Chapter Text
Out of all the meet-up spots in the monastery, the sound of clashing steel made the training grounds the less than ideal place for a conversation. Though, Byleth realized, that may have been the point.
The war had officially come to an end and people were swarming back to the church to take a look at their new leader. Though the celebrations were not lavish due to low supplies, there was an almost tangible feeling of joy and relief in the air. Despite this, Byleth couldn’t help but feel that she was out of place there.
To go from a mercenary, to professor, to a church leader... That wasn’t exactly the career path she had in mind, though this caused her to wonder if she had one in mind to begin with. Thinking about her muddled, apathetic past made her uneasy, so she pushed it to the back of her thoughts again.
It wasn’t unusual for her and Felix to train together, but in light of recent events, people were beginning to wonder why they would train at all. They were practically the only people to go there since the end of the war a month ago. It was a given that this was because they didn’t know Felix as well as she did, but his cold demeanour didn’t exactly help with the negative comments.
Byleth mindlessly ran her hand across the handles of the wooden training swords left to collect dust in a bin. She fondly recalled the first time she and Felix sparred. He demanded that they use the steel swords because he saw no point in using the blunt wooden weapons. The sudden challenge threw her off a little, especially since she had only just begun teaching. She didn’t really know how to spar either, so Felix ended up thrown against the ground due to her poorly restrained strength. He was frustrated with himself, but she saw his eyes light up in excitement as well. “Finally,” He gasped out between laboured breaths. “A worthy opponent.”
She couldn’t help but laugh a little at the memory. Despite his initial cold impression, she found him to be quite sensitive at heart. His prickly personality made for some interesting interactions over the years and made the softer moments between them seem much sweeter.
That last thought caused Byleth to furrow her brows and she abruptly stopped her hand. Did she find him sweet? His whole demeanour screamed everything but sweet at first glance. They had their fair share of arguments because of his nature, but something about him kept her close. She admired his ambition despite the slightly harsh way of voicing it, and she wanted to be there to see him achieve it.
The sweeter moments would usually happen during tea. She insisted on it before or after every training session in an attempt to get him to relax a little. Though he usually complained about being dragged to tea, he never really made a move to avoid it, so she figured he actually enjoyed it and just was too proud to admit it. When he was a student, he’d always sigh and ask, “why am I here?” Nowadays, he didn’t complain at all and even greeted her with a slight smile. Something told her that smile was rarely seen by others.
Byleth quietly laughed to herself again when she realized that the bar seemed really low. But she knew that, for Felix, the smallest actions spoke volumes. If she could have it her way, she’d want him to be a little more forthcoming, but the way he showed his contentment in her company was enough.
“I’m here.”
Felix’s voice snapped her out of her reminiscing, and she became flustered when she realized she had been thinking only about him for the past few minutes. She cleared her throat and hoped that her face wasn’t advertising her last few thoughts. “Felix. Hello. Ready to train?”
He immediately noticed something was off with her and raised a brow. “Yeah,” he hesitated a moment, “are you?”
Byleth nodded and rushed to grab a sword. She silently cursed for getting herself in an odd mood with all the nostalgia. Desperate to divert his attention, she asked, “how was your day today?”
“Fine.”
Well, that… certainly didn’t help. He was never really one for conversation, so she didn’t know what answer she expected. She fumbled with the hilt of the sword before turning to face Felix but, to her dismay, he was staring skeptically at her.
“Your face is red. If you’re sick, you should have stayed in.” he sighed, finally averting his gaze. “It’d be annoying to be out the only capable training partner,”
Byleth’s head had been swirling with worries ever since the end of the war, but there had always been something nagging at the back of her brain since they reunited a year ago. Paying close attention to him was no longer just out of worry. Hoping that their next session would come early wasn’t to get extra training in. Felix had become an essential part of her life and she didn’t know how to feel about it.
She was pulled out of her thoughts for the millionth time that day when she noticed Felix approaching her, hiding his growing concern behind a tight-lipped frown. “Don’t try to say you’ll be fine. Come on, I’ll walk you back to your room.”
