Chapter Text
Jaemin bites down on his lip harshly as the alcohol touches his back, a sharp sting bursting beneath his skin. Clenching his eyes shut, his whole body tensing up, Jaemin tries to keep calm and distract himself from the pain he was feeling.
After reaching dead-end after dead-end in their investigation, Jaemin was more frustrated and furious than he had ever been in his entire life. Then, having no healthy way to let out all the pent-up emotions, it had ended up with him starting a reckless brawl at the bar which ended up with Jaemin not only scratched up but him still feeling pissed about everything and everyone.
“You should know better than this,” Jeno whispers quietly, trying to be as gentle as possible while tending to the wounds that covered Jaemin’s back. He looks up, eyes meeting Donghyuck’s and he sighs seeing his own worry reflected in the other male’s eyes. “You’re too stressed, Jaem, you need to take a breather.”
There’s a scoff and Jaemin buries his head into his hands. “There’s a mad person going around trying to kill my brother and we have to solve that while still running the business smoothly, you really think this is the time for a break?” Jaemin lets out an ugly laugh, “I’m not resting until I find the motherfucker who did this.”
There’s a sharpness in his voice and it’s dangerous, dangerous enough to put even Jeno and Donghyuck on edge.
Donghyuck leans back into the couch he’s on, a foot coming up to rest on his knee. “Okay, fine, but you have to stay level-headed,” he says with a penetrating finality to his voice. “You cannot repeat what happened the other day with Renjun, there was no reason for you to point a gun at him.”
Renjun.
Just hearing the name was making Jaemin’s blood boil with anger and he rolls his eyes at Donghyuck. “That kid’s a cocky, arrogant little...” he starts, voice cutting off when he feels Jeno press an alcohol-drenched cotton swab onto a wound harder than he needed to.
“That kid is innocent,” Jeno firmly says, “you know how we run, we don’t get innocent people involved in our shit.” He lets out a tired sigh filled with regret, “we went too far with him in the first place, that was our mistake, I admit, but you shouldn’t have gone as far as waving a gun in his face.”
Jaemin stays quiet, he knew – especially with both Jeno and Donghyuck telling him off – that he was in the wrong, but he didn’t know what it was about Renjun.
He was infuriating.
He was tiny, so small, so petite, so fragile that it looked like just the softest breeze would topple him over but that was nowhere near to what he was truly like. He was strong, hot-headed and knew how to stand up for himself even in the face of death and it had immediately ticked Jaemin off, irking him in an unusual way.
No one stood up to Jaemin like that and never in a million years had he thought it would be someone like Renjun to finally do so.
“God, he’s just so fucking annoying.” Jaemin whispers, rubbing his eyes tiredly.
Jeno chuckles before gently patting Jaemin’s back gently, “all done,” he mutters, smoothing over the fresh band-aids covering his skin. Leaning in, he presses his lips onto Jaemin’s bare shoulder before helping him pull on a shirt.
“He’s definitely not…” Donghyuck narrows his eyes, trying to find words to describe the person that was Renjun, “he’s not the type of person we usually deal with, but he is an interesting character.”
Jaemin can’t help but crack a smile at that, opening his mouth to reply when suddenly, the door to the room flings open, revealing a panting Chenle, waving a phone in his hand frantically.
“Jesus Christ,” Donghyuck jumps up, his hand falling from the small of his back, “don’t creep up on us like that, Le.”
But Chenle ignores Donghyuck, stumbling into the room with teary eyes. With a harsh swallow and ragged exhale, he waves his phone again.
“It’s Renjun.”
Jaemin stands immediately, ignoring the prickling pain the sudden movement had caused, “what happened to Renjun?”
Chenle freezes, his frantic actions coming to a slow halt and instead a look of bewilderment spreads through his face. Eyes skittering around, he realises the concerned expressions the three men in front of him wore and he couldn’t help think how odd it was. “Oh? Um, nothing happened to Renjun…” Chenle mutters, voice lilting in confusion before he clears his throat. “He just called and said he remembered something from that night at the club He has more information on Jisung.”
“Oh,” Jaemin mumbles, realisation washing over him at his own unusual reaction. He quickly composes himself, back straightening up and hands digging into his pockets. “Well, call him in again, I guess.”
With an awkward smile, Chenle nods and walks out of the room, figuratively scratching his head at the alarmed reaction that Renjun’s name had pulled out of Jeno, Donghyuck and especially Jaemin.
Very odd.
This time when Renjun enters the NCT residence, it’s a lot more of a pleasant experience… well as pleasant as entering the home of the mafia could be. It had taken a lot of courage to call the number Chenle had messily scribbled down for him, scared his intentions were detectable from his voice alone. But, luckily for him, Chenle was more than happy to drive Renjun back to the mansion.
Now, here he was, seated in the large living area, being treated like a proper guest, a shocking contrast to his last experience here. He politely rejects an offer for a drink and keeps his head down, avoiding the scrutinising eyes of the security wandering around as well as the other members that were constantly walking up and down the hallways.
It’s only when he hears the squeak of leather that he looks up, coming face to face with Jaemin, Jeno and Donghyuck.
Renjun stares blankly at them and they stare back but there was something strange in their eyes that Renjun hadn’t seen last time, something that sent a shiver of discomfort down his spine.
It wasn’t a piercing glare, there weren’t any angry eyes nor any scowling lips and that was what was making his skin crawl. The three men in front of him didn’t look like the ruthless killers he had met last month, instead they seemed like ordinary businessmen, sitting down for a meeting.
He didn’t like it.
Renjun did not, in the slightest, like the image of them being regular people because if anything, it would never be that.
It’s Jeno who breaks the awkward silence that had settled upon them, eyes flickering to Jaemin and Donghyuck before landing again on Renjun. “Nice to see you again,” he says, voice cordial.
Renjun blinks, brows furrowing at the abnormal niceness. Eventually, Renjun resorts to internally shrugging the thought away, maybe they had decided to repent or something, not that it mattered much to him. He hadn’t changed within the last month.
And so, in response Renjun simply shrugs. “I don’t know if I can say the same back,” he mumbles, eyes finding themselves positioned on Jaemin. “No gun to wave at my face today?”
