Archive of Our Own

Jaebum fiddled nervously with the edge of his sleeve.

He could feel it; getting the name of your soulmate engraved on your arm like a tattoo was supposed to be the best experience of your life, but fuck, no one had told Jaebum it would hurt this much.

He supposed it was like getting a tattoo at a parlour, the pain intense but worth it for some, but for someone like him, who has numerous piercings up and down each ear, he figured he would be used to the pain.

But no, of course not.

The pain was slowly increasing now; at first it was just a dull ache, but now he could feel it, red and throbbing, sweat collecting itself on his temples. He curled up on the sofa, clutching his arm as he screwed his eyes shut in agony. He grabbed his phone, sitting idly on the table, and called the first person he could think of.

“Mark,” He croaked out, once the line connected.

“Jaebum? You okay?” Mark asked, concerned. He knew when his best friend was in pain, he could hear it immediately.

“It’s happening. Fuck, you didn’t tell me it would hurt this bad,” He managed to choke out. Mark immediately knew what Jaebum meant, what he had wanted for the last four years after Mark was matched with Jackson.

“Because mine didn’t hurt that much. I already have a tattoo, remember? I’m used to the pain.” He teased.

“I feel like my entire arm is burning.” The line went silent for a moment as Mark considered his words.

“Huh. That’s not really supposed to happen. I mean, I’ve heard of it before, but I’ve never really seen anyone experience it. Supposedly that means your love is gonna be strong.” Mark giggled.

“Yeah, right. You said yours didn’t hurt that much yet you and Jackson are hopelessly in love.” Jaebum seethed irritably. Mark’s laugh sounded tiny across the line.

“Just hang in there, Jaebummie, you’ll be fine,” Mark laughed once again, before the line went dead. Jaebum stared at his phone, annoyed. He loved Mark, he really did, but would it really kill his best friend to be more supportive?

Jaebum followed his advice nonetheless, eventually passing out when the pain became too much to bare.

The following morning he woke up, suddenly remembering the previous night’s events. He gingerly lifted up his arm, to see the number there, engraved in his skin. He traced over it lightly with his fingers, feelings of excitement and nervousness exploding in his stomach as he wondered who his soulmate would be. Was it someone he already knew, or someone he would later meet? Jaebum supposed it was a good thing that he was single at the moment, not that he had really been in a meaningful relationship for a while now. Sometimes he felt lonely though, when Jackson and Mark had found each other when they were both 20. Four years later and they were both basically married, or acted that way anyway. Jaebum, on the other hand, lived alone, in a nice high rise apartment in the nice part of Seoul, where he worked as a freelance photographer. He had made quite a name for himself within the industry, a fact that pleased his ego.

He picked up his phone, checking numerous messages from Mark and Jackson, demanding to know who his soulmate was. He rolled his eyes, instead walking to his laptop on the other side of the room, switching it on and anxiously skirting his fingers over the keyboard, waiting for the database to load.

Everyone was required to enter their details in to the database, and lay out a basic profile so that people could easily find their soulmate. In another world, this would be extremely creepy, Jaebum thought to himself, but the database had been around for as long as he could remember, and perhaps meeting your soulmate through it was somewhat romantic. He carefully copied the numbers out into the search bar at the top of the screen, and waited impatiently as it sifted through hundreds of thousands of people to find a match. The computer made a quick buzz to alert that it had found the match, and Jaebum clicked it open.

Park Jinyoung.

Jaebum furrowed his eyebrows a bit. He didn’t know a Park Jinyoung, so he supposed he had yet to meet his soulmate. He clicked on pictures, his screen displaying some. The first one he clicked on was what he presumed to be Park Jinyoung now. Jaebum couldn’t help the way he stared just for a little too long. The man in the picture was beautiful, breathtakingly beautiful. He must have been around Jaebum’s age, with dark hair styled to perfection that framed soft features, large eyes and pouty lips.
“Park Jinyoung,” Jaebum found himself muttering his name, feeling the way it fell off his lips. He couldn’t help the way the edges of his lips quirked up into a smile; this man was definitely his type. He could only hope his personality was as promising as his good looks.

But then Jaebum felt his breath hitch when he moved to the next photo. He blinked a couple of times, hand shaking visibly now. No. This couldn’t be right. No no no no, he thought over again and again in his mind. He knew the name Park Jinyoung had sounded familiar to him, but he never imagined this.

Staring back at him was the man in question, probably from his middle school or high school days, and Jaebum felt the guilt flood him from the inside, slowly dragging and drowning him. Jaebum had a lot of things in his past to be regretful for, but he figured this one had to definitely make the top 3. Because when he sees the man he hadn’t seen in over ten years, looking happy without Jaebum in his life, the older boy couldn’t bare to re-enter it, and cause him the misery he had the first time. Of course, Jaebum was significantly different to his middle school self, but it didn’t change the fact that he had made fourteen year old Park Jinyoung’s life miserable. By some horrible coincidence of fate, here he was looking at his picture again, his soulmate. He wondered idly if Jinyoung had already got his soulmate digits, and chose to ignore it after finding out who they belonged to. He wasn’t sure why, but he hoped this wasn’t the case.

Jaebum hastily grabbed his keys and phone, exiting his apartment and running all the way across town to Mark and Jackson’s apartment. Jackson sleepily opened the door to Jaebum’s incessant knocking, looking rather annoyed when he saw his best friend on the other side.

“It’s 8AM, whatever you have to say better be urgent,” Jackson grumbled, as a sleepy Mark stumbled out of their bedroom.

“It’s Park Jinyoung,” Jaebum all but screamed out, still trying to catch his breath.

“Who?” Mark asked, rubbing his eyes.

“My soulmate. It’s Park Jinyoung.” Jaebum explained.

“So?” Jackson asked. “Not everyone knows their soulmate when they are matched, you have to go find him.” Jackson added.

“No, no. I already know him. So do you guys. Come on, Park Jinyoung, don’t you remember?” Mark and Jackson were quiet for a moment, thinking.

“No?” Mark stated, more like a question.

“The kid from our middle school. Before we all became friends. He was in our class, but he left before high school because of-“

“Oh my god! The poor guy you and those evil friends of yours bullied senseless!” Jackson exclaimed. Jaebum visibly cringed. Mark looked at him sympathetically.

After Jinyoung had left, Jaebum had felt so bad, he ended up in a huge fight with his (then) friends, and never spoke to any of them again, quickly becoming friends with Mark and Jackson soon after.

“Yeah. Him.” Jaebum sighed, flopping down onto the sofa.

“Maybe this is fate’s crazy way of telling you that you should apologise. Remember how hard you tried to find him after he left? Maybe you can finally apologise to him.” Jackson reasoned. Jaebum shook his head.

“I don’t think it’s fair. He looks happy, without me in his life. I don’t think it’s fair of me to waltz back into it. He probably hates me. I wouldn’t blame him.” Jaebum held his head in his hands.

“Look. You’ve changed, and he probably has too. If you don’t find him Jaebum, you’ll end up alone forever. And he will too. Don’t you think you owe it to yourself, and him too, to at least talk to each other? You don’t have to fall in love, but I think it would be better for everyone if you just went and saw him. You never know, you might even end up being friends.” Mark said, placing a reassuring hand on Jaebum’s back. “How will you know if you never try?” He smiled softly at Jaebum, whilst Jackson nodded his head enthusiastically.

Jaebum left Mark and Jackson’s apartment soon after that, to mull over their words. Something that both Mark and Jackson knew all too well, however, was Jaebum’s decisive nature; once he had decided to go, he would follow through with it. Sooner or later, curiosity would get the better of him, and he would go. What they hadn’t realised is that day would come only five days later, as Jaebum scribbled down Jinyoung’s address onto a scrap paper and took the first bus out of Seoul the following morning, with nothing but his backpack and a determination to right his wrongs.

