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For all that he’s had his mokuton ability for years, Yamato is painfully aware that it doesn’t truly belong to him. As a result, there are some parts of the skill that he simply struggles to control. He will never be able to create on the scale of Hashirama. Although he can encourage living trees to grow almost unthinkingly, his own attempts at creating them from nothing always look a bit off, just barely too manufactured to be believable upon close inspection. Those difficulties Yamato can live with.
More problematic, though, is that even after years of training, whenever he experiences a particularly strong or unexpected emotion Yamato just – loses control.
The first time Kakashi kisses him, Yamato opens his eyes to find that every tree in the training ground is in full bloom, creating a canopy of petals overhead. Kakashi, bemused, kisses him again and watches in awe as flowers bloom from Yamato’s skin.
Never one to let an opportunity to get a rise out of Yamato pass him by, Kakashi does his best to fluster his partner at every chance he gets after that. He grabs Yamato’s ass while they’re shopping and suddenly the produce section looks like the Yamanaka flower shop. In the middle of a jounin meeting Kakashi starts whispering an absolutely filthy passage of the latest Icha Icha in his ear and watches with delight as Yamato flushes bright red and stiffens, torso quite literally turned to wood.
(He sleeps on the couch for a week after that particular stunt, although Yamato suspects that he has not learned any lessons.)
It happens less, now – they’ve been together long enough that Kakashi is less able to take Yamato by surprise, and Kakashi is also less interested in antagonizing him now that the novelty has worn off.
Even so, Yamato is not immune to being caught off guard, and Kakashi has never quite given up his favorite pastime of causing trouble his partner.
They’re returning from a mission with Team 7 when his problems begin.
Naruto and Sakura are berating Sai for his latest social misstep – Yamato’s not exactly sure what he’s done this time but based on Sakura’s exasperation he assumes it’s related to another unsuccessful interaction with Ino – when Kakashi is suddenly pressed up against him.
“Tenzō,” he murmurs, mouth brushing against Yamato’s ear through his mask, “you can never wear these pants on a mission again. How am I supposed to focus on leading the team when you’re running in front of me looking like that?”
Yamato can feel his face turning red, recognizes the familiar feeling of a spike in mokuton chakra. But the kids are right there, and although he and Kakashi have talked about how to tell them about their relationship, he is certainly not about to have them find out like this.
“Kakashi—” he mutters darkly, hoping his tone will deter him, but Kakashi keeps talking.
“Gods, you probably don’t even realize how good you look, do you?” Yamato can feel himself losing control of the mokuton, the combination of embarrassment and, even worse, arousal overwhelming him, but he tries to clamp down on it, channeling all of that wild mokuton energy into himself – Kakashi is just trying to get a rise out of him and he will not give him the satisfaction. “When we get home, Tenzō, I’m going to—”
Suddenly there’s a pressure in Yamato’s chest, like something’s been lodged in it, and he clears his throat, cutting Kakashi off. Whatever it is, it burns, and then all of a sudden he’s coughing and he can’t stop, can’t catch his breath around the object in his throat.
Kakashi’s expression changes from leering to concerned as he grabs Yamato’s shoulder, rubbing his back. He can hear the kids rushing over too, previous argument forgotten in their concern, and then he’s choking out one final cough and the thing, whatever it was, is dislodged from his throat and falls to the ground with a soft, wet noise.
Kakashi grabs him by both shoulders as Yamato wipes his mouth with the back of his hand.
“Tenzō?” he says, visible eye wide, “are you alright?”
Yamato just nods, confused. “I’m fine – just surprised me.”
Kakashi lets out a relieved breath and loosens his grip on Yamato’s shoulders. Belatedly, he realizes that the youngest members of Team 7 have fallen unusually silent.
“Sorry, everyone, I don’t know what that was—”
He stops abruptly when he turns to see them, all three studying something on the ground intently. It’s a flower, Yamato, realizes, a fully formed gardenia blossom. Naruto looks confused, and Sai’s face is expressionless as usual, but Sakura – Sakura looks horrified.
“Captain Yamato,” she whispers, face pale, “why didn’t you tell us?”
“Uh – I didn’t – I didn’t think there was anything to tell,” he stammers out, unsure what she means.
“But you could die,” she wails suddenly, turning on him, “I’ve never read any studies of hanahaki disease but if it’s anything like the stories it’s serious, you should have told us! Tsunade needs to know, as soon as we get back.”
“Disease? What disease?” Naruto’s voice is urgent and Yamato can feel his tenuous control of the situation slipping away – Team 7 is reliable in that respect if nothing else.