“No. No, I’m really ok,” she tried to reassure him, trying to ignore the drumming in her ear. “I’m just a little anxious about... some of the changes around here.”
That technically wasn’t a lie, but Felix eyed her warily, holding his hand out and gesturing to the sword she had in her grasp, “that’s even worse. There’s no point in training if you won’t be able to keep a steady hand.” there was a beat of silence, as if he was mulling something over in his head. “We can just go straight to having some tea since you love that so much. I’m sure it’ll help with your nerves.”
Byleth couldn’t find a valid reason to refuse that wasn’t as embarrassing as, “I got worked up over memories of us,” so she simply nodded.
This was an objectively worse place for her nerves. Sure, at the training grounds she had a literal sword in hand, but now she was trapped in her room with Felix for some quality, intimate, one-on-one time in a confined space. She bumbled around the room, pulling out treats and the container of pine tea she had gotten just for Felix. At the very least, going through the motions of making tea helped her calm down. She sat across from him, placing the fresh pot of tea down on the table.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t train today,” Byleth fiddled with her teacup, feeling guilty that remembering things got her so riled up to the point it rendered her useless.
“Don’t apologize,” he muttered. “Just... get better soon... so we can go back to training.” He rushed out the last part like it was a last-minute addition. A familiar silence surrounded them as they both took a sip of tea. Byleth smiled to herself. Felix had an odd way to go about voicing his concern, but she got the hint.
A memory that refused to be ignored suddenly popped into her mind that caused her to laugh and choke on her tea. The scene that transpired with Felix at the Goddess Tower 6 years ago was suddenly screaming for her attention. Felix shot up from his chair and made his way over to her side, alarmed. She tried to wave him off and gesture that she was ok, but the waves of laughter hadn’t subsided yet. Felix seemed to be at a loss for what to do, but quickly realized that she was just laughing at something. Annoyed, he grunted, “what? What’s so funny?”
Before she could help herself, she choked out, “Do you remember what happened at the Goddess Tower that night six years ago?”
He furrowed his brows in confusion, but his eyes widened once he realized what she was referring to. A tinge of red graced his face. “...yes,” he scowled, “I remember.”
“When you swore to defeat me?”
“Yes...”
“When you used the vow that people usually use for declarations of love to swear my demise?”
“Ok, that’s enough.”
He huffed in annoyance and turned away from her, but she could still see the slight blush creeping up to his ears. She had a feeling that he was reaching his embarrassment limit and immediately sobered up. The last thing she wanted to do was tease him so much that he left. “Do you think you achieved it?” She quickly asked, trying to pull him back to the table.
That seemed to do the trick. He sat back down in his seat and tiredly met her gaze. He began stirring his tea mindlessly and muttered, “no, not by a long shot,” He continued when he noticed Byleth was going to interject with something disgustingly motivational. “Shouldn’t you know? You train with me every day, so why are you asking me?”
Byleth took a sip from her cup and began carefully. “I don’t know the exact requirements you have in mind. You’ve beaten me plenty of times now, but you still don’t seem satisfied,” she enjoyed the warmth from the tea for a moment before going on. “Makes me wonder if that was actually- “
Wonder if that was actually what your pledge was. She stopped herself from continuing that thought out loud. The look on Felix face was inscrutable, but she knew he wouldn’t like what she was suggesting.
“You’re a terrible rival,” Felix finally bit out after a long moment of silence. “You’re such a gracious loser that it makes me sick. The handful of times I did beat you, you looked ecstatic. Rivals should detest me - to some degree - and, more importantly-“ he drummed his fingers on the table impatiently, “-have the same amount of drive to defeat me.”
Byleth looked on in surprise, mouth opening and closing in an attempt to wrap her mind around it. She was finding it hard to not take the things he said personally, but held on when she remembered that the last person he was determined to catch up to was his now deceased brother, Glenn. Maybe this situation with her as the nearly unbeatable opponent was too familiar to the one with his brother.