—-

The bus journey was long, and Jaebum stared out the window, watching the clouds as they painted a picture in front of him. He snapped a couple pictures on his phone, the green landscape and rolling hills prettily being captured in the lens. Around the six hour mark, Jaebum fell asleep, only to be awoken a couple of hours later by an older large man who shook his shoulder.

“Bus terminates here, kiddo.” He stated, before making his way back down the aisle and off the bus. Jaebum took a couple of seconds to compose himself, blinking a couple of times to wake himself up as he stretched slightly, grabbing his bag and slinging it over his shoulder. The warm air greeted him as he exited off the bus. He looked around, the gravel under his shoes obnoxiously loud.

“Excuse me sir?” He said to the man from before. “Can you tell me how to get to here?” He asked, showing him the scribbled note with Jinyoung’s address.

“Ah yes! That’s right by the sea. About half a mile up the road, that way.” The man said, pointing behind him at a small pathway that opened out to a pathway over some cliffs.

“Thank you,” Jaebum bowed deeply at the man, before heading in the direction he has stated.

Jaebum walked for a while, before coming across a single small shop, deciding to go in and get something to eat. He sat at the window, eating his ramen and watching the outside. He had to admit, the small village was a sharp contrast to the hustle and bustle of Seoul, where he only had to look out of his window to see loads of cars driving, and the city lit up in the glow of neon lights when darkness kissed the city.

Here though, there was only serenity. The small pathway only saw one or two people walk by every 10 minutes, the shop eerily quiet. The window overlooked the sea though, and Jaebum hadn’t seen the sea in many years, so he watched it for quite some time, even though it was mid January and probably freezing. After a while, he got up, exiting the shop with the address burning a hole in his pocket. He stopped once more outside the shop window, fixing his black hoodie and ripped light blue skinny jeans, for what reason he wasn’t really sure. He supposed he just didn’t want Jinyoung to see him looking awful after ten years.

Jaebum finally began to come across some houses along the path, lots of small one bedroom apartments and smaller shops tucked in between the houses. He could see why a place like this would appeal to Jinyoung; he has always been the reflectful kind, but he catches himself on the thought. Ten years is a long time, and he shouldn’t assume anything of Jinyoung anymore. The boy he had once known was a man now. Eventually he finds Jinyoung’s house, a small apartment that blends seamlessly into the others around it, and he tenses a little as he stares at the door contemplating his next move.

He decides to knock anyway, considering he had come this far. He knocks, once, twice and a third time, hearing voices behind the door.

“I got it eomma!” He hears a deep voice shout, and before he can think anything more of it the door is swinging open, revealing a man of a similar age, dark hair framing his pale skin, wearing a t shirt and shorts with bare feet. The man’s eyes widen at seeing him, and before Jaebum can do anything, even smile, the door is slammed shut.

—-

Jinyoung breathed heavily, hand still clutching at his chest where his heart is, back against the door. He couldn’t believe it, this couldn’t be happening. That couldn’t be who he thought it was. But Jinyoung had always been observant and good at remembering things (holding a grudge too), and he would recognise those two eye moles anywhere. What is he doing here? He thinks to himself, his thoughts incomprehensible. Jinyoung hadn’t seen Jaebum for over ten years, ever since that fateful day where he had left in the middle of the night with his mother and never looked back. But it couldn’t be him right? It couldn’t be Im Jaebum, right? Why would he be looking for him ten years later, and more so, how did he find where he lived in the first place? Jinyoung’s mind was riled up with unanswered questions, when a voice muffled by the door infiltrated its way through his inner turmoil.

“Jinyoungie?” The other man asked from the other side of the door, and Jinyoung cringe at the nickname. Jaebum and his friends used to call him that as a joke when he was younger, and the only person he allowed to still call him that was his mother.

“Come on Jinyoung, I know you’re still there. I can explain, if you just open the door.” Jaebum said tiredly from the other side. Jinyoung’s hand shaked dangerously hard, but he still found himself opening the door, if only a fraction, observing the older man.

Jinyoung would be lying if he said Jaebum hadn’t drastically changed since he last saw him, although that would be expected. What he hadn’t expected however, was for him to have matured so nicely. His dark hair was parted on the side and slicked over, showing his forehead. His ears were decorated with many piercings, and his broad shoulders were covered with a black hoodie that looked soft to touch. Jaebum’s ripped jeans were enough of an indication to tell someone on the street that he wasn’t from this quiet town, other than the fact that everyone knew each other here.

He shifted uncomfortably under Jinyoung’s gaze.

“What are you doing here?” Jinyoung asked, but the question was lost when his voice cracked at the end. Jaebum visibly flinched, eyebrows stitched up in what looked like guilt.

“It’s been a long time Jinyoung. You look good,” Jaebum said instead, but Jinyoung ignored the compliment.

“Yeah, well.” Jinyoung said instead, finding his voice once more and holding his ground. Jinyoung’s mother and friends had always told him he was stubborn, and he was sure going to show it. The Jaebum that had bullied him senseless when he was younger was not going to have any power over him now. Jinyoung was 23 years old now, he had good friends, a nice family, a stable job and a quiet life. He did not need any interruptions.

He opened the door a little wider this time, straightening up under Jaebum’s gaze to find they were virtually the same height.

“You didn’t answer my question. Why are you here?” Jinyoung asked again.

“Is this where you live now?” Jaebum asked, peering in behind him at the small apartment. Jinyoung scoffed back a laugh.

“Seriously? You’re not going to answer my questions, even after all this time. You have some nerve, Jaebum, coming to find me here.”

“Jaebum-hyung.” He corrected out of habit from having to make Jackson do it, but visibly stiffened when Jinyoung actually laughed this time, cold.

“I don’t think so. You lost my respect a long time ago.” Jinyoung stated.

“Jinyoung. Look, I came to say I’m sorry. For everything.”

“Sorry doesn’t pay for the damage. Your apology is not accepted. Now leave, before I make you.” Jinyoung snapped. Jaebum visibly deflated, before his jaw jutted out in irritancy.

“It’s been ten years Jinyoung. Just let it go.” He sighed.

“I had let it go. I was perfectly happy never seeing you again. You’re the one that found my address, which can I add, is kinda creepy, and found me after ten years. You’re the one that knocked on my door. So if anything, you need to get over it.” Jinyoung raged. Jaebum looked down at the floor, rage gone.

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry Jinyoungie. For everything. I really am. I’ll leave now, but I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me, one day.” Jaebum sounded genuinely remorseful, and it took every ounce of Jinyoung’s being to keep playing the role of the mean guy in the situation.

Instead he offered a tight lipped smile, before shutting the door between them once again, albeit more gently this time.

—-

Jaebum cursed at his luck. Not only had he completely messed up his chances of ever reconciling with Jinyoung, but he had also missed the last bus out of the small village, the next one not until the following morning.

The night air was becoming cooler, and Jaebum crossed his arms over his chest in a small attempt to stay warm. This small town was nothing like Seoul, where shops and bars were open all night. Instead, the small shop he had walked past on his way to Jinyoung’s had closed, and there was not a hotel in sight. At least, he supposed, he would be safe sleeping out there at night, since he hadn’t seen anyone that looked particularly troublesome. He closed his eyes, sitting at the bus stop and rested his head on the glass behind him.

It wasn’t long before he found himself shivering from the cold, holding himself tighter as he tried to keep his warmth. Voices could be heard in the distance, laughing and shouting. It made him smile a little, even with his eyes closed, reminding him of Mark and Jackson and how the three of them sounded when they went out for the evening. The voices got louder but he ignored them, determined to at least get a little rest if nothing. By this point the sky was pitch black, the odd streetlight here and there indulging him in an eerie glow but otherwise dark, nothing but the sound of the waves and the voices that calmed him.

