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After Walden Villas it was clearer than ever before: they were going to be together. It had all happened fast - the miserable moment at the beach with their home sold, and after a short while a new place rented. Grace had never been so sure about anything in her life. For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. After the dull weeks in the retirement home she had been full of exploding energy to organize it all, and Frankie hadn’t been completely useless either. Or at least she hadn’t caused any major catastrophes.
Grace started to get used to their arrangement. Not only the flat they were living in, but also the current Grace and Frankie, which was just like the old one, but… Damn it, Grace was always lacking words when it came to this. It was a relationship, for sure, but not a romantic one, not really. It was a friendship, but was it one with those famous benefits? Not yet, and maybe never going to be. She couldn’t exactly tell if she even wanted it to be.
--
“Grace, does it bother you when I… You know, remind you of the stuff I could do to you?” Frankie’s question came out of nowhere.
“Oh, do we have to have this discussion right now? I’m driving a car and…”
“...you can’t go anywhere. Huh huh. But take it easy. I can wait for your answer and we can sit in awkward silence for a while.” Frankie crossed her arms demonstratively and started staring at the freeway in front of them. They were heading home from Los Angeles, from Coyote’s new life with Nadia.
Grace knew that she could stand the “awkward” silence for decades, and she knew that Frankie would be distracted in minutes by something she would see by the road. Hey Grace, I know that alpaca farm! We need to stop there! Grace had to be quick if she wanted to jump in the cold water and talk about it. This moment was a good one, she admitted it - she couldn’t go anywhere, couldn't have a drink, and being seated in a car on a freeway kept Frankie from doing anything weird. Oh, who was she kidding? Frankie could do anything in a car. But it was less likely. Even if she was going to say too much herself, she still would have the chance to think it over and take it back on the remaining part of the drive. She took a deep breath.
“Frankie, I appreciate your concern about my well-being and that’s why you asking me about it over and over again doesn’t bother me.”
“Okay.” Frankie rolled her eyes, seemingly waiting for her to say something more. Grace took another deep breath.
“And okay, the thought of it doesn’t... bother me either. I mean, as I’ve said every single time, we’re not doing it, but I’m not having… completely negative thoughts either. You happy now?” Grace tried to find a light tone, even though she was blushing.
“Uh-huh. What about me grabbing your ass then? Does that bother you?”
“Frankie, what the hell is this all about?” Great. Grace knew she was just hiding behind her annoyance.
“I just need to know. I don’t wanna be somebody who suggests sex in an inappropriate way. Or touches private body parts without permission. There’s enough of that in this world.”
Grace’s shoulders sagged. This was getting close, but this wasn’t necessarily going to be the big discussion about their relationship that she had been both fearing and anticipating. Grace could barely handle this approach and it was tempting not to dive any deeper.
“You silly thing, I would tell you very precisely if I was genuinely bothered. So that you know - I like you... grabbing my ass.”
Shit. The relief had made her say too much.
“You do, girl?” Frankie was beaming. “If you weren’t driving I’d do it right away again.”
“That’s why I’m gonna keep driving for a looooong time.” Grace couldn't help cracking a smile.
“You Grace Hanson, you never do what feels good for you. But I love you and your gorgeous ass anyway.”
--
Grace was a little cautious after that car ride. She didn’t stop touching Frankie’s arm or patting her shoulder, but she was more aware of doing it. She wasn’t sure if Frankie was making fewer half-dirty jokes about them. Maybe. She had been so used to it that she couldn’t tell if there was a difference. Otherwise everything was just like before. Well, Grace wasn’t quite like before, because she worked hard to overcome the fact that she had admitted that she enjoyed Frankie touching her butt. The knowledge of the exchange was like a warm promising weight in her stomach.
Grace tried to learn to breathe down to that weight, to get used to having it with her all the time. To get used to that Frankie knew about it. Of course Frankie knew her inside out and she had to know about some of this… stuff, about the… erm, grey warm area between them. Or actually Grace didn’t see it as grey, but more like purple. Warm and purple. She had a color for it, but she couldn’t quite find the words. She didn’t have the words to talk about it in her mind, and especially not with Frankie. Maybe she didn’t have to. Right now she was happy to know that it was there, and maybe, maybe it was all good.
Grace was very aware that Frankie hadn’t grabbed her ass after the significant car ride. Not like Frankie would be doing it regularly otherwise either, but a little pat actually was everyday business. And sometimes when Frankie had hugged her she had let her hands fall down her back and given her buttocks a little squeeze. When Grace thought back she was quite sure that she had always worn jeans those squeeze-times. Maybe Frankie had a thing for her ass in jeans - or maybe it just would have been too intimate through any thinner fabric. However, Grace knew that if there was a next time coming, it was going to be different. Maybe just a knowing smile from Frankie, and a blush from her, and she would be processing the incident for days. Oh, fuck, this was really the dark side of her, being so frigging sensitive, or neurotic, or whatever it was! Frankie had taught her to talk about a lot of things, but this was way beyond Vybrant or discussing sex they had had with men. It was too near, it was too important for her and she felt like she had to invent the language herself. She fucking hated the term ‘friends with benefits’, and they even weren’t that.
