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Jack woke with a start, his heart pounding. As he understood where he was, it beat faster still. In bed. In Dracula’s bed, with the vampire lying naked beside him. He was also naked. He tried to convince himself that for most of his existence, sleeping without clothes would have been everyday normal for the vampire and he probably hadn’t given it much thought when he undressed him as well. But he couldn’t remember immediately what had happened before he fell asleep or passed out, whichever it had been. He could hear the storm still raging outside, the rain coming down hard and pelting the windows, the wind howling. Not being able to remember in the moment if Dracula had forced him to have sex, molested him, or would once he knew Jack was awake, he began to shiver. He tried to stop, and to inch away, but he couldn’t stop the shaking.
“Shh. It’s only the storm. Sleep, Jack.” A palm rested between his shoulders, warm and soothing. The vampire was as warm as any human, not frighteningly, off-puttingly cold. The hand touched his hair, caressing gently.
Jack began to remember. He’d had a vision, a bad one that he couldn’t break out of, nor could Dracula bring him out, though he’d tried. Eventually the vampire had stripped off his clothes and bundled him into bed. There was something to be said for body heat, as the visions did release their grip, he did warm, and consequently was able to relax a little. Dracula had never been anything but supportive when he was having the terrifying visions, he had to admit that.
Once he’d remembered the earlier events, he hadn’t been as frightened or repulsed as he once would have been when Dracula caressed him, surprisingly gently, and also kissed him. The kisses were at first soft and non-threatening, though they gradually became more clearly sensual, if restrained. The vampire had gone no further, seemingly intent on comforting and calming him more than anything else. He hadn’t behaved as if he intended to force himself on Jack at all, to his surprise. If anything more than comfort was involved, Jack had the feeling it would have been honest seduction, not intimidation.
If Dracula had wanted to, he could have molested or raped him any time in the past two months, yet he hadn’t. Jack had begun to believe it was possible that the vampire really did want him to want to be with him, to stay with him without coercion. He would have fought that idea to his dying breath in the early days. Now, he wasn’t so sure.
No one in his entire life except Dr Helsing and Zev had ever shown him any kindness, any gentleness or care. He’d never really mattered as himself, Jack, to anyone. While at first he’d believed that Dracula did such things only to control him, he was no longer so sure about that either. Too many times, in too many situations, he could have been harsh with him but had been the opposite. If the vampire had loved Jonathan Harker, as he claimed, it wasn’t beyond the realm of possibility that he could come to feel the same about him. He couldn’t imagine why, though. He was so messed up, so worthless and incapable, he didn’t know why anyone would genuinely want him.
It scared the hell out of him in one sense, but beyond that, he wasn’t sure how he felt about their relationship to this point. The gentle touches and the comforting kindness were very seductive, especially if they were honest. But how could he come to terms with having any sort of willing relationship with a monster. Was he such a monster at this point? Could he, would he be again?
Dr Helsing had tied them together to make Jack stronger and Dracula more mindful of others. Maybe that was happening to both of them already. Jack didn’t feel strong, though he did feel a bit more stable, more grounded with Dracula caring for him and looking out for him. The burden of looking over his shoulder every minute of his life had become almost intolerable, leading to destructive behavior.
Extreme loneliness had always gone along with the fear. How, he wondered, could Dracula not be lonely too, having lived 500 years compared to his own slightly more than a quarter of a single century. Yes, he could see that they might need each other in that way too. Dr Helsing had clearly believed it, had wanted it for both of them as some sort of macabre matchmaking, and she had known both of them better than anyone else could. Whatever Dracula might feel, Jack wasn’t sure what he felt. All the same, he found he was no longer repulsed by the vampire and no longer afraid of him most of the time. The count was still pretty unpredictable though, and Jack never knew what would set him off into frustrated anger and threats of violence against others, if not him.
A loud clap of thunder broke close by, and Jack flinched at the sudden noise followed by the flash of lightning through the drapes.
“It’s all right. Come. Come here, and nothing can hurt you.” Dracula’s deep voice in his ear was low and comforting. He touched his shoulder as if to roll Jack back to face him, but he left the decision up to him.
With a shaky sigh, Jack rolled over and moved into the vampire’s arms, letting his head rest on Dracula’s chest. If there was no steady heartbeat, still he breathed occasionally, and his body was warm.
