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When Nicole got back to the Sheriff’s station after an extra-long and double-extra-obnoxious day of patrolling the aptly named town of Purgatory, she went straight for the hallway that lead to the annexed office in the back that had been handed over to the Black Badge Division, her weary spirits already lifting just thinking about her sweet, angelic girlfriend’s sunshine smile pointed her way. When Waverly smiled at her, Nicole felt like a damn superhero. She could do anything, she could save the world, she could fly. If the power of Waverly’s smile could be bottled, they could achieve world peace in time for happy hour; it was something the redheaded cop just knew in her bones.
That flood of anticipatory sunlight was snuffed out before she’d even reached the doorway, though, when the sound of her girlfriend crying her sweet little heart out met Nicole’s ears. If Waverly’s smile was bottled sunshine, Waverly crying was a vice that tightened inside Nicole’s chest until she felt like she’d never, ever get another full breath of air in her lungs.
Rushing the final few feet to the BBD office, she found Wynonna comforting a sobbing Waverly on the couch, crumpled up against her big sister’s shoulder with both hands over her face. The younger girl was shaking all over, tucked up in a little ball that made her small body look even smaller under Wynonna’s protective arm.
“Baby…what happened?” the tall cop crooned worriedly, kneeling at her girlfriend’s feet and reaching for her hands automatically. Her touch was light, gentle, thumbs brushing soothingly over the back of Waverly’s delicate wrists.
“N-nic…I…*s-snghf!*…” Waverly shook her head weakly, choking on her words through jagged, hitching breaths as she tried to control the flood of tears that had overtaken her whole body. As her hands fell away from her face, Nicole gasped at the wide splash of red drying across the front of her girlfriend’s favorite sparkly silver sweater.
“Relax, Haught stuff, it’s not her blood,” Wynonna said calmly, watching all the color drain from the redhead’s face in an instant. “We hit the Albertsons’ new puppy with the pickup.” The older Earp slipped her arm from its protective position around her baby sister’s shoulder, and started running through her long hair instead.
“I hit the puppy,” Waverly corrected, her voice a rough croak as she took one of her hands back from Nicole to wipe her nose, sniffling miserably. “Y-you were just an innocent passenger…I didn’t see him, I, I, I’m n-n-not…used to driving your truck…it’s j-just so much bigger than my Jeep…I f-felt the bump when he…*snf*…when he went under the tire…” Her breath was coming out ragged and shallow, and Nicole was afraid she was going to pass out if they didn’t get more oxygen into her, like now-ish.
“Baby, breathe,” Nicole hummed, managing to keep her voice steady and soothing as she cupped her girlfriend’s tear-streaked face in her hands, even though her heart felt like it was tearing itself in half at the pain radiating from the girl she loved more than life. “Hey, look at me…I’m right here. Breathe.” She wiped a few tears from Waverly’s flushed cheeks as their eyes found each other, warm brown and watery hazel, locking together like a lifeline. Waverly managed to take a few shaky breaths, in and out along with her girlfriend.
“That’s so good,” the taller girl murmured, smiling encouragingly as she felt one of her girlfriend’s small, warm hands slide over hers, anchoring them together more tightly as Waverly’s breathing evened out bit by bit. “You’re doing so great, baby…shh…I’m right here, sweet girl.” Nicole wiped a few more tears away with her thumb, leaning in to press their foreheads together for a few quiet moments.
“Haught stuff. Switch places with me,” Wynonna motioned to her spot on the couch, and Nicole was snuggled by to her girl on the old leather almost before the older Earp had a chance to stand up. Waverly melted against her, and the tall cop shifted so she could wrap both arms around her angel.
“Hey, I got you Waves…my poor sweet baby…shh, it wasn’t your fault.” She nuzzled into silk-soft brown hair, breathing in the familiar sunshine and cinnamon scent that was pure Waverly, mixed with the soft undertone of her apple shampoo.
