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It was Geri who introduced him to the group. He knew the guys from seeing them around the campus, but Leo had never talked with any of them because he preferred to keep to himself and to the people he already knew. Geri, though, seemed to know everyone, and didn’t even hesitate to introduce him to Sergio’s group of friends—or the part of the group that was present at the time. Some people, like Isco and Sergio’s boyfriend, Iker, he would only meet later on.
The ones he met first gave the impression of them being a cheerful lot. There was Sergio, Geri’s friend, a loud guy with the reputation of getting into bar fights—Leo would never have said they were friends if he didn’t know better, since they spent most of their time fighting—; Luka, Ivan’s boyfriend whom Leo had never met until then, but who was so charming that Leo could instantly understand why they’ve been together for so long; Toni, a German guy who Leo knew next to nothing about; James, who held the sun in his smile, and who Leo could have developed a crush for on the spot if it weren’t for the last guy, Cristiano.
Leo was instantly charmed by Cristiano, who was so far out of his league that Leo couldn’t even see the finish line. He had dark hair and equally dark eyes, beautifully tanned skin, was probably half a meter taller than Leo, and though he was dressed at the time, Leo could bet that he would have a body to kill for—Leo’s suspicions would be proven right in due time. Cristiano smiled briefly when they were introduce, just a polite little thing that Leo returned, and they didn’t share a word that day.
Cristiano seemed to be an integral part of the group. While he was certainly a bit reserved around Leo and the people he didn’t know, he seemed to be really close with the rest of his friends: he was always sharing jokes with Sergio, and bickering with Marcelo, one of his roommates. Luka would sit on his lap more often than not, and Leo was almost positive that he and James were dating.
In addition to being friendly and outgoing, Cristiano was also incredibly focus and disciplined, something that left Leo astonished. Cristiano would always already be at the library when they arrived, and once when Leo came in half an hour early, Cristiano was already there, nose deep in his books. He kept his notes organized and planned out his day in a such a way that he managed to fit in an unreasonable amount of study hours, time to work out, and enough hours for a decent sleep. He would refuse invitation after invitation to parties and dinners—another thing that perplexed Leo, since he would expect Cristiano to be the kind of guy who enjoyed partying—, preferring to stay home and study instead. He would think Cristiano insane if he wasn’t so awed by his determination.
Leo and Cristiano never exactly fell in, not in the way Leo had done with Geri, or Ney, or even, in a weird way, with Sergio. They would talk every now and then, share study notes on the subjects they had in common, help each other out in some exercises, but Leo wouldn’t call them friends.
However, of all the things Leo found out about Cristiano, there was one in particular that stood out.
The first time he noticed it, it was a Saturday afternoon, and they were at a party—more like a barbecue—at Sergio’s house. Cristiano had arrived an hour ago, announcing that he could only stay until after dinner because he had to wake up early in the next day, but everyone was so content to see him enjoying himself that no one really cared about the time he had to go back.
They ended up organizing a little football match. Leo was on Geri’s team with Neymar, Ivan and a couple of other guys, while Sergio had claimed Iker, Cristiano, Marcelo snd some of the guys from Leo’s new study group. Leo had always felt comfortable with a ball on his feet, and he knew he was good with it, too. To his surprise, so were the other guys. Cristiano stood out to him, playing with a ferocity that characterized him in everything he did, and that Leo found out was a major turn on. The match ended up bringing up their more competitive side, and a small tournament had developed by the time the sun started to come down and the smell of grilled food filled the air.
He was resting beside a shirtless Cristiano, listening to him talking excitedly with Kaká, one of his best friends who had appeared about twenty minutes ago. He wasn’t actually listening to the conversation—not that he would understand a thing of it, since they were talking in Portuguese—, but he let the words wash over him as he rested his eyes.
“Leo!” He opened his eyes to see Sergio in front of him, dressed in a purple apron and holding a spatula in his hand. “Veggie, chicken or pork burger?”
“Uh… Pork?” He asked, not really sure. He was so hungry that anything would do.
“Two?” Sergio offered, and Leo nodded in agreement.
He listened to him ask Cristiano and Kaká what he wanted, and then asked Sergio before he could go away, “Where’s the toilet?”
“Go inside, through the hallway on your left and it is the first door on your right,” Sergio answered. “If that one is occupied, just go upstairs. My room is the second on the left.”
Leo nodded in thanks and got up, using Cristiano’s arm to hoist himself. He wouldn’t even have noticed what he’d done if it wasn’t for the struggled sound Cristiano let out. Leo regarded him, and felt a blush creep on his cheeks at the haunted look Cristiano had. “Sorry,” he murmured under his breath, and hurried to get inside.