Grace tried to figure out what she felt about Frankie’s physical presence. She could tell that it wasn’t exactly the thing she freaked out about, possibly getting more intimate with her. No, it wasn’t that. She liked Frankie a lot and… well… yes, liked her very much. It was more like how the hell could she do it at her own pace and in her own way? And was “it” actually having sex, or just… something like that? And what if she didn’t like it, whatever it was? Didn’t like something Frankie would like? How could she come back to normal if there was a reason to come back to normal? Because the worst thing ever was to be stuck somewhere she couldn’t get away from. A relationship like an elevator stuck between floors, or like a never-ending golf round. Grace knew for sure that she wasn’t anymore going to fake or pretend anything in her life, not even for Frankie.
Grace had a vague hunch that Frankie knew about her issues, on some level anyway. She hoped that Frankie knew and that’s why she was now letting her take her time, do the necessary breathing exercises and have her gorgeous ass just for herself.
Grace wondered if she was in love with Frankie. No, she definitely wasn’t. But she definitely loved Frankie in a very special way. Trusted her more than she ever had trusted anybody. Oh, fuck, she didn’t want to think about Robert. Or the motherfucker who had stolen their pipes. Trusting was no good. But anyway, she trusted Frankie, and wondered if she trusted her so much that she could… She didn’t know. But she wasn’t really worried, because she had Frankie on her side anyway. Frankie had promised to stay no matter what, sitting with her by the sold-sign at the beach.
--
“Grace.” Frankie stood right in front of her, a mug in her hand. Grace had been dozing on the couch, her head still heavy from a flu she had had for several days. She had succumbed to Frankie’s care with almost no resistance, because she really had felt like shit. This day was better, because she had made it out of her bedroom, even it was just to crash on the living-room couch.
“No, Frankie, I’m not taking any more of that herbal ‘tea’ you forced me to drink. I’m sure I would be better off if I hadn’t taken it in the first place. Actually I could try vodka for a change.”
“Good, sounds like you’re over the worst. And this is coffee actually. No, it’s my coffee!” Frankie slapped Grace’s hand which was reaching for the mug. Grace grunted in disappointment.
“May I?” Frankie waited patiently for Grace to nod first and then sat on the couch right next to her. Grace was lying down in her robe which was uncharacteristically dirty. Grace could spot honey Frankie had spilled on it, among many other things. She didn’t really care. But she cared about Frankie who finally had laid her warm hand on her waist, and moved it smiling down to her ass, squeezing gently.
“I thought you might need a little cheer-up, lady. This okay?”
Grace blushed exactly the way she knew she would, but surprisingly she still had the ability to roll her eyes and open her mouth.
“That’s okay. But please keep your hands off anything else. So just you know, I took a shower last time on Sunday.”
“Thank you for that intriguing information. You don’t smell as bad as you could, Ms. Man Flu. But so just you know, you’re the boss here, and I’m not making any surprise moves.” Frankie’s tone was perfectly casual when she joked her way through this little negotiation. It didn’t make her touch less important, or less gentle. Grace forced herself to breathe properly and dared to shift a little, so that she would be closer to Frankie, giving her better access to her backside.
“Oh, hell, Grace. My favorite pussy-cat to stroke.”
“Frankie, for fuck’s sake, don’t you dare. But… touching my back and thighs is okay.”
“Yes, boss! And sorry for my big mouth. I couldn’t resist.”
“It’s fine, you crazy cat lady.” Grace could hear her own voice purring. This was a surprise for her - it was so easy. Everything was just like before, but Frankie was touching her in a very pleasant way. And she knew she could make her stop anytime and there wouldn’t be any questions asked.
“Can I say something?” Frankie had really taken seriously her temporary role as the humble servant.
“Of course you can, you fool with very nice hands.”
“Thanks. I mean thanks for saying so about my hands. Yeah… What I was about to say… This is a great honor for me, to take a sneak peak into Grace Hanson’s very private business. It really is. And I like touching you.”
“We could put it this way too: Frances is the only one who is brave enough to put up with my messy head. With my issues… with this.”
“Oh, I thought that Frances was the kooky one.”
“Not when it comes to… pleasure. To boundaries.”
“Well, you know my history with boundaries, there have been some issues there too. But yes, maybe pleasure…” Frankie let her voice trail off but didn’t stop stroking her back. Grace noticed she had forgotten to breathe, again.
