Chapter Text
Usually on Sundays, I'm at my tiny apartment, eating bowls of cereal and watching sitcoms till ungodly hours of the night. Usually, I'd get home and lounge around feeling sorry for how I still can't afford decent meals even with my recent promotion. Usually I'd sprawl over my sheets and drift to a sleep that was as restless as it always ends up being.
Nothing about tonight was in my user guide of 'usual.'
A couple of weeks back, I was finally appreciated as a crucial member of the panel of managers at our company. Along with that scrape of a bonus and a pat on the back, came a string of meet and greets, dinners, balls and risible birthdays to organize and plan out on a weekly basis.
That also meant I had to encounter various kinds of people and work with them more regularly than I used to.
It was horrible, to say the least, to be nice to dozens of clans and audiences that were constantly worried about social classes and the hierarchy our laws bind to. It sucked even more to not be able to refuse to do their bidding and not be able to do anything as the less benevolent ones noticed the hints of omega in my scent and eyed the unmarked neck the little times I leave it exposed.
Even thinking about it makes me want to throw up. But that isn't a good decision considering I'm at a ball right now.
No wait.
I'm at the ball right now.
I've been forced to squeeze myself in this velvet midnight thing in exchange for the specific details I'd demanded from the wardrobe team at the last minute. I'd grilled them for sleeves that went up to my palms and the skirt to cover my feet. They had refused my request for a high neck without any real excuse but I had tightly clasped a black scarf around the expanse of my neck and shoulders with the excuse of the chilly night.
My boss didn't give two shits about it then and neither would he now considering how he simply disappeared the moment he saw the opportunity to gain more viable contacts.
In fact, since it's my first and hopefully last time attending this thing, everywhere I see there are people holding expensive drinks in even fancier clothes- most of them of the color black.
It was lavish. Too lavish.
I felt eyes turning towards me and others with every gust of the wind and I feel my omega senses folding in on themselves at the slight gazes of a number of alphas present. You would be surprised at the normalcy of people being claimed at fancy events like these. I've read stories of omegas being suddenly marked but as society teaches us in their affront and biased ways, these omegas always grew to be joyful because of how they felt being around alphas.
What a load of bullshit.
From an outsider's view this must be nothing but a big, stupid joke. It isn't until high school kids actually witness people taking days off when going through monthly heats.
Supposedly at the dire age of sixteen, one’s senses and scent both get heightened thus there’s more chance of omegas being chased by alphas who offer the former nothing less than slavery. Betas had it relatively easy with no extreme needs of dependence in existing. They were considered ‘too human’ and as would the conservative alpha eyes would pronounce, ‘nothing special.’
I’ve always thought I could use some of that humanness.
In my mid teenage years after working on careless jobs as library assistance and baristas, I had managed to secure enough money to buy these soaps and tablets that dulled my scent. Dulled it so it would highlight more of a beta-ness than I actually owned. Surviving without either would’ve been a nightmare and there were no exceptions I’d carried on that rule.
That is how I had survived till now. At the age of twenty four. And how I plan to survive for more if necessary.
I didn’t mention it, did I?
I’m half omega.
People consider this shit formal.
And yet this lame, boring, nothing-good-will-ever-come-out-of-it event has still been continuing for decades.
Shocking.
I honestly try to keep all my impatience locked in but it’s useless when every twenty seconds someone notices me standing alone in the corner and deem it mandatory to introduce themselves.
“I’m the assistant manager of the organization, yes.” I grip the scarf tighter around me, making sure to keep my voice slightly aloof.
Their replies too, are kind on the surface with the same text format. None of it stands out.
“I’m ____ __________. Nice to meet you.”
It is annoying being second in command when the pay isn’t great and it exhausts you to a certain length. It often feels like I’m scraping all my efforts directly into the trash without even thinking but there’s only so much you could do being an-
A sudden itch at the back of my neck pulls me out of my complaints. Although my heightened sense of consciousness was partly due to my unwillingness to attend this event, it keeps on increasing to the point that I keep searching the crowd for something.
A clear, deep voice cleaves through my train of thought,
“Good evening, I’m Kim Namjoon. From the clan of Seoul.”
My eyes snap up at the familiar name, my hand keeping a tight hold on my scarf.
Kim Namjoon.
The leader of one of the most influential and richest clans of the state. I distinctly remember my boss being proud of knocking them up for a celebration once. That is when the group was briefly discussed. They didn’t go by a name but they were...different as some would put it. The clan that was known to keep to themselves and whispered amongst the public as someone you can’t mess with.
Not that you shouldn’t but that you can’t.