Felix was genuinely the only “rival” she’d ever had. Not to mention, she'd only started experiencing deeper emotions after coming to the monastery, so she didn’t know how to act in general. In her mercenary days, her self-appointed rivals were just criminals looking to boast about defeating the Ashen Demon. There was no fondness there. This concept of friendly rivalry was still very new to her.
She didn't have to try as hard as he did since she was already ahead by default. Knowing his prideful nature, however, she sort of understood that that's where his frustration was coming from. It certainly wasn't that she never felt competitiveness, but she never really expressed it. Rather, it would quickly be overtaken with joy at his advancements.
“I’m sorry,” Felix sighed out an apology before she could reply. “I didn’t mean for it to be accusatory.”
The way he was refusing to meet her eyes told her he was still upset, but he seemed to regret his outburst. “Maybe,” She hummed in thought, eyeing his face carefully. “Maybe rival isn’t the right word.”
Felix looked up at her quizzically, so she took it as an invitation to continue. “I want to see you improve. I want to cheer you on. I get worried when you’re sent out on a mission without me, and when I’m on a mission without you, all I can think of is how much better it would be with you there,” she hesitated when she saw Felix’s eyes dart up in surprise, but kept going when she realized that this had been swirling in her mind for quite some time and needed to be said. “I’m not sure that’s the kind of rivalry you were hoping for.”
Now it was Felix’s turn to be at a loss for words. He was sitting stiff in his chair, his hands frozen in place on the table, and avoiding her gaze again. She couldn’t place what expression he was making, but she knew she had seen it somewhere before.
Suddenly, the loud battering at the door caused them to jump up and swirl toward the sound. It was accompanied by a muffled yell.
“Professor! Thieves have shown up in the village below Garreg Mach!”
Without another word, the two of them bolted out the door, nearly knocking over the guard who alerted them. They ran past frenzied civilians and soldiers to get to the stables. Byleth was a little ashamed to admit that she’d missed being on the front lines with her friends. It was so dangerous, and lives were at stake, but nothing could beat the rush of pride and relief when she successfully led and protected them. She knew Felix missed it too.
A lot of cavalrymen were already in position, ready to depart, and it left very few stallions left. The captain of the cavalry nearly collapsed when Byleth approached her (a lot of people were star struck by her nowadays), but helpfully pointed to a horse that they were free to use.
“Isn’t that Dorte?” Byleth sputtered incredulously, causing the captain to begin apologizing profusely. “Marianne is never going to forgive us.”
“Dorte is far safer with us,” Felix grunted as he mounted the saddle on the horse, beginning to buckle it in place. “We won’t be riding him into battle. We just need him to get us to the village.”
Felix offered his hand to help her get onto the saddle, but she hesitated with one foot in the stirrup. Her dad may have been a renowned cavalier, but she certainly wasn’t. Felix, thankfully, seemed to sense her reluctance and had gotten on first. However, she should’ve known his limited patience would run thin, Felix let out an irritated sigh before grabbing her hand and quickly pulling her up. She unwittingly let out a surprised squeak, which Felix returned with an amused look. She could feel her face burning as Felix turned away to look ahead.
Byleth barely got her other foot in the stirrup before Dorte started moving. The air was knocked out of her in shock even though they were just at a trot. She quickly wrapped her arms around Felix’s waist, trying to steady herself, and she felt him tense. She was far too concerned with not falling off to bother thinking about that further. Perhaps, she thought bitterly, it wasn’t that she didn’t like horseback riding.
They were able to ride ahead of the cavalry units since they still had to organize themselves. She couldn’t help but bury her face into Felix’s back, hugging him closer as they headed to the gates. Despite the fear that had pooled in the pit of her stomach, she felt her heart tinge at the fact that this was probably the most physical contact they’d had. Aside from brawling of course.
A wolf whistle prompted Byleth to lift her head and look for its source. Her eyes were a little misty from having them closed for so long, but they finally managed to focus on another cavalier beside them. She scoffed but couldn’t stop her smile when she realized who it was. “Sylvain?”