“No fucking way.” A familiar voice stated, disbelief dripping from his voice. Jaebum opened his eyes slightly, sitting upright when he saw Jinyoung standing in front of him.

He was with two other boys, both of them taller in height. One of them had bright yellow hair, and the other an ash grey, which seemed a little out of place for the calmness of the small village. But then what was Jaebum to know, having barely been there for a day.

“You know him?” The tan boy asked, Korean masked by a slight accent, showing straight away that he was foreign. Jinyoung scoffed.

“Unfortunately.” And then addressing Jaebum: “What the hell are you still doing here?”

“I missed the last bus.” Jaebum replied begrudgingly.

“Bus? Where are you headed?” The tallest boy asked.

“Seoul.”

“The next bus out doesn’t leave until tomorrow morning though.” He said.

“Hence the reason I’m sleeping out here,” Jaebum replied, although a little bitter.

“Don’t talk to him with that tone. It’s not his fault that you missed the last bus.”

“I know. I’m sorry.” Jaebum resigned.

“Hyung, he’s freezing.” The tan boy commented, noting the way he was shivering.

“Not my problem.” Jinyoung shrugged.

The tallest boy looked at him in disbelief.

“Are you serious Jinyoung? You’re literally the most caring person I know.”

“In case it wasn’t clear Yugyeom, I don’t like him.” Jinyoung sighed.

“Maybe not, but come on, he’s literally homeless. Why are you here?” The tan boy asked.

“Bambam!” Jinyoung seethed irritably.

“I came to see Jinyoung.” Jaebum replied calmly.

“Dude, he literally came here to see you. Get a grip and help him out.” Yugyeom commented.

“Aish, you brat!” Jinyoung shouted, throwing an arm up into the air to slap the taller boy. But he was quicker, grabbing Bambam with him and pulling him away, out of the radar of Jinyoung’s wrath.

“Bye hyung!” They called out gleefully, laughing as they both ran away hand in hand. Jaebum watched the entire interaction with eyebrows quirked in curiosity, a small smile tugging on the edges of his lips.

Jinyoung brought his eyes back to Jaebum’s, who seemed to be having some sort of inner turmoil. He looked like he either wanted to run away or sit with him, but wasn’t sure which. Eventually he scratched the back of his neck, and cleared his throat.

“Do you, um, want to stay the night at mine then? Since you have nowhere to go.” Jaebum’s eyes widened at his kindness.

“No, that’s okay Jinyoung. I don’t want to burden you any more than I have.” He answered honestly.

“It’s fine.” Jinyoung forced out through gritted teeth. “But I want you gone first thing in the morning.” He added, as an afterthought.

“I promise.” Jaebum said, teeth chattering as he bowed deeply at Jinyoung. The younger looked a bit conflicted at his actions, but chose not to comment, instead leading the way back down the beaten path.

—-

The two men walked side by side in silence. What did you say to someone you hated? Or rather, who hated you. Neither men were sure. When they got back to Jinyoung’s apartment, the two of them toed off their shoes in the hallway by the door, before heading to the small living room and combined kitchen. It was dimly lit inside, and there was a small fireplace in the corner.

“I’m home!” Jinyoung shouted out.

Jaebum felt a little reluctant to see Jinyoung’s mother; he could only imagine the pain he had put her through seeing her son so broken when he was younger.

“She must be sleeping.” Jinyoung told him when there was no reply, and Jaebum visibly relaxed. “You can warm up by the fire if you want.”

“Please don’t be nice to me.” Jaebum whispered.

“Why?” Jinyoung asked.

“It makes me like you more. And hate what I did to you,” Jaebum said, as he sat by the fire and warmed up. Jinyoung watched him carefully, before grabbing the blanket from the sofa and throwing it at Jaebum.

“Put that on. You’re still shivering.” Jaebum smiled softly.

“Thank you Jinyoungie.”

“Don’t call me that.” Jinyoung sighed, before coming to sit down beside Jaebum.

“Sorry.” Jaebum replied.

“It’s funny, I don’t remember you being this apologetic.” Jinyoung muttered. Jaebum stared at the side of his face for a while.

“I wish I had some sort of sob story to tell you, of why I was like that. But I don’t. Honestly I just got into the wrong crowd at the wrong time, and I thought the only way I could stay friends with them was if I did what they did. But I never-“ Jaebum’s voice shakes, and it makes Jinyoung look at him. He takes a deep breath and then starts again. “I never thought you would leave. After that night-“ Jinyoung flinches. “When they beat you, I tried to stop them. Please believe me when I say I did. But I can’t blame it all on them, maybe it was my fault too. I should have tried harder to stop them, instead of just letting it happen. But after you left, I cleaned up my act I swear. We got into a huge fight and they went to one high school and I made sure to go to another. I made friends with good people, Mark and Jackson, I don’t know if you remember them-“

“Mark. I remember him. He was always good to me.” Jinyoung smiled softly.

“Right. Well I joined them and we’ve been inseparable ever since. But it never really changed the guilt I felt. For the first six months after you left, I tried hard so find you. One time I even managed to get through to your old number, but your mother picked it up and told me never to bother you again. So I didn’t after that.”

“She never told me about that.”

“I don’t blame her. She was worried about you. I’m so happy that you found good friends here, Jinyoung.”

“Why are you telling me all of this?”

“I’m not sure. I guess it’s because my conscience still feels guilty after all this time, even just a bit.”

“No, but why are you here though? How did you find me?”

“The database.”

“What database?” And then a pause, before Jinyoung’s eyes widen a fraction. “Wait-“

“You’re my soulmate, Jinyoung.” Jaebum softly says, lifting up his sleeve to reveal the digits. He figured he might as well tell him as soon as possible, but it seemed like Jinyoung was smarter than he gave him credit for, having already seemed to figure everything out on his own.

“Those are my digits.” Jinyoung all but gasps.

“I’m aware.”

“But how- how did this happen?”

“I’m not sure.” Jaebum was just as confused as Jinyoung was, but at least he had had some time to process, unlike Jinyoung, who looked like he had just been thrown under a bus.

“I never wanted to see you again, and here you are, in my house, and now you’re telling me you’re my soulmate?”

“I know it sounds crazy, but Jinyoung, trust me when I tell you I promise not to force you to do anything. If you still want me to leave, I will. Just because we’re matched doesn’t mean we have to actually be together.” He reasoned.

“Do you want to be?”

“What?” Jaebum choked out.

“Would you want to be with me? Hypothetically speaking.”

“Well. I mean, I would at least like to have a relationship with my soulmate. Platonic or otherwise. But it’s entirely up to you.”

“So that’s why you’re here.”

“Yes. I couldn’t believe it when I saw that it was you. You’ve gotten so handsome Jinyoung.” The younger visibly blushed at this.

“I-thanks.”

Silence overcame them then, Jaebum gently lifting the blanket over Jinyoung’s shoulders. They were by no means friends now, not even close, but there was definitely an undeniable understanding between the two of them. They eventually fell asleep like that, both of them on the floor by the fire place, both plagued by their own dreams and memories.

—-

The morning came quicker than Jaebum realised it would, and the light filtered through his closed eyelids as he slowly opened them. Jinyoung was still asleep next to him, and at some point in the night he must have turned over to be facing Jaebum, so the older boy seized the opportunity to really look at Jinyoung this time, without the lines of anger etched on his face. He looked peaceful, and his age for once, face smooth of any wrinkles and hair messily displayed all across his head. Jaebum resisted the urge to run a hand through it.

“Stop looking at me,” his voice croaked, even though Jaebum was sure his eyes hadn’t opened once.

“Uh, I, um was just-“ Jaebum was flustered, but a soft smile spread across Jinyoung’s features as he finally opened his eyes.

“It’s fine, you creep.” Jinyoung replied.

“The first bus leaves in an hour, so I’ll be out of your hair then. Can I use your bathroom?”

