Chapter Text
Taeyong feels restless throughout the whole practice.
He felt that way since they landed in LA. At first, he blamed it on the long flight and being jetlagged. The short swim called him down a bit, after they finished with choosing the rooms. Nonetheless, he couldn’t quite pinpoint the reason for his unease as they drove towards the studio. The members were seemingly in high spirits, chatting cheerfully about the city and food, all the usual topics that will be put together later for their SuperM videos.
Their showcase is due in three days but Taeyong isn’t worried about that. They practiced hard, over and over again, almost for half a year gearing for this debut.
And yet there is an anxious tug in his stomach as they discuss the choreography for “I can’t stand the rain”.
Taeyong takes a quick look around the room, eyes stumbling over Ten who is currently talking with Taemin. Ten is smiling, flicking his eyes ever so often down and away, still somehow shy around his sunbaes, even after weeks spent in the practice rooms. Taeyong feels a sudden wave of irritation sweeping over him. He barely restrains himself from walking over to yank Ten away from Taemin. He shakes his head trying to clear his mind and goes to the other side of the room to get himself some water. The members don’t seem to think that something is off, by now used to his bouts of quietness.
All the same, Taeyong quietly grows more and more agitated as the practice session continues. The clock on the wall is nearing midnight. His stare now is glued to Ten tracking his every movement, every interaction with other members. Taeyong feels his self-control wearing thin. Jealousy, hot and ugly, rears its head and Taeyong can’t help the pure anger that floods him to the brim. At Taemin, who smiles all too sweet at Ten, at Lucas who gets too handsy. And even at Mark, who stands too close to Ten for Taeyong’s liking, which has never happened before.
He feels anger rising to a dangerous point. Taeyong doesn’t notice the low growl that comes from his throat until Mark doesn’t call him out.
“Hyung? Hyung!”
Taeyong snaps out from his haze, tearing his gaze from Lucas’s hand on Ten’s shoulder. He is met with a frowning face of the younger. The members turn to them when they hear Mark’s raised voice.
“Is everything okay here? What is going on?” Baekhyun glances from Mark to Taeyong, his eyebrows rising up in an inquiry.
Taeyong can’t utter a single word, trying to focus on his breath. He doesn’t hear what Mark is saying to Baekhyun. All of a sudden Taeyong feels suffocated. Everything is too much. It’s too hot and too loud. There is a ringing in his ears, a burning itch under his skin.
“Hyung?”
He comes back to a soft voice. He looks up to find a pair of familiar doe eyes. Ten is crouching in front of him, worry written all over his face. Taeyong takes a breath and opens his mouth to say something, anything, but is hit with a sweet smell he knows intimately. He licks his suddenly dry lips and tries to articulate a single coherent thought. But all his thoughts are full of Ten, with his heated sweaty skin and alluring sweetened scent.
Ten exhales shakily, trying to steady his pulse, that abruptly starts beating at a frantic pace. Looking at Taeyong’s darkening eyes and panting mouth he comes to a quick realization, almost at the same time as Jongin who breathes out a quiet “oh” behind them.
“What is going on?” Now it’s Lucas who asks the same question as Baekhyun before, glancing in confusion between the members.
“Taeyong is just going into a rut.” Jongin’s answer is measured and calm, like he’s citing weather. He shrugs his shoulders and smiles slightly, amused.
Ten hears Mark swearing somewhere behind them and Baekhyun stepping aside to talk to their manager and tries not to panic. He doesn’t know what to do in a moment and it must be showing.
“Ten,” he turns to Taemin, when he picks up on his apprehensive tone, “Step away from Taeyong.”
He turns back to Taeyong whose huge eyes are still on him. There is so much hunger in them, but underneath there is a poorly concealed fear. Ten doesn’t think Taeyong is aware of it yet. He makes a move to stand up but halts when he catches a wounded whine Taeyong tries to swallow. For a second Ten is torn, he struggles to make a rational decision. But in the end, he goes with his heart. He kneels in front of Taeyong, pressing his forehead to his, and tries very hard not to think about the consequences.
“Ten?” Taemin asks, bewildered at the display. “Are you two together?”
At first, Ten considers lying but then he sees genuine worry on the hyungs’ faces and knows it’s no use. Plus, they still need to try and work out a strategy to adjust the schedule accordingly. He simply nods and sits down beside Taeyong, intertwining their fingers resolutely.
The members keep their distance while they wait. Taeyong calms down considerably but doesn’t lift his head. Ten knows that he tries to calculate the damage. He doesn’t hold himself in an iron grip anymore but the leader’s habits die hard. The guilt for stalling the group is apparent to anyone and Ten’s heart aches for him. Taeyong keeps their physical contact to a bare minimum, just the touch of their hands as if not to aggravate the current situation further.
