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Kirishima walked into the apartment with a heavy carton of beers hoisted up on his shoulder. He placed the box down on the table with a dull thump.
"Got the drinks, you guys ready to go?" He asked his friends, who were lounging across the old sofa.
"Ashido's still putting her make-up on," Sero replied.
"I'll be 5 minutes, Kiri!" Ashido called from the bathroom. Kirishima heard Bakugou mutter something under his breath along the lines of 'can't fix ugly'.
"While we're waiting let's talk about how sexy Kirishima looked carrying that carton," Kaminari said.
Bakugou almost choked on his own spit. "What the fuck!"
"What? Like you didn't notice the gun show that just went on over there," Kaminari replied, gesturing to where Kirishima was standing. "He's so strong, picking up the heavy box for us with his big muscles~"
"It's not that heavy, dude. You could pick it up," Kirishima said nonchalantly, despite the fact the tips of his ears were turning pink.
Kaminari, who was done embarrassing Kirishima and was now more focused on pissing off Bakugou, dramatically threw his head back with his hand over his forehead. "What a hunk! Take me now!"
"Keep it in your fucking pants, Drooly! He's taken!" Bakugou shouted, taking the bait.
"You have to learn to share, Baku-bro," Sero teased. "Show us the gun show, Kiri!"
"Gun show! Gun show! Gun show!" Kaminari started to chant. Sero quickly joined in, as well as Ashido, who was still in the bathroom.
"I hate you all," Kirishima mumbled into the hand on his face.
"Stop thirsting over my husband, idiots!" Bakugou cried.
The chanting stopped very suddenly.
Kaminari turned to Bakugou, shit-eating grin in place. "Did you just call Kiri your husband?"
He was expecting Bakugou to blow up - to suddenly realise his slip up and turn red with rage and embarrassment. They all were. Ashido even popped her head out of the bathroom door to see what would happen next. Accidentally calling your boyfriend your husband? Bakugou must be mortified.
But he wasn't.
He frowned at Kaminari. "Yeah? Cos he fucking is?"
Kaminari and Sero squinted at their friend in confusion, and Ashido stepped into the living room with only half her face on.
They turned to Kirishima, who was looking at them confused. "Why are you guys-" He was hit with a sudden realisation, slapping himself in the forehead. "Did we not tell you guys we got married?"
"You what!?" The three shouted.
"You guys got married!?" Ashido screeched.
"Wha- What the fuck? What the fuck?" Sero gaped. He looked back and forth between Bakugou, who had the most smug grin on his face, to Kirishima, who looked like he was holding back laughter. "What the fuck?"
"Sorry," Kirishima chuckled as he sat down on the arm of Bakugou's chair. "We forgot to say."
Kaminari looked as though he was trying to do long division in his head. "You guys are married and you just 'forgot to say'? What the hell!"
"How long ago was all of this?" Sero asked.
"Um," Kirishima looked to Bakugou, then back to his friends. "A month ago?"
"What?"
"Alright, I've already texted Kyouka that we're gonna be late. Answers. Now," demanded Ashido. She sat down on the floor at Sero's feet and crossed her arms.
"Yeah! When? Where? Why?" Kaminari asked. "As in - why didn't you tell us?"
"I dunno, we just kinda did it and—" Kirishima began. He was quickly cut off by three confused and slightly peeved voices throwing questions at him.
"Oi! You wanna hear what happened or not? Shut the fuck up and listen!" Bakugou snapped. Kirishima pushed at his head playfully and started telling the story.
____________
When Bakugou walked into his apartment after coming home from work, there was smoke everywhere. "What the fuck," he coughed as the smoke alarm starting ringing. "Ei what did you do?"
"One second!" Kirishima called from the kitchen.
Bakugou ran in - the smoke was much thicker in the kitchen. On the stove top was a pot, the contents of which was wrapped in tall, red flames. Kirishima smiled and waved at Bakugou before he lifted up a fire extinguisher and smothered the large flames.
"Should I even fucking ask?" Grumbled Bakugou once the fire was out.
"I was trying to make us dinner," Kirishima winced.