That’s it. That’s all I know. I have a knack of wanting to doze off in meetings.
“I’m the assistant manager-”
“Ah yes I know. You’re the famous planner.” He pauses and smiles, “I believe it is your first time in the ball?”
“Yes. It is.” I succeed at smiling back.
“Well good luck. It gets too boring after some time.” His tone is easy and light.
I blink, “I thought I was the only one.”
He smiles again, this time displaying a pair of dimples “Trust me, I only come here because my beloved clan members enjoy the food.”
He gestures an open palm to a group of young men wearing dark suits. They stood at the dessert table, each with a plate ready, and were talking among themselves in easy grace. Their composure keeping away the prying eyes of the rest of the crowd.
"They're currently waiting for the chocolate fountain."
I raise my eyebrows, "There's none arranged."
"Oh I know. I hid the menu from them. I feel bad for lying, though."
I want to snort.
I think I just remembered something else from those meetings.
The Seoul clan is also known for their kindness.
“How many members does your clan have?” I ask. Small talk is exactly my forte.
“Seven, including me. And we loved your piece at Seoul’s annual exhibition. I wanted to personally thank you for that.”
A brief flashback to dark circles and caffeine-filled nights that had eventually lead to a day of sorting out flowers and an unexpectedly cheerful afternoon.
I brighten as another memory returns, “Oh yes! I do remember the exhibition.”
“Your flower arrangements and caterings were excellent. And considering how my beloved clan members deem the latter as most important, I couldn’t not express my gratitude to you.”
My eyebrows raise a little. I almost want to…laugh.
Instead I choose to reply with, “Thank you, Namjoon-ssi. That’s very kind of you.”
The man blinks happily at my simpleness, “You seem very easy to talk to.”
My mouth does quirk up, “So do you.”
He laughs, “Anyway, I must return to my family now. It was very nice meeting you.”
I nod at him, a little relieved as he takes his leave and a little heartened at how easily the words had flown between us considering I’d taken it to be as curt as possible.
It wasn’t always like this.
It probably wasn’t always that I avoided alphas like the plague.
But this is only how I still remember it as.
Midnight arrives.
I feel it everywhere.
I also feel something else.
Utter stupidity.
I should consider poetry, I think bitterly to myself. It’s late and my boss absolutely had to leave me in charge here after being called in for an emergency. The audience is in a lazy mood now but the exit gates still remain closed as per tradition, I think. Me trying to weasel out would draw too much attention and today had already been less than bearable.
I stand at the corner of the garden, careful of my dress or shoes to not make a single sound. Wary of every cold breath I take.
I’ll be okay.
I'll be off to the hotel any time now.
I eye the double set of doors for waiters to make quick rounds of and slowly edge towards it.
“What are you doing?”
I jump. My hand came to rest against my scarf again but I let out a relieved sigh upon seeing my colleague, “I’ve been asked to leave.”
It’s only a woman in her mid thirties with dyed hair and yet I halt at her pointed glare, “You can’t leave. It's about to be midnight.”
“...So?” A little impatience crawls in my voice.
“So? This is a customary ball and everyone must stay till it is regarded safe to leave! Didn’t you read the instructions?”
I sighed, “Jen, I have some personal affairs I need to urgently tend to. Will you please-”
“At this hour? You must understand” She bares her teeth in her attempt at a smile, “It’s against both etiquette and rules to leave at this crucial hour, you know how people here are…”
If it weren’t for the underlying desperation slowly settling in my bones, I would’ve rolled my eyes by now. Jen is quite the orator; even at this time of the night.
She was still talking, “...It’s our only event in Daegu anyway. I’d suggest you get comfortable. Why are you wearing the scarf? It’s a little hot here already-”
No-no what is she doing ?
I borderline smack her hand away before it completely unfurls the scarf wrapped around my neck and shoulders, not bothering to register her surprise and turning away. Panic drapes heavily on my features as I glance at the huge clock at the end of the garden, it’s close. I’m too much in danger. My beta senses are screaming at me to leave, to escape as my brain runs through every possible route to get the hell out of here.
This isn’t a ball. This is a death trap.
They don’t let you out at midnight because...because-
(because you know, Daegu is notorious for having events like these that contain surprises for unmarked omegas. Notorious to allow the humiliation of being marked so publicly as a little tradition.)
I shake my head, trying to get rid of those thoughts. Those won’t help me out. Goosebumps cover the expanse of my arm and my senses tingle with every feeling of the wind against my face, my hair, my skin- carrying my barely hidden scent far and wide.