“Sure. Down the hall to the left.” Jinyoung said, before turning back over and burying his face once again in the blanket.

Jaebum wondered idly if he would bump into Jinyoung’s mother. Jinyoung must have noticed his apprehension, speaking out.

“She’s not here. She left early this morning to see my sisters in Seoul. She’ll be gone the entire week.”

“I’m sorry if this isn’t my place to say, but...Jinyoung, did you leave Seoul without the rest of your family?” Jinyoung stared at Jaebum for a long minute after that, contemplating whether or not he should tell him.

“Yeah...my mother originally took me here because my grandmother lived here at the time, and she thought I would be safe. We were going to move back after some time, but I really liked it here and my mother felt closer to my grandmother, so we decided that it would be best for both of us to live here and then visit my sisters often. They’re both married now, by the way, so it’s not like they live alone or anything.” Jaebum hummed in response, before guiltily dragging himself to the bathroom to wash up.

When he emerged several minutes later, in fresh clothes that he had brought with him in his bag, he hovered awkwardly by the door of the apartment.

“Um. So I’ll be leaving now. Thank you, though, for everything, and sorry once again.” He mumbled.

“It’s okay. Do you want breakfast? You should have something to eat before that journey again.”

“That’s okay, you don’t have to bother with that.”

“Too late. I already made it whilst you were in the bathroom and it’s too much for me alone so you might as well stay for a bit longer.” Jaebum nodded slowly, sitting down at the table next to Jinyoung. The two men ate in relative silence, until Jaebum spoke up.

“Did you make this? It’s amazing, Jinyoung.”

“Oh, thanks. Yeah, I learnt to cook because my mother would be working when I came home from school.” He shrugged nonchalantly but Jaebum couldn’t help but feel a little guilty any time Jinyoung brought up something from his past.

“So I was thinking...” Jinyoung started, albeit a little more apprehensively than before. “Do you want to stay for the week?” Jaebum choked on his water.

“What?” He asked incredulously.

“Calm down. It’s not like we’re friends or anything. But I’m just thinking, since you are my soulmate and all, whether you would want to stay for a bit. Just so we can at least see why we’ve been matched. The soulmate code is rarely wrong, you know.”

“I-yeah. Jinyoung, Yeah. I would love to stay, if it’s not too much trouble.”

“It’s fine. But first order of business, stop treading around me like you’re afraid I’m going to break. I’m not the fragile Jinyoung you once knew. I’m stronger now, if anything. So just treat me like you would treat any one of your friends.”

“Okay,” Jaebum agreed.

“Great!” Jinyoung clapped gleefully. “So tell me something about yourself.”

Jinyoung causally leaned forwards on the table.

“Uhh, Okay. Well first of all I am a freelance photographer.” Jaebum offered.

“Wow, really? I never would have guessed that.” Jinyoung said, eyes wide. “Can I see some of your work?” He asked.

“Yeah, I got into photography in high school, and ended up doing my degree I’m fine arts but majoring in photography.” He got his phone out, logging onto a blog page and handed to Jinyoung, as he shifted through hundreds of photos.

“Wow, some of these are really good,” Jinyoung chimed.

“Some?” Jaebum teased, and Jinyoung’s lips twitched up into a smile.

“Okay fine. All of them are good, but some are better than others,” he amended, continuing to look through them with interest.

“You’ve shot for vogue?!” He all but screamed out after a minute of silence, when he came across the cover page shoot Jaebum had done.

“Yeah. That was an amazing experience,” Jaebum recalled, a little starry eyed. He shifted his focus back on Jinyoung.

“What about you? What do you do?”

“I am an elementary school teacher. I love my job. The kids are so sweet.” Jinyoung gushed, and Jaebum resisted the urge to take a picture of him.

“I like it when you smile.” He said suddenly.

“What?”

“When you smile. It makes you look pretty.”

“Uh, thanks, I guess.” Jinyoung replied uneasily.

The two of them finished breakfast in silence after that, Jaebum offering to wash the dishes as Jinyoung dried them.

“So I have to go to work later, but you’re more than welcome to come along with me, if you want. You can sit at the back of the class and look pretty or something.”

“You think I’m pretty?” Jaebum smirked. Jinyoung blinked a couple of times.

“That’s not what I said,” He pouted.

“Sure.” Jaebum laughed.

—-

It turned out that Park Jinyoung was very, very good at his job. It also turned out that Jinyoung was incredibly popular in the small town, being stopped several times when they were on the way to the school by younger and older people alike. Jinyoung was also incredibly polite, and stopped to talk to all of them, offering to carry groceries for elders and dropping to his knees for little kids to engulf them in big hugs. Jaebum almost envied him, the stark contrast to the loneliness of Seoul. When they eventually got to the school, Jinyoung pulled up a chair at the back of the classroom for Jaebum, before going back to the front and letting all the kids in. The cute six year olds spilled into the classroom, excited chatter and calls of “Jinyoung hyung!” heard throughout as some of the kids circled the younger man for hugs.

“Hey kids! Today we have a special guest, everyone say hello to Jaebum hyung!” The kids rang out in choruses of “hello Jaebum hyung!” but Jaebum struggled to hear any of that over the beating of his heart at hearing Jinyoung call him hyung. He knew it was for the sake of the kids, but still, they were on the right track.

“Jaebum hyung is an artist, aren’t you?” Jinyoung said loudly for the kids, and Jaebum nodded with glee, picking up on of the kids that came up to him. “That’s Youngjae, he’s a little ray of sunshine.”

The little boy smiled at that, a big toothy grin that made Jaebum’s heart swell.

“Hey Youngjae,” he smiled at the boy.

“I want to be an artist too! Just like Jaebummie hyung! I want to be a singer!”

“Really? Wow, Youngjae, that’s amazing.” Jaebum smiled.

After that Jinyoung managed to get all the children’s attention back on the front of the classroom, declaring today as an art day since he “might as well put Jaebum hyung to good use”, so all the children got out the glue and paints and began painting their masterpieces. Jaebum joined in on the fun, having left his camera in Seoul anyways and not having picked up a paintbrush in a year or so, delicately blending his colours together on the page whilst the kids around him scribbled messily onto theirs.

Jinyoung came around every once in a while, watching over the kids and their paintings, stopping to see who was painting what. He looked over at Jaebum’s painting, who, despite being very uncomfortable with his long legs tucked under the tiny table, was drawing a masterpiece, at least in Jinyoung’s eyes. He seemed to be using his phone as a point of reference, and Jinyoung soon realised he was painting the view of the sea from the window of one of the shops that lined the street.

Once the children were done with their paintings, Jinyoung declared it break time, and began to clean up once all the kids were outside. Jaebum helped, the two of them working in relative silence but one that wasn’t awkward at all, whilst Jaebum hummed an old R&B tune under his breath.

“You’re very good,” Jinyoung noted.

“Hmm?” Jaebum asked.

“Your painting. I saw it before. You’re really good.”

“Oh thank you! I took that picture yesterday, before I came to see you.” Jinyoung hummed contently.

After finishing up for the day with the kids and promising them that he would come back soon, Jaebum and Jinyoung walked in companiable silence to a small cafe. The place was buzzing with people, and Jaebum found it oddly endearing; a sharp contrast to the relatively small and quiet streets.

The two men grabbed a small table by the window, the sunlight filtering through the windows and casting them in a soft hazy glow. Jaebum couldn’t help but take a picture of Jinyoung, looking angelic in a soft white knit sweater as the sun beams danced gracefully off the side of the his face.

“Did you just take a picture of me?” He asked the older incredulously.

“Oh, yeah. I can delete it if you want, but you just looked too etherial for me not to take one,” Jinyoung’s cheeks were dusted with a barely noticeable rosy blush at those words, and he reached over the table to see the picture. He laughed a little.

“Wow. You actually make me look photogenic,” he noted.