It was almost as if Renjun’s words act as a reality check and as soon as they escaped his lips, there was a synchronised sigh of annoyance that falls from the lips of all three men.
“Okay darl,” Jaemin snaps, “out with it, why are you here again.”
“Especially if you hate us so much,” Donghyuck adds, leaning forward with elbows on his knees, his hands clasped together.
“I’m here to talk about Jisung,” Renjun replies, his fingers delicately picking at the pieces of fluff on his sweatpants. He purposefully ignores Donghyuck’s words, instead launching straight into his story. “There’s something I forgot to mention last time I was here because it hadn’t stood out to me then but then a lovely man decided to pay me a visit.” Renjun looks at the men in front of him, eyes holding a sharp intensity and hips lips curved into a spiteful sneer, “I don’t enjoy being threatened, so I’m going to do exactly what he told me not to do.”
His words intrigue the boys and Jaemin can’t help but feel something nag in his chest at the image of Renjun being threatened by someone.
“Who was it?” Donghyuck asks, eyes narrowing dangerously. His unfolds his hands and lays them gently on his lap and just the simple action gives Renjun an impending sense of danger.
“Kevin Lim, some leader of a rival gang or something?” Renjun shrugs, “he barged into my apartment because he found out I had talked to you and was wondering if I snitched on him. Honestly, I had forgotten he was even at the club that night in the first place, but I do remember seeing him sneak around, avoiding the cameras and then follow Jisung into the bathroom on one occasion.”
“Lim?” Renjun perks up at the new voice. Looking up, he realises a few more men had gathered around, listening intently to what he had been saying but it was Chenle’s voice that grabbed his attention. “Oh God,” the young male whimpers, voice shaking, “is it my fault? It is my fault, isn’t it?”
Donghyuck’s eyes fill with concern and he immediately twists in his seat, a hand waving at one of the other members and in a swift motion a man wraps an arm around Chenle and leads him out, whispering what sounds like words of comfort.
Donghyuck turns back to Renjun, eyes scanning his figure from head to toe. “Did Lim hurt you?”
Renjun rips his eyes away from Chenle’s receding figure, the question surprising him as his eyes visibly flash with confusion. “No,” he says, almost instinctively, the word escaping his lips before he can even think about his answer.
Jeno cocks his head slightly, a heavy, lingering gaze settling on Renjun’s figure. “I think you’re lying.”
Renjun swallows harshly, not wanting to dwell on the memory. While NCT were obviously much more powerful and had a much scarier legacy than Lim and his small, rebel gang, NCT had also been very much, all talk but no action towards Renjun. Unfortunately, Lim was not that liberal with his threats.
If Renjun thought about it hard enough, he could still feel the ghost of the sharp blade pressing into his neck, hard enough to draw blood. It had been terrifying, much more terrifying than having a raging Jaemin point a gun at his face. For some reason, he had an inkling, a gut-feeling that Jaemin would have never pulled that trigger.
He did not feel the same way with Kevin Lim’s knife cutting into his skin. It was by a miracle Kevin felt a little merciful that day or else Renjun would have laid on his apartment floor, in a pool of his own blood with a slashed neck.
He doesn’t even realise that his hands discreetly reach up to his neck, the small wound covered by the turtleneck he was wearing as his mind recalls that nightmare of a day. “Nothing happened, I’m fine.” Renjun repeats firmly.
Jaemin looks at him with suspicious eyes, upper lip curling slightly. He stands up, his actions slow and deliberate, making long strides to place himself in front of Renjun. Renjun’s head drops, feeling more threatened by Jaemin towering over him than he’d like to admit. But then Jaemin drops to the ground, levelling himself with Renjun.
“What are you–?”
Renjun starts but he’s quickly cut off when Jaemin brings a hand to his chin with a touch so gentle he barely feels it, and tilts his head up slightly. Fingers grasp the material of the turtleneck and with a small tug, his red, healing wound is put on full display for Jaemin. With a scowl, Renjun immediately pulls away, pushing the male back and gripping his shirt tightly against his skin.
He opens his mouth to angrily retort back at Jaemin but the words lodge themselves in his throats as his eyes catch Jaemin’s. Unlike before, where Renjun had stubbornly held Jaemin’s gaze to assert some sort of dominance in the situation he was stuck in, this time he wanted to rip his eyes away, feeling his entire body burn and fizzle under Jaemin’s eyes.
Renjun thinks he sees a flash of hot fury on his face but it’s gone before he can put much thought into it, especially when Jaemin speaks to him. “Sweetheart, he did this you?” It’s a question but it’s said aloud as a statement, without any space for anything else to be added.
Looking away, Renjun reorients himself, ignoring the oddity of the anger that laced Jaemin’s every word. The man in front of him, hated his guts, that much was an obvious observation so there was so way his strange reaction was out of concern.
Renjun looks up again, eyes narrowing and voice on edge. “What? Upset you couldn't have a go first?”
The words cause Jaemin’s eyes to fly shut, his curled-up fists trembling by his side as if he was trying to contain his rage. It’s obvious the man was holding on to his temper by a thin thread and with that, when his eyes open, he immediately stands up, storming out the living room. The air is thick with silence and discomfort and Donghyuck and Jeno don’t stay too long, following in Jaemin’s suit.
And then Renjun is left alone, with a couple of NCT members he had never met, hanging around the entrance of the living room. Looking closely, he recognises Shotaro and… Taeyong, if his memory served him correct, but out of anyone in the house, the only person he was remotely comfortable with was Chenle who was nowhere to be found.
An uneasiness salvages in his stomach, his presence amongst these men making him feel alert and unsettled. He actively avoids eyes contact, his body, on instinct, curling in on itself to try and make himself look smaller.
Almost as if sensing the turbulent emotions that were replacing the blood flowing through Renjun’s veins, a voice speaks up. “We’re very sorry for getting you involved, I hope you weren’t too startled by Lim,” a man says, his voice gentle and silvery, “would you like me to check the wound? I’m a doctor.”
