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Newton was his usual obnoxious, lively self when Hermann arrived at the lab that afternoon. Even more obnoxious than usual, actually, because he was blaring his atrocious music so loudly that Hermann could feel his eardrums vibrating.
He did his best to ignore it and just focus on his work, which proved to be impossible. After half an hour or more of non-stop noise, Hermann put down his chalk with more force than was strictly necessary and stormed over to Newton’s battered old CD player. He turned it off – also with more force than was probably necessary.
“Dude, what’s your problem?”
Hermann scowled. “My problem is that it is impossible to think with that awful noise blaring.”
“It’s not my fault you have crappy taste in music,” Newton said, voice a little sharper than Hermann would have normally expected from him, even during their usual spats.
Which, in retrospect, should have been his first clue.
“At this point, it’s not even the music that’s the problem. Anything would be intolerable at such a volume.”
Newton stalked over to the CD player and flipped it back on, glaring at Hermann all the while. The moment he turned his back, Hermann turned it back off again.
The other man spun around, breathing heavily and looking angrier than Hermann could recall ever seeing him before. “Dude, fuck off!”
Hermann gaped at him. “E-excuse me?!”
“You’re always finding something to be pissed off about, dude. ‘Newton, your music’s too loud.’ ‘Newton, stop getting kaiju entrails on my side of the lab.’ ‘Newton, you’re breathing the same air as me, it’s very irritating, please stop.’ If you don’t like it, why don’t you just leave? Find someone else to annoy if you hate me so much, because I’m getting really, really sick of hearing you bitch about everything!”
Hermann was stunned, and before he could form a response, Newton had already walked back over to his desk. He slammed his hands down on the surface so hard it made the nearby empty coffee mugs rattle in alarm.
“When was the last time you slept?” Hermann asked quietly.
“A few days ago, I guess. Why?”
A thought occurred to Hermann, and if it had been anyone other than Dr. Newton Geiszler, he would have dismissed it as ridiculous and incredibly unlikely, but… “Newton, exactly how much coffee have you drank today?”
The other man leaned back against his desk, gripping the edge of it so hard his knuckles turned white. “What? I– I don’t know. A few cups, I guess, I haven’t really– Why? What the hell? Why does that even matter? What I drink or don’t drink is my own damn business, dude. So, why are you–“
Hermann stepped towards him. “How many cups is ‘a few?’’”
“Dude, I haven’t been keeping track. I’ve been busy, okay? I’ve been up for days working on – on stuff, and I don’t keep, like, meticulous records of my coffee-drinking, okay?”
“How many have you drank in the past hour?”
“I don’t–“
“Give me an estimate. How many do you think you’ve drank?”
“Jesus fucking Christ, Hermann. Why are you interrogating me? I– I don’t know. Maybe like… five, maybe?”
Hermann stared at him in horror. “In the past hour?”
His voice got even more shrill than Hermann would have thought was humanly possible. “God, yes! Will you just leave me alone? You’re giving me a headache! I’m trying to work! And I’m– I’m having hard enough time trying to concentrate without you nagging at me!”
“I think you should sit down for a moment.”
“Yeah? Yeah? Well, here’s a newsflash for you, Hermann: I don’t care. I don’t care what you think. I don’t want to sit down. I don’t– I– Damn it, I–”
“Newton?”
“I– I can’t breathe,” he wheezed. He didn’t look angry anymore, just pale and frightened.
Hermann hurried over to his side and lightly grabbed his arm. “Here. Here, sit down.”
Newton let Hermann guide him over to the couch, and it didn’t take much goading to get him to sit, since by then his legs seemed almost ready to fall out from under him. Once he sat down, he put his head between his legs. “I feel– I feel like I’m gonna throw up. I’m pretty sure I’m gonna, probably.”
Hermann sat close to him and gently rubbed his back. He could feel how badly he was shaking, and he was concerned that Newton might pass out if he kept breathing the way he was.
“Newton,” he said, in what he hoped was a soothing manner. “Please, try to calm down.”
His colleague shuddered and let out a strangled sob that he tried and failed to muffle by burying his face in his hands. “Yeah, sure. Sure, great. I’ll just– I’ll just get right on top of that.”