“You don’t know that. You weren’t there,” the younger girl whispered, her voice still raw and rough from crying, though her breathing had finally relaxed as she went limp in the safety of her girlfriend’s arms. “It was so awful, Nicole…the sounds he made…I tried to save him, but Wynonna had to…you know…”
“I gave him peace,” the older Earp finished as she returned to the room with a box of tissues, which she deposited gently into her sister’s lap. “And Nicole’s right, baby girl, it wasn’t your fault. Everyone said so. The little guy ran right out into the middle of the road, there’s nothing you could have done. There was a loose board in the Albertsons’ fence, he just wiggled right through. It would have happened no matter who was driving. Okay?”
“’Kay,” Waverly mumbled, sounding thoroughly unconvinced as she took a tissue from the box in her lap and toyed with it absently. Nicole and Wynonna shared a silent look. They might not see eye to eye on everything, but when it came to Waverly, they were always united.
“How ‘bout I take you home now, hmm baby? I don’t think you’re up for dinner and dancing right now, huh?” Nicole hummed soothingly, tucking an errant strand of light brown hair back behind her girlfriend’s ear, and kissing the spot.
“Oh, God, I completely forgot…now I’m ruining date night, too…just like I ruin everything…” Waverly’s voice wobbled again as Nicole kissed away her tears.
“Hey, hey, hey…don’t talk about my girl like that,” the redhead teased, with a gentle smirk as she lifted Waverly’s chin, locking their eyes together again. Refusing to let her baby get lost in the dark place; keeping her grounded in what was real. “That’s just the demon talking, Waves…trying to make you hate yourself, hurt yourself, because she couldn’t hurt you herself. And she’s gone now. You could never ruin anything, Waverly Earp. Not if you tried.”
“Listen to your girlfriend, baby girl,” Wynonna chimed in, her voice gentle but commanding at the same time. “I told you, you finally picked a smart one. A little bit bossypants for my taste, maybe, but still…wicked smart.”
“Yes, thank you for that Wynonna,” Nicole said dryly; but there was a mirthful glint in her eyes that blossomed into a full-fledged grin when a tiny smile tugged at the corner of Waverly’s mouth, watching her girlfriend and her sister banter in that reassuringly familiar way. “So…home?”
“Yeah…home sounds good,” Waverly sighed, wiping her puffy eyes and pink nose on the crumpled tissue she still held before shoving it in her pocket, as if embarrassed by the physical evidence of her tears.
“All right, up you get angelpants,” Wynonna said gently, pulling her sister to her feet and steadying her when she stumbled a little dizzily.
“Whoa…head rush,” Waverly mumbled, rubbing her forehead absently as her eyes slid shut, letting the momentary vertigo pass. Nicole was on her feet in a hot second, one hand sliding protectively around her girlfriend’s slight waist, so Waverly was balanced securely between her girlfriend and her sister.
“Just take it slow, baby…I think you just about cried yourself sick,” Nicole cooed, gentle as a dove, dropping whisper-light kisses on Waverly’s pounding temple.
“Yeah…sorry,” the younger girl sighed, leaning magnetically into Nicole until her face was pressed into her girlfriend’s throat.
“This is a sorry-free zone,” Nicole replied, earning an approving grin from the older Earp over the top of the shorter girl’s head. “Now c’mon, let’s get you home so I can cuddle you up properly.”
“Okay,” Waverly agreed in a small voice, passively allowing her girlfriend to slip her warm winter coat over her shoulders, and the soft scarf around her neck.
“I’m gonna finish up here,” Wynonna gestured to the pile of papers on the BBD desk, trusting Nicole with her precious cargo. “Take good care of our girl, Haught stuff.”
“You know I will,” the redhead grinned, looking back down at Waverly and stroking her cheek, still flushed with the freshness of her tears. “Ready, Waves?” The shorter girl just nodded, leaning back into Nicole’s arm to show her willingness to let her girlfriend lead her. It was a little unnerving, seeing Waverly being so passive and submissive; that demon had really gotten under her skin, made her feel worthless, unlovable. And almost as soon as Jolene was gone, so was their mother. Again. It was a lot to process, and Nicole understood why it was easier for her girlfriend to just focus all that sadness on a dead puppy in the road.
“Okay, baby. C’mon, let’s go home.”
………………………………………….