“Not like I had to try hard. I know I’ve said this before, but you are very very handsome, Jinyoung-ah.” Jinyoung visibly tensed under be nickname, but didn’t say much of it.

Soon after, a woman who must have been in her late fifties came bustling around to their table, sweeping up Jinyoung in a side hug.

“Jinyoung! Its been a while since we last saw you here, how’s work?”

“It’s good! The kids are little angels, but they keep me busy a lot.”

“I bet. Them and those two friends of yours. Last time them two came in here they were laughing so loud some of the customers got scared!” She smiled fondly.

“Yeah. They can be a little extra.” Jinyoung laughed.

“But who’s this? I’ve never seen your face around town!” She smiled at Jaebum, who returned her warmth.

“Oh this is a friend of mine...from Seoul.” Jinyoung added, hesitantly.

“Wow, Jinyoung, you never told me your friends back in Seoul we’re so handsome. What’s your name, hun?”

“Jaebum. It’s nice to meet you ma’am.” Jaebum smiled, bowing deeply.

“Oh and so polite too! It’s alright dear, Jinyoung here is basically like my second son.” Jinyoung smiled up happily at her.

“What can I get you both?” She asked.

“What’s good?” Jaebum asked.

“Oh everything.” Jinyoung interjected. “We’ll get two of the specials please.”

“Coming right up.” She smiled once more, leaving the two boys in a flurry of her colourful apron.

“She’s nice,” Jaebum mentioned once she had left.

“Mm. She’s my mother’s friend, basically my aunty though.”

“That’s sweet.” Jaebum hummed contently. The two men sat in relative silence after that, both focused on their food and their own thoughts. It wasn’t uncomfortable though, and Jaebum found he enjoyed spending time with Jinyoung, even when it was just to do nothing. There was something inherently calming about the other man, and Jaebum found himself engaged with a tender curiosity, not quite love, but something that made him interested in the other man in a way that made his heart pound uncontrollably in his chest.

“Thank you for taking me to your favourite places Jinyoung. Actually, scratch that, thank you for being kind to me at all. I don’t deserve it, I know I don’t, but just- I’m glad we could do this. Spend time together.” He trailed off when he watched Jinyoung’s expression change, a certain softness spreading over his features.

“I know you tried to stop them. That night...when they beat me.” he looked to the floor for a moment, at his most vulnerable before looking up once again, a newfound determination in his eyes. “I remember, actually. I remember you screaming, and trying to pull them off. I also remember that you never actually did any of the stuff they did, but because you went along with it, until the last time, I pinned you as a bad guy too. And I guess you were too, but what I’m trying to say is I don’t hate you as much as I hate them.”

It was a little fraction of truth in Jinyoung’s words, and although they still had a long and hard path ahead of them, Jaebum treasured those words, pulling Jinyoung into a tight hug, feeling more complete than he had in years.

—-

It was late in the evening now. Where Jaebum would usually spend evenings alone, editing pictures or reading (and on the odd occasion being dragged out of his apartment by Mark and Jackson), he felt oddly content. Both him and Jinyoung were lying on the sofas, that were adjacent to one another, reading quietly. It was intriguing that someone else liked to read as much as he did; he often got called an old grandpa by Mark and Jackson due to his habits.

Jaebum re-read the same line he had for the third time, finding it hard to focus when he could clearly hear the steady rhythm of Jinyoung breathing in and out. He tapped on Jinyoung’s shoulder, passing his book over to him and Jinyoung hastily folded over the page in his book and exchanged his book for the other.

“What else do you like to do in your spare time?” Jinyoung asked, after a while. “I think I have some old games and stuff around, we could attempt one of the many puzzles my grandmother gave me, that I’ve yet to complete.” Jaebum nodded his head, and Jinyoung shuffled out of the room, returning once again with the jigsaw puzzle.

“And to answer your question, I like to compose and write music in my spare time,” Jaebum confessed.

“Really?” Jinyoung’s eyes were wide with interest. “Can you sing me something?”

Jaebum awkwardly scratched the back of his neck.

“That’s a bit embarrassing, don’t you think?” He cringed.

“Oh come on hyung, it will be fun!” He supposed Jinyoung hadn’t meant to say that by the way he quickly came to cover his mouth with his hand, but Jaebum couldn’t help the small smile that graced his features. He was going soft, that was for sure, because he wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to say no to Jinyoung. He tried to convince himself that it was just a soulmate thing, but a smaller part of Jaebum chastised him for being so stupid, for denying the obvious attraction he felt for the younger man. Had Jackson been here he would have confirmed that Jaebum was well and truly whipped. But for now, he shoved those feelings away in the deepest corners of his mind and adorned the younger man by singing a few lines.

“Every time I dream and wake up, I feel your empty spot, Why was I so cruel back then? Regrets keep increasing day by day...” Jaebum trailed off after a few lines, a deep red gracing his features. “It’s um, not complete yet, but yeah, that’s what it is at the moment.”

“Wow that’s amazing.” Jinyoung looked a little starry eyed. “Can I help you finish it?” Jaebum looked a little shocked at the request, but soon enough smoothed out his features and nodded. So that’s what the two of them spent their evening doing, writing and composing together, bouncing ideas off one another in surprising harmony.

Jaebum discovered that Jinyoung was incredibly poetic (he assumed from the large number of books the boy had lining the shelves), but also that he was creative and smart, and the two of them found themselves completing the song in just a few hours.

“I’m expecting to hear that on Soundcloud or something,” Jinyoung joked.

“Sing it with me.” Jaebum bluntly requested, Jinyoung blanching a little.

“No that’s okay. You sing it, your voice is amazing.”

“So is yours,” Jaebum retaliated. “It will be fun! Come on Jinyoung, sing it with me, it’s not like anyone’s going to see it anyway. It’s not my song anymore, it’s ours.”

Jinyoung sighed but agreed anyway; he doesn’t think he’s seen Jaebum he this passionate about anything since he had arrived on his doorstep the day prior, and who is he to steal his happiness?

If the stars had aligned to bring these two back together, Im Jaebum was determined for Park Jinyoung to see the real him, the one he is now, ambitious and determined and creative and opinionated, who cares for his friends and family, and not the boy he was ten years ago. And maybe it was the way fate had worked itself out, but in that moment he felt himself leaning closer and closer to Jinyoung, the younger boy frozen in place until there was only a slither of space between the two of them, cross legged on the floor, knees touching.

“What are you doing?” Jinyoung whispered, soft breath flying over Jaebum’s face.

“Tell me to stop and I will,” Jaebum said, voice low. He could feel the way Jinyoung’s heart must have been beating as fast as his was, by the quick rise and fall of his chest. Jaebum waited, a minute or two where it seemed Jinyoung was weighing up his options, but nothing was said, no words exchanged. Just when it seemed like Jinyoung might just lean forward too and close the gap the front door opened, the two of them jumping apart.

“Eomma!” Jinyoung jumped up to his feet, glancing back nervously at Jaebum.
“What are you doing back so soon? I though you were going for the week.” He asked, Jaebum still sat on the floor, back leaning against the sofa, unnoticed for now.

“I was, but there was an emergency at work, so they needed me back straight away. Can you believe my boss managed to fall down the stairs? Fractured her arm and her leg? I need to make sure everything is in order whilst she’s in the hospital-“ She stopped mid-sentence, seeing Jaebum on the floor. “Oh! I didn’t realise- Jinyoung, who’s this?” Before Jaebum could introduce himself, Jinyoung quickly interrupted.

“Oh that’s JB! Yeah, JB. He’s, uh, I met him at a teacher training event a couple of months ago. He teaches arts. But he was in town, so I offered him a place to stay here.” Another thing for Jaebum to note, Park Jinyoung was an incredible liar.

“JB. That’s an interesting name. Where do you teach?” Jaebum cleared his throat, observing Jinyoung’s pleading eyes.

