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A knock on his door brought Jungkook out of his trance. He was in the middle of stalking his G.C.F videos on youtube and scrolling through the comments. He voices a "come in" and pausing the video, he is greeted with a hazelnut-colored mop of hair peeking between the door and the doorframe.
"Jimin?".
Said man steps fully into the room, clutching his pillow to his chest. He looks cute like that. Jungkook doesn't think he'll ever get over how jimin is a weirdly enticing mix of cute and manly. God he doesn't want to get over it, he likes him exactly like that, the way Jimin's always been. He would never trade it.
"Can I sleep here tonight?", jimin smiles sheepishly as if he feels sorry for such request. He knows, Jungkook knows that Jimin loves being affectionate, knows that he needs it to keep going. And he never wants him to feel sorry for being the way he is.
"Of course, whenever you want. You don't have to ask".
Jungkook, -who was sitting right in the
middle of the bed over the blankets with his back against the headboard-, scoots sideways to leave enough room for the other. Jimin settles, getting under the blankets and lying on his side facing the younger man. Junkook smiles at him before going back to the video playing on his phone and resuming it.
Somehow Jungkook finds himself laying down with Jimin's chin digging into his chest. He has his left arm draped over Jimin's shoulder so he can hold his phone for both of them, his other arm behind his own head for support. They're so cosy like this, so comfortable. And they're not BTS's Jimin and Jungkook at that moment. They're just Park Jimin and Jeon Jungkook, just two men
existing, together, deep in love.' Jungkook's heart swells with emotions he doesn't think he has the ability to express without struggle. So he just shakily reaches to place a small peck on the crown of the older's head. Jimin nuzzles his nose into his chest in response before he reaches for the neglected phone and propping it up again. There's only one video left, one that Jungkook left purposefully for the end. They had laughed at
Taehyung's antics on the Osaka clip, and sang along all the songs in all the clips. Jimin
occasionally laughs and hides his face every time his silly expressions are on screen, pinching the younger's stomach playfully for uploading the "ugly footage", as Jimin likes to call it. They tried ignoring specific comments, the ones about the ships and so on. But it was impossible not to
once they played the G.C.F in Tokyo. And with jimin now having control over the phone, he made sure to read all of them, even opening the replies and going through each single one of them.
Jungkook whined for him to stop, tried to close the video. But Jimin was determined, and Jungkook didn't want him to read those comments. Even among the endless sea of nice fans loving the video or appreciating Jimin or gushing over Jungkook's filming and editing, there was another endless sea of hate towards them, people cussing each other out for their opinions, and people cussing Jimin or Jungkook, people forgetting there were 7 members of BTS and blatantly stating one is better than the other. Jungkook didn't want Jimin to see those, didn't want him to blame himself. Jimin was always the first affected by the harsh comments left for them, and the younger has made it his goal in life to remind Jimin of how amazing of a person he is, how he
matters to thousands and millions other people, how he matters the most to Jungkook himself.
At some point Jimin lets Jungkook grab a hold of the phone without putting an ounce of struggle like he did mere seconds ago and turns to the other side, facing away from him.
"You should get ready to bed, Jungkook. It's late."
His voice was so collected, so deep and monotoned and proffessional, as if he was talking to a camera and not his boyfriend. And it pierced through the younger like a steel knife, leaving a burning pain in its wake. The dark-haired man looked back to the phone and saw the comment
jimin was reading. It was a response to a fan gushing over how jungkook was whipped for jimin in all his elements, and the response was harsh. It was outright ridiculiously insane that he had to read it twice to make sure he was seeing right. How could someone say things like that, he didn't
understand. Of course as an idol in a band he knew of fanservice and tried his best. It was part of his job anyways, be it fanservice with jin, jimin, taehyung. He knew of the wars between shippers, it was normal. But to take it this far, by saying that jimin wasn't lovable and that jungkook wouldn't love someone as disgusting as Jimin, by saying that taehyung was better. Who were they to judge?Who were they to decide who Jungkook could or would love. He loved all of the members the same. They were his family, he knew them before he even fully realised what family meant. They practically raised him for fuck's sake, he was just a teenager when they
debuted. And now, now he has Jimin. Jimin who now means a different family than he's meant before. Jimin who loved with his all, gave everything into whatever he does, who holds Jungkook to his chest when the latter feels lost. Jungkook finds himself back again with Jimin.And He realises he can't physically say all of that, maybe someday, when they really settle down and Jungkook has matured enough to put his whirlwind of bursting love for the elder into words
without messing up.
He feels the older shift in the bed, scooting to the edge and away from him. He puts the phone away, placing a hand on Jimin's shoulder and feels him tense up under his fingertips.
"Jimin?"
