Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

As he exits Apgujeong Rodeo station, Jimin pulls his winter coat tightly around himself. He stares around his surroundings with slightly disdainful eyes.

Jimin isn't exactly the greatest fan of hanging out in Apgujeong. The people who frequent it are too posh, too stuffy.

Still, this is where his blind date, Taehyung suggested they meet, at a Korean-Mexican fusion joint. So Jimin's here, and he's nervous as all hell so he's here twenty minutes too early.

In his defense, the picture Hoseok shared of Taehyung on Kakao was nothing short of stunning.

The man has a ridiculously handsome face, with lots of floppy, dark hair, expressive, intense eyes and fine-boned cheeks. Jimin had taken one look at the picture, felt his pulse jump in excitement and texted Hoseok back a desperate, yes please hook us up, give me his handle.

Jimin's tried all the gay dating sites. He's been on J*ck'd and VGL, and while usage of them resulted in lots of fun, lots of satisfying hookups, Jimin's 26 and ready to try dating again.

He'd told his coworker and close friend and roommate, Jung Hoseok, who's on his Brand Development team at Shinhan.

Hoseok's entire face had lit up with excitement, eyes literally shining with it.

"Jiminnie," he squealed. "Been waiting for you to ask. There's a man your age who I know of. Very hot, owns his own atelier in Insadong. Kim Taehyung. Such a sweetheart and also looking to date."

"How do you know him?" Jimin had asked, curious.

"I took watercolor lessons with him," Hoseok explained. "We hang out once a month at a cafe with the rest of our book club. He told me if I knew any nice single men, that he was looking to give dating a go once more."

So Jimin had said yes, and found himself with Kim Taehyung's Kakao ID. That whole day, he was busy in the office, first on an important project that his Brand Development team manager had assigned as top priority. Then the team manager decided on an impromptu hwaesik that night.

So at 10 PM, drunk off his ass at a Korean BBQ joint, clothes smelling like barbecued meat, Jimin had been pleasantly surprised to see a Kakao notification from Taehyung.

It was very simple. Taehyung just asked if he was Hoseok's coworker and friend, to which Jimin said yes.

They exchanged a few small talk-y things. Jimin learned that Taehyung didn't drink much and while increased his trepidation a fair bit since Jimin enjoyed drinking a lot himself, it didn't really bother him. Okay, so the man didn't drink too much. Big deal. Jimin was learning not to be picky.

Jimin used to be really picky about the men he chose to date after his breakup with Taemin back in their teens. That breakup had been nothing short of devastating.

Taemin had been Jimin's everything. He was smart, witty, funny and good looking. Jimin had to fully cut ties off.

Just a year back, Jimin had finally fully gotten over checking Taemin's public Instagram page. He'd finally felt fully ready to move on and start a new chapter with another man.

Which brings him to where he is, at a CJ convenience store, loitering among the aisles.

He's too early. The cashier, a bored girl, gives him a couple of appreciative onceovers as he pays for a bottle of expensive Jeju spring water, absently tapping his T-money card against the scanner.

He brought out his nicest clothes today.

The yellow beret - Hoseok's suggestion. It's a flirty, cute nod at Taehyung's profession. Maybe Taehyung will appreciate it. Really appreciate it enough to want to rail him after this date. Jimin's wearing his slutty denim pants with an obvious pink zipper along his asscrack, that will reveal the string of the silk thong he is wearing if Taehyung is down to fuck.

He's even wearing a sheer black top that reveal his nipple and navel piercings. And on top of that, Jimin did his makeup really nicely today, plus he used the cream that makes his butt feel soft and smooth.

If Taehyung wants dessert, Jimin isn't opposed to letting him have it.

He checks his phone after taking a sip of water. Okay, he's got five minutes to walk to the restaurant and hopefully have what will be a fantastic date that will end in fantastic sex for the night.

"Let's get that dick," Jimin peptalks himself, nervous.

~

Foreigners run this place. The white staff who lead him in don't look fazed by his attire.

Taehyung's already there, and Jimin freezes, heart sinking in his chest.

Taehyung, he.

Taehyung isn't dressed up at all for their date.

Jimin feels his temper begin to rise. While he put in his best efforts to look nice for this man, Taehyung is dressed in a ratty hoodie and sweats.

And on top of that, Taehyung already got his drink and already started sipping on it, some pink-looking mocktail.

Jimin considers walking out of the restaurant for a couple of quick, angry seconds.

Then Jimin decides, oh fuck it. The man is dressed sloppy as fuck, but Jimin's thirsty ass gives him a pass. Taehyung is still way too handsome for his own good, managing to make the hoodie and sweats look work.

Alright, Jimin will ... make the most of this.

His mother didn't raise a quitter. And especially not a quitter when potential good dick is involved.

Taehyung looks up and gives him a warm smile. Jimin smiles back, already forgiving the man for the way he's dressed. That is a beautiful smile. 11/10 for that smile.

He stands up to hug Jimin and oh hell no, oh /fuck/ no.

Taehyung doesn't smell good. Jimin can get the smell of stale sweat and perfume from his hoodie.

Jimin, on the other hand, smells and looks amazing. He wants to cry.

"Hi," Taehyung says. "Did you have any trouble finding this place? It's been tricky when I've met other people here."

Jimin flinches. So this is a usual date spot for Taehyung. What!? Why would he say this to Jimin right away?

"Naver navigation works fine," Jimin says, a little too sweetly (poisonous.)

"That's good," Taehyung says, still smiling distractedly, oblivious to Jimin's thunderous internal mood.

Jimin takes his time shedding off his coat, in the chair adjacent to his own, and takes off his beret.

He grabs the menu, and discreetly looks up to see if Taehyung is checking him out at all.

He ... isn't. In fact, Taehyung's on his phone, looking distracted and his mouth is an upset comma inverted down.

The server comes to take Jimin's drink order. He waits to see if Taehyung will offer to buy his drink for him at least as an apology for being considerably less underdressed for their date.

Jimin ends up having to pay for his own drink himself.

One thing that Jimin hates is if a man isn't paying his 100% attention to him. It's /him./ Jimin deserves to be paid attention to. So he pointedly clears his throat, and plasters on a brave smile.

"How was your day?" Jimin asks softly, taking a sip of his cocktail.

Finally, Taehyung puts his cellphone away. "Okay," he says with a sigh.

Jimin waits for Taehyung to register the sheerness of his shirt. The way his piercings glint in the light. For any desire, any lust to take root in Taehyung's eyes.

It doesn't happen.

"Just a tiring day," Taehyung says. "My atelier was hectic in the morning, some parents were upset. And my ex ... Namjoon is a good man but he's dating again and he posted pics of him with his current boyfriend. I realized it still bothers me."

Goodbye to getting railed tonight.

Jimin spends the rest of their date talking to Taehyung as a friend, offering him pointers on how to move on from an ex and how to cope with work stress.

By the end of their date, Jimin isn't the least bit turned on but he can see that Taehyung is a potential good friend.

Still, Jimin is a bit upset.

It's not right that Taehyung didn't even try to look and smell nice for him. He excuses himself to the washroom, and sits on a toilet seat, tapping away a furious text message to Hoseok.

"date sucked. he showed up in a hoodie and sweats and didn't even smell that good. didn't offer to pay for my drink despite this. talked about his ex the whole time. okay sure, he's good looking but what on earth made you think he would match well with me???"

He tosses his phone back in his purse with a frustrated sigh, and touches up his makeup and lipstick. Oh well. He's just bummed out because he really was hoping for Taehyung and him to hit it off.

When he goes back to his table with Taehyung, the man looks frozen. He stares at Jimin, guilt writ large on his face.

"What's the matter?" Jimin asks, confused.

"I think you sent me a message you should have sent Hoseok-hyung," Taehyung says, very fast and breathless.

Jimin gasps. He unlocks his phone and checks his Kakao messages.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Sure enough, he accidentally typed and send the message to Taehyung.

Jimin lets out a mortified squeak.

His legs feel like jelly, and he collapses in his seat.

"-so sorry, I was just not in the right mind frame for this date, and you're absolutely right, I-"

Jimin barely registers any of it.

He takes a deep breath, feeling absolutely demoralized and humiliated.

Taehyung stops talking, looking visibly concerned and upset.

"Okay," Jimin says blankly. He nods to himself and then at Taehyung.

"This date was awful," Jimin says, his tone higher pitched than normal. "You just talked about your job and your ex, and you barely paid any attention to me. When I dressed up so nicely for you. You know what? You're getting the bill for both of us. I'm leaving."

He puts his coat on, and doesn't bother putting the beret back on. Instead, he tosses it at Taehyung.

"Hoseok-hyung thought you would appreciate me in a beret, being that you're an artist and all," Jimin says tonelessly. "You can have the fucking thing. Bye."

He leaves Taehyung in the restaurant and hails a taxi.

Taehyung holds the beret with both hands, and stares at it, absolutely devastated.

"Shit," he says to himself.

~

Yoongi tosses back another shot of soju. He wipes his mouth with the back of his mouth. For somebody who's put away three bottles of soju and is steadily draining his fourth bottle, Yoongi is still remarkably lucid.

"So I'm fighting with Seokjin and you had a disastrous blind date," Yoongi says, letting a drunk Jimin pour him another shot. It's the first thing either of them said in an hour. All they did was karaoke Eminem songs using Yoongi's karaoke machine and now they're taking a break.

"Your fight was so fucking stupid," Jimin says. He laughs, and his whole face is red from the soju.

Yoongi bristles. "I wanted salmon steak for dinner. He threw a shitfit because he wanted tilapia fillets instead. Fish is a serious topic for me and my boyfriend, okay?"

"That's actually so cute," Jimin says, mournful. "I want a boyfriend. I want to fight about what fish we're going to cook for dinner. Instead, I got tortured Insadong artist who's pining for his probably equally tortured artsy ex."

Yoongi gives Jimin a sympathetic pat on the back. "It is nice," he admits grudgingly. "Seokjin lets me be the little spoon a lot."

Jimin makes a sad little sound. "I don't even care about what spoon any man wants me to be as long as I can even be a spoon."

"I'm not really a spoon if you think about it," Yoongi says, contemplative. He takes a hit from his juul, exhaling the minty smoke in satisfaction. "I feel like I'm more of Seokjin-hyung's little fork. Grr."

He bares his teeth. Jimin slides him a deadpan look.

"You look as threatening as a Pomeranian," Jimin says. "So not at all."

Yoongi makes a frustrated sound. "Help me look really angry," he whines. "I'm trying to stay upset with hyung this time."