“Frankie, I’m gonna sit up now. Keep your nice hands off me for a second, will you?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Grace blew her running nose and tried to find some dignity by straightening the goddamn shabby robe. She was very aware that she wasn’t wearing a bra - wait, wasn’t that Frankie’s thing actually - and that her hair was pretty dirty. The good thing about getting old was that her hair didn’t get greasy anymore, but she still could sense the remains of days old hairspray on her scalp.
Frankie leaned back on the couch and stretched her legs and arms. “This is my lucky day. You getting better, and cuddly.”
Grace felt a bit better at that. “If you really like me this snotty-cuddly, I can tell you that I’m not quite done yet. If you don’t mind…?” Grace settled carefully in Frankie’s arms.
“You’re doing fine, girl.” Grace was practically sitting on Frankie’s lap, and Frankie was hugging her gently.
“How…” Grace couldn’t get the words out.
“Take it easy. I’m fine. We’re fine. Don’t try to push yourself.”
“Oh, Frankie, stop being so nice to me.”
“Whatever, Miss Messy Head.” Frankie pinched her arm and made her scream.
“Damn you, Frankie. I’m a very fragile sick woman now. But I forgive you this once. Yeah… I was about to ask… Damn, how can this be so fucking hard for me! I mean, what kind of intimacy would you like to have? I mean… like… with me? Like really, if I now try to forget every shady suggestion I’ve got from you during the past three years.” Grace wanted to hide her burning cheeks, but forced herself to look at Frankie.
“Oh, honey. I’m not taking back any of them, not even the pot-headed ones I don’t remember, because I still think that you’re a striking woman and I love you in a way that escapes all definitions.” Frankie kissed her cheek.
“Grace, I’ve always been kind of curious about you. I - I have a general good feeling about being around you. And practically… I’m open-minded. I think you already know that. Let’s just see where the balloon takes us. I mean... you can take me wherever you feel like and we'll see if it works for me too. I don’t give a flying fuck about how we should have it as housemates slash best friends, or shouldn’t. And I’m not expecting anything from you. You know that, honey, right?”
Grace wiped her cheeks. “That was… You’re incredible, Frankie Bergstein, you really are.” She reached out to kiss Frankie’s forehead. “I’m not kissing you on the lips, for multiple reasons.”
“That’s fine. Like I said, I’m flexible.” Frankie rolled her eyes.
“So you’d like to kiss me?”
“Yes.”
“Good to know, but I’m not doing it now.”
“Okay.” Grace was beaming. She could do this. She could have a chat like this with Frankie and tell her what she wished for, or didn’t. Or she could learn how to tell it, and in the meantime she didn’t have to worry about getting somewhere where she didn’t want to be.
“What about you taking a nice shower now, huh?” Frankie took her hands. “I’ll make you something to eat.”
“Frankie… One more thing. If you like, you could come and sleep with me. I’ve missed you kicking me. If you don’t mind me coughing all night.”
“Of course, Grace. Oh, I’m gonna kick you so hard.”
--
“Tell me about Jerome Hodges.” Frankie was finishing her dinner, Grace was already done with hers and drinking wine. The shower had definitely been a good idea.
“How can you remember that name? You just forgot our address.”
“Of course I remember the guy involved in your first orgasm.”
“Yeah, of course.” Grace rolled her eyes.
“Tell me.”
“About the orgasm?”
“Start with Jerome. Or whatever.”
“Okay…. I was in the 11th grade, he was not my boyfriend, we had pizza, I had the orgasm.”
“Uh-huh. So there has been a time when you knew how to eat and have good normal heterosexual sex.”
“Very funny, Frankie. You want to hear the story, or not?” Sometimes Grace considered having the big serious talk about her eating with Frankie, just to make her stop the idiotic and hurtful comments. But it would be kind of letting Frankie win. Fuck her.
“Oh yes, there was that orgasm. Go ahead.”
“The long version is that Jerome was two years younger than me, Ellie Hodges’ little brother. I guess I could have called him a friend. We let him hang around with us, although he was childish and annoying, bragging about ridiculous things. I knew he had a crush on me, and I used to boss him around, like sending him to buy me cigarettes. He did it for me, but there was this twinkle in his eyes and I knew that he really wasn’t scared of me, even though most other guys my age were.
But well, I had a kind of boyfriend at the time, Ron was his name. He was from work - you know from the diner I was working at, he also did a couple of shifts a week like me. He was already in college, a nice and quite clever guy actually, so I was happy he picked me up. Ellie and the others from school didn’t know about me and him. I didn’t want to answer any questions, like if I was doing things with him and what it was like if I did.
