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Amy Santiago, World's most Amazing Detective slash Genius, a title so elite that only a handful of people know about it (and which she happens to share with two other people) is on a mission.
Her goal is to complete cooking classes and successfully bake good. cupcakes, and she's determined to succeed.
Amy was a sucker for rules. She lived for clear, precise instructions and step-by-step procedures she could follow. But cooking and baking had never been her strong suit. Which is weird considering how good she is at following instructions, which is what recipes are.
She pushes the door open into the commercial kitchen, looking around the big space with awe.
It’s a small class, about four other people coming in just after Amy. She finds a seat at the table, takes out her notebook and pen, and dives in.
The next morning, she brings a container of cupcakes, chocolate with salted caramel icing – to the precinct.
Amy leaves them in the middle of the break room table; hoping people will take them and give feedback throughout the day.
It takes Jake four hours to notice the cupcakes after he stumbles in; nursing his coffee and ten minutes late (Holt gives him a glare as he sails past, giving a shrug to the Captain).
She’s making herself a coffee when he comes in and pauses, staring down the cupcakes.
He has one in his hand and is taking a bite in seconds, and Amy hears Jake pause in his chewing as she sits down at the table.
“Oh my god, who made these?” he asks, and Amy looks up to find his face scrunched up.
“Me. Why? Are they okay?” she frowns, concern etching into her features as Jake starts to nod furiously.
“They’re delicious! This is my awed face.” he takes another huge bite of the cupcake and chews it slowly.
“I’m so glad. I took a class and everything.” Amy beams, getting up and heading back to her desk as Jake smiles back. He continues chewing for a long time, eventually swallowing the lump of cupcake.
“How are they so damn dry?!” he whispers to himself, gulping down his coffee.
--
Holt wanders into the break room to get a coffee refill when Rosa’s sitting in there, glaring at her phone.
“Is everything alright, Diaz?” he asks, carefully.
“Someone’s trying to outbid me on this sword on eBay.” She responds, and Holt just nods.
“Are you responsible for these?” he asks, pointing at the cupcakes and Rosa tears her withering gaze away from her phone to frown.
“Why the hell would I do anything nice for the whole precinct? Anyway, Jake seemed to enjoy them.” She shrugs.
“Peralta’s tastes are not a good benchmark for quality; however, they certainly look appealing. I might partake in one.” Holt selects a cupcake carefully, and Rosa shrugs before taking one for herself.
Holt takes a bite and then immediately spits it back into the cupcake wrapper, producing a napkin to wipe his mouth with.
“Good god, they’re terrible.”
“They can’t be that bad.” Rosa counters, taking a bite. Holt observes her; one eyebrow raised as she chews for a minute and then throws the cupcake into the bin, reaching into her pocket for a lighter.
“These are the worst cupcakes I’ve ever eaten in my life.” Rosa spits, and Holt holds up a hand as she sparks the lighter over the bin.
“Detective, perhaps it isn’t wise to light fire to state property?” he points out, and Rosa huffs.
“Fine. I’ll set fire to these on the roof and throw them off.” She glares back at him, and grabs two cupcakes, marching out of the room and towards the roof access door.
As she passes Jake’s desk, he looks up. Amy’s on a case with Charles and Terry, thankfully, so she misses the sight of Rosa storming towards the roof with two cupcakes clutched in her hands.
“Hey Rosa, what’re you doing?”
“Giving these awful cupcakes the fate they deserve.” She tosses her response over her shoulder, and Gina simply lowers her phone to watch over the top of it as Rosa storms outside.
“Who pissed her off?” Gina mutters, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips as she watches Rosa balance the cupcakes on the edge of the roof, light them on fire, and then kick them off.
“Not me, and that’s all that counts.”
“Whoever made those cupcakes needs to be banned from baking ever again.”
“They’re not that bad.” Jake protests, as Gina scoffs.
“I mistakenly ate one with my morning coffee, because a goddess such as myself must only feast on the prettiest of foods and these look delectable, but they’re way too dry and horribly tasteless.” Gina replies as Rosa storms back inside, pocketing her lighter.
“They’re horrible.” Rosa adds, turning to glare at the spot where the on-fire cupcakes met their terrible fate.
“Better?” Gina asks, and Rosa nods.
“I’m going to throw a printer at who ever made those.” Rosa mutters, and Jake pales.
“Don’t do that!”
“Whoever it is deserves to suffer for making me eat those.”
“It was Amy.” Jake sighs, and Gina’s eyes swim with amusement.
“I should have guessed.”
“Really?” Rosa frowns, her fists unclenching.
“She’s such a terrible cook, but she told me she took a class and she was obviously super proud of them.” Jake continues, and Rosa smirks.
“How many did you eat?” she asks, leaning on the edge of his desk as her eyes light up.
“Three. I ate one in the break room and then two in front of her at my desk. The only other people enjoying them were Hitchcock and Scully, and we all know they’ll eat everything!”
“You’ll eat anything, Pineapples.” Gina rolls her eyes, and Jake scoffs.
“I will not. I don’t eat salad. Or vegetables. Or anything remotely healthy in general.”
“You’re eating them because you’ve got a big crush on her and you feel bad and want to make her feel better about them.” Rosa grins, and Gina howls with laughter.
“You’re right, Rosa.”
“You are not! I am not!” Jake protests and Rosa just rolls her eyes.
“You are, because you’ve got it bad for Amy Santiago and you think if you enjoy her cupcakes then you’ll get her to like you.” Rosa retorts, and Jake pulls a face.
“Do not.”
“I’ll prove it.” Rosa grins as Gina begins to cackle, and Holt sticks his head out of his office.
“What’s going on?”
“Jake has a huge crush on Amy.” Gina supplies, and Jake buries his head in his hands.
“Everyone knows that. Everyone except Santiago, that is.” Holt replies, and Rosa snorts.
“That’s not helping!” Jake whines.
“I bet that if we tell Amy her cupcakes were good, she’ll bring more and Jake will eat them no matter how terrible they are.” Rosa smiles, and Holt purses his lips in consideration as he thinks.
“The chances are high, yes.”
“I will not!” Jake lowers his hands from his face to glare at them, and Gina just scoffs again.
“Prove it. I’ll tell her when she gets back. And none of us can say anything bad about the cupcakes, or she won’t bring any more.” Rosa grins.
