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Hanzo was almost certain he was going to snap if Jesse sighed one more time.
He clacked his handheld closed and stared at the simple blue back of it as he spoke with a level voice.
“Jesse. I love you, with every fiber of my being. You are the light of my life and bring more joy to every day that you are with me than I have felt in the past ten years combined. But I swear to any higher power that may or may not exist, if you do not calm down, I am going to throw you out the window.”
“Hanzo. Sweetie, honeypie, I’m just-- I’m so b--”
“Bored, I know, you have been complaining all morning.” Hanzo looked over at him where he was sprawled out in the hotel room’s chair staring at the ceiling fan. “Bored and uncomfortably hot, we are both like that. Your incessant bitching won’t make you any cooler or more entertained.”
“Hanzooooooooo,” he whined.
Hanzo groaned and rolled his eyes. “If you wore less layers, perhaps you will be more comfortable. Are you not from a very warm place anyway?”
“Ain’t humid in New Mexico like it is here. Hoo, it’s like we’re swimmin’.” Jesse lazily picked at the buttons of his shirt anyway. “Wish we could actually go swimming.”
“I as well,” Hanzo admitted. “But we have to stay hidden--”
“For our own safety, blah blah,” Jesse finished. He sighed as he let his shirt flop open and leaned his head back. “Still sucks.”
“Mm,” Hanzo hummed in agreement, eyeing his boyfriend, wishing it wasn’t so damned hot that all he could do was enjoy the view. The thought of physical contact was nearly nauseating with this heat. “How long will it be before the hotel restores the air conditioning?”
“Hour? Two? Way too long.”
Hanzo grimaced and sat up. “Take that off and come here.”
Jesse lifted his head. “Okay.” He shrugged off his shirt and crossed the few feet to the bed.
Hanzo scooted over and patted beside him. “Your hair is long and covering your neck. Let me put it up for you.”
A smile crossed Jesse’s face and he sat down. “Well, thank you kindly, darlin’.”
Hanzo worked his fingers gently through Jesse’s thick hair, pulling back as much as he could from Jesse’s face. His hair wasn’t quite as long as Hanzo’s, so he couldn’t put it up in a high ponytail like Hanzo preferred his own, but he did the best he could. He silently thanked Doctor Ziegler for giving him the idea to carry around hair ties.
Jesse sighed as Hanzo’s fingers left his hair. “That’s a might bit better. You’re a blessing.”
“You cannot wear your hat with this,” Hanzo told him.
“Got it.” Jesse turned so he could give Hanzo a kiss, keeping a bit of distance. He sighed yet again as he pulled back. “Dammit, if it weren’t so hot we could definitely have found a much more fun way of heating the room.”
Hanzo chuckled. “Of course. As much as I wish otherwise… as very, very much I wish otherwise… we are stuck like this.”
Jesse grimaced and flopped on his back, trying to keep himself sprawled out. “This is homophobia, ain’t it?”
“Homophobia?” Hanzo started laughing.
“Yeah, it’s too hot to kiss my gorgeous boyfriend. That’s homophobia. It’s wrong, I tell ya, honey, this is plain ol’ discrimination by Mother Nature.”
“You are absolutely ridiculous.” Hanzo shook his head, still smiling. “At least we are together, and hopefully Lena and the rest of the team can come to back us up tomorrow so we will not be stuck here for too much longer.”
“The cavalry’s comin’,” Jesse grumbled, twisting his words with a poor mimicry of Lena’s accent. “Ain’t comin’ soon enough, if you ask me.”
“Complaining will not fix the problem.”
“Let me moan and groan, I’m a grumpy old man, okay?”
“I am older than you.”
“Shhh. Let me have this.”
Hanzo nudged him with his foot and leaned back, opening his handheld game again. “Whatever you want, my love. Go nuts, but do not expect me to sit here and listen to your whining. I have Pokemon to train.”
Jesse sat up and shifted on the bed to lay on his stomach beside him, craning his neck to look at the screens. Hanzo lowered the game so Jesse could see. “Aw, that one’s cute.”
“Deerling? It is quite adorable.”
“Are you gonna catch it?”
“I already have one, though… this one is female, and the one I have is male…”
“Why can’t Pokemon be gay, Hanzo?”
“I’m not in charge of Pokemon. I don’t know. I’m sure there are gay pokemon.”
“Probably Rapidash. You would like that one.”
“Ain’t that the flamey unicorn?”
“Yes.”
“Hell yeah. I like that one, so it’s gay.”
“No flaming horses for straight people?”
“Nope, not one flaming horse for any straight person.” Jesse grinned at him.
“Here, I’ll catch this Deerling, and you can name her, if you want.” Hanzo tapped the screen with the nail of his thumb; he’d lost the stylus again.
“Sure thing.” Jesse watched the little character toss the Pokeball and the Deerling vanish inside. One, two, three wiggles, and it clicked shut with a celebratory jingle.
“Ah, good, one try, I was getting low on Pokeballs anyway.” Hanzo offered the handheld.
Jesse used the joysticks and buttons instead of fumbling with the touch screen. Hanzo waited until he passed it back to read the name.
“Cherry Blossom? That’s adorable.”
“Reminds me of you, and ‘cause she’s all pink.”
Hanzo leaned down to give him a chaste kiss. “You are lovely. Thank you.”
“Does Deerling turn into anything else? Evolve?”
“Yes, that’s right, and she does. Into… Sawsbuck, I believe? That sounds correct.” Hanzo nodded. “There are so many Pokemon. It is difficult to keep them all straight.”
“Yeah, that’s why they’re not. Pokemon is gay, Hanzo, it’s gay, straight people can’t have Pokemon.”
Hanzo started laughing again. “That is fair enough. I suppose the only thing I can keep straight is my aim.”
“I sure am glad about that.”
“Me, too.”
“Are you gonna catch more Pokemon? Which ones do you have? Do you have that cool dog one with the bones?”
“One thing at a time, my love, I’ll go back to town and show you my Pokemon. I am sure I have a Houndoom somewhere. I can take it to be renamed if you would like to name it.”
“I’d be honored to.”
The heat wasn’t so unbearable, for a while. It still didn’t stop them from cheering when the air conditioning kicked back in, and neither certainly felt inclined to dress again.
Though they still stayed lounging around playing Pokemon for quite a while.