Work Text:
Darion was swiftly striding down the sleeping quarters hallway of the Acherus, dodging stray ghouls as he went. He really wished his death knights wouldn’t leave their minions to wonder freely when they returned. He’d complained about it during a meeting once. But many of his death knights stated that it was unnerving to have a ghoul groaning and shambling around in their quarters while they were trying to rest.
He paused for a second when he noticed the skeletal form of Lurid, Thassarian’s minion, slowly shuffling down the hallway. Lurid was a slightly unusual minion. Most death knights preferred ghouls, raising them from fresh kills. Instead Thassarian had animated his minion from a pile of old bones, creating a skeletal construct.
Darion looked up and down the corridor hoping to spot the skeletons master. It was unusual for Thassarian to leave his minion alone, making him one of the few responsible owners in Darion’s eyes. But Thassarian wasn’t anywhere in sight. Sighing to himself, he gestured for Lurid to follow and started to head for Thassarian’s sleeping cell, listening to the skeleton mumble and clatter as it walked.
Darion opened the door quickly and stepped inside, motioning out of the door with a sweep of his arm at the minion which had paused outside. “I found you skeleton wondering the halls.” And then he had to stop talking and stare as his brain caught up with what his eyes were seeing.
Lying upon his back on the bed was Thassarian. He was naked. And sitting astride him was one of Darion’s elven death knights Koltira Deathweaver. Who was also naked. Both had frozen and were staring back at Darion with wide eyes.
They were busy. Obviously.
Darion produced a strangled noise out of his nose and swung around quickly, shutting the door with a bang and staring at where Lurid was standing off to the side. The skeleton construct was slowly shaking his skull and producing a low continuous distressed moaning sound.
Right.
***
“Are you incapable of locking a damn door?”
“These doors have locks?”
“…”
“…”
“No. They don’t. Dammit.”
***
The reconstruction of Hearthglen was coming along nicely. The main keep was finished, just needing to be furnished, and a number of other building were almost complete. The Inn had been the first building to be completed, as the workers didn’t want to stay in tents longer than they needed to and relished having properly cooked meals rather than the ones made on outdoor cooking fires.
Out of the many rooms within the inn, one had been set aside for any visiting Death Knights, as a number had been helping with the construction of the Argent Crusades new headquarters. This was mainly as a punishment duty from Darion, but the Argent Crusade didn’t need to know that. They were just happy for the help and co-operation from their Ebon Blade allies.
Darion was currently visiting to speak to Highlord Tirion Fordring, who had taken the opportunity to give Darion a tour of the almost completed site.
Coming up to the as yet unnamed Inn, Darion mentioned that he would like to retrieve an item that he had left in the room for a previous visit.
“Of course,” Tirion motioned towards the door and lead the way inside. “Do you have the key currently?”
“No, it’s been a little while since I stayed. Acherus is not so far away that we really need to spend the night here.”
Tirion unlocked a box from a shelf near the door, sorting through the boxes contents before finally pulling out a key. “Hmmm. Well, the main key to the room seems to be missing, but the spare is still here.”
“I’ll have a talk with my death knights, make sure they know to return the keys straight away.”
Tirion smiled, handing the key over and lead the way upstairs, “I’m sure they’ll return it before too long. As it is, we have a number of spare keys, here and in Mardenholde Keep.”
Opening the lock, Darion pushed open the door, only to stop short as a yelp was issued from within the room, groaning under his breath at the sight before him.
On the bed, mercifully covered with the blanket, were Thassarian and Koltira. Both of whom were blushing hard and seemed to be trying to hide under the blanket as much as possible.
Not here. They couldn’t be doing this here! In the Acherus was one thing, but here! Where people other than their fellow death knights could catch them?
Oh Light, Tirion was right behind him!
Said Highlord leaned over Darion’s shoulder to see why he had stopped, and taking in the two death knights before them, pulled Darion back out of the room.