Jimin shakes his head and laughs. "I'm done," he says, grabbing his coat. "Hyung doesn't want us drinking too much so I'm cutting us both off. He'll be back from cooling down with Hoseok-hyung soon so you better stop."

Yoongi makes a face as his bottle is taken away from him. "I can finish it," he grumbles.

Jimin downs the rest of the bottle straight. He burps in satisfaction.

Yoongi laughs, flashing his gums. "Damn," he says. "You really wore the ass pants for tortured Insadong artist."

Jimin looks aggrieved. "He's really hot," he replies. "You would have worn them for him too."

Yoongi snorts, and shakes his head. "Seokjin's been trying to get my ass into tight leather pants for years now. He's only getting that for his thirtieth birthday."

"Why is he not deserving of it now?"

"I'm just a lazy bottom, leave me alone," Yoongi grumbles.

Jimin shakes his head sadly. "A lazy bottom and a little fork. Pick your struggle."

Yoongi makes an aegyo gesture at Jimin who mimes throwing up. "Seokjin's mad at me about his tilapia right now but he won't pick. I'm adorable just the way I am."

Jimin cuddles up to Yoongi and sighs.

"Tell me I won't be single by the end of this year," he says, desperately.

Yoongi hugs him tightly. "You know what," he says softly. "Hyung has a feeling you won't be, Jiminnie."

~

Hoseok throws his hands up in despair.

For one, Taehyung wouldn't stop crying.

"I'm such a failure," he had said over and over, two hours prior to passing out. "I can't get over Namjoon and Jungkook. What's wrong with me? Jungkook's younger than me. Is that it, hyung?"

Hoseok had been so torn between heartbreak for Taehyung and annoyance on Jimin's behalf. But it had been really hard to stay upset when he'd gotten a phone call from Taehyung crying so hard he hadn't been able to even get his words out.

"I doubt it's your age, darling," he said, as soothingly as possible. "Why are you still connected to Namjoon's social media, Taehyung?"

"I'm stupid," Taehyung said, eyes swollen from crying. "I know, I'm sorry. I should stop doing that. I wish he'd change his username and block me."

It had gone on like this, Taehyung eventually getting so drunk while berating himself he had to puke his guts out.

But Hoseok's sharp eyes catch the sight of Taehyung hugging a yellow beret in his troubled sleep now.

He grins.

The human heart and mind are both remarkable organs.

Taehyung is definitely ready to move on more than he thinks he is.

~

"I can explain," Hoseok says.

The whole day at work, Jimin has been shooting Hoseok singularly dirty looks.

"It better be a good explanation," Jimin says tartly, undoing the buttons of his dress shirt. They're on their way back home, walking to the subway near their office.

Hoseok sighs. They tap their T-money cards to enter main entrance of the Seoul Central station.

They have to take different lines because Hoseok is going to Yoongi and Seokjin's apartment so Jimin waits to hear Hoseok out.

"Okay so, Taehyung is very upset about how the date turned out," Hoseok begins.

Jimin immediately makes a face.

"Oh, he's upset," Jimin scoffs. "Because he's the one who clearly put all the effort into that date, hm?"

Hoseok drops his briefcase, in favour of resting both his palms on Jimin's shoulders. "You said you would hear me out. I have an explanation. Listen to me."

Jimin sighs. "If this is about his ex, Namjoon, then save it. That was not a good excuse to show up looking sloppy to our date, hyung. You know it."

"It's not an excuse, it's an explanation," Hoseok retorts. "So here's my suggestion. Taehyung has asked me to ask you something."

Jimin folds his arms and raises his brows, looking askance at Hoseok.

"Unblock him on Katalk," Hoseok says, in a beseeching tone. "And give him a second chance. Look, just trust me on this, alright. I didn't think, oh let me pair my friends up because they're both hot."

A side of Jimin's mouth begins to twitch. "Admit it," Jimin says, amused. "It was a little bit of that. You were thinking you connected two dots."

Hoseok makes an outraged squawking sound. "I would never! Listen, you're going to thank me for this in the future!"

Jimin rolls his eyes. "I get that he's your friend but it's okay if we didn't get along. It probably wasn't meant to be."

Hoseok gets a sad look in his eyes. "Park Jimin," he says quietly. "He had a bad day. He's desperate for a second chance. Please. He's a very good man."

Jimin exhales deeply, and pulls out his phone. He loads his KKT app and brings up Taehyung's chat. Jimin shows Hoseok the message he accidentally sent Taehyung.

Hoseok winces. "Ouch," he says tightly. "You're within your rights to have said that. But Taehyung's very sensitive."

Jimin rolls his eyes once more and makes an elaborate show of unblocking Taehyung.

"There," Jimin says, curtly. "I have unblocked your /sensitive/ friend both on KKT and my general phone messaging app. Tell him a phone call apology is what I expect."

They bid each other goodbye, and Hoseok grins as he gleefully messages Taehyung to let him know the deed has been done.

Jimin is all bark and no bite. So if he said he expects Taehyung to call him, that means Jimin actually isn't annoyed anymore, that little softy.

~

In Insadong, in his empty atelier, Taehyung stares at his now unblocked chat window with Jimin and heaves a huge sigh of relief.

He's wearing the yellow beret.

~

Winter is honestly a mess of an affair in Seoul. The government doesn't salt the roads and the subway steps are dangerously slippery. Still, Jimin enjoys egg bread and shawarma wraps in Myeongdong from stands with Yoongi and Seokjin who hold hands tightly and grouse a lot.

"It's not that bad," Jimin says, fondly exasperated.

"It is that bad," Yoongi grumbles, tucking his hand in Seokjin's arm, and burying his pink nose in Seokjin's soft pink velvet jacket. "Excuse me if I don't want to go skating from here to the Cathedral. I'm a gay demon."

"We can go flying together to our judgments," Seokjin replies, with a grin. "We partook in sodomy. We deserve to turn into salt!"

Jimin tunes them out. They're honestly like this all the time. It's both really annoying and cute.

They take the underpass back to the Myeongdong underground shops where you can buy cheap stuff.

Seokjin absolutely loses it over a great value deal of twenty snail face masks. He conveniently can't locate his wallet all of a sudden, and Yoongi gives him a very sour look.

"It's only 30,000 won," Seokjim wheedles, and gives his boyfriend his cutest pout.

Sighing, Yoongi cards the purchase.

"My sugar daddy," Seokjin crows out, in very loud English. Yoongi hits him upside the head.

Jimin walks a little further away, blushing in embarrassment for them. Gross. They're both almost in their thirties and acting like a bunch of silly teenagers.

He doesn't know them. Yes.

That's when he sees Taehyung, blind date Taehyung, bent over a display of purses a few shops away.

Jimin immediately ducks behind a display of cheap Kpop fans, trying to still the pounding of his heart.

It's been four days since their date, and Taehyung hasn't called him. Yet.

Well. He might have told Hoseok that he wanted a second chance just to look good in Hoseok's eyes and he could be intending to not call ever.

Jimin pouts at that, a little mutinous.

He peers through a stack of Kpop cellphone charms you can attach to your case. The ahjumma who owns the joint gives him a tired look and continues to crack open boiled hazelnuts with strong gnarly thumbs and pops them into her mouth. She gives no fucks about what he's doing.

Taehyung's not alone. Jimin can see he's with two other men. Both are really good-looking. One is tall with a lovely, dimpled smile and the other is just as tall with doe eyes and a cute smile. Their arms are linked together.

They're both talking to Taehyung.

Jimin can't hear what exactly they're saying, but Taehyung never makes eye contact with either of them. He replies, and he smiles, but he looks like he's trying to be happy when really, he's on the verge of a breakdown.

Jimin looks away, and catches up with his own friends.

He knows who those men are.

And for some reason, even though it's none of his damn business, Jimin's heart still aches with knowing compassion for Taehyung.

Jimin hates how he's always so readily empathetic. Hates it. People always take advantage of this part of his nature.

He glances down at his phone, and unlocks it to open up his chat window with Taehyung. His finger hovers over the call icon. He itches, he considers.

He stops himself and drops the phone back in his pocket.

It's Taehyung who needs to make the next step.

Jimin has to wait.

~

Jimin is the middle of drafting up a letter to his team manager at 11 PM, still stuck in the office building when Taehyung calls him. Staying back this late in the office, this is not a good habit, and he knows it. Even the most intense workaholic, Jung Hoseok, has left.

In his defense, Jimin feels depressed as hell, just having to deal with the loneliness of his room, even though he shares an apartment with Hoseok. The bed is too big, too cold and Jimin craves company, sweet intimacy. Craves a man holding him. Craves to hold a man. Craves a man.

The nights in the office get longer, the salad dinners get more frequent. Jimin wants bulgogi fried up with big chunks of garlic and onions on a sizzler plate. Wants his legs intimately tangled up with another man. Wants to have a boyfriend complain about his garlic-y breath.

Taemin did that. Used to do that. Look mildly disgusted at the sight of Jimin happy with his extra raw peeled garlic cloves in a bowl on the side when they went out to eat together.

"I'm not kissing you," he would say. "How can you eat garlic /raw/?"

He'd kiss Jimin anyway.

It's hard being lonely, and being cursed with the ability to feel and crave things all too keenly.

It's hard being alive.

Jimin is in an extremely depressive mood when his phone buzzes. He raises a brow at Taehyung's display picture of a hibiscus flower flashing on his screen.

"It's late," Jimin says shortly just after taking the call, reclining back in his chair.

"Sorry," Taehyung says, his voice raspy. Sounds like he's vaping. "Hoseok-hyung told me now would be a good time to reach you. He said, and I quote, "Tell that stubborn dongsaeng of mine to get back home already."

Jimin laughs tiredly, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I see."

Taehyung sighs on the other end of the line. "I'm high," he admits, and giggles.

Jimin laughs. He wonders how the hell Taehyung gets weed. "Are you too nervous to talk to me while sober?"

"Yeah," Taehyung says softly. "I mean. That was a shitty first date for you."

Jimin undoes the top two buttons of his dress shirt, and reclines lower in his chair. He bites his lip, feeling his body warm up.

Taehyung's voice is even raspier and deeper when he's high.

"It was," Jimin says, bluntly. "I was wondering if it's because you think I'm boring."

"No!" The retort comes fast and it's vehement. "You weren't boring. You aren't boring."

Jimin closes his eyes, his lips pursing into a childish pout. "You didn't even check me out. Are you sure it's because you don't see me as a boring bank employee?"