Sakura’s tone becomes that of a lecturer. “Hanahaki disease – when someone has a powerful, unrequited love, flowers bloom in their chest and they have to cough them up. It’s usually petals, if Captain Yamato is coughing up fully-formed flowers like this it’s already an advanced stage of the disease.”
Finally, Yamato understands her stricken expression. “Hanahaki – you can’t seriously believe it’s real, you’re a medic-nin. It’s a fictional disease, Sakura, surely there haven’t been any documented cases of it really existing,” he says, trying to placate her.
“I don’t know of any documented cases, but what else could it be?” she argues, mind made up.
And that’s when Yamato realizes he’s trapped. He can’t exactly tell her the truth, after all – ‘sorry, guys, but I promise I’m not sick, your sensei was just whispering filthy things in my ear’ is hardly fitting with the authoritative presence of a team captain, and he’d be too embarrassed to say it out loud anyways.
Beside him, Kakashi has turned away to face the forest with a pensive expression, but Yamato suspects it’s only a cover for him to calm down enough to speak to the team without laughing.
Sakura evidently takes his silence as begrudging agreement. “See?” she insists, “that’s the only possibility.”
Besides her, Naruto looks devastated. “Captain Yamato,” he starts, “that’s so SAD – please don’t die! We’ll help you find your love so you’re cured, okay? You can count on us!”
That, Yamato thinks, is exactly what he’s afraid of.
“Naruto, I’m sure you won’t need to—” he starts, trying desperately to regain control of the situation, but Sai cuts him off.
“No, Captain, if this is truly the disease Sakura speaks of we need to take it seriously,” he says, expression solemn. “Please, let us do this.”
Kakashi, evidently having regained control of his snickering, takes the opportunity to step in. “I think that’s a great idea, you three. I’ve known Ten—Captain Yamato for a long time and he never takes his health seriously. If this is as grave a matter as Sakura says, your new mission once we get back should be to help him out.”
Yamato glares at his partner – he’s one to talk about taking health issues seriously, honestly – but Kakashi looks convincingly concerned and Team 7 buys it hook, line, and sinker.
“Of course! We’ll do our best, Kakashi-sensei!” they chime, united around their new cause.
“Good,” Kakashi says, ruffling their hair. “Now let’s get back to town. Yamato, you’d better let me carry you back just in case something else happens.”
Yamato tries to protest, but the kids will hear nothing of it, and Kakashi ignores his dark glare as he hoists Yamato on to his back.
“Kakashi,” he hisses under his breath as they run back to town, “forget sleeping on the couch. I am going to murder you.”
Kakashi doesn’t say anything, but Yamato can feel his shoulders shaking with silent laughter. It only strengthens his resolve.
--
They’re endearingly reluctant to leave Yamato’s side once they make it back to town, but eventually Kakashi is able to placate Team 7 into leaving them alone with a promise that he will personally make sure Yamato is examined by Tsunade in the morning.
Yamato’s chopping vegetables for their dinner when Kakashi brings it up again.
“You scared me today, Tenzō,” he says, wrapping his arms around Yamato from behind. Yamato starts, and a few leaves sprout from the cutting board. Kakashi lets out a soft huff of laughter, air puffing against Yamato’s neck.
“I know. I’m sorry I worried you – although I don’t know why I’m apologizing, they seriously think I'm going to die and it's definitely all your fault.” He can feel Kakashi grin into his shoulder at that, unrepentant and seemingly unconcerned by the emotional trauma he may or may not be inflicting on the rest of the team.
“Really, though, you’re alright?” Kakashi’s not usually so sweet, Yamato muses, he must have really been worried.
“Promise,” he replies. “It just took me by surprise, is all. It didn’t even hurt.”
“Good,” Kakashi says, squeezing him, “that’s good.”
He’d be touched by the gesture, but there’s a note to Kakashi’s voice that sounds suspect, somehow, and Yamato turns to better see his face.
“Kakashi,” he starts, “what are you thinking about?”
“Nothing,” Kakashi replies, and he’s the picture of innocence except for how he’s not quite meeting Yamato’s eyes. “Really, Tenzō, so suspicious. Are you done with those vegetables? The soup’s ready for them.”
Yamato gives him one long, hard look, before relenting and surrendering his freshly-chopped vegetables. Whatever it is Kakashi’s scheming, he’s obviously not going to give up any details. Reluctantly, Yamato lets the matter drop.
--
True to his word – and because if they don’t go Sakura will find out and there will be consequences – Kakashi makes it a point to accompany Yamato to Tsunade's office the next morning.
Technically it's just a mission debrief, but once they've recounted the details of their team's excursion Tsunade holds up a hand before they can leave.
