Work Text:
The first time people started asking questions were during their first separation. It was bad, like most break up were.
Seungyoun was a mess back then. And he believed —based on what Wooseok’s brother and closest friend told him then— Wooseok wasn’t any better.
Thinking back to the catalyst of their separation, Seungyoun could only chuckle over how trivial it was. A mere understanding. They were too young that time (third year of college), too many things to juggle at the same time, with insecurities eating up their soul and never-ending assignments booked up a majority of their time. Such a fragile time in their relationship, that a minor rumor about Wooseok getting closer to his ex again could shake their entire harmony, not that it was there to begin with.
Seungyoun still remembered it crystal clear. How red Wooseok’s face was, probably from holding all the anger, but still refused to raise his voice. Seungyoun, always the emotional one, has been screaming accusations around while trying to wipe his tears. Listening was the last thing in their list that night. Every word were said purposely to hurt the other. An effective venom.
Wooseok was the first one to say ‘we should break up’. Seungyoun said yes in a beat.
That night, they left their dorm with a shattered heart. Spending summer holiday with drying tears.
It’s not until the fourth week of the holiday, when Seungyoun found out that it was all a misunderstanding. A big one, on his part. Kogi (Wooseok’s ex in the conversation) told him what really happened when they met during a moot court practice.
(No matter how heart broken you were, moot court practice knew no tolerance.)
That night, he drove 140 kilometers to Daejeon. Heart aching, pride in shames.
But most importantly, in fear of losing one best part of his life.
That night, they both cried in front of the fence. One month of not being present in each other life put a hole in their soul. It also made them realize how hard it was to function without the other. Something possible to do, but something they would rather not do.
News about their separation apparently spreading wide during the summer. Thus, when they were hand in hand again in the beginning of the semester, they had people asking questions.
“I thought you broke up?”
“Yeah, it was a mistake though,” Seungyoun remembered saying, but couldn’t able to remember who’s asking.
“Yeah? Well, I thought it was for good. I mean, both of you are so different. It’s amazing that you make it this long.”
“Oh that’s where you are wrong,” Seungyoun cut him off spiteful. It was one thing to have people on his business, but to judge about his relationship in front of him was a whole different hell. And Seungyoun were ready to bring one for that said person.
“I don’t know what makes you think you have the right to judge my relationship, but you should know that you are wrong. Dead wrong. This one I have with Wooseok will last a lifetime. A have nothing to prove to a stranger like you, but know that what I say now is the only reality you should accept. One day, you will look back to this day and think how stupid you are for saying that. Fortunately, I will not be there, because this will be the last time we talk.”
Seungyoun walked out without looking back. One thing he learned that day was that people could talk and they could not know better. They did not know Wooseok. They did not how his smile can bright up Seungyoun’s awful day in a second. They were oh so wrong.
The second time came with a third and a sudden influx of ‘I wonder how you could last this long’ in tens variations.
Wooseok fulfilled his dream to become an Environmental Lawyer. While Seungyoun was busy being an associate in Finance and Project practice group in a corporate law firm.
When they learned this fact, people’s initial reaction would be furrowing their brows. Accompanied by question as how could they be together. Then came the conflict of interest talk, of how Seungyoun could probably be partaking on establishing a mining project of which the company ended up polluting the environment, and Wooseok would probably be on the other side, handling class action against said company.
A scenario that had a big opportunity to happen, but fortunately not. Yet. At least.
But, what do they know about Wooseok and Seungyoun. Their perception might be as skewed as what environmental lawyers do (Wooseok mostly dealt with advisory on how to establish a green business. Litigation was a small portion of his job). What they did not know was how Seungyoun could find Wooseok curling up in their living room sofa at 2 a.m., but still opened his eyes when he heard his footsteps in their tiny apartment.
“Of course I could identify you from your footsteps, Youn. It’s not like we’ve only been together for one month,” was what Wooseok say.
Seungyoun could only hope his boyfriend wasn’t a light sleeper. He knew Wooseok needed all those sleeps. He also knew that what they have went beyond getting up on a midnight just to give a hug after the other get back to home, only to close their eyes again the next minute. It was so much more than that.
But Seungyoun also knew Wooseok existed in little details. And he loved every little part of it.
Thinking back about what he had heard of people about them gave Seungyoun a slight headache. And a sudden realization of how miserable his life would be without Wooseok.
That’s why that morning, when Seungyoun was busy staring at Wooseok’s back whose busy making a toast and scramble eggs for their breakfast, he suddenly blurted out the question.
“Let’s get married.” Seungyoun was already behind Wooseok when he said it, leaning to their kitchen island. Wooseok, probably thought he misheard Seungyoun, could only rolled his eyes.
“Come on, don’t joke around.” Wooseok gave a plate of toast and scramble egg. Seungyoun sighed, though he still received the plate, placing it in their dining table.
“I’m not joking, Seok.”
“Yeah yeah, I know. Sit or we will be late.” Wooseok was already starting with his breakfast, when he heard a slight cracking sound. He found Seungyoun opening the higher cabinet in their kitchen, rummaging on to something behind the place where they stacked their ramen. He pulled out a small black box with a silver engraved on top of it. Seungyoun then walked to where Wooseok were sitting, bended his one knee. A small box was opened with a pair of silver rings inside it.
Wooseok choked on his toast.
“What are you doing?” The words came bustling, when Wooseok heard how strained it was. He drank his water, waiting for Seungyoun to response. Seungyoun only began to speak when Wooseok has placed his glass back on to the table.
“Kim Wooseok, I know this is out of the blue. And it could have been more romantic than this —but I swear I have planned a more decent one! Just, it would be on Christmas and I don’t think I can wait any longer for this. I love you. I really do and I guess you know it. Marry my, please?”
Wooseok was dead silent. He looked Seungyoun in the eyes for more than a minute. Cold sweat began to flow in the back of Seungyoun’s neck. Fuck. He really fuck this up.
“What brought this?”
“I-..” Seungyoun took a deep breath before he continued,
“Remember when people used to question us? Why we were even together? How come we last this long? I think they were wrong. I think, we are destined for each other.”
“So you ask me to marry you to prove other people how wrong they were?”
“No.”
“So why? Why now?”
“Because I think of how my life would be without you and I can’t stand the thought.”
“But I’m here, Youn. I’m not going anywhere.”
“I know. And what different would it make if I shot the question on Christmas? I just couldn’t bear the thought of living without you.”
By then, Seungyoun eyes started to water. Always the emotional one in their relationship, indeed.
Wooseok chuckled. The love of Seungyoun’s life chuckled when he proposed to him.
“You’re such a moron,” he said, taking one ring from the box and gave it to Seungyoun. “Yes, I will marry you, Cho Seungyoun. Now, wipe those tears and put the ring on my finger.”
Seungyoun sometimes to think he could be wrong, too. That in the far future, they might not be together. But it was something he shouldn’t prove to other people. For what he and Wooseok have were their and their only.