Renjun looks up, coming face to face with a pleasant, young man, his heart-shaped lips curled with a sympathetic smile. He stiffens, trying to remind himself who these men truly were, trying to not fall under the false sense of security of comforting words and pretty faces.
“No, I handled it,” he replies sharply, focusing back on his own fingers. But then he pauses, wondering if he’d get killed for the words, he wanted to say next. “And,” he adds finally, a twinge of cynical amusement coating his voice, “I don’t think you are very sorry. This is just the life you live, right? Nothing new or out of the ordinary for you, so nothing to be truly sorry about.
Renjun looks up, eyeing Taeyong specifically. “I’m the one that’s going to have to return to my apartment alone tonight, hoping some random guy doesn’t try to kill me in my sleep.”
And then, Renjun shuts up, breaks the eye contact and goes back to staying silent and looking back down at the ground.
Hopefully his words had the desired effect.
“I swear to God, what the hell is wrong with all of you?”
Renjun blindly grabs onto the ceramic vase and throws it on the ground in front of him, making the security guards back away slowly. He grabs another item from the dining table, a glass half filled with water and waves it in front of him.
“I’d rather fucking die than stay here.”
With that, he smashes the glass onto the ground, the sound of it shattering into millions of tiny pieces echoing around him. Renjun wipes the excess droplets of water that had splattered on him away on his thigh, realising with a heavy heart that a bit of glass on the floor wasn’t slowing down the guards approaching him slowly. He walks backwards, breathing heavily but before he realises it, he’s backed into the dining table and is now, pretty much cornered.
“I only came here to relay some information out of my respect for Jisung,” he tries to reason, “I will not allow myself to be trapped in the hell-hole under the false pretence of my safety.”
There’s no response from any of the guards who look like they couldn’t give a flying fuck about Renjun’s feelings, only wanting to do the job they had been told to do.
“Stop, don’t come any closer!” Renjun snaps, holding his palm out, flinching in realisation of how close the guards were to him. “Let me leave!”
There’s still no response from any of the guards and Renjun can’t even tell if they’re listening to him, just simply walking nearer and nearer to him. He squeezes his eyes shut and waits for rough hands to manhandle him when there’s a loud shout.
“Stop!” Renjun looks up through the men surrounding him and feels a wave of relief come over him when he sees Chenle. The young male looks like he had been crying, eyes puffy and cheeks rosy but he places his attention on Renjun and walks over to him quickly, shoving aside the guards standing in his way. “He said stop, do you not know what the word means?”
“But Mr Na,” a guard says, looking slightly frazzled when Chenle slings an arm around Renjun’s shoulder.
Chenle glares at him, “I’ll handle him, you lot can go.”
The group look amongst themselves before slowly dispersing.
Renjun looks at Chenle, eyes begging in desperation. “Chenle, please, you have to tell them to let me go, I can’t stay here.”
“Renjun,” he replies with a sigh, voice weak. His eyes fill with tears which he furiously wipes away with the back of his hand before clearing his throat with a forced cough. “Please, just, hear me out. You have to stay here, it’s the safest option for you.”
“Chenle…” he whispers, defeat evident in his voice.
“I already lost Jisung, I won’t be able to live with myself if someone as innocent as you gets hurt too because of this whole ordeal. This is where you’ll be the safest.”
Renjun’s heavy breathing slows and his shoulders slump. He leans a head against Chenle’s shoulder, eyes closing tiredly. “I don’t like it here,” he says, voice teetering the edge of tears.
“I know,” Chenle says, “And I’m sorry to force this onto you but I need you to stay alive.”
“Fine.” Renjun finally replies as he stands up straight. “Fine,” he repeats to himself.
“Thank you,” Chenle says sincerely, an appreciative smile playing at his lips. “Now, how about we go to your apartment and grab some of your stuff so you feel more at home here.”
The choice of words make Renjun want to laugh in Chenle’s face, feel at home here? Like that would ever happen. But he puts aside his snide remarks and simply smiles and nods in response.
Before long, they’re in front of Renjun’s apartment complex, Renjun wringing his fingers with his hands tightly in fear. The stunt he had pulled finally settled on him and a sickening feeling erupts from it, wondering if he had broken anything that was actually worth something. At the same time, he knew it would be plain suspicious if he jubilantly agreed to staying at the NCT residence, something much riskier than breaking a priceless vase.
Lost in his thoughts, Renjun doesn’t even process Chenle leaning forward to Renjun’s side of the seat, reaching towards the glove compartment. He casually takes a gun out, checking if it’s loaded before looking up Renjun with a shrug.
“Just in case you have some surprise visitors or anything.” Chenle says as they both exit the car as he tucks the gun by his back.
Renjun nods, his eyes fixating on the gun as it hits him like a tonne of bricks. Chenle wasn’t a new friend he was familiarising himself with, Chenle was an integral part of NCT, he was, without a doubt, just as bad as the rest of them. He was letting his guard down around Chenle too much and that was not okay.
Especially not when Chenle was Jisung’s boyfriend.
So, Renjun quietly follows Chenle up the elevator and into Renjun’s apartment, trying his best to act normal, but he can’t help but keep a safe distance between them.
Chenle doesn’t realise, instead chuckling quietly when Renjun enters the pin-code to enter his home. “Well damn, I forgot how much working in clubs really makes,” he says as he scans the interior of the duplex apartment.
Renjun smiles in agreement when suddenly something catches his eyes. His smile falters and he tenses up, but immediately trains his features to go back to laughing along with Chenle even though his chest constricts with fear. He casually walks over to the shelf by his flat-screen TV, discreetly trying to cover a shelf with his body.
“Oh yeah, definitely,” he says, a hand reaching behind him. He blindly pats around the shelf until he feels the wooden edge of the picture frame, pulling it down to make it face downwards and out of sight. “I mean it’s not my dream job but it pays the bills and lets me live comfortably. I’m hoping to go to university after I’ve saved some more.”
Chenle smiles nodding, seemingly not noticing any of Renjun’s actions to his luck. “Definitely, that was pretty much me before too.”