"Yamato. Kakashi. Would either of you care to explain why my apprentice is convinced that her beloved captain could waste away from a broken heart at any moment? You both look perfectly fine.”
“Er—” Yamato begins, “she may have jumped to some conclusions based on… an incident that occurred on the mission.”
Kakashi quirks an eyebrow and Yamato knows he’s being laughed at. “What Tenzō means to say, Hokage-sama, is that he coughed up a flower yesterday, and Sakura’s been reading a lot of cliché romances lately.”
“You really did cough up a flower? Was it your mokuton again?” Tsunade questions, before bursting into peals of laughter at Yamato’s responding nod. “Well, you’d better let me look at your throat, then, just in case. You’ve never made things easy on yourself, Yamato. What happened?”
Yamato doesn’t say anything as he steps forward for an exam, but between his rapidly heating face and Kakashi’s self-satisfied expression besides him, he knows Tsunade has all the answer she needs.
“So, let me get this straight,” she says, trying and failing to keep her face blank. “You’ve let three of our most promising young shinobi become convinced that Yamato is dying of a fictional disease rather than just telling them Kakashi can’t keep it in his pants for one mission?”
“Well, when you put it like that… yes,” Kakashi admits, shrugging his shoulders and looking completely unashamed. Yamato wants to strangle him. Tsunade just snorts.
“The two of you are impossible,” she says, waving them away. “Your throat looks fine, Yamato. Now, both of you get out of my office so I can try to figure out what happened to my supposedly elite shinobi force.”
--
He’ll just have to tell them, Yamato decides. It might be awkward, and uncomfortable, but he’s an adult, and he can suck it up. It feels wrong that he should be the one who has to do this when really, it is all Kakashi’s fault, but he’s used to the injustice of cleaning up after Kakashi by now.
He would have appreciated a moment to actually think about what he was going to say, but evidently that’s too much to ask for, because they’ve barely made it out of Hokage Tower when Yamato hears a yell from down the street.
“Captain Yamato! What did the old lady say? Are you dying?” Naruto is running towards them, Sakura and Sai hot on his heels.
Yamato sighs. So much for his quiet afternoon.
“Ino said that the flower from yesterday means ‘secret love,’ Captain,” Sakura is saying, voice serious as ever. “So it must be that you’ve got an unrequited love. But don’t worry, we’ll help bring you together!”
Yamato tries to imagine what that help might look like and struggles to suppress a shudder. He looks to Kakashi for help but, as usual, he’s feigning interest in one of his damn books and won’t meet Yamato’s gaze.
“I don’t know about the rest of you,” Yamato starts, trying to buy some time, “but I’m starving – how about we go talk at Ichiraku’s?”
--
Yamato and Kakashi trail a few feet behind the kids, walking in comfortable silence and letting the sound of friendly bickering wash over them. Suddenly, Kakashi is a little too close to be casual, wrapping his arm around Yamato’s waist.
“I really am glad you’re alright, Tenzō,” he murmurs, breath ghosting over Yamato’s ear.
“Kakashi, they are right there—” Yamato starts, but then Kakashi’s tugged his mask down, lightning-quick, and is pressing a gentle kiss to Yamato’s cheek. It’s sweet (suspiciously so, a less charitable part of Yamato thinks) and uncharacteristically public, for Kakashi, but the effect is the same either way. Yamato feels his face heat and immediately clamps down on the mokuton, sending up a silent prayer to Hashirama that the loss of control will at least be subtle.
It’s no use, though – just as he had the day before, Yamato feels the pressure in his chest and knows what is about to happen. He shoots a wounded look at Kakashi, who’s pulled his mask back up and is doing his best impression of a person who isn’t responsible for Yamato’s current strife, and softly clears his throat.
When that fails, he accepts the inevitable and coughs, harsher this time. He can feel the flower dislodge in his throat and tries to subtly spit it out into his hand, hoping the younger members of Team 7 hasn’t noticed.
They have, of course.
“Show us,” Sakura insists, frowning at him. Yamato is struck with the sudden, childish urge to hide his hand behind his back and refuse. That would be a futile battle, though, so he reluctantly holds out his palm to reveal another flower, this time a white carnation.
“Another fully-formed flower,” Sai muses, tapping his chin as he thinks. “From everything I’ve read that means you’re in the later stages of the disease, Captain.”
Naruto looks near-inconsolable. “Why won’t you just tell us who it is? That way we could help you!”
Sakura looks at him, assessing. “You know, in some cases the disease flares up when you’re near the object of your affections.”
