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“I can’t believe I let you talk me into a paint and sip party”, Chris grumbled to her glass of some sort of white wine while she adjusted the paint smock she’d accepted because she didn’t want to ruin tonight’s clothes. Kira’s lips twitched into a smile, and it wasn’t fair that she managed to make an oversized paint shirt, leggings, and a messy bun look so cute. Thankfully, it was a small introductory class with canvas, brushes, and little tubes of paint already provided for tonight’s subject - the slice of ocean and beach in front of the hotel room hosting the event. Barring anyone trying to speedpaint, the class was timed out to catch the sunset.
“I still can’t believe you agreed to a date”, Kira spoke quietly so their conversation would blend into the din of the other attendees’ chit chat as they started roughing in the divisions between sand, ocean, and sky. Chris had spent a considerable amount of her free time after her shifts on Google in an incognito window, switching from one site to another and tracking down glossary pages. She felt like someone had blinded her in the middle of taking a shot, and she didn’t like being at such a disadvantage that she had to rely on Kira for all of her answers. She took a sip of the wine and set it down, so she wouldn’t be distracted by holding the glass with her left hand in order to lightly pencil in a sketch on her canvas.
“You know”, Kira seemed to be a fan of using the broad brush to lay down base layers, and Chris got the distinct impression that she wasn’t a total novice at painting like herself, “I can answer questions you may have about polyamory. I know it’s not fair to drop something you may not know anything about and expect you to figure it out on your own.”
“I’m not totally hopeless at research”, Chris focused on mixing the white, yellow, and brown into sand, painting a bit darker than real time and partially from memory, “I think I can understand the theory of loving more than one person at a time. I’ve just never considered it for myself before, so I don’t know how I feel about it yet. What if I don’t get that happy feeling from watching you date someone else in front of me?”
“Unlearning mononormativity isn’t as simple as flipping a switch”, Kira hesitated and took a long time being thorough in cleaning her brush, “Those who question the cultural script of innate jealousy themselves may discover compersion faster, but I can’t really tell you how to feel about a situation. You might not comperse the very first time you meet Ty, but I would appreciate any consideration you give to the idea.”
Don’t knock it ’til you try it. Chris had run across the general idea when she was younger and questioning her sexuality, and even though she had run into plenty of bi people who couldn’t point towards direct experimentation with every gender they were attracted to, she hadn’t been one who could say something like that without lived confirmation. Only bringing home boys had been very convenient for her grandparents to not believe that she was interested in girls as well, and she had inherited just enough stubbornness and spite from them to prove them wrong. And now, years later, she was trying to figure out if she could date a girl who wanted to date her and a guy. Technically, Kira had brought up a triad, which meant an expectation of Chris and Ty dating as well, but that was putting the cart before the horse in Chris’ opinion.
“Don’t worry, Suzette”, the lilt of the instructor’s Australian accent stood out against the background of the rest of the room, “The paint water is from rainwater storage because Palatable Palettes tries to collaborate with eco-friendly hosts. You can enjoy your paint’n’sip without worrying about water waste.”
He looked rather unremarkable with brown hair and a nice business casual outfit without any visible piercings, tattoos, or unnatural hair dye. Chris didn’t doubt that he had some knowledge of painting because he had been kindly pointing out tips and answering questions as the sun had started to set and the pleasantly tipsy attendees had started to hit crunch time. She had switched to a broad brush to get something down for the darkening water and sky before getting caught up in the pink, peach, and red streaks. It was easier to focus on painting because drinking too fast would lead to an accidental abstract picture, and because Chris wasn’t sure she could picture herself dating two people right now, but she wasn’t entirely opposed to the idea. She had abandoned her wine to keep her thoughts from getting fuzzy like the edges of the colors in their wet paint on wet paint attempts. Shame there weren’t more clouds tonight.
“Interesting highlighting technique, Kira”, the instructor sounded amused by something, but Chris wasn’t sure why both of them seemed to find the little strokes of gold funny. Kira’s smile was radiant and familiar, “What can I say, Ty? I was taught by someone who fancies metallic highlighting.”
The man rolled his eyes good-naturedly and left the gentle ribbing to help someone who had run out of a shade of blue. It wasn’t a large public display of affection like a kiss or even a touch, but Chris’ gut clenched at the realization that this was not two strangers meeting. Ty. This was Kira’s boyfriend and Chris’ sorta metamour, if she was going to stick with this thing. Kira was still smiling to herself and adding details with a small brush, and Chris returned to her wine with not-sips. Her sky had started to darken around the edges of the canvas, and the water lost some of its preliminary rippling and movement with blurry dark strokes. She didn’t feel an all encompassing jealousy, anger, or any emotion, really, which was not what Chris had expected. Was it because she had gotten the heads up on Kira having a boyfriend? Was it a minor degree of shock that she practically saw her girlfriend flirt with a man? Was it a confusing overanalysis because she was trying to figure out if she could even comperse at all?
Perhaps draining her wine glass wasn’t the wisest move, but it allowed Chris to apply a partial ring of red paint to the lip and press it into her canvas instead of trying to guesstimate a semicircle for the sun. Despite her earlier inclinations, the actual colors of her sunset across the sky were being mixed on the canvas in an abstract bleeding of blush to peach to yellow. It was rather like blending foundation and blush, but a bit more wet. Her highlights in the water were the same bloody red as the sun, and in the end, Chris felt oddly light-headed and bit like something had taken over her body to paint darker than she had intended to. She was accustomed to underestimating how much alcoholic punch wine had, but it turned out that drinking even - Yarra View Yarra Valley Reserve Chardonnay, according to the card describing the wine - fast enough made her feel a bit more than tipsy. She concentrated on cleaning the brushes in her paint water to the best of her abilities to make up for painting the wine glass during the rest of the class, and her mind settled back into her skull with the twinging of a small headache by the end. Chris wasn’t sober enough to want to stay afterwards, though, because she could tell the slow from anticipation speed that Kira was using to let everyone else leave. Ty seemed polite and funny, but Chris didn’t have a good answer for being the only one to utilize her wine glass in painting, which was probably why her stomach was doing flip-flops. Probably.
Later that evening, after apologizing to Kira for not drinking responsibly enough to grab a bite to eat (the addition of ‘with Ty’ remained unspoken) and a ride home with Lyft, Chris had no idea what to do with herself. She had to carefully set the canvas on the kitchen counter to finish drying, and she was embarrassed to have been caught off guard by wine of all drinks. She actually was hungry, and she had planned on eating out with Kira afterwards, presumably to meet Ty. It was disappointing to let Kira down like this because she had wanted to try, but wine-Chris just wanted to order Chinese takeout and vege in front of the tv - activities that did not require complex and emotionally fraught cognitive abilities. A text notification on her phone interrupted the third episode of Bob’s Burgers.
Hey, Christina. This is Ty
I go by Chris
Duly noted. We didn’t exactly get to meet tonight
Yeah, I wasn’t sure if I could do it. I didn’t feel jealous or w/e
but I also don’t think I felt comparison?
Autocorrect. C o m p e r s i o n
Ah. Were you uncomfortable being in one of my classes?
No
Thanks for the extra cleanup btw
Sorry. Seemed like a good idea at the time
No worries, it was a lovely final product
It wasn’t the horriblest date I’ve ever been on fwiw
Would you like to try a date 2.0?