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Published:
2019-05-06
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Cryptid Lifeguard

Summary:

A little look into what could have been if Ardyn decided to wear red shorts and shades instead of layer upon layer of Chancellor's garb.

Notes:

-I worked as a lifeguard for three years in high school and just really think Ardyn could enjoy the job. With those strong kicking legs of his and arms that swing a broad sword like no one's business, he could pull anyone out of the water.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

 

How It Began

  • It’s all thanks to Verstael’s clone meat that Ardyn ever came upon the opportunity to work as a lifeguard. Once he had a couple of days to cool his head after the revelation of Ifrit’s memories, Ardyn had decided he really didn’t want to have anything to do with anyone. But especially those practicing the eating of fake food. Thus, the Adagium was reported missing as Ardyn gave the Empire the slip.

 

  • For several years Ardyn wandered the world that he had read about in his first seven months of freedom. First exploring Niflheim’s surrounding areas (in disguise of course as Verstael had the whole of the military after him), then Tenebrae's. Absorbing deamons and avoiding humans.

 

  • A couple of months in though, Ardyn realized  he was not suitable for hermit life, but also didn’t want to steal, so grudgingly, he interacted with people. Stopping in areas for a time to work odd jobs. But Ardyn soon found he was picking the jobs more for the experience than the pay per hour. His love for learning sparked, nothing kept Ardyn’s mind away from the bitter truth of the past.

 

  • He kept all co-workers at a distance though. He was not of their world.

 

  • There were still times though when an all-consuming rage would burn through him, hallucinations haunting him endlessly, only to leave him in a deep depressive state. It is in the tail end of one of those sessions, more a pity party, Ardyn was introduced to the profession of lifeguarding.

 

  • How was the person to know that floating haphazardly in water (coincidentally face down at the time), was the best medication for Ardyn to find release from the daemons? Leviathan was never a favorite, but he loved the lulling peace of water and how it seemed to take his worries away.

 

  • Roughly but efficiently pulled out of Altissia’s bay by an arm wrapped around his chest, Ardyn tried not to be too annoyed at his “savior.” They were clearly taxed from the effort and emotionally stressed. No doubt believing he was dead. If only.

 

  • What piqued Ardyn’s interest was how they did not ask for any restitution but were merely happy that he was okay. Just doing their job they said.  Leaving him only when it was apparent Ardyn was in no further need of medical assistance, and asking that he be careful of the boat traffic before taking a float in the bay, especially if face down.

 

  • Needing to understand just what a “lifeguard” was, as stated on the back of the person’s shirt as they walked off, it became his new obsession.

 

  • In short order from observation and research of the people designated to watch over those swimming, Ardyn decided to try out the lifeguard profession

 

 

Beginner Lifeguard

 

  • To allow him a longer time span at the job and a higher chance of being hired, (as it appeared most looked just past puberty but it was really hard to tell in this modern age) Ardyn made himself appear as a young nobody eighteen-year-old. And is successfully hired as a lifeguard trainee at Altissia’s largest public swimming area.

 

  • Ardyn passes his lifeguard training course with flying colors. Everyone chalking up his unending stamina and strength to youth. If only they really knew the reason he chuckled at the assumption.

 

  • Learning CPR blew Ardyn’s mind. That’s why his helpful lifeguard had been manhandling his face. The modern era really was a marvel.

 

  • Right away Ardyn takes the job serious, always diligent when on duty, but somehow also being able to resemble a cat bathing in the sun.

 

  • And he really does enjoy the sun. Even though his daemon changed flesh hates it. Whatever warmth leaks through the thickly applied sunblock Ardyn savors.

 

  • Initially, he was worried about the heavy exposure to sunlight that came with the job, but he is then introduced to a brand of sunblock that prevents completely any penetrations from the damaging rays. It had warnings all over the box about using limitedly since some sun exposure was needed for health and wellbeing...Ardyn paid it no mind with a smug smile. The lotion worked beautifully in preventing damage to his cells and reducing the miasma runoff.

 

  • Ardyn tried to stay aloof to his fellow team of lifeguards, but that was impossible for many reasons. First, they all had to be in good communication to be effective. Second, all of them, including the head lifeguard of 30+ years, were goofballs and broke into Ardyn’s stubborn heart with jokes and pranks.

 

  • Such comradery was something Ardyn thought he would never accept for fear of being hurt, but he just couldn’t hold onto that thought when watching his coworkers perform the best and only air guitar concert he has ever seen

 

  • For the next five years, Ardyn got better and better at lifeguarding and trusting others again. Never really did pick up the slang of the youth, but that became his novelty with the people he called friends.

 

  • It was with them where he was introduced to heavy lifting. An activity Ardyn would take part in after work, even though it wasn’t really needed or made a difference. More a habit that helped quiet his mind further, much like his old sword practice routines of old.

 

  • In turn he taught a those willing, how to play chess on breaks

 

  • After a time, with most of the original crew gone Ardyn decided to move on from Altissia.

 

  • He meant to try new jobs, but without fail he would fall back on lifeguarding the moment he saw (searched) a job opening. He couldn’t resist the lively work environment and satisfaction that came from saving innocent lives. No matter what his scourge induced nightmares tried to convince him of otherwise, Ardyn the healer wasn’t obsolete.

 

  • And this time it was completely feasible to save all those in need in his protection area. For Ardyn’s whole career, not one life was lost on his watch.

 

  • He knew without a doubt it was better than what his life would have been like in the cold Empire. Although they probably would have been more successful in the war with him there...but it didn’t really matter to him.

