Chapter Text
The journey to Nagoya takes two planes with a stop in Tokyo, 23 hours and five thousand pounds per ticket. Still, John is secretly glad that Freddie talked him into buying the more expensive ticket for the shortest possible journey.
He slips Roger's headphones over his ears against the pressure of the plane taking off. Roger is wedged in the seat between Freddie and himself. On their connecting flight, John can finally recline back and take a long deep breath whilst staring sideways at his equally exhausted husband.
Freddie's eyes are circled with dark bags but they shimmer with holiday delight. "Last time we went to Japan it was just the two of us."
"I know," John remembers it well, they used to travel much before Roger was adopted. It's their first time taking Roger out of the country, but John is more wrecked with nerves than Roger is, calmly listening to his music. Sometimes John wishes he could read his mind, just to see what he was thinking. But then he looks back at Freddie, who is smiling at him warmly, knowingly. "It's going to be different."
Freddie reaches around Roger to put his hand on John's shoulder, his touch seeps into John. "No need to be nervous, he'll be fine. He'll love it."
Sighing, John leans in close. "I know," he says before he pecks Freddie briefly on the lips in the privacy of their seat row.
Except one pair of eyes, of course. Roger stares up at them, blinking owlishly.
Freddie grins down at Roger, whilst he tightens his arm around John to pull him even closer. "What are you looking at darling, can't I kiss your dad?"
"I want a kiss too," Roger decides, turning his chin up, much to Freddie's delight, who obliges with a parental peck on the side of his face.
"Of course you can have a kiss."
"You can have two," John says, kissing Roger on the other cheek. "Happy?"
Roger snuggles under his arm, nodding, not knowing how much of an effort John has to make not to melt in his seat.
John raises his eyes to meet Freddie's. They gaze lovingly at each other, suddenly filled with excitement for the trip.
~~~
John worried about being a same-sex couple in public. He had googled for hours trying to find information about hate crimes in Japan, and Nagoya specifically, but nothing hadn't seen anything they wouldn't encounter in England on an odd occasion.
When they used to travel together they could pass as an odd pair of friends or mismatched brother in laws.
It's hard to hide with Roger sitting between them on the train, calling them daddies while he points at the city zooming by outside the window. They are looked at, politely, but nobody says a word.
Still, John keeps a tight grip on the shared luggage and holds his breath nearly all the way to their hotel.
"You're alright, dear?" Freddie asks subtly when they land with both feet on the train platform.
John forces on a big smile, taking Roger by the hand while Freddie reaches for the suitcase. "You never know if anyone's going to say anything."
"We're foreigners, that's all dear. Nothing to worry about."
"People aren't stupid," even when they aren't touching or actively engaging in romance, John always feels like people can tell. "They know something is up."
"So what, darling?" When John doesn't move fast enough, according to Freddie, he takes Roger as well as the suitcase and moves them orderly down to the escalators. "Roggie, tell daddy, 'so what?'."
Roger turns his head up and brightly tells John, "so what, daddy?"
John snorts, ruffling Roger's already messed up hair. "Nothing, honey."
"Are we going to the hotel now?"
"Yes," it's only a five-minute walk from the station, which isn't bad at all. John has remembered the map of the city and each street name in his head. All he needs is to count each block before he knows which way to turn. Before they know it, they are standing in the parking lot of their hotel. John looks at Freddie, offering to take the suitcase and get them checked in. "Can you keep an eye on our rascal?"
"Of course I can," Freddie deliberately brushes his fingers over John's hand when he passes the luggage over. "See you in a minute."
"They'll speak English, right?" John asks, expecting Freddie to roll his eyes at him. "I know, I know, ignorant Brit yada, yada, yada."
"They'll speak English," Freddie counters, voice brimming with love. "And you packed your Japanese dictionary, right?"
It's in his backpack, but he hopes he won't have to use it during the vacation, he keeps tripping over his words. "Alright, I'm going."
While he joins the queue at the reception desk, he watches Freddie encourage Roger to approach the large Koi pond kept just outside the glass doors of the hotel.