The effects wouldn’t have worn off, right? I ate three tablets- they could last me eight hours for God’s sake…
I start to walk away from the crowd, one that has gotten silent ever since the pendulum struck midnight but that was fifteen minutes ago and nothing has happened yet.
But even in my depth of panic, I feel the tendrils of magic everywhere.
It spreads from an unknown source, its hold far reaching and I know something's off.
I need to leave. I need to leave.
My beta is crying out in frustration and a headache is settling in against all the worry. I dont massage it away, instead glancing past to the servant quarters again.
That is when I feel it.
I feel it before hearing the repeated gasps that go around, the hush that grows. I felt it before the silence becomes the loudest it's ever been. The itch of my skin subsides as realization settled deep in my bones.
A presence.
A presence so unfamiliar, so out-of-place right behind me. A scent I don't recognize that causes a tremor to run through me, to the tips of my cold fingertips. A tremor that hasn't shaken me up this bad since years and I try. I try to desperately turn around and beg the person not to. Try to step or run away. Try to do anything but there is magic that's making my vision hazy, loosening the tension in my bones as I smell the Alpha behind me.
Mating rituals are quite common in Daegu.
I hear one distinct voice, hesitant and weak.
"Jeongguk, wait-"
Then my scarf is torn away from my shoulders. Discarded to the ground carelessly. I cry out as teeth dig in the sensitive skin of the crook of my neck. Right where the mark is made. Right where an omega is most sensitive.
I wanted to kick him, cry out for help but the magic restrains me, my own body restrains me as my arms refuse to push him away. I could feel him wrap himself around me from the back. His fingers resting at the junction of my shoulder and the other around my waist, propping me up. The bite is deep with all the pain it's causing me and I can't help but let out a crushing whimper as he sucks on the bite, hard.
It was only when his mouth pulled away that I saw I'd somehow turned around and bitten him too, only mine was gentle. Vice less. I stumble forward as my body seems detached from my mind but a pair of arms are instantly around me. I vaguely register how he stiffens against me after a moment.
And I manage to utter one word before collapsing.
"Why?"
I woke up to numbness around my neck.
There are hazel rays of what must be street lamps that shone through the white curtains and the otherwise dark room. There was a smell of lavender in the air and the thrumming of an air-conditioner in the opposite wall.
Unfamiliar.
I tense and grit my teeth as it jostles my bandage slightly. My body, tucked beneath a heavy blanket, curls in itself. My stomach churns but I swallow, refusing to move close to the oak door that must lead to a bathroom.
My fingertips graze a thick bandage at the crook of my neck.
Claimed.
I shakily sit up, looking around for anything that might be familiar. There is only my black dress hanging on a closet next to another door. And my handbag with it.
My eyes widen and I glance down at the white shirt and pajamas I'm wearing, none that belonged to me.
I hear a creaking noise all of a sudden and whip around, cursing as the bandage pulls at my raw skin.
The door opens.
There is a man gaping at me. His eyes are round, enlarging as they land on my sitting figure. There's a mop of brown hair and a tall, slightly built body beneath the black shirt that hangs from his frame. His movement is firm as he enters but the look in his eyes is hesitant.
He stops mid-room and holds up his palms forward as he opens and closes his mouth, unsure of what to say.
I stare back at him. After all, what else could I do? Run away? Jump out the window? Scream 'you won't get away with this?'
We're practically bound.
I can't do anything about it.
"I'm Jeongguk." His voice is gentle, careful. His eyes don't waver from my face and I see his gaze soften as I pull my legs up under my chin, smoothly. Unafraid.
"y/n." I reply.
He lowers his hands, his lips forming the letters of my name as if he wanted to practice them out loud. He rubs the back of his neck.
"Um… sorry if the bite was too deep. I couldn't feel how hard I was clenching." His voice is sheepish, almost shy.
I look away so the bandage at my neck is hidden from his sight, "You mean you were conscious."
He frowns. Two thin lines ascending his forehead, "I wouldn't say that I wasn't. But I couldn't think straight. Namjoon hyung said my eyes were red too."
My eyes snap to his and I'm unable to keep the surprise from my voice, "This is Kim Namjoon's clan."
"Yes it is."
"And you marked me last night."
"It has been six hours but yes."
"You don't look apologetic about it."
He raises his eyebrows, "I understand you felt uncomfortable…" his tone is careful, almost as if he is unsure how to proceed.
Something in me snaps.
My gaze is unwavering, "Uncomfortable doesn't cover it. I feel violated."
Jeongguk murmurs, "I do too."
I blink, surprised.
"I couldn't-- I wasn't in control of myself. One second I was drinking water and the other you were limp in my arms and I had no idea who you were."
I don't reply.
