Chapter Text
The business trip got longer unexpectedly, and the fatigue mixed with annoyance into a mess. Especially on days like today, when he had to make a personal trip down to Busan to convince the arrogant buyers and sleep in a hotel for more than two days. For the sensitive Changmin, even the best of suite rooms were only just uncomfortable places that were 'not home'.
Changmin had just returned to the hotel after listening to the German language for over three hours and finished off he deal and asking his secretary to book the earliest flight back to Seoul. In the elevator, he loosened his tie that had been choking him for the entire day, then walked down the carpet lining the hallway.
"You dirty little whore!"
Such crude words to be heard on a floor full of the best suite rooms in the finest hotel.
Changmin frowned and sighed. Just as he was thinking that he would never set foot in this hotel again, the suite room door laden with intricate designs flew open roughly with a bang, and a boy who was clearly a mess even from a distance flung himself out of the suite. The boy was clutching his shirt that had been ripped open, and he ran with a limp. His eyes met Changmin's. Changmin saw that his cheek was swollen red and his lips were bloody. For the short but long while, the two of them stared into each other's eyes.
Then the boy approached Changmin and took hold of his suit jacket.
"Help me…"
Changmin looked down at the young boy, who had tears falling from his eyes. Changmin's thick eyebrows furrowed slightly. The boy's dark eyes reflected into Changmin's. Ironically, the boy's eyes, which likely held the dirtiest backstory, looked innocent and clear.
"Please save me… Sir…"
Changmin finished assessing the situation and spoke to the boy dryly. "I don't make losing deals."
"…Sir?" whimpered the boy.
"If I help you, what will you do for me?"
The boy's gaze shook. He looked like a kitten drenched in the storm, mewing for help.
"You!"
The boy's face filled with terror hearing the voice of the man who had come after him in a bathrobe. He let out a sorrowful sob and squeezed Changmin's suit jacket.
"Anything. I'll give you anything… Please help me…"
Changmin's lips curved up, satisfied, and the boy hid behind him.
"Hey, you!! You want to die?"
"I don't think you're the only person staying at this hotel," said Changmin calmly.
"It's none of your business. Get on your way."
"It's so loud, I can't get on my way," said Changmin. His eyes became dark, and the man couldn't easily lash out at Changmin's aura.
"He looks like a minor. I guess you sex traffic minors here like it's nothing?" said Changmin gracefully. It was obvious through Changmin's attitude towards this aggressive man that he had never bowed his head to anyone before in his life.
"Sex trafficking and assault of a minor. I think this will be enough bother, don't you think? If you have enough money to stay here, it probably means you're at a level where you have to worry about your stocks. Can I give you a warning? If I report this, it won't just be your stocks, but also your name that's going to fall into the dirt. Because… I think my money will be stronger than yours. So much so that if you try to cover this up with your money, I'll be able to pull this out again with twice as much."
The man, clearly having felt danger from Changmin's unbothered tone, swore and returned to his room. Changmin looked down at the boy who had fallen to his knees behind him. For reasons he didn't understand, he saw the shaking boy as more dangerous than pitiful. The riskiness that Changmin didn't feel even with adults was exuding from this boy. Was this what pushed this boy to the shadows?
"Get up unless you have broken bones."
The boy got up gingerly at Changmin's emotionless tone.
"Name."
"P…Pardon?"
"Answer me if you heard me."
"Oh… Yunho. Jung Yunho…"
The boy looked up at Changmin and bit his lips.
"Follow me."
Yunho sat on the big leather couch awkwardly. He pulled out a couple of tissues from the box on the table and wiped his bloody lip with them. He was so tired of himself, for having followed another man he didn't know. He was thrown out mercilessly from the fence of adults that should have been taking care of him, and he had tried to work part-time jobs for his ill younger sister, but all that was available to him was low-paying jobs that paid not much more than five dollars an hour. He needed much more money. That's why he crossed the line that he shouldn't have. At first, it had been hard and scary. But he became used to it little by little, and when he realized that he could earn large sums of money at once, he couldn't stop himself. He had no intention of stopping himself – because he couldn't also lose his sister.
Changmin toweled his wet hair dry in a bathrobe and sat on the sofa across from him. He exuded an aura that was almost suffocating. Yunho had never met anyone with such an aura before.
"You do sex work?"
It was the truth, but hearing it such blatantly made Yunho feel embarrassed and humiliated. Instead of answering with words, Yunho nodded.
"Why?"
Yunho spoke after fiddling his fingers for a little while.
"I needed money for my sister's hospital fees."
Changmin laughed at the stale, cliché answer. He felt frustration well up in his chest, like he was watching some third-rate drama.
"Nineteen?"
"…Eighteen."