“Hey, professor!” He chirped, grinning at her. He was one of the few who still chose to call her that. He directed that same dazzling smile at Felix. “And who could this be?”
“Not now, Sylvain,” Felix hissed, seeming to dread that he couldn’t go any faster in such a busy area. She still had the side of her head pressed against his shoulder, so she could feel the vibrations when he talked.
Sylvain let out an airy laugh as he steadily matched their pace. “I guess I’m interrupting something, huh?”
Byleth rolled her eyes again but was flustered over what he was suggesting. “Are you heading to the village too?” She asked, hoping to change the topic for Felix’s sake.
The carefree look on his face dissipated when he replied. “Of course. I happened to be heading out anyway when I overheard and saw you two running to the stables,” his eyes darted to Felix. “I figured you two would just rush in there without waiting for the knights.”
“They’re just thieves,” Felix grunted, “we can handle it.”
The “we” seemed to throw Sylvain in for a loop as well. Normally, given the chance, Felix would insist he could handle it alone. While it left Byleth pleasantly surprised, a devilish smile settled on Sylvain’s lips.
“Seems like an odd first date,” he began, almost cooing. “Most people like being taken to dinner, you know.” Feeling her face heat up again, Byleth unconsciously tightened her grip around Felix. She knew that Sylvain liked to bother Felix about their training sessions. He’d always wink at the mention of them as if the sessions were some sort of romantic rendezvous. Byleth was always surprised that Sylvain could walk away from Felix mostly unscathed after teasing him like that.
It was at that moment that they were past the gates. Felix uttered a curse at Sylvain that Byleth could never repeat before urging Dorte to a gallop, and Sylvain’s laughter was drowned out by the sound of hooves clacking on the stone road. He didn’t seem to make an effort to catch up this time and instead kept a steady distance from them.
If it weren’t for the fact that they were heading toward a skirmish, she would’ve considered the situation quite lovely. The sun was just beginning to set, splashing the skies with vibrant and warm tones. This would be a scene she’d tuck carefully at the back of her mind to reminisce on later.
Byleth loosened her grip once she realized Felix’s presence had successfully distracted her from her newly discovered fear of horseback riding. She hummed happily to herself, thinking about how wonderful it was that someone could make you enjoy something that you once dreaded.
However, Felix seemed to think that her loosening her grip meant something bad. He slowed down a little and glanced at her over his shoulder, worried. “What’s wrong?”
Byleth went to reply but her voice died in her throat when she realized how close their faces were, especially since she was leaning her head on his shoulder. She spent what seemed like an agonizingly long time drinking in the view. Did he always look that tired? And how is it that it looks so good on him? Were angular features supposed to be this inviting? His dark, windswept hair, tired eyes, and lips permanently etched into a slight frown somehow made all her mind buzz with... affection?
She should’ve expected the ride to be a bit bumpy, but a particularly rough bump ungraciously snapped her out of her thoughts. Felix was still observing her with an incredulous look on his face, but the fondness in his eyes caused a surge of confusing feelings to cloud her mind again. She managed adjusted her grip on him and swallowed down the fluttery feeling in her chest, giving him a reassuring nod. “I’m ok. You should keep your eyes on the road, though.”
Felix reluctantly tore his eyes away from hers and she let out a shuddering breath she didn’t know she was holding. Something happened just now, and she couldn’t possibly begin to unpack it.
As they were nearing the village, they passed by people who were trying to flee. Unfortunately, Felix and Byleth couldn’t stop completely. She could only leave them with a few reassuring words and directed them to the monastery. However, just simply seeing the “knights” heading toward their home to save it seemed to relieve them.
“We have to walk from here,” Felix muttered, signalling Dorte to come to a halt. “He’ll be safe,” Felix added when he noticed Byleth’s conflicted expression. He hopped off easily and looked back up at Byleth, raising an eyebrow. She immediately knew he was challenging her to get off by herself.