"Jimin, I should have postponed our date," Taehyung says softly. "It's just. I wasn't thinking much that entire day. Some parents yelled at me because they're not happy with the progress their kids are making at the atelier. And then, Namjoon, my ex. Well, I told you."

"Taehyung," Jimin says heavily. He takes a deep breath, and summons up his courage. "Taehyung, just come out with it. Do you find me attractive or not?"

Taehyung laughs, embarrassed. "... isn't it obvious?"

Jimin rolls his eyes. This man is equal parts endearing and exasperating. He's embarassed as fuck himself but plunders on.

"No, Taehyung. It's not obvious to me. And if you want me to keep having this conversation with you, that is a thing I want direct confirmation of."

Where Jimin gets the courage to be this blunt and direct, he has no idea. He often plays coy, hating to be this direct.

But they already started on the wrong footing from the start. He already made a fool of himself with the accidental text last week.

So what's the point in playing obliviously coy and flirty anyway? Jimin might as well lay all his cards on the table.

"Jimin," Taehyung rasps, exhaling loudly. "Who doesn't find you attractive?"

Jimin bites harder on his lower lip, and crosses his legs.

"I don't care about other people and what they think," Jimin breathes out. "Okay I do but right now, I care what you think, Taehyung."

"I'll tell you what I think but first, I want you to answer a question for me, Jimin," Taehyung replies, his voice rough and sultry.

His voice is so hot, and Jimin is a simple, horny human. He wonders if he can coax Taehyung into dirtytalking him through an orgasm.

But Taehyung's high, admitted he got high to summon the guts to call Jimin up and it's their first conversation since that date. Better to not get off with Taehyung so soon.

"What is it?" Jimin asks, curious.

"This cute yellow beret," Taehyung murmurs. "Was it Hoseok-hyung who got you the beret?"

Jimin flushes. "Yeah," he says cagily. "He helped me get ready. He got me the beret on his way home from work."

Taehyung laughs, and Jimin huffs in indignation even if the backs of his ears and cheeks turn pink.

"Is that so?" Taehyung asks, and his voice is gentle, so gentle that a lump of emotion forms in Jimin's throat, tears forming in his eyes.

"No," Jimin whispers, pressing his knuckles to his mouth right after. He takes a deep breath. "It was just his suggestion. I actually went out and bought the beret myself. I was so excited about our date I went out to Dongdaemun and spent a couple of hours trying to find one."

Taehyung is silent for a few seconds, and Jimin spends a herculean amount of effort trying not to obviously sniffle so Taehyung hears him lose even more composure on the other end of the line.

That was probably too much vulnerability. Too much neediness. Fuck. He's blown it.

Taehyung takes a deep breath, and when he speaks, his voice is wobbly.

"That's the sweetest thing a man has ever done for me," Taehyung says, his voice hoarse with emotion.

Jimin laughs, nervous. "I'm really sweet," he flirts shamelessly, his heart pounding in his chest.

"You are," Taehyung says. "And I don't think you're attractive. I think you're a beautiful person. Can I take you out on a second date, Park Jimin?"

It's embarrassing, downright embarrassing how Jimin's cock throbs at the praise.

Taehyung thinks he's beautiful. Fuck.

"You better make this one every bit as wonderful as I deserve," Jimin says, and it sounds way too needy and breathless to be an effective threat.

Clearly, Taehyung thinks so too because he chuckles.

"I promise," Taehyung says. Why does his voice sound so delightfully rough and sensual? God. "I'll make it really good for you, I promise."

Jimin lets out the needy whine he was keeping bottled up the minute Taehyung hangs up. He pulls his pants down and jerks off.

He comes, one hand down his boxers, the other harshly twisting his nipple piercing, thinking of Taehyung taking him apart with sweet endearments said in that deep voice with his expressive, lovely eyes trained on Jimin, and Jimin only.

~

It hadn't been easy seeing Namjoon again.

Namjoon had been a constant presence throughout his childhood. He was that older boy in the apartment next door whose mother was always making pots of jam for the whole building.

Taehyung still remembers being six, staring in wide-eyed awe at seven year old Namjoon, flashing his dimpled smile at Taehyung and holding a huge bowl of orange homemade jam with cling wrap covering the top of it.

"My Omma made jam," Namjoon said. He smiled kindly at Taehyung.

One look at that dimpled smile and Taehyung had fallen in love at first sight.

He would never grow out of it, stubbornly pining for Namjoon throughout his teens, building Namjoon up in his head till he was so far up his pedestal, Taehyung didn't think he'd ever attain Namjoon.

"I can't explain Namjoon-hyung," Taehyung says, frustrated, during a recent session with his therapist once. "He's...the one who got away."

"What do you mean?" She asks, patient.

"He's perfect," Taehyung says, tears pricking his eyes. "I'll never find another man like him."

"Why do you consider him to be a perfect man?"

Taehyung makes a small, explosive sound. "Even after our breakup! Fuck! He's so kind to me. He sends me such caring and thoughtful messages. Once he showed up with a huge tub of japchae and containers of banchan."

His therapist gives him a sharp look. "Have you considered the things he /did/ and not the person he /is/?"

Taehyung looks at her blankly, sniffling, dabbing at the corners of his eyes with a wrinkled-up tissue.

"If he loved you as much you wanted him to," she says gently. Very gently. "He would have held your hand tightly and never let go. He would have wanted to still stay by your side."

Taehyung stares at her, aghast.

"I'm," he says numbly. He closes his mouth. He opens his mouth again. "I've been writing stories about him in my head all this time, haven't I?"

She gives him a nod and a very sad yet knowing smile.

"Maybe it's time to stop mentally writing stories about you and him as a couple. Maybe it's time to accept your present, Taehyung-ssi."

That had been hard for Taehyung to hear.

But much needed.

So before he gathered up his nerves to contact Jimin again, Taehyung actually decided to be a grown adult and face facts. He'd gone out for jjimdak with Jungkook and Namjoon in a corner tucked away in Myeongdong.

And the whole time, Taehyung had been miserable.

It wasn't easy seeing his ex and his ex's current partner in such sweet domestic bliss. Jungkook fit with Namjoon so easily in ways Taehyung never had and it was both enlightening and embittering. From one hangout with them, Taehyung had understood his reality.

He was never getting Namjoon back. His chapter with his ex was truly over.

And Taehyung could either accept it and move on or continue to stay miserable.

So here he is, dressed up to the nines today in a pair of leather loafers, neatly pressed black slacks and an ironed black sweater. He did his makeup and dabbed his nicest floral cologne on both his wrists and neck. On his head, at a jaunty angle, sits the yellow beret.

Taehyung stares at himself in the mirror. He doesn't feel too good, if he's being honest with himself. He just feels like too little butter being spread out on too much toast. Stretched thin at all ends from stress and depression and fear of this Thing with Jimin going bust.

What's the point of even trying? What if it doesn't go anywhere, what a waste of time. Taehyung doesn't actually know if he believes in this working out.

He's working himself up and overthinking everything as usual.

But he looks at the beret and once again, the sight of it weirdly calms him down.

Jimin spent two hours in a crammed mall trying to find this damn thing to wear for him on a date.

The yellow beret is easily the cheapest thing Taehyung is wearing but also it is undeniably, the most precious.

~

"Hoseokie, who gives off more Home Alone 3 kid energy - me or Yoongi?"

Jimin pops his head out of his room, irritated. "Are any of you actually going to give me moral support for this date?"

The thing about Hoseok is that as a best friend and roommate and coworker, he is absolutely wonderful.

But he's also been crushing pathetically long on Yoongi and Seokjin who both show up at his and Jimin's apartment a little too often.

So while Hoseok has been pushing for Jimin to get out of his Taemin-induced funk and do something proactive about it like give dating a go again, he is a hypocrite who doesn't take his own advice.

"Jin-hyung, that's definitely you," Hoseok replies, hurriedly, getting up.

Yoongi looks outraged. "Seok-ah. Are you saying the weird Home Alone 1 kid then?"

Hoseok shoots him a pair of finger guns, with a blushy, grinning face and gently pulls Jimin out, who's honestly tired of all their weird flirting.

All three of their faces go somber at the sight of his date outfit.

Yoongi is the first one who breaks the silence, speaking very gently.

"Jimin-ah," he rumbles. "Where are your easy access pants?"

Taking a deep breath, Jimin shakes his head. "The zipper isn't working," he lies.

He knows how uncharacteristic this outfit is for him. He's dressed rather conservatively and masculine for their second date, in slacks, a dress shirt and no shimmery eye makeup, just foundation.

This isn't how Jimin likes to dress up for dates and they all know it.

"Where's that Etude eyeshadow palette you like, Jiminnie?" Hoseok asks, his voice all cute and babying. "Hyung can do your eyes for you!"

Jimin makes a face and shakes his head.

"No," he says, feeling oddly choked up. "I guess .... I'm feeling like presenting ... more masc ... today ..."

Seokjin heaves a sigh. Jimin said that so unconvincingly, they all know it simply isn't true.

They don't push it however, and watch Jimin leave, giving him supportive cheers and hoots and lats in the back.

When the door shuts, Seokjin turns to give Hoseok a Look.

"This man better be worth Jimin walking out dressed like that," he starts.

Hoseok shakes his head, a little gleam in his eyes.

"Let him try and experience things," he says softly. "He's been closing himself to possibilities since forever. Besides, Taehyung has a knack for making people comfortable."

Yoongi reaches out to squeeze Hoseok's hand. "You're really trying to do something good here," he says, blunt and soft. "That's what I love about you."

Hoseok goes and stays pink in the face as he lets Yoongi and Seokjin baby him for the rest of the evening.

~

Taehyung knows something is wrong the minute he sees Jimin waiting for him outside the entrance of the restaurant, and his heart sinks.

Jimin doesn't seem happy to see him. His eyes are blank even when he smiles at Taehyung.

"Hi," Taehyung says softly.

Jimin nods at him, and smiles wider. His smile still doesn't reach his eyes.

"Hi," he replies. His tone is cautious.

Taehyung takes a deep breath. Okay, he can do this.

"Let's go in," Taehyung says, as gently as he can, and infuses as much warmth and attentiveness in his facial expression as possible, holding open the door for Jimin to enter.

The ice in Jimin's facade melts some, and his cheeks flush.

He likes the little chivalrous gestures, and Taehyung knows that. He's had plenty of time to ruminate on their ruined first date, and he already figured that one out for himself beforehand. Jimin was definitely upset at him because he ordered his drink first that time.

It was plenty obvious by the way Jimin was waiting for him outside the entrance. He expects a date to wait to go in together.