Freddie and Roger crouch down to stare into the water where Roger becomes fascinated with a white spotted orange fish.
John's mind is at ease when Freddie snakes a protective arm around Roger's waist to keep him from toppling in. "What's his name?" Freddie asks.
It takes no time for Roger to think, he doesn't take his eyes off the fish either. "Peter."
"That's Peter, huh? Not a very Japanese name," Freddie grins privately, kissing Roger on the forehead. "I like it anyway."
"Wanna show it to daddy later."
"You can show it to daddy, want to take a photo with Peter?"
Roger doesn't need to pose when Freddie takes out his camera to snap a shot of Roger pointing at his proclaimed favourite fish. John only manages to tear his eyes away from his two most favourite people when it is his turn in the queue.
They are given two keys and very polite instructions about breakfast and the facilities offered in the hotel. John is glad about the treatment, but even happier when he is finally able to call the others over to come and ride the elevator with him.
Freddie and John both lean against the walls while Roger is slumped over the suitcase. Jet-lag getting to them. Once the doors open on the right floor, John has to lightly tap Roger whilst Freddie holds the door. "Think you can walk, Rog?"
Roger refuses to be carried and quickly perks up so they can march over to their room, which turns out to be a two singles bed with a bunk bed for Roger.
Whilst Freddie and John stand frozen in the door, Roger toes off his shoes and immediately steals a pair of the fluffy slippers the hotel provided for John and Freddie. They are too large for his feet and he nearly trips on his face walking around.
"Not ideal," Freddie comments at the beds on opposite ends of the walls.
John slips an arm around him, sighing. "We can ask for another room if you want?"
"Don't want to make a scene."
They decide then and there to leave it for the day. They both leave their shoes at the door. John sprawls out on his bed while Freddie takes Roger into the bathroom.
With bated breath, John strains to listen when Roger giggles loudly over the toilet automatically opening.
"Papa!" Roger shrieks in delight, "again!"
"You have to take a step back then we can do it again, see?"
One second later, hears the tell-tale mechanic crunch of the toilet lid opening followed by bubbly laughter from Roger. "It's a robot!"
"Isn't it?"
John is sure Freddie snaps a photo of him there. When they both exit the bathroom, he also snaps a photo of John with his arse up.
"Hey," John waves his arm half-heartedly but is too tired to really protest.
"It's for the private collection is all," Freddie says overly innocently until Roger joins them in the main room again.
Later that night when Roger is already breathing evenly in the bunk bed, out like a light, Freddie moves over from his bed to cuddle with John. Both their limbs are heavy and drag tiredly over the other's bodies after the journey they have made. Nothing feels more like home than Freddie's warm breath damping the side of John's neck. He tries to bring Freddie closer, scraping his nails idly along the nape of his neck. If Freddie was a cat, he would be purring.
"These trips used to be such fuck fests," Freddie recalls in a drowsy slur. "Now it's like-"
John lets out a loving snort. "Can you shut up?" He wants to push Freddie's shoulder, but it would surely topple Freddie off the bed. "It's only been a day."
"And it should tell you how much I desire you."
John really can't bite bach his breathy laughter when Freddie nibbles gently on his earlobe. "Go to sleep, tiger. My son's sleeping in the bunk above us."
"Don't talk about him while I have my leg between your thighs."
John pulls the sheets more closely around them both, giving Freddie nowhere to go but against his torso. "Then shut up, will you?" John asks, kissing Freddie pointedly on the lips, warm and homey.
Freddie sighs against his mouth, his entire body sinking into John's with the last ounce of energy that kept him awake. "I love you."
Certain he has whispered something back, John allows the weight of Freddie to sink him into his dreams, lucid and warm.
He wakes up almost half a day later in the morning when Roger climbs down from his bunk bed to cuddle with them. He is careful not to knee them while he edges onto the bed. John makes it a little easier for him and pulls the sheets back for him to fit under.
"Morning daddy."
John unwinds his arm from Freddie to pull Roger closer with a sigh, signalling for him to whisper. "Good morning, Rog. Let papa sleep for a little longer or he'll be cranky all day."
