Chapter Text
Kihyun had been staring up at his ceiling crying for what must’ve been an hour now.
He’d spent the majority of his day out with his best friends, celebrating the new year. He was so happy then, feeling like he was going to kick 2019’s ass and that things were going to be better than they’d been last year. Or at least better than every day after him.
But when he got home and was ready to tuck away for the night, the happiness taking him to sleep...everything seemed to crash down. So there he was, lying there with wet cheeks, only whimpers coming out as it seemed that no more tears could manage to fall out anymore.
He didn’t know what to do. So he thought that maybe someone else could decide for him.
the we hate kihyun club
won
won
wonnie
hyunnie
won won
double trouble
won in a million
the devil: please shut up
hyunnie pleaseeeee
it’s an emergency
the devil: the emergency is my phone ringing in my ear every two seconds
please
hyungwon
my prince
my everything
the devil: kihyun i might actually come and punch you rn
wonnie: save some room on his face for me!!
you guys :((
you wouldn’t hit such a beautiful face would you 🥺
the devil: of course not
which is why you’re the perfect candidate :)
wonnie: ugh
just what do you want ki
and why can’t you ever text at a normal time?????
i’m SORRY
i know we all had a late night but something came up
AND IDK WHAT DO WITH MY LIFE ANYMORE
THIS IS LIKE
A CODE PURPLE
wonnie: PURPLE??? IS YOUR MOM OKAY IS IT YOUR SISTER WHAT DO YOU MEAN???
the devil: that’s code blue honey,,,
wonnie: OH OH thank god i was so scared
purple is something to do with school then?
the devil: that would be yellow hoseok
wonnie: YELLOW??? then wtf is GREEN then???
are you guys done
can we get back to me
the devil: [read: 6:13]
ugh
won please don’t leave me hanging
wonnie: ki i really am just so tired
and now i’m stressed because i thought mama yoo was in danger
i’m sorry
just listen to me for ONE second PLEASE
the devil: ……………
wonnie: what’s wrong? are you okay?
no actually IM LOSING MY GD MIND
it’s gone
EVERYTHING IS GONE
I AM GONNA DIE ALONE
MY LIFE AS WE KNOW IT IS OVER
the devil: like i said: ………….
wonnie: anyways
ki just slow down
what’s going on???
i was doing my nightly routine
ya know checking up on my future fucking husband
and boom
it’s gone
HIS TWITTER IS GONE
WTF AM I GOING TO DO
wonnie: kihyun…...
the devil: so
i’m going back to sleep
and my phone will be on do not disturb
HYUNGWON
PLEASE
the devil: 💤💤💤
wonnie?
wonnie: listen i love you
but i can’t believe we are having this talk at 6 am
I DIDNT ASK FOR MY ENTIRE WORLD TO CRUMBLE AT THIS TIME ALRIGHT
i really just don’t know what to do :((
wonnie: you could...idk
this may be a stretch but you could…
MOVE ON
tbh i prefer hyungwon’s silence
wonnie: ki it’s been over a year
and this twitter you’re having a meltdown over...hasn’t been active in almost twice as long
this guy isn’t just gonna miraculously pop back into your life
and you need to stop putting your life on hold for a guy you talked to for ONE NIGHT
if the universe wanted this for you, don’t you think things would be different?
he’s all i had, won :((
i really believe that we should be together
wonnie: i know kiki :(( and i want that for you too but…
maybe it’s time to let it go?
what if you had let hyungwon go?
you of all people should understand me rn
wonnie: that’s different kihyun
it’s really not
and you KNOW it’s not
wonnie: look…
it’s really early, we all had a late night
just please let’s sleep and not argue too much over this
i’ll come over later and bring you a coffee alright?
we’ll talk more then ♥️
an iced coffee? 🥺
wonnie: always.
black.
three sugars.
i know.
fine
goodnight
love you wonnie :((
wonnie: night night ♥️
the devil: goodnight. i want a caramel frappuccino 🥰
wonnie: [read: 6:46]
And with that, Kihyun locked his phone and stared at the ceiling. He hoped sleep would come for him before his mind had any more chances to torture him that night. Yet when he closed his eyes, he was transported back into that club in midtown nyc staring into those strangely alluring dark eyes.