“Uhh, Yeah. It’s a nickname I had when I was younger and it stuck, I guess.” He lied, he had never been called that in his life. “Uh, I work in Seoul.” He stated.

“Oh, Seoul! We used to live there.” His mother smiled fondly, albeit a little sadly. Jinyoung looked at the floor. “Anyways! I’m sure you boys have lots of catching up to do, so I’ll leave you to it. I’m exhausted after that journey anyway, so I’m heading to bed. Jinyoung, make sure to make our guest welcome. You can stay for as long as you like.” She said, speaking to Jaebum.

“Thank you,” He murmured, bowing deeply. She smiled once more before entering her room for the night, shutting the door behind her.

“JB?” Jaebum asked as soon as she was out of earshot, laughing a little.

“Shhh! It’s the first thing I could think of! I can’t call you Jaebum because my mum remembers your name, and it’s not that hard to put two and two together. She would kick you out quicker than you could plead your case. And anyways, I think JB is a sexy name, much better than Jaebum or whatever you’re real name is,” Jinyoung joked.

“JB it is then,” Jaebum smirked.

“Let’s go into my room.” Jinyoung mentioned after a moment of awkward silence.

“Careful. Don’t tempt me,” Jaebum joked back, pleased when the tips of Jinyoung’s ears turned red.

“Not like that! Just because she can still here you out here.” He said quietly, before leading the way down the hall. Jaebum followed him to the last door of the small hallway, before entering.

If Jaebum had already been intrigued by Park Jinyoung, his room was no different, a small snapshot of his life. Jaebum found himself absently admiring the shelves of books and the small board of pictures of him and friends, laughing and smiling. Jaebum idly wondered what it would be like to be the cause of a smile that big, wondered if he and Jinyoung would have been soulmates in another life.

“Um.” Jinyoung breaks his trance, and he sheepishly moves his hand away from where he has been absently tracing Jinyoung’s pictures.

“Sorry.” Jaebum smiled softly, sitting down on the corner of his bed and maintaining a safe distance.

“It’s getting late, but you can sleep here tonight if you want. The sofa is very uncomfortable, trust me, Bambam and Yugyeom complain so much about it the three of us end up sleeping in the same bed.” He smiles fondly at that, and Jaebum can’t help but be thankful that Jinyoung has such good friends.

“Okay,” he agrees.

“But no funny business! Keep on your side.” Jinyoung warns, slipping into the bathroom and emerging a couple of minutes later in a soft long sleeve top and checked pyjama pants. Jaebum smiles a little at seeing Jinyoung look so soft, before going to change into his own, a slight contrast in a tank top that shows of his biceps and loose shorts down to his knees. When he re-enters the room it’s already dark, and Jinyoung is peacefully sleeping on his side, so Jaebum sleepily climbs into the other side, falling asleep almost immediately.

—-

That night Jinyoung dreams. It had been a long time since he had any kind of nightmare, but this night he does. Not of anything particularly memorable; he doesn’t even remember what it was about in the morning, but he awakes in the middle of night, drenched in sweat and heart beating at a million miles a minute.

A hand comes to rest on the small of his back, and he jumps again, forgetting he is not alone like he usually is.

“Jinyoungie,” Jaebum says, voice low and raspy with sleep, and Jinyoung prays he can’t hear his heart beating because there’s no way it’s going to calm down with Jaebum’s voice sounding like that.

Jinyoung idly wonders when his feelings for the older man had changed, from absolutely despising his existence to feeling okay with him staying at his house, and now in his bed. He had almost let him kiss him yesterday. But Jinyoung remains reserved, worried that this is all a prank that will back fire on him.

Nonetheless when warm arms circle his waist and pull him closer to Jaebum’s sleeping body, he doesn’t restrain, and almost melts into Jaebum’s sleeping form, head placed against his chest as his heartbeat starts to slow down. It isn’t perfect, but it’s okay, and for now, Jinyoung thinks that might be enough.

—-

The next day Jinyoung gets up early, partially because he wants to avoid the awkwardness of waking up still wrapped in Jaebum’s arms, and also because he has work early today. He quickly scribbled a note down on a scrap piece of paper, and leaves it on the desk, hoping Jaebum sees it when he awakes.

Jaebum,
Out for work. Entertain yourself today. :)
Jinyoung

Jaebum pouts slightly when he wakes up to see the note. He shouldn’t be surprised really and he likes the fact that Jinyoung is just as dedicated to his job as he is, but he had somehow wanted to spend more time with the younger.

Realising he had only brought enough clothes for two days, he digs around in Jinyoung’s wardrobe for a clean t-shirt. What he soon discovers is that Jinyoung and he definitely have very different tastes in fashion, but he manages to find a simple button down, one which must be oversized on Jinyoung since it fits him perfectly. He wears his black ripped skinny jeans again with it and throws his jacket over the top, satisfied. When cleaning up the mess he created searching for clothes, he blushes furiously having found some of Jinyoung’s underwear, but quickly puts everything back to the way he found it in an attempt to not infuriate the younger.

When he steps out into the kitchen determined to pour himself a bowl of cereal before spending the rest of the day outside to avoid Jinyoung’s mother, he finds she is already sat in the kitchen, eating her own breakfast as she browses absentmindedly through her phone.

“Good morning, ma’am.” Jaebum bows.

“Ah, JB! Did you sleep well?” She asks, smiling at him.

“Yeah,” He smiles at her, before pouring himself some cereal. The kitchen is somewhat quiet for a while but Jaebum finds he doesn’t really mind.

“Normally Jinyoung doesn’t invite friends over apart from Bambam and Yugyeom, who are basically like family by this point. You two must be close then right? It’s just funny because he’s never mentioned a JB to me before,” Jaebum stares into his bowl.

“Mmm.” Jaebum just hummed, making sure to not say anything incriminating.

“Are you and Jinyoung dating or something?” She asked. “It’s okay, you can tell me. I know Jinyoung got his soulmate digits a while ago.” She smiled fondly.

“He already got his digits?” Jaebum asked, confused.

“Oh, Yeah. He didn’t tell you?” She asks, her face etched with concern. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to tell you that, I thought Jinyoung would have already said-“

“No it’s okay, don’t worry.” Jaebum smiled reassuringly at her, although it didn’t quiet reach his eyes. If Jinyoung had got his soulmate code already, why hadn’t he told Jaebum? And why had he acted surprised to see him? Jaebum wondered idly if their soulmate digits didn’t match; it was very rare and unlikely that the person you were matched with was matched with someone else, but it could still happen.

He excuses himself from the kitchen, grabbing his backpack on the way out and set off towards the sea. The wind whipped viciously at him but he felt numb to it all, sitting on the sand with his jeans rolled up to his ankles as he watched the waves tirelessly, the world sinking away as he sat there to mull over his thoughts. How long he had been sitting there for he wasn’t sure, but he watched the sky change from a limitless blue hue to one masked with rays of pink and orange. He hears footsteps behind him but thinks nothing of it, until Jinyoung is sitting next to him, side by side in the quiet.

“You didn’t tell me.” Jaebum speaks up after about 20 minutes of them siting wordlessly.

“I know.” Jinyoung sighed; clearly his mother had already told him what had happened.

“Why?” Jaebum asked.

“Because I don’t believe in soulmates. So I didn’t bother to check mine in the database. That’s why I was shocked when I saw you at my door.” Jinyoung looked down at the sand, absently running his fingers through it.

“It still hurts me that when I told you about mine you didn’t say anything to me about yours.” Jinyoung looked at him then, confused and angry.

“What does it matter? It’s not like it’s going to change anything, Jaebum.”

“It changes everything!” Jaebum shouted, as Jinyoung slouched back. “I don’t know why I feel this way about you Jinyoung but I do. I want to know what I’m doing here; if there’s no chance for us, then tell me now and I’ll be gone in the morning.” Jinyoung now just looked guilty more than anything.