I definitely was doing a lot of things with Ron. I had it all planned, I would learn that stuff for future use with him. But I was puzzled, because it was just goddamn awkward. He kissed me a lot and that was the worst part because I didn’t like those kisses at all. It was pretty rough and there was too much of his tongue in my mouth, and I just wanted him to get enough of it so that he would go to other places with his mouth. But he never did, got just my skirt up and I… didn’t dare to tell him that I barely could stand those “kisses”, couldn’t concentrate on anything else he was doing, what I was more interested in. It was so unlike me, because I usually told people what I wanted to have. And knew how to work my way through if there was something I couldn’t or didn’t know. Maybe the thing was that I really didn’t know what I wanted, and didn’t know how it all was supposed to feel. I was simply so insecure that it fucking breaks my heart now!”
“Breaks mine too, huh.”
“Well, I tried to avoid having sex with him, and when I couldn’t, I tried to be really fast and you can bet it didn’t get any better that way. Pretending is my middle name, you know.”
“Grace, was your middle name. Remember that. But where do we have Jerome with the twinkling eyes?”
“I’m just getting there. I got the silly idea of being alone with Jerome at their house and… well, bossing him around one more time. Just to see if it could be different when I was telling the rules, right from the beginning. It was different, I can tell you!”
“Tell me!”
“Frankie, you look like this is the most interesting story you’ve ever heard. It isn’t, trust me. Just simple hand jobs, but very pleasant ones. Like not much more than, well, calling my cousin.”
“Oh, that cousin. But you told this Jerome what to do?”
“Yeah. And what not to do. Like I told, he got off me, so it wasn’t bad at all. I kissed him but I told him to keep his tongue away. And I know that the question is coming, so no, he wasn’t inside me.”
“What happened then?”
“He asked me ‘are you my girlfriend now’ and I just laughed and walked out. I probably broke his heart. I know, I was an awful person.”
“You were.” Frankie laughed heartily. “But thanks for telling me. I’ve got the feeling that I might be breaking your code.”
“You might be. Somebody does in every, like, 55 years.”
--
Grace was proud of herself. She really was doing it her own way. The agreement had been to sleep together, but she had ended up pressing her body against Frankie and kissing her - not on the lips, but her collarbone, throat, neck and hair... Frankie had caressed her back and hip and ass just like before on the couch. It wasn’t directly arousing, but very very pleasant. And Frankie was so happy, which was absolutely the best of it.
“Grace, I really hope that this cuddly version of you isn’t just a sequela from your flu. Because I could get used to it, I really could.”
She smiled back at Frankie. “Let’s see what’ll happen when the snot leaves my brain and I can think stra… clearly again. But… Are we on the same page - we’re crossing some lines here, but I don’t feel like that I want to… have sex with you. Is that alright?”
Frankie looked a bit more seriously back. “It’s alright, Grace. It’s just perfect.”
“Good. Okay then… Erm. I --”
“Yes, honey? Remember, it’s me, and I told you to try your luck with me. If I say no, and you feel embarrassed, I’m still here to catch you.”
Grace blushed again. “I’d like to… feel your skin. I mean more of it.”
“I think we can arrange that. You may tickle my arm thoroughly, and tickle whatever you feel like tickling.”
“You’re sure?”
“Of course I am.”
“And you think it’s okay if I…?” Grace started taking off her pajama top. Frankie didn’t answer, she sat up smiling to unbutton hers. They ended up sitting side by side on the bed, bare shoulders touching. Frankie bumped her shoulder into Grace’s, and laughed.
“Just go ahead. I know you’re a boob girl, Grace.”
“Shut up, Frankie.”
“Sorry.” Frankie nudged her shoulder again. “Come here, girl. I want to feel your skin, too.”
And so Grace finally had her hands on Frankie’s breasts. Oh. So soft, and -- she felt the warm and purple very clearly, well, actually hot and purple this time. Maybe it was a bit much…
“Frankie, sorry, I need to blow my nose. I’ll be right back.”
--
“Grace, are you alright? Should I go?”
Grace made her way back from the bathroom, covering her bare breasts with her arms, and dived under the covers, right next to Frankie.
“Absolutely not. I mean, I’m alright and you shouldn’t go. If you don’t want to.”
“Okay, I’m staying, then. But listen… No, never mind.”
“Frankie, what?”
“Nothing, honestly.”
“Okay…” Grace settled in Frankie’s warmth. They didn’t talk for a while, but Grace caressed Frankie’s arms, and dared a short encounter with her breasts again, touching the sides of them with the back of her hand. Then she stopped again.
“Frankie, you didn’t actually answer me when I asked you earlier about… intimacy. You said it would be all up to me, kind of. But what if I am just curious? If I want to know… things about you? And I’m not asking because I would plan to do any of them right now with you, or maybe ever, but still. I just would like to know.”
“Do I need to remind you that I’m right now half-naked in your bed and playing with your right nipple? So I might not feel like elaborating on anything, if I don’t want to ruin this moment. I mean I’m totally comfortable with this, I love this, but if I tell you things, I guess I need some more space. Maybe a beach. And time to think first."
