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I love the way she feels in my hands. I run my hands lightly over her blonde hair. Her gorgeous body, which is strong and toned. I’ve warned her that she threatens my self-control, but moments like these, while she’s asleep and peaceful, make the world around me melt away.
Awake, she is strong and powerful. Fierce. Brave. Hot. But asleep, she is gentle. It is impossible to count the things I love about her, but as I appreciate this moment, I allow my eyes to selfishly roam her body. I want to appreciate how the cut lines of her body contrasted with the softness of her hair, the gentle bend at her waist. I don't want to ever forget the sight of the slight dip to her waist, her small chest moving slowly up and down with her steady, slow, sleeping breaths. Although I can still feel the hot desire her body brings to mine, it isn’t the insatiable, hungry desire that makes me feel like I’ll never have enough of her. I know she is mine, and I am hers.
Laying next to her, I myself am fully clothed but she is only wearing a loose T-shirt that hangs off her side, letting the outline of her shape be seen. I got up early and got dressed-out of habit more than anything else-but now I want to strip every article that separates us away. A rush of desire brings heat to my ears as I trace her jaw with my finger. Her eyelashes flutter a little and I know she is not quite as asleep as she is pretending to be. I brush her hair away from her neck and jaw, revealing more of her skin. Even though I have seen more of her than this, every inch of her skin that I expose feels exhilarating. To touch her at all still brings electricity to my fingertips. She lets out a soft sigh as I gently place a kiss at the nape of her neck. I relish her touch as she finds my hand with hers. I plant a few more gentle, serene kisses along her shoulder and neck. I want to caress every inch of her skin with my lips. Her fingers lace into mine and she squeezes my palm against hers...
Suddenly, she rolls sharply from her side unto her back, grabbing my wrist and pulling me on top of her. A short grunt escapes me as I feel the power in her body collide with mine. Being this close to her surely must be the greatest feat of self-control ever. But I know if it is, I have failed.
I let out something between and growl and a moan, as I pull my body on top of her, hungrily fitting my mouth to hers. This fervent move elicits a short, high-pitched moan of excitement from Tris. While I am still busy kissing her lips, she urgently grabs the hem of her own T-shirt and pulls it over her head, her hands wasting no time at all as they move to my hips. She moans into my mouth as I press myself to her, and I have to mentally pry my focus away from how good her mouth feels on mine to remove what still separates our skin: my clothes. My clothes! I have to get my clothes off. Tris’s anxious hands help me quickly lift my shirt over my head and toss it onto the floor. Her soft fingers run along the ridges in my back as I fumble with my belt buckle. My brain is so jumbled, my thoughts so corrupted, that my hands can’t seem to get my pants off in an orderly manner. God, what kind of man can’t get his own damn pants off? I have to glance down at my lower half to get my belt out of my belt loops and pop the button. I can feel my face and ears tinging pink as I awkwardly shimmy partway out of my pants. I’m doing this all wrong, I think as I realize her mouth is waiting on mine. When my gaze falls back on her face, I realize how self-conscious she must feel. We were both raised Abnegation, and I know as well as anyone how hard those thoughts are to escape. My unbuttoned pants forgotten, I murmur something about love as I pepper her chest with kisses. Gorgeous. Is all I can think as she moans beneath me and presses her hips into mine. To have this gorgeous girl all to myself, I think I must still be dreaming. Or it is a simulation. But as her left hand winds into my hair and her right grips the side of the bed, I remind myself I’ve never felt anything like this in a dream or a situation.
“Tobias!” She says sternly, the fingers in my hair yanking my head up to meet her gaze. Her eyes are fierce and resolute, but I also see the same longing I have reflected in her cool blue eyes.
“Stop. Teasing.” She says slowly, but breathlessly, keeping my gaze locked on her the whole time. A cool smirk spreads across my lips as my eyes turn playful.
“Make me,” I say, crashing my mouth unto hers. I can feel her jaw clenching and her body tensing with frustration. She grinds her hips into mine and I have to steel myself not to groan. I find her hands with my own and wind our fingers together more tightly. She tries to push our hands south, towards our lower halves, but I resist, keeping my elbows bent and her hands pinned on the bed. She lets out one last huff of exasperation before pushing up on my body with all her weight, and successfully flipping me onto my back. Completely taken by surprise, I do nothing to resist as she forcefully swings her upper body over mine.
“Enough.” She says, her bare chest now heaving against mine as she takes control. She forces my hands together above my head as she leans down to connect our mouths. I could break her grip, but it wouldn’t be easy: her strength is easily underestimated.