"I… I know you don't believe me but please I didn't want to hurt you, honestly-"
"I believe you." I interrupt. Barely a second away from having an anxiety attack, "I couldn't move either. Didn't know I bit you."
"Magic got the both of us, didn't it?" His voice breaks a little and his shoulders droop further when my mouth downturns, "y/n, I'm sorry."
"Listen," I glance up, a tiny bit of resentment seeping in my voice, "Even if you've marked me I refuse to let you change anything about my life-"
"Woah, woah. Slow down." He stops me by taking a further step closer, making me tighten my arms around myself, "I'm not going to make you change your life. I mean, I get we're bonded and everything but that doesn't mean…"
"Yes it does, Jeongguk." His name rolls off of my tongue in a quiet manner, "I practically can't leave your place without you. At least not until some time."
Jeongguk remains thoughtful for a second before muttering more to himself than me, "It will wear off. The binding spell will wear off."
"It will." I'm so tired. Even thinking about this makes me feel exhausted, "But before then, I want you to know that I have a career and a home to tend to. I want you to know that I won't be staying here forever either for this… thing between us."
He doesn't answer. He doesn't meet my eyes.
"Who changed my clothes?" I ask awkwardly.
Please let it not be him. Please, please...
"After we bit each other, you passed out and the bitemark on your shoulder bled," He leans against the door frame, his displayed ease opposing a troubled scent in the air, "We took you to the nearest clinic who bandaged it and a nurse changed your clothes."
Relief sets in heavy and honey-like against my tounge.
For a minute, maybe longer, neither of us speak and there's only the feeling of the large room suffocating me without his voice.
"It healed." I whisper.
He looks up as my small voice reaches him and he notices me staring at the pink remnants of the bite I gave him.
I'm not having an anxiety attack.
"Yours still must be deep."
I'm torn. I shouldn't be at ease. Alphas are unpredictable and I don't know this man and I have no idea where I am.
"Where am I?"
Jeongguk is fidgeting, "You're at our clan's townhouse. The one in Daegu."
I messed up. I should have left that damned event. What would I do now? What would I be forced to succumb to, here-
"y/n."
My eyes snap to his and he swallows, "Can I… y'know. Heal that." He points to my neck.
"I already have a bandage." My voice seems closed off even to myself.
"No like," He inhales. His fists unclenched before he makes a vague gesture with his hand, "Alphas are…How do I put this… We're supposed to do this thing…"
He stays motionless and has his lips clamped together.
He seems nervous.
"We don't need to do it if you don't want to." He edges towards the door.
Unsure of what I'm doing, I unclasp my arms and pull the strands of my hair at the unwounded side of my neck. I wince as I try to pull the bandage off but it stubbornly sticks back.
"Here, let me."
He looks lost at my sudden actions but comes closer anyway and I keep my beta from shrinking away as he sits across from me. His fingers reach out and deftly peel one side of the bandage away, his fingers stroking the other side of my neck.
My breath hitches as he leans closer, his lips ghosting over my bare skin, near my ear. His hand slips to the small of my back before he rubs it, the motion causing me to relax a little.
"Okay?" He's closer now but there's nothing in his gaze or touch that makes me want to recoil.
I nod.
"Pulling away might hurt, ok? Just say the word and I'll stop." His eyes don't seem to waver from my own and his hand doesn't stop drawing circles at the back of my shoulders.
After noting the confirmation he needed, he didn't give me a second to react before his lips encase the bite again. This time, however, his teeth do not graze even the surface and only his tongue carefully licks away at the sensitive skin and I nearly jerk at the contact but his palms steady me.
I nod again as he looks at me for permission again before continuing.
At the near end, whatever numbness I had around my neck was gone and my ears rang from the sheer proximity of Jeongguk's face near my own.
He has huge eyes now that they stare back at me. Close. Too close but neither of us seems to pull away. His hair isn't brown, it is black. It stands at a stark difference to his light colored skin and the ends of his ears that have gotten redder as seconds have passed. He has a firm jaw but there is a softness to his cheeks and to his lips that has me curious.
"Better?" He whispers.
I nod, hesitating. Thankfully, he moves away after securing the bandage and I watch as he stands up to leave.
He bows then and his mouth quirks up as I look up at him, stunned.
"You should sleep. I'll…come by in the morning. Try to get some sleep, please." His voice is definitely a little desolate now.
"Goodnight, Jeongguk."
I don't meet his eyes as he says the words back and not as he hesitates at the door but gives up and leaves, closing the door behind him.
And it was maybe then that I buried myself beneath the pillows and let sobs out in a manner that the sound didn't even reach the four walls.