Renjun then makes his way into his room, pulling out a suitcase from underneath the bed, throwing in a couple of stuff he might need. He wasn’t planning on staying at that place for too long, he kept telling himself as he continues his conversation with Chenle, he wouldn’t need to much stuff. Before long, Renjun is done and before he knows it, he’s being led up to the guest room he had been in previously.
Looking around the room, he eyes instinctively turn to the cursed lamp. His face twists into an accusing scowl as he points at it. “I want that gone,” he says, his voice taut at the memories of what had happened last time Jaemin had been able to spy on him.
“Of course,” Chenle replies, immediately unplugging it and giving it to a guard who was standing by the door.
Renjun watches before looking at Chenle pointedly. “Any other surprise cameras I should know about?”
Chenle smiles softly, “No,” he says, “I promise, this room is all yours and it’s all private. The only entrance is the front door which you can lock and the only people who have the keys are Jaemin hyung, Jeno hyung, Donghyuck hyung and Taeyong hyung.”
This irks Renjun a little bit, but knowing there won’t be any more prying eyes on him while he’s asleep makes up for it. He’d rather someone barge in than someone watch him without his knowledge. Renjun, finally feeling as comfortable as he’ll ever get, heaves his suitcase onto the bed, starting to unpack.
“So,” Chenle starts, throwing himself onto the bed, watching Renjun with careful eyes, “how do you feel.”
Renjun pauses his actions, looking at Chenle, unamused. “Trapped.”
“Yeah, that’s expected, I guess.” Chenle’s voice is laced with pity and Renjun sighs, shrugging helplessly. “Can I do something to take your mind of everything?”
Renjun pauses at that question, his actions stopping midway. He wonders if he’s going to be too obvious but takes the chance. “Can I ask you what happened when I mention Kevin Lim’s name before? You got pretty worked up there.”
“Oh, that.” Chenle shrugs, laying his head down on a pillow. “I used to work at a club, you know that, but it also doubled as a brothel kind of.” There’s a grimace on his face as he talks about it and Renjun doesn’t even know how to feel at the reveal. “Kevin was a regular customer of mine but after I met Jisung and was given the opportunity to leave that line of work, Kevin apparently felt betrayed.” Chenle rolls his eyes, “he though I owed him something more than the sex he was paying me for.”
“Jesus,” Renjun breaths out, genuinely feeling sympathetic, “that must have been so hard. Customers like that are so scary to deal with.”
Chenle nods, “he held a grudge against me and NCT from that moment onwards which is why I’m scared he’s the one who did this…” his voice gets lower, “I’m scared he’s the one who killed Jisung.”
Renjun gulps harshly, “do you really think it’s him? He has the power and skill to do that?”
Chenle shrugs miserably. “If it is, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself,” Chenle whispers shakily, hands gripping the fabric of the pillow tightly. “If it is Kevin, Jisung is dead because of me, you being in this position would be because of me, everything would be because of me.”
Something stirs in Renjun’s stomach, something eerily similar to guilt but he pushes it aside immediately. Instead, he tries to show empathy to Chenle, putting down the pile of clothes he had folded and coming over to sit next to Chenle on the bed.
“I might not like Jaemin, Jeno or Donghyuck but they seem to be very capable men, I’m sure Kevin Lim will be taken care of,” Renjun says, voice taut.
Chenle nods, “I hope so.”
Renjun smiles softly, wriggling a little closer to Chenle. “Chenle, can I ask…” his voice falters slightly, “can you tell me a bit about the people that live here. I’m just a little… worried?” The words lilt into a question, certain Chenle was going to sniff him out at this point.
But Chenle simply nods in understanding. “Of course, I promise we’re not all that scary,” he chuckles lightly.
The younger male shifts slightly to get more comfortable, sitting cross-legged on Renjun’s bed. He holds out three fingers, pointing at each one as he explains. “So, we obviously have Jeno hyung, Jaemin hyung and Donghyuck hyung at the top. They’re the big bosses, they watch over all the members and all the proceedings that happen within the gang. They each have a speciality they focus in, Jeno hyung deals with weapons, Donghyuck with drugs and Jaemin hyung with gold.”
This piques Renjun’s interest. “Gold?” He had expected weapons and drugs to be a part of the list but gold was one he had never heard of.
“Yeah,” Chenle whispers, leaning in as if sharing a huge secret, “I probably shouldn’t be telling you this but our most profitable business is actually gold. There’s a secret mine in the countryside that’s under Jaemin’s total control and we ship it off to places like the UAE and India where there’s a high gold demand.”
Renjun nods, letting out a hum, voice morphing into one of impressed.
Chenle then continues. “You’ve met Taeyong hyung, haven’t you?” Renjun nods. “Yeah, so he’s the consigliere, he’s like an advisor to the hyungs, super smart, really good with numbers and always one step ahead. The hyungs trust him with their life.” Then Chenle pauses, a tight smile pulling at his lips. “And then, um, there’s – there was Jisung. He used to be the underboss, second-in-command pretty much.”
“Wait, really? He’s quite young though, right?” Renjun asks, surprised.
“Yeah, but he’s also the only direct relative of any of the hyungs, he wasn’t too keen on being part of the gang but Jaemin hyung had insisted.”
There’s a silence that settles amongst them both, Chenle’s eyes filling with grief. It’s a familiar emotion, one that had been swirling in Renjun’s own eyes just months ago. He offers a comforting hand on Chenle’s shoulder.
This seems to shake Chenle out of his thoughts, a taut smile on his lips. “Anyway, right below him are the capos, Jaehyun hyung, Yuta hyung, Johnny hyung and Taeil hyung. They’re, like, leaders of smaller groups of people – soldiers of the gang – who focus on more specific tasks given by the hyungs.”
“Soldiers?”
Chenle nods. “Yeah, that’s the term for them. They’re part of the gang but they’re not a main member.” Renjun nods in understanding, the gears in his head turning. “Then we have Xiaojun and Hendery ge, they’re the gang’s professional hitmen. Scary precision, let me tell ya.”
Renjun’s stomach drops at the words but he laughs along casually with Chenle. “Well, I definitely know who to not get mad, trying not get to randomly get sniped.”
