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Toni Topaz stood up, stretching her arms as she took a step away from Cheryl’s bed. She could not quite call it her bed yet. Cheryl had only invited her to move in with her a few days ago after the pink-haired vixen had a seizure at Riverdale High. For the last few mornings, she would take a few minutes to survey her surroundings after her girlfriend left the room. The crimson and velvet colors sang sweet songs that reminded Toni that this was the redhead’s sacred territory, her ruby temple, her Holy of Holies where only the chosen ones were allowed to enter and worship the goddess that is Cheryl Blossom. Toni was grateful for the privilege to live with her lover but there was something that made the poor girl feel uneasy.
When Toni was a young girl, she would borrow their neighbor’s old Disney VHS tapes and watch the Disney Princess movies in her grandpa’s living room. She remembered the nights when the two would make jokes about the poorly drawn women on screen and mock how these women needed a relationship to change their economic situation. She used to wonder if something like that could happen in real life. Her grandfather would later point out it did for Alice Smith when she married Hal Cooper after high school. Of course, it would happen for a pretty blonde heterosexual woman. He told her that could never happen for someone like Toni and in a way, she did not want it to.
Now everyone morning she was waking up next to the most beautiful girl in the world. It was an amazing feeling to open her eyes and her first sight of the day was Cheryl. Seeing the way the redhead’s eyelashes fluttered as she slept was one of the most adorable things the pink-haired Vixen ever seen. Sometimes Toni wondered what would happen if the two women were waking up in a trailer instead of the Thistle manor. The idea of waking up with Cheryl in her arms with no space between them (because the bed in her mobile home was very small) seemed nice to Toni. That’s how she always imagined it. Holding the girl or guy she loved in their small little trailer. There was nothing wrong with lying in a huge, red draped California King bed with the woman in red but Toni had to admit that was a huge bed just for two teenagers.
She remembered when she would jump off the couch in her grandpa’s trailer, walk barefoot on the hard pavement to grab the local newspaper from her neighbor’s mailbox before one of the neighborhood boys beat her to it. The young Toni would run back to the trailer, wait for her grandfather to wake up and then spend the morning on his lap as he criticized how Hal and Alice Cooper crafted articles to demonize the Southside. The bond between Toni and her grandfather established the foundation of her morals especially since one of her parents had died and the other was rarely in her life. The one thing her grandpa taught her was how to live without money, how to cut corners when the funds weren’t there and how to appreciate the little trinkets she could afford. Everyone around the Southside seemed to share that mindset. Maybe that’s why it was odd to see Cheryl recklessly spend her money (or at least reckless to Toni). The two had a vastly different upbringing.
Toni stretched her arms out as she heard a familiar voice call her name. She turned around and smiled as she watched Cheryl enter the bedroom in the short silk crimson nightgown that accentuated her supple bosoms, small waist, and curvy hips. The ginger placed a hand on a hip while playfully waving a finger at her girlfriend.
"Good morning sleepyhead," she said. "Aren't you a little autumn flower?"
"Not everyone can blossom as early as you," Toni joked.
Cheryl smirked before she walked over to her vanity. She sat at the stool, before pushing her hair away from her porcelain face. Toni could see her girlfriend looking at her in the mirror.
"Mon amour," Cheryl began as she reached for one of the makeup bottles in front of her. "I do wish you would wake earlier for me. Oh, how I miss the times JJ and I would sneak out our rooms and watch the sunrise together."
"Is that what you sneak off to do every morning?" Toni asked as she walked over towards the end of the bed. She meant it in a teasing way but it came across as more of an accusation.
"Awe, don't worry rug muffin," Cheryl said as she dabbed primer onto her angelic face. "Nana Rose and I always go at dawn. Sometimes, she starts rambling in French but it gives me a chance to practice."
"I see," Toni stated.
Toni felt a little ashamed for the way she spoke to her lover. She knew that Cheryl did not take any offense to her accidental accusation. An apology would make it seem less like a Freudian slip and more like a serious question from a jealous and possessive girlfriend.