"A high school student who does sex work to earn money for his sister's hospitalization."
Yunho didn't answer.
"You followed the man into the suite room because he called a price that was much higher than what you usually get. But you see… it's those with money who are dirtiest and creepiest."
"…"
"You went in, not knowing what to expect, and got scared at what he wanted to do to you. You tried to stand up to him and he beat you up. You were getting beaten up and thought, ah… I could die like this… and you ran away from the room and I happened to be there. Right?"
Yunho bit down hard on the inside of his cheek at the man, who was saying his story like he was reading an interesting novel.
"What, does that make you feel upset?"
"It certainly doesn't make me feel happy," said Yunho quite insolently, and Changmin couldn't help but let out a small chuckle.
Changmin actually had no idea what he was going to do with the boy. He wasn't one to be impulsive and he was completely indifferent to things that didn't have to do with him, so this was the first time that he had involved himself into a situation like this, especially one that that could turn out messy.
He was bored. He was tired, and bored. It was then that the not-so-ordinary boy ran into his arms with his own feet. That was all. This was just entertainment, nothing more, nothing less.
"I'll pay for the hospital, a place for you to live, and your tuition."
Yunho's eyes became round.
"So stop doing that dirty work."
"…Why?"
"You have to ask why I'm telling you not to do sex work anymore?"
"No… I mean, I have to already repay you for helping me before, so why are you helping me even…"
"Sponsorship. Yes, let's call it sponsorship. I have lots of money, and I'm bored. I guess I want to know what kind of happiness comes from helping kids like you. Should we say, the joys of giving? And I don't associate myself with cheap human beings who sell themselves. I'm going to clean you up first, then have you repay me for it."
Yunho flushed. The man was trampling on Yunho with his words. It was more hurtful and humiliating than being beaten. He knew that Yunho wouldn't be able to refuse – and he was right. Yunho wasn't in a place where he could do meaningless weighing between his pride and the money that was being offered to him. Maybe he was a cheap human being like the man was saying after all.
"Don't think too much. I'm interested in you, and you just have to enjoy it."
Changmin leaned back on the couch.
"I know you won't be able to refuse. My secretary will sort everything out tomorrow. It's getting late. Sleep in any room."
Yunho watched blankly as Changmin got up from the couch and disappeared into a room.
Was this what winning the lottery felt like? His sister was transferred to a university hospital in Seoul, and he was given a condo in the most expensive part of the city. He transferred to a private school nearby.
It all felt like a dream. He begged a man he'd never seen before to help him, and the man was helping Yunho with his life itself.
"Director will contact you using this phone from now on. He gave instruction not to save any other numbers on it," said the secretary with an expression as crisp as his suit. He handed over the phone to Yunho.
"Th… Thank you."
"Please contact me if you need anything."
"Yes, sir."
When the secretary left, Yunho let go of all the remain strength in his body and buried himself in the couch.
It was quiet.
It wasn't a dirty alleyway where scary and noisy middle-aged men were always walking, and it wasn't a yellowing bed in a smelly motel filled with moans.
He leaned his head back and the high ceiling came into view.
Would it be this spacey, posh house that would be warmer, or the small one-room with ripped wallpaper that leaked water when it rained? How did I get here? Why did I need not to be normal, just to be normal? Why did I have to dirty myself for things that I should be taking for granted?
But what did it matter? I have everything now.
I am happy.
Yunho slid down on the couch and curling his knees into his chest, whispered in a low voice:
"I am happy."
A tear fell from the corner of the eye.
He didn't know if it was a tear of happiness or sadness.
Honestly, he didn't understand.
It's been three weeks already, and in all that time, he hadn't come into the house.
Yunho had been preparing himself; though he called it sponsorship, he realized that he would be selling his body now to one person instead of anyone. But he didn't step foot into the place even once, and Yunho was starting to feel uncomfortable here.
Did he have money to burn? Was he really just sponsoring?
Yunho jumped up from the couch when he heard the front door unlock. It was him.
Yunho walked towards the door awkwardly, and bowed.
"You do have manners, don't you," chuckled Changmin after one look at Yunho. He walked past the living room and into the bedroom. Yunho hesitated, unsure whether to follow him into the room, then he went into the room too, scratching the back of his head.
"What are you doing?" asked Changmin.
"S-Sorry?"
"Aren't you going to take it?" said Changmin with his jacket on his finger.
"Oh."
Yunho took the jacket hurriedly and hung it clumsily on the hanger.
"It's new."
Yunho looked up.
"How you look all cleaned up, I mean."
It was understandable, since the only time Changmin had seen Yunho was when Yunho was a complete mess after having been beaten up.