"It's late Jungkook. You need to get some sleep."
"Not until you talk to me. Why are you so far away." It wasn't a question and they both knew it. Jimin
sighs heavily, stubbornly holding his ground. Jugkook has to put a hell of a physical effort to have him on his back. When he does, the older refuses to look at him, his head cast sideways and away.
"Love", Jungkook starts, voice gentle and soothing," look at me".
He hooks his finger under the
older's chin, silently urging him to meet his eyes without putting force into the action. Jimin gives in, sighing and letting the younger guide his head, and the latter is unsurprisingly met with red
eyes, brimmed with unshed tears.
"Oh,love."
Jungkook sighs out in the space between them, cradling Jimin's head and pulling him into his embrace; and Jimin crumbles. Tears are falling freely and wetting the younger's shirt. His hands are tightly fisting the fabric on his back and Jungook squeezes him tighter every time his fists tighten. The dark-haired man softly rocks them, trying to calm the man in his arms, shushing him and whispering sweetsnothings into his hair between the soft assuring pecks he places there. Jimin feels pathetic to be crying like this over something so stupid. But he can't help himself when people who call themselves their fans keep saying rude comments like that. They don't even know that Jungkook and himself are dating yet. Still, they keep cussing at everyone who speculates or supports that possibility. All hope of them ever coming clean in the far future shatters to pieces. He can't stop his mind from thinking about those dark thoughts. He knows they younger loves him as much as he does. He knows he's just being paranoid and stupid. But he can't help it, and Jungkook knows that too.
"Jimin, baby, it's okay..sshhhh..you're okay. I'm here, I'm with you baby, will always be with you."
Jungkook murmurs softly, kissing his hair again and again. It only makes him cry harder. And when he finally manages to calm down, he pulls back to look at his boyfriend. His face is red, and with a gasp Jimin realises that he's been crying with him the whole time. He cups the younger's
cheeks in his hand, thumb carressing the path his dried tears have left in their wake.
"Jungkookie", a small hiccup -aftermath of his crying session-escapes his throat, "I'm sorry", he adds quietly.
"No,love don't apologize. It's why we're together, so we can let go of everything in each other's arms." Jungkook firmly states.
His hands move to cup either side of the older's neck. His thumbs are stroking back and forth right under his jaw. It has the desired effect, as Jimin deflates and his shoulders drop, the tension leaving them completely.
"Maybe they're right-". Jimin starts, only to be cut off.
"No, Jimin. They aren't. Don't you dare start with all that 'you deserve a lot better than me'. You know it's not true. You're amazing, better than all those men in novels. You're the best to me."
Jungkook's tone is still firm, but his voice shakes with the emotions that fight to tumble out of his lips, only to stay at the back of his throat for lack of vocabulary to match their intensity.
"But you DO! I'm a mess of insecurities and self-doubt. I'm probably only weighting you down being emotional and cranky most of the time."
The older sighs, placing his hands on his boyfriend's shoulder and pushing down any retort the other has.
"But. I know that's just me thinking
irrationally. I know Guk, trust me. And I can't help but love you more because you chose to be with me, like this. I'm forever grateful to have you love me back, and to help me love myself better and.. And I'm sorry I keep being insecure."
The last words escape him in a small voice. He feels the lump buiding up in his throat
and he forcefully swallows it down. This is Jungkook he's talking to and his filter stopped working a long time ago; a telltale sign of how comfortable he got around him.
"Jiminie, fuck I don't want you to ever say sorry for who you are. I've probably already said this like a thousand times. You are not a burden. I would never ever find your feelings annoying. You mean too much to me, every little part of you. okay, my dove?"
Jungkook hums, his thumbs never
stopped rubbing across his jaw.
The light-haired man can't help the chuckle that escapes him.
"You've gotten quite creative with the pet names. Where'd you catch this dove thing?", he teases.
He really can't help himself, not with the way the raven-haired leans to nose at his cheek in an attempt to cover his embarrassment.
"Well excuse me if I'm trying to be the best mate in the world by providing that little kink of yours."
Now, this is them, all loving and gross one moment, and childish banter the other. They went through so much together, even before they were romantically involved. They never really changed, probably got older (and a lot more mature, talking everything over instead of running away from their emotions.), and HELLA GROSSLY IN LOVE (Taehyung's words). But they were still them, two boys still learning the secrets of life, together.
"Mate", jimin echoes, "I like the sound of that."
"I'll be whoever you want me to be dove, your boyfriend, lover, partner, other half, your mate. Anything you want you shall get." Jungkook says dreamily.
"God I'm in love with a sappy idiot." Jimin releases a hearty laugh.
It makes the younger man smile
fondly. There will never be a day he will tire of that stupidly cute sound.