“They’re pretty chill guys, super laidback and hilarious,” Chenle exclaims. “Next, there’s our legal team, headed by Doyoung hyung including Sungchan and Sicheng ge. And then, taking care of the medical stuff is Kun ge with help from Jungwoo hyung and Shotaro hyung.”
“Oh, I know Shotaro,” Renjun says, recognising the name before looking down, a little frazzled. “I think I was a little mean to him when we met.”
Chenle shrugs, “Don’t stress, Taro’s super sweet and doesn’t hold grudges. Plus, I don’t think anyone can be mad at you for what happened then.”
Renjun sighs, lips pursed. “I hope so, he seems like a nice guy.” Renjun then turns towards Chenle, brows raised in question, “so what about you? What do you do here?”
“I’m in the tech team with Ten ge.”
“Woah,” Renjun says, voice slightly teasing, “so you can hack into government databases and stuff?”
Chenle laughs heartily, “well, not yet, I’m still learning but Ten ge definitely could. He’s a genius when it comes to computers.” Renjun nods his head, smile on his lips but heart hammering harshly in his chest. “But that’s pretty much it, that’s all the main members. We have a whole bunch of associates who aren’t exactly part of the gang but they give us a helping hand from time to time.”
“That’s pretty complicated,” Renjun says with sigh. The words were somewhat familiar but the details Chenle had given him had made his head hurt.
Chenle’s about to reply when suddenly, the room’s door is thrown open. Renjun startles, jumping off the bed in a swift motion. He sees Jeno standing by the door, face twisted in an odd mixture of anger and frustration. He glances at Renjun for a quick second before turning to Chenle.
“He’s gone.”
Renjun can guess what this is about, and he thinks Chenle can too with how his muscles tense. “What?” Chenle asks, but there’s a heaviness in the air that already spills the truth behind Jeno’s words.
Jeno shakes his head, leaning against the doorframe as he crosses his arms over his chest. “There must have been a leak because him and his entire group are gone.” There’s a pause before Jeno regards Chenle again. “Why don’t you go down and see if Ten hyung and you can find something out.”
“Yeah, sure,” Chenle says quietly, “But they’ve got Hyunjae on their side, he can destroy all their cyber trails and he can do it well.”
“I know,” Jeno says, nodding understandingly, “but it’s worth a try.” With that Chenle gets up, flashing a tight smile towards Renjun before walking away. Jeno stands by the door, letting Chenle leave before letting his eyes drift to Renjun. “You’ll be staying here ‘til we find them.”
Renjun had already guessed that would be the outcome of Kevin’s disappearance but it doesn’t make he words any less menacing. He sighs in annoyance, rolling his eyes. “Great.” Jeno stays as still as a statue, stuck by the door and after a while of heavy stares, Renjun once again sighs in annoyance. “Do you need something?”
It’s complete silence from Jeno who continues staring at Renjun, as if trying to peer into his soul. Finally, she shakes his head, turns around on his heel and hastily walks off.
The bathroom mirror is slick with steam, tiny droplets of water sliding down the glass. Renjun stares at his reflection, eyeing himself. The next few weeks in this place would determine his survival and his ability to carry out his plan successfully. He needs to look the part, he concludes.
He reaches for his makeup bag, colouring his lips and cheeks a gentle pink and lining his eyes with black kohl. His wet hair dries into small curls and he fluffs his hair, inspecting his reflection a final time before pocketing his phone and walking out.
He had been invited to have breakfast with all the main members by Chenle and this was a perfect opportunity for Renjun to meet the entire gang.
Using his memory from last time, he makes his way down to the dining area, finding it completely crowded by the NCT members.
“Renjun!” Chenle exclaims, noticing him first. He pats the seat next to him, enthusiastically. “Here, come sit.”
With a polite smile plastered on his face, Renjun sits down, a soft whisper of greeting escaping his lips to Chenle.
“Finally decided to show up, I see.”
Looking up, Renjun realises it was Jaemin who had spoken. He scans Jaemin, eyes scrutinising from top to bottom and then shrugs. “Sorry, I like to take my time to get ready,” he pauses, eyeing Jaemin’s messy tie, “maybe you should invest some time into it too, it would do you good.”
With narrow eyes, Jaemin scowls at Renjun but this doesn’t affect Renjun who smiles at Chenle in thanks as his plate fills with all sorts of breakfast dishes. Jaemin feels the fury building in him, but before things could escalate like they did last time, there’s a snicker from someone at the table.
“Nah, now you know very well he’s not wrong.” A man calls out, nudging the guy next to him with his elbow as they both laugh behind their hands.
Jaemin slumps in his seat, sighing heavily. “Yes, yes, laugh at me all you want, hyung.”
The man ignores Jaemin’s words with a sly smile before turning to Renjun. “You must be the infamous Renjun, we’ve heard quiet a lot about you,” he says, bright smile, pearly whites and all, aimed right at Renjun. “I’m Jaehyun.”
Renjun giggles, brows raising ever so slightly because damn this Jaehyun man was objectively, insanely attractive. “All good things I hope,” Renjun says before blinking slowly. The thrusts a thumb at Jeno, Jaemin and Donghyuck, “well, unless you heard if from them. If that’s the case, none of it’s true and they’re all liars.”
More chuckles and sniggers rise from around the table and Donghyuck scoffs at that, leaning into the back of his seat, childishly. “Right then, go ahead, side with that brat.” His voice comes out more juvenile than he intended and his cheeks burn from that, glaring at Renjun angrily.
“There’s only one brat around here and it’s definitely not me,” Renjun says, pointedly looking at Donghyuck, his head cocked to the head slightly.
“Ok,” Taeyong sighs, shutting everyone up effectively with just the single word, “let’s not escalate thing too much,” he says with a specific glare in Jaemin’s direction. “Instead, let’s peacefully, introduce ourselves to our new guest.”
With that, Renjun is suddenly bombarded with a flurry of new names and introductions, nodding as he connects the faces to the names Chenle had told him the day before. Trying his best to commit as many as possible to memory, he smiles politely.