Nicole kept her hand on her girlfriend’s knee the whole way back to the homestead, and by the time they pulled up the driveway, Waverly’s eyes were closed and her head was slumped on one shoulder. Nicole killed the ignition of the police cruiser, and leaned over to press a kiss to her girlfriend’s forehead; then another, lower, right between her eyes.
“Mmhmph,” Waverly mumbled adorably, blinking tired hazel eyes as the fuzzy outline of her girlfriend came slowly into focus.
“Hey cutie,” Nicole hummed softly. “We’re home.” Waverly didn’t say anything; but she smiled wearily, reaching out a hand and tracing her fingertips over her girlfriend’s face, across the soft line of her lips. Nicole trapped the hand in her own, kissing Waverly’s fingers one by one.
“How can you love me this much?” The smaller girl whispered, her exhausted eyes shining with emotion.
“I’ll spend the rest of our lives showing you, if you’ll let me,” Nicole replied, her calm confidence enveloping Waverly’s body with the warmth of a dozen bonus blankets. She may still struggle sometimes with feeling worthy of love…but worthy or not, she could never doubt that Nicole Haught loved her. Like, epic, storybook, fairytale-porno loved her.
“Yes, please,” Waverly murmured, leaning in across the console for a slow, soft, we-have-forever-to-do-this kiss. Nicole’s fingers ran through her hair, a strong arm slipping around her waist. Waverly sighed softly.
“C’mon baby, let’s get you inside okay? It’s freezing out here.” Nicole picked up one of Waverly’s hands in both her own, pressing a lingering kiss to her open palm before releasing her. They were apart only for as long as it took for them both to get out of the car and circle around to the front, arms snug around each other as they walked the short distance from the driveway to the front door.
Once inside, Nicole slipped Waverly’s coat off before shedding her own, hanging them both on the coat rack by the door. Then both her arms were back around her girl, and Waverly melted into her, tucking her dark head snugly under the taller girl’s chin. They stood like that for a moment, one of Nicole’s hands threading absently through Waverly’s silk-soft hair. When they finally broke apart, Waverly was rubbing her forehead again.
“Does your head hurt, baby?” Nicole asked gently, already knowing the answer.
“Just a little,” Waverly lied, her fingers moving from her forehead to her temples. Her eyes stung, her stomach twisted in on itself, her head was stuffed up and pounding. She really had cried herself sick.
“I think I know something that will make you feel better…c’mon upstairs,” the taller girl hummed, planting one more kiss on her girlfriend’s forehead as she hooked her fingers into the belt loops of Waverly’s jeans and tugged her forward. The youngest Earp went willingly, not even bothering to ask any questions, happy to let the girl who loved her be in charge right now. She followed Nicole up the stairs, hand in hand, and into the bathroom, where the redhead quietly turned on the shower as high as it would go. While the water heated up, Nicole gently pulled the bloodstained sweater over Waverly’s head, never tiring of the sight of her sweet girl’s long, honey-brown hair tumbling down her back as the sweater came up and off. The unfortunate puppy’s blood had soaked right through the soft material, leaving a red stain across Waverly’s stomach that made Nicole’s heart squeeze painfully. That’s not her blood, the tall cop reminded herself, pressing a lingering kiss to her baby’s forehead.
The rest of Waverly’s clothes came off one by one; bra, jeans, socks, underwear. Nicole was careful to keep her touch extra-gentle, making it clear without words that she wasn’t expecting anything in return, wasn’t trying to take advantage of how submissive Waverly was being right now to coerce her into shower sex, when it was so obvious that she was feeling lousy and fragile. When Nicole held the shower curtain open for her, Waverly just looked up at her with big, sad eyes and said, “aren’t you coming too?”
“Of course, baby. I just don’t want you to stand here getting cold,” the tall cop grinned, pressing a slow, adoring kiss to her forehead.
“’Kay,” Waverly agreed, with a small, shy smile as she slipped under Nicole’s arm and into the hot water. It felt like absolute heaven, and she let out a deep, guttural sigh as her eyes slid closed and all her muscles went limp. When Nicole climbed in after her a minute later, Waverly was still just standing there with her eyes closed, arms wrapped around herself, head bent forward so the water poured over the top of her head and down her back, flattening her long sheets of hair against her skin.
“Hey,” the redhead murmured gently, pressing their foreheads together under the hot water.
