Work Text:
Reigen finds Serizawa standing at the door of their apartment. Not an unusual thing in itself, but it’s too early for people to come calling. The sun is up, it’s not a workday… and the man on the other side of the door is talking to him in low tones. Reigen doesn’t hear what they’re saying, but Serizawa’s shoulders are tense, and his hand is clenched on the doorknob. Soft words pass between the threshold of their apartment, before Serizawa nods, thanks him, and shuts the door.
He stands there for a time, facing the door, shoulders slowly slumping.
Something’s wrong. Reigen doesn’t need to be a genius to determine that. He almost considers sneaking back to bed and pretending that he didn’t see this interaction, coming up with some excuse to ask about it later… but Serizawa turns around before he can do anything.
“Oh– Ara– you… saw that.” His fingers play with the hem of his shirt, not quite guilty, not quite innocent. “Sorry, I didn’t want to wake you.”
Well, his cover’s been blown now. He steps further into the main room, hugging himself. “Are you okay? What was that all about?”
Serizawa shakes his head. He looks haunted… disturbed. It shoots a pang of worry and helplessness through Reigen’s chest, wishing he could do something to help him feel better.
“Breakfast?” He changes the subject after Serizawa stays silent.
Serizawa nods, and the two of them make a breakfast together, Reigen trying to push the strange encounter to the back of his mind in the uneasy quiet of the apartment. It hasn’t felt like this in here for a long time now, and Reigen finds himself unnecessarily mad at whoever it was that knocked on their door and dared to disturb their peace. What right did he have, seeking Serizawa out and speaking words to dismantle him so? Who was he anyway?
The two of them sit in silence, eating breakfast as the sun rises, stripes of sunlight moving down and across the wall between them. Reigen shoots quick looks at Serizawa when he knows he’s not looking at him, trying to get a better read off of him. There’s something behind his eyes, that same haunted look, and it seems like he’s trying to process something. He takes bites sporadically, lost in thought.
Something is wrong.
As much as Reigen wants to know what this is all about… he doesn’t want to push it. He trusts Serizawa, and he knows Serizawa trusts him. He’ll tell him when he’s ready. A part of him just hopes he’s ready soon. He wants to help. He wants to be there for him. He wants to know how to be there for him.
Breakfast things are cleared and the day more or less begins as usual after that. Serizawa showers, Reigen sets his mind on groceries and what they need for the week, laundry is collected to be done, Reigen takes his turn in the bathroom, finds Serizawa cleaning up in the kitchen, quick chores around the place getting done, Reigen even opens the window to let the summer breeze in… it’d all be so normal if Serizawa weren’t so lost behind his eyes.
“Wanna come with? I’m gonna go get some groceries.”
Serizawa pauses in picking up some books to go back on a shelf, before speaking and continuing the motion. “I think I’d rather stay here and work on some homework, actually.”
So, Reigen doesn’t push it.
He leaves Serizawa with a kiss on the cheek.
---
Serizawa sits down on the couch like some defeated soldier, out of breath and numb.
He sits for a long time.
Thinking, not thinking… staring at the wall across from him.
There’s a lot to process, and he isn’t sure how to even start.
Perhaps he shouldn’t. Or at least, not now. Maybe he should actually work on homework, like he said he would. Yeah. Homework. He takes his book, his paper, his laptop, sets it up, not thinking just moving and… sits. Stares. Thinks and not thinks.
It’s been three years since he started working with Reigen. Two since they started dating. A month since they moved in together.
Funny how time passes. It seems longer and shorter. He’d been afraid they were moving too fast, and so had Reigen, but the thought of being apart was getting harder, and it just made sense to share a living space with where things were at. And yet, it’s already been a whole month and it feels like it’s been a lifetime.
It’s strange. Sad. Good. Bad.
He starts typing out in a word document, deletes it, tries something new, deletes it.
Eventually he gives up trying to write or read and just continues to sit.
The small apartment suddenly feels too big, too empty. A part of him wishes he were hiding under covers, wrapped tight, a kid again, hugged by a familiar darkness on all sides– safe. But he knows he’s safe now. He shouldn’t be like this. He shouldn’t be afraid… if that’s what this is. Is he scared? He shouldn’t be. If anything he should feel a weight off his chest, a freedom renewed, or something. But he doesn’t. He just has the sudden longing for some sort of home. A home that’s left to go get groceries. A home that isn’t there anymore. A home that can hug him, comfort him… enshroud him in darkness and quiet.
Time passes. A lifetime. He’s not sure how much.
When Reigen walks through the door, it hits Serizawa how entirely exhausted he is.
“...Hey, Katsuya. How’s homework?” Reigen shuts the door behind him with his foot, carrying a few bags of groceries to the kitchen.
Serizawa mumbles something noncommittal.
Moments pass, and Reigen steps out of the kitchen, gives him a worried look, and sits down next to him. Not saying anything, not touching, just looking up at him, examining his face with concern in his eyes. Serizawa has a hard time meeting his eyes.
He sighs, closing his eyes.
Reigen should know.
“Touichiro is dead.”
A soft gasp. Serizawa opens his eyes, head dizzy at the fact that he’d just said that, that it’s real, and true and… he has to process it and even though he’s said it, he still doesn’t know how to deal with this.
“Oh. That’s what that guy was here for…?”
Serizawa nods, laying back against the couch to stare at the ceiling. “Yeah. Said he died two days ago. Brain tumor that’s been dormant that suddenly… wasn’t.” He shakes his head. “I dunno how much is true coming from the government, but that’s what he said.”
Reigen leans back next to him, a hand on his arm. “Damn. That’s… a lot to take in.”
“You can say that again.” Serizawa half laughs, feeling numb and a little too close to hysterics for his liking. “It’s almost funny. I… I was always so sure that when he died, I’d be dead too. Because he was so strong and I figured if anyone could kill him, I’d be long gone before him. And I never really stopped believing that until this morning.”
The hand on his arm squeezes, reassuring him in the following silence.
He wipes a hand down his face, eyes shut tight. “God. This is gonna hit Shou like a wall of bricks when he finds out. If he doesn’t know already.”
“He’s strong, though,” Reigen says. “And so are you. You’ll get through this, okay? It might take some time, but I know you. You’re a perseverer.”
Serizawa keeps his eyes shut a little longer. It’s as if opening them will be the final straw in admitting he has to deal with this somehow, but he does open them, turning his head to look at the man sitting next to him, a wonderful presence in his life and a good person. He gives him a shaky smile, a bubbling of emotions breaking through the numbness before he buries his face in Reigen’s shoulder, not quite crying but not dry-eyed either.
Reigen holds him close as he deals with it, and Serizawa never wants to let go.