Hermann kept rubbing his back. He wasn’t sure what else he could do. Newton was clearly unwell, and he probably needed to go the infirmary, but the man was so notoriously stubborn that Hermann wasn’t sure how to convince him to go. For that matter, he wasn’t sure Newton was even capable of taking himself anywhere at this point. He supposed he could have a medical team come and get him, but he didn’t want to cause Newton more stress – he was already barely holding himself together as it was.
“Breathe.”
“I can’t.”
“You obviously can or you wouldn’t be talking. You just need to slow down.”
“Yeah– Yeah okay. How?”
Hermann had no idea. He was not equipped to deal with this sort of situation. “Think of… something calming.”
“Nothing calms me.”
“Don’t be so dramatic. There must be something. What do you–“
He forgot whatever else he had meant to say, because Newton abruptly crumpled against him. He was definitely not equipped for this. He flailed around for a moment uncertain of where to put his arms before awkwardly wrapping them around Newton’s shoulders.
“Sorry,” Newt said, and quite frankly, that terrified Hermann more than anything else leading up to that point, because he couldn’t remember a single time Newton had ever apologized to him for anything.
“There’s no need to apologize,” he said softly, trying to remain calm. It wouldn’t do for him to panic and upset Newton further.
“Can I just…“ Newton trailed off, and Hermann was about to ask what when he felt the other man’s arms tentatively wrap around his waist. He wasn’t sure exactly how he felt about that – it was odd, but not unpleasant.
“Yes, that’s… It’s alright.”
Newton wasn’t shaking as hard as he had been earlier, which Hermann hoped was a sign that his condition was improving and not getting worse. His breathing was still erratic and with the way he was pressed up against him, Hermann could feel his heart pounding rapidly against his chest.
Without really consciously meaning to, he found himself gently stroking the back of Newton’s neck. “Shh, it’s alright,” he whispered gently. “You’re going to be alright.” He wasn’t really sure of that – he was still wanted to take him to the infirmary, but he needed to at least try to calm him down, first.
It was probably a testament to how upset he was that Newton didn’t comment on the fact that Hermann was basically petting him – in any other situation, he was certain the other man would’ve had one or two snide remarks on hand. Of course, in any other situation Hermann wouldn’t have been doing it at all.
Newt’s breath was warm against Hermann’s neck. “No one’s ever, like, died from drinking too much coffee. Right? That’s not something that actually happens.” He sounded scared, but he also sounded more coherent than he had been previously, so it was an improvement.
“You’re not dying, Newton.”
“How do you know? You’re not a doctor – well, I mean, not that kind of doctor.”
“Newton?”
“Yeah?”
“Please shut up.”
He laughed, and it sounded alarmingly more like a sob than an actual laugh, but he seemed to be breathing a little easier.
“I would like to take you to the infirmary,” Hermann said very cautiously. He was wary of upsetting Newton now that he was finally beginning to calm down, but he really needed to get him taken care of.
“Okay.”
He was opening his mouth to argue and had to catch himself when he realized Newton was agreeing with him. That was new. “Do you think you can stand?”
Newton pulled away and for a strange, brief moment he felt almost… disappointed – he wasn’t entirely sure why.
He gave Hermann a bright smile that was only slightly diminished by the fact that he still looked a bit like he wanted to vomit. “Yeah. Yeah, I think so. Would it be– I mean, do you think you could maybe help me up?”
“Of course.” Hermann stood and held out a hand. During the couple of seconds it took to help hoist Newton upward, his hip and knee voiced their discontent rather loudly. It hurt, badly, but he could ignore it – he’d experienced worse. Once Newton was on his feet and Hermann shifted his weight, the pain subsided.
He had tried not to let the pain show on his face, but it must have, because Newton said, “Oh shit. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?” Newton – who mere moments ago had been hyperventilating and half-convinced he was dying – was now giving him a deeply concerned look. His eyes were very… green. Hermann didn’t think he’d ever noticed what color they were before. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure why he was noticing now.
He cleared his throat and looked away. “Yes, I’m sure. Let’s go.”
~
“You don’t have to do this, you know,” Newton said, leaning against him heavily.
“Newton, just be quiet and keep walking, for the love of God.”