“Hey,” Waverly sighed back, reaching up to tangle her hands into her girlfriend’s tousled hair. Then she turned around and leaned back against Nicole’s taller body, drawing her girlfriend’s arms around her waist. Nicole was happy to just hold onto her like that, gently rubbing her stomach, letting Waverly lean on her both literally and emotionally while the hot water soothed the stiffness from her muscles and the pounding from her head.
When the water began to get cool, they climbed out, and Nicole wrapped her petite girlfriend up in a thick, fluffy towel before getting one for herself. Waverly sat on the edge of the tub and let Nicole dry her hair and gently comb the tangles out, and then waited patiently, quietly, while the redhead dried herself off, too. When they were both dry, their hair fresh and tangle-free, Nicole leaned down and kissed the end of Waverly’s nose, drawing a shy smile from the shorter girl.
“How’s your head feel now, hmm?” The taller girl asked, stroking her thumb over her girlfriend’s temple.
“Better…thanks for taking such good care of me.”
“Oh, I’m just getting started taking care of you, my baby,” Nicole hummed, pressing a kiss to the spot where her thumb had just been. Waverly leaned into the gentle touch like a cat. “C’mon…let’s get you all cuddled up in bed, and then I’ll make some vegan cocoa. Would you like that?”
“Uh-huh,” Waverly sighed, closing her eyes again, just for a moment, as she let her head drop against her girlfriend’s chest. Nicole kissed the top of her head, and lead her by the hand down the short hall to her bedroom, bundling her up in warm flannel pajamas and pulling her into the cozy bed.
“What do you think, do we need another bonus blanket?” the redhead teased gently when she had her girlfriend tucked snugly under a mountain of covers. “And some cocoa? I did promise you cocoa.”
“I don’t need any more blankets…or cocoa…I just need you,” Waverly murmured, her voice coming out small and fragile again as she reached one hand out from under the blankets and tugged on the leg of Nicole’s pajama pants.
“Well you got me…I am all yours.” Nicole slipped under the covers and gathered her angel’s small body against her. Waverly wrapped around her like a little weed, arm snaking around her waist, head on her chest. Nicole loved the warmth of her girlfriend’s breath against her skin.
“Thank you…” Waverly sighed, closing her eyes as Nicole’s gentle fingers began grazing through her hair again. “I’m sorry for being such a downer. You shouldn’t have to put up with this.”
“Baby, you are not a downer,” Nicole shook her head, drawing back a little to look into her girlfriend’s shining eyes. “You’re allowed to have feelings, Waves. You know that. You’re always there for everyone else, no matter what they’re going through…I wish you could be as good to yourself.”
“It’s hard,” Waverly admitted in a small voice. “I don’t like feeling like a burden…”
“You could never, in a million years, be a burden,” Nicole murmured fiercely, feeling hot tears pressing against the back of her eyes at the very thought of Waverly thinking such cruel thoughts about herself. “You, Waverly Earp, are the sun that lights up the sky…and, you know, even the sun gets stuck behind clouds now and then.” Waverly let out a croaky little laugh, a few fresh tears slipping down her cheek. Nicole leaned in and kissed them away.
“That’s really how you see me?” Waverly asked, putting her hand over Nicole’s against the side of her face and lacing their fingers together.
“Hell yes,” Nicole agreed without hesitation. “So you have to promise me you’ll remember—no matter how cloudy it gets, I’ll still be here loving you, my sunshine girl. And the clouds will pass, Waves…they always will. There’s no rush. Okay baby?”
“Okay,” Waverly agreed, her voice no longer sounding fragile and breakable. It did sound very sleepy, though. Nicole gathered her close again, pulling her in so she could nestle her head back into her favorite spot against the taller girl’s chest. Waverly sighed and made the soft, mumbly sounds she sometimes made when she was falling asleep, and Nicole’s heart swelled with love as her fingers threaded back through her girlfriend’s long hair.
“Hmmm…Nn’cole…” Waverly mumbled, drifting right up to the edge of sleep.
“Yeah, baby,” Nicole whispered into Waverly’s hair.
“You…be my sky?”
“Yeah, sunshine. I’ll be your sky.”