The smoke alarm was still blaring through the apartment, and between its high pitched squeal and Kirishima's shenanigans, Bakugou was sure he would go insane in less than a minute.
He grabbed a chair to stand on, ripped the smoke alarm out of the ceiling, threw it onto the ground, then jumped on it for good measure.
"I think you killed it," Kirishima said.
"And you killed dinner, we're even," Bakugou replied.
"You're not mad, are you?"
"I feel like I should be, but after living with you for as long as I have, I've become desensitised to domestic disasters," he said, kicking the smashed smoke alarm into the corner. "I'm fucking tired and hungry and dying from smoke inhalation."
"Sorry," Kirishima said as Bakugou wrapped his arms around him and lay his head on his shoulder. "The smoke alarm doesn't call the fire department, does it?"
"You fucking wish it does," Bakugou mumbled into his neck.
Kirishima balked. "What does that mean?"
"You'd love to have some sexy firemen come save you."
"Wha- no," Kirishima spluttered, face already turning red.
"Don't be fucking coy, I know you," Bakugou grunted.
"I am offended that you think I have a sexy fireman fantasy, I- ah- Katsuki no!" Kirishima squeaked as Bakugou grabbed him around the waist and hoisted him up, slinging his body over his shoulder.
"Let's go I'm starving," Bakugou said, carrying his boyfriend fireman style.
"Katsuki put me down I'm too heavy for you!" Kirishima shouted. Bakugou ignored him as he grabbed their coats and walked out the door. "Katsuki! You're gonna hurt yourself!"
"No I'm not I'm fucking strong," Bakugou growled.
Kirishima rolled his eyes and gave in. He looked down. "Got a nice ass, too."
"Shut up."
"It was a compliment! Do you not know what a compliment is?" He looked up and saw their old neighbour giving him a funny look. He blushed; he hadn't realised Bakugou had carried him all the way down the hall. "Hello, Mrs. Sawamura!"
"Hello, Kirishima," the old woman said. She opened up her own door and walked inside. "Don't worry, dear, it was just the gays across the hall again."
---
After getting burgers at a small store, they walked to the local park to eat. The grass was a little damp, but Kirishima didn't seem fazed by it, so Bakugou sat down too. It was already dark, the only light around was a lamppost nearby. The park was peaceful and quiet.
"Are you coming to Iida's birthday on Sunday?" Kirishima asked.
"Don't talk with your mouth full," Bakugou replied.
"Answer the question."
"Do I have a choice?"
"Nope, you're definitely coming," Kirishima said with a little smile. "I just think it's nice to ask."
Bakugou groaned loudly, and Kirishima just laughed. He bit back into his burger, scoffing it down.
"Would you fucking slow down? You eat like it's your last day on Earth," Bakugou scowled. He grabbed Kirishima's arm, pulling the half-demolished burger away from his mouth.
"It's yummy," Kirishima mumbled over a mouthful of food.
Bakugou shook his head. "You've got mayonnaise on you," he tutted, swiping the rogue blob of mayo off of his boyfriend's cheek with his thumb. It was like he was dating a toddler.
"You look after me," Kirishima sang with a smile.
"Cos otherwise you'd be fucking dead," he replied. He licked the mayo off of his thumb.
"That was mine," Kirishima commented.
"Maybe if you didn't miss your mouth so much you could have had it."
They finished eating in silence, and Kirishima rested his head on Bakugou's shoulder. They had been dating for years now, but Bakugou still felt warm and fuzzy whenever Kirishima was so gentle and touched him so casually. He would never tell him that though.
Bakugou watched his boyfriend as he absentmindedly hummed a song to himself. Kirishima grabbed Bakugou's hand and started tracing patterns over his palm as he sang quietly.
Bakugou had never felt such a sudden surge of love for Kirishima as he did at that moment. He wanted to hug him so tight that he squeezed the life out of him, like the only way to deal with this random burst of affection was to squish Kirishima.
He didn't do that though. He just watched Kirishima play with his hand, and queitly made a pretty important decision.
Bakugou decided right then and there that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Kirishima. Even though there was a huge smoking mess in his kitchen because of him, Bakugou realised that he couldn't see a future without the silly redhead.
"Do you want to get married?" He asked suddenly.