 

 

The experienced lifeguard

  • With twenty years passing, working three to five years in one spot as a lifeguard, Ardyn had worked at the most well-known beaches, lakes and outdoor pools from Tenebrae to Accordo. Never the same face or name.

 

  • If asked pool or beach, he answers beach every time. a. No chemical smell of chlorine. b. More challenging

 

  • The year of 747 M.E. was different though. Ardyn decided it was time to visit the land of his birth, and more specifically the Royal family’s city of Insomnia. And he would only go as himself...or at least mostly himself.

 

  • First stop was a hair salon to mark the occasion. Short hair was calling out to him.

 

  • Landing a job at the largest water recreation park in Insomnia went smoothly. Ardyn only using the slightest of illusion to appear younger, and providing paperwork none would question. He even went so bold as to use the name Ardyn Izunia.

 

  • He almost hoped Verstael would come for him in person, specifically on senior speedo Wednesday. Ardyn always participated out of principle.

 

  • Ardyn did not seek out the Lucis Caelums, but immersed himself in the lifeguard community.

 

  • As usual, his coworkers were easy to get along with. The sense of family settling on his shoulders with ease.

 

  • Ardyn took his usual role as the easy-going lifeguard who was deceptively serious.

 

  • He was the lifeguard who enforced the no running rule without hardly blowing his whistle. Those even just thinking of running would feel Ardyn’s gaze upon them. Daring them to run and see what happens.

 

  • Of the few who disobeyed the rules while Ardyn was on duty, they were personally escorted by Ardyn to the timeout corner.

 

  • It took Ardyn longer than it should during a couple of weeks in the summer to realize many of the people getting into trouble were old enough to know better. Old enough to try pick up lines on him…after that incident, Ardyn banning those not so innocent for the day, stopped the overabundance of rule breaking.

 

  • Ever serious about his job while on duty, he stayed professional. It only took a second to miss a little head going under the water and not coming back up. So he never returned any flirtatious comments, or that was his goal. But even the most monotone voice used seemed to please.

 

  • Ardyn didn’t hate the attention but was quite amazed at how much he was getting while in his natural appearance. He knew he wasn’t bad looking but to have people frequently fall into the pool because they were staring at him was obnoxious. But he didn’t hate the attention.

 

  • It wasn’t his fault he had to re-apply his sunblock every hour on the hour. Otherwise little tendrils of black miasma would leak from his pores.

 

  • And he knew he didn’t just affect the guests but also his coworkers. He was never without help in applying sunscreen to his back.

 

  • Ardyn is the stereotypical lifeguard who wears aviators. Even though they plagued him by getting caught in his hair, as he often pushes them up into it.

 

  • But the tan flop hat he wears throws off the intimidating look just a bit, but it has been with him since Altissia.

 

  • When on break or lunch, Ardyn usually takes a turn down the waterslide or floats in the deep end. A true love for water having formed after his years of working so closely by it.

 

  • If Ardyn is posted for lap swim, he always takes the opportunity to switch the speaker music to jazz. He knew some didn’t like stroking the smooth notes of a saxophone, but it was Ardyn’s favorite genre of all he has experienced. And it helped him not want to bang his head against his chair from the third repeat of the most popular pop song.

 

  • Just like the time of people causing trouble on purpose, there is another span of weeks where Ardyn finds he is jumping in the water to save those not so in need. This angered him. Not that it was taxing but others were put at jeopardy who may actually be in need. Ardyn had no mercy and banned those suspected of faking a drowning for a month. The head lifeguard in full agreement.

 

  • It didn’t lessen his popularity in the least.

 

  • Although it meant more exposed flesh to the skin, Ardyn always wore red lifeguard designated shorts, and a plethora of print tank tops. Ending up shirtless often throughout the day.

 

  • Ardyn’s collection of work tank tops is something he takes pride in. Not many understand his strange taste, ranging across twenty years, but he doesn’t expect anyone to.

 

  • His co-workers come to him first when needing a sub for work, because he never takes a day off and because he never declines to work for any section or activity. Be it the waterslides, indoor wave pool, divers end, swim team practice, water aerobics, and free swim.

 

  • Ardyn’s favorite extension of his lifeguarding duties was teaching. Be it training new lifeguards or swimming lessons, Ardyn great satisfaction in sharing knowledge. But there is nothing like watching a person swim on their own for the first time. The joy was infectious, and Ardyn needed as much of it as he can get.

 

  • He has worked as a manager before, but prefers not to be the wrangler of pool goers and troublesome lifeguards.

 

  • Out of everyone, Ardyn is the best at pranking from years of practice. But it is him against the whole crew (only fair) and they do come up with clever revenge pranks. Never will he live down blue week, a temporary dye activated by heat having been put into his sunscreen. Half his body was covered before Ardyn stopped their suspicious helpfulness.

 

  • His revenge was long on sweet after that. For weeks everyone was on their tiptoes, trusting nothing. Ardyn eventually called a truce when his coworkers were almost becoming too paranoid to work, but made it clear that his sunscreen was off limits.

 

  • His dubbed nickname is Cryptid or Crypt. It stuck only because of the truth his coworkers noted: his strange speech patterns, an agelessness to his face, and clearly an old soul. Ardyn was touched.

 

  • Living life as a lifeguard was a blessing for all.

 

  • Bahamut was not prepared for this.

 

  • Especially when the chosen King signed up for lifeguard training, taught by none other than “Crypt”  ;)

 

Notes:

Commissioned artwork by @craigthesaurus inspired by this AU.

 


ardyn (3)