With that the conversation steers away from Renjun and as he focuses on his meal, a soft chatter fills the space. His cheeks start to feel sore as he fights the frown that want to appear on his face, feeling very much uncomfortable and out of place. He feels a little sick sitting so intimately with the members of NCT knowing each one of them had blood on their hands. When he’s included in a conversation with other members, he hopes none of them can hear the disgust that battles to sound in his voice, trying to appear as polite and cooperative as possible.
“Oh and, sweetheart, I heard you had some fun with some of our stuff when you were asked to stay here for a few days,” Jaemin suddenly speaks up, as he finishes up his food and places his chopsticks down.
Renjun heaves out a heavy sigh. “First of all, I wasn’t asked,” he says, using finger quotations for an added emphasis, “and considering there were a bunch of men trying to grab me and throw me into some random room, I’d say it was more self-defence.”
Jaemin stands up, looking down at Renjun, lips curled in mockery. His hooded eyes stare deep into Renjun’s soul and Renjun holds the gaze, stubbornly.
“We’ll talk about self-defence in a lot more detail,” he says slowly, “very soon.”
“A what?”
Renjun’s eyes are wide in horror and disbelief, the words Jaemin just said drawing out a disgusted reaction.
“A gun, Renjun,” Jaemin sighs tiredly, “I’m sure you know what a gun is.”
Scoffing, Renjun crosses his arms over his chest in indignance. “I know what a fucking gun is, what I don’t know is why I need to learn how to use one.” His breathing stutters as he scowls at Jaemin, eyes filled with pure, unfiltered rage. “I don’t know if you’re getting confused or something, but I’m not joining your little gang here, I’m here to protect myself for the time being and then I’m leaving and never looking back.”
“You think that’s how it works, darling?” Jaemin asks, voice on edge and a disturbing laugh escaping his lips. “You think you come in when you want and leave when you want?” He’s walking towards Renjun, each step of his threatening but Renjun refuses to move, standing still in his spot.
A hand rests on Jaemin’s shoulder, stopping him from walking or talking any further. Jeno glances quickly at Jaemin before standing in front of him.
“Look Renjun, the cold hard facts are that information about you has already leaked out to the point it is out of our control now. Our enemies know we are protecting you from Kevin’s gang which gives the impression we are involved with you and that you are important to us in some way. That immediately makes you a target.” Jeno lets out a soft breath, “if you do want to leave and survive outside this house, then learning how to use a gun, even at a basic level is essential.”
Donghyuck shrugs, “In other words, you’ll be dead within seconds if you walk out of here without the proper fighting skills.”
Renjun lifts his hand, feeling a migraine come on, as he massages his temple. There were much more layers and stressful factors to this whole thing than he had anticipated. “Fucking hell, should have just minded my own damn business,” he whispers to himself. He feels the urge to cry, to stomp his feet like a petulant toddler because he didn’t ask for ask for any of this.
He wished he could just go back, go back to before any of this ever happened, before where even when he was at the lowest point in his life, he was still happy. His life had been far from perfect before these three men entered it, but after?
It had gone to absolute shit.
There’s a shift in atmosphere at Renjun’s reaction and once again, Jeno, Jaemin and Donghyuck are forced to confront the fact that they had to stop being so hard on Renjun, especially not when this entire thing was their fault in the first place.
They pass a look amongst each other before Jeno steps forward, his voice not exactly soft but definitely not as harsh as Jaemin’s. “Come on, I’ll teach you.”
Renjun opens his eyes and seeing Jeno, his shoulders slump a little. “You?” he asks before nodding, “yeah, okay, fine.” The usual defiance in his voice isn’t there and he sounds almost defeated and it tugs at something within Jeno who glares at Jaemin and Donghyuck to shoo them away.
And with that, Jeno is left alone with Renjun.
A silence settles upon them, neither one initiating a conversation, neither one initiating eye contact. Jeno fights the childish urge to fidget, feeling such a thick blanket of awkwardness cover them that it could have been cut by a blunt butter knife.
Jeno, needing to do something that wasn’t just stand there like an idiot, spins around. “Follow me,” a gruff order escapes his lips, and he even startles himself with the harshness in his voice.
Why did Renjun bring out the monsters in them that was reserved specially for those that messed with them? Even when his brain told him Renjun was innocent, too innocent to be dragged into all this mess, his heart beating rapidly against his chest was telling him to stay on edge around Renjun.
Through the corner of his eyes, he sees Renjun wordlessly follow, the two of them walking downstairs where the indoor practice gun range is. The room smells of gunpowder, metal and sweat, a row of practice targets lined up and all types of guns hung up on the wall. The disgust is laid out clear in Renjun’s eyes as he eyes the wall of weapons.
A strange emotion overcomes Jeno, gripping him in a suffocating grasp.
There’s a voice screaming in his head, telling him Renjun shouldn’t be here, not in a room where so many people, that had the same ruthless heart as him, practiced their shooting skills before leaving and shooting that same bullet into the hearts of other people.
This was a room that represented nothing but bloody murder and Renjun was too good for a place like this.
But there’s nothing Jeno can do, he knows their enemies are everywhere, even inside the house and he knows he needs to equip Renjun with the necessary skills.
Jeno heaves out a sigh, grabbing a handgun, throwing it in Renjun’s direction. He watches as Renjun startles, lurching forward to catch it, surprised – and a little impressed – at Renjun’s quick reflexes. There’s evident surprise in Renjun’s face at the heaviness of the small weapon, before he looks up at Jeno, wearily.
“Don’t worry, it’s not loaded and it’s got the safety on, we’ll just practice your stance first,” Jeno says as he shrugs off his blazer, throwing it on a random chair. He unbuttons his cuffs, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt and he can’t help but smirk inwardly at the feeling of Renjun’s heavy gaze on him. As always, no matter who hated him, it was tough to disagree that he was very easy on the eyes.
“Are you sure this is all necessary,” Renjun mumbles out quietly and Jeno’s eyes snap up in confusion at how gentle his voice is. Jeno comes face to face once again at the sudden vulnerability that Renjun normally hides successfully, and it almost hurts to slowly nod in answer.
