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There was about three feet of snow on the ground. Everyone was freezing. Literally no one wanted to be on that godforsaken rock of a planet. And yet, Yondu dragged the whole crew there kicking and screaming (until he whistled) for the sake of a photoshoot.
“Cap’n, what the hell?” Kraglin groaned as Yondu plunged through the snow. His boots, carefully laced up over the bottom of his pant legs, made deep holes as he practically jumped from spot to spot, eyes scouring the horizon for the best backgrounds. With these Alp like mountains all around them, it wouldn’t be too hard.
“Kraglin, I ain’t got over 200 likes on an instagram in a week now!” Yondu grumbled and leapt forward like a fox into a pristine patch of snow. He smiled proudly at the cleanliness of the circle around him. Now he’d look like he never even walked there if the ground happened to be in the photo he posted.
“Again,” Kraglin said, “what the hell?” He marched right up to the captain, completely ignoring the clear spot of fresh powder surrounding Yondu’s feet.
“Kraglin!” Yondu whined. “Yah made a mess o’ the snow I specifically didn’t step in!” Kraglin shrugged.
“Cap’n, half the crews’ freezin’ tuh death. Look! Some of the reptilian crew ‘ave already frozen up!” He pointed to a group of ravagers prying some scaled lower deck worker from the ground and wrapping her in a group hug. Odd for Ravagers to show affection, but in this case it was literally necessary to save a life.
Yondu shrugged. “Dem cold bloodeds shoulda packed a heating pad like I did,” he muttered and called out his arrow. “Now take out some kinda camera and don’t screw with tha snow ‘round me! Its gotta look perfect.” He grasped round the arrow and whistled himself out of the patch before descending into yet another clean spot. Kraglin shook his head.
“It ain’t every day I getta wear a new jacket,” Yondu called and Kraglin lumbered over. Stepping through deep snow was easier when you have longer legs, but that didn’t stop clots of it sliding into his boot and melting directly into his socks.
“If I get sick ‘cause of this, yer gonna owe me some!” he snarled as yet another drip slid down his ankle.
“Yeah, yeah, you’ll be fine!” Yondu assured and paced in a small circle designated as Where He Would Allow Himself To Walk. Kraglin shook his head.
The cold was really starting to seep into his bones despite the higher metabolism Xandarians boasted of. He could feel the snot in his nose drip dangerously close to his nostrils and swiped above his lip angrily with a sniff. The photographic holopad was stuck to his belt and clanged against his hip with every exaggerated step.
Yondu practiced his poses while Kraglin set up the holopad. Stick a butt out in one direction, lift arms seductively in another. Maybe do a slight sit until he was practically in chair pose. Stand and lean on one hip, pushing the other to the side with hands gather on his waist, snarl something nasty at the gathering Ravager audience. Maybe an artsy shot of the arrow trail tracing a snowflake shape above his head as he looks at it, back to the camera.
Kraglin refused to admit the captain’s butt looked pretty good as he poked it out for a pose. Instead, he fiddled with the settings on the camera with an irritated huff. No way he was going to allow himself to enjoy this impromptu and potentially fatal photo op.
“Darlin’, is the camera set?” Yondu asked sweetly, whistling the arrow in wavy lines bordering the horizon.
“Yeah,” Kraglin mumbled and lifted the holopad up, letting the green take predominant color over what would be in the picture. Yondu smiled and began posing again, growling with every new position.
“Get mah good side, wouldja?” he ask, twisting his face this way and that.
“That even possible, cap’n?” Kraglin complained and snapped a few more photos, careful to capture the incredulous look sent in reply. That one would be a keeper. Yondu huffed and went back to posing.
“Only a few more,” Yondu promised as Kraglin shifted his hands and sighed. “Then I’ll point out mah favorite shots and we can get us a few more o’ those.”
“God damn it!” Kraglin exclaimed, but kept taking photos. His arms were starting to ache. Yondu giggled, a rare sound, and Kraglin managed a photo of an actual smile on the captain’s face. The red in his jacket stood out against the snow as he spun it for a cool action shot Kraglin knew was never going to be anything better than a blur.
“Hang on, I wanna try summin’,” Yondu said.
Dear God… thought Kraglin but still held the camera. Yondu began whistling and Kraglin walked backward a few steps to try and get whatever Yondu was drawing into the frame. Unfortunately, there was a rock sitting under the snow which Kraglin failed to notice until he was buried three feet deep in powdered cold. Yondu turned and saw a hole in the snow. He nearly fell over himself laughing.
“Kraglin!” He cried, then doubled over as two zombie hands rose upwards from the hole. “Are yah-” Deep inhalation and then extreme laugher- “Are y’alright?” Kraglin sat up, shivering entirely as the cold and wet settled around him. The snow under his butt creaked menacingly, but never gave way.
“I swear yah owe me so much right about now,” Kraglin yelled as he sat up. Yondu hadn’t even moved from his spot to help, the bastard.
“Owe yah what?” Yondu laughed.
“Damn you, yah know!” Kraglin snarled. By then the crew had turned to see a powdered Kraglin attempting to stand up without tipping into the snow or making a new hole while their captain, scourge of the galaxy, laughed his ass off. Someone raised their own holopad before Kraglin spotted it and growled more menancingly than Yondu could ever whistle.
“This better be damned worth it,” Kraglin muttered as he went back to finding a spot from which all the arrow could be seen. Yondu snorted and turned his back. He looked up and whistled softly. Some old song about letting it snow and then there was a great red snowflake outlined against high rising mountains, the light of the local star cutting between clouds and rises in beams slicing through the art. It fell like a spotlight around Yondu and lit up the undisturbed snow around his feel.
Kraglin took the picture with seconds to spare before a cloud shuffled through and dimmed the effect. The red of the snowflake turned to smoke and drifted into air. And Yondu? Yondu figured then was a good time to try a snow angel making shot and threw himself into the snow, cackling the entire time.
“Come stand over me and get this!” Yondu called. Kraglin rolled his eyes and marched over, following orders as always.