The second time Leo noticed it, he was drunk. The party had been at his and Geri’s house this time, a much more intimate affair with only a few of their friends present. Sergio and Iker were making out in the corner—no shirts were off yet, so Leo was cool with it—, Geri was discussing loudly with Neymar and Leo was content to spend his time between enjoying the feeling of being drunk and watching James and Marcelo drunk-dancing together.
He was nursing a bottle of wine—cheap, tasteless wine—that he was sharing with Kun and Luis when the bell rang.
“I’ll go,” he offered, though nobody listen. He gingerly got up, bumping into James as he made his away across the small living room and towards the door.
He opened it as the person rang the bell again, the sound awfully loud in his ears now that he was close, and found himself staring into a large chest. He moved his eyes up, over Cristiano’s lips until he found Cristiano’s eyes, and blinked in surprise.
“Oh, hey.”
Cristiano smiled, only a bit awkward. “Hey,” he offered. “I came to pick up Celo and Hammie. I promised I would give them a ride.”
Leo let the words wash over him, letting his slow mind unscramble them, and nodded. “Of course. You better come in.”
Cristiano smiled in agreement and waited for Leo to move out of the way. Instead, though, Leo moved forward and onto to the tip of his toes so he could greet Cristiano with a kiss on his cheek, letting them linger just a bit longer on Cristiano’s warm skin.
He moved back then, giving Cristiano enough space for him to come in. Cristiano seemed a bit flustered as he did so, a blush coming up on his tanned cheeks, and Leo felt a bit proud at receiving such a reaction.
It happens so quickly that Leo’s not sure how it happened at all. They were at Cristiano’s house studying—which was also Toni, Marcelo and Isco’s house—but, for some reason, Leo and Cristiano had ended up being the only ones studying. Sara was out in the balcony with Pilar and Gio, while most of the boys had gone to the kitchen to get something to eat and never came back. Luka and Ivan were lounging on the couch, somewhere between talking and making out, which Leo only knew because he had passed by the living room on his way to the bathroom about twenty minutes ago.
Still, even though the table was now empty, neither Leo nor Cristiano had cared to move places, not at all bothered to be studying side by side.
And that’s where Leo lost it. One moment he and Cristiano were discussing the exercise they were solving, trying to figure out which of them was thinking right, and the next moment Leo had his lips covered by Cristiano’s.
It took him a while to register Cristiano’s full lips in his own and he was about to pull away and ask him what he was doing, when Cristiano started on working on getting his tongue down Leo’s throat, and really, who was Leo to interrupt that?
Remembering the empty room they were in, Leo took no time to climb to Cristiano’s thighs, straddling his lap so they were kissing in a more comfortable position, instead of hurting their necks needlessly.
Leo moved his hands from Cristiano’s face to the hem of his shirt, and then underneath it, so he could feel Cristiano’s hard muscles twitching under his touch. Cristiano broke the kiss then so he could let out a breathless moan, grasping Leo’s waist harder.
“God, you’re so sensitive,” Leo laughed, running his hand up so he could flick one of Cristiano’s nipples, biting his jawline at the same time, and making Cristiano thrust up in response.
“Shut up,” Cristiano whined, kissing Leo again so he wouldn’t speak.
Leo was seriously considering jerking them off right there, when James’s voice cut through the fog of arousal that had risen in his head. “Oh, guys, they’re making out,” he said conversationally, not sounding at all bothered or intrigued.
Leo hears him go away, the steps light on the wooden floor, but the interruption had been enough to make him painfully aware of where they were, surrounded by their friends, in a room with an open door. Resigned, he climbed out of Cristiano’s lap and sat back on his chair.
Cristiano looked pleased with himself, but there was pink tinge on his cheeks that Leo just couldn’t wait to see how far down it went.
To Leo’s delight, Cristiano was wonderfully responsive in bed. He whimpered and moaned so prettily with each of Leo’s touches, always seeming like he was starved for it and could never get enough. Leo loved it.
He loved how sensitive Cristiano’s neck was, how he gasped whenever Leo bit him around his belly button, how he moaned helplessly when Leo fucked him deep and hard. He loved the feeling of the soft skin and hard muscle under his hands, so strong and yet so pliant for him.
And he loved that he got to see Cristiano, usually so collected and in control, come apart as a result of Leo’s touch on him. The first time he had seen Cristiano orgasm, seen the pink tinge of his cheeks and listened to the way he cried out, his hands grasping the bed sheets helplessly, had been one of the hottest moments in Leo’s life, and he wanted to see it again, and again, and again, until he was sure he would never forget such an image.