On the other hand, Namjoon didn't give a fuck who came earlier, and he didn't care if Taehyung ordered something for himself ahead of his arrival.

But that was Namjoon, his childhood best friend, who slowly became his boyfriend. There were years of established familiarity and usage of banmal between them.

That was his mistake. He went into their first date, mentally treating Jimin like his ex-boyfriend.

As they get seated at their table in a corner by the window, Taehyung notices Jimin taking out his cellphone to turn it fully off and slipping it into the pocket of his winter coat before shrugging it off.

He winces, because Jimin made an obvious show of turning off his phone.

But the real blow is dealt when Taehyung sees the way Jimin is dressed.

That ... is not how Jimin dresses outside of work. Taehyung found Jimin's Instagram through Hoseok's and Jimin keeps his page public.

In fact, Jimin's dressed for this date as if he's dressed for work. His makeup is done in a very neutral way, just foundation. Not even the lightest touch up of blush.

His heart sinks further. Jimin really has come to this date with his guard fully up.

"I haven't tried Indian food before," Jimin confesses eventually, embarrassed, after blankly thumbing through the menu several times.

"Oh, really?" Taehyung asks, surprised. "Hoseok-hyung loves Indian food. We get it in Itaewon all the time."

Jimin shrugs. "I try to mostly cook for myself and hyung is always welcome to help himself if he wants," he says quietly.

"That's really nice of you," Taehyung says, as sincerely as he can. He means it. He's starting to realize that Jimin is a very generous person in general.

Jimin's cheeks flush some more, a pleased pink. Taehyung doesn't miss it, the almost viscerally obvious way Jimin responds to the praise, the way Jimin's body subconsciously leaned forward, almost as if aching for Taehyung's touch.

"Thanks," Jimin says, a little flustered.

He averts his gaze, and Taehyung grins.

"Do you have any objection to meat or seafood?" Taehyung asks. "I can suggest things for you to try!"

"Nothing really," Jimin says. "Maybe ... nevermind."

"No, what is it?" Taehyung probes. "It's okay, tell me?"

"Nothing with mushrooms please," Jimin says with a small laugh, setting his chin further into his ... all-the-way-buttoned-up-shirt-collar. Jimin is so covered up for this date it's almost funny.

"Mushrooms!?" Taehyung gasps, pretending to sound outraged, eyebrows rising high. "What do you have against mushrooms, Park Jimin!?"

Finally, Jimin relaxes into a burst of giggles, covering his face with his hand.

"They're weird!" He complains. "They have a weird texture!"

Taehyung stares at him, jaw agape.

"Weird texture!?" He exclaims, offended. "I love mushrooms. They taste so good."

Jimin gives him a disdainful look. "I hate them in my jjigae. Hate them."

"I'm sure you love something I would absolutely hate," Taehyung says.

Jimin simply smiles at that, but doesn't share.

That's fine. Jimin's shoulders don't look quite as stiff anymore.

Their server, a friendly South Asian man who speaks fluent Seoul-accented Korean, helps Jimin pick out butter chicken and beef nihari for them to share, buttered naan for Taehyung and garlic naan for him.

"Just a note," Jimin says hurriedly. "Lots of garlic on the naan, please."

Taehyung stops himself from smiling.

Looks like Jimin inadvertently shared.

They're informed that their dishes will take fifteen minutes at the least, so when their server fills their glasses with water, and moves away, giving them privacy, Taehyung finally takes the opportunity to lean forward.

"How are you doing, Jimin?" He asks.

Jimin opens his mouth to speak, and then stops. He plasters on a smile, and then says, "I'm doing fine. You?"

"I'm very tired," Taehyung says honestly. "I underestimated how hard it would be running my own business. I'm running back to back with art workshops all the time."

Jimin again starts to speak, and then blushes, shaking his head a little, as if what he thought was a stupid thing to say. He settles on saying, "That sounds very hectic."

Taehyung laughs. "Say what you really thought," he teases Jimin gently.

Jimin squirms, and his face turns pinker. Now that he has Taehyung's attention intensely focused on him this time around, he seems really flustered and nervous.

"I don't know why," Jimin admits, sounding sheepish. "But I never thought of art as work? Sorry, that's so silly."

Taehyung laughs, and leans closer. There's not much distance between them on the table, and Jimin looks like he doesn't know whether to move closer so they're intimately all up in each other's personal space or move away.

Taehyung holds his breath, waiting for Jimin to decide.

Jimin runs his hands through his hair, and laughs once more. Both are nervous tells for him, and Taehyung has discerned that.

Jimin smiles a tentative smile at Taehyung, and rests his elbows on the table. He leans in closer, resting his chin on his clasped fingers.

"I have to work really hard as an artist," Taehyung says, his voice confidentially flirty. "It doesn't come easy. I run workshops in my atelier from 8AM to 5PM. It's a really hard job because I'm constantly talking to adults or children. I also take many commissions."

"That's so cool," Jimin says, sincere. "It's nothing like what I do. I think people who do art for a living are amazing."

"Did you want to be an artist yourself?" Taehyung queries.

Jimin's gaze drops to his empty plate, giving Taehyung a chance to look at the empty holes in his earlobes.

Their first date, Jimin wore studs and these cute little silver hoops.

"No," Jimin says, and Taehyung's heart ache, because something in him can just tell it's a lie. He looks up and shrugs, his smile brilliant. "I'm afraid I'm not much of an artist myself."

"Tell me about your job," Taehyung coaxes.

"I'm in the brand development team for Shinhan along with Hoseok-hyung," Jimin says. He shrugs again. "It's not that interesting. Our job is to make the bank and its products look appealing. That's it really."

"I'm sure that's not just it," Taehyung retorts.
Jimin laughs. "Yeah, there's a lot of meetings and other stuff," Jimin says, nodding. "As a team, we have to constantly innovate and come up with new ideas."

"That sounds like art in a way too," Taehyung offers.

Jimin looks surprised by that. "I suppose it is."

They talk for a few more minutes, and it's. It's honestly really nice. Taehyung realizes when their food comes out that not for a single second prior to the food, that he was thinking about or comparing Jimin to Namjoon in anyway.

His mental energies were so focused on making Jimin feel safe and comfortable around him, that he totally forgot about everything else.

He knows Jimin thinks he's hot. Jimin literally acknowledged this in that mistakenly sent text.

But this time around, Taehyung's paying close attention, and he can't believe he wasn't doing that during their first date.

Jimin is all covered up today, and he's wearing the bare minimum of makeup, but he looks stunning.

And it's weird because Taehyung himself thought he hadn't paid enough attention then but he's noticing the disparities now. And then there's just Jimin himself with his pretty eyes and smiles, petite figure, chubby cheeks, and small hands.

He's so different from Namjoon.

And not in a bad way.

Not in a bad way at all.

They dig into their food. Jimin's evidently excited about his extra-garlicky naan even if he tries to play it cool. His facial expression morphs into pure pleasure when he has a bite of the beef.

"This is so good," Jimin says, with an actual moan.

Taehyung's cheeks heat up.

He hopes he's not being too obvious about his staring but then Jimin, who's really enjoying his food, starts to lick his fingers clean of nihari curry. Taehyung feels the first flame of arousal really hit as he watches, speechless, the pink of Jimin's tongue.

There's curry at the corners of Jimin's mouth, and now Taehyung is stuck staring at Jimin's messy mouth, at his lips, pink and plush and slick.

"You're very pretty," Taehyung says casually.

Jimin smiles at him, shy at first, and then slowly it builds in confidence.

"I know," he says.

"I'm glad you do," Taehyung replies. He takes a sip of his water. "It would make me sad if you didn't know how pretty you are."

And that, that, that's what flusters Jimin. He laughs nervously, and turns so pink, Taehyung's wondering if the man genuinely needs an ice pack to hold to his face.

So he asks, with a little smirk.

"You're blushing a lot," Taehyung teases. "Should I ask for an ice pack?"

Jimin pretends to toss his napkin at Taehyung which makes them both grin stupidly at each other.

"It's just the spice in the curry," Jimin quips back.

"Please. Hoseok-hyung said you love spicy food," Taehyung throws back. "That's why I brought you here."

"Oh yes?" Jimin asks. He takes a sip of his water, and smirks at Taehyung. "You asked Hoseok-hyung a lot about me, hm?"

He can't beat Taehyung at outrageous flirting. Taehyung leans in closer, lidding his eyes. "Of course, I did," he purrs. "I wanted to know all about you."

Jimin laughs again, and smiles as he mops up some beef with a piece of naan. There's a natural, innate delicacy and grace about him, even the way he eats.

Now that Taehyung's actively watching, he can't stop.

"You wore the beret," Jimin says quietly, as he spoons some butter chicken onto his plate.

Taehyung nods, and glances at the beret sitting on the window sill.

"I did," he says. "I really love the colour. I never wore a yellow beret before."

"Sorry, I just .... threw it at you," Jimin says, jerkily. He averts his gaze.

"I deserved it," Taehyung says. "But I hope I'm doing a better job this time."

"You are," Jimin affirms immediately, with a small smile. "I'm having a good time, and the food is great."

Taehyung didn't know how much he needed to hear that till Jimin says it. The relief that hits him is so instantaneous that it has him relaxing immediately.

"Good," Taehyung says, heaving a sigh of relief. "I haven't totally blown it with you, have I?"

Jimin wipes his fingers with the napkin. He sighs, toying with the hemmed edge of it.

"Be honest," Taehyung says. "Please," he implores.

Jimin lets out a frustrated little sound.

"You know," he says. "I usually find it hard to tell people what I really think about things."

"I see," Taehyung says. "I'm not like that."

Jimin snorts, and eyes him, still tugging nervously at the napkin.

"I'm not surprised," he says.

That makes Taehyung quirk an eyebrow at Jimin.

"What makes you say that?" He asks.

Jimin continues to study him, chewing on his bottom lip. "Were you always this handsome, Taehyung?" He asks in turn, faintly amused.

That makes Taehyung pause. "I was definitely always praised or noticed for my looks," he admits. "I had big ears but I grew into my looks really fast during my late teens."

"I had to work very, very hard to look the way I do right now," Jimin says. He takes a deep breath.

"And when that's the case, you find it hard to really open up about what you really need or want or think," Jimin continues, in a rush, like this is painfully hard for him to admit but he needs to also get it out. "You find it hard to take up space in a room. You have to fight."

Taehyung rests his cheek on his palm, touched that Jimin is sharing this much.

"I understand what you mean," he says. "I may not relate but I understand."

