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Gladiolus, more so than the others, likes to keep clean when they’re on the road. Which is why he’s always pushing them to stay at havens closest to bodies of water. He sets up camp, eats, then sneaks away for a brief time to bathe. When pressed about it, he says regular bathing helps him maintain a sense of normalcy.
“You don’t have to lie, Gladio,” Noctis laughs. “We’re all guys here. We know what you’re really doing when you go off on your own.”
That night, Gladiolus kicks his ass harder than he has in a long time. When Noctis complains about it later, Ignis says he deserved it and Prompto laughs until he’s wheezing.
Some friends he has.
Noctis vows to get Gladiolus back. He’s not a child anymore to be pushed around by his older, taller, stronger bodyguard. He’s royalty, damn it!
He waits until the next time they camp out to exact his revenge. After supper, Gladiolus slinks down to the small pond near the haven and after a short time, Noctis follows him, telling Ignis and Prompto that he, too, wants to bathe. Prompto barely hears him, too wrapped up in whatever he’s looking at on his phone. Ignis looks at him suspiciously but then again, that could just be Ignis. Noctis beams him a smile and runs away before Ignis decides to say anything to derail him.
Noctis moves quietly through the brush surrounding the base of the haven, trying his hardest not to make a sound. He can see Gladiolus standing in the shallows, his back to Noctis and his eyes closed as he scrubs at his skin with one hand. Though Noctis can’t see the other hand, judging by the way the muscles of Gladiolus’ back are bunching rhythmically, Noctis is pretty sure he was right about how Gladiolus likes to spend his alone time.
Noctis stifles a laugh against the back of his hand. He takes a few moments to appreciate the view in front of him and seriously debates whether to join Gladiolus. He nips that idea in the bud quickly, reminding himself why he’s there in the first place. He spots Gladiolus’ clothes resting neatly folded (and wouldn’t Ignis just be so proud?) on a stump not far from where he’s hidden. Noctis aims a low-level fira at the pile and gleefully watches it go up in smoke.
He takes one last, appreciative glimpse of Gladiolus in the throes of passion then books it out of there before Gladiolus catches a whiff of the charred remains of his leather jacket.
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“NOCTIS!” Gladiolus bellows as he stomps up the side of the slope.
“Good heavens, man,” Ignis says. “Put some clothes on.”
Gladiolus ignores him in favor of stalking right up to Noctis, in all his naked glory. He grabs Noctis by the shoulders and hauls him up and shakes him. “Where are my clothes, you little prick?”
Noctis laughs. “Gone,” he crows happily. He grunts when Gladiolus drops him unceremoniously, rolls away from Gladiolus’ kick to his ribs, and runs to hide behind Prompto. “Hey, Prompt, make sure to get pictures.”
“Way ahead of you, man!”
Gladiolus growls and moves to grab at Noctis again but is stayed by a hand on his shoulder. Ignis holds up a pair of boxer briefs and Gladiolus takes them with a grumble and steps into them. They’re ridiculously small on him, doing nothing more than to cover up the bare minimum.
Noctis bursts into renewed laughter and hangs onto Prompto to remain upright, tears streaming down his cheeks. Prompto snaps shot after shot, even as Gladiolus chases them around the haven. Eventually, Gladiolus catches up to them and tackles them to the ground, but Prompto manages to slip away, losing one boot in the process.
“Too slow, big guy!” Prompto taunts, sticking his tongue out at Gladiolus.
Gladiolus glares at him, the look in his amber eyes promising Prompto future pain but right now, he’s a little preoccupied with holding Noctis face-down in the dirt.
“Hey, Iggy,” Gladiolus calls. “What’s the most fitting punishment for a naughty prince?”
Ignis, done with all of them, goes to bed and locks them out of the tent until they promise to “play nice.”