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"Do you know what today is?" is what she wakes up to. Jake in the kitchen, singing loudly and slightly off key, "It's our anniversary, meant for you and me." He's coming closer. Amy closes her eyes and goes back to sleep.
"Uh uh, I saw that, you're awake."
"I wanted to let you surprise me," Amy says sitting up. Jake sets a tray on the bed, with a bowl of cereal, a boiled egg, and toast. He sets a glass of orange juice on the night stand and looks at her eagerly. She takes a bite of cereal and Jake settles on the bed and opens a granola bar.
"Happy Anniversary, Babe," he says before taking a bite.
They sit in silence for a second, but Amy notices Jake fidgeting.
"This isn't the only surprise, is it?"
"Definitely not. But you should totally give me your gift first because otherwise it's gonna seem really lame compared to what I got you."
"Jake, it's not about presents, it's about celebrating our relationship and all we've been through-"
Jake cuts her off by putting an envelope in her lap. Amy opens it and stops mid-sentence.
"Jake. Is this what I think it is?"
"You mean two VIP tickets to Binder-Con, including a VIP meet and greet with keynote speaker Leslie Knope? Yeah, that's totally what it is. But you know, it's not about gifts, it's about celebrating our love."
"SHUT UP, JAKE, I'M GOING TO BINDER CON!"
A month later, Jake and Amy head to Buffalo with a promise to send hourly photo updates to Captain Holt, but no Trapper Keepers, as they were a disgusting mockery.
Amy is prepared, full of fun binder facts that she can’t help but share.
"Did you know that they used to make binders like hard cover books? Three pieces of board held together with cloth book covers and end sheets? Oh god and don't get me started on the vinyl phase. It was poisonous. Literally. But I mean, they just didn't know any better."
When they arrive, a revolving door made to look like a giant binder with dividers, Amy looks so happy she could burst.
"It's like Disneyland for nerds. Seriously, is that the mascot? Who is that?"
"Uh, only Friedrich Soennecken, the inventor of the binder! We have to get a picture with him!"
They stand in line for an hour for a picture with the mascot and Amy makes friends by making binder jokes, while Jake stands around sticking out in his jeans and hoodie.
"This must be what it felt like when I took you to see Jay Z, isn't it?"
"Yeah, a little bit. It would have helped if I knew where we were going and wasn't wearing a pantsuit."
They stop at a stand and purchase snacks shaped like office supplies. Jake is quite fond of the three onion rings, while Amy likes the gummy staplers.
Despite what Captain Holt has to say, Jake's favorite part of the day is the neon lit Trapper Keeper display, including vintage Trapper Keepers on sale. Jake sends Holt a picture of the exhibit and a video of him purchasing a Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper with the picture of unicorn jumping over a rainbow.
He holds it up to his face and looks into the camera, "Captain Holt, I know you told Amy to bring back some binders and I found the perfect one," he says into the camera. "Unicorn jumping a neon rainbow," Jake sings in a high pitched 80's metal voice, complete with guitar sounds.
Amy rolls her eyes and starts to say something, but stops in her tracks, eyes open wide. She frantically pats Jake's arm.
"Jake, Jake, that's her. That's Leslie Knope! I've been following her all over social media. Her binder enthusiast Facebook group, her Instagram
of the binders she uses in her office. Her binder Pinterest is where I got the idea for Captain Holt's birthday present. She is a binder legend. Oh my god! I'm gonna meet her. What am I gonna say? I used all my good binder material waiting in line!"
Amy starts panicking. Jake takes her hand and turns her to face him.
"Ames, you are going to kill it. She's gonna love you. You'll be best binder friends and do what binder friends do."
"Jake, Leslie Knope makes friendship binders for all of her closest friends. I will never be on that level with her. I should tell her about how I completely revamped the 99's organizational system! I should have put the pictures in the binder I brought her to sign!"
Their VIP tickets get them seats up close and they can see all of the binders on stage. Amy gasps.
"Those are the real Knope Binders," Amy says with awe as they take their seats. The lights dim and air horns blast before Leslie appears onstage with a lot of fog. Too much fog.
"Okay, Tom, cool it on the fog," Leslie says before turning to the crowd.
"Welcome to Binder Con 2017! Who's ready to talk organizational skills? Who wants to talk binder mishaps? How about some binder hacks?"
The crowd laughs, "Yeah, I thought so. We don't need binder hacks because we know how to pick the best binders for the job. Not like those plebeians who put too much paper in a two-inch ring. Our rings always close. Our paper never snags. Our dividers always cascade. Alright, enough small talk, let's talk binder styling."
Jake looks around at the crowd which is completely enraptured.
They head out as soon as Leslie's done and wait in line at the meet and greet. Their VIP badges allow them to go to the front of the line. Amy takes deep relaxing breathes.
"You got this. You got this," she says to herself.
"If you freak out, I'll jump in, ease the tension. Tell some jokes, share some stories."
In no time, Amy is waved forward. She pulls a binder out of her bag and hands it to Leslie.
"Well, well, this is lovely. May I?" Leslie asks. Amy nods. Alot. The front page of the binder is a table of contents.
"Very nice. I love the font. Tell me your binder story," Leslie says.
"Um, wow. Leslie Knope likes my font. This is my binder for us. This is my boyfriend Jake and he bought us these tickets for our anniversary. And I was really inspired by the binder you made for you and Mr. Wyatt's paper anniversary. It was beautiful. And while I didn't want to copy your style, you can see from the dividers and paper protectors that I am definitely influenced. I took some stylistic liberties, our theme is New York because we're both detectives for the NYPD 99th Precinct in Brooklyn."
"Tell her what you did, Amy," Jake says beaming with pride.
"What did you do?"
"Oh, it's nothing."
"She totally reorganized the precinct and made brand new binders for all of our case files. It's really easy to use, even Hitchcock and Scully can use it. And they're useless."
"What an amazing accomplishment. This is great work. What's your name?"
"Detective," Amy answers nervously. Jake squeezes her hand reassuringly.
"I mean, Detective Amy Santiago. Pleasure to meet you, Ms. Knope."
"Amy, do you go by OfficerOrganized online?"
Amy nods.
"You're rant on people over the age of 11 using wide rule paper was inspired. I won't have it in my office. Though all of my attempts to ban wide rule paper from Pawnee were blocked by Jeremy Jam, I did manage to buy all of it and recycle it to get it out of stores. If you're as passionate about your detective work as you are about binders, the Brooklyn owes you a debt of gratitude." Leslie shakes Amy's hand and Amy stands stunned. She thanks Leslie as Jake leads her away.
On the drive home Amy chatters excitedly as Jake drives and her excitement is contagious.
"Seriously, Jake, this was the best gift ever. Thank you so much."
"It was cooler than I thought. And I got a super cool Trapper Keeper that Captain Holt hates. Best day ever."