‧ ◦ • ♡ • ◦ ‧
Their ride back is quiet though the guys try to keep the mood light. They arrive at the condo where some of the management and a doctor are already waiting for them. Ten squeezes Taeyong’s hand briefly before letting go. Taeyong’s face is impassive as he goes into his room to consult first with a doctor and then with their manager.
In the meantime, the members gather in the living room to wait patiently for an outcome.
Ten bites his lips nervously, pacing by the doors of the patio, eyes shifting restlessly between the clock on the wall and a hallway.
“It’s okay, honestly,” Jongin reassures the others.
Ten looks at the older members and tries to subside his anxiety. They do look quite calm for the situation.
“Yeah, it happens. More than half of our members were caught in a cycle at least once during promotions. It’s no big deal.” Baekhyun shrugs his shoulders and smiles kindly. He pats the space beside him on the couch and Ten has no choice but to sit down.
“Why didn’t you tell us though? It’s not forbidden to have a mate. You didn’t have to hide it. It would have saved us a lot of misunderstandings,” Taemin asks curiously.
They all know the pair’s gentle affectionate nature, so the mere fact that they managed to stay apart is astonishing.
“We are not... We weren’t hiding it, just too used to keeping it low-key,” Ten says quietly. His mind flashes to Taeyong’s jealous eyes and impassive face.
“It’s not even low-key, it’s like you two are not even together,” Jongin says, his eyebrows raised in a perplexed manner.
“It’s not like that,” Mark protests when Ten says nothing to that. He is clearly privy to their relationship and doesn’t want others to get the wrong impression.
They are interrupted by the door to Taeyong’s room opening. The doctor steps out followed by the manager holding cameras from Taeyong’s rooms. They briefly talk to the management before informing the members that the schedule will proceed without major changes. After the discussion about the adjustments, the staff clears out leaving the members alone to rest.
The minute the door closes behind them Ten stands to check on Taeyong but stops when he sees the man in question coming into the living room. He looks exhausted but collected and, in some way, settled.
“Coffee?” Baekhyun claps his hands and ushers everyone into the kitchen.
‧ ◦ • ♡ • ◦ ‧
“How are you feeling?” Jongin asks once they all take a seat.
“Fine, I guess. It still hasn’t fully hit,” Taeyong says. He ruffles his hair as he gathers his thoughts. “I’m sorry for the inconvenience. It shouldn’t have happened in the first place.”
“Taeyong, you have nothing to apologize for. I believe, you are on meds?” Jongin asks. His nonchalant demeanour as an older alpha in a group calms Taeyong’s guilt a bit.
“Yeah, the blockers failed. The doctor says it shouldn’t be as strong as the usual one, cause it’s the first outbreak in four years, so I should be back to normal at the latest tomorrow evening. At worst, I’ll skip just the first stage rehearsal.”
The news seem to settle the youngest as the problem turns out not that serious. Mark and Lucas look relived upon hearing it. However, it does nothing to ease Ten’s nerves. He keeps fiddling with his own fingers, eyes worried when he glances at Taeyong as he talks.
“Wait, wait... Did you just say in four years?” Taemin interrupts.
“Yeah, since the debut,” Taeyong answers, confused as to why Taemin looks so scandalized.
“No, no, no. Taeyong-ah, you are supposed to take a break every six months from the blockers. Didn’t they tell you? Don’t tell me you are all taking them without a break.”
“It depends on the schedule, honestly. And is only allowed for the members that are of age,” Taeyong tiredly says as he isn’t up for an argument right now.
He heard about it, but it never bothered him because there were no side effects at the time. Up until now. Mark and Lucas quickly assure that it wasn’t even a year, and Ten says with a crooked smile that his schedule wasn’t as packed.
“So how long then have you two been together?” Baekhyun asks, who was quiet up until now. His gaze is sharp and calculating as if he’s seeking confirmation to the answer that he already knows.
“Two years.”
“That means-”
“Yeah.” Taeyong doesn’t want to be rude and interrupt the older like that, but he doesn’t want it voiced either. At least not now, not in this state.
“Huh,” Jongin says at the same time as Mark tries to stifle his sigh.
“I can stay with Mark for tonight,” Lucas says cautiously in an attempt to provide what little privacy the pair can get, since the first room is the furthest.
Taeyong throws Ten a fleeting look, but Ten keeps his eyes downcast. Nothing in his face shows that he even heard them.
“I don’t think that it will be needed,” Taeyong answers steadfast, trying very hard not to feel hurt. He puts his emotions aside, that bubble too close to the surface, dead set on staying professional about the whole situation.
The atmosphere in the kitchen turns awkward once again.
“Okay, it’s been a long day and we all can use some sleep. Off you go,” Baekhyun shoos everyone out of the kitchen. He looks pointedly at Jongin as everyone says their goodnight. Then grabs Ten by the arm before he can sneak out, “A couple of words.”