"So I think it's actually a good thing now that our first date went so badly," Jimin says. "Because I feel like there's no way I could embarass myself more so ... it helps me feel like I can just ... speak my mind."

"I don't know if you'll want to see me again," Taehyung says, a little blunt. "But I would want for you to be able to speak your mind no matter what."

Jimin looks up sharply at that, and he's clearly emotional. But then he masks it up, and sighs.

"You haven't blown it," he admits. "But I would like us to go for a couple of more dates. I don't know how I feel just yet. You ... you really upset me last time with your behaviour."

It hurts hearing that. But Jimin's upset is evident in the way he's dressed, done his makeup and worn no jewelry.

Taehyung does his best to keep a brave face on.

"I get it," he manages to say.

This is only their third interaction so far if the phone conversation can be counted. Already, the thought of having hurt Jimin is near unbearable.

"You're not the only one trying to move on from an ex," Jimin continues. "My ex is also a really sweet man and I'm hurting too."

"I didn't know that," Taehyung says, feeling bad.

"Yes, because I didn't bring that kind of negative energy about my ex to that date, Taehyung," Jimin says, his eyes filled with sad reproach. "I came truly excited about you."

Taehyung looks down at his left hand's fingers, oily from the naan, ashamed.

Then small, stubby, equally oily fingers sit atop his own, giving his hand a squeeze.

When he dares to look up, Jimin's smiling at him, tremulous and hopeful.

"Let's go on another date," he says.

Taehyung exhales heavily.

"Okay," he says.

~

That night, Taehyung deletes Namjoon's contact from his phone and blocks him on all social media.

Namjoon is a good man. But Taehyung needs to make a clean break of it.

No more ruminating on the what-ifs and the has-beens.

Time to work with what he's blessed with instead.

~

Later on, that same night, while a naked Jungkook snores peacefully, lying on his chest, Namjoon obsessively brings up Taehyung's Instagram profile.

It doesn't load.

Immediately, Namjoon checks the rest of his social media.

None of it loads.

Taehyung blocked him everywhere.

Namjoon heaves a sigh of relief, and sleeps without feeling shitty for once.

Fucking finally.

~

The awkward part of scheduling their next date is that Valentine's day is coming right up, and Jimin doesn't know whether to go big or go home.

"I would just do it," Yoongi mumbles, hunched over his laptop perched on one knee, a sleepy Hoseok's head on the other one.

Jimin whines, collapsed on the other couch in Yoongi's little studio. He's staring at his KKT conversation with Taehyung, lower lip stuck out into a frustrated pout.

"What if I'm coming on too strong?" He asks, in a panicky voice.

Hoseok rouses, burying his face in the soft material of Yoongi's sweats.

"Is hyung here yet?" He slurs, grouchy.

Seokjin is supposed to pick him and Yoongi up to take them back to Yoongi's apartment.

"Not yet," Yoongi says, and his voice gets all funny and tendersoft, the way it always does just for Hoseok.

When Hoseok is with Yoongi and Seokjin, it's remarkable, the way Jimin can see Hoseok becoming an absolute baby around them.

He gets whiney and grumpy, and even lets himself become a slob as Seokjin and Yoongi both fuss over and coo at him.

It's grossly cute, Jimin thinks. He's never seen a couple, or well, a throuple, if Hoseok can be honest with himself, be this besotted and sweet about each other.

"Jimin, you wore easy access pants that can be zipped along your asscrack to your first date with this man," Yoongi says, exasperated. "Anything you do after this is weak shit, and you know it."

Those fucking pants. Jimin lets his phone drop onto his chest. He sighs.

"I would have let Taehyung have some of this cake," Jimin complains. "But he doesn't like cake, I guess. You know how many squats I do in a day to keep my ass looking this cute?"

Hoseok levels Jimin with a tired look. "I wouldn't call it cute," he says.

"That's right because my ass is deadly," Jimin grumps. Honestly, he's still kind of offended that Taehyung didn't take one look at his ass in those pants on the first date, and want sex right after.

Those pants work. Everybody falls into Jimin's trap. Everybody except this infuriating(ly handsome) man.

"Wear them again," Yoongi suggests, with a gleam in his eyes. "He'll definitely be ... very receptive this time around."

That's true. They've been talking on KKT, and it's been getting flirtier and flirtier. Taehyung is shameless and says some really frank things.

Nothing sexual. They've silently, mutually agreed, it'll be best to take things slow on that front. But sue him, Jimin still wanted some praise and validation from Taehyung so he linked Taehyung his super-anonymous Soundcloud profile.

Taehyung had marked the chat blurb containing the Soundcloud link as "Seen" and then not responded to him for six hours. Anyway, Jimin had been busy with work, so he hadn't checked his phone much. Just once every ten minutes. Totally casual. Yes.

Then at around 9PM when Jimin had left work, and was in his apartment fixing dinner for him and Hoseok, Taehyung had responded.

"i can't stop thinking about you. your voice is sweet, like raw honey. i want to roll around naked in it."

Jimin wondered if he was truly pathetic, fingers jammed in his mouth, drooling around them as he'd frantically fucked himself on his dildo, thinking about Taehyung's praise over and over.

He pictured Taehyung saying it to him in his deep, raspy voice.

He pictured Taehyung naked, supple, golden skin smooth and soft to touch beneath Jimin's greedy, roving hands.

Their naked bodies pressed together, Jimin responding eagerly, stupidly eager to all of Taehyung's praise.

This yearning, this need to be close to Taehyung, it keeps mounting, and Jimin is helpless in the face of it. He's easy, and if Taehyung asks, and all Taehyung has to do is just ask honestly, Jimin would just let himself go, send nudes and beg to get fucked.

But he's trying to be kind to the side of him thats shy, and nervous and freaks out fast over sex he was too desperate to have and wasn't entirely sure he wanted.

So he doesn't escalate the flirting too much.

"I'm going to take him out on Valentine's day," Jimin says, in a resolute tone. "I said I'll plan the date this time around. So why not? I'll do it."

Yoongi says, "yay" very monotone but Jimin knows he's pleased with his decision.

"What are you gonna do?" Hoseok asks groggily.

"Take him strawberry picking in Ilsan," Jimin says with a smug smile. "His family owns a strawberry farm in Geochang. It'll be nice for him, right?"

Hoseok's eyes widen immediately, and he sits up, alarmed.

"No, don't take him to Ilsan," Hoseok says. "That's his ex's hometown."

Jimin looks dismayed. "Oh, are you serious," he exclaims. "I already booked a date for us to go! And it was supposed to be a surprise."

Yoongi furrows his brows. "I know there are some farms in Yangpyeong," he says, thoughtful. "You can take Taehyung there. And I think it'll be even cheaper for you."

"Yangpyeong is even further out than Ilsan," Jimin grumbles, stressed out now.

"So?" Hoseok retorts. "Make him a cute dosirak if you're already doing this much for a date. You can use the long commute to cuddle with him."

Jimin flashes Hoseok an impressed look. "Hyung, you're a genius," he says, already dialing the Ilsan farm to cancel his booking.

After he's done, Jimin stares at both Yoongi and Hoseok uncertainly.

"What?" They both ask in unison.

"Is this too much?" Jimin asks, feeling shitty and insecure again. Ugh. This is why he hates planning dates. His perfectionist self gets obsessed with making them unique.

He's not like Taehyung, be casual and impromptu about it, just organize a sitdown dinner date with no hassle.

Jimin likes to plan his dates to be as cheesy and cliched as possible. He's always been such an annoying romantic.

Yoongi looks like he saw this coming.

"Think about it like this," Yoongi says easily. "You would like for him to put more thought and effort into dates, right?"

Jimin nods.

"Then you got to gently model it for him," Yoongi says. "By taking the initiative, you're showing him what you want and also encouraging him."

He scratches the back of his nape, and buries his fingers in Hoseok's hair, petting and soothing. Hoseok falls asleep immediately.

Jimin still looks like he wants to backtrack the whole thing so Yoongi also adds, "At the very least, you get to make him feel good and special. Isn't that enough? Be brave, Jimin. You always are brave."

Jimin sniffles a little.

"You're right," he says wetly.

~

Jimin laughs when he looks up from his phone, only to find Taehyung walking towards him, the yellow beret perched atop his head yet again.

Taehyung grins as he does an appreciative onceover of Jimin's cute outfit of denim overalls, a white shirt underneath and his little satchel.

"You look very cute," Taehyung says, and raises a curious eyebrow at the red thermos bag Jimin is also carrying. "What's that? Where are we going? Are you going to tell me?"

Jimin laughs again, covering his mouth with the back of his loosely coiled fist. "So many questions."

Taehyung pouts, and gives him puppy eyes, and Jimin melts a little at how adorable he suddenly looks. Jimin had messaged him to dress cutely today, but Taehyung still looks very strikingly handsome in his baby-blue sweater and black jeans.

"Tell me," Taehyung wheedles.

"We're going to Yangpyeong," Jimin finally relents. "Strawberry picking, that's what we're doing. And this," Jimin unzips the bag to shyly show Taehyung the packed bentos he woke up early this morning to make. "I made us lunch to eat on the way."

"Oh," Taehyung says softly. He looks stunned. "You. Oh wow."

Jimin tucks his hair behind his ears with both hands. He's nervous, and wonders if he scared Taehyung away for good.

Maybe this really was too much.

"Maybe this was too much," Jimin says tightly, recoiling in on himself. "I'm. I'm sorry, I just, I-"

He's cut off when Taehyung suddenly envelops him in a very warm, very impulsive and very tight hug.

Jimin's eyes, wide at first, close in immediate comfort from the proximity. He exhales, going boneless and relaxed in Taehyung's arms.

"Happy Valentine's day," he says, giggling, taking a deep breath of Taehyung's scent. It's clean, green tea cologne and citrus-scented soap.

Taehyung groans, the sound of it extremely heartfelt. He jiggles Jimin a little, and hugs him tighter.

"Park Jimin," he says, his voice a soft, sweet rasp against Jimin's ear, making Jimin shiver in pleasant anticipation. "You're easily the sweetest man I've ever met."

"Oh?" Jimin asks, with a pleased smirk on his face, as he pulls away, heart pounding in his chest. He pushes the red thermos bag against Taehyung's chest. "Add bossy to your list of adjectives for me too. Let's go, Taehyung. We have to get on the subway."

He holds out his hand, and Taehyung stares at it for a few seconds before smiling softly and taking it, letting Jimin guide them forward.

~

Jimin is adorable in his overalls. So adorable all Taehyung can think of doing is pinning Jimin against a wall, and kissing that full mouth senseless.