“Alright. So, Frankie Bergstein’s private business is even more private than Grace Hanson’s? Even if we all know that you like to make art with a paintbrush in your vagina?”
“Maybe it is more private. If I’m not allowed to joke, or make art of it, I honestly dunno. I mean, dunno how to talk about it. I can see we have something here. Something good and beautiful. It’s about me, and it’s about me and you together. That’s all I can say now.”
--
Frankie kept her promise and took Grace to the beach. They chose a route which didn’t go past the house when they headed for the spot where Frankie had been building a sand castle after she had had her closure with Sol.
The beach trip was a couple of days after Grace had… slept with Frankie. Frankie had assured her it wasn’t a one-off, but she had preferred sleeping in her own room and own bed for a while. Grace was mostly relieved - she would need time to catch up with all of this, just like Frankie did. Time to get used to this upgraded Grace and Frankie which felt very promising and only a little scary. And once again, actually nothing big had changed. It was them, just like before, after all, only added with some more hugs and pats and looks. They had a lot to do, Vybrant had been on hold during Grace’s flu, and they were also busy simply enjoying their new freedom. What the fuck had she thought when she had gone to live in a home? Well, the answer was obvious: she had thought about Frankie.
--
One thing keeping Grace busy was their fight to get their prepaid monthly fees back from Walden Villas - the manager didn’t seem to have prior experience of a former resident independently breaking the contract. A former resident who parked her Audi outside the manager’s office, walked in in high heels and did some efficient leg-crossing and head-tilting during the process of explaining what she wanted. Grace patiently pointed out that “radical change in the medical condition of the resident” didn’t have to be a negative one, and would as well free the retirement home from its responsibilities and cause immediate refund of the fees paid in advance, just like it was written in the contract. Grace didn’t mind telling that Robert had checked the contract too and he had found a couple of other points she could use if needed. But this was her own point and it was a good one. The ultimate back-up was to take Frankie with her next time and just let her annoy the manager out of his mind. But Grace had decided to keep it as short as possible, not wanting to spend any extra minutes on the grounds of this godforsaken place. She could pick up Arlene every now and then, for sure, but nothing more.
“But you ladies broke into the storage building, caused a false emergency alarm and stole and abandoned a vehicle, as I’ve been told. Do you really think you are in the position of telling me that your condition has changed radically for the better?” Grace could see that the man tried to remain serious and businesslike, but a mischievous smile danced in his eyes.
Grace let her own laughter fill the office. It was a real one, because thinking about their escape was going to be an everlasting joy for her.
“Mike - I’m sure I can call you Mike - that incident proves more than anything that we are doing so much better than two months ago! We are absolutely in no need of assisted living. My knee has healed completely (well, she might have taken a couple of extra painkillers to make her swagger just the best possible) and my partner (good God, she’s saying it this casually) has solved her slight disorientation issues - I think she was a bit depressed before, you know. Living here was a good temporary solution, and I can recommend (fuck, never!) it to my business contacts in the senior service field.”
“Your… what?”
“Didn’t you know that I run a vibrator company? Our product is designed for senior citizens. We actually had a pop up -store here a while ago and I could think of giving your residents a free workshop on masturbation!” Okay, at that point she regretted letting Frankie stay at home. She would have appreciated an audience for her one-woman show, especially Frankie laughing her ass off.
“Ms. Hanson, thank you for your kind workshop offer, I’ll discuss it with my staff later on. I’m sure we can find a solution here, if you understand that we need to charge you for last month completely, and, erm, towing the cart out of the sand?”
“That’s more than fine! Thank you for your time, Mike, and please send us the paperwork as soon as possible!” Grace made sure to hold the guy’s hand for extra long and look him in the eyes, just to play her game to the end. She would never ever come back for a workshop, and think twice about any kind of pop-ups in places like this, at least for a while.
--
But now Grace was sitting on the beach with Frankie, giving her the details about her (hopefully final) visit to Walden Villas.
“I’m not going there back either. Even though I would consider taking part in your masturbation workshop.” Frankie smiled with narrow eyes and poked her side.
“I knew you would say that.” Grace was looking at the ocean, and not at Frankie, who was looking at her intently.
“And I said it to build a bridge to my private business which I am going to tell you about.”
“I’m all ears, Frankie.”
“I’m not good at focusing, as you might know already. So please walk me through this, honey.”
“I will. For starters, to where are you building this bridge from my imaginary masturbation workshop?”
“There’s no need for a bridge actually. I wanna talk about masturbation. Other than as in Vybrant research and development team.”
“Go ahead.”
“Could you go first?”
“I could, but weren’t you going be brave and talk today?”