"Better?"
"Mm," Jack allowed himself to respond.
Dracula chuckled softly at Jack’s attempt to be non-committal, pleased that the young man’s natural instinct for physical and emotional comfort no longer excluded him.
“You’re safe,” he murmured against Jack’s hair, petting him softly. Jack let out a cross between a whine and a sigh, and relaxed in his arms. To the vampire, the small surrender was seen as a victory.
***
They didn’t speak of that night, or the nights after it when Jack had nightmares, or couldn’t sleep or was afraid to fall asleep and they ended up sharing the big bed. Neither of them were eager to share emotions or many words. For a long time, the kisses were as far as they went. Kisses that were actually much like the comfort Jack had shared with Zev. Certainly they no longer frightened him, and he returned the kisses, shy but sincere. He no longer had thoughts of escape.
They continued to get used to each other and come to terms with the situation and their feelings - or rather, Jack did. Dracula never let on what he was thinking or feeling and that left a barrier between them. The vampire perhaps had his own fears, but he wouldn’t share them any more than Jack would.
One night, about a month after the storm, Jack became aware of Dracula staring at him intensely across the dining room table. Jack realized what was was behind the gaze. He wasn’t really surprised. Dracula had been remarkably patient with him and by this time it was clear he had no desire to coerce or hypnotize him into doing anything he didn’t want to; it would be his choice what they did together, if he agreed. He decided he was okay with that. The knowledge that the vampire had held back for so long, never forcing him, waiting until he was ready yet not knowing if he ever would be, touched Jack. He could actually believe Dracula had feelings of deep affection for him, perhaps his definition of love after all. As he’d said from the beginning, Jack was his number one. It really seemed to be true.
“Jack - “
The blue eyes looked directly into Dracula’s and the young man’s mouth curved slightly upward.
“Yes. But-“
“I know. I know.”
Jack would have to trust that he did know that he needed to go slow and not to push him.
He was undressed slowly, Dracula pressing his lips to each newly revealed bit of flesh. Jack closed his eyes and concentrated on the sensations, the experience, the vampire was trying to give him. He looked, though, when he was naked and lying back across the bed and Dracula loomed over him for the few minutes he was shedding his own clothes.
The count was a big man, in every way. Tall and broad-chested, with a torso and legs that seemed to go on forever, and a cock that was in proportion to the rest of him. Jack had seen him before of course on those other nights, but he’d put the sexual frame out of his mind then. Tonight, he couldn’t. The vampire was everything, physically, Jack wasn’t. The sight of him was beginning to turn Jack on, and Dracula noticed.
“Beautiful,” he acknowledged, lying next to Jack and carding his fingers softly through his hair, kissing him lazily for a few minutes before deepening the kisses, hungry in a way that was half playful, half serious. His hand moved slowly over Jack’s body, caressing, only gradually seeking to arouse. He was pleased that Jack was openly responsive, and less shy than he often was.
“I do please you?” Dracula asked. “You’re enjoying this?”
The usually shy eyes looked straight into his, and Jack smiled rather dreamily.
“Yes,” he murmured. “Definitely yes,” he whispered, his voice husky with arousal. But not just arousal, desire as well; genuine desire for his lover.
Dracula was so affected that he halted to drink in the moment, to remember it. His hard-won restraint, and the expression of his true feelings for Jack, had succeeded where force would have ruined it all. Agatha-Zoe had understood him better than he understood himself.
“I’m glad, iubitul meu,” he smiled down at Jack. “No matter how things may have appeared, I have only sought to win you, not force you. I have never had to ask before, or wait. I have frightened you in the process.”
“Well, there’s bad scary and good scary. You don’t frighten me in the same way as before,” Jack confessed. “Tonight is scary good,” he grinned slightly.
Dracula laughed at that, a real laugh of happy amusement, and leaned over to put his mouth where his emotions were. He licked and sucked and made love to Jack from head to toe and then began again, until Jack was writhing in frustration and lust.
“Shall I take care of you now, comoara mea?” he asked, taking Jack’s cock in his hand and pulling firmly. Jack whined.
“If you don’t I’m going to kill you,” he rasped, both of them well aware of the absurdity of the comment.
“Yes, my Jackie,” Dracula purred, smiling, as his mouth engulfed Jack’s straining cock.