“You suck.”
“I bet you $50 bucks.” Rosa smirks.
“I’ll match the $50.” Gina adds.
“Fine.” Jake mutters, dejected.
“Easiest free money of my life.” Gina grins, leaning back in her chair and propping her legs on the desk.
“You guys are the worst.” Jake mutters, turning back to his computer screen and finishing the report of the case he and Rosa worked on as Holt goes back into his office and Gina raises her phone back up over her eyes.
--
“Your cupcakes were okay. You know. For cupcakes.” Rosa says as she walks past Jake and Amy’s desk, and Jake watches a slight blush creep onto Amy’s cheeks.
“Thanks, Rosa.”
“Whatever. Maybe you should bring less next time though, six would cover it.” Rosa suggests, and Amy nods.
“Cool. Cool, cool cool.” Jake hears her mumbling as Rosa strides off, and his heart sinks.
Luckily for him, she doesn’t bring in cupcakes the next day. Or the days after that. In fact, it takes a week until she does, and the cupcakes she brings in are exquisite, the decorations and piping on the top looking so professional.
“I took the second class last night, it was a piping workshop.” Amy tells Jake as she gestures to the plate sitting on the break room table, a smile settling on her lips.
He hopes to whatever deity is out there that these cupcakes taste as good as they look, because he can see Rosa and Gina eying him through the blinds from their desks.
“You can eat them, you know.” Amy jokes, jolting him out of his staring match with them as she gives him a gentle nudge. It manages to make his heart race and his breath quicken.
“Yeah, sure! Thanks, Ames.” Jake smiles, hoping it doesn’t look forced – oh god, it looks forced, doesn’t it?
“You’re welcome. Enjoy.” Amy finishes making her coffee and walks back to her desk, and Jake plops down at the break room table. He picks up a cupcake, looking at the delicate rose piped over the top, the icing a pretty shade of pearlescent white.
Honestly, he almost feels bad about eating the cupcake because it looks so nice and he can tell Amy has put in a bunch of effort, but Rosa is glaring intensely at him through the window, so he carefully pulls back the wrapper and takes a bite.
To his delight, it’s perfect – the cake is the best balance of chocolatey, crumbly, moist cake that he’s had in a long time. A smile breaks out across his face as he quickly devours it, reaching for another. He’s just finishing the second when Hitchcock and Scully come in, eyes alighting on the cupcakes.
“Are those yours, or for everyone?” Scully asks, Hitchcock beginning to sweat as he licks his lips.
“For sharing.” Jake replies, getting up to grab another mug of coffee. The sound of delight the two elderly Detective’s make is hair-raising, and they converge on the plate in seconds, the remaining four cupcakes disappearing.
Jake just scurries out of the break room and back to his desk, plopping into his chair.
“How were they? Was the icing okay?”
“Yeah, they were really good and the icing was nice. Not too sweet, either.” Jake replies, Gina’s smile growing behind her phone as Rosa and her share a look.
“Oh I’m so glad! I didn’t make the cupcakes this time; they were pre-made by the lady who was hosting the workshop so we could focus on icing them.” Amy beams, and Jake hears Gina swear under her breath as Rosa inexplicably smashes her fist onto her stapler.
Amy jumps, her glance darting over to Rosa.
“Stapler jammed.” Rosa growls out between clenched teeth, and Amy nods slowly.
“Do you want me to fix it for you?” she offers, and Jake tries to hold back a laugh.
“No thanks, Santiago,” Rosa replies as she throws the whole stapler in the bin, “I’ll just buy another. Or steal one. Whatever.”
--
“We’re not paying up if she didn’t make them.” Rosa and Gina corner Jake later in the afternoon, and he gasps in outrage.
“Cheaters.”
“Whatever. You’ve gotta eat four more consecutive batches of terrible cupcakes before you lose, or tell her they’re no good and we’ll pay you.” Gina says, flicking her hair behind her shoulder.
“And if they’re not terrible?”
“Unlikely.” Rosa snorts, and Jake raises an eyebrow.
“Fine. If they’re good, we’ll eat them, and tell her, and pay you.”
“Deal.” Jake shakes with the two ladies.
To her credit, Amy absolutely nails the piping and icing, because the next batch of cupcakes she brings in look like they’ve come from a bakery. Jake, Rosa and Gina gather around the plate sitting in the break room, staring at the ten perfect looking cupcakes.
“We might as well all try them. For equality purposes, of course.” Jake grins widely, taking two and handing them to Gina and Rosa before he takes one for himself.
“Cupcakes! Oh yum! Are they beetroot cupcakes?” Charles comes bounding in, and Jake gags.
“Who would put vegetables in cupcakes, Charles?! Why would you ruin them like that?”
“Jake, come on. Carrot cake is delicious!”
“I strongly disagree. It’s my least favourite type of cake, and I love cake.”
“What about fruit cake?” Rosa asks, and Gina laughs.
“Nah, he just eats all the icing and leaves the rest.”
“Jake!” Charles chastises, unwrapping his cupcake as the other three do. They all take a bite at the same time, and spit it back out simultaneously.
“Did Amy make these?” Charles asks, and Jake nods.
“She put in way too much sugar.” Charles takes a mournful look at the cupcake before throwing it in the bin, Gina and Rosa following suit.
Jake’s about to do the same as Amy comes into the room.
“I see you guys found my cupcakes, are they alright?”
“Yeah! They’re fine.” Jake grins, taking another huge bite in front of her as she smiles.
“That’s good to hear. I’m glad it’s not just Scully and Hitchcock enjoying them.” Amy starts making herself a coffee.
“Yeah, totally.” Jake replies as Rosa, Gina and Charles all disappear from the room.
“Let me know if there’s anything that needs improving.”
“Just make sure you follow the recipe and you should be fine.” Jake replies, hoping Amy picks up on his hint.
“I’ll have to make another batch soon if people are enjoying them.” She smiles, and the happiness in her voice makes him want to die.
It’s killing him, lying to Amy, but he’d rather her be happy over what she thinks is doing something well than being disappointed at failing something. After all, he knows how big of a thing failure is to her.
“Noice. Smort.” Jake nods, picking up his coffee and bolting back to his desk as he ignores the grins on Rosa and Gina.