"At least you said you love the sappy idiot. I don't know what I'd do otherwise." Jungkook teases him back.
They fall into a fit of giggles, occasionnally letting out louder laughs as they thrash on the bed tickling each other. Eventually they stop to take a much needed breath. They are both lying on their backs, panting. Jimin turns to Jungkook, throwing his arm and leg around him and trapping him agaisnt his body.
"Hey baby, I'll just go wash up real quick and get ready for bed."
The light-haired man whines in protest, tightening his limbs around him to voice his displeasure.
"Don't wannaa."
The younger laughs in response at his cute antics. He just lifts himself up and hoists the other against his front, to which Jimin wraps his limbs around his torso and hums in satisfaction.
"God, so clingly."
"Guk. Shut up."
"Your dom is showing baby."
"your brat is showing sweetie."
Jimin lifts his head from where hes tuffed it into his neck to give
him a mock-innocent smile.
He is placed on the laundry machine next to the sink. And he watches as the younger takes off the remainders of his make-up. Jimin's legs are dangling and it makes him feel like a little kid.
Jungkook turns to him and sees the awestruck expression on his face.
"what?"
he mumbles, mouth full of toothpaste foam as he steps to stand between his legs.
The older feels oddly domestic like this, his heart is about to burst.
"Nothing, I just love you lots you know."
Jungkook lets a gurgled laugh escape him. He's just a man in love alright, cut him some slack.
Taehyung passes by the bathroom and stops in his tracks, eyeing the two men.
"Seokjin hyung! Kookie and jiminie are being weird again."
"Shut up tae. Let us be alright. It's been so long."
"wow Jiminie I didn't know you were the horny one."
Taehyung ducks down as a slipper comes
barreling towards him and runs down the hall, laughing.
"Are you?" Jungkook asks as he rinses the foam away.
Jimin hums in question.
"Horny I mean."
"My body is too exhausted baby, I wouldn't be surprised if I couldn't get hard even in my horniest state."He looks at him apologitically, the idea of rejecting his boyfriend starts drowning him with guilt.
His thoughts are interrupted when he hears the other's relieved chuckle.
"Good because I'm equally fucked out. I even started thinking if I was even able to blow you."
"Wow soo tired but still could carry me around like I weigh nothing." Jimin teases, but he understands.
Sex always consumes them, even more than endless hours of schedules .It's always
intense. And they drag it out as much as they can, testing a whole new level of stamina in the both of them.
"I workout specifically to carry you whenever baby."
"Muscle pig." The older retorts as Jungkook lifts him up again and maneuvers them down the hall back to his room.
"This muscle pig is feeding your strength kink. You better stop complaining."
"I'm not the only one though. You love it when I handle you too."
"Mmmmm true. I love when you go all dom on me baby."
"I TOTS DID NOT NEED TO KNOW THAT YOU ASSHOLES!"
Hoseok's scandalised face meets them as they pass him from where he's standing at the door of his and taehyung's room.
"STOP LAUGHING YOU JERKS"
"We're young adults hyung! of course we would be sexually active." Jungkook responds, keeping his laughter at bay.
"Please don't fuck on the couch, now that the two of you are going all the way. GOD, I can't believe I'm thinking about you two going at it. Is this why families don't talk about sex?It must be, fuck this is gross, eww. I need Jin hyung's advise."
Hoseok starts towards the eldest's room. The two of them shrug, finally reaching the room and settling on bed.
" I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! COULDN'T YOU HAVE LOCKED THE DOOR NAMJOON! FIRST JUNGKOOK AND JIMIN AND NOW YOU!!!"
The two burst into laughter. Jungkook settles Jimin down while he changes into his pyjamas (read: takes off almost all of his clothing).
"Say guk, do you think the guys would find it funny if we pretended to have sex?" The older
whispers once they're both comfortably tucked in bed.
Jungkook searches his eyes in the dark,
before tucking himself back into Jimin's neck.
"I don't know, why?want them to hear me screaming your name while you fuck me?"
The younger teases, darting his tongue out to lightly lick at his adam apple.
"Nah. Want them to hear how good that tongue fucks my ass."
"HYUNG!" Jungkook cries out, laughing after the embarrassment goes away.
"wow now it's hyung. I really don't need the unnecessary reminder of us fucking when you call me that on screen." Jimin sighs.
"would you rather I call you baby boy?"
Jungkook smirks at the groan the older lets out at his traitorous twitchinng dick.
"Your dick seems interested though."
The light-haired man hits him on the back of his head playfully, before tightening his arms around him. Jungkook nuzzles deeper into his neck.
"Sleep Guk."
"Trying. Goodnight my dove."
"I'm just going to ignore that. G'night baby."