It was so good. Not that he’d had a wide variety of people sucking him off. Zev would have been delighted to, but that wouldn’t have been fair to him. Lucy had done her bit, but Jack had always felt her heart wasn’t really in pleasuring him. This was..amazing. Dracula knew exactly where, what, just enough, too much, and it was making him crazy with lust, and other feelings for his lover. The vampire was making love to him - to him. He felt it, and he was lost to it. When Dracula took him deep and withdrew slowly, there was just an edge - just the slightest hint - of his fangs raking ever so delicately along the shaft. It was perfectly, as he’d said, ‘scary good.’
“If you keep doing that,” he moaned, “oh..ohh God.” Of course, the vampire did continue doing ‘that’ until he felt Jack’s entire body begin to shudder and his back arched reflexively, begging for release. Dracula sucked hard, and Jack groaned loudly and erupted.
The count would have every drop of him, tasting Jack’s sweet bravery in each swallow. By the copious amount of his issue, it had obviously been awhile since he’d had any sort of release. Dracula was very pleased that he’d been able to do this for the sad and damaged young man he loved. Had Agatha-Zoe known he would come to care for him so obsessively? Hoped, planned? It didn’t matter any more, for it was, and there was nothing he could do about it.
Jack moved to curl against him, breathing heavily, limbs twitching slightly.
“Are you all right?” The vampire ventured. Jack snorted loudly.
“Soooooo all right,” he sighed. “So perfect. G’me a second and I’ll try to return the favor.”
“You don’t have to-“
“Course I do, don’ be silly,” Jack laughed, running his hand over the vampire’s chest and abdomen, brushing his fingers through the abundant dark hair that crowned his semi-erection. “But I want to,” he assured, “even though I won’ be all that good at it. I want to,” he repeated.
Within a few minutes, Dracula was covered in Jack, his hands and mouth roaming over him, stroking and caressing, relaxed and playful. It was so much more than he’d expected. The sight of dreamy, now-satisfied Jack pulling and licking his erection, hair fallen in his eyes, made him want to let go, to really let Jack in, but at the same time it was too soon. This was one time; the first time. It was certainly magic, but magic, as well as lightning, didn’t always or even often strike again. Dear Jack, I want it to be, but I haven’t trusted a single soul in five hundred years. If I trust anyone it would be you, yet -
He’d apologetically admitted he wasn’t skilled, but the truth was Dracula felt as if he might come just from the sight, smell and feel of Jack, and the knowledge that he’d come with him willingly tonight and had said he wanted to pleasure him. That was arousal enough, but the earnest, slightly clumsy hands and mouth made the experience that much more intense. He stroked the hair back out of Jack’s eyes, caressing his face.
“I want it to be as good for you as you made it for me, but you’ve had 500 years of experience, and I-“ Jack shrugged bashfully. “I want to make you come,” he whispered, taking the vampire in his mouth again.
At that declaration, Dracula had no hope of holding back. His sudden ejaculation took Jack by surprise and sprayed him before he thought to take the vampire’s cock in his mouth and suck him to softness.
“Come here,” Dracula rasped hoarsely, barely capable of speech. He tugged gently to bring Jack’s face close to his own, licking and kissing his own seed from his young lover’s face and lips.
Jack was quite exhausted now, and the vampire’s limbs felt strangely heavy as well. Between them, they barely managed to snug into each other and turn out the light before Jack fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.
***
Jack woke to a large, heavy weight on his chest. Dracula lay unmoving, half over him, facing away, head resting below his chin. The vampire’s thick black hair tickled his neck. He knew Dracula did sleep, but not routinely - at least, not to this point in his experience. He became aware of something emanating from him. He couldn’t discern whether it was a vibration, like a genuine physical manifestation, or a psychic one, an actual sound or only perceived. He couldn’t quantify it, as it was very subtle. It was almost like, and had the effect on him, of a cat purring contentedly. It created a peaceful, dream-like mood.
The night had settled something for him. He did have a love for Dracula. It might not be everyone’s definition of ideal romantic love, others would term it dependence or something else or tell him he’d been brainwashed, he knew that. He also knew that Dracula cared about him, wanted him above all others, and was there for him when he needed someone, needed help with his messed up, complicated nightmare of memories and life.