Yamato swallows nervously, unsure of what conclusions she could be jumping to now. Whatever they are, she doesn’t share them, instead leaning in to confer with her teammates.
When they arrive at Ichiraku’s, Team 7 sits as far away from him as possible, Sakura even yanking Kakashi into a seat at the other end of the bar. As they strike up a conversation with Teuchi, a bemused Yamato finds himself face to face with Ayame.
“Why the sudden exile, Yamato?” she asks quietly, eyebrows raised. “Did something happen with you and Kakashi?”
“No,” Yamato says, “well, yes, but—” he suddenly becomes intensely aware of Team 7’s eyes on him, and lowers his voice.
“Team 7 might, uh, think that I’m dying of a broken heart. Or unrequited love? I’m a little unclear on the details. Either way, he’s been no help about it.” Yamato turns to scowl at Kakashi, who’s seemingly intent on studying the menu despite the fact that he’s been ordering the same thing for as long as Yamato’s known him.
Across the bar, Ayame raises a hand to her mouth to stifle a giggle. Naruto crows victoriously and Yamato watches, resigned to his fate, as Sakura hits him over the head.
--
It turns into something of a routine, after that. Every time they’re out with Team 7, Kakashi somehow startles him just as they pass a familiar face, and before long the kids have somehow manufactured a reason for Yamato to find himself alone with them.
He spars with Gai, who declares him “Full of Vigorous and Youthful Vibrancy, and as Worthy as ever of his Hip Rival’s Att—” before Yamato manages to land a kick on him that sends him flying across the training field.
Anko needles him into buying dango for her and teases him for a full hour about being too shy to talk about his feelings to three kids even when every jounin in Konoha has known for years. Aware of their audience, she pecks him on the cheek before she goes, and winks at a narrow-eyed Kakashi on her way out the door.
He and Iruka spend a pleasant lunch together – Iruka claps a hand to his face and shakes with helpless laughter when he hears about Team 7’s latest antics, and then spends the rest of their meal helping Yamato plot his revenge on Kakashi. It’s a well-planned and, frankly, vicious prank, and Yamato shudders and reminds himself to never get on Iruka’s bad side.
All things considered, it’s strangely… enjoyable. He’s always been friendly with the other adults in the village, but he’s never considered any of them friends. His intensely private lifestyle hasn’t lent itself to going out drinking on a Friday night, or really anything beyond casual social interactions.
Each encounter, though, however forced, is making him reconsider. They’re easygoing, they poke fun at him and gripe with him in equal measure, and, most importantly, they are far too used to Team 7’s antics to be fazed by them any longer. Yamato finds himself agreeing to meet up with them later, for coffee or training or dinner, even without Team 7 forcing it.
Still. There comes a point where he is ready to be done.
“Kakashi,” he says one Sunday, “are you planning on stopping this anytime soon?” It’s early in the morning, and they’re both drinking coffee and watching the sun rise from their back porch. It’s late enough in summer that mornings are still cool, and they’re draped in a thick blanket, pressed up against each other to fight off the chill.
Yamato feels more than hears Kakashi’s sigh. “I thought they would’ve caught on by now,” he says, a little petulant. “Frankly, it’s a little disappointing that they haven’t. It’s not like I’ve been subtle.”
It’s not an answer, exactly, but Yamato suspects it’s all he’s going to get. “Alright. But I miss you, you know. It’s nice to spend time with everyone, but they’re not you.”
He leans over to press a sleepy kiss to the corner of Kakashi’s mouth, watches as the tips of his ears go pink. Satisfied, he rests his head on Kakashi’s shoulder and wraps an arm around his back.
“You know, Tenzō, this could all be over if you just told them,” Kakashi says, pressing a kiss into his hair and letting out a strangled “oof” when Yamato elbows him. “Are you really so ashamed to be seen with me in public?”
“Shut up,” Yamato mutters, cheeks coloring, “you know it’s not that. I don’t know. I felt like we needed to do it properly, with them, somehow. I should’ve known that nothing can ever be so straightforward with Team 7.”
He sighs, the breath visible in the cool morning air, and Kakashi tugs him closer, runs his fingers through Yamato’s hair until his hand is resting at the base of his head.
“At any rate, it’s too late now, especially now that you’ve turned it into some bizarre training exercise.” He tries to sound grumpy as he says it, but he’s smiling, and he knows that Kakashi can tell.
Kakashi just hums in response, tilting Yamato’s head up into a kiss that tastes of coffee. The roses in their garden bloom, a few days early.
--
Of course, with Team 7 nothing ever goes as planned.
It’s early enough that they’re both still in bed when there’s a loud knock at the front door.