And it became a regular thing. Over the weeks and the months that passed, Leo’s disorganized wardrobe had become manageable due to Cristiano’s efforts, and now he had a stack of Cristiano’s shirts and belts on the top shelf of his wardrobe, previously empty because Leo couldn’t reach it.
Their friends knew that something had shifted between them, but none of them bullied them into putting a name on it, for which they were both thankful. Though Leo had always enjoyed studying with Cristiano, and he certainly loves the time they spent in bed, he wasn’t sure about how he felt about Cristiano. He had started to care for him, and he loved the quiet moments when Geri was out of the house—which was almost always, since he preferred to spend his nights at Shakira’s place—, when Cristiano would cook for him in the kitchen dressed only in his boxers, not complaining when all Leo did was ogle his ass and his body, or the one time he had let Cristiano shave his legs after Leo had admitted to never even having considering it.
It was all lovely and Leo loved all of it. He just wasn’t sure if he loved Cristiano as well.
Leo was hit with a wave of shock when he was told that Cristiano was pretty much living with him.
Leo knew, in some part of his mind, that half of his closet, along with all the upper shelves, were now filled with Cristiano’s clothes, and that his bed sheets smelled of Cristiano’s perfume. It wasn’t rare for them to walk back together after classes or for dinner to be a home cooked meal for two, and he knows that he puts his head on Cristiano’s shoulder sometimes when they’re sitting side by side, talking to their friends, and that he greets Cristiano with a kiss every time he sees him.
However, though he was aware of all this things, he only realized it when Sergio pointed it out.
Leo had come to the kitchen with Kaká to help Sergio take all of the drinks to the living room, where they were celebrating Pilar’s birthday, and the conversation had steered towards Cristiano.
“Honestly, I have never seen him so carefree,” Kaká was saying.
“He’s still a control freak, though,” Sergio countered, and Leo couldn’t help but agree. Cristiano always arranged his clothes before they had sex and he was still the first one in the library every day. Leo also found out that Cristiano was in the habit of waking up a seven am sharp so he could go for a run in the mornings.
“Of course, but that’s just the way he operates,” Kaká says, not at all worried, gathering in a tray. “But I’m glad to see that you make him happy, Leo. He truly deserves it.” Kaká smiles at him, and though Leo wanted to find it infuriating that the man manages to always smile and always talk in a tone that conveyed the utmost honesty, Kaká is so damn kind that Leo can’t find it in him to dislike the man. It also helps that he’s also one of Cristiano’s best friends and Cristiano loves him dearly, and Leo could never dislike someone that makes Cristiano laugh.
Kaká grasps the tray with both hands and exits the kitchen, leaving Leo alone with Sergio. Though Leo hadn’t liked Sergio too much at first, finding him too loud and aggressive, they had somehow ended up becoming friends, or at least Leo thought so.
“Kaká’s right, you know?” Sergio asks him as he hands a few glasses to Leo. “I hope he makes you happy too. I mean,” Sergio says, a thoughtful look on his face, “he’s practically living with you, right? Isco said he hadn’t slept in his bedroom for almost two weeks now. I assume that means you’re more serious than we thought.”
Sergio’s words stay echoing in Leo’s mind as he follows Sergio back to the living room and settles next to Cristiano. He gives him a peck on the lips once he gets settled and covers Cristiano’s legs with his, which makes Cristiano beam and smile.
Sergio doesn’t have to spell it out for him for Leo to know that everyone in their group seems to be under the impression that they’re dating. He doesn’t mind it, exactly. He’s not bothered by them thinking that they’re committed or exclusive, but he’s afraid of Cristiano thinking that as well.
Leo can’t say he’s ever been in love. He’s had his fair share of celebrity crushes, found a lot of people attractive and had a small number of relationships that never lasted enough to receive that name. He’s also loved many people: he loves his family and most of his friends, and he doesn’t mind showing affection for them. But the love he feels for them is a slow paced thing, always there, living underneath his skin so it can surface whenever it is needed.
And that’s how he loves Cristiano. He doesn’t doubt that he has come to love him over time, and he certainly doesn’t mind having sex with him or sleeping next to him, even on the nights in which all they do is watch Netflix.
But to say that Cristiano puts butterflies in his stomach, that he makes Leo feel like the rest of the world doesn’t exist and all he can think about is Cristiano, that he ever felt for Cristiano the way falling in love feels, would be a lie.