With a defeated huff, she shakily lifted her leg over the saddle, the other balancing her precariously on the stirrup. It was suddenly very clear to her that she should not have done that because Dorte’s annoyed attempt at regaining his balance caused her to lose her grip. Thankfully, Felix managed to catch her easily before she hit the ground. She quickly wrapped her arms behind his neck for support.
“Thank you,” Byleth breathed, trying not to pay attention to the fact that her heart was threatening to jump out her chest. She wasn’t sure if it was because she was startled from falling, or if it was because Felix was comfortably princess carrying her.
He gently set her legs down so that she could stand up, and she used his shoulder for support. Once upright, she caught Felix staring at her with that strange, fond expression again. She expected him to make a snarky comment about how terrible that dismount was, but he seemed to be enraptured. Byleth spotted a faint cloud of smoke rise from the village in the distance, leaving no time to think about it further. She gasped and lurched forward, causing Felix to tear his eyes away from her to turn and spot it as well.
Soon, they were running, hands resting on the handle of their weapons as if nothing had happened. Byleth could feel the rage building up inside of her. Wasn’t stealing enough? Why would they destroy homes like that? From her peripheral, she saw the sword of the creator glow, as if responding to her anger.
Some of the thieves had been loading goods into a cart just at the entrance to the village. They were too busy to even notice Byleth and Felix descend on them, and the fight was over before it began. Clutching the sword, she made her way into the village, Felix trailing after her and watching her flank. “Can you see the Knights of Serios behind us yet?”
“I can see them in the distance. It’ll be a few minutes before they get here.”
They heard a shout down an alleyway and they both fell silent, moving to press up against the wall at the alley’s entrance. Byleth peered around the corner and saw a man clutching a bag of his belongings, trembling in front of a thief.
Another yell erupted from inside a home across the road. Before she could say anything, Felix gave her a nod and rushed toward the house, leaving her to deal with the alleyway. She was more than capable, but situations that called for splitting up always filled her with dread.
Pushing that out of mind, she slid into the alley quietly, gripping her sword with so much force that her knuckles were turning white. The thief was using an axe to threaten the villager, demanding the location of more valuables. The villager sobbed that this was all he had.
Byleth readied herself at a distance and snapped the sword of the creator toward the thief just as he wound up to strike down with his axe. The axe fell to the ground with a loud clatter, and the thief screamed out as the sword lashed his arm, nearly rendering it useless. The villager hurried out of the alley, still clutching his bag, and tearfully thanked Byleth before disappearing.
The thief writhed in pain before looking at Byleth with sweltering rage. She felt her stomach drop when he picked up the axe with his other arm and charged. The width of the alley meant that she couldn’t effectively use the sword as a whip, so she stood her ground. Just as she was about to cut through him in retaliation, she felt another presence behind her. Whoever it was, they were swinging something at her head. She managed to duck out of the way of the new threat and leapt out of the way of the charging thief. She quickly scanned her surroundings.
She was right about one thing. Someone was indeed behind her. What she couldn’t have known was that the scream had alerted a dozen thieves to the area. A lump rose in her throat as she steadied herself and assessed her situation. She wasn’t foolish enough to take on that many enemies at once.
Calm down and take stock, she desperately thought to herself as she backed up into the alley. Looks like... 4 with swords, 6 with axes, and 2 archers. At this point, the archers are the biggest threat. The axe and swordsmen hadn’t tried to target her yet, possibly threatened by the state of their other thief friend. However, just as she thought, the archers were taking aim. She managed to roll out of the way for one, then barely blocked the subsequent one with her sword. She took that moment to run to the other end of the alley.
Byleth soon felt an arrow whip past her face, sending a chill up her spine. How much longer until back up arrives? And what about Felix? Is he safe? She came to a screeching halt when another group of thieves appeared at the end she was running toward. Just how many were there?
Quickly calculating the best escape route, she ruthlessly charged at the new group, giving them barely any time to even draw their weapons. She blew two away with minor white magic before turning and slashing at the rest. Arrows continued to fly toward her, disrupting her from landing a proper blow. She clenched her jaw in frustration.