That mouth, that gorgeous, soft mouth. Taehyung knows he's going to kiss Jimin by the end of today.

He can feel it.

"-called to make sure we can eat strawberries in the farm, and yes, we can eat as many as we want!"

Taehyung blinks.

"Sorry, what were you saying?"

Jimin makes a face at him. "Pay attention to what I'm saying," he scolds.

"Tell me again," Taehyung coaxes, squeezing Jimin's hand. It's smaller than his but Taehyung can feel the strength in them. The safe feeling that comes with holding Park Jimin's hand and being the current, singular recipient of all his attention and care.

Jimin sighs, pretending to sound put out when he is anything but, blatantly delighted to be Taehyung's focus.

"I called ahead and the farm confirmed we can eat as many strawberries we want as we're picking them," he says again.

Oh. Ohhh.

Taehyung is not interested in eating the strawberries though.

He'd much rather eat Jimin up, he's looking way too adorable for Taehyung's poor heart in these overalls with his sweater paws.

"Right," Taehyung drawls, making sure to lick his mouth a little obscenely. Sure enough, Jimin's gaze drops to his wet lips. "The strawberries. I want to eat the strawberries."

Jimin colours badly, and starts to say something. He stops.

Taehyung grins. He likes this. He can see the way Jimin is dying to cuddle up to him, and it's fun, teasing him gently. Anytime he gets bold, he can see the way Jimin's whole body angle towards him.

"What did you make?" Taehyung asks.

"Just basic dosirak for us really," Jimin waves it off, like it's nothing. "Oh, and gimbap too."

Taehyung is going to leave the planet. Goodbye to Earth, it was nice living here.

"What-what time did you wake up even to cook?" He asks, incredulous.

Jimin blushes. "Early," he says, in a non-committal way.

"How early is early?" Taehyung presses, not having any of it.

"... 5AM?"

Taehyung can't help it. He puts an arm around Jimin's shoulders and brings him closer.

Jimin finally drops his head onto Taehyung's shoulder to hide his flaming face in.

"I just wanted to take you on a really nice date," Jimin says, voice muffled because he's trying to make himself as small as possible against Taehyung.

Taehyung smiles. He puts his arm around Jimin, and sighs, feeling both tingly and content.

It's the best feeling ever.

"This is already really nice, and it's just started," he says, gently tracing the outline of Jimin's small, stubby fingers with his index finger.

Jimin makes a little noise, but he's smiling against Taehyung's neck.

They get many funny looks from people filing into the subway train, including heterosexual couples. Taehyung sends them all coldly, intimidating looks, glad that Jimin's not looking at anyone else, but cuddled up on his shoulder.

It still seems like Jimin is aware though.

It's weirdly hypocritical how society is. There's a bunch of teenage boys in school uniforms giving them dirty looks. Those same boys probably cuddle each other themselves and think nothing of it.

But Jimin and Taehyung are holding hands, wearing date outfits so it's not okay.

"We can sit separately if it's making you uncomfortable," Jimin suggests. He makes no move to get away from Taehyung.

Taehyung holds Jimin tighter. "I don't want you to move," he says.

"Okay," Jimin says. "If anyone tries to bother us, I have a black belt in taekwondo."

Taehyung laughs, but he also colours. Jimin's thighs aren't visible in these loose overalls but they certainly were visible, strong and thickly visible in those easy access pants he wore on the first date.

Those pants. Taehyung... hasn't forgotten about them.

He remembers the way they looked on Jimin, accentuating his tight, trim figure, and the fullness of his ass. Jimin had made a subtle show of turning around when he hung his winter coat on his chair and Taehyung remembers being stunned at the sight of the obvious pink lace zipper.

He'd been all up in his head, depressed and hung up on Namjoon to give Jimin a fair chance that day.

But now Taehyung is trying and he has so many questions.

Does Jimin prefer to top or bottom for anal? Does he like being kissed? Does he like giving or receiving oral sex more?

When Taehyung is alone at night, in his bed, jerking it, he usually jerks it to memories of the sex he had with Namjoon.

It was good sex. Really good sex. Part of the reason Taehyung knows he's still hung up on Namjoon.

Namjoon has a big dick, and he knew how to use it.

There were times when Taehyung would have to sit down very gingerly on a soft cushion he'd strategically kept on the leather chair he used in his atelier. Taehyung had a habit of demanding Namjoon give it to him rough during anal sex, and he didn't like much lube either.

But as his conversations with Jimin get steadily flirtier, his sex fantasies have become weirdly confusing.

He'll start off picturing that one time he fucked a naked, pliant Namjoon on their kitchen counter, and he'll finish off picturing Jimin instead.

Or he'll recall that one time he was needy, so needy, he sank down on Namjoon's cock, and aggressively rode his ex. But halfway through, Namjoon's face becomes Jimin's instead, sweet and pouty and intense, and Taehyung doesn't know what to make of it anymore.

"Do you like being touched?" Jimin asks, out of the blue. He laughs sheepishly. "Sorry, that's a strange question."

"Do you?" Taehyung counters back.

Jimin nods. "I do," he replies, looking flustered. "And I like to cling to people a lot too."

"I love to be touched," Taehyung says, with a smile. "And I love to cuddle. I can't sleep unless I hold something. When I was with my ex, I was mostly the big spoon."

Jimin nods, as if committing this information to memory. It's really cute.

Taehyung really wants to kiss him.

"I don't mind anything," Jimin says. "I used to be mostly little spoon with my ex, and that was fine with me. I like to cuddle people a lot."

Wouldn't mind having those thighs of yours wrapped around my waist from the back, Taehyung thinks.

Halfway through their long subway ride, Jimin suggests they finish their dosirak .

Taehyung coos at the neatly cut gimbap. Jimin made three rolls of them, with combinations of danmuji, kkaenip, kimchi, carrot, cucumber, egg strips, imitation crab meat and bulgogi.

"Sorry if there's not enough salt," Jimin apologizes. "I eat very healthy so I go light on the salt."

Taehyung pops a piece of gimbap in his mouth. Jimin is correct; it's not as salty as Taehyung likes.

But he's grateful for the effort Jimin put so he says, "It's delicious."

Jimin beams brilliantly at him in response. He gives Taehyung his dosirak, and Taehyung dies at the neat container containing compartments of warm bap, bulgogi, spinach, danmuji and kimchi.

"You didn't have to do all of this for me," Taehyung says, devastated.

Jimin blushes. "Please don't say that," he says quietly. "When I am interested in someone, I always want to take care of them and feed them. I like you, so I wanted to feed you."

Oh dear god. Taehyung's poor heart. He stares at the man, not knowing what to say.

"I'll-I'll eat well," he stammers, and blushes when Jimin holds out a gimbap piece for him with his chopsticks.

Taehyung bends his head and lets Jimin feed him.

The chopsticks and spoons Jimin brought are a cute hot-pink. Taehyung's heart is in overdrive.

Taehyung has never been treated like this before.

Like he's precious, and worth the effort.

There's love in Jimin's food even if there isn't salt. Taehyung eats everything diligently even if he's bursting after because Jimin honestly made Too Much Food.

He helps Jimin put the empty containers away, and Jimin cuddles up to him as usual. This time, he also hugs Taehyung's arm, and yawns.

Taehyung decides to take his chance to touch, using his free hand to ruffle Jimin's hair. Jimin responds well, hugging Taehyung's arm tighter.

"Why are you wearing that beret all the time?" Jimin asks, sleepy from the food.

"It's cute," Taehyung says defensively. "Also," He gathers his guts up to say it. Just say it, Taehyung.

"It makes me think of you."

Jimin looks up from his resting post of Taehyung's shoulder, and smiles.

"I threw it at your face before leaving," Jimin murmurs, amused.

"But you spent two hours at a crowded mall trying to find it for me," Taehyung retorts. "It's the cutest thing a man's ever done for me."

Jimin makes a mock-outraged sound. "Are you saying this lunch and date isn't the cutest thing ever?"

Taehyung sighs. "Everything you do is cute. I'm not about to start ranking it all."

That satisfies Jimin, and he presses up closer. Everytime Taehyung praises him, he clings.

"Did your ex not ... do these ... kinds of things for you?" Jimin asks delicately, after a while.

Taehyung sighs. "We dated in our late teens and a little into our early twenties," he says. "I think it's ... I don't know."

"We can talk about something else," Jimin offers.

"Actually, I want to talk about it," Taehyung says. "I'd like to tell you about this one incident that happened when we were younger."

Jimin gives his arm a squeeze. "I'm all ears," he says.

"So," Taehyung starts. "This was around a year before we officially broke up. I was 22, finishing up at my art program in Hongik. It was going well, but my relationship with Namjoon was not. We were on a break."

Jimin hums in understanding, and intertwines his fingers with Taehyung.

"There was this guy in my seminar class for Korean mythology," Taehyung continues. He takes a deep breath. "Namjoon and I had agreed that it was okay if we saw other guys during our break."

"But Namjoon and I were still messaging too. Not so much, just hi and bye. But then one day, this guy asked me out on a date. I was really thrilled, he seemed like a very cool person. I ... don't know why I thought it was a great idea but I shared that with Namjoon by text. The thing about Namjoon is that he would have periods of being somewhat attentive and not lost in his own depressive funks. And when I texted him that I was thinking of saying yes to this date, Namjoon immediately called me, sounding very sad. He wanted to try again, he said."

Taehyung takes another deep breath to steady himself.

"I...I was very emotionally affected by that conversation," he admits. "Namjoon immediately came over, and we had some wild makeup sex. I felt so special and wanted that day."

Jimin makes an understanding sound.

"You realize now, that it wasn't something to feel special over," Jimin says. "That he shouldn't have needed to hear you were considering another man to come to you and make up."

"Yes," Taehyung says, his voice tight. "I met up with him and his new boyfriend. See, I know Namjoon really well. So when I saw them together, it was both good and upsetting because I can tell he's being so much better to Jungkook. I can't lie to you, Jimin. That upsets me."

Jimin makes soothing sounds, moving to hug Taehyung around the waist.

"It's like, Jungkook gets the designer brand, and you got the cheap knockoff," Jimin says.

That makes Taehyung laugh his ass off.

Jimin grins, looking obviously pleased at having made Taehyung laugh.

"I understand," Jimin says, when they've both calmed down. "But you've grown up. So has he. He's giving a more mature version of himself to someone else. That sucks but also, it's okay. It's human nature."

"Yeah," Taehyung says. He sighs. "You're right. You're a genius," he adds in a playful tone, ruffling Jimin's hair.