It takes Leo longer than he would like to admit to talk to Cristiano. He knows he should start the conversation, put it all in the open so Cristiano can make a decision about how he feels with what Leo is willing to offer, but he’s too afraid of hurting Cristiano. He’s seen Cristiano angry and upset, but he’s never seen him sad. Somehow, though, he knows that such a sight would break his heart.
Anto seemed to know something was bothering him, because one day, as they walked across campus so they could get to their classes, she kissed him on the cheek and said, “Whatever is bothering you, you should talk to him.” When Leo looked at her perplexed, trying to figure out how she knew, she winked at him and smiled.
So a few nights later, as he and Cristiano lay in bed cuddling, enjoying the post-orgasmic bliss, skin still icky with sweat and come, Leo asks, “Are we dating?” He keeps his head tucked between Cristiano’s shoulder and neck so he doesn’t have to look at Cristiano.
“I don’t know,” Cristiano answers, voice soft and relaxed. “Are we?” His threading his hand slowly through Leo’s hair, which makes him want to just close his eyes and avoid this conversation altogether.
“Everyone seems to think so,” Leo offers, in place of a real answer.
Cris laughs. “What do you think?”
“I…” Leo starts, and then trails off. He can smell the sweat in Cristiano’s skin, a scent that has become so familiar to him. “I don’t think I’m dating material.”
“What do you mean?” And now, Leo can hear a frown in his voice, so he forces himself to get his face out of hiding and lays beside Cristiano. Cristiano turns to his side so they’re face to face, their legs tangled under Leo’s cheap sheets.
“It’s just…” He looks for Cristiano’s hand on the bed so he can lace his fingers. “Look, Cristiano, I don’t want you to take this the wrong way,” he says honestly, feeling his heart break when he sees the worry in Cristiano’s features. “I’ve never been in love before. I guess I don’t even know exactly what it feels like, but I know I never felt it. I don’t think I ever will. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, honestly, but that’s how I feel,” he says, letting out a bitter laugh. His heart is pounding in his chest, and he feels like crying, which makes him want to run away and never look back. “So, I guess what I’m trying to say is…” And he finally looks into Cristiano’s unreadable eyes. “I love you. I really do. I care deeply about you and I want you to be happy. I’m just not in love with you.” He knew he was being too blunt with his words, too aggressive, but it was easier to take of the Band-Aid with one, fast move, than to drag it on.
He has readied himself for Cristiano to not understand, for him to get up and leave or simply turn the other away and pretend Leo’s never said anything. So, it takes him by surprise when Cristiano hugs him instead, cradling his head against his chest. Leo feels some of the tension that he’s been gathering over the last few weeks drain away, leaving him exhausted.
“Thank you for being honest with me,” Cristiano mutter against his head, voice not higher than a whisper.
“Of course. You don’t need to thank me, Cris,” Leo answers. “I do love you, reaaly,” Leo repeats, for lack of something else to say. “And I’m really sorry-”
“Don’t be,” Cristiano interrupts before Leo can finish. He pushes slightly away and moves Leo’s head so they’re looking at each other’s faces, but Cristiano’s arms are still tight around Leo. “You shouldn’t have to apologize for how you feel. And,” And now he seems shy, a faint blush coming up on his cheeks, “Anto and Geri had talked to me already about how you’ve never been in love and that they thought… And Kun has been dropping some hints as well, and… Well, I guess I was ready for it.”
Leo shouldn’t feel surprised that his friends have talked about him to his not-boyfriend behind his back, but he is. He doesn’t mind it, though, because he knows they were just looking out for him, the same they have always done.
“Does that mean you’d be willing to, maybe, try to reach a compromise?” Leo asks, hopeful. “I really do like what we have going on here,” he adds, laughing, just so he can get Cristiano to laugh as well.
“I would,” Cristiano confirms. “And we’ll talk about this better in the morning, but I do need you to know that I’m already falling for you,” And before Leo can feel a pang of guilt, Cristiano continues, “But I don’t mind it. You’re a rather easy person to like. And if you’re not up to doing all that romantic shit like going on dates and dancing in the rain, I already do all of that regularly with James, as you already know,” Cristiano says, laughing at his antics with James. “But we’ll talk better in the morning, eh?”
“Ok,” Leo concedes, and proceeds to kiss Cristiano’s smile.
By the end of the following week, Cristiano is unofficially living with him, though everybody thinks he’s all moved in and Isco and Marcelo have started complaining about having to put an advertisement on his bedroom.
Leo loves to watch them bickering from his seat beside Cristiano, especially since he gets to watche the blush on Cristiano’s cheeks every time Leo laces their fingers on the table.