Yes, he’d been emotionally seduced by the kindness and the tenderness, and now he’d been literally seduced, and along with that had gotten a peek into Dracula the man, who’d had an even more screwed up life and sense of the way things were meant to be than he did. But last night, Jack had actually felt love, and responded fully to it. He wouldn’t question it again. He wanted to give it back, without caring if it was logical, smart, dangerous or anything else.
He put a hand on Dracula’s shoulder, rubbing softly. He felt the vampire’s muscles tighten, then gradually relax.
“It’s only me,” he murmured.
“You are not ‘only,’ Jack Seward. You must start believing that,” Dracula replied, not moving.
“It’s going to take me awhile,” Jack sighed. “You help with that.”
“Are you all right this morning?” the vampire hazarded.
Jack sighed and chuckled softly.
“Perfect. Really perfect. And you..how do you feel about what happened? And you know what I mean,” he added. “Look at me, please,” he asked quietly. Dracula remained still for so long Jack thought he was angry, but eventually he rose on one elbow and did look at him.
The black eyes were soft and full of emotion, more open than he’d hoped for. Yet there was still something held back. Jack didn’t blame him for that, God knew. It would have been more surprising if it wasn’t there.
“It was an unexpectedly special night for me as well,” the vampire confessed. “You surprised me, in the best way. You were brave, and kind. I have not deserved it, but you gave yourself in a way I hadn’t dared to hope…" Dracula stopped, and would say no more.
Jack took a deep breath. Things had come so far between them in the past twelve hours. He decided that what he was about to say, and do, was worth the risk of too much, too soon.
"If anyone has a right to be distrustful of people," he began, "it's you. I know that no words I say will open the gates by themselves. I understand, how could I not? But I want you to know that I’m done with doubting, and being afraid of you..of us. I want to be with you, and it’s not just about the sex. That’s incredible, but it’s not everything for me. I want you to understand that, and to believe it," Jack finished softly, pulling Dracula down to lie as he had been, stroking his hair, caressing his face.
"There is your bravery again, my Jackie," Dracula murmured. "How do you know everything I can’t say - that I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to say?" he sighed. "I hear your words and I want to believe them, but what you want is frightening to me," he admitted in a whisper. "Me controlling you, controlling our relationship, that comes easily. What you desire is neither easy nor simple. I don’t know, Jackie. I don’t know. I can’t promise anything.”
"It’s all right," Jack soothed, stroking his shoulder. They lay in silence after that as the sun rose and light began to fill the room. Jack became aware of whatever it was that had earlier emanated from the vampire again slowly vibrating through his own body. A low hum, a gentle rumble that relaxed him, almost like a tranquilizer, or taking a few hits from a joint. It felt like a large cat was purring in his arms. Jack smiled to himself. It would work somehow. He didn’t want to think any further than that for now.
***
Things were different between them after that, but they weren’t perfect. There were bumps in the road as there are for any relationship, and they had more to overcome than most, issues no one but the two of them would ever be forced to deal with.
Their lovemaking continued to be as meaningful and as intimate as it had been that first night. Jack sought even greater intimacy between them. He didn’t push, but rather led by example. He was as physically affectionate towards Dracula when they weren’t having sex as when they were.
The one way Jack thought he might get through to the vampire was by simple touch. None of those who had feared him would ever have wanted to willingly touch him. He would always have known that those he mesmerized and charmed weren’t really responding to him. Jack wanted him to understand he was doing exactly that, responding to the man inside. It was the single weapon he had.
He wasn’t shy about touching Dracula in or out of the bedroom. A hand on the back, an arm about his waist, a come-from-behind hug with Jack resting his head against his lover’s back. He even, depending on where they were at the time, took his hand or arm as they walked on the street. It was the only thing he could do, knowing that words weren’t enough to tell Dracula he was no longer the terrifying Count Dracula to Jack, he was someone Jack loved regardless.
For a while, Dracula was disconcerted and perplexed when Jack did these things, unsure how he felt and unsure how to react, yet he never felt as if he wanted to stop him doing them. If the intimacy made him slightly uncomfortable at first, he was drawn to it as well. It was as soothing as it was frightening, and it gradually became more a comfort than any negative feeling. The gestures, as they continued, did make him feel cared about. Perhaps he could even acknowledge he was beginning to understand feeling loved.