Roger tucks his head under John's chin, happy to snuggle up. "Like a little baby?"
"Yes," John kisses his hair. Excited for their first day in Japan as a family. "Like a little baby."
~~~
"Hi Peter," Roger says to the Koi fish while they are outside the hotel parking lot, Roger drags him back by the arm, insisting he does. "Daddy say hi to Peter."
After a brief introduction, and admittedly, Roger did pick the most beautiful fish to admire, John tries to put his family back on course to the metro station. "We'll see Peter again tonight honey."
"Hi, Peter," Roger repeats again whilst he is being dragged away, John snaps a picture of them, while they are on the go. Roger slips one hand into John's and the other's into Freddie's so he's walking between them and swinging their arms.
"What are we doing today, papa?" Roger asks.
"We're going to the most beautiful place on earth," Freddie tells him, after they have made a d-tour to the corner shop for snacks. Freddie has managed to find something that looks like a dumpling made of spongy cake. He has a whole package of it, John declines it when offered, still full from breakfast. Freddie just shrugs and goes on with his story. "We are going on a quest to a big, beautiful castle."
"A castle?" Roger's eyes nearly bulge out of his eyes. "Really?"
"It's over four hundred years old, can you imagine?"
"That's even older than you, papa!"
John lets out a laugh, Freddie makes a dignified sniffle. "It's definitely older than me, darling. I am not four hundred years old." Freddie gives Roger one of the honey-cake dumplings from the plastic wrap. "This is a Nagoyan sweet, want to try one?"
Without second-guessing, Roger stuffs one of them in his mouth. He looks to be enjoying it, because when they step on the metro, with his cheeks still puffy and full, he tugs on Freddie's arm. "Another, papa?"
"Absolutely not," John cuts in. They make it on the train and he puts Roger on the seat next to his, to put himself between Roger and Freddie. He knows Freddie won't be able to resist if Roger pouts long enough and the journey is twenty minutes. "Go and sit down here until we get there, okay?"
Roger sticks close to John's side, eyeing the rest of the world with large wary eyes. It's early morning os the train is filled with people trying to squish in from the front all the way to the back of the carriage, at least they managed to find seats.
To keep him from sliding against the family sitting next to them, John protectively wraps an arm around Roger.
He gives Freddie a long look, sensing a distance between them, even when they are right next to each other. Their shoulders don't touch, not in front of the business people in sharp suits and pedestrians with lingering gazes. John gazes at Freddie, long and hard.
Freddie looks back, willing himself not to smile outright, but it is hard when they are both hit by the sun, with their son, in the most loving country in the world.
I love you, John thinks so hard that his chest hurts.
Freddie snorts, eyes twinkling. I love you too.
When John turns to look at Roger again, he is surprised that Roger has been offered one of the cars the boy on the seat next to him is playing with. They don't speak the same language, but wordlessly they play together, Roger with a big cautious smile on his face.
Roger doesn't really interact with strangers, and John finds himself watching over them quietly while they play their invisible game of cars and races.
John taps Roger gently on the shoulder when they made it to the right stop of Nagoya castle. "We're going, honey."
Roger does seem to hesitate before he hands the toy back over, but John kisses the crown of his head proudly when he has and the boy smiles gratefully at having been returned his property.
When they get off the train, John lets Freddie sneak Roger another Nagoyan sweet and he even pretends not to see the exchange.
"Who wants to see a castle?" John sing-songs when they are on the platform.
Roger jumps on his toes, breaking out into a large food-filled smile, "I wanna see a castle!"
John catches Freddie staring at him for a long unbroken moment, before his eyes lower back to Roger. "We're gonna see a castle!"
"Will there be knights and Cinderella?"
"Hmm," Freddie taps his chin. "Not that type of castle I'm afraid. We're in Japan, so it will be a Japanese castle, isn't that cool?"
"It's cool," Roger decides, sounding so excited that John's heart could burst.
~~~
After visiting Nagoya castle they go for dinner at what also turns out to be a karaoke bar.