Jeno pulls out his own pistol that’s tucked into his back, launching straight into what he’s supposed to do, not wanting his mind to linger any longer on the raw emotions Renjun keeps randomly showing. Facing the practice target, he positions himself, “Feet shoulder width apart, left foot in front and slightly bent and,” he explains, his words crisp and clear. Renjun wanders a bit closer as Jeno clarifies the hold on the gun and then slowly count down before pulling the trigger.
With a loud bang, a bullet flies out, piercing the cardboard right in the middle. Renjun gasps, jumping back in surprise at the loud noise, his face twisting into fear as his eyes move back from the gun to where the bullet had hit.
“Your turn.”
Jeno watches as Renjun’s face physically drops and as much as he tries to hide the absolute horror he’s feeling behind a confident façade, but there are cracks forming in the mask and Jeno can see right through it.
But, nonetheless, Renjun follows Jeno’s instructions, trying to do his best under Jeno’s scrutinising gaze.
“Your stance is fine but let your grip be a little tighter so you’re not thrown back by the recoil,” Jeno says. Renjun shifts his position and then looks at Jeno for his approval but Jeno shakes his head. “No,” he says, voice still as calm as ever, “like this.”
Jeno demonstrates one again and Renjun tries to conform to the same figure as Jeno but it just doesn’t seem to be right.
“It’s not working,” Renjun sighs, frustration pooling inside him at a sickening rate.
Pausing for a second, Jeno feels his brain short-circuiting from the battle he fights internally, his thoughts tangled up in a frenzy. Finally, he lets out an awkward cough and walks closer to Renjun. “Can I help you?”
Renjun is stunned into silence for a second, blinking blankly before he slowly nods.
Jeno stands behind Renjun, the distance between them pretty much non-existent as he takes Renjun’s hand in his. His hands are so much bigger, he realises with a foggy brain, but he ignores himself, working to move Renjun’s – tiny – fingers around the gun. He then goes to perfect Renjun’s stance, his fingers trailing down slowly, pressing into Renjun’s thigh to gently widen the width between his legs and once again, pressing a soft palm into Renjun’s knee to bend it a tiny bit more.
The silence is penetrated by Renjun heavy breathing, his rate quickening by the second. Jeno can’t seem to figure out if he’s terrified of being touched by Jeno… or if it’s something else completely.
Jeno doesn’t know if he wants to know.
Positioning his head into the crook between Renjun’s neck and shoulder, he bends to match Renjun’s height. “Now,” Jeno whispers, his mouth right by Renjun’s ear, “eyes straight ahead.” He hands covers Renjun again, slowly guiding it to aim correctly. Jeno can feel the pulse in Renjun’s neck, jumping against the latter’s sweaty skin and he can see the shiver of Renjun’s hands that’s quelled only by Jeno’s placed on top. “And, pull.”
Renjun closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and then does what Jeno tells him to do. The unloaded gun clicks, and Jeno nods, their two bodies still awfully close.
“Now, again.”
Renjun practices the action again and again and again and then some more, Jeno’s heavy body pressed up against him, keeping his stance and his hold on the gun perfect each time. Slowly, Jeno peels himself away and the heaviness of the gun comes back, tenfold.
“Try it yourself.”
Looking a little unsure with himself, he gazes up at Jeno in hesitance but Jeno’s eyes are unusually warm and he nods, encouragingly. With a short puff of breath, Renjun trains his eyes forward, keeping everything the same, as if Jeno was still guiding him, and he pulls the trigger.
“Perfect.” Jeno’s all too aware of the one-sided conversation he seems to be having with Renjun, the other male curiously silent. It’s odd, having Renjun in front of him and not fight his every word. But it’s also odd at how his own body reacted at being so close to Renjun. Nothing felt normal at that moment and Jeno could do nothing but let it slide. Clearing his throat, he pops out the magazine of his gun, “now, let’s try with a bullet.”
Jeno loads the bullets into the magazine with ease, pushing it back up into the pistol and then lets Renjun have a turn. He’s kind of cute, Jeno thinks to himself as he watches Renjun struggle with holding the gun while loading.
“It gets easier with experience,” Jeno tells him, before pausing, a sly smile playing at his lips, “although with those small hands of yours, I do doubt that.”
And there it was, the Renjun he knew accompanied with an angry scowl and an annoyed roll of the eyes. Jeno can’t decide what he likes more, the quiet, gentle Renjun or the sassy, snide one.
Jeno almost shakes his head in disbelief, he shouldn’t be liking either, actually.
“Now, aim again, just like you did last time,” he quickly says, trying to figure out where that strange thought had come from.
Renjun’s silence shatters when he aims, but there’s a stutter in his movements, unsureness washing over his face. “Um,” he starts, looking around sheepishly, “would – could you help?”
There’s a murmur in Jeno’s heart at the words and how gently Renjun says them and he realises belatedly that his head is moving in an unending nod as if he was some kind of human bobblehead. He snaps out of it, quickly clearing his throat awkwardly before walking over to Renjun.
He comes closer and closer and closer and with every step his heart beats faster and faster and faster.
Jeno holds Renjun once again and he realises how close this position resembles to a back hug. With that thought unmoving in his mind, his hand carefully pushes away Renjun’s curly hair that was obstructing his view before coming to gently wrap over Renjun’s hands.
The gun is cold, Jeno is even colder and yet Renjun… Renjun is a like a human heater, emanating a heat that covers Jeno in stabbing tingles all over his body. Has he been drugged? He wonders hazily, feeling all his guards drop when he comes in such close proximity with Renjun. He breathes in lightly and stops midway through, Renjun’s vanilla bodywash exploding in his nose, almost suffocating him.
He’s definitely been drugged.
Renjun looks up at Jeno, his unguarded eyes meeting Jeno’s for a tiny second. Like this, Jeno is so awfully aware of how close they are, how every part of Renjun’s body is pressed into his front, how he’s so small in his embrace. Jeno wants to look down, but he doesn’t, fights the urge to do so and instead he’s staring straight ahead.
“Look at the target, Renjun,” he says, voice low and throaty, his face hopefully stoic and void of the turbulent emotions he’s facing. Renjun listens immediately, snapping his head forward and then, “pull.”