“Three more batches, buttercup.” Gina whispers across Amy’s empty desk, winking as he frowns.
--
Amy doesn’t make any cupcakes for a couple of weeks after that, and Jake is perpetually grateful. The week she does make cupcakes, they’re undercooked in the middle, the cake batter ruining the texture completely. Gina and Rosa throw theirs out almost immediately after Amy disappears on a case with Terry, and Jake reluctantly eats his – but discovers that despite the cupcake being undercooked, the flavour is good. And it’s not like he dislikes cake batter, so it’s almost a win. Almost.
Charles gasps when Jake tells him about the bet, glancing furiously between Jake and Amy, who is talking to Holt in his office.
“Jake! You have to tell her! But it’s so romantic that you’re making her feel good.” He gushes, and Jake waves a hand.
“Could you keep it down, buddy?”
“Got it. Oh god, I’m so torn! What do you do?” Charles whispers as Jake buries his head in his hands.
“I don’t know, Charles. I don’t know. I just have to hope she’ll get better at making cupcakes before the bet conditions are up.”
“Two more batches, Jake. I’m sure she can do it.”
“I hope so.”
“I believe, Jake. You and Amy will be the best couple!” he grins, and Jake groans.
“Charles!”
“I can’t wait until you get married! I’ve got the speech and everything.”
“I’m walking away now!” Jake almost stumbles getting up from his chair, and runs off towards the evidence room.
“What was that?” Amy asks as she exits Holt’s office, and Charles just smiles.
“Just Jake fighting his destiny.”
“Okay…” Amy takes a seat, glancing towards Charles and then the evidence lock up.
--
Sure enough, after a few weeks Amy makes another batch of cupcakes and brings them in. This time, they’re vanilla and chocolate and Amy’s put way too much vanilla essence in. As a result, the cupcakes come out with a bitter aftertaste.
She hands two each to Rosa, Charles, Gina and Jake before leaving the rest in the middle of the break room, insistent that they all get some without Scully and Hitchcock devouring them. Gina gives Amy a thin smile, cooing over how pretty the icing is – it looks like a bouquet of different coloured daisies.
Jake unwraps his, hoping for the best but disappointed when he encounters the bitter vanilla aftertaste. He tries to keep his face neutral, putting it aside.
“I’ll save it for later.” He tells Amy, and she nods, used to him saving food.
His phone buzzes with a text as Gina looks over, Rosa peering on curiously.
How is it, Pineapples?
Too much vanilla. Bitter aftertaste. :(
Gina just smirks, tapping a quick reply.
Better tell her or the next batch (which will no doubt be bad too) will make us winners. Xx
The cupcakes sit on everyone’s desks for the day, Rosa and Gina’s mysteriously disappearing into their trash cans under their desks as the day draws on, and when Jake and Amy hit a lead in their latest case she grabs his unfinished cupcake as they make their way to the elevator.
“Late afternoon snack.” Amy offers it to him, and Jake nods.
“Smort. Good thinking. Nice.” He panics, the words echoing in the elevator horribly as he tries not to cringe.
“Okay.” Amy laughs nervously, starting towards her car as they reach the garage.
He manages to leave the cupcake in the cup holder, claiming that he’s already drank four coffees with sugar and doesn’t need the sugar high right now as they investigate the warehouse that was trashed.
Jake watches Amy take notes as she interviews the warehouse workers and owner, while he questions the security guard who showed up to check the area. It gives them a rough time frame, off the security guard’s schedule, and helps narrow things down as they visit local warehouses and enquire after security footage, or other details which could help.
It takes longer than planned, and Jake is almost starving by the time they get back to the car.
“Are you gonna finish that?” Amy asks, pointing to the half-eaten cupcake that Jake’s abandoned, and he nods.
“Yep! For sure. Definitely.” He scoops it into his hand and nibbles it as she starts the engine, her eyes already rolling.
“Jake, at least eat it over your palm and flick the crumbs out the window.” She sighs, pushing the button that rolls down his window.
“Good thinking Ames.” Jake turns to the side as he almost faces the window, using the opportunity to peel the wrapping off and drop the remaining out of the moving car.
“Cupcake down, cupcake down!” he yells, and Amy snorts.
“I’m not going back for it. Five second rule be damned, I will not watch you scrape food off the pavement and eat it.”
“I’ve eaten food after five seconds, when no one is looking. It’s really not that bad.”
“Jake! Ew!” Amy shrieks, and he laughs the rest of the drive back.
When they get back in, they spend a few hours completing the paperwork. When Jake gets a chance, he secretly sneaks his cupcake off his desk and into the bin underneath, feeling terribly guilty but also relieved. Gina, Rosa and Charles have left by now, Terry still scribbling away at papers on his desk and Holt in a call with someone who’s making him frown. Jake’s concentrating so hard on his own paperwork, keen to go home and watch the showing of Die Hard that starts at 7pm that he doesn’t notice Amy peering over his shoulder.
“There’s no second ‘o’ in that word.” She points, the closeness of her voice startling him. He jumps, ignoring the puzzled gaze she’s giving him as he quickly corrects it.
“Thanks.” He nervously laughs, trying to subtly shove his bin further under the shelter of his desk.
“Jake, you can stop trying to hide the fact you’ve thrown out my cupcake. I saw you.” Amy folds her arms over her chest, and he laughs.
“What? I didn’t throw it away.”
“I can see it.” Amy points down, and Jake follows her finger to spy the cupcake very much in view.
“It’s not mine!”
“Jake. Come on.” Amy glares.
“It slipped out of my hand.”
“You swear by the ten second rule.”
“I didn’t notice?” Jake replies his voice a little higher as Amy snorts.
“I know they’re awful.”
“I wouldn’t say that.” Jake tries as Amy fixes him with a disbelieving look.
“I found Gina, Charles and Rosa’s cupcake in their bins too. And you practically threw the half-cupcake out the window of my car. Wing mirrors are a thing, Jake. I could see.”
“I wasn’t hungry, and I didn’t want you to feel bad.”
“I’m a detective, not an idiot.” Amy rolls her eyes.
“Okay. They’re not great.”
“Why would you lie to me?” Amy looks hurt as she sits down in the seat next to Jake’s desk, and he frowns.