The only reason why they decided to go and eat here was that their stomachs couldn't hold out for a moment longer before they would succumb to hunger. It also looked cosy from the outside with a welcoming atmosphere.
"I like this," Freddie comments while he takes off his shoes at the entrance to put into the slots. Roger proudly hands his shoes over so they can walk on their socks to their table, following their hostess.
"Look daddy, I'm not wearing shoes," Roger giggles whilst wiggling his toes trapped by his sock. "That's so cool! Japan is cool."
"Japan is cool?" John asks when they sit down, their hostess struggles not to break out into a smile at Roger's young enthusiasm. Freddie helps Roger climb into the adult chair. "What is the coolest about Japan?"
"Ninjas."
"Ninjas?" Freddie sits down too, their knees bump under the table but they manage not to smile like dorks. Finally, Freddie takes the menus from their overly-amused hostess. "Thank you," he says in Japanese before turning back to Roger. "Where did you see ninjas, dear?"
"You can't see them, they are too quick."
"You know what, he does make a point there," Freddie tells John, nodding very seriously. Also turning to their waitress, who arrives moments later to offer them a drink. In somewhat stuttered but certain Japanese, Freddie says something along the lines of, "could we have two of the best on your menu, and a mild ramen for my son please?"
"Of course," her English is as bravely attempted as Freddie's Japanese. They both give glow in each other's delighted practice. "I will be back," she promises, collecting their menus again.
Once she leaves, John actually raises an eyebrow at Freddie. "How did you know what I wanted?"
"I didn't, just told her to get some of the chef's best for us and a soup for Roggie here. You like that?"
"Yes," Roger concludes. "And more Nagoyan cake!"
"No more cake," John doesn't like being the bad guy, but someone has to when Roger pulls out an impressive pout and Freddie practically melts instantly. "You need real food to get big and strong like your papa."
"Papa eats sweets all the time," Roger concludes, like that is not fair.
"Papa should not eat sweets all the time either, but he isn't my son, you are," John snorts, he won't openly admit that he enjoys seeing Roger assert his opinions and try to reason with him. His confidence and sense of self strengthen. John grabs Roger by the hand and kisses it. "Ninjas don't eat sweets, they just eat veggies and drink milk."
"Really?"
"Really. They need to stay strong and exercised."
Roger remains somewhat sceptical until the food is served and they are sufficiently distracted from the talk. John produces a plastic spoon and food for Roger from his bag, which would help him eat.
It is some of the best food John has ever had, even when they have been in Japan before. He really has to make an effort to bite back any obscenities. Freddie seems to be in the same boat, squirming under the seat and subtly adjusting himself. Bursts of pure flavour and colour free themselves on the soft slick texture of his tongue, this is all he can think of, the bliss of food. Up until there is sudden microphone feedback, followed by their hostess from before standing on a small set platform as a stage, front and centre of the restaurant.
A series of applause rings around, more hesitantly by John and his family.
"Welcome," the hostess says in Japanese, then in English. "Welcome to the Thursday night karaoke night."
"Karaoke?" John whispers from the corner of his mouth exclusively to Freddie.
"Who would like to go first?" The hostess asks.
John waits for Freddie to answer him, but when he looks up, it is to Freddie jumping to his feet, addressing the woman with a shout. "I will go!" Then Freddie turns his undivided attention to Roger. "Want me to do our special song, Roggie dear?"
"Yes!"
"Okay but promise me you'll give me a big round of applause," Freddie kisses Roger on the forehead, before boldly turning to John and kissing the side of John's face in front of the restaurant. "Be my groupie?"
"Are you really going to sing in front of all these people?"
"Is that a no?" Freddie asks with a devious little smirk.
John smacks his arm. "You're not drunk enough for this."
"Roggie, wish papa good luck."
"Good luck, papa!" Roger shouts when Freddie pulls himself up straight and bounces towards the hostess on the makeshift stage with the karaoke machine. Roger's giggling madly, glancing with wide bedazzled eyes between Freddie and John, who is sitting at the table in equal amazement. "Is papa a good singer?"