Jimin whines, but then relaxes when Taehyung fixes his hair too.

"It took you long enough to realize that I'm a genius," he grumbles.

"But now I'm here," Taehyung says.

Jimin looks up with a soft, little smile, and once again, Taehyung thinks about closing the distance between them, what sorts of sweet, needy, wanton sounds Jimin will make for him if Taehyung kisses him.

"Now you're here," Jimin agrees.

~

The farm is surprisingly not that busy when they arrive. They're given little wooden baskets painted green, and Jimin swings their joined hands excitedly as he tugs forward an amused Taehyung into the greenhouse.

"This reminds me of my grandparents," Taehyung says quietly.

Jimin stills in the process of twisting a particularly large berry off from the runner.

"They own the farm, yes?"

Taehyung nods, with a pensive smile. "Yes," he says, and then hesitates before saying, "They're my parents. My actual parents passed away in an accident."

Jimin's face falls, and Taehyung shakes his head immediately. "No, that happened when I was a teenager," he said. "I was twelve. Namjoon was there for all of that, actually. That's why it's only now that I'm cutting him out of my life."

Jimin makes a humming sound, an encouragement to keep talking.

Taehyung considers his next words carefully. "My grandparents are both transgender," he says, and bites on his lower lip.

Jimin looks up at that. "Oh wow," he says.

Taehyung nods. "It was a hard life for them," he says shortly. "They had to hide their genders for years, and then they lost my father, who was their only son. But they're both happy now. I cried so much for them when they managed to get their genders changed on the legal stuff."

"It doesn't sound like it's been easy for you too," Jimin says. His smaller fingers cling protectively tighter to Taehyung's own.

Taehyung takes a deep breath. "No, it hasn't," he agrees. "But my grandparents were the ones who encouraged me to pursue my artistic passions."

"Are you out to them?" Jimin asks.

Taehyung nods again. "I talked my halmeoni's head off about Namjoon as a child," he admits. "They knew him too, you know. It was so difficult for me when we broke up. My grandparents were very upset about it."

Jimin nods. "If he was part of the family in a sense, I can imagine how hard that must have been on you."

"It was so bad," Taehyung says.

Is it too soon to ask Jimin if he'd like to drive up to Geochang to meet them? Would it be too much, too soon?

Taehyung bites back the offer.

He needs to think on that one some more. He's very protective of his grandparents, particularly his halmeoni. She's dealt with enough transphobia in her lifetime.

Jimin turns to look at him. This is something new. It's an assessing look, and there's something torn and conflicted in his eyes.

"Your halmeoni," Jimin begins, still leading Taehyung by their joined hands. "When did she know?"

Taehyung thinks about that one. "She always knew," he says, after awhile. "I think it was during her time in the military though, that's when she knew. She was miserable. Why do you ask?"

"I wonder too," Jimin admits, his voice shaky. "I've wondered for awhile."

Oh. Taehyung feels doubly guilty about their first date now.

Oh fuck.

No wonder Jimin had been so upset with him and then gone and dressed up super-masc for their second date. He must have felt like Taehyung didn't want what he saw the first time around.

"It's confusing," Jimin says. "I was a dancer and a singer as a child. My parents are supportive now, which wasn't always the case but they let me do ballet as a child. I always felt so pretty, and beautiful when I danced. Like the prettiest man and woman both at the same time."

He turns to fix Taehyung with a sad smile. "I don't think that must make any sense," he says.

"It makes sense to me," Taehyung says. "But I think it's what makes sense to you that matters the most."

Jimin shrugs his shoulders at that. Taehyung struggles with saying what he wants to say in response when Jimin smoothly diverts their conversation to lighter topics. They talk about dramas they're hooked on at the moment. Taehyung shares some funny stories about his atelier.

It's a beautiful sunset which they manage to catch once they leave the greenhouse. Streaks of purple, pink and gold light the sky, as they share a strawberry pizza between them and sip from glasses of freshly pressed strawberry juice at a table in the farm restaurant's patio.

Jimin excuses himself to the washroom with a sweet smile. Taehyung watches the back of his full ass, biting his lip. He goes back to the online shop where he was looking at a pair of adorable bigender pride earrings with 22k gold vermeil hooks, and pretty swarovski beads.

They're a lot of money. It's already in Taehyung's shopping cart.

He worries his lip with his teeth some more.

It might be a bit presumptuous, but Jimin doesn't have to accept it if he doesn't like them.

He considers Jimin with his pouty mouth, and sweet smile. Jimin with his protective small hands and penchant for praise. Jimin with his large heart and compassionate nature.

The money is worth it for Jimin either way.

He hits the "Buy" button without a second thought.

~

It's well past 8PM when they get back to central Seoul.

"I feel like getting bingsu," Taehyung says, all of a sudden.

He doesn't want to let this day end. He's got work tomorrow morning, and so does Jimin. But he doesn't care. He hasn't stopped holding Jimin's hand.

As they got closer to Seoul, the intrusive staring started up once more as the subway got full again with tired students and office workers.

Jimin made to let go of Taehyung's hand once. Taehyung, however, held onto his hand extra tightly.

"You want to combine the fourth date with the third date?" Jimin teases. But he looks wistful, and Taehyung knows he doesn't want the night to end either.

"Yes," Taehyung says, and again, he smirks as his honesty disarms Jimin once more, making him giggle.

"Okay," Jimin says. "Where do you want to get it?"

"Let's go to Sulbing," Taehyung suggests, and gives him a cheesy wink. "Only the best bingsu for you, Jimin."

Jimin hits him lightly with his fists, but looks pleased that Taehyung suggested Sulbing. It's a popular date spot.

Taehyung takes the now-empty dosirak thermos bag from Jimin, holding it as they climb the steps out of Exit 7. The stairs are slippery, and they stop holding hands to help a halmeoni climb down the stairs. She looks terrified and there's no accessible elevator.

"You can do it," Taehyung tells her gently, and she lets out several frightened sounds. Jimin holds her around the waist, and together, they coax her down the stairs.

Her curls are frizzy and wet from the snow outside. Her eyes are wet with tears of pain and frustration.

Taehyung feels a familiar rise of anger all over again at the metropolitan government. This is why his grandparents have never made it out to Seoul ever. The lack of accessibility is a huge issue for them.

She breathes out a sigh of relief when they reach safe, dry ground.

"You are both good boys," she says shakily. "It is a good thing you have each other."

They blush, because they realized they unknowingly held hands again after letting her go.

She doesn't seem to care, and smiles at them, laughing tiredly.

"Everyone thinks we old folk are filled with hate," she says. "We're just trying to live another day like you young people. If someone is good for someone else, what does anything matter?"

Jimin finds his voice first.

"Thank you," he says, his voice thick with emotion.

Emboldened by her words, Taehyung bends down to kiss Jimin's cheek in front of her.

"He's very good for me," Taehyung tells her, with a big smile.

Jimin seems tonguetied, frozen throughout as an amused Taehyung pulls him up the exit stairs out into forever-bustling, lit up Myeongdong.

Taehyung leads Jimin forward this time, through the crowded walking streets of Myeongdong. Jimin follows, a shy smile on his face.

He doesn't miss the way Jimin's face lights up at a cute display of lip-shaped tinted balms in a Holika Holika display window.

"You want to go in?" Taehyung asks.

Jimin nods, but looks a little nervous.

Taehyung tugs on Jimin's hand. "Let's do it," he says. "I want a new tinted moisturizer too."

Jimin takes a deep breath. The store is usually frequented by cis women and schoolgirls so Taehyung understands Jimin's trepidation.

"Okay," Jimin says.

They walk in holding hands. Taehyung waves away the staff, and marches Jimin over to the tinted balms.

Some schoolgirls lurk in a corner and squeal under their breath at the sight which Taehyung catches. They're lurking in a corner and trying to take pictures of them.

Taehyung leaves Jimin for a second to swatch the balms on his skin, mumbling an excuse to look at the moisturizer he wants.

He strides up to the girls, and scowls at them.

"Please delete the pictures you took of us," Taehyung says, his voice cold. "We're not your Kpop oppas."

They pretend to ignore him, but Taehyung stands his ground.

"I can call the staff over and complain about you invading our privacy."

Sullenly, they make a show of deleting the pictures to Taehyung, and stomp out of the store.

Jimin is smiling when Taehyung returns to his side with the moisturizer he's interested in buying.

"Did you decide what flavour you want?" Taehyung asks.

"You didn't have to be so cold with them," Jimin replies with instead. He holds up the strawberry balm. "This one."

"I had to," Taehyung says. "Straight girls kept doing that to me and Namjoon a lot. He hated it but he also hated confrontations. So I got used to doing the callouts. Don't worry. I don't mind being the one that does it."

Jimin shakes his head, but he also looks soft and fond.

Taehyung plucks the balm out of Jimin's hand.

"I'm going to get this for you because I want to," Taehyung says. "I'm going to get you little gifts and other things from now on. Is that okay with you?"

Jimin doesn't put up much of a fight. Rather, he looks very pleased.

"I won't stop you," Jimin says, his tone coquettish. "I like gifts. But please don't go too overboard."

"Too late for that," Taehyung says under his breath, as he checks out the balm Jimin should have thought of that before he made Taehyung swoon with his under-salted food.

He smiles as he watches Jimin excitedly remove the packaging and apply the balm using a mirror in the store.

It doesn't take much, Taehyung realizes with a pang, to make Jimin happy.

~

"Tell me more," Taehyung says, after he brings the bowl of melon bingsu to the table, and they both start to dig in. "About your gender feelings."

Jimin flushes. Honestly, after he brought up his bigender identity, he felt so naked and vulnerable.

They've been opening up a lot to each other throughout this date, but Jimin was ... maybe never planning to tell Taehyung about this.

He'd felt conflicted about his gender identity as a child. Taemin had considerably helped being that his ex considered himself genderfluid too.

"I wasn't planning to tell you," Jimin admits. "But then you opened up to me about your grandparents and I really...I just needed to tell you then."

Taehyung squeezes Jimin's free hand with his own. "You wanted to tell me on our first date, didn't you?"

Jimin nods. "Yes," he says, his tone jerky. "That's why I dressed up in a very feminine way that day. I was thinking of. I don't know. This is so stupid."

"You were thinking of what, sweetheart?" Taehyung prompts him gently, his eyes darkly sensual, his voice smooth like silk.

Sweetheart. Jagiya.

Taehyung called him his sweetheart.

Jimin drops his spoon, and immediately Taehyung takes his other hand to hold as well, brushing the pads of his thumbs over the insides of Jimin's wrists which have always been rather sensitive to someone else's touch.

