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Before Steve went in the ice and woke up in the 21st century, he was convinced that he didn't have a soul mate. He never had a song stuck in his head, never found himself humming a song for no reason. He got used to the idea. Not everyone had a soul mate - Bucky didn't. And when he arrived in the future he learned that it is even rarer now to be born with a soul mate.
But then, once he was defrosted by Nick Fury and ended up in the 21st century, he found himself singing and humming more often. He refused to believe that the music stuck in his head were songs sung by his soul mate. Steve doesn't have a soul mate.
The first time he considered having a soul mate was because of Bucky. They were on a mission, chasing a man who was suspected of working with Hydra.
They were waiting in the car, and across the road, the man they were working with was sitting in a bar. Steve began to mumble the lyrics to a song he didn't even know.
"I know you since middle school," he began, "and I've never heard you sing."
Steve shrugged.
"I think I heard it on the radio."
But Bucky didn't believe him. And Steve didn't really believe himself either.
The second time Bucky heard Steve sing, it was in the morning while they were drinking coffee together. Not much has happened lately. The superhero life was unusually quiet and that didn't predict anything good.
Steve began to play a song he didn't remember ever hearing. A normal thing considering he has lost seventy years of music. Bucky looked at him with a smirk.
"When you meet her, tell her I like her taste in music."
It took a little while for Steve to react. It was almost as if he was in a trance.
"I don't have a soul mate, you know that."
"What if you didn't have a soul mate back then? Maybe she wasn't even born. That's why you only hear her now."
Steve shrugged as if he didn't believe what Bucky was saying. But he had already considered the possibility, turned it on all sides and then threw it in the trash. He couldn't have a soul mate.
The problem was not that he didn't want a soul mate. Steve Rogers was a hopeless romantic, and the idea that there was a person in the world who was perfect for him and they were bound for life sounded too good to be true. Because it was. When he was a kid and still hoped to have a soul mate, Steve used to daydream all the time about the day they will meet. How it will be, what he'll tell her. This girl would not make fun of him for being short or mock the way he looked or his poor health. She was going to love him just as he was.
It hurt when he realized that girl doesn't exist. It took him a long time to get to terms with the idea that there was no one in the world who would find him perfect just the way he was and now that he did, he couldn't get his hopes up again.
But no matter how much Steve was in denial, the music didn't stop. Every morning, in the shower, for coffee; at night, at bedtime. Sometimes even during missions. If Steve had a soul mate, she loved music - and he loved her music.
Most of the time she'd sing love songs. She'd sing old music, jazz, slow rhythms. Most of the songs Steve had never heard before. He would try to google them and he managed to find some, but not all.
At that moment Steve was humming a love song on the way to the training room when he met Bucky. He would usually refrain from singing around him because he used to tease him.
But Steve being Steve, it didn't last long.
"Have you thought she is singing these songs for you?" he asked. "To help you find her?"
Of course, he thought about it. He felt a little selfish, but he felt that every word of love and the sweet song was for him. He was stupid. His soul mate - if he had one - didn't even know Steve existed.
But he didn't say anything to Bucky, because he felt that the music was personal. It was their song and theirs alone.
"Have you ever sang for her?"
"Why are you so invested in my love life?" Steve asked, sounding angrier than he had intended.
"First of all," said Bucky calmly. " You have no love life, to be clear. Because you're a coward. Second of all, you're selfish, Steve. There is a woman somewhere perfect for you. She's serenading you for God's sake! Not only do you condemn yourself to a life of loneliness, but also her. If she never finds you, it'll be your fault. Hundreds of people would give anything to be in your place, and you fuck it up."
Steve tensed up. He never thought that Bucky would want a soul mate. Nor that his soul mate would suffer as he suffered when she found out she was singing for no one.
"You're right. Maybe I should stop denying."
Two evenings later, they were both at a fundraiser hosted by Tony, dressed in fancy suits, drinking whiskey and chatting.
"I know this song," Bucky said. "You always play it."
Out of reflex, Steve looked at the singer on the stage. She was beautiful, dressed in a black velvet dress. Her voice… a single feeling came to Steve's mind as he tried to describe the woman's voice. Pastels gliding on paper. Soft, pleasant, mixed with the warm feeling Steve had when he was drawing. Absolutely beautiful.
It probably costed Tony a fortune to bring her.
"Yeah, I think it's her favorite song. She always sings it."
"I never heard the song anywhere else, now that I think about it."
The music stopped, the singer murmured some thanks, then excused herself to take a break. Bucky came up with an idea.
"Steve, the singer is pretty, isn't she?"
Steve nodded instantly as his eyes watched her descend from the stage.
Bucky rose from the table, quickly moving in the direction where the woman was talking to Tony and a man he didn't know. She seemed to feel slightly uncomfortable, her arms crossed at her chest. He tapped her lightly on the shoulder.
"James Barnes," he introduced himself. "My friends call me Bucky."
Tony gave him an angry look for interrupting him, but the woman seemed so relieved. She smiled at him.
"I know who you are. (Y/N)."
They shook hands.
"My friend thinks you are very talented. Do you wanna come meet him? He's too shy to come talk to you himself."
He nodded toward where Steve was. The woman's gaze fell on him, a subtle smile forming on her face. She looked at him up and down, then turned to Bucky.
"Lead the way."
Steve then noticed them coming towards him and panicked. The woman smiled in the corner of her mouth and Steve's heart almost exploded.
Damn it.
She sat down at the table, Steve kissed her hand when she introduced herself.
"So, what's the name of the last song you played?" said Bucky. "Steve really likes it. He wants to look it up."
The two looked at each other almost as if they were spellbound. Bucky wondered if he'd need to repeat himself to make himself heard.
"You won't find it online," said Y/N after a long silence, not breaking eye contact with Steve "It's my original piece."
Steve tensed up slowly, blinking as the realization settled in. It was her. The woman who has been singing to Steve every day since he got out of the ice. It had to be her. His face flushed red and the woman raised an eyebrow cockily.
She was enjoying making him all flustered.
"Uh, I'll get you something to drink," Bucky said, suddenly feeling like he was intruding in their moment.
It seemed as though they didn't notice Bucky left.
"So, (Y/N) started, I heard you like my voice."
Steve adjusted the sleeves of his shirt, avoiding eye contact, trying to buy himself some time. He nodded his head, afraid that his voice would betray just how nervous he was. Face to face with his soul mate – who was gorgeous, by the way – Steve realized just how much he's been longing for this moment.
It was nothing like he imagined as a kid.
In his daydreams, he was still scrawny, not at all like he looked now, but he was much more confident and charming. He would crack a joke to break the tension and flirt casually with the woman. But in reality, he was sitting there dumbfounded, unable to utter a word, in from of the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. And she was shamelessly flirting with him.
"Okay," (Y/N) put her hands on the table. "I sing every Friday at this bar at nine o'clock. You can swing by if you want to."
She slipped him a napkin on which an address was carelessly written.
"We can have a drink afterward and get to know each other better," she said.
At that moment Steve was glad he was sitting down. Because if he had been standing he would have fallen. (Y/N) leaned over the table, kissed him quickly on the cheek and returned to the stage.
Immediately after Bucky rushed to the table.
"How did it go?"
Steve brushed his hand against his cheek.
"I think we have a date."