“Because I’m not a jerk?” Jake feels his voice getting higher again as his heart pounds in his chest. The answer is a little more complex than that, but it’s not like he wants to tell Amy that he didn’t mention the cupcakes because he might have (okay he definitely does have) the world’s biggest crush on her that’s only intensified since she broke up with Teddy and he and Sophia ended things.
He’d eat a million terrible cupcakes if it meant making her smile thinking someone was enjoying them, because Jake is agreeably (a self-diagnosed) huge sap, and while he lacks the people-pleaser trait of Charles, he would do everything in his power to make Amy Santiago happy.
Because seeing the corners of Amy’s eyes crinkle, watching a smile stretch across her face, and seeing the adorable way her cheeks lightly dimple and her eyes light up makes Jake feel like he’s soaring. Which, to be honest, is fucking ridiculous.
But it is what it is. And while Amy is clueless to his feelings for her, apparently everyone else is not. Including Rosa and Gina, who enjoy using that to their advantage to get money and increase his crushing debt.
“You should have told me. How bad were these?” Amy asks, breaking Jake out of his thoughts.
“These ones were too vanilla-y. It left a bitter aftertaste.”
“I think I misread the instructions because my contacts were drying out and I didn’t have my glasses in reach. Were the other batches bad, too?”
“The first ones were a little dry, and the second were undercooked and raw in the middle. Which, I mean, is a total win for me-but not so much for everyone else.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Gina and Rosa have a running bet with me.”
“And what do they get if you lose?” Amy arches a brow, and Jake takes a second to admire the curiosity sparking in her eyes. She always gets a gleam whenever she’s keen to discover more of something, it’s part of why he likes working with her. God, he’s in so deep it’s not even funny.
“Fifty bucks. Each.”
“No way. How many cupcakes do you have to eat?”
“At least one from four different batches, but they didn’t count the ones your piping instructor made.”
“Rude.” Amy laughs, and Jake grins.
“They thought it would be good free money, and a good way to embarrass me.”
“Why would it embarrass you?” Amy asks, and Jake feels heat swooping up his neck.
“Just watching me squirm. Is you know. Fun.” Jake stammers out, and Amy gives him a curious look but nods.
“Well, that leaves one more batch. I guess I could just never make cupcakes again?”
“They’d be suspicious.” Jake sighs, running a hand through his hair and missing the way that Amy stares at him.
“How do you win the bet?”
“Well, I either tell you they’re terrible or you make good cupcakes.”
“You can just tell me, its fine.”
“No way! Ames, I won’t embarrass you like that.” Jake argues, and Amy smiles.
“Well, guess I’ll have to make a good batch of cupcakes.”
“Amy, you can do anything you put your mind to, honestly.”
“I might need your help, though.”
“My help?” Jake blinks quickly, and Amy nods.
“You can make sure I follow the recipe, and taste-test at home.”
“I can?” Jake looks up at Amy, and she’s smiling.
“If you’d like.”
“If you wanted me to visit your house that badly all you had to do was ask.” Jake teases, and Amy rolls her eyes and blushes.
“You’re unbearable.” She shoves his shoulder lightly, and he laughs.
“It’s a date, Santiago! Our second, boy you must have it bad for me.”
“Oh shut up.” Amy giggles, pushing herself off the chair next to his desk and grabbing her purse.
“When works for you?” Jake asks, trying to ignore his heart rate increasing. He officially just asked Amy out, and it’s a big moment for him.
“Saturday? Do you have any plans?”
“Let me just check my schedule,” Jake grins, tapping his chin thoughtfully as Amy rolls her eyes, “I was going to sit in front of the television eating pizza while lamenting how boring my life was.”
“No other plans?” Amy asks, a smile tugging at her lips as Jake laughs.
“Nope. I sadly have a very work-centred life.”
“Me too!” Amy grins, and Jake lifts his hand for a high-five.
“Good job!”
“Alright, I’ll text you a time. See you tomorrow, Jake. Have a good night.” Amy grins, waving goodbye to Holt through his office window as she walks away, pausing to say goodbye to Terry.
Jake finishes his paperwork and makes it home in time for Die Hard, smiling at the thought of spending time with Amy on Saturday evening as he eats his pizza.
--
Friday passes without anything noticeable except a perp who throws his milkshake on Jake in an attempt to get away. As Jake mourns the waste of perfectly good milkshake, and the fact he’s going to have to wash his clothes, he hears Rosa tackle the perp and land a blow to the back of his knees with her baton.
The guy’s strangled scream is almost satisfying enough to make Jake feel better, until Rosa marches out of the alleyway with the guy handcuffed, mud smeared all over his face.
“What happened?” Jake asks, his eyes widening.
“He happened to fall into a puddle of dumpster water.” Rosa shrugs, a smirk at the corners of her mouth as she shoves their perp into the back of the squad car.
“What a shame.” Jake grins as the perp glares.
Before he knows it, they’re back at the station and questioning the guy. He cracks easily, Rosa leaning on him with enough scare to force the details out, and they complete their paperwork in time to leave at 6.
“I’m free!” Jake exclaims, standing up and raising a file above his head, letting it drop to the floor for effect. Paper rains out of it, scattering across the tiles as Holt walks out of his office.
“You’ll be required to clean that up before leaving, Peralta.”
“On it, Captain.” Jake grins, bending down to gather the papers up as Amy rolls her eyes and hands a sheet to him.
“I know you find me ridiculously adorable, Santiago. You can barely hold your adoration back.” Jake teases Amy as he reaches for a paper near her desk, and she laughs.
“Sure.”
“That wasn’t a no.”
“Jake, watching someone else flirt is really killing my Friday afternoon mood.” Gina calls, and Amy blushes pink as Jake laughs uncomfortably, quickly gathering the rest of his papers and putting the file back on his desk.
“See you tomorrow.” He whispers to Amy, and she smiles and nods.
“Have a good night.” She replies, tucking her hair behind both her ears before picking her pen back up and going back to her paperwork.
Rosa’s eyes go a little wide as she watches out of the corner of her eye from her desk, and she smirks before picking up her bike helmet.
“Later.” She calls to the group, scooping her bag up from the floor as Jake joins her on the stroll to the elevator.
“Sup Rosa?”
“I’m going home to eat dinner and then practice throwing knives at my customised Vulture dart-board.” She replies, and Jake just nods.