He became able over time to reciprocate without feeling a loss of control. Vulnerability, he struggled with. Through all of his existence, to be vulnerable meant death because there was no one at his back or at his side. Letting Jack inside in the way Jack had let him in was frightening, but it was also, as Jack would say, scary good.
Before this, however, had come Jack’s last hurdle and his final surrender of trust to Dracula. During foreplay, the vampire’s hands attempted to explore a part of Jack’s anatomy that had been off the table, if not precisely off limits, up to now. Jack allowed it to go on, yet there was a tenseness in him that the vampire could both see and feel. As loathe was he was to speak of such things, or of feelings between them, this was a situation where it was unavoidable.
“I need you to be completely honest with me, Jack Seward. It doesn’t get more important than this, between us. Do you want this, or do you not want it?” he asked quietly. Jack blinked and looked down, then back at Dracula.
“I do want it. Very much. But I-I…” Jack shuddered and wouldn’t go on.
“Is it me, or is it your father?” Dracula asked softly.
Jack first went white, and then crimson. He didn’t always remember that his lover would know all his secrets. This one, he was both deeply ashamed of and unable to conquer..at least, his body wasn’t able to get past it no matter how much his mind had been trying.
“It’s not you,” he breathed. Tears filled his pale eyes and Dracula’s heart, the one that existed only for Jack, was pierced.
“Oh Jackie,” he murmured, pulling Jack gently into his arms, cradling him. “If I had known half of what I know now about your father, he would still be alive and I would enjoy killing him by millimetres,” he growled.
“I want you. I want you to. I’ve even dreamed about it. But my body has a memory, and I can’t get past the fear,” Jack whimpered. “All I remember is the pain, and how he enjoyed hurting me.” He shivered violently, and Dracula held him tighter.
“I don’t want to hurt you in any way, ever. Do you believe that?”
“Yes.”
“Truly?” Dracula pressed.
"Yes."
"You know I can make it so that you’ll feel no pain, no fear. So your body will not betray you. You’ve felt this before. It will take you past your fear, your body’s fear, and allow you to relax and enjoy what we both want. But I will not do it unless you’re absolutely certain. In this I don’t want to think you might be unwilling in any way," the vampire stressed. "Do not agree only to please me."
"No, it’s for me, because I want it. I want you inside me, without fear. I want to enjoy it, without remembering him and what he did to me. Kiss me," he whispered.
The kiss began soft and tender, with Jack pliant in his lover’s arms, and finished in mutual simmering arousal. Jack nuzzled at his throat.
"Do it. There’s just one thing..or maybe two things."
"And these things are?"
"Um..your nails? And..do you have something for lube?" Jack’s voice was a bit shaky on the last question.
"It will be all right," Dracula rumbled in his ear. He sat up and rummaged in the bedside table, placing a bottle of lubricant on the bed between them, and a small manicure kit beside it.
"Do what’s necessary," he invited. Jack nodded and opened the case. He made fairly quick work of clipping and filing the middle fingers of the vampire’s right hand.
"How long have you had that?" Jack asked, motioning to the lube and the manicure kit.
"For some time." Dracula had never said anything about it nor given any indication of his desire for their use until tonight, well into their intimacy, and he’d given thought as well to exactly what might be needed. How different things were now than when they’d met, and when Agatha-Zoe had bound them together, unwilling and hostile.
Jack smiled. "Do it now." He had no expectations, since when Dracula had mesmerized or tranced him before, he’d been completely unaware of it. His lover smiled at him and nodded.
Dracula’s black eyes gazed straight into Jack’s as a hand caressed slowly down Jack’s spine, settling at the top of his buttocks. As the heat of the vampire’s hand penetrated, he smiled gently and his lips moved. Jack wasn’t sure if he actually heard real words or if it was only in his mind that they were spoken, soft and warm, wrapping him in a cocoon of ease and peace. He was no longer afraid of what would happen, but he could definitely still feel. His desire that Dracula possess him was intact, and his physical responses and feelings were very much present, and normal. He was stroked and sucked and caressed to frustration, soothed, and then brought back to a strong moaning, gasping climax.