“This has to be killing your leg, dude. I can get to the infirmary on my own, you know.”
Hermann huffed, “Firstly, I’m fairly certain if I left you to your own devices, you would probably go to your room, not the infirmary, at which point you could very well die, for all I know. Secondly, I’m also fairly certain that if I let go of you, you’re going to collapse.”
“So I’ll crawl to the infirmary. Or my room. Or wherever. Why do you even care? I would’ve thought you’d be getting ready to throw a party at my funeral.”
Hermann stopped in his tracks, suddenly feeling incredibly angry. “Dr. Geiszler.”
Newton looked at him, wide-eyed, blinking rapidly. “What? What is it? Why are we stopping?”
“Contrary to what you may believe,” Hermann said very slowly, just to make sure he was being very clear. “I do not wish you ill will. I most certainly don’t wish you dead. If I did, would I be going through the trouble of ferrying you to the infirmary myself?”
“Oh. Oh, okay. Dude, I– I was just joking.”
“I’ve always been under the impression jokes are supposed to be funny.”
Newton smiled, expression surprisingly tender. “Yeah, well, I’m a little off my game today, I guess. Sorry.”
Hermann took a moment to compose himself, a little surprised at his own outburst. “We should continue on.”
Newt nodded. “Yeah, sure. Okay. I guess ten cups of coffee was a pretty bad idea, huh?”
“You said five.”
“…Did I?”
~
The closer they got to the infirmary, the more difficult things became. Hermann wasn’t sure if he was just getting tired, or if Newton was actually getting heavier.
“Newton, if you pass out, I’m not going to be able to carry you.”
The other man drew in a shaky breath. “Ugh, yeah. Yeah, I know. I’m sorry, man.”
Hermann adjusted his grip on Newton’s waist and steadied himself. “It’s alright. Just hold on a bit longer – we’re almost there.”
Eventually, they arrived at their destination.
Newton hesitated. “You know, I’m not a huge fan of hospital rooms and stuff.”
“Well,” Hermann replied, “that’s one thing we have in common, at least. Whether you like it or not, however, you need medical attention.”
“That’s like the hundredth time you’ve said that. ‘Newt’s sick, Newt go see a doctor,’ I get it. Okay, let’s just... get this over with.”
They entered the infirmary. Business – such as it was – seemed to be blessedly slow, and it wasn’t long before a couple nurses came to retrieve Newton from Hermann and wrangle him over to a bed.
“He’s going to be alright, isn’t he?” Hermann asked, feeling an icy sort of dread slither across his stomach as the nurses fussed around, hiding Newton from view.
One of them walked over and gave him a sympathetic smile. “Don’t worry, Dr. Gottlieb,” he said. “We’ll make sure he’s taken care of. We’ll let you know how he’s doing later, okay?”
Hermann nodded numbly and left, not quite knowing what to do with himself.
~
A couple hours later, Hermann still hadn’t heard any news from the infirmary. He was about two seconds away from marching back down there to find out what was going on when Newton walked in, still looking a bit pale and unsteady on his feet.
“Hey, dude.”
“They let you go?”
“Yeah, they did,” Newton replied, nodding just a little too enthusiastically.
Hermann was suspicious. “They told you to go back to work?”
“Well, uh, no.”
“No?”
“No, they told me to go to my room and rest – some crap about twenty-four hours of enforced medical leave – but it’s bullshit, I’m fine, and I’ve got work to do, so–“
“Unbelievable,” Hermann muttered.
“I know, right? They can’t seriously expect me to– Hey, what’re you doing?”
Hermann stalked across the room, scowling, and pushed Newton back towards the door. Even though he looked considerably better than he had when Hermann had left him at the infirmary, it was obvious he was still unwell – he staggered slightly, even though Hermann hadn’t pushed him particularly hard. He grabbed his arm in a vice grip, partly to direct him but, honestly, mostly to make sure he wasn’t going to fall over.
“I’m enforcing your medical leave.”
Newton looked at him incredulously. “Are you kidding me?”
“Do I look like I’m kidding?” Hermann hissed. “What is wrong with you? Do you somehow lack any self-preservation instincts whatsoever or are you just stupid?”