“Carry on!” Tirion called, chuckling softly as he closed and locked the door again. “At least we know where the main key is.”
Darion nodded mutely, mortified, before feeling compelled to explain his death knights behaviour. Although how could you explain it as anything other than what it actually was? “I’m really sorry about those two. I don’t know what’s gotten into them. And here of all places!”
Laughing Tirion directed Darion back out of the Inn to resume the tour. “I’d call it healthy. And a good sign Darion. Your men are trying to live their lives again. This is normal.”
“But here!”
“The room is for your death knights. They probably though it would be private. They did lock the door, after all.” They had stopped before the new church.
At those words, Darion looked down and mumbled “This time they did.”
Tirion looked over, catching the words and busted out with a roar of laugher.
***
Waving Thalanor to carry on without him, Darion hurried into the Acherus’s quartermasters office to grab the inventory checklist, only to stop short in his tracks.
Bent face down over the table was Thassarian, arms reaching out and hands grasping the edge of the table while his upper body was being pressed down by Koltira, who was leaning over him, hands on Thassarian’s shoulders.
Both Thassarian and Koltira had stopped what they were doing, staring guiltily at Darion, and holding as still as possible, as if they honestly believed that by not moving he would not notice them.
All the items which normally occupied the table had been relocated haphazardly to the floor.
“Oh for Lights sake!” Refusing to look at the two death knights, Darion walked quickly over to the table, grabbing the list he needed from where it had fallen onto the floor.
Leaving as quickly as possible, Darion couldn’t help but ask over his shoulder “What is wrong with using your sleeping quarters?”
But he shut the door before he could be given an answer.
Shaking his head at the audacity of those two, Darion set off after Thalanor to start the inventory check.
***
Darion stops his walk down one of the lesser used corridors on the Acherus, as his ears pick up an out of place noise. Curiously he pauses, trying to place what he is hearing.
Slowly he starts to walk again in an attempt to locate the source of the noise. With a feeling of dread starting to pool in his stomach, Darion notes that as the sound gets closer and clearer that it is a rhythmic grunting sound.
Really, he should just turn around. He doesn’t need to be here. There were reports that needed reading and signing off on. Communications needed to be sent. He was only taking a walk to try to clear his head. If what was going on down this corridor was what he thought it was, then it wouldn’t help with the head clearing in any way.
As if in a dream, Darion kept walking quietly towards the source of the sounds, resigned to what he was about to see.
And yes, there it was.
Thassarian was holding Koltira up against the hallway wall, his trousers gathered around his ankles and his hips moving against Koltira, head bent and face pressed into the elf’s neck.
Koltira was suspended completely off the ground, with on leg hooked over Thassarian’s elbow and the other wrapped tightly around his lovers waist. His arms were clinging around Thassarian’s neck, helping the human maintain his hold on Koltira, and his head thrown back, resting against the wall. The resulting position had the elf folded almost in half between the human and the wall.
That doesn’t look very comfortable at all, Darion couldn’t help but think, feeling completely detached from the moment as he stood there staring at the two coupling death knights.
With a start Darion realises Koltira is suddenly staring straight at him over Thassarian’s shoulder, his eyes hooded from pleasure. Instead of stopping or acting ashamed at being caught in such a position by his commanding officer, Koltira seemed to be challenging Darion to say or do something.
After staring at each other for what felt like long minutes to Darion but was realistically only a few seconds, Koltira tipped his head back with a moan as a particularly strong thrust from Thassarian, closing his eyes and releasing Darion from the staring contest.
Spell broken, Darion realised that standing there gaping at the spectacle was a terrible idea, and he should either break the two death knights up, or leave as quickly and quietly as possible. Mind made up, Darion retreated back the way he came.
He really needed to talk them about this. Within rooms was one thing, but in the hallway were anyone could come across them? This was definitely getting out of hand.