As he recovered, his lover’s mouth and fingers explored his crevice, making love to the entrance to his body. Gentle stroking over the perineum, back to the pinkish bud, a wet finger circling, teasing softly, making his body want penetration. In the farthest recesses of his mind, a very distant memory flickered that this was something he shouldn’t want, but it felt so good and Dracula was arousing him so perfectly that the memory receded into nothingness. It wasn’t important; this, now, was all.
A cold sensation, and then a finger slid into him carefully, not far, withdrawn, and then invaded again. This was accompanied by kisses, nuzzles, and barely discernible whispered words that Jack knew were real, and not English. He experienced an overwhelming sense of love and caring, letting himself float on the pleasure Dracula was giving him.
As the fingers explored deeper, carefully stretching and easing him, they would bump up against his prostate. He gasped, and groaned, his hands clawing at the sheets. The first couple of times he did this Dracula was alarmed, and stopped.
The vampire was largely unfamiliar with sounds of male sexual pleasure. Most men he had possessed before now had been unwilling, either angry or terrified, and in pain. He himself had rarely uttered a sound when having sex, though now that he and Jack were making love regularly, he had made some quite uncontrolled noise. The loss of control embarrassed him, but Jack had never teased and only encouraged him. He might not have used the term ‘making love’ aloud, but he definitely knew that what he did with Jack was entirely consensual and worlds away from most of his previous experiences with men or women. Jack’s current groans and whimpers unnerved him. He was determined that his suflet pereche, his soulmate, should not suffer on his account.
"Jackie, am I hurting you?" he asked anxiously.
"No," came the response. "Noooo. Why’d you stop?" Jack whined.
"You’ll tell me if I am."
" ‘ess. But you’re nooot. Pleasemore. Sogood."
Satisfied, the vampire repeated his actions several more times as Jack twisted in pleasure and continued to gasp and moan. He lay on his back now, open in more ways than one, and Dracula was reassured because he could see the expressions on his lover’s face.
As Jack was finally breached, slowly and with a restraint the vampire would not have thought himself capable of if asked, his eyes smiled into Dracula’s.
"Yesss," he moaned. "Fill me. I need-"
The vampire groaned now.
"Jackie, you’ll take away my control," he warned.
"Love me. I need all of you," Jack pleaded. As Dracula obeyed, sheathing himself in his lover, Jack’s head arched back and a pleased ‘ohhhh’ escaped him. Dracula did not move in him, but leaned forward to kiss his open mouth, his chest and his belly.
"Comoara," the vampire breathed.
"What does it mean?" Jack asked, arching up to deepen the contact.
"Treasure."
Jack smiled, pleased. "Fuck me," he demanded softly.
Dracula allowed a groan to escape, and granted his wish. Jack grasped his flanks and tried to hold on, though the vampire was sweating now - yet one more thing becoming attached to Jack Seward had demanded of him.
Jack moaned and whimpered and clutched at him, but his smile, the one that reached his eyes, remained. Both of them were lost in the rhythm, the sounds of Dracula’s balls slapping against Jack’s arse filling the room.
"I love you," Jack gasped, desperate for Dracula to believe him. It was both enough and too much for the vampire, who came with an audible moan, shooting deep inside him. Jack clung to him, not letting him go, forcing Dracula to collapse heavily over him.
“Perfect,” he murmured in his lover’s ear. “Thank you for giving me this memory to replace all the bad ones,” he crooned, stroking the powerfully muscled body, coaxing him to relax. Within a few minutes, Jack’s whole body was penetrated by Dracula’s vibrations, louder than he’d heard them thus far. The purr effect was strong, and Jack simply lay and enjoyed it, ruffling his lover’s hair softly.
He’d decided that he would not mention the phenomenon. He didn’t believe Dracula was aware of it, and he didn’t want him to feel self-conscious or try to stop it, when it was so clearly a demonstration of his happiness and contentment with Jack. He also realized that when Dracula called him Jackie now, his feelings were completely opposite to the way he’d used the name at the beginning of their relationship. Every time he said ‘Jackie,’ and every time he gave out the unconscious vibrations, Dracula was saying ‘I love you,’ whether he ever uttered the words or not.
