Chapter Text
Names:
Texting:
Richie: what the fuck richard
Stan: stan the man
Ben: soft boy 3000
Mike: blake shelton
Bev: beverly breaks bad
Eddie: YOU BEtteR STop
Bill: big bill
Snapchat:
Richie: xxHot_Boyxx
Stan: StanleyUris
Ben: ILoveCats20
Mike: Isthatabee
Bev: Beverly1945
Eddie: angry.asthmatic
Bill: stutter_god
GCs:
The losers club: Texting probably whats up cause art imitates life
Please stop with the photos: snapchat
Two gays sitting in a groupchat: BEING gay (snapchat)
The wosews cwub: complaining
4 am-
xxHot_Boyxx is typing...
xxHot_Boyxx: hey what r u wearing
angry.asthmatic: what the fuck
xxHot_Boyxx: um wrong number is this mrs k??
angry.asthmatic: beep beep im blocking you
xxHot_Boyxx: Unless you WANTED that message to be to you (;
angry.asthmatic: I’m blocking you until tomorrow bye
6 am
the wosews cwub
soft boy 3000: hello is anyone awake on this very nice monday morning
what the fuck richard: just got finished with your mom
soft boy 3000: :(((( but i wake up before you, I would know if you were there
stan the man: Eat ass get trashed.
what the fuck richard: Sorry Stanny, no ass tonight I was blocked
stan the man: Oh yeah? I heard about that. Eddie told me you were talking about banging his mom again.
beverly breaks bad: im tryna sleep ya fuckheads
what the fuck richard: were you with ben last night wink wink
stan the man: richard blease...
blake shelton: Its 6 am what the fuck guys
what the fuck richard: well where is edsward anywhom ??/
beverly breaks bad let the boy sleep
stan the man: Richie just hopes his dick pic sent in time.
what the fuck richard: wouldn’t you like to know (;;
stan the man: beep beep
blake shelton: gross, dude
big bill: eww richie’s dick is gross stop talkin about it
Private chat: YOU BEtteR STop and beverly breaks bad
YOU BEtteR STop: hi bev
beverly breaks bad: is richie being dumb again :(
YOU BEtteR STop: i still have him blocked is he bitching in the gc
beverly breaks bad: well,, yeah, hes just being his usual self
YOU BEtteR STop: should i unblock him now or after school or next year
beverly breaks bad: depends how much you dont want to hear from him, but id say after school.
beverly breaks bad: gives you some time to be richie-less
YOU BEtteR STop: yeah good plan he’ll probably track me down at lunch anyways but what are you gonna do
beverly breaks bad: hmm maybe hang out behind the bleachers i dont want to hear bickering today
YOU BEtteR STop: bev do you know how many fucking germs are back there i’ll end up with somebody’s infection all over my ham sandwich and it probably smells i don’t know
beverly breaks bad: well dam son we can hang out somewhere,,,cleaner??? dont think its possible here
YOU BEtteR STop: yeah… just meet me right when we get to school so we can discuss the game plan ™
Beverly breaks bad: sounds good :)
Private conversation: xxHot_Boyxx and angry.asthmatic
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: eddie retry
xxHot_Boyxx: u bicth retry
xxHot_Boyxx: m sorry retry
12 pm
The Losers Club:
what the fuck richard: homeskillet (;
12 pm
Please stop with the photos: xxHot_Boyxx is typing…
xxHot_Boyxx: homeskillet (;
12 pm
Two gays sitting in a groupchat: xxHot_Boyxx is typing...
xxHot_Boyxx: homeskillet (;
12 pm
The wosews cwub:
what the fuck richard: homeskillet (;
blake shelton: S T O P richard. Ill call the damn police if you message one more time. Ms. SOUza will murder me if you fucking text one more damn time.
stan the man: hey richie can you??? Not??? I’m going to get my phone taken because it keeps going off.
soft boy 3000: yeah, i dont wanna go to detention again :( Bowers is there all the time.
what the fuck richard: why do you have your phones sound on anyways who are you expecting a call from
blake shelton: im not a heathen, i have my vibration on so i can get an actual fucking message not spam you hecking shithead.
stan the man: do we have to ban you again...
stan the man: i’m muting all the groupchats till after school bye.
soft boy 3000: maybe give him one more chance before banning him.
