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Mark was staring at Jinyoung's sleepy face while the other caressed Mark's cheeks. It was one of those nights where the couple would just lie on their bed after all the stresses they've got at work. Though, this night, Mark sensed something in Jinyoung's eyes, so he tried to lighten his partner's mood by talking to him.
"Nyoungie" said Mark, while he reached out to caress Jinyoung's hair.
"Hmmm?" Jinyoung asked while embracing his boyfriend's waist and closing his eyes.
Mark stopped for a moment before resuming what he has to say.
"Uhmm... Can- can we just stay like this forever? I mean, this line's too cliche but..."
Jinyoung, felt like he just woke up to a dream and pulled away from the hug. He stared at Mark, who was now raising one of his eyebrows, waiting for his reply. Nobody said a word and Mark was beginning to get nervous when Jinyoung suddenly spoke.
"I..." his voice was so broke, so little, but enough for Mark to hear and feel his hesitation. "Sorry Mark. You know I don't do permanent things. I don't think we can-"
"But why?!" Mark cut him off and Jinyoung was surprised to see Mark's reaction. "Why can't we be like this Nyoung? Everything's okay, right? You like me and I like you! What's stopping you?" Mark hold his hand, only to put it on his left cheek. Jinyoung can see the pain in his eyes and he couldn't help but feel hurt too. Jinyoung moved his other hand, and cupped both of Mark's cheeks. he moved closer until their foreheads touched. He let out a deep sigh.
"It's... complicated, Mark. I know that you are hurting but I am, too! You know how much I love you, right? I really really like you but I don't know about you!"
Mark gave Jinyoung a confused look. "Wait, what? What about me?"
Jinyoung can't hide all of these anymore. Maybe these will break them apart but this is just too much to be kept. "Well, I know that you like me. I know about your feelings and I appreciate that but... what if? What if what you're feeling right now is just temporary? What if it's just a phase? What if you realize that you like girls more? What if you'll leave me? Like my parents did? What if you'll hate me once you'd get to know more about me? Like how my friends did? What if-"
"YAH PARK JINYOUNG!"
Jinyoung flinched when he heard Mark's loud voice. Again. "JUST WHO DO YOU TAKE ME FOR, HUH?!" Jinyoung closed his eyes and lowered his head (Shit, I screwed up again. He's going to leave me. I can sense it. This is all my fault.). Tears began to well up on his eyes when he felt those familiar hands around his waist. He puts his head on Mark's shoulder and cried himself out.
"SShh... Nyoungie. It's alright baby. I'm sorry for shouting. Don't cry" Mark's voice softened. Jinyoung continued to cry in his arms, and so, Mark just let him be. When he felt that Jinyoung's starting to calm down, he started to talk again.
"Hey. Hey, Nyoung, baby. Look at me, please? But Jinyoung didn't. Mark still continued to talk. "You see, Nyoung, each and everyone of us thinks differently. We all have different point of views in life. What I mean is that, I am different from all those people you've just mentioned earlier." Mark caressed his head again and resumed to what he was saying. "I am hurt you know? Did you forget that I was the one who confessed to you? The one who loved you first? I've loved you more than you'd ever think of. I love your eyes, and the ways those crinkled when you smile. I love your lips, especially when it touches mine. I love your smile. It brightens up my day and makes me feel okay when I am not. I love your hands", and then Mark started to reach for his hands and kissed them,"-they're warm, soft and comfy. And I love", Mark lifted his chin up so he could see Jinyoung, who was now blushing real hard when their eyes locked, he continued.
"I love you. When I say, you, I mean all of you. Even your negative sides. Your flaws, your dark secrets, and everything that you've been hiding. Because that's what makes you MY Jinyoung. They're part of the million reasons why I love you." Hearing those things from someone you cherish, it's completely different. Jinyoung can't stop his tears from falling. He can't stop his heart from swelling. Because of happiness. Because of Mark. "So don't ever think about that again. Don't doubt my feelings for you, oksy? Don't belittle me and my feelings because they're bigger than the universe and deeper than all the seas and oceans combined- OUCH! What was that for?!" Jinyoung hit him on his chest and chuckled. His face is still red from all the crying and all the blushing. His eyes were still swollen and he knew he looked like shit right now but he didn't care. He took a deep breath and faced Mark.
"I love you, Mark. And I'm sorry. Sorry if I doubted your love, if I belittled your feelings. God, I really really really love you." He kissed Mark's face starting from his forehead, down to his cheeks and then he kissed his nose, and finally gave a peck on his lips. "And to answer your question earlier... No. We could not stay like this forever because we'll be so much more than this. We'll love each other more. You and I, we'll be together as long as we live. We'll create much more memories, better than the ones we have right now."
When Jinyoung finished, Mark did it. He thinks that words are not needed anymore and so he kissed him, letting his emotions fill in. Jinyoung responded with equal passion and the two shared their night like any other couples.