***
Darion was talking to Dariness, a high elf with a passion for studying the past, when he spotted Thassarian leaving the common room of The Legerdemain Lounge. Darion really needed to talk to Thassarian and assign him his new orders for going onto the Skybreaker, the Alliance gunship which would be patrolling in Icecrown, before he himself could set off to join Tirion at the Argent Vanguard.
Quickly excusing himself from Dariness, Darion hurried up the stairs he had seen Thassarian climb, stroking the orange cat as he passed and emerging into the upstairs room which contained the doors to the bedrooms of the inn. Testing the door to the room he and Thassarian were sharing whilst in Dalaran, Darion found it locked.
Well, maybe Thassarian had decided to go to sleep, and knowing that Darion had his own key to the room, had locked the door to keep drunken people from stumbling in. It had happened before after all.
With this thought, Darion produced his own key, unlocked the door and walked in. To his immediate horror and shock.
Mouth open at the unexpectedness of the scene in front of him, Darion’s brain supplied him with one thought.
“You’re supposed to be in Dragonblight!”
Sitting on the edge of Thassarian’s bed was Koltira, naked from the waist down. And in front of him on his knees was Thassarian, who had abruptly straightened up in surprise when Darion had spoken, revealing Koltira’s groin to Darion’s view.
Quickly turning away from the sight, for there were some things Darion really didn’t want to see or know about his death knights, Darion spluttered for a second before remembering what he had come in here to talk about.
“Oh for... Just come find me when you’re done. I have new assignments for you. Both of you, actually.”
He left the room and slammed the door shut more forcefully then he meant. And quickly locked it again before resting his head against the cool wood of the door in despair.
With a deep sigh and straightening his back, Darion went back towards the common room, trying to banish the image of just what Koltira and Thassarian had been doing from his mind.
***
Darion was about to open his office door when a loud moan was emitted from the room. He paused, hand still on the handle, before quickly letting go.
“No.”
Who said he doesn’t learn. Although really, his office? They had plenty of places to spend intimate time together in privacy. Darion was definitely starting to think they were doing it on purpose.
He leant against the wall, reading through the documents in his hands, half listening to the sounds coming through his office door. Eventually they stopped. And a little while after that, his office door creaked open slightly.
Koltira’s head peaked out, looking one way down the corridor and then the other, noticing Darion. The elf didn’t react to his presence other than a sudden grin spreading across his face, before emerging completely from the room and striding confidently away.
Soon after, Thassarian stepped out of the room as well. He spotted Darion, paused, and after giving him a solemn nod, walked off in the other direction to the one Koltira had taken.
Darion sighed and entered his office. His nose wrinkled and he opened the window as far as it was possible before looking around in dread.
Not on his desk surely?
***
“I send them to different sides of the continent and they still manage to fuck everywhere I need to be!” wailed Darion feeling frustrated and put upon. “They are doing it on purpose! I’m not sure what I did to them to warrant this treatment, but I’m being punished for something.”
“If nothing else, by separating them you seem to have increased the frequency and urgency of their couplings when they do get together.’ Amal’thazad calmly stated from where he was creating a miniature village made out of ice on the floor.
Darion clutched his hands to his head and started to pace, carefully avoiding the thick sections of ice that were spreading across the ground around the Lich and two of the stationary coldwraith constructs that were lurking by the walls.
“Maybe if you started to assign them tasks together, they wouldn’t feel the need to ‘catch up’ as it were, so frequently”. The lich suggested quietly, attempting to make a tiny ice tree.
Darion wasn’t sure when he had started to come to Amal’thazard to rant about his problems, but the cold air that surrounded the lich always calmed him slightly and it was especially pleasant in the hot weather the Plaguelands was currently experiencing.
“I can do that. At the rate they’re going, I might as well. They always seem to find reasons to be together anyway.”
With that decided Darion finally felt a little calmer. Carefully stepping over the growing ice sculpture, he set off to his office. If he found an assignment for those two, and if it just happened to be a long way from him, then maybe he could finally walk around comfortably and get some work done.