“Yeah, I was… Well. I like it a lot, I mean my private fun, and having my personal space. And since I’m now living with you in that apartment… It’s less square feet, just one floor, and we’re emotionally and physically sharing more. So I kind of want to be sure that me having my own fun doesn’t bother you in any sense. Like… if something we’re doing or talking about happens to turn me on I can go to my own space and finish it off, with no need for explaining, or making any excuses including cousins or other relatives. And of course the same would apply to you. You could kick me out of your bed because of the same reason, or for any reason, if needed.”
“Oh. I thought we were already past that line, and kind of knew each other’s… patterns for private fun. Or did I ever interrupt you in your studio while you were at it?”
“No, you didn’t. But I meant now with this updated version of us. Like the other night you were touching my breasts, and I… If you’d gone on a bit longer, or kissed them, I think I would have needed to excuse myself and have a private moment. Or we would have needed...” Now Frankie was blushing.
“Oh.” Grace smiled and felt a special warmth spreading all around her. “Sorry for teasing you. So just you know, I felt the same. That’s why I stopped there.”
“I could sense that. And it was beautiful, you looking like that, a bit carried away. That… Fuck, I didn’t plan to say this because I understand it fully first now, but it was the combination of having my boobs taken care of and you looking like that which turned me on.”
Grace was still smiling, even though her mind went blank for a second. Frankie thinks it’s beautiful.
“So Grace, it was beautiful, and a bit scary. Scary because I don’t know how much I’m ready to share, and I don’t know how much you are ready to share. But there’s some serious sharing happening, that’s a fact. And I’m positive I wanna go on with it. If you are.”
“I am.” Grace shifted towards Frankie and cupped her face, and kissed her forehead. They froze for a moment. “Oh, fuck it.” Grace rolled her eyes, cracked a crooked smile, then a softer one, and finally kissed Frankie on the lips, let it linger, and let Frankie take her time to answer it. It was better than she had thought. Frankie’s lips were so soft and tender, but it wasn’t anything extraordinary. It was more the symbol value of it, the same lucky feeling when she had earlier called Frankie her partner. And again the happy smile on Frankie’s face.
“Was it so bad?”
“No, it was okay. But don’t think I’m going to start kissing you all the time. That would be just too… normal. I’m gonna go on enjoying the chance to be as weird as I actually am.”
“Good. I like that. Fuck normal. As I said before, I love looking into Grace Hanson’s very private business, and it would be so much less interesting if it wasn’t genuinely, erm, a bit weird.”
“Well, erm, thanks?” Grace poked Frankie’s shoulder.
“You’re welcome. Says the woman who still is the less normal of us two.”
“Don’t think too much of yourself. I might have some surprises left for you. No, I’m not telling now, and I guess I don’t even know all of it myself.” Grace put her arm around Frankie’s shoulders and leaned in. They were silent for a while.
“Grace, may I ask you something about you and kissing? You absolutely don’t have to answer this.”
“Yeah?” Grace felt something stiffen inside of her. Frankie couldn’t know it, of course she couldn’t.
“You remember when you first time kissed Guy? On the porch? And I happened to see it?”
“Yes? What about it?” Grace tried to sound nonchalant.
“Grace. You don’t have to answer. I know very well that this is sensitive. But… I could see that it definitely was on your initiative. And you looked like you knew exactly what you wanted.”
Grace was a little relieved. She could do this one. “Hey. I told you my middle name was pretending. And… It was very deliberate to have it done there. So that I could end it by saying good night, and close the door.” And finally be inside our home and tell you about it.
“Okay… so it was something you just had to ‘have done’?”
“I wanted to see Guy again. That’s why a kiss was needed there, I thought. My tactic is to be the one who kisses first. So I can be the one who ends the kiss, before it gets too awkward. By the way, it strikes me a bit that you remember pretty well a kiss you saw, like over three years ago.” Grace’s intention had been to be tease Frankie with the last comment, but it came out very softly.
“Hmm, I might have liked to be kissed like that, that’s why I remember it so well.” Frankie’s voice was equally soft. “Didn’t understand it really back then. But I can recall some mixed feelings I had. I thought I was jealous just because I also wanted to have a boyfriend. And of course it was confusing because your boyfriend had eaten somebody - “
“Frankie, that joke is getting pretty old, isn’t it? And I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I’m never going to kiss you like that.”
“I know.” Frankie laced their fingers and they sat quiet for a while. Then Frankie gave Grace’s hand a little squeeze.
“And I know that if we sit here any longer I’ll need help to get you up. So c'mon.”
--
“Frankie.”
“Yeah?” They were watching TV, aka fooling around on the couch. Frankie could hear that it was one of Grace’s serious Frankies. Like when Grace had been watching her cook and when her messing around in the kitchen had reached a point that an intervention was needed.