Daniel. That was his name. The only thing that Kihyun had to go on for the last year, and with no luck. I mean, he knew that the man liked to dress in all black. Which included black nail polish, but not on all fingers. And no, he didn’t have a reason for it. He knew he was taking a year off of school where he was studying to be an English teacher. But he also knew that Daniel loved music and would spend every second of free time writing and producing until his heart’s content.
He knew that it was just his mom and his little brother at home. But even after his dad died, Daniel stayed connected with his grandparents in New York which is exactly why he’d been there the day Kihyun walked into the little nightclub.
There were other things Kihyun knew too. Like how his heart would practically leap out of his throat every time Daniel spoke, his deep voice drowning out the background of drunk chants and loud music around them. He knew that his hands got progressively sweatier every time he spoke because Daniel would always lean his head over and scoot closer as if he had to take in every inch of Kihyun’s face when he talked. He knew that he bit his tongue slightly when he laughed, and when he did a cute little dimple would pop up on his cheek.
But even with knowing all that, he failed to discover the most important things. The ones that would keep him connected to the gentle man he talked with for hours sitting in the corner of the club, stuck inside their own world.
It was the first time he felt such intense feelings for a person so quickly. And maybe Kihyun thought that he would never feel that again, and he hadn’t for the last year or so. Every guy he dated, just wasn’t enough. Their hair was too light, their face lacked any signs of dimples, and their fingernails were unfortunately....bare. They just weren’t HIM.
So eventually he gave up on finding love and focused on finding Daniel. He remembered a brief conversation he had with Daniel about some twitter meme, with the man even pulling out his own twitter app to show him. He was so busy laughing and also watching the other man laugh, he didn’t think twice about getting the man to follow him.
But regardless, that conversation weighed on his mind as he held onto the fleeting memory of Daniel’s twitter handle. He recalled that prior to their laughter, he caught a glimpse of it and couldn’t help but giggle at the nickname “Danny”. It was cute which he wasn’t surprised because everything about the man was cute.
So through weeks and weeks of aimless twitter searching (and let’s be real, stalking) he finally stumbled upon a familiar face. And he was so relieved. Until he clicked on the profile.
It was his Daniel alright, that he was sure of. Except he hadn’t tweeted in........almost a year.
Kihyun had no idea where to go from there. But he spent every second he could tearing apart the twitter account praying for a clue to another way to contact him. There was none. But it didn’t stop Kihyun from dming him every day hoping that by some miracle, Daniel would check in on his old account. He didn’t.
It was another one of those nights, after spending an entire day of third wheeling with Hyungwon and Wonho for New Year’s, that he went to message Daniel. But when he searched the username, the account was gone.
Kihyun should’ve known this day would come. Not all twitter accounts last forever, especially ones with zero activity. But, his only connection to Daniel had been ripped away from him. And he felt broken. But there was no one who could possibly understand.
So here he was staring at his ceiling, fighting back tears and still praying that sleep would come soon. And eventually, it did. Along with images of black clothes, black hair, and black nail polish....bright eyes, bright smile, bright Daniel.
__________________________________
They were inside a music shop. Wonho arrived at Kihyun’s house that morning with an iced coffee in hand, as promised. Even with that, and the long lecture from Wonho about how he’ll never find the love of his life if he stays inside all day, Kihyun couldn’t even make it past the living room couch. Wonho even tried to persuade Kihyun by offering to buy the latest album from his favorite group, but he just preferred to stay bundled inside his blanket cocoon and waste away. And it wasn’t until Kihyun got tired of the relentless cooing and cuddling between his two best friends that he took Wonho up on his offer. Selfishly, he couldn’t take witnessing people so in love when he lost his possibly only chance to have that for himself.
Wonho and Hyungwon were still holding strong after two whole years. Kihyun often found comfort in the fact that the two most important men in his life found love, and found it with each other. Kihyun had met Hyungwon when they became roommates their first year in college. Hyungwon had sort of a snarky demeanor, and at first Kihyun didn’t think they would get along at all. But one particular evening, after many hours of studying in silence in their rooms, Hyungwon offered to buy Kihyun dinner and it turned out that they had more in common than either expected. However, their similar attitudes still caused them to butt heads every so often.