“Cool.”
--
Jake’s in the middle of watching CSI when his phone buzzes on the arm of his massage chair. He picks it up so quickly that he drops it, managing to half-catch it and fumbling again as the phone juggles between his limbs before landing on his thigh.
-Hey Pineapples – does 2pm work for you?
Jake smiles at the text, his fingers hurrying to type a reply.
-Yup. Your place or mine?
-God, Jake. That sounds like we’re organising a booty call. How about mine? I know where everything in my kitchen lives. Do you even have a kitchen?
-Ha ha. I do. I’ll be at yours around 2. Ish.
-You better not be late, or I’ll order a pizza and throw it out a window in front of you.
-You wouldn’t!!!! :o
-Want to test that theory? :)
Jake laughs, locking his phone and turning his attention back to the television as a warm feeling settles in his chest.
--
Amy fusses before Jake gets to hers – she’s not sure why. Her kitchen cupboards are exceptionally well organised. She knows which drawer contains the measuring cups and scales, which drawer has the muffin pan and loaf tin, which drawers hold the mixing bowls and the cupboard that contains her beater.
Really, for someone who’s not amazing at baking she really shouldn’t have such a big supply of cooking equipment.
But her mum had obviously hoped that she’d get better with age and time, so Mama Santiago had almost equipped Amy to make anything with cook and bakeware gifts.
A knock at the door jolts her out of flicking through her recipe book, and she glances up at the clock.
“Who knew that the secret to getting you to turn up early was threatening pizza?” Amy laughs, swinging open the door to find Jake standing on the other side, hands in his pockets.
“The safety of pizza is a very serious issue!” He fires back, grinning.
“You’re so lame.” Amy snickers, and Jake scrunches up his face.
“You don’t have to remind me. I’m here, aren’t I?”
“Hey.” Amy shoves him with her elbow as he passes her, and he laughs loudly.
“Okay, first of all, where’s your stereo?”
“On top of the fridge. Why?” Amy asks, watching as he fishes around in one of his pockets.
“Because we need music. It totally sets the mood.” He replies, pausing after he finishes speaking to hold an awkwardly intense stare with her as both of them flush a little.
“Ah yes, the baking mood. I know it well.” Amy croaks out, spinning around on her heel and rummaging around in her cupboards for cupcake ingredients as Jake plugs his iPod into her stereo, fiddling with the settings and starting a song.
Of course, the song that starts playing has to be “I Really Like You” by Carly Rae Jepsen.
Amy resists the urge to smack her palm into her forehead, taking a deep breath as she tries to brush off the moment.
Obviously it meant nothing.
“I might have been listening to Carly Rae Jepsen on the way over.” Jake mutters, and Amy snorts.
“Okay, so what was your suggestion on helping?”
“Official bowl cleaner?” Jake suggests, a cheeky smile greeting Amy as she turns back to face him.
“I guess that’s better than DJ.”
“I totally could have been a DJ if I wasn’t a cop.” Jake argues, and Amy snorts.
“Sure. DJ Peralta, dropping sick beats in the club.”
“The sickest beats.” Jake laughs and Amy joins in as she unstacks bowls from each other.
“At the very least, you can read the recipe out to me and make sure the measurements are correct.”
“If you insist on making me do slave labour, then sure.” Jake sighs dramatically, pushing himself off the counter he was leaning against and towards Amy.
The way he looks down at her lips briefly makes her heart race a little, so Amy grabs the jar of flour and holds it up like a trophy.
“Let’s start with this.”
--
An hour later, Amy’s managed to sift all of the dry ingredients –except the flour - together, after careful measuring observed by Jake. They’ve only had two mishaps – one of them being when Jake jokingly said three cups of sugar when he actually meant one, leading him to clasp his hands over Amy’s as she was about to drop a second cup of sugar into the mix. When he grabbed her hands she almost dropped the cup anyway, so his efforts were nearly for nothing. But luckily he managed to grab it, putting the sugar back as Amy pulled her hands away and shoved them into her apron pocket.
“You can’t joke about measurements, Jake! It needs to be precise!” Amy had grumbled while Jake had held back his chuckles.
The second (intentional) mishap had been Jake deliberately lying about the amount of chocolate needed, so that Amy poured extra which countered the handful Jake swiped out of the bowl, causing her to laugh and throw a chocolate chip at him as he’d managed to catch it in his mouth.
Everything would have been fine if not for the fact that while dancing along to Kelly Clarkson, he’d managed to knock the bowl with flour over and spill it all over their clothes and the kitchen counter.
Which, naturally, prompted Amy to scrape a handful off the counter and throw it at Jake’s head.
Jake stood stunned, flour still drifting down in front of his eyes as Amy clapped a hand over her mouth and stared at him with wide eyes.
“It’s on.” he grinned, scooping up his own handful and throwing it above Amy as she shrieked, covering her head with her hands.
The flour fight lasted for five minutes, Jake making it rain flour as Amy laughed so hard her sides hurt, curled on the floor using the front of her apron as a shield as Jake spun around in circles.
“I think I’ve won.” Jake declared, causing Amy to peek out from her cover in time for him to dump one last handful of flour over her head.
“Jake!” Amy cried, shoving at his knees as she clambered up from the floor and looked down at the mess.
“Looks like we need to clean the kitchen.” Jake just grinned, his grin faltering a little as Amy glared at him.
“Looks like I need to clean the kitchen?” he suggested, and Amy nodded.
“I’ll supervise. As practice, for being your boss one day.”
“Good idea. I work terribly under supervision.” Jake laughed as Amy rolled her eyes, digging the dustpan out of her counter under the sink and handing it to Jake.
--
Jake cleaned it up fairly quickly, letting the flour fall into the trash as Amy carefully re-measured the flour, Jake peeking over her shoulder to check she was putting in the right amount.
“Now all we have to do is mix the dry and the wet ingredients together.” He smiled, and Amy laughed.
“You say that like it’s easy.”
“It totally should be. Then I eat it all, right?”
“Once it’s been baked.” Amy giggles, shoving Jake lightly as he smirks.
Mixing the butter and sugar is surprisingly easy, and she beats in the eggs and vanilla without any issues (Jake carefully observes the amount of vanilla, helping her measure it out and double checking the recipe). They mix in half of the dry ingredients, then the milk, and the rest of the dry ingredients and the required amount of hot water.