Jimin shivers and exhales shakily.

After Taemin, Jimin hasn't been touched or looked at like this in ages. He longs for gently intimate touch, so desperate for it because he's forgotten what it's like to be needed and valued by another man.

Taehyung's touch is a sensory overload.

"Sometimes," Jimin whispers. "I fantasize about being a woman so strongly I cry with longing. I want to dress up very feminine, in a dress and wig and a dolled up face, stroll down the fashion street outside Ewha Women's University, my hand tucked in a man's arm."

Taehyung's hands tighten around his.

"I have always had this fantasy," Jimin admits, with a shaky laugh, his eyes wet. "I imagine this fantasy man lovingly calling me his girlfriend. The next day, I feel and dress masc and I'm his boyfriend too. I'm his loved partner."

Taehyung keeps stroking the insides of his wrists with his thumbs.

"I wanted to tell you something before at the farm, and I lost my courage," Taehyung says roughly. "I found my courage to say it again."

Jimin laughs wetly. "What is it?"

"I think you are the prettiest man and woman I have ever seen," Taehyung says.

Jimin lets out a small, affected sob.

Taehyung reaches out to cup his cheeks, and wipe his tears.

And then, Taehyung leans in to press a gentle kiss on Jimin's lips in that Sulbing branch, at 9PM.

It's their first kiss. It's not Jimin's first kiss in his life by any means, but it's the first most meaningful kiss he's ever had in his life.

Hoseok was right about Taehyung.

Damnit. Hoseok is always right about everything.

~

Now that they've both broken the ice, and gotten to know some personal details about each other, things begin to romantically escalate, and Jimin is overwhelmed by the pace of it.

In a very good way.

Taehyung has let his guard down and it shows in Jimin's mail box.

"I like the idea of us writing actual, physical letters to each other," Taehyung said to Jimin shortly after they left Sulbing late that night. He'd giggled when Jimin leaned in to kiss his cheek.

"I love that," Jimin says, excited. "I've always wanted to do that for somebody."

So they're writing each other actual letters. It doesn't take long to arrive since they live in the same city. If Jimin posts a letter on Monday, he knows it'll reach Taehyung by Tuesday evening at the latest.

It's something fun to do at the end of a long day.

Something like writing a letter would normally classify as draining in Jimin's mental book but the thrill of recalling Taehyung's face, his gentle smile and fingers, his sensual eyes and mouth, the way he kissed Jimin that late night, the thrill is so strong it energizes Jimin.

He doesn't tell Hoseok about it but eventually his friend catches him one evening, writing in his nicest penmanship on good quality paper.

Jimin sulks when Hoseok doubles over from laughing hard.

"I knew it," he wheezes out. "I knew you two would do some cheesy shit like this."

Jimin sulks harder. Hoseok reaches out to ruffle his hair, messing it up.

"Hyung," Jimin whines. He should never have told Hoseok about how he came out to Taehyung and then about the way Taehyung had kissed him.

In his defense, it's hard not to gush about Taehyung.

"I told you," Hoseok brags, a cocky smile on his face. "Did I not tell you he is a good man? When he whisks you away to Canada to marry you, please remember in your speeches that it was me, Jung Hoseok, who birthed this union."

Jimin rolls his eyes, but blushes hard.

"Please stop," he mumbles, feeling hot just at the thought of Taehyung and him as a wedded couple. "We just started dating."

That makes Hoseok laugh. "We gays don't have the same timeline as the straights," he says. "Do you not see how fast Yoongi and Seokjin got together?"

Jimin smirks. "Yes, it took them less than a month to fall in love and move in together. So what is taking them so long to get you to shack up with them?"

Hoseok squeaks at that, and hurriedly takes his leave, face as red as a tomato.

"You didn't answer me," Jimin calls out, as the door bangs shut.

He laughs a bit to himself.

He feels like he's floating these days.

~

They decided to be old-fashioned and establish their next date via letters. But Taehyung's dying to see Jimin again before a formal date, and he can't wait.

He calls Jimin up one afternoon, after a particularly draining calligraphy workshop at his atelier.

"Do you like the idea of painting your nails?" Taehyung asks, bluntly getting to the point when Jimin picks up.

Jimin makes a surprised sound. "I-I do," Jimin says, a tad bit hesitant. "Why?"

"Well," Taehyung says. He takes a deep breath, staring at both the earrings and the other item he purchased for Jimin last night on an impulsive whim. "I'm having a really shitty day at work, and all I can think of is coming to your place or you coming to mine."

"Oh," Jimin says. "That's okay. I can come over to your place."

It sounds like Jimin has something more to say. Taehyung waits.

"Sounds like you need a pretty girl to make everything alright again," Jimin says, in a rush.

A satisfied smile grows on Taehyung's face. Warmth takes root in his chest.

"I do," He drawls out. "There's this one girl I had specifically in mind. She's very pretty and she hates mushrooms."

"Mushrooms?" Jimin asks. "Mushrooms taste awful. I must say I agree with her."

"Well," Taehyung says. "Even if I must say I disagree with this ridiculous statement, she's invited to my apartment at 7 because I want to do her nails. I'll have fried chicken and beer. Does that sound good?"

"Make it any white wine, and I'll be there," Jimin says sweetly.

Taehyung hangs up after a few minutes, and screams into his hands.

His shitty day isn't shitty anymore.

~

Taehyung said to come in PJs.

Jimin stares at her fuzzy pink pants, and matching night shirt before entering in the pass code. This will probably turn into a sleepover, and she does want that so she took care to shower and smell nice for Taehyung in case he wants to hold her.

They're probably not going to do anything sexual tonight. Even if Jimin is aching for it, she knows she isn't ready. Despite knowing this, she's wearing soft silk panties with a pouch that is comfortable enough to not make her feel restricted and she used her butt cream.

The one that makes her butt feel as smooth and soft as a baby's. It's okay if they don't do anything either. She just wants to feel sexy and desirable.

It's her first time being with another man and boldly being herself. It's scary, but she is dying to know what it's like.

Taehyung told her that he just showered, and would probably fall asleep which is why he gave her the passcode so she could let herself into his apartment.

His apartment is surprisingly clean. She doesn't know why she's surprised. The apartment is cozy and homey however.

He's got little knickknacks everywhere, and she pauses to admire all his paintings that he's put up and framed.

There's one hanging right above Taehyung's leather couch in the living room, of both his parents and grandparents. Jimin pauses to study that one, her heart aching.

This is a highly realistic painting. His Appa and Omma seem to have been a really goodlooking couple. Taehyung takes after his Appa and Halmeoni. His Halbi is shorter than his Halmeoni. They look like a very sweet couple.

Everyone looks so happy. Jimin sighs.

Taehyung told her his Omma's parents are homophobic and transphobic so he doesn't talk to them. There's no signs of his other set of grandparents anywhere in the apartment. She's not surprised by that. Taehyung hates homophobic and transphobic people with a passion.

"There is no excuse for bigotry of any kind," he wrote in his first letter to Jimin itself.

"Is my family and me and you not worthy of love and acceptance? Are we not simply people trying to get by in this world like anyone else?"

Her lips twitch up into a helpless smile just recalling those lines, passionately written in Taehyung's messy Hangul.

She likes him so much, and she can't stop. She's liking him more and more and more as the days pass.

It's both so frightening and so good.

There's a framed picture of Taehyung, bare-chested on a yacht with some other men who look older and mature than him.

His friends circle, she recalls. Taehyung did tell her via a letter that his friends are all gay and bisexual men in their thirties.

A flush rises in her cheeks as she studies his shirtless chest. He's not buff, she realizes, and bites her lip. His tummy is soft and hairy in the picture.

An avalanche of want rises in Jimin's chest, as she registers this new information.

She wants. She needs.

She pads into his kitchen, and curiously opens his fridge. The sight of ... nothing but the bottle of white wine she asked for, several soju bottles and beer cans make her both laugh and huff in concern. She eventually got it out of him via letters, he does drink sometimes. When he's depressed, he bingedrinks a lot. Still, Jimin is concerned about the abject lack of produce in his fridge.

Does he survive just on takeout!?

She needs to fix that.

He's fast asleep, just like he said he would be, even snoring lightly, out like a light under his comforter. Jimin giggles softly at the sight because it looks like he's wearing dark blue silk PJs, and his long, dark hair is all mussed up and still shower-damp.

Cute. So cute.

Jimin clucks her tongue, and tries to find his linen closet. It's out in the hallway leading to his bedroom, and she pulls out a small towel.

She knows she's going to wake him up by doing this but he went to sleep with wet hair so it's really his own fault.

Taehyung stirs in his sleep, turning over to lie on his back, as Jimin towel-dries his hair.

His eyes crack open, and he flashes Jimin a drowsy smile.

"Oh wow, there's a pretty girl in my bed," he slurs. "How did I get so lucky?"

Jimin rolls her eyes but continues to dry his hair as gently as she can with the towel.

"Don't sweet-talk me, Kim Taehyung," she warns. "There's nothing in your fridge except booze and you went to sleep with wet hair."

"And she's fussing over me," Taehyung continues, undeterred, smiling at her. "I am very lucky."

Jimin's cheeks heat up. "Come on," she says, flustered. "You've been asleep for an hour. I saw the takeout on the counter. Let's eat, I'm hungry."

"Alright, alright." Taehyung yawns widely, and groans, pulling away the comforter. He takes the towel from Jimin, toweling his own hair dry. She takes his outstretched hand, and lets him lead her out to the kitchen, smiling, unable to stop.

Under the bright kitchen light, Taehyung cups her hot cheeks, and kisses her for the second time.

She sighs, wrapping her arms around his waist. This time, she opens her mouth, and he takes the hint, using tongue to explore her.

Whimpering, Jimin holds onto Taehyung tighter.

His skin is warm even over the silk.

When he pulls away, he's smiling against her mouth, still holding her cheeks, his large palms enveloping them entirely.

"Pabo," Jimin accuses in a whisper, but without any heat, fond and soft. Idiot, in Korean. "You couldn't wait, huh?"

Taehyung lowers his hands to hold and hug her. She sighs, burying her face in his neck.

"You look so pretty and soft and you smell so good," Taehyung murmurs. "I want to kiss you and never stop."

"Nobody said you have to stop kissing me," Jimin says, a lump in her throat.

Taehyung waggles his brows repeatedly, and Jimin rolls her eyes.

She tugs him down by the towel hanging around his neck, and pulls him in for a third kiss. And a fourth. And a fifth.

She wants to lose count.

~