“Sensei, I know you’re in there! You said we had team training this morning and I’m not going to wait for you today!” Kakashi groans and pulls the covers over his head as Sakura continues pounding on the door.
“Tenzooo,” he whines, “make her go away, please.” Yamato scrubs a hand over his face, exasperated.
“You should have told me you promised you would train with them, Kakashi, and I wouldn’t have – well. I’ll let her in, but only because I don’t want her to break the door down,” he says, still half asleep. “But you’re going to have to get up, it’s too early for me to do your dirty work.”
He throws on a shirt on his way out of the room, shooting one more glare at Kakashi for good measure. Sakura is still taking out her frustration on their front door, and he can hear a steady stream of curses from the other side.
“We do have neighbors, you know,” he says, yawning, as he opens the door. Sakura freezes when she sees him.
“Captain..?” Sakura narrows her eyes, suspicious. “Isn’t this… Kakashi-sensei’s house?”
“Yes,” Kakashi calls from behind him, and Sakura’s eyes go wide, darting back and forth between him and Yamato. When Yamato turns around it’s to see Kakashi, still draped in the comforter, poking his head out from the bedroom. He sighs, running his hand through his hair.
When he turns back to Sakura, she’s avoiding eye contact. “I’m very sorry about him, Sakura,” Yamato says, “I’ll make sure he gets to your training.”
She lets out a squeak at that, flushing bright red. “It’s alright, Captain! I’ll let you handle him, uh, it, uh, ok I’ll see you at training ok bye!” She trips over her words, flustered, and beats a hasty retreat, probably to go confer with Naruto and Sai.
Yamato sags against the door, looking wearily at Kakashi, who just looks amused.
“If they don’t figure it out after that I think I’ll have to tell Tsunade they’re not fit to be shinobi,” Kakashi says. Yamato can’t help the snort at that, although he still aims a weak punch at Kakashi’s arm.
“They’re really going to hate you if you don’t go to training now,” Yamato says, corners of his mouth twitching up despite his best attempt to keep a straight face.
“I don’t know,” Kakashi hums, thinking, “they might need a while to recover. And to argue about whether or not Sakura’s right.” Yamato does finally burst into helpless laughter at that.
“Kakashi, her face,” he wheezes, tilting forward into Kakashi’s shoulder, “I can’t believe you came out in just a blanket, I hate you so much.”
Kakashi feigns a wounded look, but he can’t keep it up – soon he’s laughing too, and they collapse back on the bed, trying to regain their breath.
--
Predictably, they’re cornered by Team 7 as soon as they get to the training ground. When they shunshin onto the field at the same time, Sakura nods decisively, giving the boys a glare that screams ‘I told you so.’
Naruto’s entire face is screwed into an expression that means he’s thinking very hard about something. Sai, unsurprisingly, is much more direct.
“Is Sakura correct in her assessment that the two of you are—” Yamato doesn’t particularly want to know how that sentence ends, so he cuts Sai off.
“Uh. Yes? Probably?” He shrugs, uncomfortable, and looks to Kakashi for help. Kakashi says nothing.
“Captain Yamato… does this mean… you knew you were fine?” There’s a dark tone to Sakura’s voice that Yamato doesn’t particularly like. “That whole time you just… let us think you were dying?”
She narrows her eyes at him and Yamato swallows audibly, tugging at the collar of his shirt. Behind him, Kakashi lets out a quiet huff of laughter. Sakura’s eyes snap to the other man immediately, and Yamato breathes a silent sigh of relief at the moment of reprieve from her accusatory glare.
“And YOU!” she shouts, pointing at Kakashi, “you’re even worse, sensei! Harassing poor Captain Yamato every day while he was just trying to do his job, purposefully traumatizing us for some lesson? Why, you—”
She breaks off then, evidently deciding that this is the type of disagreement better settled with fists.
Kakashi manages to evade her first punch with a substitution – although when her fist makes contact with a log instead of her teacher Sakura’s murderous intent only seems to strengthen – and then she and Naruto are chasing him across the training field, shouting as they go.
Yamato sighs and settles down in a shady patch of grass. From the looks of it, their fight could last a while – Sakura and Naruto are motivated by a righteous fury, and Kakashi just looks like he’s having fun. At a gesture from Sakura, Sai joins in as well, and despite the serious killer intent he can feel emanating from Sakura, Yamato is surprised by the wave of fondness he feels, watching the four of them dart across the field in the early morning light.
He doesn’t fight the surge of mokuton energy when he feels it, this time. If the training field suddenly looks more like a meadow in full bloom, the rest of the team is too focused on fighting to notice, anyways.