Renjun has never, ever shot a loaded gun before, not even seen one unless it’s from a shitty action movie that pops up on the cable from time to time. He knows there’s a recoil when you shoot but no one had ever told him just how strong it would actually.
He never thought it’d be strong enough to push him backwards, even further into Jeno’s body, his forehead hitting Jeno’s firm chest harshly.
“What the…” Renjun’s voice trails off as he pulls away from Jeno, eyes searching for where the bullet had gone because it definitely hadn’t hit the target.
Jeno looks up in amusement and point up and Renjun realises in sheepish horror that he had managed to get the bullet wedged into the metallic door at the entrance. “I mean, that’s…” he says, trying not to laugh, “that’s something at least.”
Renjun huffs, lips turning into a pout and suddenly all amusement is gone from Jeno as his eyes focus on Renjun lips… were his lips always this pink?
“I just need practice,” Renjun says, voice sounding petulant even to his own ears.
It snaps Jeno out of his strange daze and he chuckles awkwardly.
He needed to leave.
But randomly walking out would be strange and so he clears his throat, for what feels like for the nth time in the past hour. “Practice? Thought you hated guns?”
There’s a proud smirk playing at Renjun’s lips and he looks up at Jeno. “I do,” he says, eyes narrowing, “but I hate the idea of not being the best at everything I do even more.” There’s a competitive spark in Renjun’s eyes that surprises Jeno a little. “I’m always the best at everything I do.”
There’s no room in his voice for argument and Jeno finds himself nodding, impressed. “A perfectionist.”
“Very much so.”
“Well, let’s try again then,” Jeno says. This time, he swears to stay away, there was no longer a need to be getting so close to Renjun. “Now you know the strength of the recoil, try and prepare for it. Keep your feet well-grounded and keep the gun pointed at the target the entire time.” Renjun nods and then he looks up at Jeno, almost waiting. “Try it yourself this time.” Jeno says, hoping his voice isn’t completely raw with his emotions.
Jeno wonders if it’s eyes playing tricks on him be he swears he sees a slump of disappointment from Renjun but it’s gone as soon as Renjun holds the gun up again. He pulls the trigger, the first few times it goes flying everywhere but the target but Renjun isn’t one to give up. He empties the magazine, reloads the gun just like Jeno had taught him and goes at it again.
“I think you’ve got it,” Jeno muses, eyeing the bullet that had finally managed to hit the board, even if it was very off target.
Renjun looks up sharply, slightly out of breath. Shooting a gun was much harder work than they made it out to be in the films, that was for certain. “I just need more practice.”
There’s a sternness to his voice that stuns Jeno who simply nods and then walks away, leaving Renjun to practice by himself, needing to get as far away from Renjun as possible.
Renjun was dangerous.
Not in the way people around him usually were, not in the way where people were out for his blood.
No, Renjun was dangerous in a whole different manner.
He tries to name the emotion that’s stirring up inside him, the emotion that makes him ache with every step he takes further away from Renjun.
Lust?
It’s the safest answer, he tells himself. It’s probably just that.
But… why? There was no need to feel things like that, not when he had…
He shakes his head, sticking with his previous conclusion.
It was lust. Renjun was attractive, he had seen the way he had danced at the club that night and had felt the heat that it had stirred up inside him but not only that, Renjun was a challenge. He was rude to them, didn’t give a fuck about their authority and that excited Jeno, which is why he was feeling all those strange things.
Yes, that’s it. That’s the logical answer.
No need to ponder over it too much.
Renjun wasn’t blind.
Nor was he stupid.
He had seen it all, the sharp tensing, the fiery gazes, the touches that lingered too long.
Renjun couldn’t help but smirk, his fingers playing with the gun. It was surprising that Jeno was so weak, so easy but then again, he did seem to be more of the emotional one out of the three. But even then, he didn’t expect for a few shy glances, soft words and gentle touches to break down all the walls.
He had been expecting a little bit more resistance.
It would have made it a bit more fun if he had resisted a bit more honestly.
But they were easy. Too comfortable with the power they have, they thought themselves as indestructible, the arrogance, the pride, the sickening hubris so obvious in their eyes.
Renjun smiles to himself.
There’s a reason you never become too comfortable in positions of high power.
You become blind to the motives of the people who seem the most innocent, blind to the motives of the people closest to you.
Renjun’s sinister smile turns into a sneer as he lifts his arms, hands wrapped around the gun, finger ready at the trigger. He looks at his straight ahead and hate fills his narrowed eyes.
Instead of the target he pictures Jeno… Donghyuck… Jaemin.
And then he pulls the trigger.
Renjun’s breathing is heavy and harsh, the fury inside him making his heartrate increase more than his current activity but still, his lips curve into a grin. After hours and hours of endless practice, the bullet had pierced right through the centre of the target.
Sighing happily, Renjun feels content with his progress. He puts down the gun, grimacing as he examines his hands, purple and blue and all bruised up. He’s pretty sure you’re supposed to wear gloves during shooting practice but then again, he’s being trained to face the real world, where with the time you pull on a pair of gloves, you’d be dead. Still, it’s a good thing he won’t be going into work anytime soon. He’d get a grand total of two dollars if he went in with hands like this.
With a final sigh, Renjun walks out, walking up the stairs when he freezes in mid-step, coming face to face with Jaemin, Donghyuck and Jeno. They’re immersed in a heated conversation that immediately pauses as soon as they see Renjun.
Jaemin and Donghyuck eye him wearily but Jeno’s jaw goes slack in utter confusion. His head tilts in confusion, disbelief filling his eyes.
“You were still practicing?” he asks, voice cracking, “Renjun, it’s been,” he glances down at his watch, brows raising alarmingly as he calculates the time, “it’s been almost six hours.”
Renjun tries not to smirk at the shell-shocked expressions that all three men in front of him wear and instead he shrugs with an overly sweet smile.
“I told you,” he says, breezily, looking up at Jeno. “I don’t stop until I get what I want, no matter what I always come out as the best at whatever I do.”