“Dude, back off. I have stuff to–“
“Yes, and none of it will get done if you end up aggravating your condition further – which you will if you insist on working when you should be resting. Now will you allow me to escort you to your quarters, or do I need to call and have someone from medical come down to fetch you?”
Newton glared at him indignantly. It might have been a bit more imposing if he hadn’t been visibly wavering on his feet. As it was, it was about as intimidating as being glared at by a very small, very irate kitten.
Hermann raised an eyebrow. “Well?”
“God, fine. Fine.”
Hermann kept a hand on Newton’s shoulder, just in case, but the other man – while still unsteady – didn’t need as much support as he had earlier. Consequently, the trip to Newton’s room went by a lot faster than the trip to the infirmary had.
“Well, here I am. At my room.”
Hermann stood there and watched him expectantly. “Yes.”
“So… you can go now.”
“I’m not leaving until I see you in bed.”
Newton’s eyebrows shot upward.
Wait. No. “That is, er, what I meant was– I want to be sure you’re getting your medically required bed rest, and I don’t trust you not to go bolting down the hallway the moment I turn my back on you.” Yes, that sounded better. Much better.
“Oh. Okay. Then I guess you, uh, want to come in?”
“Well, if you’re uncomfortable–“
“I’m not,” Newton said quickly. “I, uh, I’m not. It’s fine. I just wasn’t expecting– It’s cool. Come on in.”
Hermann had never been in Newton’s room before. It was pretty much what he had imagined it would be like – posters covering at least seventy-five percent of the wall-space and rows of kaiju figurines sitting atop a dresser that looked like it’d been the victim of a clothing explosion, drawers ajar and various articles of clothing hanging out of them. He managed to contain his reaction up until he saw a large plush replica of Scissure lying on Newton’s bed, at which point he rolled his eyes and a disapproving noise escaped from his mouth despite his best efforts to restrain it.
Newton shot him a look. “Dude, you’re the first person I’ve ever let in here – it’s my inner sanctum. Could you maybe try to dial down your disdain? Just a little bit?”
“You sleep with that?”
“Yes. I mean, no. I mean, yes, I do, but you make it sound like something weird, and it’s not. I just, uh, I don’t sleep well if I don’t have something to... hold.” Was he blushing?
The mental image of Newt cuddling what was basically a stuffed animal – albeit a monstrous one – in his sleep was… cute. And “cute” was not a word he attributed to very many things – least of all Newton Geiszler. Hermann shook his head. Clearly the exhausting events of the day were starting to take a toll on him.
“Oh, whatever,” Newton said, wandering over to the mess that was his dresser. “You might act all cool, but you can’t tell me you’ve never needed to cuddle something.”
It was Hermann’s turn to blush. “I don’t see how that’s any of your–“ He saw a brief flash of Newton’s tattooed chest before his brain caught up with the rest of him and he turned around hurriedly, staring pointedly at the door. “I am an adult – I’m fully capable of sleeping without clinging to inanimate objects for comfort.”
Behind him, Newt snorted loudly. “Well, good for you, dude. Me, I’m a crappy sleeper. So, if clinging to an ‘inanimate object’ helps, I’m going to cling to the thing. Sue me.”
“Perhaps you’d sleep better if you lessened your caffeine intake to slightly less toxic levels.”
“Wow, you fucking cracked it, Hermann. What a simple solution! Why did I never think of that? What have I been doing with the past thirty years of my life when the answer all along was ‘stop drinking coffee?’”
“Yes, yes. You’ve made your point, Newton. Don’t excite yourself.”
“Dude, the guys down in the infirmary pretty much sucked all the excitement out of me for the day, trust me. And they told me I just needed to rest and I’d be fine. I’m not going to keel over or anything. Uh, you can turn back around now.”
Hermann turned back around. Newton had changed into a pair of boxers with hearts on them and a t-shirt with Mothra on it. He hadn’t known Newton’s tattoos extended beyond his upper body, but he saw swirls of color peeking around the edges of the boxers, and the sweeping lines of another tattoo curling across the curve of one of his calves.
Newton cleared his throat. “Uh.”
Hermann looked up so fast he wrenched his neck. “Can I trust you to take care of yourself from here on?”