***
Jack’s love had tamed him to their body and soul bonding as much as he could ever be tamed, but outside the house, outside their relationship, there were things Dracula could not change and he could only hope Jack understood that and would know both their limits. The time was coming when they would need to discuss the practicalities of their life together, but for the present Dracula was more than content to enjoy the only true, fully reciprocated love he’d ever experienced. He was a hedonistic creature and had always enjoyed sensual pleasures.
Because of all the years he’d spent on the ocean floor, Dracula was not a lover of water. He showered quickly when he had to and that was the extent of his involvement. It took a while for Jack to convince him that while water had its uses, it also held pleasure. Jack coaxed him into the shower, holding and caressing him, washing his hair and body, massaging his scalp. When he’d become comfortable with that, it was baths together in the tub large enough for two. He did it to humor Jack at first, but he was ultimately won over to the comfortable, intimate relaxation time that was its own pleasure. He now associated Jack and water with being able to drop his guard and feel, both physically and emotionally.
It was the hot tub, though, that they both enjoyed the most. Because of its configuration, it was easy and comfortable for Dracula to lie cradled in Jack’s arms, with neither of them uncomfortable and with plenty of room for his long legs. Jack enjoyed holding and spoiling him, and he enjoyed it too. It had been Jack’s natural nurturing quality, his desire to both give and receive physical affection honestly, which was what had broken down the barriers between them. If he realized at some point that it had been deliberate, he didn’t mind. It had worked, after all.
When he asked Jack what he wanted, how he could please him, the answer was always the same. Hold me close. Touch me, love me. Don’t leave me alone. Jack often needed him in order to sleep. Dracula, who had rarely slept before they met, found that the more content he was with Jack, the more fulfilling their lovemaking and its aftermath, the more he slept naturally. His arms wrapped around Jack, feeling the rise and fall of his chest and hearing his quiet breathing, relaxed him like a drug.
***
Dracula noticed that Jack seemed somehow not himself. He was twitchy, fidgety, but denied anything being wrong for a couple of days before he said abruptly, out of the blue, “You haven’t, um, fed for a while.” The vampire grimaced inwardly.
“No, I haven’t. I’ve been having trouble with that. Come, sit here with me,” Dracula suggested, pulling Jack to the sofa.
“Why?” Jack asked, puzzled. “You need to feed. I’ve seen you, when you think I won’t - you’re beginning to move like a middle-aged human, because you’re not getting enough nourishment. It worries me. Is there something wrong?”
The vampire smiled slightly, reaching out to touch Jack’s cheek.
“It’s because I no longer want to feed from you. It’s not that anything is wrong with you, or me, it’s - I no longer view you as prey, or someone to be used, a vessel. I see you now as..something different. But not in the way my brides were different. Not like that at all. I don’t want to invade you or hurt you,” the vampire attempted to explain. “Also, there will be a time when you might be ill, or suffer an accident, and for me to feed from you then would make you worse or might even kill you. I no longer want to take that risk. I need to find another way - which is also why I haven’t said anything,” he confessed. “I knew we would need to talk about my feeding..elsewhere. I haven’t wanted to have that talk.”
“Oh.” Jack took a moment to process this. He flushed slightly and smiled in return.
“That means so much. It makes me - happy doesn’t even begin to... I know, I babble it too often for your comfort, but I - “
“And I have never said it,” Dracula sighed.
“Of course you have. You just did,” Jack assured him, snugging himself under his lover’s chin. “The specific words aren’t necessary. You can stop worrying about that. Promise?” he murmured, one hand caressing Dracula’s neck.
“Huh,” the vampire evaded, pressing his lips to Jack’s silky hair, so unlike his own coarse mane.
“As for the rest - I know what you are. I know what you’ve needed to do to survive this long. I’ve never really expected I would be enough, no matter what Dr Helsing thought. You’re a big guy,” he teased, “and I’m not. I’ve tried not to think about specifics, but..I’d rather have you with me, and healthy, whatever you have to do to stay that way.” Jack revealed.
The vampire’s throat tightened. “Oh, Jackie,” he whispered, cradling him close.
“But we’ll think of something as a supplement. I have access to the blood bank, and the donor records. I can fiddle things a bit in the short term until we come up with a more workable long-term solution. Can’t have you starving and fading away,” Jack insisted lightly.