The batter is glossy, a little runny and smells deliciously chocolatey. Jake jams a finger into the bowl, scooping up some of it and shoving it into his mouth as Amy gapes at him.
“Jake!”
“What, my hands are clean? Were clean.” Jake grins back as Amy rolls her eyes, scooping out enough batter to fill the cupcake papers before sliding the muffin tray into the oven. She sets the timer for fifteen minutes, as per the recipe and stands back, arms on her hips.
“Well, that’s all we can do for now.” She smiles, turning to face Jake. He laughs, eyes drifting over her face.
“You’ve got a little flour on your cheek, Ames.” He points to his face where the flour is on hers, and Amy raises her hand to swipe at the opposite cheek.
“Not there, opposite cheek.”
“Whoops.” Amy blushes a little, swapping sides and missing the spot.
“No, you still haven’t got it. Here, let me.” Jake chuckles softly, reaching one hand out to cup her cheek gently as he uses his free hand to brush the flour off her skin.
The air grows heavy – Amy can feel her heart start pounding, Jake’s breath fluttering over her lips as she looks up at him. His eyes are fixed on her cheek, but she can see them darting down to look at her lips every few seconds as she feels her skin heat under his touch.
It would be so easy to lean forward, arch into his touch and connect their lips.
Right at that moment, ‘You are in Love’ by Taylor Swift starts playing, and Amy feels like time has slowed, such is the intensity with which she and Jake are experiencing this moment.
His eyes drift to meet hers, and she sees his tongue dart out nervously and lick his lips as they lock eyes.
It feels like her heart is fluttering, her head spinning from the close contact the two of them are having. It’s everything she ever imagined for a romantic moment for them, and better.
Amy’s skin feels so soft underneath his hands that Jake can barely deal. The entire kitchen smells like chocolate and he’s currently cupping Amy’s face in his hands and naturally, a super romantic Taylor Swift song is playing on the stereo and it’s as if he’s stuck in a dream that he never wants to end.
His mind is screaming at him, while simultaneously catching on fire – KISS HER. He could, if he leant a little forward and tilted her head ever so gently with his hands, their lips would touch. He wonders if he’d feel fireworks, or stunning warmth and dizzying happiness.
But things between them are a complete unknown, and Jake really doesn’t want to make a fool of himself and stuff up their good work relationship and friendship.
Jake drops his hands suddenly, taking a step back as Amy inhales a sharp breath, dropping her eyes to the floor before leaning down to check on the cupcakes.
The room feels colder without the warmth of Amy’s skin pressed against his.
Amy rights herself and leans back against the counter with a sigh, studying her nails. Jake really can’t tell if she looks disappointed or relieved.
He feels like a fool – he’s wanted Amy for so long, just the simplest action of a kiss, and he passed up the chance.
She begins to hum softly, along with the tune of the song. Taylor’s singing ‘no proof, one touch, you felt enough’ and honestly Jake wants to laugh hysterically, because never has a lyric in a song been more accurate to his current predicament.
Amy looks up as she hears him snort softly, the disappointment shining in her eyes and Jake’s breath catches when he sees it, his stomach bottoming out.
“Eyes closed, head first, can’t lose.” Jake feels the words spilling out of his mouth, and Amy frowns, wetting her lips as she’s about to reply when Jake steps forward, one hand reaching up to cup her cheek again as the other wraps around her back so softly, and presses his lips to hers.
It’s at that minute that the song hits the lyrics ‘You can see it with the lights out’, and it’s so damn ironic because both Jake and Amy‘s eyes flutter shut, and behind their lids glitters gold and silver as their bodies entwine.
Amy distantly wonders if she should send Taylor Swift a thank-you letter, her hands coming up Jake’s back to curl in the hair at the top of his neck, feeling him curl her a little tighter to his body.
At some point the timer on the oven goes off, but they’re too wrapped up in each other to notice as Jake runs a hand through Amy’s hair and trails kisses down her jaw as she sighs and lightly scrapes her nails down his back over his hoodie.
The smell of burning rips her out of Jake’s arms, and she leaps for the oven mitts while Jake steadies himself with a hand against the wall. When she pulls out the cupcakes, they’re burnt on top.
“Oh fuck.” Amy puts the tray on the heat-proof mat, and Jake laughs.
“Yes, it was a very good kiss. Definitely curse worthy.”
“Shut up.” Amy grins back, swatting his arm playfully with the oven mitt while he lets his hand come up to trail along her cheek before tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.
“Good thing there’s more batter.” Jake smiles, upending the muffin tin over the bin as the burnt cupcakes spill out. They re-fill the pans with cupcake papers, and then batter before Jake puts them into the oven.
“No kissing while cupcakes are baking. Rule number one.” Amy smiles and Jake throws his hands up.
“One kiss and you’re already making rules? Oh my god, how am I so attracted to you?”
Amy just laughs, grabbing another bowl.
“Come on nerd, let’s make the icing.”
--
The cupcakes come out perfectly, and Jake helps Amy lift them out of the tins and onto a cooling rack.
“Hey, Ames?” he asks, turning his face to her as she sets the muffin tray aside to cool.
“Yeah?” she looks at him, noticing the cheeky smile on his lips as he leans forward and quickly catches her lips with his, hand winding around her lower back and pulling her a little closer.
“What was that for?” she asks, a little breathless as they pull apart.
“The cupcakes aren’t baking anymore.”
“I’ll allow it.” Amy grins, grabbing Jake by the sides of his hoodie and pulling him back to her for another kiss.
The cupcakes cool quickly as Jake ‘accidentally’ dots icing on Amy’s nose and cheeks and has to kiss it off, enjoying the giggles she makes and the way her fingers slide through his hair.
This afternoon has progressed so much better than he imagined.
They finish icing the cupcakes, and then Amy picks one up and puts it on the counter in front of him.
“Time to taste test.”
“Alright.” Jake picks it up, carefully pulling the wrapper away from the cake and taking a bite.
“Oh my god.” He groans, and Amy sighs sadly.
“I stuffed up again, didn’t I?”
“No, Ames. For real. These are so so good. I’m in heaven. Here.” He offers the cupcake to her, and she takes a bite.
