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It was unforgiveable, what he’d done. Made an irreparable mistake. Betrayed his closest companions. Fell in league with the enemy.
It was unimaginable, what he’d caused to happen. Lorne unconscious on the floor. Justine wielding a glittering blade in the dark of the night.
Connor beyond rescue in a hell dimension, at the untender mercies of his father’s enemy.
His idiocy and ineptitude had nearly cost him his life.
Small enough price.
His stupidity and incompetence had cost Angel his son.
A price so great it could never be repaid.
He’d welcomed Angel’s smothering hands, welcomed death, even as he instinctively struggled. Welcomed Angel’s hatred.
But he lived. Damn it all, he’d lived.
Lived to see the light fade from the eyes of those he loved. Lived to see the pain he caused consume and overwhelm any good feeling they’d once had for him.
Lived to learn firsthand that the opposite of love is not hate.
It’s indifference.