"Hm? Yeah, someday," Kirishima replied, mistaking the question for casual conversation.
"No, I mean– now. Do you want to get married now?"
Kirishima sat up. He stared at Bakugou in shock, blinking a couple of times before he answered.
"Right now?" He asked.
"Right now," Bakugou replied.
"Wha– I– What brought on this?"
"I just want to marry you," Bakugou said. "It's cold and my ass is wet and I'm so fucking tired, but at the same time all I want to do is be here with you and listen to your voice. I can't fucking imagine not being with you. I think it's been that way for a while now."
Kirishima was starting to tear up. He cupped Bakugou's face in his hands and kissed him. "I want to be with you, too," he said quietly. "I love you so much, but– I you sure you want to get married?"
Bakugou nodded. "I don't half-ass anything, I'm not gonna half-ass dating you."
Kirishima laughed and kissed him again. He stood up. "You have to ask properly, then."
Bakugou rolled his eyes, but smiled and did as Kirishima wanted. He got down on one knee and grabbed Kirishima's hand with both of his. "Eijirou."
"Katsuki," said Kirishima.
"You drive me fucking crazy."
He laughed.
"You almost burnt down the kitchen today."
"Mm-hm."
"But I love you."
"I love you too."
Bakugou squeezed his hand. "So will you please fucking marry me?"
Kirishima laughed again. "Well since you said please." Bakugou jumped up and he threw his arms around him. "Yes I will!"
Bakugou punched the air and kissed him. "Okay let's go!" He shouted once they parted, running out of the park, pulling Kirishima behind him.
"Let's get married!" Kirishima hollered.
---
After a tiny ceremony with a stranger as the witness, signing documents and a quick celebration drink at the bar, they made it back to their apartment in one piece, silly with happiness.
Kirishima scooped Bakugou up in his arms and kissed him on the cheek. "You wanna know what my first promise to you as your husband is?" He asked, walking them to the bedroom.
"What?" Bakugou replied, deciding not to argue about being carried.
"I promise to clean up the kitchen first thing tomorrow," Kirishima declared.
Bakugou snorted. "Fucking romantic."
Kirishima plopped Bakugou down on the bed and flopped down next to him. He wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling him closer, staring into his eyes.
"I love you, Katsuki."
"I love you too, shithead."
Kirishima hit him with a pillow.
_____________
Their friends stared at them, wide-eyed. Kirishima grinned happily and gave Bakugou a kiss on the cheek.
"Bakugou!" Ashido cried. "That's so cute and romantic!"
"I didn't know you had it in you," Sero said. He just smiled when Bakugou flipped him off.
"I would still like to know why you didn't tell us," Kaminari said.
"We're not kidding - we literally fucking forgot to say," said Bakugou.
"That's so dumb, you guys are perfect for each other," Ashido smiled. "You should have an actual wedding though! It'd be so beautiful!"
"Yeah! I'm happy for you guys but I feel I've been robbed of Best Man-ness! Have a wedding!" Kaminari cried, waving his arms around.
"We're already married, I'm not putting on a fucking show for the sake of you idiots," grunted Bakugou.
"It's not about putting on a show, it's about showing your commitment to each other and celebrating with your friends and family!" Ashido explained passionately.
"You guys don't even have rings," Sero pointed out. "We're not saying you need all of this, but it might be nice."
"But you definitely need a wedding," said Ashido.
Bakugou looked to Kirishima.
"Rings would be nice," he said.
A small smile curled on Bakugou's lips. "Yeah?"
Kirishima smiled and knodded.
"Aw, you guys are gonna make me cry and ruin my make-up!" Ashido whined. She jumped forward and gave the two a hug, practically sitting in Bakugou's lap. She jumped up and clapped her hands excitedly. "Ooh! I can't wait! I'll plan it. It's gonna be the cutest wedding!" She squealed.
Kirishima tried to tell her they hadn't fully agreed to having a wedding yet, but she was already running off. He supposed they didn't really have a choice.
A wedding would be nice, sure, but both Kirishima and Bakugou would still prefer their actual wedding night, when they ate junk food and ran through the park. They never were ones for tradition, after all.