“I’m sorry, I just. I wanted some time, to process. To think. But actually I’ve liked having you around, and I like it when people ask me about you.” That caught Jaebum’s attention, and he looked up at Jinyoung.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Really.” Jaebum stared at Jinyoung’s face for a couple of seconds, trying to see if there was any hesitation in his words, any lie, but all he saw was pure truth.

“Yesterday. Before my mother came home...” Jinyoung trailed off, fingertips tracing patterns in the sand. “You were about to do something. I was wondering if...if you would want to try again?” A rosy blush tinted his cheeks as he looked down again, but Jaebum found himself smiling at his request, leaning in until there was a fraction of space between them.

“I’m not sure what it was. You’ll have to remind me,” he said lowly, and that’s all it takes for Jinyoung to close the small gap between them and press his lips to the other.

The kiss was soft, chaste even, at first, but then Jaebum was cupping Jinyoung’s cheeks with his hands delicately, opening the other man up as he licked his bottom lip for entrance, Jinyoung obliging easily. Jinyoung grabbed Jaebum’s hair, threading his fingers easily through his dark locks, and pulled a little, making the other man’s breath hitch as he continued his relentless pace on his lips. Jinyoung found himself being easily pushed down into the sand, Jaebum towering over him as he moved down to kiss Jinyoung’s neck, causing the younger to man to breathlessly shiver every time he hit a soft spot. How long they stayed like that, in the sand just kissing, neither of them knew, but the Jinyoung and Jaebum that finally left the cold beach at 11pm, laughing like little kids hand in hand were not the same two men that had arrived.

And later, when in Jinyoung’s bedroom as Jaebum blow dries his hair for him after having a shower, speaking quietly and casually about everything and anything, short and small kisses exchanged in between tasks was something neither of them would have imagined. Jinyoung, upon later discovering that Jaebum was indeed wearing his shirt (which pleased him, not that he would tell) smirked happily, innocently telling off Jaebum for taking his clothes without his permission.

And finally, when they were only illuminated by the small bed side light, laying side by side, Jinyoung showed Jaebum his digits, which were a perfect match to his, and Jaebum softly kissed each one, mesmerised by the small goosebumps that awakened on Jinyoung’s arms as he did so.

—-

The following morning Jinyoung takes Jaebum on a road trip. They pack into the beaten red pick up truck Jinyoung borrows from a family friend sometimes, and set out on the road, with nothing but the cool air and clear road in front of them. Jinyoung takes him to an even more remote part of town than the the one he lives in, where the truck comes to a stop on an open field, the cool and dewy grass a welcome feeling under the soles of his feet.

It doesn’t take much from there for the two of them to simply bask in the company or the other, talking hours endlessly about Jaebum’s life in Seoul and Jinyoung life here, and how they’re so different to how they once were but similar at the same time, where everything yet nothing has changed, except perhaps the feelings each one has for the other, which had been so dangerously tipped at hate but now seemed to be tipping the other way, to an emotion Jinyoung found much scarier than hate but no less passionate, consumed in a haze of whether to run whilst he still could or let himself fall for the other, slowly, slowly, until he would be the first and last thing he thought of.

And Jinyoung found himself tethering towards the latter, finding he didn’t really mind when he found Jaebum in his bed every morning, that he didn’t mind warm hands wrapping around his body late at night, that he didn’t mind the domesticity of coming home to Jaebum and leaving him in the morning. In fact, Jinyoung would even admit, once Bambam and Yugyeom pried it out of him, that he actually liked Jaebum, not just for the familiarity of a life of what could have been, but for Jaebum himself, for his stupid eye moles that Jinyoung would find himself staring at for too long, for his chic and sexy demeanour, which actually hid the biggest dork underneath it, and the way he laughed out loud when he found something funny, unlike Jinyoung who hid his smile with his hand, an unconscious habit, although Jinyoung found himself doing less and less with Jaebum around.

If someone had come into Jinyoung’s life a week prior, warning him of Jaebum and the feelings he would develop for him in such a short time he would have laughed. He didn’t believe in soulmates at all, he didn’t think there could ever be one person that would complete him like that, but here he was, falling head over heels in love with Im Jaebum, and Jinyoung was beginning to wonder whether soulmates really did exist.

But as with all things in Park Jinyoung’s life, his epiphany of emotion comes to an abrupt stop when he arrives back home with Jaebum that evening.

“I want him out.” Jinyoung’s mother says as soon as the two boys walk through the door, laughing about something. The smiles on their faces fall as they watch Jinyoung’s mother, sat on the sofa rigidly, Jaebum’s bag messily shoved with his clothes and other belongings.

“What?” Jinyoung asks, brain beginning to click back into motion. Jinyoung’s mother holds up the note he had left for Jaebum yesterday morning, the one where he had written his real name. He realised it had stayed on his table, and he had forgotten to bin it. His face pales of any colour.

“The funny thing was that I knew he looked so painfully familiar. I even tried to get out his relationship to you but he didn’t say anything. I just didn’t think that he would be the same boy that bullied you senseless for years! Jinyoung, what the hell is he doing in my house? Why would you let that monster back into your life?” She was furious now, tears on the brink of spilling. Jaebum felt his stomach drop. He never realised the impact that his actions would have had on Jinyoung’s mother. He bowed deeply at her.

“I am so sorry. Truly, I am. Please don’t blame Jinyoung, this isn’t his fault. I came to apologise for my actions.” Jaebum mustered up, sincerely.

“Mother, it was ten years ago, just leave it in the past now.” Jinyoung pleaded.

“Maybe I would, if we had stayed in Seoul. But Jinyoung, we changed our entire lives for someone who didn’t even care about us!” She was shouting now, and Jinyoung slouched back. Jaebum felt physically sick.

“She’s right, Jinyoungie. I caused you both nothing but misery. I’m sorry. I promise to leave, and never come back.” He said, speaking to Jinyoung’s mother now.

“What?” Jinyoung was livid now. “Don’t I mean anything to you? How could you just leave? After everything? I let you come back into my life Jaebum, but you should fight to stay there!” Jinyoung shouted.
Jaebum flinched at his words.

“Jinyoung, I’m sorry. But I can’t let this man stay in our house anymore. He needs to leave.” Jinyoung’s mother handed Jaebum his bag, a thick silence filling the air.

Jaebum looked at Jinyoung one last time; the other man was staring at the floor, hands in fists at his side and tears threatening to brim the surface. Jaebum’s jaw tensed as he slowly walked to the door; he wanted Jinyoung to scream, tell him he was a coward, but all he was met with was stark silence. Even the way the door clicked after him filled the deafening silence with a finality, a closure: a goodbye.

—-

Jaebum’s apartment in Seoul felt lonelier than usual. Even though Mark and Jackson had come over straight away upon hearing Jaebum was back in town, it didn’t feel the same. Jaebum found himself staring out of his windows, tiny ants of people in the city below, illuminated by the light of the shops and cars, clustered.

But up on top, looking down, he felt alone.

Everyone seemed to have someone, apart from him. He had considered going back on the database to find Jinyoung’s number, and he actually had, but all his texts had remained unsaid. What was he supposed to say exactly? He knew he couldn’t go against Jinyoung’s mother’s wishes by contacting Jinyoung, but he couldn’t help but feel so lonely. It was true when they said that once you met your soulmate, you couldn’t feel complete without them. Jaebum usually believed that to be a lie, but in the dark night, when he slept alone and his heart would physically ache, he wondered if it could be true. He knew it was. He thought about Jinyoung often, thought about what he was doing, if he was out with his friends, if he was lonely like Jaebum was. He wondered if Jinyoung thought about him too.