There’s silence as the both of them chew slowly, Amy nodding.
“Those are actually pretty good.”
“Nailed it!” Jake grins, holding up his hand to give her a high-five. Amy slaps her hand against his and then squeals in delighted surprise when he sweeps her into his arms and presses a chocolatey kiss to her mouth.
When they break apart, she looks at the clock.
“Hey, it’s almost six. Do you want to stay? We could grab dinner. Or something.”
“Amy Santiago, did you just ask me on a date?” Jake gasps, enjoying the smile that breaks out on her face as she rolls her eyes.
“I did. Deal with it, Peralta.”
“I will! I’ll deal with it so much, I’ll even guarantee you a make-out session on your couch.”
Amy’s laughter is glorious, so Jake kisses her again.
--
The two of them head out together to pick up some dinner, settling on Italian (Jake chooses pizza, and Amy gets a pasta which they end up sharing with each other) before making themselves comfortable on Amy’s couch, watching John Wick.
After they’ve finished eating, Jake shuffles a little closer and drapes his arm casually over the back of the couch, and Amy smiles before leaning into his side.
Five hours later, they’re curled up in each other, wrapped in blankets as they watch Die Hard – at Jake’s insistence, occasionally stealing kisses from each other as Jake lets his hands run through Amy’s hair gently.
Jake’s saying the lines quietly along with the movie, hands still combing softly through Amy’s hair when he realises she’s fallen asleep, her head resting on his chest as she lies curled between his legs, the blanket pulled up to her chin. At some point she’d felt brave enough to shift to sitting in between his legs, her back to his chest as she’d laughed at him mumbling the lines and let her hands run up and down his legs comfortingly.
It’s probably the safest he’s felt in a long time, and Jake presses a kiss to the top of Amy’s head before he turns back to the movie.
He lets her sleep until two, and then he gently coaxes her awake, walks her through brushing her teeth (because she’d be appalled if she missed a brush session), and pulls back the covers so she can fall into bed.
It feels ridiculous, when he leans down to pull up the covers and she buries herself deeper under, kissing him on the cheek.
“Thanks, Jake. You’re the best.” She mumbles, and he laughs.
“Goodnight, Ames.” He presses a kiss to her nose, and she smiles as he turns off the light.
He lets himself out, and drives home shouting along to Taylor Swift’s ‘Love Story’, because nothing captures the mood he’s in better than singing along to love songs while he grins so hard his cheeks ache.
--
On Monday, Jake arrives at work late, much to Holt’s disdain.
“You’re twenty minutes early. Should you arrive in twenty-three and a half hours.”
Jake just nods, trying to fight off his grin as Rosa rolls her eyes.
A pink post-it-note is stuck underneath his rubik’s cube. He spots it immediately, glancing around before pulling it out and reading it.
I had a good weekend. Thanks, Pineapples.
It’s totally normal that his heart skips a little when he sees the small heart drawn in the bottom corner of the square of paper, and he glances up to find Amy smiling at him.
She gets up and goes to the break room, and Gina immediately lowers her phone and smiles at Jake.
“Amy made cupcakes, hope you’re ready to pay up.”
“Double stakes? Please?” Jake asks, pretending to be panicked as Gina smiles.
“Fine. Double stakes. If they’re great and you tell her the previous ones sucked, I’ll pay double. If not, you pay us double.”
“I’m in.” Rosa adds, appearing out of nowhere at the side of his desk. Jake jumps, glancing up at her as she stares down at him coolly.
“Okay. It’s on.” Jake smiles.
“Prepare to be in the crushing-est debt, ever.” Gina crows, standing up as the three of them move towards the break room.
Amy smiles when they come in.
“Hey, guys. What’re you doing?”
“Investigating baked goods. Because we’re all detectives who investigate. Except Gina.” Jake blurts out, and Gina smacks him in the arm.
“Bitch, I’m a social media detective. I can detect when someone’s fudging their tagged location.”
“Cool skills.” Amy nods, looking at them over the rim of her coffee mug.
“You baked again?” Gina asks, and Amy nods.
“Sure did. You guys want some?”
“Sure.” Jake pretends to be carefully choosing which one to pick, watching as Rosa rolls her eyes and grabs one, and Gina takes one after Jake.
“Thanks, Amy.”
“No worries! Enjoy!” Amy smiles and moves past them, going back to her desk.
Jake unwraps his cupcake, taking a bite and enjoying the taste of it as he smiles.
“Don’t lie to try get money either, because I’ll break your stupid kneecaps.” Rosa threatens, and Jake laughs nervously.
“No, I swear. This is actually really good.”
“You really are in love with her, boo. It’s tragic. Let me try.” Gina sighs, tentatively peeling the wrapping off hers and taking a bite. She chews for a minute, and then pauses before taking another bite. When she swallows it, she shoves the entire rest of the cupcake in her mouth and reaches for another.
“Holy Beyoncé, she’s done it.”
“No.” Rosa growls, tearing the wrapper off hers and taking a bite. A small moan escapes the back of her throat, and she stares at the cupcake.
“These are so good I want to eat them all.” Rosa admits, her eyes wide.
“How did this happen?!” Gina asks, as Jake grins and saunters out of the break room.
“Hey, Amy?” he calls across the bull-pen, and both she and Charles look up.
“Yeah?”
“These were really fantastic cupcakes.” He grins, seeing the light blush tinge her cheeks.
“Thanks, Jake.”
“Yeah, they were really good.” Rosa adds, and Gina nods as they emerge behind him and move towards her desk.
“Not bad, as far as cupcakes go. You know.” She waves her hand as she floats back to her desk, phone glued to her hand.
“I hope I don’t hurt your feelings, but they’re much better than all the other cupcakes that you made. I have no idea what changed, but you should keep doing that when you bake because these were the best. The others weren’t really good.” Jake says, trying not to grin the biggest he can while Amy laughs.
“I’m sorry you had to suffer through bad cupcakes. But yeah, I will keep doing what I did.” She grins back, and Charles makes a soft cooing noise until Rosa punches him in the shoulder.
Later, when Rosa and Gina pay him a total of $200, Jake throws the money up in the air and watches it flutter down around him while they scowl.
“I was going to buy a new spiked club.” Rosa glares, and Gina frowns.
“I was going to buy the new Beyoncé perfume.”