“But there’s something you should know, for right now. Dr Helsing made it sound simple, clean and tidy, my condition, but it’s not. There are side effects and symptoms, and not having any treatment could be as fatal as anything you would do, probably more,” Jack revealed. “My body needs you to feed from me. I’ve been feeling pretty bad,” he admitted.
“What do you mean?” Dracula demanded. “How long have you felt ill, and why didn’t you tell me this sooner?”
“Come on, you know communication isn’t our strong point, either of us,” Jack responded, making a face. “My joints are painful. Sometimes I can’t catch my breath. I could have a stroke, or a blood clot or even a heart attack,” he revealed.
“You should have told me when it first started,” Dracula groaned. “Shit.”
“Yes, and yes,” Jack sighed.
“I don’t like the thought of you suffering because of me. It makes me angry. Don’t do it again.”
The fact that he left off the “please” told Jack how upset he was.
“I won’t. We’ll have to practice talking more, fucking a little less,” Jack joked. “Only a tiny bit less though,” he added with hug.
“Jaack,” Dracula groaned. “It isn’t amusing to me.”
“Not a lot of fun for me either,” Jack reminded him, “but it is what it is.”
“How long will you feel ill after I-“
“I’ll start to improve tomorrow. If you do it now.” There was a hint of fear in Jack’s voice as if he felt he was still convincing him, and Dracula might not do what he needed.
“Iubitul,” the vampire murmured sadly. He shifted Jack so he had comfortable access to his neck. Jack smiled up at him.
“From now on, every time you do this, I’ll know you’re saying it.” He turned his head with one of the small sighs of contentment he gave when they made love.
Dracula drank then, more delicately than usual. He took a little more than usual too, but not very much. When he was done and healing the bite, Jack’s eyelids fluttered, and he smiled and nodded. The vampire picked him up and carried him to bed, undressing him and snugging the bedclothes around him.
“What do you need? Food, something to drink ?”
“Can wait. ‘m cold. Need you,” he murmured, his voice barely audible.
Silently, Dracula undressed and slipped under the covers, wrapping himself around Jack, who was shivering slightly. To know how much Jack needed him - loved him - was humbling in a way that nothing else had ever been. The ease and freedom with which Jack uttered the words humbled him as well. He needed and loved Jack just as much, and had recently come to a decision.
“Jackie?”
“Mmm?”
“There is some research you must do, for me. Medical research.”
“ ‘kay. What do you need?”
“I want you to find something - a solution, a potion, a compound - that will age me, so that I will die when you age and die. So that my life will end when you are gone from me,” Dracula explained.
Jack stiffened slightly, and turned to him.
“But you could just turn me-“
“No! No, Jack,” he forced himself to a calmer response. “I love you for who you are now, for all the things Dr Helsing said of you - kind, caring, giving, honest. Loving. It would change you - torment you. And no because it cannot be controlled or predicted. Do you think I could bear it if because of me, you became a Lucy?” Dracula’s voice was strained. “It should be as I’ve said. I will not want to exist without you, Doctor Jack Seward.”
Jack tried to envelope him in a hug but he didn’t have the strength, so he simply stroked his side, soothing.
“That is the most incredibly loving thing anyone could ever say to me,” he whispered. “Please stop worrying. We have time - decades, even. We can do the research. We’ll find a way, if it’s what you want. You can keep feeding from me. I’ll bring home donor blood for now. We’ll work something out for that. Don’t panic, my love. It will be all right,” Jack insisted.
Dracula nuzzled his ear and neck, kissing his hair. How like his Jackie to try and comfort and reassure him, when it was his own life at possible risk. He would try to do as Jack asked of him, and to be more open about his fears. Jack needed Dracula to need him. He did, more than he ever could have dreamed when Dr Helsing brought Jack with her so many months ago. He would try to let Jack know more often. If today proved anything, it was that he no longer had to hold back; he could tell Jack whatever he needed or wanted to.
Jack was exhausted. He wasn’t going to remain conscious much longer, especially as he began to absorb the vibrations of love, relief, peace or whatever it was washing over him, emanating from the body and heart of his lover, his love and his protector. They would go on, facing whatever came, together. He would be better tomorrow, and he was determined to make Dracula feel more hopeful. Just now, though, being loved in the vampire’s strong arms was everything he needed.
“Sweet dreams, my Jackie.”
Yes, Jack thought, as he slipped into unconsciousness, they definitely would be.