“I don’t know,” Newton replied with a tired grin. “What will you do if I say no?”
“I’ll assume you’re just being difficult.”
His grin faltered slightly. “I’ll be alright. You don’t need to stick around.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m sure. Thanks, man. Really, for everything – I appreciate it.”
“It was no trouble.”
“Dude, it was nothing but trouble.”
“Well, yes, but under the circumstances… I was happy to help.”
“…Really?”
“Don’t let it go to your head, Newton,” Hermann warned, knowing full well that Newton generally let everything go to his head. “Sleep well.”
“Yeah, I will. Sleep well, I mean – or try to, anyway. Thanks.”
~
The next day, Newton came into the lab in the afternoon looking much better than he had the day before. “Morning.”
“It’s three pm.”
“Oh crap, is it? Well… they did tell me to take twenty-four hours off.”
“It’s only been twenty-two.”
Newton stopped and gave Hermann a strange look. “You’ve been keeping track?”
“Er,” Hermann stammered, “that is– Technically you shouldn’t be back in here yet, but… you look like you’re feeling much better, so suppose I’ll allow it.”
“Yeah, I am. Feeling better, I mean. I mean, I’m not feeling great, but my legs aren’t noodles and my heart’s not acting like it’s performing a drum solo at a rock concert, so that’s good, right?”
Hermann was relieved. Relieved enough that he didn’t even bother trying to conceal it. “If you feel as though you need to take a break, later on, you could take a nap on the couch.”
“I appreciate the thought, dude, but that couch isn’t exactly… cozy. I don’t know. I don’t think I’d be able to fall asleep there, to be honest.”
He had suspected as much. “I, ah, brought something that might help with that.”
“I don’t think taking sedatives hot on the heels of a caffeine OD is a good idea, Hermann.”
“What? No. No, it’s nothing like that.”
“Oh, right,” he laughed. “Okay. What is it, then?”
He grabbed the item in question off of his desk and walked over to Newton with it. He felt the heat rising in his face, and he felt ridiculous, but it was too late to back out of it now.
“Dude, what is that?”
Hermann thrust the stuffed animal at Newton. “It’s something of mine from my childhood, that I keep with me. You, ah, you mentioned yesterday that you sleep better when you have… something, and I realize there’s nothing particularly ‘cuddly’ in here, so, I– I brought you this. Take it.”
Newton blinked at him and gently took the plush lamb from him as though he were afraid he might damage it. “Dude, that’s really kinda… sweet of you. Geez, Hermann.”
“You may keep him on the couch, for as long as you like, but if you ever – ever – get any kaiju entrails or bodily fluids or God only knows what else on him, I will never forgive you. Is that clear?”
He grinned. “I swear. I swear I won’t. I’ll guard him with my life, dude. Does he have a name?”
“…Oskar.”
He more than half-expected Newton to tease him about it, but he didn’t. “Oskar. Okay. I’ll take good care of him, I promise.”
“Good. Well, ah, we should get back to work.”
“Yeah. Yeah, sure.”
~
Newton stayed in the lab while Hermann went down to the mess hall to retrieve dinner for them both. After the sort of day Newton had the day before, it felt like the right thing to do. He had looked very tired when Hermann had left him – the last thing he needed to do was go traipsing throughout the Shatterdome.
When he got back, he didn’t see Newton in the immediate vicinity. “Newton, where are you? I brought you some of the lasagna, and those revolting chicken nuggets you love so much. Get over here and eat them, before they–“ He swallowed the rest of his sentence.
Newton was sprawled out on the couch, one arm tucked under his head and the other curled around Oskar – hugging the stuffed animal against his chest. His glasses were resting precariously on top of his head and he was snoring softly.
Hermann’s stomach twisted almost painfully. Hungry – clearly, he was hungry. He was going to eat. He wasn’t going to wait for Newton to wake up. He could just microwave his food and deal with the woes of chewy, re-heated chicken later when he got up later. It was his own fault for falling asleep when he knew full well that dinner was on its way.
Hermann sat as his desk and ate in silence, and if he kept stealing more glances at Newt than were strictly necessary, he told himself it was only to make sure he wasn’t drooling on Oskar.