“Sorry, ladies.” Jake skips away before Rosa can try and beat him into giving the money back, tucking it safely into his wallet.
Later that day, he even sees Holt eating one of Amy’s cupcakes, tucked carefully behind a stack of papers.
That night, he texts Amy when he gets home after he’s showered and changed into his pjs, sitting on the couch with a beer in hand and junk food spread across the coffee table.
-Hey, Ames, wanna grab a meal on Wednesday? It’s on me.
-Sure, I’ll attend anything you pay for!
Jake spends the entire night, again, smiling like an idiot as he watches nature documentaries over his bag of Doritos.
--
On Wednesday, Jake takes Amy on the nicest date $200 can buy – dinner at a Japanese place, that conveniently serves a bacon and cheese sushi roll, as well as a roll that promises to be made of hamburger ingredients, with a fried chicken roll (apparently in Japan they fancy up fried chicken by calling it ‘Karaage’, whatever that means, Jake isn’t sure) for good measure. Amy laughs when he orders them off the menu, but he firmly sticks by his decision when she convinces him to eat a piece of what she calls ‘seared Salmon’ that tastes like slimy fish, and he almost pukes in the restaurant.
Jake just isn’t cut out for fancy food. But his deliciously trashy sushi is intensely satisfying, and Amy looks way too pretty in the lovely yellow dress she’s picked out, which Jake can’t take his eyes off her in so it’s the best date he’s ever been on. Even though he ate half-raw fish. Kind of. (It depends if ‘ate’ includes chewing for a second before spitting into a napkin.)
Afterwards, they walk around a nearby park, settling onto a bench to people-watch and snuggle on – Jake delights in the way that Amy shifts closer and tucks into his side when he puts his arm around her shoulders – and end up making out for five minutes before he offers to drive her home.
He kisses her goodbye at her door, which takes about fifteen minutes due to Amy being the best ever kisser and not wanting to let him go, before they part ways for the night promising to see each other the next day.
--
Rosa and Gina round on him the minute he gets to work, and he protests as they drag him off to the evidence locker.
“You and Santiago are dating, aren’t you?” Gina pokes Jake’s chest as he cowers against the shelves.
“I don’t know. Maybe. I guess. Yes.”
“I knew it! She was smiling way too much for a Thursday, normally she’s bummed the work week is almost over.” Gina smiles triumphantly, and Charles busts in.
“Jake, you’re dating Amy?! Oh my god! My dreams and hopes have come true!” he immediately bursts into tears, and Jake pats his shoulder awkwardly as he sobs.
“Did you help her with the cupcakes?” Rosa growls, grabbing the collar of Jake’s jacket.
“It totally doesn’t invalidate the bet if I did!” Jake protests, and she stamps her foot.
“Damn it Peralta!”
“You didn’t say I couldn’t help her! Besides she asked me.”
“You’re right. I hate you.” Rosa turns on her heel and stomps away, and Gina laughs.
“Well, I guess she really is a smart one.”
“What do you mean? Of course Amy’s smart.” Jake argues, and Charles breaks from sobbing to make a choked squeal.
“She made a move before you did. That makes her brilliant in my books,” Gina smirks, “Good luck, Jakey.” She pats his cheek and turns, making her way out of the room.
It takes Jake twenty minutes to get Charles to stop sobbing hysterically every time Jake smiles, or shrieking ‘You’re thinking about her, aren’t you?!’
--
Five years later, Amy and Jake are dancing around the kitchen making cupcakes – they’re a pretty well-oiled team, now. Jake reads out all of the measurements and Amy weighs them perfectly, Jake double-checks each step of the recipe and Amy follows his instructions as she stirs, beats, and mixes ingredients. They decorate half the cupcakes each, but this time instead of doing it together Jake insists on decorating his six on the other counter as Amy huffs playfully, sticking her tongue out at him. She’s Captain of her own precinct now, and Jake’s made it to Sergeant by some dumb amount of luck and months of incredible help, support and revision with Amy (she stress-braided her hair the week before his exam).
Jake pours everything into decorating his cupcakes, sprinkling hundreds and thousands over the icing as he stands back to admire his work. Sneaking a glance at Amy, he comes up behind her and wraps his arms around her waist.
“Almost done?” he asks, and she nods, leaning back into him as she peppers white chocolate pearls over the top.
“Perfect.”
“Yeah, you are.” Jake says, half joking but completely serious. He still remembers the first kiss with Amy in her kitchen, the way her skin felt against his.
“Let me see yours! Are you done yet?”
“I am.” Jake laughs, reaching over for the plate.
“I bet mine are better.” Amy sticks her tongue out, and Jake chuckles.
“Close your eyes. I’ll put them right beside yours and you can judge.”
“Okay.” Amy rolls her eyes but smiles, pressing a kiss to his cheek before closing her eyes. Jake sets his plate of cupcakes down carefully, reaching into his pocket before adding a final touch.
“Open.” He says, leaning his chin against her shoulder. Amy laughs as his breath tickles the skin of her neck and opens her eyes, her gaze roaming over their cupcakes before she freezes. A choked gasp escapes her lips, and she presses a hand to her mouth.
Will you marry me? Is placed on a pink post-it note attached to a toothpick that he’s stuck in one of the cupcakes, the rest of them covered in heart-shaped sprinkles and edible glitter.
“Jake?!” she whirls on the spot to face him, and he smiles, taking her hand as he drops down to one knee and produces a ring from his pocket.
“Amy, you make me the happiest person in the whole world and I can’t imagine doing anything without you by my side. I never want that to happen, will you marry me and make me the happiest man on the planet? You totally don’t have to say yes but it would be awks if you don’t.” he laughs, his eyes meeting hers as tears start flowing down her cheeks.
“God, yes.” Amy sobs, dropping down and throwing her arms around his neck as he laughs and laughs, a smile stuck to his face as he feels a few tears trickle down his own cheeks. It feels like his heart is exploding as he slides the ring on her finger once she stops crying and kissing him, and launches herself at him again to wrap her arms around him.
--
Charles screams for fifteen minutes straight when they tell him the news the next morning. And then he cries for one hour, before his sobs turn into wheezing, and the hiccups.
Gina just pats him on the back the whole time, gushing over Amy’s ring with her free hand.