But it was new for Yunho as well. It was so awkward that Yunho could hardly breathe.
"Sit."
The two of them sat down with the table between them.
"You feel awkward?" asked Changmin, sounding amused.
Yunho hadn't even been able to make eye contact with Changmin. It was awkward to see him after almost an entire month, but it was also burdensome to know that the man sitting across from him was taking care of everything in Yunho's life.
"A bit…"
"I've been busy. I've been hearing from my secretary how you've been doing while you were here. I'm going to be freer now, so we'll see each other more often."
"Will you be staying here from now on?"
"Yes, if there's nothing too pressing."
Of course, he brought me here to use me as a sex toy. He wasn't a charity after all, why would he be helping otherwise? Nothing was free in this world.
"Then… should I shower and get ready?"
Changmin raised the ends of his eyebrows at Yunho's words.
"What?"
"I'll get ready so it'll be easy for you to do it right away."
"Easy for me to do what," asked Changmin, his expression hardening more and more.
Yunho trailed off uncertainly. "No, I just… thought…"
"For sex?"
Yunho bit down on his lips.
"Are you saying you're going to shower and get ready to entertain me?"
Yunho was so frustrated he was going to go crazy. There is no way that he doesn't know what I'm talking about, so what is he doing, pretending not to know what I'm talking about? What does he want from me?
"Isn't that why you brought me here?"
Changmin sighed.
"I feel so uncomfortable, I'm going to go insane. I'm really grateful… I'm really grateful for everything you're doing for me, thank you. But nothing is free in this world. I know you're doing this to sleep with me in the end. You don't have to think about how I feel. You can just do it whenever you want. It's fine."
Changmin shook his head and laughed as if he didn't believe his ears. And then he looked right at Yunho.
"You're right. I'm going to sleep with you."
Yunho swallowed. "…Then I'm going to shower."
"But I'm not going to have sex with you now," chuckled Changmin. "I told you already. I don't associate myself with cheap human beings who sell themselves."
Yunho bit his lower lip, hard.
"I have no intention of having sex with an eighteen-year-old who used to sleep around with whoever."
Yunho glared at Changmin. "So why did you bring me here?"
"So I can make you into a normal, eighteen-year-old Jung Yunho."
Yunho stared.
"A normal eighteen-year-old Jung Yunho, who goes to school, eats dinner, goes to visit his sister in the hospital, and does his homework and plays games and laughs and plays."
Yunho felt his eyes welling up with tears. His lip trembled.
"When all the shadows are gone from your face – that's when I'm going to sleep with you."
"…"
"Like I said, I don't sleep with cheap human beings."
Changmin chuckled. "So don't say things like that anymore. I know you're hurting yourself as you're saying it. That's not okay. At all."
Yunho let out a sob.
"I'm going to shower myself," said Changmin. "I'm getting hungry. If there's instant noodles or something, go make some."
Changmin got up from the chair and patted the top of Yunho's head for a split second.
"Stop crying. I hate the sound of people crying."
"Are these noodles or a river," demanded Changmin.
In front of him was a pot of instant noodles that looked bland, even just by sight. It was only when he stirred with his chopsticks that the noodles were visible at all.
"I'm… not so good at cooking…"
"How are you so useless in every way?" sighed Changmin.
Yunho's face fell. He looked up into the pot of noodles, and he couldn't even argue – because they really did look bad.
Changmin waved his hand for Yunho to take them away.
"Just leave the dishes in the sink. The cleaner can do it. You have school tomorrow, right?"
"Yes, sir."
"It's getting late, then. Let's go to bed."
Yunho was just standing awkwardly by the bed, not being able to get in it – Changmin was already lying in it. Were they sleeping with each other…? But he said earlier that he wasn't going to sleep with him…
"What are you waiting for? You're not going to get into bed?"
"You… said earlier that you weren't going to sleep with me," murmured Yunho uncertainly, and Changmin laughed again.
"Is that all you think of when I say 'sleep'? I mean, let's go to sleep."
"Oh…"
It was so very strange and awkward. Yunho lied stiffly in the bed, and looked up at the ceiling, unable to look in Changmin's direction. And a long while later, Yunho turned his head towards him. Changmin had his head turned towards Yunho with his eyes closed. His breaths were regular – he was probably asleep.
Yunho finally looked carefully at his face.
The dark eyebrows, long eyelashes, the high, pretty nose, thick lips.
He was handsome.
He was very handsome.
Yunho turned towards him carefully as not to wake him. He hadn't been able to look at Changmin's face earlier, and he wanted to look again carefully, slowly.
"He's handsome."
He stung, but somehow, he was also warm. Was this man who pulled him up from the dirty sewers different from everyone else?
What kind of a person are you?
Who are you?