John pulls Roger into his lap, juggling him sweetly so he can watch Freddie straight ahead. "Your pap can sing, yes," John puts his chin on Roger's forehead. "What is your special song?"
"The boat song."
The boat song, is My Heart Will Go On, a karaoke favourite in Japan. The small crowd of the restaurant bursts out into applause when Freddie takes the stage and the flutes begin the intro of the song.
"Every night in my dreams," Freddie grips the microphone, staring at an invisible point in the distance, acting with more confidence than he is feeling, but looking unshaken and strong. "I see you, I feel you."
John sees Roger mouthed along to the song and kisses him on the crown of his head.
Halfway through the song, Freddie turns his attention to their table, pointing directly at John to serenade him with a surprising control of his melodic voice.
Everyone thinks it's a little cringe, but despite fighting an embarrassed flush, John applauds the loudest in the entire restaurant when Freddie belts out the most important note in the bridge.
~~~
Jet lagged and tired from their long day strolling around the city, Roger slumps into Freddie's arms as he's being carried from the restaurant to their hotel. John holds Roger's shoes, watching Roger sleepily wriggle his toes while his legs swing loosely around Freddie's waist.
"Another Nagoyan sweet?" Freddie offers Roger before John can interject.
"You can't be serious."
Roger manages to nod and Freddie stuffs another dumpling into Roger's mouth. "It's a holiday, he can have sweets."
"Jesus Christ."
The streets are dark at this hour of the night and John is stuck between wanting to huddle closer to Freddie and fearing how their touches might be interpreted by the occasional stranger passing them on the streets.
Freddie feels his nervous energy, and eyes him wearily. "Nobody is going to jump us," he whispers.
"Roger's with us and I don't want to cause trouble."
He hears Freddie sigh, but he takes to John's boundaries with grace. John turns his attention to Roger, mostly because it is easier.
His eyes are beginning to droop before he's chewed through the dumpling cake.
"He's going to choke." John purposely brushes against Freddie's arm, wanting the comfort of his touch. "Jostle him a bit."
"He's sleeping."
"He's going to choke, Fred."
Freddie rubs Roger's back, gently waking him up with a few bounces. Roger's eyes flutter open and he continues to chew his food slowly like he hadn't really woken up at all. "We're almost back at the hotel, but you have to chew first, dear."
"I'm full," Roger concludes.
John sends Freddie a look. Freddie skillfully ignores it. "I know, I'm sorry. No more sweets for today."
"Tomorrow?"
"If we can convince your daddy," Freddie snorts, John jabs him with his elbow.
They get to the hotel moments later, Roger is dozing in Freddie's arms when they walk through the reception and past their beloved Koi pond. "Rog, say hi Peter."
Without opening his eyes, Roger murmurs, "hi Peter."
When they put Roger to sleep in his bed, he murmurs and turns his cheek into the pillow, and drifts off almost immediately.
The lights are still off in their cramped room, Freddie and John make it to the bathroom and exchange a quick flash of kisses with each other. The door shuts with a silent click, the lights switch on and finally, John is close enough to Freddie to see the specks of gold in his eyes and the laughter in the beautiful lines engrained on his face.
"Wanted to touch you all day," John chokes out.
"I know. I miss having our own bedroom."
It soothes him that Freddie sounds as desperate as he is, it warms his insides and sends him into a quick frenzy. Their hands wander down and under their clothes, touching and pressing John against the cool porcelain washbasin.
They kiss until their lips tingle and their bodies burst with quickly found pleasure through friction and years of familiar ease. "I love you," John whispers against the heat of Freddie's mouth, he is beautiful and warm. John pulls his leg around Freddie's middle, pulling him closer and grinding against his front, remembering to be quiet. "I love you," he peppers kisses along Freddie's mouth, the corners of his lips, his nose, his cheeks. He wants to taste him and the sweetness of his skin.
Freddie looks dizzy, his teeth wide and laughter breathless when he kisses back. "I love you too."
That night when they go to bed, John sleeps like the dead. Snuggled into his husband's side on their cramped single-bed. Roger is sound asleep on the bunk above them and none of them is worried for the rest of the trip anymore.