.
I kept saying no but he wouldn’t give up! I got annoyed because it was so cold outside and I really wanted to check on my rocks. BUT HE DIDN’T GIVE UP.
Now Froggy, I don’t think I was THAT mean, I told Levi the truth. It’s all things he knows already.
He cant be the hero because hes not very heroic or brave.
Who is the one that gets rid of spiders? ME.
Who is the one that tells bullies off? ME.
Who is the one that starts crying all the time? Levi
Who is the one that gets homesick? Levi.
Who is the one that got scared when we saw Jurassic Park? LEVI!!!!!!!!
His face went all weird when I said this. I thought he was going to shout at me but all he did was pick up his bike and leave.
Was that a fight? It seemed like a fight. It feels like ive done something bad its feels worse than getting told off. Ive messed up big time Froggy. I thought I was telling the truth and he knew all that already but he got upset!
Mums right I talk TOO MUCH AND SAY ALL THE WRONG RUDE THINGS.
Hopefully we are still friends.
Actually Froggy, I am not sure what I would do if we stopped being friends.
21st November 1999 – 38 days until the year 2000
Dear Froggy
Levi hasn’t come round today. Bit worried. He always comes round Sunday afternoons after I finish at swimming for Sunday lunch. Think he’s really angry at me. Im going to try calling him.
No answer at levis house. Maybe he went out to play without me.
Got mum to try calling Levis house. No one picked up. Mum said shed keep trying.
Maybe he went out with his mum
Feel a bit sick.
I will say sorry when I see him tomorrow at school
DEAR FROGGY I AM SO HAPPY
Me and Levi are friends again!!!
I didnt eat breakfast because I was scared about what would happen. Then he didnt show up I was so worried when he didn’t show up for assembly. He came to school when we were halfway through maths when we were doing quiet sums and sat next to me like normal.
Things were quiet for a few minutes. I was too scared to talk in case I got told off but then he tapped my knee under the desk and passed me a note. Im going to stick it in.
To my best friend Zoë I am so sorry I was horrible you are my best friend and I missed you so much please don’t be angry at me I will be the princess every time please don’t be angry at me.
WHY WOULD I BE ANGRY AT HIM I THOUGHT HE WAS ANGRY AT ME
I was so happy that I jumped up and hugged him and said I was sorry too.
Everybody looked at me and the teacher got angry and told me to sit down but I couldn’t because I was too HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY
Don’t care that I’m in trouble. Don’t care that I had to stay in at lunch and do more sums. All I care about is Levi!!!!
Oops I forgot to write the date. not long until the new millennium!!!
22nd November 1999 – 37 days until the year 2000
Goodnight Froggy, I am going to dream about my best friend and true love
The diary ended there. Hange needed to sort through her moving boxes to find the next one. She cringed and reached for her phone. It was obvious to her now, as an adult, that Levi had many problems as a child. She winced at her younger self and the pathetic diary; she had been too self-centerd, hot-headed, and naïve to notice what was happening to her best friend and his mother.
But every child was like that, weren’t they? Plus, her parents had done an excellent job of protecting her from the harsh truth.
‘Are you home yet?’ she texted Levi.
‘Yeah come over when you’re ready.’
‘How was the supermarket?’
‘Fine.’
‘What’s for dinner?’
‘Why don’t you come over and find out?’
‘Are we pigging out tho? Do I need to put on my loose jimjam bottoms so I can stuff my face?’
‘You’re disgusting.’
‘Tell me!!!!!!!’
‘I’m making burgers. From scratch. None of that McDonald’s bullshit. Real meat and real cheese. Good bread.’
‘YUM YES. Ill be over in 5 just gunna get changed’
‘Fine.’
‘You’re disgusting.’
‘But you love me anyway!!’