4 pm
The losers club:
stan the man: I think I just failed my math test. :(
soft boy 3000: oh no :( i bet you did super good! Youre super smart!!
stan the man: Thanks Ben :)
blake shelton: ben is right!!! I love you!! Youre the best!! :)))
stan the man: heart emoji i love you too
4:10 pm
Private message: xxHot_Boyxx and angry.asthmatic
angry.asthmatic: what
angry.asthmatic: the
angry.asthmatic: FUCK
angry.asthmatic: RICHARD
xxHot_Boyxx: i knew you couldnt stay away for long (;
angry.asthmatic: i regret unblocking you,,,I thought I could actually stand you for a solid 5 seconds.
xxHot_Boyxx: come on spaghetti man,,,u love me
angry.asthmatic: very fucking debatable
xxHot_Boyxx: :((((
7 pm
xxHot_Boyxx is typing…
angry.asthmatic: stop immediately, i dont want to know what youre going to say.
xxHot_Boyxx: I was just gonna tell you that you looked cute today :(
angry.asthmatic: o,,h really? Ar e yourtru jokihn?
xxHot_Boyxx: are you drunk ???
angry.asthmatic: hahAHA no ,,,youre funny.
angry.asthmatic: im fine
angry.asthamtic: yeah im okay. Sorry
xxHot_Boyxx: knew it...the day eddie spaghetti drinks alcamahol is the day pigs learn to speak
xxHot_Boyxx: what are you up to?
angry.asthmatic: Im not drinking. I wouldnt drink underage like a lunatic
angry.astmatic: but,,, im just at home, thank you for asking like an actual human being for once.
xxHot_Boyxx: Do you want to do something later...by later I mean in 10 minutes
angry.asthmatic: thats awful soon,, what is this ‘something’ ?
xxHot_Boyxx: Guess
angry.asthmatic: why are you making me guess. I dont want to get in trouble from this something. Im trying to actually stay alive before graduation
xxHot_Boyxx: well I guess i can’t tell u then eds
angry.asthmatic: well i guess im not going then richard
xxHot_Boyxx: :((
xxHot_Boyxx: ://
xxHot_Boyxx: ok wanna come over to my house
angry.asthmatic: I suppose i could.
angry.asthmatic: be there in 5 mins.
6:40 am
The Losers Club:
big bill: guys georgie had a nightmare this morning n i wasn’t able to go back to sleep
soft boy 3000: oh no :(((
stan the man: I hope he feels better, nightmares are the worst.
big bill: yea he’s fine, but he was dreaming about that stupid clown again
blake shelton: well, hes not the only one. It still probably sucks :( hes so young still.
stan the man: you guys still think about...you know...
soft boy 3000: yeah :(( every so often i have a nightmare. They feel so real! I hate it
stan the man: It just all feels like a dream now anyways. I hope I can just forget about it eventually.
beverly breaks bad: i just try to think about what came out of that whole shit show :///
big bill: u mean the ptsd? or the nightmares?
stan the man: good morning Bev!
beverly breaks bad: good morning! :) and i meant getting to stay friends with yall for so long,,, cheesy i know.
what the fuck richard: good morning sheeple!! Smell the horizon!! Theres trouble afoot, my lads and lass!
soft boy 3000: you kind of ruined it richie but,,,good morning..?
Stan the man: Richie….Are you ok? Mentally?
YOU BEtteR STop: he said that out loud before typing that out,,he fucking woke me up saying that. I want to blcok him irl
beverly breaks bad: was it as british as it sounded in text
YOU BEtteR STop: nO because h e cant even do voices correctly. He sounded liek he was dyiunjg
what the fuck richard: come on spaghetti you love it when i do the british fellow
blake shelton: i dont think anyone likes it,,,
Stan the man: aren't you guys going to you know...go to school...it starts in 5 minutes where are you guys?
what the fuck richard: we’re a little bit preocupied if u get what i mean (;
YOU BEtteR STop: beep fucking beep richard. hes very wrong, thnwkn you very mcuh ill b e there soon
big bill: beep beep richie
stan the man: um BEEP BEEP I’m muting you guys again
blake shelton: gross u two
beverly breaks bad: I wouldn’t believe him he says that too much for it to be actually true
soft boy 3000: you guys are going to be late!!! Get to class guys!
beverly breaks bad: ok I’ll see you in a bit Ben <3
what the fuck richard: OOOOOOOOOOoooo
blake shelton: richie,,, u suck dick dont act like that
big bill: how is it possible that richie has a boyfriend and yet somehow I don’t
what the fuck richard: maybe it’s because i’m a snack
YOU BEtteR STop: he doesnt have a boyfriend, he is disgusting. I only state facts ://
big bill: oh yea? then how come you guys spent the night together then
YOU BEtteR STop: uhhh,,,
YOU BEtteR STop: oops! Class bell rang. gotta go.