As she sat on Cheryl’s luxurious crimson bedroom bench, she wondered if a part of her wanted to scold Cheryl for leaving her alone every morning. Toni assumed that the two would spend their mornings cuddling in bed until it was time to get ready for school. Cheryl woke up surprisingly early and Toni was not accustomed to waking up before sunrise. Every morning Toni was awakened by Cheryl, the two would exchange a kiss before Cheryl moved out of bed and left the room. Toni was startled by this at first but she would quickly turn over and fall back to sleep until the alarm on her phone rang. Then, she would wake up alone in a bedroom that was not hers. Unfortunately, her little bombshell had the same routine even on weekends. Without Cheryl’s presence, she felt like a ragdoll on a shelf next to a porcelain doll. When Cheryl was next to her, Toni could focus on their love. The minute the Southside native was alone in any of the rooms in the Thistle manor, the glaring difference between Cheryl’s and her socioeconomic standing was blinding.
Toni plopped an arm down on one of the chair’s frilly armrests as she unsuccessfully tried to push away her insecurities. She stared directly at Cheryl’s face in the mirror, waiting for the ginger to say something. Toni needed something to distract her from her thoughts. Luckily, Cheryl noticed a change in her behavior and Toni was grateful to have such an attentive girlfriend.
"Oh, ma chérie!" Cheryl nearly squealed. "We should go shopping today. I am in dire need of Balenciaga. I cannot be seen in Louboutins again after little miss Eva Peron was spotted wearing the same Louboutins as me."
Toni held back the groan that she wanted to make. Shopping was the last thing she needed right now. She always felt slightly overwhelmed when she saw the price tags of the items that Cheryl wanted to buy. Yes, her girlfriend was entitled to buy all the expensive items she wanted. Unfortunately, Toni could not stop thinking about how many of her neighbors’ rent could be paid with the amount Cheryl would spend on a single outfit. Another part of Toni knew she would feel guilty if she went shopping with Cheryl. She could not afford anything in the stores they went to and Cheryl would volunteer to buy her clothes. Although that was sweet, Toni did not want to feel like she was using Cheryl for her money. When it came to shopping, there was no middle ground. Cheryl would not want to shop at the stores that Toni could afford which was mostly thrift shops and other alternative stores on the Southside. Shopping was not a hobby they could enjoy together. Toni needed to come up with something else.
"Or maybe we could just spend the day watching Netflix and stuffing our face?" Toni suggested. "I hear Black Mirror is really good."
"Good idea snaggle puss," she said. "Let's pencil that in for sometime next week. So I was thinking, should we could get mani-pedis before buying shoes or after?"
Toni sighed and looked down at her gray pajama shorts. She studied the worn and fringe fabric. She should have expected that Cheryl would double down on her desire to go shopping. After all, that was the head Vixen’s favorite pastime. She did not want Cheryl to change herself to make the poorer female feel comfortable and Toni did not want to have to alter herself to fit in with Cheryl. As much as Toni wanted to avoid confrontations in her romantic relationships, she knew she was going to have to explain herself to the paler woman.
"Babe,” Toni began. “I don't feel like going out today."
"Oh," Cheryl exclaimed as she turned her head around to face the other girl.
"Listen, Cheryl -"
"Uh-oh."
"No, nothing like that."
"Then, what is it TT?"
Toni lowered her head for a second and took a deep breath as she tried to figure out how to delicately explain this insecurity to the crimson beauty in front of her. The last thing Toni wanted was to say something that would set Cheryl off. The thought of Cheryl becoming enraged and kicking the other female out slightly scared Toni. If the ginger decided that the relationship was too much, nothing was stopping her from putting the pink-haired Vixen on the streets. Toni knew that Cheryl would probably never do that but the possibility of that was still frightening to the teen. After all, Toni lost almost everyone and everything that she cared about. She could not lose Cheryl. Toni looked back up at Cheryl and took another deep breath before she resumed talking.
"I just don't want you to have to spend all your money on me,” Toni stated.
It was clear to Toni that Cheryl did not understand how much of a big deal this was to her. Cheryl waved a dismissal hand and chuckled.
"Awe, my little power puff,” Cheryl cooed. “Don't worry about the money."
Toni sighed much to Cheryl’s confusion. There had to be a way that Toni could make Cheryl realize that money was the root of the problem. The Southside native had to admit it was a little challenging trying to explain to an heiress why the Blossom's abundant amount of luxury was making this trailer park resident feel uncomfortable.
"Baby,” Toni began, speaking slower this time. “I know you love spoiling me but I am not the type of girl that is won over by glitter and diamonds."
“It’s no problem. It’s fun for me to buy you stuff. Now I don’t have to just spend it all on me.”
