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Neither woman was sure why they’d forgone their usual routine of curling up on the sofa together once the children were in bed, choosing instead to head to their own bedroom intending to watch a film together, a film that had been forgotten the second Bernie’s lips met Serena’s, and instead they’d spent almost half an hour laid on the bed, simply kissing and holding each other.
Serena knew Bernie wouldn’t make the first move, wouldn’t take the next step, knew she’d be worried about doing the wrong thing, would worry about ‘pushing’ Serena into something she didn’t want to do, so, as she felt Bernie’s tongue fight against her own, she gently wrapped one of her hands around Bernie’s wrist, slowly moving the blonde’s hand from her hip to her chest, “Serena” Bernie whispered, breaking the kiss slightly.
“It’s okay” Serena whispered back, “if it’s okay with you then it’s okay with me.”
Bernie nodded, pressing her lips to Serena’s again as she gently squeezed her hand, deepening the kiss when she heard Serena gasp and moan at the action, “you like that?” she mumbled.
Serena nodded as she bit gently on Bernie’s lower lip, “Mhmm.”
They stayed like that for a while, Bernie’s lips not moving from Serena’s, her hand not moving from Serena’s chest but eventually her confidence grew, “can I?” she asked as she slipped her hand under the hem of Serena’s top, letting her fingers trail over Serena’s skin until they brushed over the simple cotton of the nursing bra she wore to make things easier on the rare occasion that Ellie still woke for a feed in the night.
“Bernie” Serena groaned softly, shuffling closer, not that she thought that was possible, “please” she reached around herself to undo her bra, “please Bernie.” Bernie slid the straps of Serena’s bra down her arms, making eye contact with Serena and getting a simple nod in response before her hands made contact with Serena’s bare skin. It wasn’t long before Bernie felt a tug at her own pyjama top, “can I…?” Serena mumbled. Bernie nodded and Serena pulled both her tshirt and the sports bra she was wearing over her head before trailing her own hands up Bernie’s torso towards her chest.
“You erm, you don't have to” Bernie said softly as she felt Serena’s hands reach their destination, “I know I haven't got much…”
“Nonsense” Serena kissed Bernie’s lips, “I've only got small hands, and well…” she gently squeezed her hands to make a point, causing Bernie to gasp and close her eyes as Serena nibbled at her neck, “who needs more than a handful anyway?”
“But you…”
“I'm not you” Serena told Bernie between kisses, her hands still working over Bernie's chest, “you're more toned and muscular than me, I'm curvier than you, that's nothing to be ashamed of. Life would be boring if everybody, and every body was the same.”
Bernie had never thought that someone’s voice could be a turn on, but she was sure Serena's voice was turning her insides to jelly, she could barely concentrate on Serena's words as her thumbs swiped at the sensitive skin underneath her breasts, but that didn't deter Serena as she continued with her lecture.
“I want you to forget what Marcus, what anyone else told you. Your body, you, are bloody perfect, you are beautiful, you're strong…” Serena briefly squeezed Bernie’s biceps before turning her attention back to Bernie's chest, driving her wild, “and I love you. Exactly. As. You. Are” she punctuated each of the last four words with a kiss along Bernie's neck and jaw before kissing her lips once she'd finished.
Bernie groaned and arched closer to Serena, barely able to mumble “I love you too” against Serena's lips between kisses.
They spent a while exploring each other’s bodies, enjoying the contact of skin on skin, both used to being physically close, but both enjoying the newness, both enjoying the sensation of skin on skin, of hands roaming curves that were already so familiar, but yet seemed so new without the thin barrier of clothing between them.
“Bernie” Serena mumbled softly, arching her body closer to her partner’s.
“Do you want to?” Bernie asked softly, “we erm, we don’t have to, if you’re not ready or…”
“Bernie” Serena placed her index finger on her lips, “I’m fine, I trust you Darling, we both know that if we want to stop then we only have to say, we’ll do this at a pace that’s comfortable for us okay, if we decide we just want to kiss and cuddle then that’s what we’ll do.”
Bernie nodded, so close to Serena that their lips were almost touching, “I know, I just want this to be perfect, for both of us.”
Serena brushed Bernie’s hair from her face, “I’m with you, it will be perfect” she whispered, “it’ll be us, just us, and no matter what happens, that’s all I want Bernie, just you.”
Bernie closed the tiny gap to kiss Serena, “I love you.”
“I love you too” Serena replied, slipping her hands around Bernie to rest in the small of her back as she kissed her again.
Serena wouldn’t call herself inexperienced in the bedroom, she’d had her fair share of partners, probably more than her fair share by some people’s standards, but sex with Bernie was unlike anything she’d ever experienced before, Bernie was so soft, so gentle, made her feel so loved that Serena was surprised to feel tears pricking at her eyes as she reached her climax. With any other lover she’d probably have been frustrated, annoyed about their constant need to check she was okay, but not with Bernie, she knew just how nervous she was, knew she was worried about hurting Serena, about their relationship moving too fast. Instead she realised that Bernie’s constant need for reassurance came out of the love she had for Serena, and a desire to make sure she was comfortable with the way the evening had played out.
“Serena” Bernie whispered, holding her closely and kissing her hair, “are you okay?”
Serena nodded as she nuzzled into Bernie, as always, her body draping over the blonde’s, “perfect” she whispered as her fingers trailed lazily over Bernie’s bare stomach, tracing patterns over her faded stretch marks, wondering how on earth she managed to stay so toned after having two children.
“You’re crying” Bernie ran her fingers under Serena’s eyes to catch her tears, “did I hurt you?”
“No” Serena answered quickly before brushing her lips against Bernie’s, “quite the opposite really” she admitted, “no one’s ever made me feel quite so loved.”
Bernie smiled and kissed Serena again, “I’m glad to hear it” she said, gently catching Serena’s wrist, entwining their fingers as she felt her hand slip lower, “you don’t need to” she whispered.
“But you haven’t…”
“It doesn’t matter” Bernie smiled as Serena dropped kisses to Bernie’s collar bone, “we’ve got all the time in the world.”
“Are you sure?”
Bernie nodded and gently kissed Serena again, “of course, let’s put some clothes on in case the kids come in in the morning and get some rest.”
Serena nodded, falling even more in love with Bernie when the blonde stood from the bed, pulling her top back on before helping Serena back into her own pyjamas, “I do love you Bernie” she smiled sleepily.
Bernie chuckled and knelt on the edge of the bed to kiss Serena’s lips before climbing over her to get back onto her side of the mattress, “I know” she smiled, “and I love you too Serena, so, so much.”