“Please, stop. That’s too nice.” Grace’s voice was now a lot softer than her ‘Frankie' would have indicated. Frankie’s fingers had been under Grace’s blouse, caressing the bare skin on her hip and lower back.
“Okay. You could stop what you’re up to around my neck too, actually. Because if I know you are in that state, I’ll be there soon too. Or, well, if I’m honest, I already am.”
“Frankie, this is actually silly. It was the same yesterday evening, we didn’t make even two episodes. It’s not going away - I turn you on, you turn me on.” Grace poked with her nose Frankie’s temple and kissed her cheek. “That’s us now, and I think we just have to learn to live with that.”
“Now you make it sound like yeast or hemorrhoids.”
“You know I didn’t mean it that way. As I’ve said, I think it’s good and beautiful.”
“You actually never said that. It was me.”
“Well, anyway, I’m saying it now. And I think I could go for it. I mean, I wouldn’t mind some more sharing.”
“Grace Hanson, are you now suggesting that we have sex?”
“Yes.” Grace looked her right in the eyes with an impish smirk. There was absolutely no hesitation.
Frankie sat properly up and turned off the TV. “Well then. What kind of sex? Jerome Hodges style, or something else?”
“How the fuck should I know? I want to get off. That kind of sex. But when you now brought up Jerome… Well, yes, I’m in. It happened in his tree hut, so that feature is kind of hard to reconstruct.”
“Oh, Grace, why didn’t you tell me that in the first place? That must have been the coolest orgasm ever! In a tree hut, wow.”
“I saw that you were excited enough without that fact.”
“You mean thing, never withhold information like that from Frances! So you actually didn’t walk out, but climbed down the tree after dumping him? That kind of shifts the focus a bit.”
“Yeah, it wasn’t all that dramatic. And I might have said to him that I’m sorry, and asked him to be my friend anyway. So.”
“Now I don’t know what to believe. But I want to believe in the tree hut anyway.”
“It stank of cigarette butts and moldy cartoons, and had bird droppings all over it. But it was really high, and I could see the blue sky through the leaves.”
“Can we hold the idea of the blue sky and transport it to your bed?”
“Hmmm… I’m starting to like the idea of reconstruction. What about the balcony?”
“Grace!” Frankie was surprised, and so delighted. “I mean, hell yes, I’m in. It was cool to break into Sheree’s house with you, but this could beat it.”
“Funny that you brought up the break-in. That’s probably one of the best moments in my entire life.”
“I could see that. But now, action, lady. I’ll fix some covers, could you grab the lube?” Frankie was already on her feet and going.
“Shit, looks like it’s really happening. Well, okay then.”
--
“What do you think, are we getting in the mood again?” Frankie was busy organizing cushions and covers and lighting candles all over the balcony with a nervous fever. She hit a wind chime with her head and cursed.
“Take it easy, Frankie. We probably will. And if we don’t, then so what? We can sit here and continue watching Ray Donovan from my phone. Or vlog about lesbian sex gone bad.” Grace was leaning against the door frame and watching her with a broad carefree smile on her face. Frankie looked at her, relieved.
“Thank goddess it’s just you. And don’t get me wrong, ‘just you’ equals now the best thing in the world.”
“I get it. Come here, girl.” Grace pulled her in a hug. It hit Frankie how thin and brittle Grace felt against her body, but it hit her even more how Grace could be so warm and hold her so near. It was a proper unhurried embrace, Grace’s hips and breasts meeting hers. This was now definitely different from all the previous tentative line crossings and half-panicked caresses.
“Frankie, look at me.” Grace took her hands and kissed her knuckles. “I’m nervous as shit, too. Let’s take our time. It can be a bit tricky to change focus from avoiding arousal to looking for it.”
“You’re right. First I worried about being too turned on, now I worry about not getting there. This is fucked-up.”
“Yeah… But right now, just hold me, put your hand on my lower back. Like you did before.”
Frankie did it and Grace started kissing her throat and neck, again unhurried and gentle.
“Grace, I need to say one more thing. No, don’t stop that! Good… I can’t believe that it’s me turning you on, that it’s me who you’re letting in.”
Grace stopped and looked at Frankie. “For Christ’s sake, of course it’s you.” Grace sounded a bit frustrated, even though she gave her a quick smile. “If you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m not letting you in just because you happen to be there, but because I love you. Sometimes I hate you, but most of the time I love you so much that I kind of feel I’m bursting. And every now and then I feel that I’d like to show you how much I love you. Like now. So, stop wondering. I might be a bit weird and messed-up, but for me this thing is very clear, that it’s you I’m letting in.”
“I love you too, Grace.”
“I know. And now I hate you because you brought up the big feelings and I lost my track. Now I’m going to kick off my jeans and knickers and see if that will help us with the navigation. And I’m still reminding you that if it doesn’t, watching TV outside in candlelight without pants would be a nice thing to do too.”