“It’s kind of overwhelming to me.”
“Oh, what’s the problem specifically? Maybe we can fix it.”
“The money.”
There was a moment of silence as both girls stared at each other. Toni knew the issue she was bringing up was an exact opposition to what Cheryl valued. There was no way the two could come up with a simple solution to resolve this.
"What do you want?” Cheryl asked. She furrowed her eyebrows and turned her head sideways.
Now Toni was becoming a little frustrated. There was a limited amount of ways that she could use to convey that Cheryl’s wealth and frivolous spending was overwhelming the darker-skinned girl.
"I just want something normal like -" Toni began before she was interrupted. She was a little annoyed that Cheryl spoke over her but she probably should not have used the word “normal.” That may have made Cheryl feel a little alienated.
"Honestly,” Cheryl said, raising her voice slightly to interrupt her girlfriend. It was obvious to Toni that she just wanted her lover to drop the subject. “Don't worry about the money. It's coming from my bitch of a mother. She's paying for all the Prada, Versace and Dolce & Gabbana."
Toni's eyes widened as she shook her head. A part of her knew this was just her insecurities blinding her from allowing herself from enjoying her stay at the Thistle manor. A part of her did not want to admit that she was glad that she was out of the Southside and out of a dangerous neighborhood. Those thoughts would make her a traitor to the place she called home for so long. She could not allow herself to think that way so she decided to focus on the reason that Cheryl was dismissing her.
"So you're using me to get back at Penelope?" she asked a little louder than she would have liked.
"What?” Cheryl asked. She jumped up and walked over to Toni. “No honey. I just -"
"What Cher!” Toni asked as she stood up, face-to-face with her redhead.
Cheryl took a step back and wrapped her arms around herself.
"Oh come on mon petit amour,” Chery exclaimed.
"I'm serious," Toni stated as she placed both hands on her hips.
The two women stared at each other for a second.
"Okay, “ Cheryl receded. “We could stay in and watch that Black Window thing you were talking about."
Toni groaned, placed a hand on her forehead. She needed to finish this conversation with Cheryl no matter how painful it was.
"What am I?” she asked. “Some experiment to you?"
Toni sat back down on the bedroom bench, shaking her head as she questioned if Cheryl cared about her.
"Not at all. You're my Pinkie Pie.”
"Please tell me that dating me is not some attempt to piss off your mom."
Although Toni knew in her heart that was not true, she could not help wondering why a prestigious and pristine Northside heiress would decide to date a girl from the “wrong side of the city.” Cheryl did not even like Toni when they first met. It was only after they saw “Love, Simon” that Cheryl started treating Toni would kindness. It was not long after that did they start dating. Was Cheryl just using Toni to break all the taboos with?
"TT," Cheryl started as she sat next to Toni. "My happiness is an act of rebellion against mother dearest. I'm practically a Benedict Arnold to her for just being me. She'll never be happy with my choices and that's okay because I have you and Nana Rose to get me through her dictatorship. You are my world. Mon mondre."
Cheryl lowered her voice when she spoke the french version of "my world."
Toni nodded and looked up at Cheryl as the redhead placed a hand on the poor girl’s thigh. The pink-haired woman looked into her lover’s eyes and felt ashamed for the things she said.
"Awe babes,” Toni whispered and she embraced the other woman. Cheryl pulled her closer to her and the two held each other for what felt like minutes. “I’m sorry for all the mean things I said. I can’t believe I said any of that.”
The two pulled away from each other’s embrace.
“It’s okay,” Cheryl said.
“You mean it?”
“Of course.”
Toni shook her head again and gently grabbed Cheryl’s hand. It was interesting that Toni was the irrational one in this situation and Cheryl was the one trying to reason with her. This was what fear did to people. Anxiety clouded her judgment and made her imagine all of the worst-case scenarios. Toni was not usually the one that let fear control her. Maybe, it was her closeness to the other woman that scared her. Perhaps, she was too afraid to love Cheryl because deep down she felt like if she loved Cheryl, she’ll betray what she was taught to believe. It was not Cheryl who was going against everything her mother taught her. It was Toni who was turning against her late grandpa. She was becoming the very thing he told her to never become - the Cinderella stereotype that left everything she knew for something that glittered like gold.
As Toni contemplated her situation, she could feel Cheryl’s eyes on her.