I suddenly realize that no one’s ever seen me this vulnerable before. This raw, this real: Half dressed, and *not* in control. My usually ever-so-guarded inner thoughts written all across my body. The power she holds over me makes my heart rate skyrocket, my breathing intensify.
No, not true. But no one has ever seen *Four* this way. Four is *never* not in control, *never* not guarded. It takes me a minute, but I realize this is what’s so special about her and I.
I attempt to keep these inner thoughts of sentiment at bay by clenching my jaw, but as Tris faintly bites my lower lip, I want nothing more than to grab her waist and flip us back over.
Instead, though, I am surprised by the mischievous expression Tris gives me as she kisses my sternum and chest. Her fingernails dig into my palms, my hands still helplessly pinned above me. I let out a sigh from between my clenched teeth, my crotch surely betraying my emotions.
“God, Tris you look incredible.” I half whisper, half hiss. With this encouragement, as well as the growing encouragement in my still-very-much-on pants, her movements quicken and her nails dig into my hands harder, making a various array of grunt and moans fall out of my mouth.
Finally, after what seems like an eternity of both torture and ecstasy, Tris shifts so she can pin my wrists with one hand. She uses the other to inch down the waistband of my jeans and my underwear. Some more words and noises fall out of my mouth as I become completely exposed to her. I’m finding it harder and harder to breathe, my chest tightening and my heart rate sky high. I kick my pants the rest of the way off as her gaze slowly works its way up my body. When her gaze meets mine, I know she must see panic, because her expression softens, that Abnegation again always putting others first.
“No, Tris,” I have to take several gulps of air as I shake my head, “no, Tris, don’t stop”. And she doesn’t. I’m beginning to feel light headed as her mouth slams into mine again, but it doesn’t stay there long. Her mouth moves to my collarbone, to my sternum, kissing all the way down my abs in a center line. When her mouth reaches my groin, she looks up at me with an expression I truly have never seen her wear before. Her hands release mine as she drags her nails across my chest. She holds on to my sides as I feel her mouth at the tip of my cock. I shake my head, “no, god, no, Tris, just, just…” but I can’t catch my breath enough to finish the sentence. Never one to appreciate teasing, I feel her body moving to straddle me as my hands tangle in her hair.
My dick is rock-hard and trembling by the time her own body meets mine. Taking my hands again, I feel her biting on one of my fingers, although my eyes are closed, my head leaning back on the pillow. She bites hard. Even this suggestion of pain intensifies my pleasure. I am completely unconscious of the noises I am making now, but they are surely embarrassing.
And Tris is attentive—she knows exactly what actions bring another moan from my lips. She again pins my hands above my head, restraining any possible defense of my naked body. I’m in a position I never thought I would ever be comfortable in, let alone get pleasure from. But sure enough, this power dynamic brings on new waves of pleasure that I can feel pulsing throughout my whole body. She can feel it too. I am only dimly aware that she is moaning now too. Her nails dig into my wrists hard enough to leaves gouges and I growl into her ear, which is placed next to my head, her breath hot against my shoulder.
Her moans getting high and higher, she pulls the same move as before, biting down on my shoulder. I let out a loud grunt as she undoubtedly tastes blood.
I thrust faster into her, needing her. I try vaguely to open my eyes, but my vision is going spotty and I feel like I’ve never been so close in my life. I murmur her name into the soft hair bent over my other shoulder now. I can’t manage to say anything else, but the implication is clear.
I keep thrusting, hard and fast, into the fierce woman on top of me, and she keeps one hand pinned with hers, the other encouraging me to caress her own body now. I cup her breast in my hand and I can feel her nod into my shoulder and let out a high yes.
But I’m unconscious of anything else as I feel her nails scrape hard into my sides. I yell her name loudly, too loudly, as I release into her. The mix of pleasure and pain indistinguishable. I heave against her as she collapses onto me.
Coming up for air from the euphoria, I realize Tris’s body is still against mine and a new wave of panic hits me as she continues to pant against my shoulder.
“Oh god, Tris, did you…?” And suddenly I can’t even finish the sentence. I was so worried about my own pleasure, being so self-absorbed, that I forgot whatever simple sex manners I might have known. Before she can even respond, I’m panicking, preparing my apology, as if sex with me is something I need to apologize for.
“Oh God, Tris, I’m sorry, I, I…”
“No, no, no” She shakes her head, putting her hand over my racing heart, calming me. “I’m good,” She nods enthusiastically, although she is clearly exhausted. And letting out a slightly embarrassed chuckle, I let head slam back down to the bed. She giggles with me, putting her head on my chest and nuzzling to my side.