“It probably would.” Grace really started unzipping her jeans, and she didn’t look shy at all. She sat down on the balcony couch, her jeans halfway down, and pulled Frankie to sit with her. She stroked Frankie’s thigh and hip through her long dress. “Are you wearing something under this?”
“No.”
“Like ever?”
“I’m not telling you. I like to have my secrets.” Frankie looked smugly at her.
“That’s bullshit, you can’t keep a secret like that. And in case you forgot, I do our laundry, so I know quite about your underwear usage.”
“I’ll let you know next time when I am wearing knickers.”
“Okay. However. Could you think about tossing that dress anyway? Jerome Hodges didn’t have breasts, so I let him have his shirt on.” Grace pulled off her black-and-white striped T-shirt. “What actually happened in that tree hut didn’t include any unnecessary touching, and with you I can handle a little more. I guess, a lot more. Holding you feels just so fucking good.” Again the impish smirk from Grace, and Frankie felt like she was melting.
“I didn’t take the reconstruction plan so literally either, I think the point is that you communicate your needs to me.”
“Well, now my need is to be with you under these covers. And stop talking for a little while.” At that point Grace was completely naked and helped Frankie to pull off her dress. Grace’s determination surprised Frankie at first a little - and then it didn’t surprise her at all. This woman was effective, and passionate, and now when it came to this, also gentle in a breathtaking way. Grace was caressing Frankie’s body unhurried and confident, her Grace who claimed she didn’t like to touch people. Grace who slipped a leg between hers and who looked with an open and warm smile at her while doing so.
“I think I need to say this out loud. I’m worried because my wrists have been really shit lately. I absolutely want to get you off, but we need to be careful.”
“Right now I’m perfectly happy with this…. Huh.” Frankie took a heavy breath and moved closer. She didn’t know which was better, the friction and heat rising between her legs, or the look Grace was giving to her. In the dim light Grace looked so happy and comfortable with all of this, now laying half on top of her and planting kisses wherever she could reach.
“My wrists are better and I really really would like to touch you. So I suppose if I see you come first it will do part of the job and your wrists don’t have to work that hard. And of course I’ll help.”
“I might have my issues with kissing, but I guess I could try… using my mouth too. I mean, if that’s okay for you.”
“Oh, Grace… I guess it would be very okay. But let’s take this easy, right? It’s not only about getting there, it’s me and you, right now, right here. And now, please, pull back a little, so that I can…”
--
Grace had been so intensively there, looking her right in the eyes. Grace not wanting to kiss her gave them the possibility to that very exquisite eye contact and Frankie wouldn’t have changed that. Grace just was that way, and she could enjoy every other way of touching her. It had taken time before Grace came, but the way there had been a pleasant exploration - first gentle strokes, then Frankie’s fingers deep inside her - and Grace telling what she wanted all the way along, maintaining her half-blunt and witty approach while giving her instructions.
Grace had kissed Frankie properly after she had got off. Frankie had looked at her with sincere worry.
“Was it you Grace, or were you faking?”
“The kiss? It was at least 85 per cent me. And before, I didn’t fake at all.”
“Good girl. And by the way, I meant the kiss. I know that I got you off. It was beautiful.”
Frankie had been right about herself - she didn’t need a lot to come after having her hands on (and in) Grace. Grace had chosen first to sit behind her - after being properly warmed up they didn’t care about the covers anymore, and the shiver from the cooling air outside was a welcome element to their ‘tree hut’ experience.
Grace had been leaning against Frankie’s back for a while, letting her breathing get steadier again, and maybe having a moment just for herself. Then Grace had caressed properly Frankie’s breasts from that position, and everything else as well, Frankie squirming and panting already quite impatiently. Grace had rearranged them, wanting to see Frankie’s face properly, letting Frankie sit and lean against the backrest of the couch. Grace had settled right next to her, adding lube, and gone on stroking her clit and changing her angle to protect her wrists. When Frankie could see Grace’s face again she had been almost shocked - Grace’s eyes were shining and she was so genuinely excited about what she was doing that it was both hilarious and very… hot. Frankie couldn't help laughing aloud at that sight, a very breathy laugh, and right after that she had come. Grace quirking her eyebrows in amusement after that had been almost as good as the orgasm.
--
Frankie had fallen asleep at some point during their lazy afterglow chat. Frankie and the covers were keeping Grace warm now and she didn’t want to worry about the moment it would get too cold to be naked outside. When they had picked the apartment she hadn’t paid any extra attention to the balcony - nothing could compare to their old patio and the whole beach - but now she could see the best side of it: nobody could see or hear what they were up to there.
Grace smiled in the dark. So what if she couldn’t define what she and Frankie were together. They were on the same page anyway, right now both with equally sticky fingers. Frankie was snoring against her back and holding her tight. This was good.