"Seriously, Toni,” Cheryl started. “Are you alright? Something’s wrong."
"Sorry babes. It's just … I'm not used to all this money. I guess some of it makes me uncomfortable."
That was partially true and she knew Cheryl could tell that money was one part of the problem.”
"Do you feel like I am buying your love?" Cheryl asked in a hushed tone.
Her voice sounded so soft and Toni knew she was concerned. She wished she could say something to reassure her porcelain goddess but she only could say exactly what she was feeling.
"I don't know,” Toni whispered while leaning closer to Cheryl. “I just never lived like this before. I feel like a post-Charming Cinderella."
Cheryl placed a hand on the around the pink-haired girl’s shoulder and pulled her closer until Toni’s head rested on Cheryl’s shoulder.
"Well, you are my bubblegum princess."
"I think I am more of a Marceline,” Toni said with a small chuckle.
"Look, if money is making you uncomfortable, we can compromise."
“Compromise?” Toni asked.
“Yes,” Cheryl answered. “Compromise. I don’t want to lose you.”
"Like moving to the Southside and living in a trailer."
There was a brief pause. Toni mentally kicked herself and felt like she went too far. There was no way a bombshell like Cheryl would give up her wealth. Toni did not want it to seem like she was telling Cheryl to choose between their relationship and her inheritance.
"Uh, I didn't plan on doing a reverse rag to riches but for you -"
"Joking babe,” Toni quickly said as she sat up and moved out of Cheryl’s embrace. She faced her lover as she stated, “I wouldn't want you to live somewhere where you're uncomfortable."
Cheryl, without skipping a beat, exhaled and her eyes brightened.
"Thank God,” she cheered. “Ugh … I would not be able to stand overhearing Mr. True Detective and Ms. Nancy Drew bump uglies in the trailer next to us."
Toni could not help but smile.
"Jughead doesn't live that close,” Toni reassured.
"That's still close enough. I can envision myself projectile vomiting after seeing Betty Boop do her walk of shame when I'm watching the sunrise."
Toni did not necessarily need that visual in her head.
"I get it, babe."
Cheryl nodded and then clapped her hands together.
"Well, what's the compromise since moving seems out of the question for now?"
Toni knew that there was little Cheryl could do to resolve this situation. The person that needed to change was Toni. She was the one that had to confront her insecurities. Yet, she could not admit that to her girlfriend right now.
"How about ... fewer shopping trips and more cuddling?" Toni suggested as she reached over and ran her thumb across Cheryl’s cheek.
"Although I could use a new ensemble to upstage Frida Shallow -"
"Who?"
"Lodge."
"Ah."
"I'd rather spend the day snuggling with my carebear.”
"Awe, you're my tender heart bear. Love you."
"Love you too, my love-a-lot bear."
Toni gazed into her lover’s brown eyes as she slowly leaned closer to the femme fatale in front of her. She could smell the cinnamon body spray that the redhead loved to use. There was a warm sensation as the two drew closer together. Her hands reached out and she could feel the thin silk nightgown that was concealing her girlfriend’s body underneath her fingertips. Toni’s eyes flutter shut as her lips touched the infamous ruby red mouth in front of her. The caress of Cheryl’s lips were so soft and tender that Toni's heart began to beat faster in her chest. Her hands glided down the woman in red’s slender frame until her hands traveled back up to cup the girl’s porcelain face. She could feel Cheryl’s lips form a grim against hers just before Cheryl pulled back.
“What is it, babe?” Toni asked.
“You didn't tell me what else was bothering you?” Cheryl asked. “Money couldn’t just be the only thing."
Cheryl could not let anything slide and Toni respected that. She had hoped that they had resolved their little argument but she knew that she did not address the part she needed to. She should not keep the real reason behind this new insecurity of hers a secret especially from the love of her life.
“You’re right,” Toni admitted. That admission brought another smile on Cheryl’s face. “I feel like I am betraying the Southside and my grandpa by living in the land of luxury. Like I am going to assimilate to the Northside and lose my roots.”
“Trust me, my love,” Cheryl began. “I will never ask you or want you to lose who you are. I love you and I chose you because of what you embody. I need that in my life and I will never want to see you let go of the Southside.”
“Awe, that means a lot to me.”
“It means a lot to me, too.”
Toni could not help herself. She pulled Cheryl closer to her and gave the girl another long kiss.