She knew it was a big risk but decided that it was one she had to take. She’d have to take out the bigger group at once with a spell if she wanted to escape. However, her more powerful spells took a moment to cast, causing that one moment to become a giant opening for the enemy. Although the thieves in front of her were mostly subdued, she could hear footsteps heading her direction from the street ahead. She swore under her breath, knowing she wouldn’t be able to handle any more enemies.
Byleth turned to the group pursuing her in the alley, took a deep breath, and took aim.
A flash of blinding, burning light descended on the group, causing the stone road to shatter and crumble around them. She was successfully able to hit them all at once.
Suddenly, an arrow flew out from behind the light and struck her side, knocking a startled breath out of her. She wasn’t quick enough; The archer had fired before the spell hit. She saw the blood before she even registered the pain. The arrow had ripped straight through her.
Clutching her side as a desperate attempt to stop the bleeding, she turned to the remaining enemies behind her. Thankfully, they either fled or were knocked unconscious, but she remembered that she’d heard more people heading this way.
Byleth was nothing if not determined. She held out the sword in front of her with one hand, pretending not to notice the visible shudder rolling through her body and up to her fingertips. The pain was beginning to bloom, and she felt like she was being ripped apart. She could either hold out and fight or use up the remainder of her energy to close her wound, but both options began to look far-fetched. The footsteps rounded the corner and she drew in a sharp breath, expecting the worst.
She nearly collapsed with relief when she realized it was Felix and Sylvain.
The next few moments were a blur. All she could really do was helplessly watch as she tumbled into them. The knights frantically surrounded her, trying to figure out what to do. She overheard one of the knights telling Sylvain that the healers weren’t there yet. She let out a dry laugh and shut her eyes as she was lowered to the ground and propped up against a wall, silently cursing at herself for missing the chance to close the wound herself even though it was unlikely to have worked.
Byleth’s thoughts were still racing, albeit with greater difficulty than before. She was gravely injured in a simple fight with a gang of thieves. As another wave of burning pain rolled through, she became frustrated at the fact that she hadn’t taken more precautions. Winning the war didn’t mean she was invincible in these smaller battles.
A warm hand suddenly, but gently, cupped the side of her face, urging her to open her eyes. “Felix?” She murmured, surprised at how close his face was when she opened them. A haze had formed in her mind and she was finding it difficult to focus on him, but she knew she had to try. She noticed that a small gash ran down the side of his forehead, still slightly bleeding. “You’re hurt.”
Felix looked exasperated and she couldn’t help but smile softly at that ever so familiar expression. He squeezed her hand. When did he grab her hand? “I’m hurt?” He sputtered incredulously. “Do you even know what state you’re in?”
Before she could answer, a group of healers descended on her. She let out a pained gasp when their flurried hands were placed over her wound. Desperate to show a little dignity as the new leader, she bit back her cries. The wound slowly closed, sparking a flourish of pain with every shift. It gradually faded into more of a pulsing stab, and everyone around her seemed to let out a collective breath. Although the coast wasn’t completely clear yet, she knew she’d be safe until she got to Manuela.
“It’s not like I haven’t been wounded before,” she pointed out weakly, still staring at the gash on Felix’s face. “I’ve survived worse.”
Felix seemed to bite a comment back before meeting her eyes. Byleth was pretty sure that once she got better, she’d get lectured by him about being smarter in battle. But, for now, the crushed expression on his face left her heartbroken, and she desperately wanted to console him. She piped up again to try and lighten the mood. “Looks like I fell out of practice with real battles, huh?”
He let out a shaky breath before sitting down next to her, still clutching her hand. It was a while before he spoke again. “I suppose I have too,” he gingerly wiped some blood off his face. “It only took us a month to slack off.”
“I think,” she slowly muttered, wishing that the fog in her mind would clear. She rested her head on Felix’s shoulder and felt him relax. “We’re just better as a pair.”
Felix took a long time to respond to her again and the gentle movement of his breathing lulled her tired eyes to close, so she barely heard him when he murmured, “we are.”