A month had passed, and Jaebum felt no better. He busied himself with work, taking on more schedules than he probably should, and when we was free, he was often around Mark and Jackson’s house, just like before. Except now, instead of going home after like he used to, he would make up any excuse to stay the night over on their sofa, just to not feel so alone. The two men looked at him with concern, but let him nonetheless.

It was on a rare night that Jaebum was actually home, reading a book he had seen in Jinyoung’s house, when the door knocked, loud and obnoxious. He ignored it, assuming whoever it was would just go away, or if it was Mark or Jackson, would barge in anyway, but the knocking didn’t stop. He begrudgingly put his book down, in the middle of a particularly good part, and walked open to the door, yanking it open. What he didn’t expect on the other side was to see Jinyoung, drenched from the rain outside, panting heavily like he had run a marathon.

“Jinyoung?!” Jaebum gaped. “Did you run here?” He asked, shocked. Jinyoung nodded.

“All the way from the station. I needed to see you.”

“I-“

But Jaebum’s words were cut off, as Jinyoung lunged forward and found Jaebum’s lips, all tongue and teeth, painful but welcomed, Jaebum quickly responding to his quick pace and moving his lips in time, hands fisting at the material of Jinyoung’s shirt as if this is all a dream, and he’s afraid Jinyoung will disappear as quickly as he has arrived.

The two men fall back easily onto the sofa behind them, all want and need possessing them.

“I-fuck, missed you so much.” Jaebum gasped.

“Why didn’t you come back for me?” Jinyoung asked, kissing Jaebum’s lips in between every word.

“Because,” Jaebum said, holding Jinyoung’s hands in his own so they could talk properly. “I couldn’t disobey your mother. I put you both through so much pain, if I didn’t listen to her now she would probably kill me.” Jinyoung laughed a little. “But what are you doing here?” He asked, eyes searching Jinyoung’s.

“I pleaded with my mother. I explained to her that we were soulmates, which, by the way, she was pissed about, but she eventually understood that it was best for us to be together. She said she would suck up her own hatred for you if it made her son happy.”

“Are you?”

“Am I what?”

“Happy. With me, I mean.” Jinyoung was quiet for a moment, considering his words before speaking.

“Well, I would say I felt the most complete I had since getting my digits when you were there with me. And I definitely felt very lonely after you left. But most importantly, I actually enjoyed the time we spent together, and I would like to spend more time together. With you. If you want.”

Jaebum smiled, one that reached his eyes. Even though it wasn’t the confession he had always hoped for (Jaebum blamed that on the countless novels he read), it was still something better than nothing; Jaebum cherished the words with both hands, placing soft kisses wherever he could find a spot, all over Jinyoung’s face and neck. He was overcome with a rush of affection for the younger, he almost felt giddy with excitement. Or was that love? Jaebum wasn’t so sure.

“I would love to spend more time with you Jinyoung-ah. Preferably, the rest of our lives.” Jinyoung blushed at this, burning his face in Jaebum’s shoulder.

“Hyunggg,” he whined, and Jaebum had to physically bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from cooing at his cuteness. “You’re so cheesy.” He continued.

“Hmm.” Jaebum agreed. “Only for you though,” he added as an afterthought.

The kissing started up again soon after that, almost as if they were trying to make up for lost time, except this time, with the promise of forever. Jaebum showed Jinyoung in every way he could physically how much he loved the younger, and Jinyoung shivered under every touch, fingertips grazing the bare of Jaebum’s broad back in a reminder that this was very much real, and not some sort of fantasy.

It took a couple of days for Jinyoung and Jaebum to smooth out the details of their relationship and how they were going to make it work long distance, and the two of them took it in turns to travel to the other most weekends when they got the chance. Jaebum used the opportunity when Jinyoung was in Seoul to show him off to his friends and strangers alike, holding Jinyoung’s hand anytime they walked together, fingers intertwined like they permanently belonged like that.

Jinyoung became re-acquainted with Jackson and Mark, to whom Mark and Jinyoung built a very strong relationship (one at times Jaebum felt a little insecure of, but whenever he told Jinyoung this the younger would just laugh and tell him his heart only had space for one hyung which was him, and reminded him of the fact that Jackson and Mark were hopelessly in love).

Jinyoung introduced Jaebum proudly as his boyfriend and soulmate to all his friends around his own town, and although he had been apprehensive to go back at first, Jaebum managed to convince Jinyoung’s mother to put their differences behind them and let Jinyoung and him be together, with the promise of never hurting Jinyoung again. Jaebum vowed to keep this promise, and probably took the words much more seriously that Jinyoung ever intended, always ensuring the other man was as happy as he was.

Eventually there came a time where Jaebum and Jinyoung couldn’t bare to do the long distance thing anymore, and Jaebum asked Jinyoung to move in with him, a year into their relationship. The two men were lying on the grass in the dark, stargazing in Jinyoung’s town since trying to do this in Seoul would be near impossible, when Jaebum asked the question.

“Jinyoungie?” He began, tentatively.

“Hmm?” The younger replied.

“I was wondering...would you want to move in with me? You can say no if you want, but I just feel like seeing you every weekend isn’t enough, and I want to see you everyday, beside me, together. There are plenty of schools in Seoul too so maybe you could teach at one of those-“

Jinyoung had shut Jaebum up from rambling with a kiss, and after a minute, eyes all watery, he had told Jaebum yes a million times and how he couldn’t believe it had taken the other this long to ask him, the stars in the sky long forgotten as all Jaebum could focus on was Jinyoung’s lips, Jinyoung’s leg between his, the weight of Jinyoung on his body, and the way Jinyoung’s eyes shined brighter than any star ever could.

—-

Jaebum and Jinyoung move in together a month after that night, and Jinyoung’s mother also moves back to Seoul, to resume the life she had once had.

Jaebum finds it easy enough to find space for all of Jinyoung’s things, apart from his books, which combined with Jaebum’s, equal a huge amount. Still, the two men make it work, and Jinyoung’s books almost never stay on the shelf anyway, always picked up and lying somewhere around the apartment, sometimes with a pencil in the middle where Jinyoung was underlining a particularly good quote, or left half finished, the edges of the page folded over to mark his place.

Jinyoung returns to his town often to meet Bambam and Yugyeom, although the both of them end moving to Seoul after Bambam is spotted by some company for having killer fashion and was soon recruited as a model, his face plastered all over billboards around Seoul, a fact that will never not make Jinyoung laugh and tease the younger, even though he is secretly very proud of him. Jaebum also becomes very good friends with Bambam and Yugyeom, and together with Jinyoung plots to get the two men together, because according to Jaebum, they are so hopelessly in love but just can’t see it.
Although it seems the departure of Jinyoung seems to drive the two men even closer than before, what with both of them living together.

When Bambam told Yugyeom he might have to move to Seoul for work, Yugyeom told him he would move with him, enrolling himself in a prestigious dance school (although Jinyoung suspects he also couldn’t bare the thought of living his life without Bambam in it). The two youngest declare themselves a couple a few months after moving to Seoul, and are inseparable after that (not that they were ever separable before that anyway). Although neither of them have got their soul digits yet, Jinyoung can’t think of anyone more perfect for the other.

Mark and Jackson tell the others about their engagement on a night when the six of them are hanging out at Jaebum and Jinyoung’s apartment, to which they are met with huge celebrations from the others. The wedding takes place two months later, just a simple ceremony but Jinyoung swears he has never seen two people cry from happiness so much in his life, and even catches Jaebum shedding a tear or two when the two men share their vows.

For now, Jaebum and Jinyoung are at peace, both with their past and their future, not knowing what it may hold but knowing that as long as they are together, it won’t matter. Jinyoung didn’t believe in soulmates for most of his life, but after meeting Jaebum, that all changed. Jinyoung now believes in fate for having a funny way of working everything out in the end, and as he looks over at Jaebum’s peaceful sleeping body next to him, he thinks that if this is what life has in store for him, he would be perfectly content, forever.