Wonho, on the other hand, Kihyun knew since they were children. They were next door neighbors and it was inevitable that they would just hit it off, and they did. And they’ve been inseparable ever since. Kihyun got the joy of watching them meet for the first time after asling Wonho to meet him at their dorm one morning. He watched for weeks as Wonho, normally a natural with his social skills, fumble every time he tried to speak to his roommate. And he listened to all of the trials of his best friend’s developing crush for months on end, until eventually fate won in the end.
But things were much different now than they were two years ago. Kihyun hadn’t met Daniel then. He hadn’t even had a taste of what love could be like, therefore he couldn’t miss it or crave it. Now, not only had he tasted it, but the universe was continuously trying to scrub away every trace of it he had left.
So maybe he couldn’t feel that joy watching his best friends cuddled up next to him anymore.
And that’s how he ended up in the middle of a music shop, holding onto the newest album from his favorite group Minion. Normally, he would’ve been jumping around, enjoying the fact that he managed to grab the last one available.
He’d never even been to this shop before. He and Hyungwon only having moved into their current apartment a month ago. But, staring at the cover art at the male duo on the cover, he was reminded of another successful and beautiful love story that he just will never have. He stood there lost in thought for a while, not even noticing Wonho approaching.
“Sorry about that. I can’t believe the AUDACITY of some people. That guy really thinks Ariana is overrated...I almost got us kicked out of here.” Wonho stood there, arms crossed and fuming, until he noticed Kihyun staring absentmindedly at the album in his hands.
“Ki? I really hate seeing you this way, come on.” Kihyun snapped his head up, becoming aware of his surroundings again. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m being stupid you’re right.”, he pouted.
Wonho just stared at him, his frown becoming deeper. Kihyun knew he was probably being a pain. And he hated how he’d put his friends through the endless timeline of his unrequited love story. So before Wonho could began apologizing for no reason, Kihyun just sighed and grabbed his hand and started pulling him towards the register.
“It’s fine, it’s fine. I’M fine, Wonnie.”, he stopped once they got to the counter, a line forming in front of the cashier. He turned back to Wonho, trying to plaster his best fake smile onto his face. It didn’t match with the slight bags under his eyes, puffy cheeks, and the messy hair that poked out of his beanie...but Wonho decided to play along, anyways.
“Thank you for buying me this. I know it probably doesn’t look it, but I am so excited to finally listen to this!”, Kihyun slightly bounced as he talked. Wonho just smiled, “It’s really no problem, as long as you promise me that you won’t spend the next month listening to whichever sad songs may be on there on a loop.”
Kihyun frowned, hitting the taller man with the album repeatedly. “You’re. The. Worst. I take everything back!!!” They laughed, Womho trying to dodge the attacks. But honestly, he was willing to take the hits as long as Kihyun could feel a little better. They started to move up with the line again, their laughter dying down. Until something behind Kihyun, or rather someone, caught Wonho’s eye.
He squinted slightly, confused. He took note of the cashier of the shop, trying desperately to place where he has seen him before. Wonho, being the type of person that wore every emotion he felt so visibly on his face, caught Kihyun’s attention immediately.
“What’s wrong with you, weirdo?”, he chuckled, turning to see for himself. And if it wasn’t for Wonho directly behind him, Kihyun swears he would’ve fell completely on his ass just then. He blinked several times, trying to make sense of the image in front of him. He was sure he wasn’t taking a single breath in or out in that moment.
It was him. Well, not exactly. There was a young man behind the counter, making conversation with the customer in front of him. He seemed different. His hair, instead of dark black, was a bright blonde and pushed off to one side and tucked behind his ear. And on that ear was an array of different piercings that snaked down into a dangly cross on his lobe.
His piercing collection was completed though, with two little dots that popped out against the arch of his eyebrow. His face bore an uninterested expression that was somehow counteracted by his eyes. They were beautiful and dark, yet they shined and sparkled all at once. So yes, he was different. But at the same time he was so undeniably HIM, and everything Kihyun could’ve hoped to see again.
Daniel had finally come back to him, and he was brighter than ever.